Would you like to inspect the original subtitles? These are the user uploaded subtitles that are being translated:
1
00:00:01,000 --> 00:00:04,045
[Music]
2
00:00:04,212 --> 00:00:05,546
Well, boys,
there she is--
3
00:00:05,713 --> 00:00:07,590
our brand-new
water heater.
4
00:00:07,757 --> 00:00:09,133
Ain't she a beauty?
5
00:00:09,300 --> 00:00:12,845
Yep. This is
the best water heater ever.
6
00:00:13,012 --> 00:00:16,349
God bless us every one.
7
00:00:16,516 --> 00:00:20,686
You know why tiny Tim
walked with a crutch?
8
00:00:20,853 --> 00:00:24,440
'Cause he had
a smart mouth?
9
00:00:24,607 --> 00:00:27,693
That's right.
10
00:00:27,860 --> 00:00:30,279
So, guys, tomorrow
is the anniversary
11
00:00:30,446 --> 00:00:32,281
of Donna's and my
first kiss.
12
00:00:32,448 --> 00:00:34,283
And just for that,
I'm gonna give her
13
00:00:34,450 --> 00:00:36,452
something really special.
14
00:00:36,619 --> 00:00:38,037
You've been trying to
give her that for a year,
15
00:00:38,204 --> 00:00:42,124
and so far...
16
00:00:42,291 --> 00:00:45,545
Not that.
Something nice.
17
00:00:45,711 --> 00:00:47,171
Forman, man, trust me, okay?
18
00:00:47,338 --> 00:00:49,090
Just pick her some flowers.
19
00:00:49,257 --> 00:00:50,675
The fact that you
even remembered will
20
00:00:50,841 --> 00:00:53,761
guarantee you some action.
21
00:00:53,928 --> 00:00:56,889
And who doesn't
love the action, huh?
22
00:01:00,184 --> 00:01:02,436
Check out this necklace.
23
00:01:02,603 --> 00:01:03,938
Wow, man,
is that real gold?
24
00:01:04,105 --> 00:01:06,357
No.
25
00:01:06,524 --> 00:01:07,692
Real diamonds?
26
00:01:07,858 --> 00:01:09,777
No.
27
00:01:09,944 --> 00:01:11,904
But it costs 60 bucks.
28
00:01:12,071 --> 00:01:15,116
Nice!
Nice!
29
00:01:15,283 --> 00:01:16,242
Yeah, thanks.
30
00:01:16,409 --> 00:01:17,743
So, if you'll all
please avert your eyes,
31
00:01:17,910 --> 00:01:19,704
I have to, uh, get my
secret stash of cash.
32
00:01:19,870 --> 00:01:24,125
What, you mean
your candyland stash?
33
00:01:24,292 --> 00:01:25,668
My can...
34
00:01:25,835 --> 00:01:27,169
I don't keep my money
in the...
35
00:01:27,336 --> 00:01:28,713
Candyland box.
36
00:01:28,879 --> 00:01:30,214
You moved your money
from the candyland box?
37
00:01:30,381 --> 00:01:33,426
Oh, shut up
and turn around!
38
00:01:38,681 --> 00:01:40,182
Oh, my god,
you guys...
39
00:01:40,349 --> 00:01:42,143
Someone stole
all my money.
40
00:01:42,310 --> 00:01:45,855
From candyland?
41
00:01:47,815 --> 00:01:54,530
How could such a sad thing
happen in such a happy place?
42
00:01:54,697 --> 00:01:58,409
♪ Hangin' out ♪
43
00:01:58,576 --> 00:02:01,954
♪ down the street ♪
44
00:02:02,121 --> 00:02:05,708
♪ the same old thing ♪
45
00:02:05,875 --> 00:02:09,128
♪ we did last week ♪
46
00:02:09,295 --> 00:02:12,965
♪ not a thing to do ♪
47
00:02:13,132 --> 00:02:16,844
♪ but talk to you ♪
48
00:02:17,011 --> 00:02:21,140
♪ we're all all right ♪
♪ we're all all right ♪
49
00:02:21,307 --> 00:02:23,643
Hello, Wisconsin!
50
00:02:30,691 --> 00:02:32,151
TV: And the winner,
and still champion,
51
00:02:32,318 --> 00:02:34,362
Muhammad Ali.
52
00:02:34,528 --> 00:02:35,613
Heh heh.
53
00:02:35,780 --> 00:02:36,781
All right, Fez, you lose.
54
00:02:36,947 --> 00:02:38,699
Give me 5 bucks.
55
00:02:38,866 --> 00:02:40,660
Hey.
What's goin' on?
56
00:02:40,826 --> 00:02:43,746
I just lost 5 bucks
on the Muhammad Ali fight.
57
00:02:43,913 --> 00:02:48,876
Fez, that's a rerun. That
fight happened a week ago.
58
00:02:53,839 --> 00:02:55,675
So what are
you guys doing?
59
00:02:55,841 --> 00:02:58,469
We're playing candyland.
60
00:02:58,636 --> 00:03:02,556
And I'm stuck in the
marshmallow mountain again.
61
00:03:03,474 --> 00:03:04,725
Where's Eric?
62
00:03:04,892 --> 00:03:06,102
I don't know.
He's searching the house.
63
00:03:06,268 --> 00:03:07,478
He can't find
his money stash.
64
00:03:07,645 --> 00:03:10,314
It's not in
the candyland box?
65
00:03:11,482 --> 00:03:13,150
Oh, my god.
You guys...
66
00:03:13,317 --> 00:03:16,862
Guess who's gonna be in the
miss dairy Princess pageant.
67
00:03:17,029 --> 00:03:20,116
Oh, I know.
A cow?
68
00:03:24,203 --> 00:03:25,454
No.
69
00:03:25,621 --> 00:03:27,373
Me!
70
00:03:27,540 --> 00:03:28,749
A beauty pageant?
71
00:03:28,916 --> 00:03:30,209
Yeah! I mean,
look, Donna,
72
00:03:30,376 --> 00:03:31,585
it's not enough
that we know
73
00:03:31,752 --> 00:03:32,920
I'm prettier
than everyone else.
74
00:03:33,087 --> 00:03:35,881
I want the world
to know!
75
00:03:36,048 --> 00:03:37,425
And what better way
to do it
76
00:03:37,591 --> 00:03:40,261
than go on stage and parade
around like a piece of meat.
77
00:03:40,428 --> 00:03:42,638
I know! I know!
78
00:03:43,639 --> 00:03:45,141
And get this--
79
00:03:45,307 --> 00:03:49,937
Michael is gonna be
my pageant boy!
80
00:03:50,104 --> 00:03:52,440
Ha ha ha ha!
81
00:03:55,109 --> 00:03:57,778
Pageant boy.
82
00:03:58,320 --> 00:04:00,114
Jackie, I am not
a pageant boy.
83
00:04:00,281 --> 00:04:03,200
I'm a beauty coach.
84
00:04:03,367 --> 00:04:06,162
Yeah, that's
a lot better, kelso.
85
00:04:06,328 --> 00:04:08,956
So, Donna, you want
to go see my gown?
86
00:04:09,123 --> 00:04:11,250
Let's go.
87
00:04:12,001 --> 00:04:13,794
Oh, I will help.
88
00:04:13,961 --> 00:04:16,630
I have a way
with woman's hair.
89
00:04:21,302 --> 00:04:23,512
Let's go, girls.
90
00:04:25,431 --> 00:04:27,016
Man, a beauty coach?
91
00:04:27,183 --> 00:04:28,601
What's goin' on
with you?
92
00:04:28,768 --> 00:04:29,977
When Jackie
wins this pageant,
93
00:04:30,144 --> 00:04:32,188
I am gonna be the guy
with the hottest chick
94
00:04:32,354 --> 00:04:35,316
of all of the hot chicks.
95
00:04:35,983 --> 00:04:38,235
Yeah, kelso,
that-- that's genius.
96
00:04:38,402 --> 00:04:41,071
Yeah. Just picture it.
97
00:04:41,906 --> 00:04:46,243
And...this year's
miss dairy Princess is...
98
00:04:46,410 --> 00:04:49,413
Kelso's girlfriend!
99
00:04:49,580 --> 00:04:51,040
Yes!
100
00:04:51,207 --> 00:04:53,083
Hoo hoo hoo!
101
00:04:53,250 --> 00:04:54,794
Oh, thank you!
102
00:04:54,960 --> 00:04:56,086
Thank you.
103
00:04:56,253 --> 00:04:57,546
Thank you, Bob eubanks.
104
00:04:57,713 --> 00:04:58,964
Mr. Kelso, now that
you've been crowned,
105
00:04:59,131 --> 00:05:00,424
what's going to be
your first order of business?
106
00:05:00,591 --> 00:05:02,134
Well, as Mr. Dairy Princess,
107
00:05:02,301 --> 00:05:03,677
I would like to give
milk products
108
00:05:03,844 --> 00:05:06,222
to all of those in need.
109
00:05:06,388 --> 00:05:07,598
And then someday,
110
00:05:07,765 --> 00:05:08,974
I would like to rule
111
00:05:09,141 --> 00:05:12,770
an entire hot chick
dairy kingdom!
112
00:05:12,937 --> 00:05:16,023
Ho ho ho ho ho...
113
00:05:16,190 --> 00:05:17,566
Settle down, girls.
114
00:05:17,733 --> 00:05:20,986
There's plenty of me
to go around here.
115
00:05:26,867 --> 00:05:28,702
Ooh...
116
00:05:28,869 --> 00:05:29,954
Well...
117
00:05:30,120 --> 00:05:32,581
Okay, I gotta go
win this thing.
118
00:05:34,708 --> 00:05:37,127
All right,
where's my money?
119
00:05:37,294 --> 00:05:38,546
What money?
120
00:05:38,712 --> 00:05:42,883
The money you stole
from my...
121
00:05:43,050 --> 00:05:45,761
Special place.
122
00:05:46,846 --> 00:05:48,180
[Laughing]
123
00:05:48,347 --> 00:05:49,765
You mean...
The pathetic bundle of ones
124
00:05:49,932 --> 00:05:52,726
you keep in your little
candyland game?
125
00:05:52,893 --> 00:05:55,813
So you admit
you knew where it was.
126
00:05:56,397 --> 00:05:57,648
Okay, Eric,
first of all,
127
00:05:57,815 --> 00:05:59,066
you were a mistake.
128
00:05:59,233 --> 00:06:03,737
Ask mom and dad.
129
00:06:03,904 --> 00:06:05,739
And second,
if I did steal it,
130
00:06:05,906 --> 00:06:09,869
I'd tell you to your face,
and then I'd steal it more.
131
00:06:10,035 --> 00:06:11,245
Yeah, that does
sound like you.
132
00:06:11,412 --> 00:06:14,081
Damn! Who took my money?
133
00:06:14,248 --> 00:06:16,083
Isn't it obvious
who took it?
134
00:06:16,250 --> 00:06:17,543
I mean, think about it.
135
00:06:17,710 --> 00:06:19,920
No morals.
Lack of character.
136
00:06:20,087 --> 00:06:22,131
Bad reputation.
137
00:06:22,298 --> 00:06:25,342
So you did take it.
138
00:06:25,509 --> 00:06:27,136
No, you idiot.
Hyde.
139
00:06:27,303 --> 00:06:28,762
He's staying
down in the basement,
140
00:06:28,929 --> 00:06:32,766
he's poor,
he steals stuff.
141
00:06:32,933 --> 00:06:34,268
No.
142
00:06:34,435 --> 00:06:35,936
No. Hyde wouldn't
do that to me.
143
00:06:36,103 --> 00:06:38,939
I'm sure you're right, Eric.
He's a real good friend.
144
00:06:40,232 --> 00:06:41,442
So...
145
00:06:41,609 --> 00:06:44,028
Kelso tells me Hyde tried
to steal Donna last year.
146
00:06:44,194 --> 00:06:45,529
Is that true?
147
00:06:45,696 --> 00:06:48,407
No.
148
00:06:48,574 --> 00:06:49,867
I mean...Well...
149
00:06:50,034 --> 00:06:52,953
He tried, but he
didn't succeed.
150
00:06:53,120 --> 00:06:56,582
Hmm...that's not much
better, is it, Eric?
151
00:06:59,835 --> 00:07:02,630
Was I really
a mistake?
152
00:07:02,796 --> 00:07:05,716
They sued
the condom company.
153
00:07:11,555 --> 00:07:13,223
So...
154
00:07:13,390 --> 00:07:15,392
So what do you
think?
155
00:07:15,559 --> 00:07:16,894
Jackie,
if you want to win,
156
00:07:17,061 --> 00:07:19,855
that dress has to be
a lot shorter.
157
00:07:20,773 --> 00:07:23,609
Give to Fez.
158
00:07:24,526 --> 00:07:27,237
Okay, Jackie,
let's get to work.
159
00:07:27,404 --> 00:07:29,323
Well, Michael,
we've already done a lot.
160
00:07:29,490 --> 00:07:30,950
I mean, I decided on
this dress,
161
00:07:31,116 --> 00:07:32,993
and Fez is gonna
do my hair.
162
00:07:33,160 --> 00:07:34,745
All right. But I'm gonna tell
you something, Jackie.
163
00:07:34,912 --> 00:07:39,792
I've seen pictures of his
people, and they aren't pretty.
164
00:07:43,003 --> 00:07:46,006
Bite me, pageant boy.
165
00:07:47,007 --> 00:07:49,593
Coach.
166
00:07:49,760 --> 00:07:51,178
All right, fine.
167
00:07:51,345 --> 00:07:53,055
I guess we could
use the help.
168
00:07:53,222 --> 00:07:55,224
Fez, you can handle
Jackie's body,
169
00:07:55,391 --> 00:07:58,519
and I'll take care
of her mind.
170
00:08:03,148 --> 00:08:05,192
So, Jackie, does the winner get
a scholarship or something?
171
00:08:05,359 --> 00:08:06,944
Who cares?
College is for ugly girls
172
00:08:07,111 --> 00:08:10,531
who can't get
modeling contracts.
173
00:08:11,490 --> 00:08:13,033
No. College is for women
174
00:08:13,200 --> 00:08:14,785
who don't want to marry
the first idiot they meet
175
00:08:14,952 --> 00:08:19,248
and squeeze out
his bastard moron children.
176
00:08:20,958 --> 00:08:22,209
Hey, mom.
177
00:08:22,376 --> 00:08:23,502
When you were cleaning
up downstairs,
178
00:08:23,669 --> 00:08:25,379
you didn't happen to come
across 60 bucks, did you?
179
00:08:25,546 --> 00:08:31,343
Oh, Eric, did you lose
your candyland cash?
180
00:08:31,510 --> 00:08:34,013
Does everyone know
where I keep my money?
181
00:08:34,179 --> 00:08:37,766
Oh, I'm sorry, honey.
It was a good hiding place.
182
00:08:37,933 --> 00:08:41,437
Oh! Maybe you put it
in chutes and ladders.
183
00:08:43,897 --> 00:08:47,109
No. I checked.
184
00:08:48,485 --> 00:08:50,195
I mean, I don't know
who could have taken it.
185
00:08:50,362 --> 00:08:51,739
At first I thought
it was Laurie, but--
186
00:08:51,905 --> 00:08:53,365
oh, honey, no. Laurie
wouldn't steal from you.
187
00:08:53,532 --> 00:08:56,160
She steals from me.
188
00:08:56,326 --> 00:08:58,829
Right.
189
00:08:58,996 --> 00:09:01,373
So that only leaves
one person.
190
00:09:01,540 --> 00:09:05,335
I mean... he does
live in the basement.
191
00:09:05,502 --> 00:09:07,046
Oh, okay, now,
192
00:09:07,212 --> 00:09:09,381
if you are talking about
Steven, I'm gonna get mad.
193
00:09:09,548 --> 00:09:11,633
He is a good apple,
and he is your friend,
194
00:09:11,800 --> 00:09:15,054
and you can trust him.
195
00:09:15,220 --> 00:09:16,930
Can I? I mean...
196
00:09:17,097 --> 00:09:18,849
No, mom, I hate
thinking this.
197
00:09:19,016 --> 00:09:20,434
It's just...
198
00:09:20,601 --> 00:09:21,769
It all adds up.
199
00:09:21,935 --> 00:09:23,020
I mean, if not Hyde,
then who?
200
00:09:23,187 --> 00:09:26,023
Well, it could be...
201
00:09:28,567 --> 00:09:29,943
Okay, you know what?
202
00:09:30,110 --> 00:09:32,696
I do not want
to talk about this anymore.
203
00:09:34,031 --> 00:09:35,949
Okay.
204
00:09:36,116 --> 00:09:37,701
Oh--ha ha ha.
205
00:09:37,868 --> 00:09:39,203
Here comes
a dumb question.
206
00:09:39,369 --> 00:09:40,788
Uh...
207
00:09:40,954 --> 00:09:44,124
I wasn't a mistake,
was I?
208
00:09:44,291 --> 00:09:45,793
Oh, for--
209
00:09:45,959 --> 00:09:49,546
for--
210
00:09:49,713 --> 00:09:53,217
okay! Who wants
some cocoa?!
211
00:09:53,383 --> 00:09:55,928
Ha ha ha ha!
212
00:09:59,306 --> 00:10:01,517
Okay, Jackie,
in 30 seconds or less,
213
00:10:01,683 --> 00:10:03,143
what do you hope
to accomplish
214
00:10:03,310 --> 00:10:05,646
as miss dairy Princess?
Go!
215
00:10:05,813 --> 00:10:07,231
Um...
216
00:10:07,397 --> 00:10:09,483
[Makes timer clicking sound]
217
00:10:09,650 --> 00:10:11,110
Um...
218
00:10:11,276 --> 00:10:12,528
Um...
219
00:10:12,694 --> 00:10:14,029
Brrrnnng!
220
00:10:14,196 --> 00:10:18,700
You just lost, lady!
221
00:10:18,867 --> 00:10:20,244
Michael, I was thinking.
222
00:10:20,410 --> 00:10:21,578
Oh, really?
223
00:10:21,745 --> 00:10:24,331
Well, in 1974, miss
Alabama started thinking.
224
00:10:24,498 --> 00:10:25,707
Do you know
where she is now?
225
00:10:25,874 --> 00:10:29,419
Alabama.
226
00:10:29,586 --> 00:10:31,964
Eew!
227
00:10:32,422 --> 00:10:34,967
God, Michael, I don't want
to accomplish anything.
228
00:10:35,134 --> 00:10:37,928
I just want the title so I
can lord it over people.
229
00:10:38,095 --> 00:10:41,807
That's all I want, too, Jackie.
230
00:10:41,974 --> 00:10:43,267
[Chuckles]
231
00:10:43,433 --> 00:10:45,269
Okay, so the next
category's talent.
232
00:10:45,435 --> 00:10:46,979
I can sing.
233
00:10:47,146 --> 00:10:50,649
Oh, no, you can't.
234
00:10:55,154 --> 00:10:56,613
So...
235
00:10:56,780 --> 00:10:57,990
Boy, am I disappointed.
236
00:10:58,157 --> 00:11:00,993
I went to get my money,
but someone stole it.
237
00:11:01,160 --> 00:11:04,705
So forget the fake
gold necklace from sears.
238
00:11:04,872 --> 00:11:07,791
Now I gotta get Donna
a crappy gift.
239
00:11:08,959 --> 00:11:11,503
Hey, what would you guys
rather see Jackie do,
240
00:11:11,670 --> 00:11:15,048
walk a tightrope
or ride a mechanical bull?
241
00:11:17,009 --> 00:11:18,427
Well...
242
00:11:18,594 --> 00:11:20,220
Either way,
she'll fall on her ass,
243
00:11:20,387 --> 00:11:24,433
so...i like 'em both.
244
00:11:24,600 --> 00:11:29,062
So, Eric, which rat bastard...
245
00:11:29,229 --> 00:11:31,857
Do you think
stole your money?
246
00:11:32,024 --> 00:11:34,359
Well, I mean,
it's anyone's guess.
247
00:11:34,526 --> 00:11:36,028
For all I know,
I mean...
248
00:11:36,195 --> 00:11:38,614
It could be someone
in this very room.
249
00:11:38,780 --> 00:11:40,449
Ho ho ho.
250
00:11:40,616 --> 00:11:42,242
How exciting.
251
00:11:42,409 --> 00:11:44,203
A mystery.
252
00:11:44,369 --> 00:11:47,998
Is Fez a suspect?
253
00:11:48,165 --> 00:11:51,168
Yeah...probably not, Fez.
254
00:11:51,335 --> 00:11:54,254
Why not?
I can be evil.
255
00:11:54,421 --> 00:11:57,299
I hate you.
256
00:11:57,466 --> 00:11:59,885
See?
257
00:12:01,178 --> 00:12:04,431
Oh, Eric, I don't hate you.
I love you. I'm sorry.
258
00:12:06,141 --> 00:12:08,268
That's okay, Fez.
259
00:12:08,435 --> 00:12:11,271
And, uh, I'm also pretty sure
kelso here didn't take it.
260
00:12:13,565 --> 00:12:17,736
Hey, how long do you guys think
Jackie could hold her breath?
261
00:12:18,445 --> 00:12:20,447
Gee, inspector...
262
00:12:20,614 --> 00:12:22,866
So if it isn't kelso...
263
00:12:23,033 --> 00:12:25,202
And it isn't Fez...
264
00:12:25,369 --> 00:12:27,871
I wonder who you
could suspect...
265
00:12:28,038 --> 00:12:31,291
Dillhole.
266
00:12:31,458 --> 00:12:34,169
Uh-oh.
267
00:12:34,336 --> 00:12:37,506
Hyde...i didn't say
he took it.
268
00:12:40,425 --> 00:12:41,718
Hey...
269
00:12:41,885 --> 00:12:43,053
You guys know
what a funny word is?
270
00:12:43,220 --> 00:12:46,306
Pickle-weasel!
271
00:12:49,434 --> 00:12:50,811
Ha ha ha ha!
272
00:12:50,978 --> 00:12:53,146
Forman, then say
I didn't take it.
273
00:12:53,313 --> 00:12:56,275
You are both
bringing me down.
274
00:12:56,441 --> 00:12:58,235
Hyde, why don't you
just say
275
00:12:58,402 --> 00:13:01,029
you didn't take it.
276
00:13:01,196 --> 00:13:03,198
Ha ha ha ha!
277
00:13:03,365 --> 00:13:06,410
I shouldn't have to say
I didn't.
278
00:13:07,286 --> 00:13:09,538
[Breathing rapidly]
279
00:13:09,705 --> 00:13:11,748
Look, just tell me
you didn't
280
00:13:11,915 --> 00:13:14,334
and I'll totally
trust you.
281
00:13:15,335 --> 00:13:16,795
You know what's
a funny word?
282
00:13:16,962 --> 00:13:19,131
Pickle-weasel!
283
00:13:19,298 --> 00:13:20,757
Ha ha ha ha!
284
00:13:20,924 --> 00:13:22,050
How about I tell you this?
285
00:13:22,217 --> 00:13:24,636
Go to hell, forman!
286
00:13:25,554 --> 00:13:26,763
Oh, my god!
287
00:13:26,930 --> 00:13:28,098
Jackie should clog dance!
288
00:13:28,265 --> 00:13:31,059
We can't lose!
289
00:13:36,773 --> 00:13:38,942
Beauty pageant,
here we come!
290
00:13:39,109 --> 00:13:41,862
Ha ha ha!
291
00:13:43,572 --> 00:13:49,161
[Engine stalls]
292
00:13:50,454 --> 00:13:53,415
Aww, you ran out
of gas, you idiot.
293
00:13:53,582 --> 00:13:55,125
You forgot to get gas?
294
00:13:55,292 --> 00:13:57,294
God, Jackie, someone
had to hem your outfit
295
00:13:57,461 --> 00:13:59,087
for the clog dance.
296
00:13:59,254 --> 00:14:00,547
Michael, I told you,
297
00:14:00,714 --> 00:14:02,174
I'm not doing
a clog dance!
298
00:14:02,341 --> 00:14:04,760
God, your stupid Van
has ruined my life!
299
00:14:04,926 --> 00:14:06,511
Your life?
300
00:14:06,678 --> 00:14:08,430
What about my life?
301
00:14:08,597 --> 00:14:10,682
What about your life?!
302
00:14:10,849 --> 00:14:13,352
Jackie, we are a team.
And part of being a team
303
00:14:13,518 --> 00:14:16,938
is that you have to do
exactly what I tell you.
304
00:14:18,231 --> 00:14:19,524
I...you know, Jackie,
305
00:14:19,691 --> 00:14:22,486
there is no "u"
in "teamwork"!
306
00:14:27,741 --> 00:14:29,868
[Crying]
307
00:14:30,035 --> 00:14:32,496
Oh, Jackie,
you're upset.
308
00:14:32,662 --> 00:14:34,956
Come, sit on my lap.
309
00:14:41,671 --> 00:14:43,673
Ahh...
310
00:14:43,840 --> 00:14:45,258
Ta-da!
311
00:14:45,425 --> 00:14:46,593
Happy anniversary!
312
00:14:46,760 --> 00:14:48,470
Oh, my god.
313
00:14:48,637 --> 00:14:51,890
Wow, they're--
they're beautiful.
314
00:14:52,057 --> 00:14:53,642
I got you something, too.
315
00:14:53,809 --> 00:14:55,435
Here, open it.
316
00:14:55,602 --> 00:14:57,729
Oh, my god.
317
00:14:57,896 --> 00:14:59,689
It's a watch.
318
00:14:59,856 --> 00:15:03,860
And it's all
digital and stuff!
319
00:15:04,528 --> 00:15:05,946
Oh, gee,
look at that.
320
00:15:06,113 --> 00:15:07,531
You had it engraved.
321
00:15:07,697 --> 00:15:09,449
What, you don't like it?
322
00:15:09,616 --> 00:15:10,867
No. No, I love it.
323
00:15:11,034 --> 00:15:12,828
It's just...
324
00:15:12,994 --> 00:15:14,746
Man, you spent
a lot of money on this.
325
00:15:14,913 --> 00:15:18,208
Yeah, which means
you better start putting out.
326
00:15:20,836 --> 00:15:22,504
Okay, it's kind of hard
to be a tease
327
00:15:22,671 --> 00:15:26,967
if you're not
playing along.
328
00:15:27,134 --> 00:15:29,970
Donna, I was going to get you
something really great, but--
329
00:15:30,137 --> 00:15:33,723
yeah, I heard about the
crime spree in candyland.
330
00:15:34,766 --> 00:15:36,017
Yeah.
331
00:15:36,184 --> 00:15:37,602
Oh! You want to see
a picture
332
00:15:37,769 --> 00:15:39,146
of what I was
going to get you?
333
00:15:39,312 --> 00:15:41,523
Sure.
334
00:15:43,275 --> 00:15:46,403
You were gonna
get me that?
335
00:15:46,862 --> 00:15:49,781
My god,
that's so pretty.
336
00:15:50,407 --> 00:15:51,575
What do you think,
by Christmas maybe,
337
00:15:51,741 --> 00:15:53,827
if you save your money?
338
00:15:53,994 --> 00:15:55,120
Donna...
339
00:15:55,287 --> 00:15:56,455
Well, Eric,
after seeing this,
340
00:15:56,621 --> 00:15:59,666
I mean, I hate
these crappy flowers.
341
00:15:59,833 --> 00:16:03,086
I know. I didn't want to give
you crappy flowers.
342
00:16:03,879 --> 00:16:05,755
I'm kidding.
I'm kidding.
343
00:16:05,922 --> 00:16:10,010
I love the flowers.
344
00:16:15,599 --> 00:16:17,267
But, you know...
345
00:16:17,434 --> 00:16:20,103
Maybe if I return that watch,
I can get this for myself.
346
00:16:20,270 --> 00:16:21,354
Gimme the watch back!
347
00:16:21,521 --> 00:16:22,481
No way!
348
00:16:22,647 --> 00:16:24,524
Gimme it!
349
00:16:24,691 --> 00:16:27,027
Come and get it!
350
00:16:27,777 --> 00:16:30,697
I don't know, Fez,
351
00:16:30,864 --> 00:16:31,531
maybe Michael was right.
352
00:16:31,698 --> 00:16:33,116
Maybe I don't have
what it takes
353
00:16:33,283 --> 00:16:34,743
to win the pageant
by myself.
354
00:16:34,910 --> 00:16:35,994
That is nonsense.
355
00:16:36,161 --> 00:16:38,955
You are pretty and nice
and talented and sweet,
356
00:16:39,122 --> 00:16:42,083
and everything good
in the whole world is you.
357
00:16:43,168 --> 00:16:44,503
I know, I know.
358
00:16:44,669 --> 00:16:47,047
That's what
I told Michael.
359
00:16:47,214 --> 00:16:48,381
But then he said--
360
00:16:48,548 --> 00:16:50,967
who cares
what Michael said?
361
00:16:51,134 --> 00:16:52,511
He was using you
for your beauty
362
00:16:52,677 --> 00:16:55,263
so he could
become popular.
363
00:16:55,430 --> 00:16:58,433
He makes me sick.
364
00:16:59,476 --> 00:17:00,977
God...
365
00:17:01,144 --> 00:17:03,772
I never thought
of it that way.
366
00:17:06,942 --> 00:17:09,069
Okay, Jackie...
367
00:17:09,236 --> 00:17:10,654
I've had some time
to think,
368
00:17:10,820 --> 00:17:12,489
and, uh...
369
00:17:12,656 --> 00:17:15,158
I'm still disappointed
in you...
370
00:17:15,325 --> 00:17:16,660
But I'm willing
to talk about--
371
00:17:16,826 --> 00:17:17,911
okay, stop.
372
00:17:18,078 --> 00:17:19,246
Michael, stop.
373
00:17:19,412 --> 00:17:20,372
I've been talking
to Fez,
374
00:17:20,539 --> 00:17:23,667
and I have only
one thing to say to you.
375
00:17:24,626 --> 00:17:26,044
I love you!
376
00:17:26,211 --> 00:17:27,629
What?!
377
00:17:27,796 --> 00:17:29,005
See, Michael,
you must have
378
00:17:29,172 --> 00:17:30,257
really believed in me
to think you could
379
00:17:30,423 --> 00:17:32,717
ride my coattails
to the top.
380
00:17:37,305 --> 00:17:38,807
Okay, get off me,
381
00:17:38,974 --> 00:17:40,267
both of you.
382
00:17:40,433 --> 00:17:44,145
You make me sick.
383
00:17:49,359 --> 00:17:50,860
[Clears throat]
384
00:17:51,027 --> 00:17:52,320
Hey, what are you
doin', red?
385
00:17:52,487 --> 00:17:53,947
Ah, I borrowed Eric's
candyland money
386
00:17:54,114 --> 00:17:57,117
to pay for
the water heater.
387
00:17:58,577 --> 00:17:59,953
You, uh...
388
00:18:00,120 --> 00:18:01,413
You took Eric's money?
389
00:18:01,580 --> 00:18:04,416
Shh. He doesn't know
a thing about it.
390
00:18:06,042 --> 00:18:08,211
It's back now.
He'll be none the wiser.
391
00:18:09,462 --> 00:18:12,173
Hey-hey!
How ya doin'?
392
00:18:13,425 --> 00:18:15,176
Look, Hyde,
I just got back
393
00:18:15,343 --> 00:18:16,553
from hanging out
with Donna,
394
00:18:16,720 --> 00:18:18,513
and you know what?
Hyde, I don't even care
395
00:18:18,680 --> 00:18:20,015
what happened
to my money.
396
00:18:20,181 --> 00:18:22,601
'Cause money doesn't make
the world go around.
397
00:18:22,767 --> 00:18:24,019
You know what does?
398
00:18:24,185 --> 00:18:26,855
Screw you.
You called me a thief.
399
00:18:28,231 --> 00:18:29,482
It's love.
400
00:18:29,649 --> 00:18:34,362
That's right.
401
00:18:35,155 --> 00:18:37,240
Love makes the world
go around.
402
00:18:37,407 --> 00:18:38,700
Well, that's great.
403
00:18:38,867 --> 00:18:41,578
Because red
took your money.
404
00:18:41,745 --> 00:18:43,038
[Laughs]
405
00:18:43,204 --> 00:18:45,206
Right, Hyde. My dad
took it. Yeah.
406
00:18:45,373 --> 00:18:47,584
Why don't you
ask him, forman?
407
00:18:49,127 --> 00:18:50,712
Uh, dad...
408
00:18:50,879 --> 00:18:52,380
Hyde said you
took my money?
409
00:18:52,547 --> 00:18:54,674
Oh, yeah. I was a little
short on the water heater.
410
00:18:54,841 --> 00:18:57,427
Thanks for helping out.
411
00:18:59,888 --> 00:19:02,849
Good news, buddy.
You're cleared.
412
00:19:04,643 --> 00:19:06,561
Why don't you
get bent, man?
413
00:19:06,728 --> 00:19:07,979
Wait a minute.
414
00:19:08,146 --> 00:19:10,565
You accused Steven
of stealing your money?
415
00:19:10,732 --> 00:19:12,484
Well...yeah,
but to be fair, dad,
416
00:19:12,651 --> 00:19:15,779
that was before I found
out you stole it.
417
00:19:15,945 --> 00:19:17,989
Which brings up
why you didn't ask me,
418
00:19:18,156 --> 00:19:22,202
and also, you know,
you could've told me.
419
00:19:23,161 --> 00:19:25,080
Well, you could've.
420
00:19:25,246 --> 00:19:27,624
Okay...
421
00:19:27,791 --> 00:19:30,460
I'm sorry that I...
422
00:19:30,627 --> 00:19:35,256
Took some money
out of your little box...
423
00:19:35,423 --> 00:19:37,550
When I feed you
and clothe you
424
00:19:37,717 --> 00:19:40,595
and put a roof
over your head.
425
00:19:40,762 --> 00:19:43,932
Sor...ry.
426
00:19:46,017 --> 00:19:47,727
Now...
427
00:19:47,894 --> 00:19:49,688
How could you do that
to Steven?
428
00:19:49,854 --> 00:19:52,148
He's your best friend.
429
00:19:52,315 --> 00:19:54,734
Well...he made a move
on Donna.
430
00:19:54,901 --> 00:19:57,654
Oh, come on.
431
00:19:58,446 --> 00:20:00,323
Okay.
432
00:20:00,490 --> 00:20:03,243
[Clears throat]
433
00:20:03,410 --> 00:20:04,577
Well, then, there's only
one thing that we can do.
434
00:20:04,744 --> 00:20:08,164
9 rounds of
bare-knuckle boxing.
435
00:20:09,249 --> 00:20:11,126
Come on.
436
00:20:11,292 --> 00:20:14,045
Help me move the couch.
437
00:20:15,130 --> 00:20:16,423
Wait, uh, dad, I don't--
438
00:20:16,589 --> 00:20:17,799
no, no, no, no.
439
00:20:17,966 --> 00:20:19,134
I'll referee.
440
00:20:19,300 --> 00:20:20,468
Believe me,
when it's over,
441
00:20:20,635 --> 00:20:23,346
you'll both feel great.
442
00:20:23,513 --> 00:20:26,349
I know I will.
443
00:20:26,516 --> 00:20:27,809
Red--
444
00:20:27,976 --> 00:20:30,478
look, if you're not mad enough
to bare-knuckle box,
445
00:20:30,645 --> 00:20:33,773
then you're not mad.
446
00:20:33,940 --> 00:20:35,316
Now, both of you
447
00:20:35,483 --> 00:20:39,404
need to just
get the hell over it.
448
00:20:45,285 --> 00:20:47,495
Once again, red's
simple, earthy wisdom
449
00:20:47,662 --> 00:20:50,957
saves the day.
450
00:20:51,124 --> 00:20:54,002
Yeah. Ain't he a peach?
451
00:20:55,587 --> 00:20:57,630
Look, Hyde...
452
00:20:57,797 --> 00:21:00,467
I just...
453
00:21:00,633 --> 00:21:03,511
God, I'm so sorry.
454
00:21:03,678 --> 00:21:05,180
You know what, man?
455
00:21:05,346 --> 00:21:07,390
You either forgive me for
what happened with Donna,
456
00:21:07,557 --> 00:21:09,184
or you don't.
457
00:21:09,350 --> 00:21:11,978
You can't keep throwing
that in my face.
458
00:21:13,146 --> 00:21:14,397
Yeah.
459
00:21:14,564 --> 00:21:15,982
Yeah, you're right.
460
00:21:16,149 --> 00:21:17,275
Um...it's over.
461
00:21:17,442 --> 00:21:20,737
I'm never gonna bring
it up again. I promise.
462
00:21:22,280 --> 00:21:24,532
Yeah, all right.
463
00:21:24,699 --> 00:21:26,743
Whoa.
464
00:21:26,910 --> 00:21:28,328
Man, she got you
this watch,
465
00:21:28,495 --> 00:21:31,915
and all you got her
were those crappy flowers?
466
00:21:32,081 --> 00:21:33,416
You loser!
467
00:21:33,583 --> 00:21:36,294
You loser.
Whoa.
468
00:21:37,629 --> 00:21:39,589
[Clog dancing music plays]
469
00:21:40,298 --> 00:21:45,261
Captioning made possible by carsey-Werner
productions and fox broadcasting company
470
00:21:46,805 --> 00:21:50,016
yeah! Dance, baby, dance!
471
00:21:53,853 --> 00:21:56,439
Go, Jackie!
472
00:21:58,983 --> 00:22:03,112
Looking good, baby!
473
00:22:03,136 --> 00:22:08,136
http://hiqve.com/
31423
Can't find what you're looking for?
Get subtitles in any language from opensubtitles.com, and translate them here.
Afrikaans
Akan
Albanian
Amharic
Arabic
Armenian
Azerbaijani
Basque
Belarusian
Bemba
Bengali
Bihari
Bosnian
Breton
Bulgarian
Cambodian
Catalan
Cebuano
Cherokee
Chichewa
Chinese (Simplified)
Chinese (Traditional)
Corsican
Croatian
Czech
Danish
Dutch
English
Esperanto
Estonian
Faroese
Finnish
Galician
Georgian
German
Greek
Guarani
Haitian Creole
Hausa
Hawaiian
Hebrew
Hmong
Hungarian
Icelandic
Indonesian
Irish
Italian
Japanese
Kazakh
Kinyarwanda
Kirundi
Kongo
Korean
Krio (Sierra Leone)
Kurdish
Kyrgyz
Laothian
Latin
Latvian
Lithuanian
Luganda
Luo
Luxembourgish
Macedonian
Malagasy
Malay
Maltese
Maori
Mauritian Creole
Moldavian
Mongolian
Myanmar (Burmese)
Montenegrin
Nepali
Norwegian
Pashto
Persian
Polish
Portuguese (Brazil)
Portuguese (Portugal)
Quechua
Romanian
Romansh
Russian
Samoan
Scots Gaelic
Serbian
Sesotho
Setswana
Seychellois Creole
Shona
Sindhi
Sinhalese
Slovak
Slovenian
Somali
Spanish
Swedish
Tajik
Thai
Tigrinya
Tonga
Turkish
Turkmen
Ukrainian
Uzbek
Vietnamese
Welsh
Wolof