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http:
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http:/
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http://
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http://hi
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http://hiq
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http://hiqv
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http://hiqve
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http://hiqve.
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http://hiqve.c
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http://hiqve.co
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http://hiqve.com
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http://hiqve.com/
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http://hiqve.com/
19
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Will this day ever end?
20
00:00:16,224 --> 00:00:17,099
Yesterday did.
21
00:00:17,266 --> 00:00:18,893
But today's Friday, so...
22
00:00:19,060 --> 00:00:21,145
No.
23
00:00:24,232 --> 00:00:26,817
Oh, god,
it's destroy and give-back.
24
00:00:26,984 --> 00:00:28,236
Yeah, why do they
call them that?
25
00:00:28,402 --> 00:00:30,279
You're about to find out.
26
00:00:30,446 --> 00:00:32,573
Hey, foreplay.
27
00:00:32,740 --> 00:00:33,574
Ohh!
28
00:00:33,741 --> 00:00:34,617
Aww!
29
00:00:34,784 --> 00:00:36,494
I believe this is yours.
30
00:00:36,661 --> 00:00:37,745
You broke his pencil.
31
00:00:37,912 --> 00:00:38,663
That was great!
32
00:00:38,829 --> 00:00:40,122
And you gave it back!
33
00:00:40,289 --> 00:00:42,667
All right,
enough horseplay.
34
00:00:42,833 --> 00:00:44,835
Pipe down.
35
00:00:45,002 --> 00:00:47,755
I said, pipe down!
36
00:00:47,922 --> 00:00:51,050
Now, I've got an announcement
before study hall.
37
00:00:51,217 --> 00:00:54,595
Whoever burned their initials
in the football field
38
00:00:54,762 --> 00:00:58,516
I hope you're happy
with yourself, punk.
39
00:00:58,683 --> 00:01:02,436
There'll be no football practice
today until we've re-seeded.
40
00:01:02,603 --> 00:01:05,106
And I've watched that team.
I'm not impressed, boy.
41
00:01:05,273 --> 00:01:06,816
Let me tell you.
42
00:01:06,983 --> 00:01:09,485
They need all the practice
they can get.
43
00:01:09,652 --> 00:01:12,905
On a happier note--
44
00:01:13,072 --> 00:01:15,700
Eric?
45
00:01:15,866 --> 00:01:18,202
Donna?
46
00:01:18,369 --> 00:01:20,830
Do you need something to do?
47
00:01:20,997 --> 00:01:23,457
Actually,
we need to be excused.
48
00:01:23,624 --> 00:01:25,167
Uh, Donna and I are...
49
00:01:25,334 --> 00:01:26,836
Taking pictures
for the yearbook.
50
00:01:27,003 --> 00:01:28,129
Yeah.
51
00:01:28,296 --> 00:01:30,256
Well, if you say so, Eric.
52
00:01:32,592 --> 00:01:35,219
You wouldn't lie.
53
00:01:35,386 --> 00:01:36,887
Well...
54
00:01:37,054 --> 00:01:37,888
I might.
55
00:01:38,055 --> 00:01:41,058
Ha ha ha ha!
56
00:01:45,104 --> 00:01:46,314
This is great.
57
00:01:46,480 --> 00:01:48,774
Eric forman skips class.
58
00:01:48,941 --> 00:01:49,984
Yeah, well...
59
00:01:50,151 --> 00:01:53,821
Danger is my middle name.
60
00:01:53,988 --> 00:01:55,948
Why are we moving?
61
00:01:57,575 --> 00:01:58,159
Mommy!
62
00:01:58,326 --> 00:01:59,702
What are you guys
doing in here?
63
00:02:00,786 --> 00:02:04,040
What are you guys
doing in here?
64
00:02:04,206 --> 00:02:06,500
I cut class.
65
00:02:06,667 --> 00:02:09,295
Yeah, right. So what was there,
like a fire drill or something?
66
00:02:09,462 --> 00:02:11,422
No. Look,
I do bad things.
67
00:02:11,589 --> 00:02:13,549
[All laugh]
68
00:02:13,716 --> 00:02:14,759
I've ditched class before.
69
00:02:14,925 --> 00:02:17,511
Uh, is opie getting angry?
70
00:02:17,678 --> 00:02:20,056
What did I tell you
about calling me opie?
71
00:02:20,222 --> 00:02:23,017
Opie, look out for the keg
in the middle of the road!
72
00:02:35,154 --> 00:02:36,280
Wow.
73
00:02:36,447 --> 00:02:38,824
It is a keg...
74
00:02:38,991 --> 00:02:40,826
Of beer.
75
00:02:40,993 --> 00:02:43,245
It must be a sign.
76
00:02:43,412 --> 00:02:46,123
Of beer.
77
00:02:46,290 --> 00:02:49,251
Oh, that's it.
I'm cutting class every day.
78
00:02:52,463 --> 00:02:55,758
♪ Hangin' out ♪
79
00:02:55,925 --> 00:02:59,512
♪ down the street ♪
80
00:02:59,679 --> 00:03:03,182
♪ the same old thing ♪
81
00:03:03,349 --> 00:03:06,644
♪ we did last week ♪
82
00:03:06,811 --> 00:03:10,773
♪ not a thing to do ♪
83
00:03:10,940 --> 00:03:13,901
♪ but talk to you ♪
84
00:03:14,068 --> 00:03:15,861
♪ whoa, yeah! ♪♪
85
00:03:16,028 --> 00:03:18,489
Captioning made possible by carsey-Werner
productions and fox broadcasting company
86
00:03:18,656 --> 00:03:21,242
hello, Wisconsin!
87
00:03:27,581 --> 00:03:30,084
How did you find it?
88
00:03:30,251 --> 00:03:35,464
Driving down the road,
man, and there she was.
89
00:03:35,631 --> 00:03:39,468
Oh, it was the beer
in the headlights.
90
00:03:41,387 --> 00:03:44,557
That is my first
American joke.
91
00:03:44,724 --> 00:03:48,477
Wow. How often do you find
a mysterious keg of free beer?
92
00:03:48,644 --> 00:03:51,147
Only once in a while.
93
00:03:51,313 --> 00:03:52,106
You're right, forman, man.
94
00:03:52,273 --> 00:03:54,024
You are absolutely right.
95
00:03:54,191 --> 00:03:56,068
When god gives you a keg,
you gotta--
96
00:03:56,235 --> 00:03:58,738
kill a virgin.
97
00:04:01,824 --> 00:04:04,785
No.
98
00:04:04,952 --> 00:04:07,204
Throw a party.
99
00:04:11,041 --> 00:04:13,002
Go for it, Eric.
100
00:04:13,169 --> 00:04:16,505
Yeah, we'll throw a party.
Charge 2 bucks a head.
101
00:04:16,672 --> 00:04:18,257
2 bucks a head.
102
00:04:18,424 --> 00:04:19,717
A keg is equivalent
to seven cases.
103
00:04:19,884 --> 00:04:20,926
That's 168 beers.
104
00:04:21,093 --> 00:04:22,344
If we each drink
three beers apiece--
105
00:04:22,511 --> 00:04:24,472
no way. Sophomore's
gonna drink one, maybe.
106
00:04:24,638 --> 00:04:25,556
True.
107
00:04:25,723 --> 00:04:28,976
And the freshman,
he's gonna drink a half.
108
00:04:29,143 --> 00:04:31,270
So that averages out
to 1 .5 beers per person,
109
00:04:31,437 --> 00:04:32,730
which means
we can invite 112 people.
110
00:04:32,897 --> 00:04:35,399
And that's 224 bucks.
111
00:04:35,566 --> 00:04:37,151
Cash.
112
00:04:37,318 --> 00:04:37,985
Which is...
113
00:04:38,152 --> 00:04:41,322
Decent.
Decent.
114
00:04:41,489 --> 00:04:42,907
Ok, grab some ice
out of the deep freeze,
115
00:04:43,073 --> 00:04:44,909
I'll grab the tub.
116
00:04:45,075 --> 00:04:47,328
Oh, that is one
sweet mama.
117
00:04:49,163 --> 00:04:50,664
Hey, gang.
118
00:04:50,831 --> 00:04:52,750
Oh, oh, don't mind me.
119
00:04:52,917 --> 00:04:54,752
Just came down to do
an emergency presoak
120
00:04:54,919 --> 00:04:57,296
on my nurse's uniform.
121
00:04:57,463 --> 00:05:00,049
You remember
Mr. Wilbur the fireman?
122
00:05:00,216 --> 00:05:03,719
Well, he came in today
with a sebaceous cyst,
123
00:05:03,886 --> 00:05:06,222
which is a, um,
a pocket of fluid
124
00:05:06,388 --> 00:05:09,725
that's kind of like
a pus-ey bath oil bead
125
00:05:09,892 --> 00:05:10,935
under the skin.
126
00:05:11,101 --> 00:05:12,728
And you think it's solid,
127
00:05:12,895 --> 00:05:14,271
but if you take
an instrument
128
00:05:14,438 --> 00:05:17,066
and you Pierce the core,
129
00:05:17,233 --> 00:05:20,361
and then you apply
pressure with your thumb--
130
00:05:20,528 --> 00:05:21,695
well, hi, snicklefritz.
131
00:05:21,862 --> 00:05:23,906
What are you doing
with the tub?
132
00:05:24,073 --> 00:05:24,824
Oh.
133
00:05:24,990 --> 00:05:26,408
The tub.
134
00:05:26,575 --> 00:05:28,202
We were just...
135
00:05:28,369 --> 00:05:31,247
W-Working on
a class project.
136
00:05:31,413 --> 00:05:34,667
We're making a volcano.
137
00:05:34,834 --> 00:05:37,586
Snicklefritz.
138
00:05:37,753 --> 00:05:38,796
Out of ice?
139
00:05:38,963 --> 00:05:42,591
Well, I think
it might melt.
140
00:05:42,758 --> 00:05:44,301
Well, you heard her.
Let's move it, gang.
141
00:05:44,468 --> 00:05:47,012
Ok, well, have fun.
142
00:05:47,179 --> 00:05:48,806
Guys, we gotta get
that keg out of here.
143
00:05:48,973 --> 00:05:51,350
Well, where are we
having the party?
144
00:05:51,517 --> 00:05:52,810
Beats me.
If you guys need me,
145
00:05:52,977 --> 00:05:55,312
I'll be with Jackie over at
our secret make-out place.
146
00:05:55,479 --> 00:05:56,564
Secret make-out place.
147
00:05:56,730 --> 00:05:58,440
It's this vacant house
over on sherman.
148
00:05:58,607 --> 00:06:00,234
I mean,
this place is great.
149
00:06:00,401 --> 00:06:01,652
It's totally private.
150
00:06:01,819 --> 00:06:03,946
You can get away
with about anything there.
151
00:06:04,113 --> 00:06:05,906
So if you guys find
a place for that keg,
152
00:06:06,073 --> 00:06:08,242
let me know.
153
00:06:13,038 --> 00:06:15,916
I've got an idea.
154
00:06:17,501 --> 00:06:21,297
That's a sylvania,
isn't it, red?
155
00:06:21,463 --> 00:06:24,049
You didn't buy that
in my store, did ya?
156
00:06:24,216 --> 00:06:27,428
No, Bob. I, uh,
got a good deal on it.
157
00:06:28,637 --> 00:06:31,724
Ha, ha, ha, ha.
158
00:06:31,891 --> 00:06:32,892
You got me.
159
00:06:33,058 --> 00:06:35,728
Oh, you--
you got me, red.
160
00:06:35,895 --> 00:06:38,439
Well, I am just
so excited.
161
00:06:38,606 --> 00:06:40,524
Rich man, poor man.
162
00:06:40,691 --> 00:06:42,234
I missed
the first episode.
163
00:06:42,401 --> 00:06:44,194
Here's the irony
of the show, kitty.
164
00:06:44,361 --> 00:06:47,197
The rich, safe guy
is boring.
165
00:06:47,364 --> 00:06:48,324
It's the poor,
rugged one
166
00:06:48,490 --> 00:06:53,454
played by the very talented
Nick nolte who's so exciting.
167
00:06:53,621 --> 00:06:54,622
Well, super.
168
00:06:54,788 --> 00:06:56,415
Now, who would
like a drink?
169
00:06:56,582 --> 00:07:00,210
Ooh! Let's do
daiquiris, huh?
170
00:07:00,377 --> 00:07:02,504
Ooh, I don't know
if we have enough ice.
171
00:07:02,671 --> 00:07:06,050
Eric took
a whole tubful.
172
00:07:06,216 --> 00:07:09,136
He took a tub of ice?
173
00:07:09,303 --> 00:07:13,223
Oh, the kids are
making a volcano.
174
00:07:13,390 --> 00:07:18,312
Right. That's why Donna
left with all the plastic cups.
175
00:07:21,732 --> 00:07:22,983
Plastic cups?
176
00:07:23,150 --> 00:07:27,279
Sure. Plastic volcano cups.
177
00:07:27,446 --> 00:07:28,447
If I didn't know better,
178
00:07:28,614 --> 00:07:31,700
I'd say they were
having a kegger.
179
00:07:31,867 --> 00:07:34,203
Aw, jeez.
180
00:07:34,370 --> 00:07:35,746
Let's go, Bob.
181
00:07:36,664 --> 00:07:38,958
Ooh, rich man, poor man,
I love it.
182
00:07:39,124 --> 00:07:42,336
I just hope I don't
get too emotional.
183
00:07:42,503 --> 00:07:44,713
Oh, so do I.
184
00:07:46,090 --> 00:07:48,092
Those kids
could be anywhere.
185
00:07:48,258 --> 00:07:50,594
Needle in a haystack.
186
00:07:50,761 --> 00:07:54,264
Look, they left the house in
a wood-paneled ocean liner.
187
00:07:54,431 --> 00:07:57,101
We should be able
to find them.
188
00:07:57,267 --> 00:07:58,310
Yep...
189
00:07:58,477 --> 00:08:01,105
It's a real asphalt
jungle out here.
190
00:08:01,271 --> 00:08:04,191
Sun goes down,
the rats come out.
191
00:08:04,358 --> 00:08:07,444
I lost my mailbox
last year.
192
00:08:07,611 --> 00:08:09,697
Oh, yeah.
You know what it is.
193
00:08:09,863 --> 00:08:14,535
The evil spilling over
from sheboygan.
194
00:08:14,702 --> 00:08:16,578
Oh, how many stories
do you suppose there are
195
00:08:16,745 --> 00:08:19,707
in this naked burg?
196
00:08:19,873 --> 00:08:21,834
8, Bob.
197
00:08:22,001 --> 00:08:23,794
There are 8.
198
00:08:25,629 --> 00:08:28,132
Michael, this is our
secret make-out place.
199
00:08:28,298 --> 00:08:30,968
I did not swipe the key from
my mother's real estate office
200
00:08:31,135 --> 00:08:33,137
so you could have a party.
201
00:08:33,303 --> 00:08:35,723
I know,
it's like a bonus.
202
00:08:35,889 --> 00:08:38,100
I'm doing it
for you, baby.
203
00:08:38,267 --> 00:08:39,518
Oh.
204
00:08:39,685 --> 00:08:42,646
Well, ok.
205
00:08:45,190 --> 00:08:46,692
Whew.
206
00:08:46,859 --> 00:08:50,821
Empty pool,
empty house, full keg.
207
00:08:52,990 --> 00:08:55,075
You sure know how
to show a girl a good time.
208
00:08:55,242 --> 00:08:57,703
Yeah, well, I don't color
outside the lines often,
209
00:08:57,870 --> 00:09:01,206
but when I do,
jump back, Loretta.
210
00:09:02,207 --> 00:09:03,917
I don't care
what you ate, Fez.
211
00:09:04,084 --> 00:09:06,628
Get in the pool now!
212
00:09:06,795 --> 00:09:09,757
If I get a cramp,
it will be on your head.
213
00:09:11,341 --> 00:09:12,843
Ok.
214
00:09:13,010 --> 00:09:15,345
Hurry up
and drink your keg.
215
00:09:16,096 --> 00:09:18,265
Hurry up
and drink a keg?
216
00:09:18,432 --> 00:09:19,767
Jackie, will you just
mellow out?
217
00:09:19,933 --> 00:09:20,893
I mean, this rules.
218
00:09:21,060 --> 00:09:23,353
We got a keg, and soon
everybody's gonna be here.
219
00:09:23,520 --> 00:09:24,480
Everybody?
220
00:09:24,646 --> 00:09:27,149
Everybody
who matters.
221
00:09:27,316 --> 00:09:29,359
And for the
first time, Jackie,
222
00:09:29,526 --> 00:09:31,737
that includes you.
223
00:09:31,904 --> 00:09:34,323
Get away from me!
224
00:09:35,240 --> 00:09:35,699
Huh!
225
00:09:35,866 --> 00:09:37,618
You heard her,
let's drink beer.
226
00:09:37,785 --> 00:09:38,327
Me first.
227
00:09:38,494 --> 00:09:39,411
No way.
I spotted it.
228
00:09:39,578 --> 00:09:42,206
I saw it, too.
I just didn't say anything.
229
00:09:42,372 --> 00:09:45,125
You saw a keg,
and you didn't say anything?
230
00:09:45,292 --> 00:09:47,878
Back of the line!
231
00:09:48,045 --> 00:09:49,630
All right, how do
you get the beer out?
232
00:09:49,797 --> 00:09:50,923
Through the tap.
233
00:09:51,090 --> 00:09:53,133
What tap?
234
00:09:54,051 --> 00:09:57,137
Nooooooooo!
235
00:10:05,854 --> 00:10:08,941
Ok, we really
need a tap here.
236
00:10:09,108 --> 00:10:11,985
I got my Swiss army knife.
237
00:10:12,152 --> 00:10:15,531
Oh, great, we can
whittle the beer out.
238
00:10:15,697 --> 00:10:17,825
All right, look, they sell
taps at the liquor store.
239
00:10:17,991 --> 00:10:24,206
Yeah, and who's got
the money to buy it, huh?
240
00:10:24,373 --> 00:10:27,417
Why would I bring money to our
secret make-out place, Michael?
241
00:10:27,584 --> 00:10:28,669
Ok, I've got my gas money.
242
00:10:28,836 --> 00:10:32,506
No, Eric, we're not gonna
take your gas money.
243
00:10:32,673 --> 00:10:33,799
Hey, it doesn't matter.
By the end of the night,
244
00:10:33,966 --> 00:10:35,384
we'll have made
over $200.
245
00:10:35,551 --> 00:10:36,218
Yeah.
246
00:10:36,385 --> 00:10:38,804
Michael, how are
we gonna make $200?
247
00:10:38,971 --> 00:10:41,431
I don't know.
248
00:10:41,598 --> 00:10:43,016
Hey, who's
buying the tap?
249
00:10:43,183 --> 00:10:43,976
You buy, I fly.
250
00:10:44,143 --> 00:10:46,395
No, Michael, you are--
Michael, come back here.
251
00:10:46,562 --> 00:10:47,938
Michael,
I am talking to you.
252
00:10:48,105 --> 00:10:49,565
Michael!
253
00:10:51,650 --> 00:10:56,905
Welcome to the pool.
I am your host Fez.
254
00:10:57,072 --> 00:10:59,408
$2, please.
255
00:10:59,575 --> 00:11:01,243
What is going on?
256
00:11:01,410 --> 00:11:02,744
I didn't want to
tell you before, Jackie,
257
00:11:02,911 --> 00:11:04,413
but we've taken it
upon ourselves
258
00:11:04,580 --> 00:11:06,832
to help your mom
show off the house
259
00:11:06,999 --> 00:11:09,209
at 2 bucks a head.
260
00:11:09,376 --> 00:11:11,336
He's lying to Jackie, man.
261
00:11:11,503 --> 00:11:13,589
I lie to Jackie.
262
00:11:13,755 --> 00:11:15,174
You know, it seems to
me that the scrawny
263
00:11:15,340 --> 00:11:18,093
little neighbor boy is willing
to engage in criminal acts
264
00:11:18,260 --> 00:11:21,889
for that saucy
redhead next door.
265
00:11:22,055 --> 00:11:23,223
Shut up. How do you know
he's not doing it
266
00:11:23,390 --> 00:11:25,392
to impress his friends?
267
00:11:25,559 --> 00:11:26,810
You know...
268
00:11:26,977 --> 00:11:28,604
Beer pressure.
269
00:11:28,770 --> 00:11:31,481
Because his friends
aren't saucy.
270
00:11:33,358 --> 00:11:35,444
Kelso's saucy.
271
00:11:35,611 --> 00:11:39,114
Kelso? Please.
I'm saucier than kelso.
272
00:11:42,242 --> 00:11:44,161
♪ Then the door
burst open wide ♪
273
00:11:44,328 --> 00:11:46,205
♪ and my daddy
stepped inside ♪
274
00:11:46,371 --> 00:11:48,498
♪ and he kissed
my mama's face ♪
275
00:11:48,665 --> 00:11:50,250
♪ and he brushed
her tears away ♪
276
00:11:50,417 --> 00:11:53,212
♪ the night Chicago died ♪
277
00:11:53,378 --> 00:11:56,632
Would you turn
that damn thing off!
278
00:11:56,798 --> 00:12:00,510
Keep your eyes peeled
for the vista cruiser.
279
00:12:00,677 --> 00:12:02,596
Okie dokie.
280
00:12:03,347 --> 00:12:06,725
♪ La la la la la
la la la la ♪
281
00:12:08,310 --> 00:12:09,978
Sorry.
282
00:12:15,442 --> 00:12:22,491
Hey. See you got
some new steins here.
283
00:12:22,658 --> 00:12:26,828
[Deep voice]
Hi, I'm 25.
284
00:12:26,995 --> 00:12:28,997
I know I look young,
but, uh...
285
00:12:29,164 --> 00:12:30,374
My dad asked me
to come down here
286
00:12:30,540 --> 00:12:32,584
and pick up a tap
for his keg.
287
00:12:32,751 --> 00:12:37,381
And, uh, he's 43, so we're both
legal. No problem there.
288
00:12:37,547 --> 00:12:40,634
Uh, I'm not gonna be drinking
the beer or anything.
289
00:12:40,801 --> 00:12:41,760
'Cause I don't believe in it.
290
00:12:41,927 --> 00:12:42,594
But no offense to you.
291
00:12:42,761 --> 00:12:44,054
I think selling liquor's
a great thing.
292
00:12:44,221 --> 00:12:47,975
Ok, here you go.
293
00:12:48,141 --> 00:12:50,602
Yeah. Heh heh.
294
00:12:50,769 --> 00:12:52,688
'Cause I'm 25, right?
295
00:12:52,854 --> 00:12:53,855
'Cause you got money.
296
00:12:54,022 --> 00:12:55,816
Yeah, but I am 25.
297
00:12:55,983 --> 00:12:58,026
Don't need to be.
Can't drink a tap.
298
00:12:58,193 --> 00:12:59,027
I can prove it to you.
299
00:12:59,194 --> 00:13:00,279
I got my I.D.S
out in the--
300
00:13:00,445 --> 00:13:02,155
it happens all the time.
Take care.
301
00:13:02,322 --> 00:13:02,823
Yeah, but i--
302
00:13:02,990 --> 00:13:05,534
leave now.
303
00:13:07,995 --> 00:13:09,538
Yeah.
304
00:13:12,708 --> 00:13:15,085
Oh ho ho ho, kelschmo.
305
00:13:15,252 --> 00:13:17,129
What you got there?
306
00:13:17,296 --> 00:13:18,213
That--that was
really funny,
307
00:13:18,380 --> 00:13:20,465
that thing you did
with my name--kelschmo.
308
00:13:20,632 --> 00:13:22,009
I gotta go.
309
00:13:25,137 --> 00:13:27,556
Ooh! Aww.
310
00:13:27,723 --> 00:13:28,974
I believe this is yours.
311
00:13:29,141 --> 00:13:31,101
[Goofy laugh]
312
00:13:31,268 --> 00:13:33,020
You broke his--
his thing.
313
00:13:33,186 --> 00:13:34,271
And you gave it back.
314
00:13:34,438 --> 00:13:35,105
That was great.
315
00:13:35,272 --> 00:13:37,024
Yeah, yeah.
316
00:13:38,525 --> 00:13:40,736
So you see what I'm saying
about the poor man?
317
00:13:40,902 --> 00:13:42,529
Yes. You have
made your point.
318
00:13:42,696 --> 00:13:44,114
Many times.
319
00:13:44,281 --> 00:13:46,700
He's a bad boy who's
had some rough breaks,
320
00:13:46,867 --> 00:13:49,453
but he isn't bad
in his soul.
321
00:13:49,619 --> 00:13:51,538
[Crying]
322
00:13:51,705 --> 00:13:55,292
Ok. Ok, enough
daiquiris for you.
323
00:13:58,211 --> 00:14:01,173
Kitty, what do you
look for in a man?
324
00:14:01,340 --> 00:14:02,966
Oh, well,
I'm married.
325
00:14:03,133 --> 00:14:05,177
I'm kinda
through looking.
326
00:14:05,344 --> 00:14:06,887
Oh kitty,
you can always look.
327
00:14:07,054 --> 00:14:08,388
It helps you
to fantasize.
328
00:14:08,555 --> 00:14:13,393
Like some nights i'm--I'm doing
the news with Walter cronkite.
329
00:14:15,395 --> 00:14:16,897
Ok, um, I'm just...
330
00:14:17,064 --> 00:14:20,233
You know, I'm gonna
finish your daiquiri.
331
00:14:23,820 --> 00:14:25,197
It's broken.
332
00:14:25,364 --> 00:14:27,824
I got duct tape.
333
00:14:27,991 --> 00:14:30,202
Duct tape? Do you
know how much pressure
334
00:14:30,369 --> 00:14:31,912
runs through that tap?
335
00:14:32,079 --> 00:14:35,374
I got a whole roll
of duct tape.
336
00:14:35,540 --> 00:14:37,042
I can't work like this.
337
00:14:37,209 --> 00:14:39,711
Forman, you need to get
your dad's tap now.
338
00:14:39,878 --> 00:14:42,631
My dad doesn't
have a tap.
339
00:14:42,798 --> 00:14:45,467
Red's got bicentennial
swizzle sticks.
340
00:14:45,634 --> 00:14:48,053
He's got fake lemons
with real lemon juice.
341
00:14:48,220 --> 00:14:50,430
He's got toothpicks
shaped like swords.
342
00:14:50,597 --> 00:14:53,517
Red forman
is a cocktail dad.
343
00:14:53,683 --> 00:14:57,020
And cocktail dads
have beer taps.
344
00:14:57,187 --> 00:14:59,439
Come on, Eric, we never
ask you for anything.
345
00:14:59,606 --> 00:15:02,567
You guys ask me
for everything!
346
00:15:02,734 --> 00:15:04,152
So what's
one more thing?
347
00:15:04,319 --> 00:15:05,362
No, forget it.
348
00:15:05,529 --> 00:15:06,780
I've done enough
today already.
349
00:15:06,947 --> 00:15:08,782
Count me out.
350
00:15:09,866 --> 00:15:11,910
Hey, kelschmo.
351
00:15:12,077 --> 00:15:13,662
What, your tap
is broken?
352
00:15:13,829 --> 00:15:17,958
Why did you do something stupid
like buy a stupid broken tap?
353
00:15:18,125 --> 00:15:20,585
What are you, stupid?
354
00:15:20,752 --> 00:15:23,922
It wasn't broken
until you broke it.
355
00:15:26,425 --> 00:15:29,886
Ohh, man.
356
00:15:30,053 --> 00:15:30,762
Don't beat yourself up.
357
00:15:30,929 --> 00:15:32,180
You had no way
of knowing.
358
00:15:32,347 --> 00:15:33,432
Anyway, we gave it back.
359
00:15:33,598 --> 00:15:34,433
Yeah, broken.
360
00:15:34,599 --> 00:15:35,392
Hey, lay off him,
all right?
361
00:15:35,559 --> 00:15:36,726
He feels
bad enough already.
362
00:15:36,893 --> 00:15:38,186
He should because
he's a moron.
363
00:15:38,353 --> 00:15:39,104
What did you say?
364
00:15:39,271 --> 00:15:41,314
I said that
you're both morons.
365
00:15:41,481 --> 00:15:43,150
What are you gonna do?
You gonna beat me up?
366
00:15:43,316 --> 00:15:45,193
You weigh 400 pounds together.
It doesn't matter.
367
00:15:45,360 --> 00:15:48,029
The fact is that the tap
is broken, and it's your fault.
368
00:15:48,196 --> 00:15:49,865
Morons!
369
00:15:51,700 --> 00:15:55,078
You are so rude.
370
00:15:55,245 --> 00:15:56,997
Give us our
4 bucks back.
371
00:15:57,164 --> 00:15:59,124
Ok, Fez...
372
00:16:02,377 --> 00:16:03,753
Familiar?
373
00:16:09,801 --> 00:16:11,303
Wow, Eric.
374
00:16:11,470 --> 00:16:13,180
You just
tore their money!
375
00:16:13,346 --> 00:16:14,848
Then you gave it back.
It was great.
376
00:16:15,015 --> 00:16:16,475
That was great.
377
00:16:16,641 --> 00:16:23,064
But enough of
this levity, wench.
378
00:16:23,231 --> 00:16:24,900
We came here
to have a party,
379
00:16:25,066 --> 00:16:29,029
and as god is my witness,
there will be a party.
380
00:16:30,822 --> 00:16:32,782
Huzzah! Huzzah! Huzzah!
381
00:16:38,622 --> 00:16:39,956
Nope, I haven't sold
a keg all day,
382
00:16:40,123 --> 00:16:42,709
but a young guy
did come in for a tap.
383
00:16:42,876 --> 00:16:45,253
Young guy, huh?
384
00:16:45,420 --> 00:16:49,549
Look, they got
piña colada in a can.
385
00:16:49,716 --> 00:16:52,010
Bob, we're doing
something here.
386
00:16:52,177 --> 00:16:53,678
Oh, right.
387
00:16:53,845 --> 00:16:55,805
You know...
388
00:16:55,972 --> 00:16:58,892
I might've heard
something about a party.
389
00:16:59,059 --> 00:17:00,477
Can't recall.
390
00:17:00,644 --> 00:17:05,607
Maybe, uh, Andrew Jackson
could remind me.
391
00:17:05,774 --> 00:17:09,152
Andrew Jackson, huh?
392
00:17:09,319 --> 00:17:13,782
He's not in.
393
00:17:13,949 --> 00:17:18,286
But Abe Lincoln's hanging out
with the Washington twins.
394
00:17:18,453 --> 00:17:22,374
Would they have any knowledge
of the festivities?
395
00:17:22,541 --> 00:17:28,046
So, a real
wisenheimer, huh?
396
00:17:28,213 --> 00:17:30,465
Well, let's see
how smart you are
397
00:17:30,632 --> 00:17:32,175
when I snap off your head!
398
00:17:32,342 --> 00:17:34,010
Ok, ok, man.
399
00:17:34,177 --> 00:17:37,514
They--they said something about
a vacant house on sherman.
400
00:17:37,681 --> 00:17:38,306
I know that place.
401
00:17:38,473 --> 00:17:41,977
It's the vacant house
on sherman.
402
00:17:42,143 --> 00:17:43,311
Good work...
403
00:17:43,478 --> 00:17:45,188
Starsky.
404
00:17:45,355 --> 00:17:48,525
Let's, uh, roll.
405
00:18:00,120 --> 00:18:01,746
Everybody
in the deep end.
406
00:18:01,913 --> 00:18:03,415
My mother
is showing the house.
407
00:18:03,582 --> 00:18:04,541
Now?
408
00:18:04,708 --> 00:18:06,376
People work.
409
00:18:06,543 --> 00:18:08,795
Pipe down, everybody!
410
00:18:09,879 --> 00:18:10,797
The deck is new,
411
00:18:10,964 --> 00:18:17,804
and this lovely tile walkway
leads directly to the pool.
412
00:18:17,971 --> 00:18:22,809
Which is filled with
some of the local kids.
413
00:18:22,976 --> 00:18:25,353
Heavily Caucasian.
414
00:18:25,520 --> 00:18:27,105
It's a nice neighborhood.
415
00:18:28,231 --> 00:18:31,318
Sometimes Bob
pretends he's poor.
416
00:18:31,484 --> 00:18:34,821
I call him buster.
417
00:18:34,988 --> 00:18:39,242
He knocks on the door,
and I answer in my Teddy.
418
00:18:39,409 --> 00:18:41,369
And he says,
"does the rich lady
419
00:18:41,536 --> 00:18:43,580
need any help
around the house?"
420
00:18:43,747 --> 00:18:44,873
And I say...
421
00:18:45,040 --> 00:18:50,337
"I know something that needs
attending to in the bedroom."
422
00:18:50,503 --> 00:18:55,175
I'll spare you the details,
but it ends in whoopee.
423
00:18:55,342 --> 00:18:57,510
Ha ha ha!
424
00:18:57,677 --> 00:19:03,475
You know, this is as much fun
to make as it is to eat.
425
00:19:03,642 --> 00:19:04,893
You know,
speaking of which,
426
00:19:05,060 --> 00:19:08,647
um, how do you get Bob
to play those games?
427
00:19:08,813 --> 00:19:11,941
I have a reward system.
428
00:19:12,942 --> 00:19:14,319
Huh.
429
00:19:15,654 --> 00:19:18,948
You know, sometimes red
would wear a sailor's uniform.
430
00:19:19,115 --> 00:19:20,200
Really?
431
00:19:20,367 --> 00:19:21,368
Yeah.
432
00:19:21,534 --> 00:19:22,911
But he was in the Navy.
433
00:19:27,999 --> 00:19:29,584
Ooh, kitty.
434
00:19:29,751 --> 00:19:31,711
Ooh.
435
00:19:39,678 --> 00:19:41,930
Does he still have
his sailor's uniform?
436
00:19:42,097 --> 00:19:46,601
Oh, no.
437
00:19:46,768 --> 00:19:47,769
Just has the hat.
438
00:19:47,936 --> 00:19:49,396
Ha ha ha.
439
00:19:57,529 --> 00:20:00,490
I stole my dad's tap!
440
00:20:02,617 --> 00:20:06,830
...back from those thieves.
441
00:20:09,582 --> 00:20:10,750
We were worried sick.
442
00:20:10,917 --> 00:20:12,836
You had us driving
all over town.
443
00:20:13,002 --> 00:20:16,089
We missed
rich man, poor man.
444
00:20:16,256 --> 00:20:17,549
Excuse us, red.
445
00:20:17,716 --> 00:20:18,425
What are you doing?
446
00:20:18,591 --> 00:20:19,426
We're just gonna
grab this keg--
447
00:20:19,592 --> 00:20:22,637
get out of here!
448
00:20:22,804 --> 00:20:24,013
We're not
finished with this.
449
00:20:24,180 --> 00:20:25,932
Neither are we.
450
00:20:26,099 --> 00:20:28,017
Now, you take her home,
and you wait for me.
451
00:20:28,184 --> 00:20:29,310
That's an order.
452
00:20:29,477 --> 00:20:33,189
Ditto.
453
00:20:33,356 --> 00:20:34,941
Come here.
454
00:20:37,694 --> 00:20:40,655
I can't stay mad at you
with that cute face.
455
00:20:48,204 --> 00:20:51,040
Get your ugly butt home.
456
00:20:56,254 --> 00:20:58,298
My dad's gonna kill me.
457
00:20:58,465 --> 00:21:00,341
You're always
saying that.
458
00:21:00,508 --> 00:21:03,762
Yeah, well,
this time he's gonna kill me.
459
00:21:03,928 --> 00:21:06,890
I mean, I cut class,
460
00:21:07,056 --> 00:21:08,516
I trespassed,
461
00:21:08,683 --> 00:21:10,226
I had stolen beer,
462
00:21:10,393 --> 00:21:11,936
and then I swung
into a pool full of cops
463
00:21:12,103 --> 00:21:16,107
on a garden hose
carrying my dad's tap.
464
00:21:16,274 --> 00:21:18,234
Yeah, that was so cool.
465
00:21:20,028 --> 00:21:22,572
Really?
466
00:21:22,739 --> 00:21:26,075
Really.
467
00:21:31,289 --> 00:21:34,375
You looked dangerous.
468
00:21:34,542 --> 00:21:38,880
Did I mention that
I killed a guy in algebra?
469
00:21:39,047 --> 00:21:41,132
Good night.
470
00:21:41,299 --> 00:21:43,802
Killer.
471
00:21:48,097 --> 00:21:50,809
Bring it on, red.
472
00:21:56,898 --> 00:21:59,359
[Drunkenly]
I--i love that boy.
473
00:21:59,526 --> 00:22:01,277
Eric's a good kid.
474
00:22:01,444 --> 00:22:03,154
That Donna's
real sweet, too.
475
00:22:03,321 --> 00:22:05,657
Man, that Donna's
real hot.
476
00:22:05,824 --> 00:22:06,866
Hey,
that's my daughter.
477
00:22:07,033 --> 00:22:07,617
I'm just saying--
478
00:22:07,784 --> 00:22:09,327
you don't think
I know what you're saying?
479
00:22:09,494 --> 00:22:11,871
All right, Bob, it's time to go.
We'll just, uh--
480
00:22:12,038 --> 00:22:15,917
hey, hey, hey!
Get outta here.
481
00:22:16,084 --> 00:22:20,755
All right. Fine.
482
00:22:20,779 --> 00:22:25,779
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