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1
00:00:13,100 --> 00:00:16,087
- Howdy-ho, you South Parketeers.
- Howdy-ho!
2
00:00:16,267 --> 00:00:19,714
- I'm rootin'-tootin' Trey.
- I'm pistol-slinging Matt.
3
00:00:19,894 --> 00:00:23,830
- This here's Scratch. Say hi, fella.
- Hi, Scratch!
4
00:00:24,001 --> 00:00:29,026
We're right excited about this next
episode because it's our favorite one.
5
00:00:29,196 --> 00:00:32,962
It's called "Starvin' Marvin,"
and it aired on Thanksgiving.
6
00:00:33,134 --> 00:00:36,960
In it, the boys celebrate
the holiday with a visitor.
7
00:00:37,131 --> 00:00:40,997
When Comedy Central asked us
to do a Thanksgiving special...
8
00:00:41,167 --> 00:00:46,192
...my first thought was, "I'd like
to have sex with Jennifer Aniston."
9
00:00:46,404 --> 00:00:51,958
Cup her perky breasts in my hands and
put my hand on her nice, tight buns.
10
00:00:52,169 --> 00:00:55,365
This episode teaches
racial tolerance...
11
00:00:55,535 --> 00:00:59,131
...to treat everyone equally,
regardless of skin color.
12
00:00:59,303 --> 00:01:03,359
It's our Indian friend
Indian Companion. Say hi, kids.
13
00:01:03,539 --> 00:01:08,474
- What's happening, Indian Companion?
- Something coming. Grizzly bear.
14
00:01:08,646 --> 00:01:14,301
Why don't you go over and kick him
in the balls? Grizzly bears like that.
15
00:01:16,080 --> 00:01:17,867
- Dumb-ass.
- He's so stupid.
16
00:01:18,078 --> 00:01:21,665
Y'all sit back and have
a rootin'-tootin' good time...
17
00:01:21,845 --> 00:01:24,571
...with "Starvin' Marvin." Yee-haw!
18
00:01:26,882 --> 00:01:29,279
Hooray!
19
00:02:01,485 --> 00:02:03,312
Starvin' Marvin
20
00:02:06,991 --> 00:02:10,817
- That was awesome.
- Would you boys like Cheesy Poofs?
21
00:02:10,987 --> 00:02:14,213
Move! The Terrance & Phillip
Thanksgiving Special is on.
22
00:02:14,384 --> 00:02:16,652
- Sure.
- Yeah, we want Cheesy Poofs.
23
00:02:16,822 --> 00:02:20,258
Terrance, looks like a good place
to start a colony.
24
00:02:20,420 --> 00:02:24,586
It sure does, Phillip. No one
will repress our religion here.
25
00:02:27,424 --> 00:02:31,150
- You stained my hat!
- Did you see that? That was sweet.
26
00:02:31,331 --> 00:02:35,957
Coming up next on the special,
Phillip farts on Terrance and laughs.
27
00:02:36,128 --> 00:02:38,385
- Cool!
- Now a word from our sponsor.
28
00:02:38,566 --> 00:02:43,961
In Africa, children are dying, not
from disease or war but from hunger.
29
00:02:44,131 --> 00:02:47,887
I'm Sally Struthers.
These children are in desperate need.
30
00:02:48,069 --> 00:02:50,526
- Who's that fat chick?
- Sally Struthers.
31
00:02:50,696 --> 00:02:52,254
She was on Full House.
32
00:02:52,435 --> 00:02:56,291
Here in the middle of Africa,
food is extremely scarce.
33
00:02:56,462 --> 00:02:58,949
She's not having
trouble finding food.
34
00:02:59,129 --> 00:03:01,686
- She's fatter than Cartman.
- Yeah. Hey!
35
00:03:01,868 --> 00:03:07,163
- Just $5 a month can sponsor a child.
- That's stupid. Who'd want to do that?
36
00:03:07,334 --> 00:03:12,269
Sponsor now, and we'll send you
a Teiko sports watch as a free gift.
37
00:03:12,439 --> 00:03:14,726
- Kick-ass!
- Sweet!
38
00:03:14,937 --> 00:03:19,333
- I know my mom's credit-card number.
- Is it waterproof?
39
00:03:19,504 --> 00:03:23,230
- Hello, is this Sally Struthers?
- What did she say?
40
00:03:23,401 --> 00:03:25,958
- Shut up, butt pirate!
- Ass-rammer.
41
00:03:26,139 --> 00:03:30,625
- We wanna adopt a starving Ethernopian.
- When do we get the watch?
42
00:03:30,805 --> 00:03:33,792
- Just a second, fat-ass!
- You vas deferens.
43
00:03:34,143 --> 00:03:37,070
Hello? No, it's a... Vas deferens?
44
00:03:40,238 --> 00:03:44,574
- Ask if we get the watch right away.
- Do we get the watch right away?
45
00:03:44,744 --> 00:03:46,232
- She says we do.
- Cool.
46
00:03:46,413 --> 00:03:48,031
I get to wear it first.
47
00:03:49,911 --> 00:03:54,276
- I can't wait to get our Teiko watch.
- But I get to wear it first.
48
00:03:54,447 --> 00:03:59,772
To honor this special time of year,
we'll be doing a canned-food drive.
49
00:03:59,982 --> 00:04:03,778
Anybody know what a
canned-food drive is? Yes, Eric.
50
00:04:03,950 --> 00:04:07,676
When they cut up a chick's stomach
to get a baby out?
51
00:04:07,846 --> 00:04:09,673
That's a cesarean section.
52
00:04:09,845 --> 00:04:14,041
That's okay. There are no stupid
questions, just stupid people.
53
00:04:14,211 --> 00:04:19,146
It's when we collect food for people
who can't afford food on Thanksgiving.
54
00:04:19,317 --> 00:04:21,474
- You mean like Kenny?
- Exactly.
55
00:04:21,656 --> 00:04:25,782
Mr. Garrison, why do poor people
always smell like sour milk?
56
00:04:25,982 --> 00:04:28,708
I don't know, Eric. They just do.
57
00:04:29,250 --> 00:04:31,947
I want everyone
to bring a can of food.
58
00:04:32,118 --> 00:04:37,053
The mayor will divide it up amongst
Kenny's family and other poor people.
59
00:04:37,223 --> 00:04:41,978
- I won't bring food. Screw them!
- How about helping the less fortunate?
60
00:04:42,160 --> 00:04:46,456
Do you hear something?
I think I hear flower children calling.
61
00:04:46,656 --> 00:04:51,092
This is the one time of year
to care about people who can't eat.
62
00:04:51,262 --> 00:04:55,777
Isn't it enough that I pay taxes?
What about the poorhouses I pay for?
63
00:04:55,959 --> 00:04:58,426
Many would rather die than go there.
64
00:04:58,597 --> 00:05:01,524
They should,
and decrease the population.
65
00:05:01,695 --> 00:05:04,092
That's enough Dickens for one day.
66
00:05:04,262 --> 00:05:07,988
- On with our lesson, right, Mr. Hat?
- Right, Mr. Garrison.
67
00:05:08,160 --> 00:05:13,025
Engelbert Humperdinck was the first
man on the moon. Who was the second?
68
00:05:16,863 --> 00:05:18,991
What the hell is going on?
69
00:05:28,063 --> 00:05:30,120
You don't see that every day.
70
00:05:32,071 --> 00:05:35,357
Now, once we have all
the canned foods collected...
71
00:05:35,568 --> 00:05:38,624
...we'll need some clever way
to distribute them to the poor.
72
00:05:38,805 --> 00:05:41,062
It should be something festive.
73
00:05:41,234 --> 00:05:43,931
Mayor, we've got a very big problem.
74
00:05:44,101 --> 00:05:47,038
You're that insane
genetic engineer, right?
75
00:05:47,199 --> 00:05:49,925
Yes, and I may have made
a horrible mistake.
76
00:05:50,106 --> 00:05:54,191
I was genetically engineering
turkeys for Thanksgiving...
77
00:05:54,373 --> 00:05:56,501
...to provide food for the needy.
78
00:05:56,772 --> 00:05:59,968
Something went wrong,
the turkeys broke free.
79
00:06:00,138 --> 00:06:03,535
The worst part is,
they're really pissed off.
80
00:06:03,736 --> 00:06:05,294
Naturally.
81
00:06:06,844 --> 00:06:07,933
Oh, do go on.
82
00:06:08,142 --> 00:06:12,597
We have to stop them, or they could
destroy everything. Time is short.
83
00:06:15,408 --> 00:06:19,244
- You were saying?
- They act normal, but they're evil.
84
00:06:19,414 --> 00:06:21,072
Oh, my.
85
00:06:25,310 --> 00:06:29,336
- You're not taking me seriously.
- Why would you say that?
86
00:06:31,845 --> 00:06:33,503
- Did it come?
- Is it here?
87
00:06:33,683 --> 00:06:36,110
I get to use it first, you guys.
88
00:06:36,410 --> 00:06:40,905
- Did our digital sports watch come?
- Not yet, hon.
89
00:06:41,117 --> 00:06:43,105
- Damn.
- Hey, look, you guys.
90
00:06:43,285 --> 00:06:47,911
Now back to part two of The Terrance
& Phillip Thanksgiving Special.
91
00:06:48,081 --> 00:06:51,208
- I sure am cold, Phillip.
- Yes, and hungry too.
92
00:06:51,389 --> 00:06:56,544
- Being a pilgrim totally sucks ass.
- Gosh, I hope we don't starve.
93
00:06:57,454 --> 00:06:58,712
A squeaker!
94
00:07:03,690 --> 00:07:06,377
The digital sports watch is here!
95
00:07:10,084 --> 00:07:11,242
What the hell?
96
00:07:11,453 --> 00:07:16,008
- That's not a digital sports watch.
- It looks like an Etheropian.
97
00:07:16,190 --> 00:07:19,457
They accidentally sent him
instead of the watch.
98
00:07:19,627 --> 00:07:23,553
Maybe they took it literally
when we said we'd adopt a kid.
99
00:07:24,663 --> 00:07:28,110
- That was cool.
- How'd he make those clicking sounds?
100
00:07:28,290 --> 00:07:30,017
What's your name, dude?
101
00:07:30,229 --> 00:07:34,385
- I think he said his name is Marvin.
- Yeah, Starvin' Marvin.
102
00:07:34,565 --> 00:07:36,283
Nice to meet you.
103
00:07:36,463 --> 00:07:38,250
- Hey, Mom.
- Yes, hon?
104
00:07:38,432 --> 00:07:41,018
We found an Etheropian.
Can we keep him?
105
00:07:41,200 --> 00:07:43,786
- Sure, hon.
- Sweet.
106
00:07:44,628 --> 00:07:48,794
- Let's bring him to school.
- I want you to meet my brother.
107
00:07:48,964 --> 00:07:50,931
He's my son. I adopted him.
108
00:07:51,093 --> 00:07:53,690
- It was my mom's card.
- We'll switch off.
109
00:07:53,861 --> 00:07:56,857
He'll stay here.
Then with Stan, then me.
110
00:07:57,028 --> 00:08:00,964
- Not with Kenny. His family's too poor.
- Totally.
111
00:08:03,003 --> 00:08:07,428
Look how the leaves fall so delicately
on the surface of the pond.
112
00:08:07,630 --> 00:08:09,357
It's so beautiful.
113
00:08:09,568 --> 00:08:12,365
Not as beautiful as you.
114
00:08:17,033 --> 00:08:20,869
Darling, look. Thanksgiving turkeys.
115
00:08:21,069 --> 00:08:23,036
They're so beautiful.
116
00:08:23,238 --> 00:08:25,165
Not as beautiful as you.
117
00:08:25,506 --> 00:08:30,801
Look at the way they foam at the mouth
like beautiful suds of beer.
118
00:08:31,001 --> 00:08:33,129
Not as beautiful as...
119
00:08:40,144 --> 00:08:42,870
This is a great way
to experience America.
120
00:08:43,042 --> 00:08:45,369
This is an all-you-can-eat buffet.
121
00:08:45,540 --> 00:08:50,306
You can eat all you want for $6.99.
That's why we all come on Tuesdays.
122
00:08:50,477 --> 00:08:54,603
Except for Kenny's family.
To them, $6.99 is two years' income.
123
00:08:55,113 --> 00:08:58,839
Why is your family poor?
Is your dad an alcoholic too?
124
00:09:00,248 --> 00:09:04,114
You see, Starvin' Marvin,
these are called appetizers.
125
00:09:04,276 --> 00:09:05,334
Appetizer.
126
00:09:05,515 --> 00:09:09,840
This is what you eat before you eat
to make you more hungry.
127
00:09:10,380 --> 00:09:13,407
Food's here.
That's it for the appetizers.
128
00:09:17,385 --> 00:09:19,682
No, that's my potpie.
129
00:09:19,854 --> 00:09:23,151
This is the time of year
you're supposed to share.
130
00:09:23,321 --> 00:09:26,308
You're right.
You gonna eat your cobbler?
131
00:09:26,488 --> 00:09:30,673
No, you don't want all that.
Why don't you share it with me?
132
00:09:30,855 --> 00:09:32,943
Let me just have some of that.
133
00:09:35,691 --> 00:09:39,447
I'm a little disappointed
in your Thanksgiving spirit.
134
00:09:39,618 --> 00:09:43,214
Only a few cans have been donated
to our food drive.
135
00:09:43,385 --> 00:09:46,911
And can't we do a little better
than creamed corn...
136
00:09:47,122 --> 00:09:49,589
...creamed corn and creamed corn?
137
00:09:50,889 --> 00:09:52,856
Bring in more diverse food...
138
00:09:53,057 --> 00:09:57,183
...or else Kenny's family will have
a pretty corny Thanksgiving.
139
00:10:03,789 --> 00:10:06,086
Corny Thanksgiving!
140
00:10:07,656 --> 00:10:12,182
Anyway, some of you have brought
something special for show-and-tell.
141
00:10:12,362 --> 00:10:13,880
- Yeah.
- Yeah, we did.
142
00:10:14,091 --> 00:10:17,358
All right, boys.
Show us what you've brought.
143
00:10:17,728 --> 00:10:22,093
This is our new Ethernopian:
Starvin' Marvin.
144
00:10:22,494 --> 00:10:25,891
He can do cool stuff
with his voice. Show them.
145
00:10:26,062 --> 00:10:29,359
No, Starvin' Marvin,
that's Kenny's creamed corn.
146
00:10:29,570 --> 00:10:31,827
That's a bad Starvin' Marvin!
147
00:10:32,037 --> 00:10:35,553
What the hell are you doing?
This is horribly wrong.
148
00:10:35,735 --> 00:10:39,671
- How did you get him?
- He came instead of the sports watch.
149
00:10:39,832 --> 00:10:42,359
- From the commercial?
- Yeah, that one.
150
00:10:42,539 --> 00:10:44,656
- I want a Starvin' Marvin.
- Me too.
151
00:10:44,838 --> 00:10:47,855
- Yes, I'll pay $50 for one.
- I want one!
152
00:10:48,105 --> 00:10:50,792
You're too young to take care of him.
153
00:10:50,973 --> 00:10:54,059
I'll call the Red Cross
and have him returned.
154
00:10:54,240 --> 00:10:56,667
We shouldn't have brought him here.
155
00:10:57,168 --> 00:11:00,964
Thank you very much.
You can pick him up tonight. Bye.
156
00:11:01,135 --> 00:11:04,001
- I hope you've learned your lesson.
- No.
157
00:11:04,172 --> 00:11:07,659
- You can't care for him.
- I thought we were supposed to.
158
00:11:07,839 --> 00:11:10,666
But you don't get involved
with the child.
159
00:11:10,837 --> 00:11:13,743
You send money,
and they write you a letter.
160
00:11:13,905 --> 00:11:17,072
He didn't grow up
in a normal place like here.
161
00:11:17,242 --> 00:11:20,039
- Why can't he live here now?
- Because he can't.
162
00:11:20,210 --> 00:11:23,576
- Because why?
- Because 8-year-olds can't be parents!
163
00:11:23,747 --> 00:11:27,234
- Then you take care of him.
- I can't. I'm very busy.
164
00:11:28,483 --> 00:11:30,640
I send my $5 a month, see?
165
00:11:30,942 --> 00:11:35,177
- This sucks, he's our friend.
- Back to the poor country with you.
166
00:11:35,378 --> 00:11:39,334
Watch what you say.
You might be poor and hungry someday.
167
00:11:39,515 --> 00:11:40,504
Yeah, right.
168
00:11:42,752 --> 00:11:45,909
I knew you were
the only person who'd listen.
169
00:11:46,120 --> 00:11:50,076
Let's get it over with.
This gives me the booboo-jeebies.
170
00:11:50,286 --> 00:11:54,112
Look here in my microscope.
Tell me what you see.
171
00:11:54,683 --> 00:11:57,150
I see an extreme close-up...
172
00:11:57,351 --> 00:12:00,677
...of Vanessa Redgrave's
private parts.
173
00:12:01,687 --> 00:12:04,154
Now tell me what you see.
174
00:12:04,356 --> 00:12:05,914
Well, I'm no biologist...
175
00:12:06,085 --> 00:12:09,541
...but it looks like turkey DNA.
- Precisely.
176
00:12:09,721 --> 00:12:12,947
- Look how rapidly it's dividing.
- What's it mean?
177
00:12:13,119 --> 00:12:15,886
The turkeys are growing exponentially.
178
00:12:16,086 --> 00:12:19,852
If we don't destroy them,
they'll take over the town.
179
00:12:20,024 --> 00:12:23,151
- Maybe the world.
- Oh, fudge!
180
00:12:23,461 --> 00:12:27,088
Let me see that
Vanessa Redgrave thing again.
181
00:12:27,288 --> 00:12:28,516
Sure.
182
00:12:32,993 --> 00:12:35,960
We're looking for
a starving African child...
183
00:12:36,161 --> 00:12:40,486
...who was accidentally sent here
instead of a Teiko sports watch.
184
00:12:46,463 --> 00:12:49,450
Hey, what's going on? Let go of me!
185
00:12:49,660 --> 00:12:51,717
I'll kick you in the nuts!
186
00:12:51,929 --> 00:12:55,416
Here's your sports watch, son.
Sorry for the mix-up.
187
00:12:56,535 --> 00:12:58,893
Now you're pissing me off!
188
00:12:59,103 --> 00:13:00,761
Sweet.
189
00:13:04,529 --> 00:13:08,624
- So how does this thing work?
- It's based on the cash grab.
190
00:13:08,835 --> 00:13:11,732
Instead of money,
cans are in the capsule.
191
00:13:11,903 --> 00:13:14,800
The pov catches as many as he can.
192
00:13:14,970 --> 00:13:17,727
- "Pov"?
- Poverty stricken citizen.
193
00:13:17,938 --> 00:13:19,765
Oh, brilliant.
194
00:13:25,342 --> 00:13:28,428
- What the hell is this?
- I don't know, mayor.
195
00:13:28,610 --> 00:13:32,166
- It's not on the program.
- They're increasing in number.
196
00:13:32,337 --> 00:13:35,134
These are the turkeys
I warned you about.
197
00:13:35,345 --> 00:13:40,640
It's true, mayor. Those turkeys
just ripped apart my cafeteria.
198
00:13:40,941 --> 00:13:43,498
You won't get away
with this, you bastards!
199
00:13:43,679 --> 00:13:46,106
Those are some pissed off turkeys.
200
00:13:46,546 --> 00:13:51,561
Okay, people, don't panic!
Bring out the defense squad!
201
00:13:57,048 --> 00:14:01,004
We need more than that.
They'll come back in larger numbers.
202
00:14:02,743 --> 00:14:06,240
- Phillip, could you pass the beans?
- Beans?
203
00:14:06,410 --> 00:14:10,006
Looks like we'll be at war
with these Indians soon.
204
00:14:10,848 --> 00:14:12,575
Wait, wait, wait.
205
00:14:12,746 --> 00:14:14,374
Here it comes.
206
00:14:16,413 --> 00:14:18,710
I crapped in my pants!
207
00:14:18,881 --> 00:14:22,337
I think you got some spat
on Chief Running Wolf.
208
00:14:22,518 --> 00:14:26,314
I spatted his face.
Now he's a smelly Indian.
209
00:14:26,714 --> 00:14:30,111
We'll be back to part 1 4
of Terrance & Phillip...
210
00:14:30,322 --> 00:14:31,380
...right after this.
211
00:14:31,551 --> 00:14:34,518
Hunger is an enemy
that we all must fight.
212
00:14:34,718 --> 00:14:37,875
These children desperately
need your support.
213
00:14:38,056 --> 00:14:40,642
Somebody get me out of here!
This sucks!
214
00:14:40,824 --> 00:14:43,811
So please call
and adopt a child today.
215
00:14:43,991 --> 00:14:46,418
I'm seriously getting pissed off!
216
00:14:46,790 --> 00:14:50,816
- You want more Cheesy Poofs?
- Yeah, I want the Cheesy Poofs.
217
00:14:50,986 --> 00:14:51,975
Okay.
218
00:14:52,195 --> 00:14:53,782
Sweet.
219
00:14:54,553 --> 00:14:56,181
This is serious bullsh *t!
220
00:14:56,362 --> 00:14:59,659
There has to be a Happy Burger
around here.
221
00:14:59,829 --> 00:15:04,415
Excuse me, I am a lost little boy.
Could you help me?
222
00:15:06,524 --> 00:15:08,512
Well, screw you too!
223
00:15:08,732 --> 00:15:13,527
Who let these flies in here? Hasn't
anybody heard of insect repellent?
224
00:15:15,197 --> 00:15:20,561
All right, everyone, it's time
to give out canned food to the poor.
225
00:15:23,031 --> 00:15:25,159
- Where's Cartman?
- I don't know.
226
00:15:25,329 --> 00:15:27,296
Do you know where he is?
227
00:15:27,498 --> 00:15:31,364
Looks like we have
the turkey problem under control.
228
00:15:31,564 --> 00:15:37,158
It's time to embrace the spirit
of giving with the canned-food grab.
229
00:15:38,539 --> 00:15:40,226
Come on, hurry up.
230
00:15:44,834 --> 00:15:46,302
Grab a lot, son.
231
00:15:46,872 --> 00:15:50,129
Happy, happy Thanksgiving.
Let her rip!
232
00:15:53,407 --> 00:15:56,664
Come on, grab those cans, little boy!
233
00:15:59,902 --> 00:16:02,569
- Come on, Kenny!
- Come on, son!
234
00:16:05,338 --> 00:16:10,773
Now, let's see all the goodies you're
going to take home to your family.
235
00:16:11,613 --> 00:16:16,338
It looks like he got
a can of string beans.
236
00:16:21,176 --> 00:16:24,872
- What the...?
- Dude, the mutant turkeys are back.
237
00:16:30,109 --> 00:16:34,474
Okay, people, move along.
Nothing to see here, you looky-Ioos.
238
00:16:34,685 --> 00:16:39,670
- I told you, but you didn't listen.
- Gather around and listen good.
239
00:16:39,882 --> 00:16:42,869
Go to your homes and arm your...
240
00:16:48,584 --> 00:16:53,539
- What the hell are you supposed to be?
- That's not important right now.
241
00:16:53,720 --> 00:16:57,916
What's this thing supposed to be?
It doesn't look like anything.
242
00:16:58,117 --> 00:17:00,444
- Chef, the turkeys.
- All right.
243
00:17:00,655 --> 00:17:02,882
Listen up and listen good.
244
00:17:03,054 --> 00:17:07,210
Go to your homes and arm yourselves
with whatever you can.
245
00:17:07,390 --> 00:17:10,977
We'll meet back here
in 1 5 minutes. Hurry.
246
00:17:12,526 --> 00:17:16,711
We won't let our Thanksgiving
be ruined by a bunch of turkeys.
247
00:17:19,261 --> 00:17:21,318
Dang, you guys.
248
00:17:21,529 --> 00:17:23,816
Seriously, I'm hungry.
249
00:17:24,027 --> 00:17:25,614
I have to eat.
250
00:17:26,295 --> 00:17:27,982
Sweet, the Red Cross.
251
00:17:28,193 --> 00:17:31,749
I'll have fried chicken
and mashed potatoes, please.
252
00:17:31,960 --> 00:17:35,186
Sorry, we're out of food.
We ran out of funding.
253
00:17:35,358 --> 00:17:39,194
We couldn't get enough sponsors,
so we gotta pack it up.
254
00:17:39,365 --> 00:17:42,122
I'm not an Ethernopian.
I gotta get home!
255
00:17:42,333 --> 00:17:47,128
Sorry, we just don't have any funds.
Here, have a Teiko sports watch.
256
00:17:49,427 --> 00:17:51,055
Weak!
257
00:17:51,265 --> 00:17:57,129
People, we all have to do our part
against the evil turkeys.
258
00:17:57,331 --> 00:17:59,818
- There's too many of them.
- Come on.
259
00:18:00,029 --> 00:18:04,434
- Where is that Thanksgiving spirit?
- We can't stop them.
260
00:18:07,833 --> 00:18:10,770
Today, you fight for your city.
261
00:18:10,971 --> 00:18:13,059
You fight for your honor.
262
00:18:13,268 --> 00:18:15,755
These turkeys will continue to push...
263
00:18:15,967 --> 00:18:19,403
...until they have taken
everything from us.
264
00:18:19,704 --> 00:18:24,869
These fudged-up turkeys from the
crustaceous era can take our lives...
265
00:18:25,070 --> 00:18:29,026
...but they can never take
our freedom!
266
00:18:51,679 --> 00:18:52,977
Here you go, turkeys.
267
00:18:59,543 --> 00:19:01,410
Does my hair look okay?
268
00:19:04,449 --> 00:19:06,776
Can't go on.
269
00:19:06,947 --> 00:19:09,344
Need appetizer.
270
00:19:11,013 --> 00:19:15,069
I'm sorry, God.
I'm sorry I mocked poor people.
271
00:19:15,280 --> 00:19:17,807
I'm sorry I wasn't more sensitive.
272
00:19:18,018 --> 00:19:19,246
Please.
273
00:19:19,447 --> 00:19:21,345
Please, God.
274
00:19:26,522 --> 00:19:29,309
My God has forsaken me.
275
00:19:41,120 --> 00:19:43,177
I wonder what's in here?
276
00:19:48,755 --> 00:19:50,743
Snacky Cakes!
277
00:19:58,927 --> 00:20:01,914
- Sally Struthers?
- Who the hell are you?
278
00:20:02,123 --> 00:20:05,559
- Give me that cake!
- No, this is my cake.
279
00:20:05,761 --> 00:20:09,917
- Sally Struthers, give me that cake.
- No, you can't have any.
280
00:20:16,962 --> 00:20:20,558
You guys, Sally Struthers is
holding food from us!
281
00:20:37,966 --> 00:20:39,364
Stay close, children.
282
00:20:49,567 --> 00:20:53,233
- Oh, my God, they've killed Kenny!
- You bastards!
283
00:20:53,404 --> 00:20:56,371
The last three are getting away!
Shoot them!
284
00:20:57,571 --> 00:21:01,058
- We did it!
- My God, what have we done?
285
00:21:01,268 --> 00:21:02,966
We've saved Thanksgiving.
286
00:21:03,137 --> 00:21:06,034
But those poor turkeys,
they're all dead.
287
00:21:06,204 --> 00:21:10,070
Every turkey dies.
Not every turkey truly lives.
288
00:21:10,271 --> 00:21:13,637
As horrible as they were,
they felt like a part of me.
289
00:21:13,808 --> 00:21:18,244
Perhaps I shouldn't toy with
God's creations. Perhaps I should...
290
00:21:19,344 --> 00:21:22,271
We're looking for
a starving Ethiopian boy...
291
00:21:22,442 --> 00:21:25,739
...who was accidentally delivered
instead of a Teiko sports watch.
292
00:21:25,908 --> 00:21:27,936
Have you seen anyone like this?
293
00:21:28,117 --> 00:21:32,302
That could be a hundred kids
in this town, mister.
294
00:21:33,143 --> 00:21:36,369
There you are.
Are you ready to go home now?
295
00:21:46,713 --> 00:21:50,948
- It sucks he has to leave.
- I like him a lot more than Cartman.
296
00:21:51,119 --> 00:21:53,086
I've learned something today.
297
00:21:53,248 --> 00:21:57,444
It's easy not to think of images
on TV as real, but they are.
298
00:21:57,614 --> 00:22:03,208
That's why it's easy to ignore those
commercials, but people on TV are real.
299
00:22:03,390 --> 00:22:05,617
That means MacGyver's real too.
300
00:22:05,788 --> 00:22:10,613
We're terribly sorry about the mix-up.
We'll get you home immediately.
301
00:22:10,824 --> 00:22:14,840
That's right, you will.
Move it povs, I'm an American!
302
00:22:40,631 --> 00:22:44,617
Lord, on this day of thanks,
we extend our deepest gratitude...
303
00:22:44,797 --> 00:22:49,252
...for this incredible bounty of green
beans you have bestowed upon us.
304
00:22:49,993 --> 00:22:54,448
Though you, for some reason, found it
necessary to take our son...
305
00:22:54,630 --> 00:22:58,496
...and though you find pleasure
in watching us suffer...
306
00:22:58,696 --> 00:23:00,893
...still, we give thanks. Amen.
307
00:23:01,064 --> 00:23:02,392
Amen.
308
00:23:03,363 --> 00:23:06,799
Does anybody have a can opener?
309
00:23:07,000 --> 00:23:08,587
Goddamn it.
24466
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