All language subtitles for eubarry.Good.Sports.with.Kevin.Hart.and.Kenan.Thompson.S01E05

(Transcrito por TurboScribe.ai. Atualize para Ilimitado para remover esta mensagem.) The NFL playoffs are here and two things are certain, the Rams will be passing and the

Bears will be rushing.

Oh wait, Kenny, you forgot one more.

And the Falcons will be watching.

Boom!

Oh, you son of a...

Welcome to Good Sports, the show that's half sports, half comedy, and half talk.

Damn, I suck at fractions.

Ladies and gentlemen, I'm Kevin Hart.

I'm Kenny Thompson.

Did you have a good holiday break, Kev?

Did I?

Yes, man.

I had an amazing holiday break.

I sat course out with the family at a Lakers game.

You know, we went to Aspen.

Went to Aspen.

I did a little snowboarding.

That's nice.

And skiing.

I celebrated my Golden Globe nominations.

Congratulations on that, man.

Yeah, yeah, yeah.

That was awesome.

That was cool, man.

A lot.

I had a lot going on.

What'd you do, Kenny?

It's actually pretty messed up, yeah.

I saw vandalism, cannibalism, and even public execution.

I'm sorry, Kenny, what?

I'm sorry, what?

What'd you say?

Yeah, I watched the Pop-Tarts, baby.

Oh, okay.

Got it.

I'm never going to be the same.

Got it.

I don't know what flavor that is, but why are we grilling Pop-Tarts?

BYU, I hope you guys are hungry.

Where you going?

Oh, no.

Let's toast those mascots.

Cookies and cream.

Cherry.

It's about 400 calories in that mouthful.

You know, if there was any time that I could get back in my life, I would have to go back

I would ask for those 20 seconds right there, like, what the fuck are we watching?

Can you imagine being in the audience, and they're screaming, put them in the toaster!

And then eat some.

Eat that, eat that Pop-Tart!

Eat that Pop-Tart!

What school was that?

Yeah, who was ever playing?

What school?

Who was playing in that game?

BYU.

Oh, BYU.

Oh, oh, oh.

The Mormons.

Got it, got it, got it.

BYU.

Big game.

Big, big game.

All right, let's get into it.

Out the gate.

Out the gate.

Oh, my, we're starting off with a bang, people.

The Steelers had a miraculous win on Sunday night when the Ravens missed the last second

field goal.

And this might be why.

This is a priest who's spreading holy water in that end zone.

The Catholic community in Pittsburgh is very strong, and the sighs to the Steelers are

everywhere.

This reminds me of a joke.

A priest, a shaman, and an asshole walk onto a field.

The bartender says, what can I get for you, Aaron Rodgers?

All right, this week, Browns Edge rusher Miles Garrett broke the single-season sack record.

Yes, he did.

Yes, he did.

Congratulations, man.

Congrats.

We salute you, Miles.

And the best part is, your dad was at the game to see it.

And there's his dad, Lawrence, who is a photographer himself.

Miles has the hobby of photography as well.

He's got a professional.

That's better than what we got, I think.

That is a thing of beauty right there.

Wow.

I guess we know what he got for Christmas.

I don't know.

Yeah, we know.

My son got me this.

I can't bring in a fanny pack or an umbrella into the stadium, but this guy can come in

with the Hubble telescope.

That ain't fair.

He's either taking pictures, or he's looking at Saturn's rings.

I don't know what he's doing, man.

He's definitely not looking at the Browns' rings, because they ain't got none.

No, no, no.

Goddamn right, they ain't got none.

All right, people, prepare yourselves for the worst rushing attempt by an NFL running

back in over three decades.

A journey it's been, the two-time pro bowler.

Ah, come on.

Ah, get off.

Come on, now.

I got you.

No, no.

This is a bad idea.

All of this is bad.

I got it, coach.

I got it.

Coach.

Oh, my God.

His wife was like, Emmanuel, next time you need to ask for directions.

That's right.

Because that's what wives be saying.

No, I got it.

You know what I'm saying?

No, I got it when you said it.

I got it.

That's what wives be saying.

Do it again.

Do it again.

All right, hold on.

Say it again.

One more time.

Yeah.

This one going to hit.

Watch.

His wife was like, Emmanuel, next time you need to ask for directions.

That's what it was.

That's what it was.

Devin Booker is one of the greatest shooting guards to play for the Phoenix Suns.

Even when things get a little dark in the paint, he finds a way to shine where the suns don't.

Gets the drive, gets control of the ball.

Oh, look at that.

Wow.

Wow.

See that?

Usually you got to go to an airport bathroom to get this kind of action.

You know, being a hockey goalie is one of the toughest jobs in sports.

Let's see how two professionals prepare at the highest level.

Includes visualization on the bench and so does Dustin Wolfe.

So clearly it works for him.

And Wolfe is the flames present and future and goal.

They were both on their benches for five or six minutes.

That's how I look when I pretend to be reading the script.

That's good.

Yeah, yeah, yeah.

That's good.

Yeah.

This is me.

This is me getting ready for a field sobriety test.

Here you go.

I can't walk on that line.

Ain't nobody had too much of nothing.

Look at my eyes.

Despite beating UConn 41-16 in their bowl game,

the Army players struggled to dump Gatorade on their own coach.

Y'all better get your ass out of here.

Y'all don't get me.

I don't fuck with the code.

I told y'all that.

Y'all don't fuck with the code.

No, y'all go ahead now.

Y'all slow.

Y'all slow.

Get off of me.

See that?

Huh?

Yeah, this is part of the Army's don't splash, don't tell policy.

Everybody quiet.

Everybody be quiet.

Ain't nobody seen nothing.

Now, before the Armed Forces Bowl,

some paratroopers put on a display of American military dominance.

Oh, now, wait a second.

I'm okay.

I'm okay.

I'm good, though.

Oh, man.

Show one more time.

Show one more time.

The panic just, hey, hey, hey.

Hey, move.

Open up.

Open up.

Move.

Open up.

Down.

Down.

Damn it.

Catch me.

Catch me.

Somebody.

Somebody catch me.

Why are they still doing it?

I don't understand why they're still doing the parachute into the stadium thing.

Like, so many of them don't work.

Is that a thing?

Yeah.

Like, so many of them go completely batshit.

How are you supposed to see that?

It's just bad.

There's, like, one little string that caught them.

Then they got to wait for him to get the whole parachute thing after the accident.

Excuse me.

Excuse me.

I got to get all this.

Excuse me.

Oh, my God.

Talk about bad field position.

That's horrible.

Yeah.

He landed out the back of the end zone, so they placed him on the 25-yard line.

That's all right.

Ladies and gentlemen, that is Carl out the gate.

That's out of the gate.

Our next guest is a three-time Super Bowl champion with the Dallas Cowboys.

That's right.

Last week, his college team, the Miami Hurricanes, got their second win in the college playoff.

Please welcome Michael Irving.

Michael Irving.

Look at him.

Yeah.

Look at him.

Look at him, man.

He look good, don't he?

Hey, what's up, man?

How you doing, Kevin?

I'm good.

How you guys doing, man?

It's great to be on with you guys, man.

Kevin, I haven't seen you since I did that show with you last time in L.A.

Yeah.

On purpose.

Good to see you, bro.

On purpose, man.

I got to start off by telling you Happy New Year, man.

Wishing you and yours a very big and blessed...

I don't subscribe to a happy new year.

I subscribe to the happy you year.

It's the happy you year.

You see what I'm saying?

That's what I'm talking about right there.

The way this thing is going, it's been a happy new year.

We just got to keep it going.

Okay.

Real quick, Mike, just checking for myself.

Is this a you?

That's the you, right?

That's a you?

Yeah.

That's a you.

That is a you.

I came up with this sign.

It's the you.

And I did the commercial after I came up with it on ESPN a long time ago.

And if I ever tell you why I came up with the you,

I was working with Chris Berman and Tom Jackson.

I just got the job.

And I'm driving to my first show.

What time was it?

I always knew.

This was a morning show.

So this is a good drive.

You know what I mean?

It's a good drive.

It was an early morning show.

And I'm thinking about what Chris Berman is going to say,

because you always say to Tom Jackson, where is he from?

Where is he from?

And he says, who am I?

So I did not want to say anything had to do with cane.

Hurricane, cocaine, no kind of cane.

So I said the you.

I started the right thing.

That's smart.

You thinking.

That's smart.

And then the next time I did the commercial,

I came home, we did the commercial.

We were like, this is too small.

This is too much.

But this is just right.

Always know.

Always know.

All about you.

Mike, I'll be honest with you, man.

I feel like we could have got to that a lot sooner, man, in that story.

No, no, no, no, no, no, no, no.

I like that.

After you guys beat Ohio State, man, you got a strange way of celebrating.

No, the belt is off.

Can you explain that?

Explain the thought process.

Well, y'all know, man.

You know, everybody always talking BTA belt to ass.

So the last couple games, everybody, they never give us any opportunity to

win.

And I keep telling them, y'all messing with a bunch of Florida boys.

And down in Florida, we know how, we know how to put BTA because we got BTA

a lot.

You know, when I was doing that, Keenan, what you said is exactly what they

said to Carmen.

You could tell he got his ass whooped when he was a kid.

You can tell he got his ass whooped.

And you can tell he whoops some ass.

So what does Miami need to do to beat Ole Miss this week?

And Ole Miss is an incredible football team.

That quarterback, my yard man today, right?

He was supposed to be fixing the damn sprinklers.

What time was this?

That was about 3.30 this afternoon.

He said to me, he don't know nothing about football.

So I said, Mike, that Ole Miss quarterback looked like Patrick Mahone.

I said, man, fix my damn sprinklers and shut up.

I don't want to hear that from you.

That took a laugh, didn't it?

All right, another question for you.

Is Ole Miss better without Lane Kiffin?

It's hard for me to say you're better without Lane Kiffin because Lane's a

great coach.

But sometimes it's not just about skill.

It's about a collective will.

And when teams come together and say, we'll show the world, we can do it

without Lane Kiffin, I hope they're not better come Thursday when we play.

When you were dominating college football, they weren't paying players.

Do you think that it's only fair that you and others like you get reparations,

or do you feel like you've been taken care of?

No, I don't feel like I've been taken care of.

They cheated me.

They cheated me.

I got $25 on the weekend.

I got 16 brothers and sisters.

They took 16 of those.

So I was left with $9.

Yeah, I got cheated.

I want my money.

If they got it, I want my money.

That's not a bad idea.

We should sue.

That's not a bad idea.

Well, hold on, Mike.

Well, wait a minute, man.

What happened to that?

You're just doing this, man.

Go back to this, man.

I'm talking about sue the whole thing, not just to you.

Oh, okay.

Okay.

Okay.

Okay.

Okay.

Okay.

Okay.

Okay.

Okay.

Hold on.

Hold on.

Hold on.

Hold on.

Mike, you played the bowl games back when they had simple names like the Orange

and the Sugar and the Fiesta, right?

But now there are new bowl game names every single year, and it's hard to tell if they're

real or they made up.

So we put together a list of bowl game names, and you got to decide

if they are real or just some bullshit.

Yeah, that's right.

This is Bowl or Bullshit.

Yes, sir.

All right.

First up, Wasabi Fenway Bowl.

What do you think?

Bowl or Bullshit?

Oh, that's Bullshit.

That's Bullshit.

That's bullshit, I never heard about it, wasabi.

All right, let's see the answer.

That one is, that one's actually real?

That one's actually real.

Yeah, Army beat Connecticut 41 to 16.

Okay, by the way, you can tell that we didn't believe it

because we checked with producers.

Is that real?

Is that real?

Real, okay, all right, okay, got it, got it, got it.

That actually happened.

I definitely thought that was bullshit.

Okay, all right, all right, next we got,

ooh, this is good for me, right?

Look at this right here.

I do well with these.

The Yoshinoya beef bowl.

Come on, man.

What do you think?

You know Yoshinoya.

Oh, is that Yoshinoya?

Yeah, is that what that is?

Hold on, Mike, give us a second

because I have a problem with pronouncing words

that I've never seen.

Let me take another crack at that, okay?

You sure that's Yoshinoya?

Yo.

Oh, Yoshinoya, oh, okay.

You sure?

I thought it was Yoshinoya.

That's my favorite.

I thought it was, okay, I got it.

I got it now.

You know I know it.

Here we go, you ready?

All right, next we got the Yoshinoya beef bowl.

I do love beef paws,

but I'm going to say this is bullshit.

All right, well, let's see the answer.

Let's see the answer right now.

All right, yep, that's it.

Bullshit, that's totally it.

That man knows his bowls, he knows his bowls.

All right, now we got this one here.

The Bush's Best Boca Raton Bowl of Beans.

What you think, Michael?

Bush's best, that bullshit is Boca Raton.

I know about Boca Raton.

I don't think that that's messing with Bush's best.

Uh-huh, yep, yep.

Let's see.

Let's see.

Let's see the answer.

Oh, it's real, it's real.

That one is real.

Louisville beat Toledo 27 to 22.

Yeah.

All right, next we got the Mark Davis Bowl Cut Bowl.

What do we think about that?

That's bullshit right there.

Are you sure?

I don't know, man.

My mom used to take me to that bowl.

I'm familiar with that bowl.

The one they put on your head.

Let's see what happens.

All right, let's see the answer.

That one is fair.

Yes, yes.

Good call, Michael.

I got it, I got it, I got it, I got it.

All right, finally, it's the Plan B.

The Plan B Oopsie Daisy Bowl.

What do you think, Michael?

Is this a real bowl or not, okay?

Well, and with all the brothers that play in football

and all the Plan B that's needed,

I'm gonna call that a real bowl.

Unfortunately, unfortunately it's fake.

It's fake?

Yeah, that was.

It's fake, but I get it.

I get it.

I get what he's saying though.

It should be celebrated.

That was the one bowl that Notre Dame never pulled out of.

Yeah, I got you.

All right, folks, that was Bowl of Bullshit.

Yes, yes, yes, yes, yes.

Thank you so much, Michael.

Yes.

Hey man, Michael, listen, we wanna wish you

and the Hurricanes good luck against the Rebels, man.

Before you go, we will give you the floor

to tell Ole Miss cooler what you got coming for them, okay?

We're gonna give you the floor right now.

Oh, better believe it, right there.

Talk to it.

Right there.

Talk to it.

Let me let them know right now

that this has been a hell of a season

and you guys oughta be proud of all you have accomplished.

But right now, come Thursday afternoon,

I'm gonna need you to bend over and take this belt to ass.

You know what I'm saying?

Yeah.

That's what I'm gonna need.

Yeah, you heard him?

You heard what he said?

You gonna take that belt to ass, you punk bitch.

Yeah, yeah.

That's what I'm saying.

That's it.

Anything else, Mike, or you good?

That's it?

No, no, no.

You can finish it up.

You know how to finish.

Okay, okay.

Well, we'll deal with him when you go, man.

That's right.

Get Mike up out of here.

That's right, man.

Thank you so much for being here, Mr. Playmaker.

Good luck to the U and the Fiesta Bowl.

Thank you so much, Michael Irvin.

We will be right back.

Yes, sir.

Yes, sir, Michael Irvin.

We love you, Mike.

Thank you, man.

This week in sports history.

January 6th, 1994.

At the U.S. Figure Skating Championship in Detroit,

Nancy Kerrigan was stuck with a nightstick.

It wasn't the first time someone was attacked

by a police baton in Detroit,

but it was the first time it happened to a white lady.

And that's important.

That was this week in sports history.

The end of the NFL regular season

also means the end of the NFL Red Zone.

Shout out to Scott Hanson.

But for those who love nonstop scoring action,

don't worry, the NBA is dipping their toe

into the water with Kevin Hart.

Man, do you ever say no to anything?

Okay, will you just hush, man?

Just watch it, please.

Welcome to NBA Splash Zone,

where we bring you every three-pointer,

dunk, block, floater, up and under,

fadeaway, jumper, reverse layup

from every second of every game,

every day of the week.

Let's get wet.

Let's get wet.

Let's start with the Lakers and Clippers.

Now bring up the Mavs and Bulls.

Wait, wait, no, go Nuggets and Pacers.

And OKC and Detroit.

Okay, okay, both of those games in the Splash Zone.

Okay, all right, now go Clippers.

Clippers on a fast break.

Oop, looks like.

Hold on, we just added some more games.

Okay, no, look, we got it, we got it.

No, no, no, we got 16 games in four quarters.

Splash.

Serve from center.

Who just did that?

Okay, we back to Minnesota.

Bottom left.

No, that's not Minnesota, that's Memphis.

Memphis and Minnesota, I get them mixed up

because of the N.

Splash Zone.

Was that Cooper Flag?

Was that Cooper Flag?

Fuck it!

It was Cooper Flag.

Splash Zone.

They're scoring over there,

and they're scoring over, what's that?

Comment in the chat.

Okay, look, if you want to chime in,

then there's a chat.

Is that Bill Walton?

Didn't Bill Walton die?

Who's making a toast?

You're doing it too much.

It's too much happening.

And I told you the idea was stupid in the first place.

It's stupid.

This has been NBA Splash Zone.

Come on, now.

Splash Zone, baby.

I like that, bro.

That's everything.

Everything is happening so fast, man.

Yeah, man, chaos.

All right, the NFL regular season just ended,

and it was nothing short of entertaining,

mostly due to the fans.

Yeah, tonight we like to take a look back

on some of our favorite fan moments from the season.

This is Pandemonium.

Come on, fans.

Now, we've all seen this clip,

but this young man sums up

what being a Jets fan is all about.

Take a look.

I hate this team.

I was born into this, and I'm not gonna ever,

I'm always a Jets fan, but like,

I just, I hate this team.

Yeah, yeah, yeah, got it.

That about sums it up.

It's tough.

Yeah, it's tough.

It's tough on the Jets fans.

It's a hard job.

Yeah, since that interview, they've only gotten worse.

They're true, they're true.

NFL fans would do anything for their team to win,

but this next guy might've taken it a little too far.

And if you think we're talking about his outfit,

wait till you hear about his politics.

What's the craziest thing you would sacrifice

for the Cowboys to win at all?

I don't wanna say this,

because it's crazy,

but probably my family getting deported, man.

That is cold.

Ice cold.

Oh, shit, Keenan.

Come on, man.

I know.

What are you doing, man?

It was right there.

You couldn't leave it there.

I couldn't.

You had to go pick it up anyway.

Oh my goodness.

Yeah.

This guy's wearing a mask and a sombrero.

You know, Chris, here's my question.

How do you dress both like Ice and the people they deport?

How do you do?

We're gonna, we're gonna get canceled.

The last show.

Thanks.

It's been a great ride, everybody.

It's our last show.

That's crazy.

I just gotta point out

that we've watched all these Unhinged Fans clips,

and I haven't seen one Eagles fan.

That's because we're only halfway through the segment.

Why don't we take a look at this next clip?

Why don't we take a look at this next clip?

Woo!

That's right.

Oh, yeah.

Yeah, yeah, yeah.

There you go.

What's up?

What's up, man?

What's up, man?

Good luck today, asshole.

That's right.

That's a child doing that.

Yeah, you know what he said?

He said, go bird.

That's what he said.

Was that you?

Audience haven't laughed that hard all night.

I mean, that was a group laugh at the same time.

Child trying to sing.

No, that's just how we say hello in Philly.

That's all that is.

Now, Eagles fans aren't exactly

the sharpest talons in the claw.

Exhibit A.

E-L-S-E-L-E-G-E-L.

I'm not gonna let y'all tease him

because I know what he spells.

I know what he was trying to spell.

He just took the longer road to get there.

As Eagles.

Damn it.

Thank God this guy isn't a fan of the Buccaneers.

Oh, my.

Did he go to Abbott Elementary?

Come on.

Come on.

Keeney, look, man, this whole thing really starts at the top, okay?

Check out Philly Mayor last year.

E-L-G.

Come on.

That's right.

That's right.

Y'all blamin' the wrong person.

Y'all blamin' the wrong person, okay?

She must be one of the teachers at Abbott Elementary.

That's right.

Yeah.

Kevin, why don't you spell Eagles?

I can spell Eagles.

You don't think I know how to spell it?

Come on.

Okay.

E-A-G-L-E-S.

Eagles!

You already know who that is.

Ladies and gentlemen, that was Phandemonium.

Let's hear it.

All right.

Our next guest is an actor, a producer, a Marvel superhero, and he trains harder than

most professional athletes.

That's right.

He does.

You can watch him in the Copenhagen Tess, streaming on Peacock.

Please welcome my guy, Simu Li.

Let's go.

Simu, we see you.

We see you.

How are you, man?

I'm really good, man.

It's good to see you.

Good to see you as well, man.

Simu, in your new show, you play an intelligence analyst whose eyes and ears get hacked, okay?

I want to know what that means, and I also want to know if I can use that with my wife.

Yeah, that makes sense.

No, you definitely could use it with your wife.

Yeah, so in our show, I play a character.

He gets this nanotechnology embedded in his brain, so it broadcasts everything that he

sees and everything that he hears.

For example, if your wife was hacked, if you hacked your wife, and then you were in bed

with your wife, you could watch it back from her perspective.

I don't want to see that.

And you would just see me, and you would understand a lot more.

I don't want to see that.

Whatever face that you make, you get a nice close-up there.

I definitely don't want to see that.

I don't want that technology at all.

You're a big basketball fan?

Yeah.

You played in that 2023 NBA Celebrity Game.

Let's watch you a little bit in action.

One more time.

Oh, yeah.

Don't give him room.

Hey!

Don't give him room, Mo.

Hey!

That's all right.

No, you got to give that love.

Thank you so much.

I'll be honest, I didn't know what I was going to see, and I didn't expect to see that.

I did not expect to see that.

It's because I'm Asian, isn't it?

I was a little racist.

I was definitely a little racist.

I was not getting the benefit of the doubt.

When you shot the ball, my reaction was actually really racist.

I was like, oh!

Oh!

By the way, your reaction was the exact same as D-Wade's, because D-Wade, he was giving

an interview when I shot it, and you could clearly see him being like, this motherfucker

is like, why the fuck is he trying to shot?

Yeah, but not everybody can say that they made a four-pointer in front of D-Wade.

No, I think I might be the only one, because the ruffles, I don't know what this ruffles

four-point thing is, but I think it's only in the Celebrity Game.

I don't think anyone else has ever shot it.

No, no, no.

I'm thoroughly impressed.

Thoroughly impressed by that, man.

Thank you so much.

Thank you.

It might be the best thing I've ever done in my life.

You being paid by ruffles?

Because you didn't have to say it.

You could have just said four-point play.

Four-point play.

Yeah, no, you're right.

Ruffles.

What's going on?

Are you getting a check from ruffles?

No, I wish.

I wish.

OK, all right.

From the Frito-Lay company.

He's shouting y'all out.

Just give C. Moody what he deserves, now.

That's right.

He shot from the rim.

Give him what he deserves.

I did that for free.

I did that for free.

Not just now.

I just got the check attached to it.

That's what I do.

OK?

That's what I do.

OK.

All right?

Trust me when I tell you, they come from the way.

I know you got your back.

Do the right thing.

Don't be racist.

OK.

Just saying.

You and the upcoming Avengers.

Yeah, the Doomsday movie.

Huge.

Come on now.

Huge.

Huge.

Huge.

That's like being on an all-star team, right?

Clearly, Robert Downey Jr.

is like a LeBron.

Yeah, I'd say so.

Who might be the Draymond?

Hmm.

Get a little gossip.

So by Draymond, you mean like, doesn't really do a lot,

talks a lot.

Enforcer kind of.

Enforcer.

Yeah, yeah.

Who would that be?

I'm sorry.

No shade to Draymond.

Pretty shady.

No.

Mackie.

I'd probably say Mackie.

Mackie.

Yeah, I'd probably say Mackie.

By the way.

That man talks a lot.

By the way, that's pretty accurate.

Mackie.

Yeah.

Mackie.

Out there.

I'm not playing.

I've never played him in basketball.

He's intense.

But he seems to think that, even though he's like,

probably almost 10 years older than me,

that he could take me.

And it's just not.

I mean, you've seen me.

You saw me hit the Ruffles.

Hey, listen.

You saw me hit the Ruffles four-point shot.

You're not going to get nothing from me.

I told you.

I'm very shy.

I'll take something from Ruffles.

Do the right thing.

Do the right thing, Ruffles.

Do the right thing.

We just made you check Ruffles six times on this segment.

Yes, but it's all going to make sense when it comes your way.

Thank you.

Let's make some news tonight.

Give us a little Avengers Doomsday spoiler, if you can.

Yeah, if you can.

Tell us something.

I mean.

How does it end?

Yeah.

Yeah.

OK, how about this?

How about this?

My life is in danger, for sure.

How about this?

Since you can't say nothing, here's what we'll do.

We'll read some potential Avengers Doomsday spoilers,

and you just tell us if they're true or not.

Yeah.

OK?

Yeah.

Can we do that?

Yeah.

All right.

Yeah?

All right.

First up, Avengers Doomsday is a musical.

And Wolverine is singing a Neil Diamond song.

We're just asking.

Is that happening?

Yeah.

Yeah.

For sure.

Got one.

Got one.

OK.

All right.

Chris Evans and Robert Downey Jr.

Not senior.

Junior.

They go full heated rivalry.

I mean, if it makes people watch the movie, yeah.

For sure.

For sure.

I don't know.

I think that one might be true.

He didn't blink on that one.

Spider-Man is in the movie, and Uncle Ben returns.

But it's the one from the rice.

Is he in it?

It's true.

Is that in it?

It's all true, man.

I heard Uncle Ben and Sam Jackson go at it.

Oh.

Hey, dude.

That's what I heard.

God bless you.

No, that's what I heard.

That's the best rice I've ever had.

Give me that goddamn rice, motherfucker.

Sam, come on.

I make rice for everybody.

Terrence Howard is returning as Iron Man.

He wants to be Iron Man.

Man.

Iron Man.

Iron Man.

Come on, man.

Come on, man.

That's a deep down.

That's a deep Terrence Howard down.

Come on, man.

What you mean I can't be Iron Man?

Iron Man.

Oh, man.

Iron Man.

What you trying to say?

I can't be Iron Man?

You gotta tell them.

That's for the people that don't get that.

That's a hustle and flow joke.

It's a daily hustle and flow joke.

We can joke all day and have a lot of fun,

but Seymour, the one thing that I will not joke about

is your career, your trajectory, man.

When I talked to you last time,

you were just starting,

and you were excited about the things

that were coming your way.

And it's dope as hell to see you flourish

and fly the way you are, man.

And congrats on your new series,

more importantly,

congrats on another daggone Avengers, man.

Things are going big,

and I don't plan on seeing you stopping

no time soon, okay?

Give me a role in the near future, buddy.

You know, I got stuff that I want to do, right, Ken?

Like, me and you.

There's no reason why we shouldn't be

in these movies with you.

I hear they're looking for another Ant-Man.

What the fuck does that mean?

I'm just saying it's the perfect.

Why'd you do this?

What does that mean?

I said Ant-Man.

Why'd you do this right here?

But Ant-Man gets big.

Yeah, yeah, yeah.

Which Ant-Man am I?

American Sign Language for Ant-Man.

I'm the Ant-Man.

I'm the big one.

I'm the big Ant-Man.

So true.

Yeah, okay.

We'll shoot it low.

Yeah.

Ladies and gentlemen,

I want you to do me a favor

and check out Cobra Hagan Tuts,

which is streaming somewhere else right now, okay?

It's somewhere else.

It's streaming somewhere else.

This week in sports history,

January 8th, 2000,

the Music City Miracle,

the Titans win an AFC wild card game

over the Bills

on a last-second 75-yard kickoff return touchdown.

Today, the Music City Miracle

refers to any time a bachelorette party

makes it home from Nashville

with zero cracked phone screens.

And that was this week's