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1
00:00:06,480 --> 00:00:08,920
MUFFLED SHOUTING
2
00:00:06,480 --> 00:00:08,920
Oh, my goodness.
3
00:00:21,000 --> 00:00:22,480
TYRES SCREECH
4
00:00:26,200 --> 00:00:27,640
MUFFLED SHOUTING
5
00:00:39,000 --> 00:00:42,400
MUFFLED HEAVING BREATHING
6
00:00:45,480 --> 00:00:47,719
Argh! Argh!
7
00:00:47,720 --> 00:00:51,039
VOMITS AND COUGHS
8
00:00:51,040 --> 00:00:54,359
I'm in-between lip waxes,
you animal!
9
00:00:54,360 --> 00:01:00,759
{\an8}I told you, I need to sit in the
front and I need to see the horizon!
10
00:01:00,760 --> 00:01:02,799
Oh, I am sorry about that.
11
00:01:02,800 --> 00:01:04,359
Who are you working for?
12
00:01:04,360 --> 00:01:06,559
I'm not working with anyone! No-one!
13
00:01:06,560 --> 00:01:09,080
VOMITS
14
00:01:11,480 --> 00:01:13,399
What were you planning with Steve?
15
00:01:13,400 --> 00:01:16,359
Nothing! I thought
the guy was one of us!
16
00:01:16,360 --> 00:01:18,519
How did you acquire
the classified documents?
17
00:01:18,520 --> 00:01:20,399
She put it in my bag
without telling me!
18
00:01:20,400 --> 00:01:21,639
What about the money?
19
00:01:21,640 --> 00:01:24,599
I didn't know he was going to
send me ten grand!
20
00:01:24,600 --> 00:01:26,519
15.
21
00:01:26,520 --> 00:01:28,719
Yeah, that's what I meant.
22
00:01:28,720 --> 00:01:30,239
I'm afraid we're going to have to
23
00:01:30,240 --> 00:01:32,399
turn on the sound
for another ten minutes.
24
00:01:32,400 --> 00:01:35,160
- No, please.
- Bloody awful racket.
25
00:01:36,400 --> 00:01:41,879
OVERLAPPING SCREECHING NOISES
26
00:01:41,880 --> 00:01:45,879
What is this?!
Is this Slipknot or what?!
27
00:01:45,880 --> 00:01:47,920
NOISE CONTINUES
28
00:01:54,200 --> 00:01:58,679
Well, this is good news.
Your stories tally up.
29
00:01:58,680 --> 00:02:01,959
We're satisfied beyond reasonable
doubt that you are not, in fact,
30
00:02:01,960 --> 00:02:06,839
double agents. So, I'll be ticking
"ineptitude" on my form.
31
00:02:06,840 --> 00:02:09,759
- So we're not going to prison?
- No.
32
00:02:09,760 --> 00:02:12,479
But in case it wasn't obvious,
you're both dismissed.
33
00:02:12,480 --> 00:02:13,959
Effective immediately.
34
00:02:13,960 --> 00:02:17,799
Ma'am, look, erm,
I know we messed up.
35
00:02:17,800 --> 00:02:21,079
We've already gathered some really
useful intel on this guy.
36
00:02:21,080 --> 00:02:24,359
- Steve, for one, we don't think
that's his real name. - Yeah.
37
00:02:24,360 --> 00:02:26,239
For another,
he doesn't drink orange squash.
38
00:02:26,240 --> 00:02:29,399
Also some other stuff you should
know that is better than that.
39
00:02:29,400 --> 00:02:31,599
You know what, I think we're good.
We've got this.
40
00:02:31,600 --> 00:02:34,799
We could pool information.
You know, work out who this guy is.
41
00:02:34,800 --> 00:02:36,959
We know who he is.
42
00:02:36,960 --> 00:02:39,679
Steve's real name is Jared O'Hara.
43
00:02:39,680 --> 00:02:42,759
He's an Oxford graduate
who fucked up, got into drugs.
44
00:02:42,760 --> 00:02:46,759
He's done six months for card fraud
and isn't allowed a mortgage.
45
00:02:46,760 --> 00:02:50,319
Three days ago, we got intel from
an asset inside a far-right group.
46
00:02:50,320 --> 00:02:52,359
Someone tried to sell them
the security plans
47
00:02:52,360 --> 00:02:54,919
for the Notting Hill Carnival
for a ludicrous price.
48
00:02:54,920 --> 00:02:59,119
One of our agents then found said
plans in a bin outside the pub.
49
00:02:59,120 --> 00:03:02,719
Wait... Wait, this pub.
Was it The Rope & Anchor?
50
00:03:02,720 --> 00:03:06,279
That's the one. We're satisfied
he's not a serious threat.
51
00:03:06,280 --> 00:03:08,039
The police'll take it from here.
52
00:03:08,040 --> 00:03:11,239
Ma'am... I'm sorry,
this just doesn't make any sense.
53
00:03:11,240 --> 00:03:15,639
You didn't see this guy,
he was a real slick operator.
54
00:03:15,640 --> 00:03:17,439
He's planning something.
55
00:03:17,440 --> 00:03:21,879
We're satisfied
he's not a serious threat.
56
00:03:21,880 --> 00:03:23,439
Oh, my...
57
00:03:23,440 --> 00:03:25,319
He set this up as a double bluff!
58
00:03:25,320 --> 00:03:26,799
He knew this would get back to you.
59
00:03:26,800 --> 00:03:29,039
That was probably a fake ID!
60
00:03:29,040 --> 00:03:31,319
He's trying to make it seem like
he's not serious
61
00:03:31,320 --> 00:03:32,999
but I'm telling you, he is.
62
00:03:33,000 --> 00:03:35,599
Or could it be, Dominique,
that you're not?!
63
00:03:35,600 --> 00:03:37,599
I mean, come on.
64
00:03:37,600 --> 00:03:40,799
This is the oldest play in the book
and you fell for it.
65
00:03:40,800 --> 00:03:42,599
This is the same kind of shit
66
00:03:42,600 --> 00:03:45,759
cold callers tried
on my 86-year-old mother
67
00:03:45,760 --> 00:03:48,999
and even she knew something fishy
was going on!
68
00:03:49,000 --> 00:03:53,679
Keeping this country safe requires
the brightest minds, Dominique.
69
00:03:53,680 --> 00:03:56,999
We might have the odd job
for those who fall short of that -
70
00:03:57,000 --> 00:04:00,239
the archives, for example.
But for you...
71
00:04:00,240 --> 00:04:03,120
..you may find other work
more suitable.
72
00:04:04,920 --> 00:04:06,719
- We're done here.
- Ma'am?
73
00:04:06,720 --> 00:04:10,079
- No, no, do we have to do that?
- Ma'am...? - Can I get a nausea band?
74
00:04:10,080 --> 00:04:12,160
Or at least crack open a window!
75
00:04:16,000 --> 00:04:18,040
WIND HOWLS
76
00:04:23,840 --> 00:04:27,720
I guess...all's well that ends
well.
77
00:04:30,360 --> 00:04:33,639
I'm sorry... Excuse me?!
78
00:04:33,640 --> 00:04:35,919
As in, we're not in serious trouble.
79
00:04:35,920 --> 00:04:39,679
You just cost me my job.
80
00:04:39,680 --> 00:04:42,799
- Oh...
- I - cost you YOUR job?!
81
00:04:42,800 --> 00:04:45,719
Yeah. By stabbing me in the back.
82
00:04:45,720 --> 00:04:50,759
Excuse me. YOU were the one
who put the file in MY bag.
83
00:04:50,760 --> 00:04:53,959
And even then, I stood by you.
I helped you.
84
00:04:53,960 --> 00:04:57,959
Until you stabbed me in the back.
85
00:04:57,960 --> 00:04:59,959
Why did you do it, Kay?!
86
00:04:59,960 --> 00:05:02,559
Steve would have walked through
that door any minute!
87
00:05:02,560 --> 00:05:04,599
Yeah, well, the police'll
take care of him now.
88
00:05:04,600 --> 00:05:06,359
They're never going to find him!
89
00:05:06,360 --> 00:05:08,999
He's not going to go back
to that flat now, is he?
90
00:05:09,000 --> 00:05:11,919
Not after you invited
half of MI5 round for breakfast!
91
00:05:11,920 --> 00:05:13,999
- Well, what does it matter now
anyway? - Wha...
92
00:05:14,000 --> 00:05:17,519
- Fisher says he's not even a serious
threat. - He is a serious threat!
93
00:05:17,520 --> 00:05:19,319
Oh, and MI5 are wrong about that,
are they?
94
00:05:19,320 --> 00:05:21,600
- Yes!
- And your evidence for that is?
95
00:05:23,440 --> 00:05:26,559
- My instincts.
- Oh, your instincts?!
96
00:05:26,560 --> 00:05:29,639
Your instincts that led you to give
the file away in the first place!
97
00:05:29,640 --> 00:05:32,039
Dom, listen to yourself!
98
00:05:32,040 --> 00:05:35,159
This is what this whole thing
has been about - your ego!
99
00:05:35,160 --> 00:05:37,270
You just can't accept
when you're wrong!
100
00:05:41,880 --> 00:05:43,279
SIGHS
101
00:05:43,280 --> 00:05:45,999
Look, I'm sorry you messed up.
102
00:05:46,000 --> 00:05:48,479
But you did.
103
00:05:48,480 --> 00:05:50,360
Look, everyone has an off day.
104
00:05:52,480 --> 00:05:56,479
He played on your vulnerabilities.
You wanted a better job.
105
00:05:56,480 --> 00:05:59,559
And I saw him,
he was a good-looking guy...
106
00:05:59,560 --> 00:06:02,279
You know what, Kay? Fuck you!
107
00:06:02,280 --> 00:06:04,119
Yeah, well...
108
00:06:04,120 --> 00:06:06,759
Forget you, Dom!
109
00:06:06,760 --> 00:06:08,639
What, are you just going to walk
all the way back to London?!
110
00:06:08,640 --> 00:06:13,279
The app says that the bus
is going to be here in...
111
00:06:13,280 --> 00:06:15,760
..an hour and 43 minutes!
112
00:06:19,120 --> 00:06:22,119
And this man! Honestly, grrr!
113
00:06:22,120 --> 00:06:25,799
I don't know how he managed
to organise all of this,
114
00:06:25,800 --> 00:06:28,159
and he can't even organise
his own sock drawer!
115
00:06:28,160 --> 00:06:29,679
LAUGHTER
116
00:06:29,680 --> 00:06:34,240
No, but seriously,
I am so overwhelmed. I...
117
00:06:35,480 --> 00:06:37,839
Morris,
118
00:06:37,840 --> 00:06:40,359
you're not just my best friend...
119
00:06:40,360 --> 00:06:42,039
Oh, I'm going to get emotional.
120
00:06:42,040 --> 00:06:43,839
Oh!
121
00:06:43,840 --> 00:06:47,559
You're my soulmate.
Thank you, darling.
122
00:06:47,560 --> 00:06:51,639
- And thank you, ev...
- Fuck... Oh, fuck! Bollocks!
123
00:06:51,640 --> 00:06:54,239
It's all broke...
124
00:06:54,240 --> 00:06:56,119
Oh... Sorry. Hello.
125
00:06:56,120 --> 00:06:58,199
Um...
126
00:06:58,200 --> 00:07:00,720
Sorry...
127
00:06:58,200 --> 00:07:00,719
CLATTERING
128
00:07:00,720 --> 00:07:02,719
I'll pay for that.
129
00:07:02,720 --> 00:07:04,719
Sorry.
130
00:07:04,720 --> 00:07:06,599
Ah, hello, Auntie Maureen.
131
00:07:06,600 --> 00:07:10,199
You look nice.
You've done something with your...
132
00:07:10,200 --> 00:07:11,680
..your head tie.
133
00:07:14,480 --> 00:07:16,759
- To Julie!
- To Julie!
134
00:07:16,760 --> 00:07:18,600
ALL: To Julie!
135
00:07:20,320 --> 00:07:23,759
Where have you been? Your dad's
been introducing me to everyone.
136
00:07:23,760 --> 00:07:26,470
- What happened to you?!
- I don't want to talk about it.
137
00:07:27,880 --> 00:07:31,159
- Oh!
- Oh! - Dom!
138
00:07:31,160 --> 00:07:33,199
- I live here.
- Yeah.
139
00:07:33,200 --> 00:07:36,119
- Oh, and you've brought me a, erm...
- Yeah, they're a little bit flaccid,
140
00:07:36,120 --> 00:07:38,799
- but, you know,
it's the thought that counts. - Yeah.
141
00:07:38,800 --> 00:07:42,759
- I also, er, got you a scented
candle. It's somewhere. - Oh, darling.
142
00:07:42,760 --> 00:07:45,279
Thank you. That's so sweet.
143
00:07:45,280 --> 00:07:48,839
My word. What a way
you come to a party.
144
00:07:48,840 --> 00:07:50,519
You never hear the dress code?!
145
00:07:50,520 --> 00:07:53,319
I didn't know there was
a dress code, Auntie Maureen.
146
00:07:53,320 --> 00:07:56,399
- It was on the family group chat.
- I'm not even on the family group chat.
147
00:07:56,400 --> 00:07:58,599
- Well, that's your problem.
- How come you're on the family group chat?!
148
00:07:58,600 --> 00:08:01,959
- Cos they like...
- And why are you so tardy?
149
00:08:01,960 --> 00:08:04,639
I got...a little tied up.
150
00:08:04,640 --> 00:08:08,039
No, no, it's fine. I mean,
Dom gets held up at work sometimes.
151
00:08:08,040 --> 00:08:12,719
- Mm. My baby works for the Food
Standards Agency now. - Thank you.
152
00:08:12,720 --> 00:08:16,639
Government job.
People's lives are in her hands.
153
00:08:16,640 --> 00:08:20,399
- Oh, really?
- And it's office-based!
154
00:08:20,400 --> 00:08:24,799
Dom finally hold down a job...
155
00:08:24,800 --> 00:08:29,999
..and a man?
And people say God isn't real!
156
00:08:30,000 --> 00:08:34,519
- Actually...
- And we are so proud of her!
157
00:08:34,520 --> 00:08:38,959
- Proud.
- SOFTLY: Er, Dad, I๏ฟฝI don't work there any more.
158
00:08:38,960 --> 00:08:42,119
I knew it! That child can't cook.
159
00:08:42,120 --> 00:08:45,119
Her mother was a beautiful cook.
160
00:08:45,120 --> 00:08:48,079
This one, we only let her bring ice.
161
00:08:48,080 --> 00:08:50,519
Even Cousin Darren's
allowed to choose the crisps.
162
00:08:50,520 --> 00:08:52,239
And he used to be on crack!
163
00:08:52,240 --> 00:08:53,959
Oh...
164
00:08:53,960 --> 00:08:55,159
Evenin'.
165
00:08:55,160 --> 00:08:57,879
Oh, hi, Darren!
166
00:08:57,880 --> 00:08:59,799
And how are you?
167
00:08:59,800 --> 00:09:03,319
Fantastic. Regional top salesman
three months in a row.
168
00:09:03,320 --> 00:09:06,639
Even Darren's
turned his life around.
169
00:09:06,640 --> 00:09:08,479
What do you mean, you don't
work there any more? Do you mean
170
00:09:08,480 --> 00:09:11,359
- you've changed department...
- No, I mean, I was fired. OK, Dad?
171
00:09:11,360 --> 00:09:13,800
I was fired. I was let go of.
I am jobless.
172
00:09:14,920 --> 00:09:18,759
So, the job isn't real.
173
00:09:18,760 --> 00:09:20,719
The boyfriend fake, too?
174
00:09:20,720 --> 00:09:22,919
Probably. He's a global ten.
175
00:09:22,920 --> 00:09:26,559
Dom's, what, a Hackney five?
176
00:09:26,560 --> 00:09:29,280
Yo, does this look fake?
177
00:09:35,040 --> 00:09:38,319
If you'll excuse us,
we're going to the buffet.
178
00:09:38,320 --> 00:09:41,200
- Come on.
- Bye.
179
00:09:42,400 --> 00:09:44,479
- Uncle Morris...
- Mm?
180
00:09:44,480 --> 00:09:48,759
Did you know triple glazing can save
you hundreds a year on energy bills?
181
00:09:48,760 --> 00:09:52,360
- Go...
- Shout, man. I got you.
182
00:09:57,491 --> 00:10:02,959
- You know I don't need your pity,
right? - I know. Look, your family
183
00:10:02,960 --> 00:10:05,399
were just being a little bit...
184
00:10:05,400 --> 00:10:07,799
Listen, if circumstances
were different,
185
00:10:07,800 --> 00:10:11,159
man definitely would,
you know what I mean?
186
00:10:11,160 --> 00:10:14,560
Well, that's nasty.
And man definitely would be denied.
187
00:10:15,800 --> 00:10:17,080
But thank you.
188
00:10:17,081 --> 00:10:21,039
You know I can't get your record
wiped now, right?
189
00:10:21,040 --> 00:10:24,799
Yeah, I clocked that. I'm tapped.
190
00:10:24,800 --> 00:10:30,799
You know, whatever I did...
Brightmarsh, all of that shit,
191
00:10:30,800 --> 00:10:32,079
I did it all for Jayden.
192
00:10:32,080 --> 00:10:34,719
Tried to give her the start in life
that I didn't have.
193
00:10:34,720 --> 00:10:39,359
Every penny I earned,
I put into an account in her name.
194
00:10:39,360 --> 00:10:42,639
Every penny you earned?
Erm, what about the G-wagon?
195
00:10:42,640 --> 00:10:45,919
- Man can't be trapping
in a Ford Focus. - Mm-hm.
196
00:10:45,920 --> 00:10:48,279
- So, what are you going to do now?
- Don't know.
197
00:10:48,280 --> 00:10:49,919
Maybe I'll hand myself in.
198
00:10:49,920 --> 00:10:53,479
Well, I mean, at least your daughter
would know where you were, you know?
199
00:10:53,480 --> 00:10:57,279
- Cos you'd be in prison.
- Yes. Yes, I understood that.
200
00:10:57,280 --> 00:11:00,839
Whatever way this goes, I know
I'll never be able to see her again.
201
00:11:00,840 --> 00:11:04,999
- Her mum'll make sure of that.
- Look, you could...
202
00:11:05,000 --> 00:11:08,559
..stay a bit longer
if you wanted to. Until...
203
00:11:08,560 --> 00:11:10,680
..mans is less tapped.
204
00:11:10,991 --> 00:11:16,679
I really don't want to go back
and hang out with Auntie Maureen.
205
00:11:16,680 --> 00:11:17,799
Oh, no, definitely.
206
00:11:17,800 --> 00:11:20,879
I'm staying here until
she goes home to watch Casualty.
207
00:11:20,880 --> 00:11:23,720
- Callaloo?
- Callaloo.
208
00:11:28,931 --> 00:11:34,319
Well, it's just over a week
to the Notting Hill Carnival.
209
00:11:34,320 --> 00:11:37,439
Sequins are being stitched,
feathers plumped, chicken jerked.
210
00:11:37,440 --> 00:11:39,319
- And we caught up with
the year six pupils... - Dominique!
211
00:11:39,320 --> 00:11:42,079
..of St Christopher's in Streatham
who, this year, are planning a float
212
00:11:42,080 --> 00:11:43,440
with a difference...
213
00:11:44,520 --> 00:11:45,839
Dom, get up!
214
00:11:45,840 --> 00:11:48,040
DOM GROANS
215
00:11:45,840 --> 00:11:48,039
It's nearly midday.
216
00:11:48,040 --> 00:11:50,240
Oh, God! What?! Fuck!
217
00:11:51,320 --> 00:11:55,160
Why do you hate me?!
I'm your daughter!
218
00:11:55,161 --> 00:11:59,599
That's one hot chocolate
and one hot chocolate with oat milk.
219
00:11:59,600 --> 00:12:02,279
- There you go, partner.
- Thanking you, sir.
220
00:12:02,280 --> 00:12:03,439
THEY LAUGH
221
00:12:03,440 --> 00:12:05,039
Ah, what are we doing
in this shift, Yas?
222
00:12:05,040 --> 00:12:06,959
Well, it's not very exciting,
223
00:12:06,960 --> 00:12:09,919
but we're going to supervise
some young people doing graffiti
224
00:12:09,920 --> 00:12:14,039
- on a wall where they've got express
permission. - That. Sounds. Lovely.
225
00:12:14,040 --> 00:12:15,479
It does, doesn't it?
226
00:12:15,480 --> 00:12:18,559
Also, I've baked some sugar-free
macaroons that we can all share.
227
00:12:18,560 --> 00:12:21,399
- Oh, brilliant! That'll bring
everyone together! - Yeah!
228
00:12:21,400 --> 00:12:26,879
How about this? Online picker
for a major supermarket?
229
00:12:26,880 --> 00:12:29,679
- It's a ๏ฟฝ10 night-time premium.
- No!
230
00:12:29,680 --> 00:12:33,759
- Oh, er, do we need to talk again
about the PGCE? - Uh...
231
00:12:33,760 --> 00:12:35,639
You've got to apply for something,
Dom.
232
00:12:35,640 --> 00:12:38,920
The worst thing you can have in life
is a gap on your CV.
233
00:12:43,640 --> 00:12:46,640
INDISTINCT CHAT
234
00:12:48,560 --> 00:12:50,720
SIGHS HAPPILY
235
00:12:48,560 --> 00:12:50,719
Man, I love a briefing.
236
00:12:50,720 --> 00:12:53,719
- Kay!
- Yas!
237
00:12:53,720 --> 00:12:56,639
- Sorry, can I just...? Yas!
- Hiya!
238
00:12:56,640 --> 00:12:59,399
- I didn't know you were doing a shift
today. - Yeah, I love Carnival.
239
00:12:59,400 --> 00:13:01,839
- Volunteer for it every year.
- Me too! - No!
240
00:13:01,840 --> 00:13:04,519
Yeah, er, tomorrow
I'm actually playing on a float.
241
00:13:04,520 --> 00:13:06,879
- Stop it.
- Yeah. Yeah, I'm in a steel band.
242
00:13:06,880 --> 00:13:09,359
- Oh, my God!
- I know. It's not a big deal...
243
00:13:09,360 --> 00:13:12,959
- No, no, no...
- Can I get your attention, please?
244
00:13:12,960 --> 00:13:18,759
Ole, ole, ole, ole.
How we feeling?
245
00:13:18,760 --> 00:13:20,439
UNENTHUSIASTIC MUTTERING
246
00:13:20,440 --> 00:13:22,359
Today's the first day of Carnival.
247
00:13:22,360 --> 00:13:24,599
There is only one acceptable answer
to that question.
248
00:13:24,600 --> 00:13:28,799
That is, "Hot, hot, hot." So,
I'll ask again. How are we feeling?
249
00:13:28,800 --> 00:13:32,679
- ALL:
- Hot! Hot! Hot! - That's more like it!
250
00:13:32,680 --> 00:13:36,879
First of all, a big thank you
for volunteering.
251
00:13:36,880 --> 00:13:38,999
This shift is a lot of fun.
252
00:13:39,000 --> 00:13:41,319
We have a laugh. But...
253
00:13:41,320 --> 00:13:48,239
..make no mistake, this is the most
challenging crowd control exercise
254
00:13:48,240 --> 00:13:51,879
this side of the Hajj.
255
00:13:51,880 --> 00:13:55,959
Now, there will be
two million revellers
256
00:13:55,960 --> 00:13:58,239
descending on these streets
this weekend,
257
00:13:58,240 --> 00:14:03,319
so this needs to run like clockwork.
Military grade clockwork.
258
00:14:03,320 --> 00:14:05,719
I'm talking the kind of clock
you would find
259
00:14:05,720 --> 00:14:10,519
presumably on the dashboard
of a tank.
260
00:14:10,520 --> 00:14:13,239
Now, under your seats,
you'll find a number of items.
261
00:14:13,240 --> 00:14:17,039
Don't look now! I didn't say
look now! Eyes on me, please!
262
00:14:17,040 --> 00:14:19,559
It's chaos in here!
263
00:14:19,560 --> 00:14:21,719
First of all, you will find...
264
00:14:21,720 --> 00:14:23,399
FINGERS CLICK
265
00:14:23,400 --> 00:14:25,799
..a high-vis vest. Put it on.
266
00:14:25,800 --> 00:14:30,559
Not tied around your waist,
not slung over your shoulder but on!
267
00:14:30,560 --> 00:14:32,679
Secondly - quickly, Mel -
268
00:14:32,680 --> 00:14:36,479
a goodie bag.
A few little treats in there for ya.
269
00:14:36,480 --> 00:14:39,119
A bottle of smart water,
sunblock,
270
00:14:39,120 --> 00:14:41,519
and my personal favourite -
271
00:14:41,520 --> 00:14:45,119
a good old jar
of Reggae Reggae Sauce.
272
00:14:45,120 --> 00:14:48,559
Goes with anything. Just a little
thank you for your efforts,
273
00:14:48,560 --> 00:14:51,480
from the local
residents' association.
274
00:14:55,800 --> 00:14:59,159
Last, but most certainly not least,
you will find - Mel! -
275
00:14:59,160 --> 00:15:02,359
one of these. A radio.
276
00:15:02,360 --> 00:15:05,279
Channel one, open at all times.
277
00:15:05,280 --> 00:15:08,520
As far as you're concerned,
this is the voice of God.
278
00:15:10,120 --> 00:15:13,679
- Yes, what?
- Um...we already have radios.
279
00:15:13,680 --> 00:15:15,559
There's always one,
isn't there, Mel?
280
00:15:15,560 --> 00:15:17,919
Yeah, we know
you already have radios
281
00:15:17,920 --> 00:15:21,239
but everyone on crowd control
is on one of these.
282
00:15:21,240 --> 00:15:23,199
Top brass want to keep
the police channels open
283
00:15:23,200 --> 00:15:25,439
in case of an emergency.
284
00:15:25,440 --> 00:15:26,999
Yes, Kay, what?!
285
00:15:27,000 --> 00:15:29,399
No, it's just,
we didn't do this last year.
286
00:15:29,400 --> 00:15:31,039
It's called progress, mate.
287
00:15:31,040 --> 00:15:33,719
We're not allowed to punch people in
the kidneys any more either, are we?
288
00:15:33,720 --> 00:15:35,360
Rightly or wrongly.
289
00:15:37,080 --> 00:15:41,240
It's rightly! It's a joke!
290
00:15:42,560 --> 00:15:44,439
Get with it, Mel!
291
00:15:44,440 --> 00:15:48,039
Now, just because
you're going to be working today
292
00:15:48,040 --> 00:15:49,679
don't mean you have to stand still.
293
00:15:49,680 --> 00:15:52,839
The press love it when us guys
dance with the revellers,
294
00:15:52,840 --> 00:15:57,159
so it's fallen on me to show you
the correct way
295
00:15:57,160 --> 00:16:00,999
to 'whine'! Yeah!
You know what I'm talking about?
296
00:16:01,000 --> 00:16:03,759
Come on, Carnivalistas,
on your feet. Let's get whining!
297
00:16:03,760 --> 00:16:07,479
Move those hips, use your core,
use your core. Watch your back,
298
00:16:07,480 --> 00:16:09,159
you'll do yourself a mischief.
299
00:16:09,160 --> 00:16:11,479
Bring it right down,
right down to the floor!
300
00:16:11,480 --> 00:16:14,519
How low can you go?
Right down, look at that!
301
00:16:14,520 --> 00:16:17,280
Kay, where are you going, mate?
I need ya. I need ya.
302
00:16:18,440 --> 00:16:20,960
Come on, get them bumpers
nice and low. Mm!
303
00:16:34,440 --> 00:16:37,280
LIVELY MUSIC
304
00:16:41,040 --> 00:16:45,160
Happy Carnival, guys.
Stay hydrated. I hope that's water!
305
00:16:47,480 --> 00:16:49,919
- REPORTER:
- It's day one of Carnival.
306
00:16:49,920 --> 00:16:53,119
You can see the streets there
beginning to fill up nicely.
307
00:16:53,120 --> 00:16:54,799
Over the next few days...
308
00:16:54,800 --> 00:16:57,079
Putting on a mixed wash
if you've got anything.
309
00:16:57,080 --> 00:17:00,479
You know you can drop the whole
perfect house guest bit now, right?
310
00:17:00,480 --> 00:17:02,239
- I know.
- So, just do what I do.
311
00:17:02,240 --> 00:17:03,919
Put it in a basket and leave it
until
312
00:17:03,920 --> 00:17:05,559
Julie cracks and does it herself.
313
00:17:05,560 --> 00:17:08,320
I'm packing up.
I'm leaving tomorrow.
314
00:17:11,120 --> 00:17:12,839
Where are you going to go?
315
00:17:12,840 --> 00:17:15,039
Going to head for Felixstowe.
316
00:17:15,040 --> 00:17:17,679
Get myself
in-between the containers.
317
00:17:17,680 --> 00:17:20,399
See if I can get myself on a ship.
318
00:17:20,400 --> 00:17:21,839
Whoa.
319
00:17:21,840 --> 00:17:24,199
That sounds...
320
00:17:24,200 --> 00:17:26,800
insane! That's like...
321
00:17:27,840 --> 00:17:32,999
- Yeah.
- Like a black stowaway. You've not thought this through, bro.
322
00:17:33,000 --> 00:17:34,080
Hmm!
323
00:17:36,000 --> 00:17:38,280
There's a favour I need before I go.
324
00:17:40,760 --> 00:17:43,079
I need you to take these
somewhere for me.
325
00:17:43,080 --> 00:17:45,999
The Istanbul Social Club
on Green Lanes.
326
00:17:46,000 --> 00:17:49,999
Ask for Ercan. Give these to him.
And he'll give you an envelope.
327
00:17:50,000 --> 00:17:55,519
What in the nerdiverse,
Comicon, loser, virgin, incel,
328
00:17:55,520 --> 00:17:57,039
nonsense is this?
329
00:17:57,040 --> 00:18:00,559
- It's my getaway fund.
- Some old toys?
330
00:18:00,560 --> 00:18:04,039
- You Feds really don't know niche,
do you? - Know what?
331
00:18:04,040 --> 00:18:05,599
This shit's worth bare piece.
332
00:18:05,600 --> 00:18:08,599
'80s, '90s collectables boxed,
mint-condition.
333
00:18:08,600 --> 00:18:10,959
This is the real road man's
economy now.
334
00:18:10,960 --> 00:18:13,039
It's where all the real G's
are putting their cash.
335
00:18:13,040 --> 00:18:15,359
No-one's looking into this
like crypto.
336
00:18:15,360 --> 00:18:18,239
If you're from East,
you're into N64 games.
337
00:18:18,240 --> 00:18:20,440
All them West dons
into Beanie Babies.
338
00:18:21,880 --> 00:18:23,559
They're Pogs!
339
00:18:23,560 --> 00:18:25,060
These were massive in the '90s.
340
00:18:26,560 --> 00:18:28,879
What about Pogs?
341
00:18:28,880 --> 00:18:30,359
That's the gold standard, boy.
342
00:18:30,360 --> 00:18:33,479
What if someone had a sports bag
full of packaged,
343
00:18:33,480 --> 00:18:35,079
mint-condition Pogs?
344
00:18:35,080 --> 00:18:37,639
- EXHALES
- That's one hell of a getaway fund.
345
00:18:37,640 --> 00:18:39,999
Oh, my God!
346
00:18:40,000 --> 00:18:41,399
LAUGHS
347
00:18:41,400 --> 00:18:44,079
..so he tells me he smokes
for religious reasons
348
00:18:44,080 --> 00:18:48,759
and I said, "Mate, you're a
17-year-old ginger lad from Epsom."
349
00:18:48,760 --> 00:18:52,439
- Oh!
- Trying to fool me. - I know, I know.
350
00:18:52,440 --> 00:18:54,999
Er, Yas, do you mind if we take
a quick detour on the way home?
351
00:18:55,000 --> 00:18:58,680
Er...yeah.
What were you thinking?
352
00:19:03,640 --> 00:19:09,359
- What is this place?
- Wait here. Just gotta go and speak to someone.
353
00:19:09,360 --> 00:19:10,880
Just someone.
354
00:19:13,080 --> 00:19:17,600
And, er, whatever you do,
don't come in after me.
355
00:19:19,040 --> 00:19:22,000
INTERCOM BUZZES
356
00:19:19,040 --> 00:19:22,000
Salisbury Plain.
357
00:19:23,400 --> 00:19:24,880
DOOR UNLOCKS
358
00:19:31,880 --> 00:19:34,839
- Afternoon.
- Didn't think you'd be here on a Sunday.
359
00:19:34,840 --> 00:19:37,239
You're lucky. If you'd been here
half an hour earlier,
360
00:19:37,240 --> 00:19:39,679
I'd still have been pillaging.
361
00:19:39,680 --> 00:19:42,039
I should warn you, though,
I can't give you any kit.
362
00:19:42,040 --> 00:19:43,640
Because it's a Sunday?
363
00:19:47,000 --> 00:19:48,319
Cos you've been fired.
364
00:19:48,320 --> 00:19:50,919
Oh, erm, how do you know about that?
365
00:19:50,920 --> 00:19:52,959
Well, for one,
you gave the old password.
366
00:19:52,960 --> 00:19:55,919
And for another,
you just admitted it.
367
00:19:55,920 --> 00:19:57,399
Yes. Very good.
368
00:19:57,400 --> 00:19:58,719
LAUGHS
369
00:19:58,720 --> 00:20:01,479
You should work for MI5.
370
00:20:01,480 --> 00:20:03,599
- Look, I just wanted to ask your
opinion about something. - You know
371
00:20:03,600 --> 00:20:07,090
I could probably lose my job just
for continuing this conversation?
372
00:20:08,560 --> 00:20:11,280
So don't tell anyone. What is it?
373
00:20:12,720 --> 00:20:16,279
Oof, ah,
that's a blast from the past.
374
00:20:16,280 --> 00:20:18,399
Aah...
375
00:20:18,400 --> 00:20:21,199
The Tawagoto 639.
376
00:20:21,200 --> 00:20:25,879
Used by police up until, ooh, 2004.
377
00:20:25,880 --> 00:20:28,279
Cheap, decent battery life.
378
00:20:28,280 --> 00:20:32,359
But security-wise,
not much better than Fisher Price.
379
00:20:32,360 --> 00:20:34,039
Well, how do you mean?
380
00:20:34,040 --> 00:20:36,239
Notoriously easy to scramble.
381
00:20:36,240 --> 00:20:39,479
Anyone with a decent transmitter
and a GCSE in physics
382
00:20:39,480 --> 00:20:43,160
can block the signal on one of these
things and render them useless.
383
00:20:46,440 --> 00:20:48,160
Thank you. Thank you.
384
00:20:49,800 --> 00:20:51,199
A lot of money.
385
00:20:51,200 --> 00:20:52,680
WHISTLES APPRECIATIVELY
386
00:20:56,040 --> 00:20:57,160
SIGHS
387
00:21:01,200 --> 00:21:03,639
LINE RINGS
388
00:21:03,640 --> 00:21:05,560
PHONE RINGS
389
00:21:08,760 --> 00:21:11,119
- Yello?
- Ew.
390
00:21:11,120 --> 00:21:12,999
Erm, who... Who is this?
391
00:21:13,000 --> 00:21:16,959
Yas. Well, it's Yasmin, actually,
but everyone just calls me Yas.
392
00:21:16,960 --> 00:21:18,559
Right.
393
00:21:18,560 --> 00:21:20,079
And you are?
394
00:21:20,080 --> 00:21:23,440
Oh, sorry!
Erm, I'm Kay's partner.
395
00:21:24,600 --> 00:21:26,599
Kay's...
396
00:21:26,600 --> 00:21:27,999
OK. Is he there?
397
00:21:28,000 --> 00:21:30,879
He's actually kind of busy right
now, he can't come to the phone.
398
00:21:30,880 --> 00:21:33,279
SOFTLY: Motherf...
399
00:21:33,280 --> 00:21:34,719
Did you want to leave a message?
400
00:21:34,720 --> 00:21:37,359
No. I don't. Because...
401
00:21:37,360 --> 00:21:39,079
You know, this was a pocket dial.
402
00:21:39,080 --> 00:21:41,759
If it's a pocket dial,
then how are we talking?
403
00:21:41,760 --> 00:21:45,560
Because...I'm wearing
a Bluetooth headset, all right?!
404
00:21:50,000 --> 00:21:52,239
OK, OK, OK.
405
00:21:52,240 --> 00:21:55,079
Oh, I need to make a call!
I need to make a call! Oh, yes.
406
00:21:55,080 --> 00:21:57,679
Oh... Wait, before I make this call,
407
00:21:57,680 --> 00:22:00,279
- there's something I need
to tell you, Yas. - What is it?
408
00:22:00,280 --> 00:22:01,479
EXHALES
409
00:22:01,480 --> 00:22:06,679
Until quite recently, I used to
work for the security services. MI5.
410
00:22:06,680 --> 00:22:09,479
- Like James Bond?!
- Yes. Only...
411
00:22:09,480 --> 00:22:13,439
..Christian, monogamous
and with a licence to praise.
412
00:22:13,440 --> 00:22:16,919
I need you to keep whatever you hear
now absolutely secret,
413
00:22:16,920 --> 00:22:20,039
- for your safety and the country's.
Do you understand? - Yes.
414
00:22:20,040 --> 00:22:23,079
- Yas, do you understand?!
- Yes! - I need you to say, yes!
415
00:22:23,080 --> 00:22:24,319
LINE RINGS
416
00:22:24,320 --> 00:22:26,959
Hey. Uh...answer this!
417
00:22:26,960 --> 00:22:29,079
- What?
- Answer it and say I'm busy
418
00:22:29,080 --> 00:22:31,279
- and I can't come to the phone
right now. - Why? Who is it?
419
00:22:31,280 --> 00:22:33,599
Just do it! Quick!
Wait, wait, wait, wait!
420
00:22:33,600 --> 00:22:35,079
- Do an accent.
- What?
421
00:22:35,080 --> 00:22:38,520
Just, like, give it some Spanish.
No, no, no, no! Italian.
422
00:22:41,520 --> 00:22:43,079
Ciao.
423
00:22:43,080 --> 00:22:45,039
Er...hi. Is Dom there?
424
00:22:45,040 --> 00:22:47,999
- Dom can't come to the phone
right now. - Italian!
425
00:22:48,000 --> 00:22:52,199
Oh, er, OK. Well,
can you pass on a message?
426
00:22:52,200 --> 00:22:54,639
Arrivederci.
427
00:22:54,640 --> 00:22:56,799
Tutti fruity.
428
00:22:56,800 --> 00:22:58,160
Alora.
429
00:23:01,320 --> 00:23:05,079
So, you know what I told you before?
The MI5 stuff?
430
00:23:05,080 --> 00:23:06,439
Just forget I said that.
431
00:23:06,440 --> 00:23:07,999
- Oh.
- Just forget I said that.
432
00:23:08,000 --> 00:23:12,359
It was just, er, you know, me, MI5?!
Ha! What a joke!
433
00:23:12,360 --> 00:23:16,799
THEY LAUGH
434
00:23:16,800 --> 00:23:18,559
DOORBELL CHIMES
435
00:23:18,560 --> 00:23:21,199
Dom? Dom?! It's me!
436
00:23:21,200 --> 00:23:23,759
We really need to talk.
437
00:23:23,760 --> 00:23:26,759
Morris, come and look at this.
438
00:23:26,760 --> 00:23:30,599
- There's another one!
- Honestly, it's true what they say.
439
00:23:30,600 --> 00:23:32,959
You wait for one bus
to come along...
440
00:23:32,960 --> 00:23:34,360
THEY LAUGH
441
00:23:36,600 --> 00:23:38,639
You going to answer that?
442
00:23:38,640 --> 00:23:41,320
No! And don't you answer it, either.
443
00:23:47,320 --> 00:23:49,960
DOOR OPENS
You're making a fool of yourself.
444
00:23:51,280 --> 00:23:53,959
- What do you want?
- You called me. - No, I didn't.
445
00:23:53,960 --> 00:23:57,199
- Well, Yas said you did.
- Well, I told Yas it was a pocket dial!
446
00:23:57,200 --> 00:23:59,320
So you did call?
447
00:24:00,480 --> 00:24:02,479
Shit.
448
00:24:02,480 --> 00:24:04,720
Well, why did you call me?
449
00:24:06,120 --> 00:24:08,039
Well, maybe I just called you back.
450
00:24:08,040 --> 00:24:10,039
OK, well, you've done that. Bye.
451
00:24:10,040 --> 00:24:12,450
- Well, maybe I had something
to tell you. - What?
452
00:24:12,451 --> 00:24:16,039
Well, you won't know
if you don't answer my calls.
453
00:24:16,040 --> 00:24:18,839
Did you call to apologise
for being a big, fat Judas?
454
00:24:18,840 --> 00:24:21,959
- No!
- Well, then, I'm not interested. - Oh, I think you will be interested!
455
00:24:21,960 --> 00:24:24,840
Oh, I think I'm not interested!
Bye! Get off my drive!
456
00:24:28,400 --> 00:24:30,799
Because I was calling to tell you...
457
00:24:30,800 --> 00:24:32,760
..you were right about Steve.
458
00:24:38,120 --> 00:24:40,559
Yes, I was right about Steve.
459
00:24:40,560 --> 00:24:42,120
Obviously!
460
00:24:42,491 --> 00:24:48,439
So, Dave said these radios
are notoriously easy to scramble.
461
00:24:48,440 --> 00:24:50,239
Haven't been in service for years.
462
00:24:50,240 --> 00:24:52,119
And there was a guy
at the briefing...
463
00:24:52,120 --> 00:24:53,919
Now, I can't be sure
464
00:24:53,920 --> 00:24:57,039
but I think it was the guy
that we saw meeting Steve.
465
00:24:57,040 --> 00:24:58,439
What was he doing at the briefing?
466
00:24:58,440 --> 00:25:00,599
They said he was from a local
residents' association.
467
00:25:00,600 --> 00:25:03,519
Yeah, bullshit - he's another
one of Steve's day players.
468
00:25:03,520 --> 00:25:06,279
OK. So,
Steve wants to scramble the radios.
469
00:25:06,280 --> 00:25:08,959
Probably to stop the police
from responding to a terror attack.
470
00:25:08,960 --> 00:25:11,959
- What do we do?
- We need to get this information to Fisher, like, fast.
471
00:25:11,960 --> 00:25:13,919
How?! We lost our jobs!
472
00:25:13,920 --> 00:25:15,399
- RECORDED MESSAGE:
- You've called MI5,
473
00:25:15,400 --> 00:25:17,879
your national security service.
For careers, press one.
474
00:25:17,880 --> 00:25:20,999
- To report a security concern,
press two. - Press two, press two.
475
00:25:21,000 --> 00:25:22,359
You may find it quicker and easier
476
00:25:22,360 --> 00:25:25,159
- to report your concern
on our website. - Oh, God! Come on!
477
00:25:25,160 --> 00:25:27,399
Hello, you're through to MI5,
all calls may be recorded...
478
00:25:27,400 --> 00:25:30,559
Hi, er, yes,
I need to speak to Joanna Fisher,
479
00:25:30,560 --> 00:25:33,599
Deputy Director of Intelligence.
This is urgent. We think that
480
00:25:33,600 --> 00:25:35,839
something's going to happen
at Notting Hill Carnival tomorrow.
481
00:25:35,840 --> 00:25:38,359
Right, well, we can't put people
through to specific members of...
482
00:25:38,360 --> 00:25:43,239
No, no, no, you don't understand,
I'm an agent. I'm a former agent.
483
00:25:43,240 --> 00:25:45,319
Do you have an active agent number?
484
00:25:45,320 --> 00:25:48,079
- No, but I...
- Then I'll have to put this down as a public tip-off.
485
00:25:48,080 --> 00:25:49,319
OK, listen, I just think...
486
00:25:49,320 --> 00:25:51,399
We've had quite a few of those
about Carnival.
487
00:25:51,400 --> 00:25:53,479
It's the full moon, I swear!
It brings them all out.
488
00:25:53,480 --> 00:25:54,960
Yeah, fine, OK, thanks, bye!
489
00:25:54,961 --> 00:25:58,719
All right. Fisher's going to be
in the office tomorrow morning.
490
00:25:58,720 --> 00:26:00,719
- It's Bank Holiday Monday.
BOTH: - Time and a half.
491
00:26:00,720 --> 00:26:03,039
I will go there in person
and make them listen.
492
00:26:03,040 --> 00:26:04,559
So, what am I going to do?
493
00:26:04,560 --> 00:26:07,839
I was supposed to be on the float
tomorrow. I do the count-ins.
494
00:26:07,840 --> 00:26:09,359
Cordell does them too fast.
495
00:26:09,360 --> 00:26:11,839
It falls apart before we get to
the chorus of Red Red Wine!
496
00:26:11,840 --> 00:26:14,079
Kay, just...just go. All right?
497
00:26:14,080 --> 00:26:16,279
I will pass on what we know
to Fisher
498
00:26:16,280 --> 00:26:17,759
and she'll take care of the rest.
499
00:26:17,760 --> 00:26:19,719
I mean, it's like you said -
it's MI5, right?
500
00:26:19,720 --> 00:26:21,319
This is just another day
in the office for them.
501
00:26:21,320 --> 00:26:24,120
Whatever Steve's planning,
they will stop it.
502
00:26:38,040 --> 00:26:40,999
- Stop right there.
- OK, Mo, I have vital information
503
00:26:41,000 --> 00:26:43,159
that I need to pass onto Fisher.
It's urgent!
504
00:26:43,160 --> 00:26:44,919
What is it? I'll pass it on.
505
00:26:44,920 --> 00:26:47,239
Yeah, no offence, Mo,
but you're not cleared for this.
506
00:26:47,240 --> 00:26:49,479
Says a lady who handed over
state secrets.
507
00:26:49,480 --> 00:26:52,280
- How did you know about that?!
- Brenda told me.
508
00:26:53,720 --> 00:26:55,159
Goddamn it, Brenda!
509
00:26:55,160 --> 00:27:00,320
OK, Mo, this is a matter of national
security, all right? Please!
510
00:27:03,351 --> 00:27:05,439
RADIO BEEPS
511
00:27:05,440 --> 00:27:09,880
Got Dominique Archibald. Wants to
speak to Fisher. Says it's urgent.
512
00:27:11,120 --> 00:27:12,170
Repeat.
513
00:27:14,960 --> 00:27:17,239
You've got 30 seconds.
This better be good.
514
00:27:17,240 --> 00:27:20,119
OK, this is big.
Potentially really big, right?
515
00:27:20,120 --> 00:27:22,120
So, we discovered that the ra...
516
00:27:27,840 --> 00:27:29,999
Well?
517
00:27:30,000 --> 00:27:31,480
What is it?
518
00:27:33,840 --> 00:27:35,040
Er...
519
00:27:35,090 --> 00:27:39,640
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