Original subtitles

It is estimated that there are some 10 quintillion insects alive

at any one time.

But forget about them. This is about me, Lloyd.

I'm a fly!

How did I not know about this?

You've got a tickle spot. Don't be embarrassed.

It's not that. There's a...

It's instinctive. We can't help our instincts.

Err.

Ah!

Abacus, what's on my head?

Before I tell you,

I think it's a baby one, so try not to panic.

Ha-ha.

Ah! Spider! It's a spider!

A spider. It's a spider! Is it still there?

Has it gone? Where is it?!

Did you see her parachute?

That means she's just left the egg sac

and set out into the world.

Stop being fascinated and start being terrified.

Get rid of it! I understand, Lloyd.

Fear of spiders, even baby ones, is natural for flies.

Like you'd say, we can't help our instincts.

What? I'm not scared, I'm sensible.

Eating flies is that thing's natural spider instinct.

Ha!

I think she's actually kind of sweet.

Ahh, it's eating me! It's eating me! It's...

It doesn't hurt. She's so young.

I imagine her fangs haven't fully developed yet.

Ah. Abacus, what if I could train this spider's instincts?

If I train her right, show her how tasty fruit and veg can be,

by the time she's capable of eating me, she won't want to.

I don't think that will be easy.

But think of the consequences when I succeed.

Imagine a world where flies and spiders

could live together in peace and harmony.

All thanks to me.

That does sound nice.

Commencing world-changing social experiment, day one.

Subject is...

Is that a little baby spider?

Oh, who's a cutie-patootie, then?

Crabbie Spindles is not a pet, PB.

Crabbie Spindles?

Oh, because she's a crab spider?

What? No. Crabbie Spindles was the name of our great-aunt.

And she, like Crabbie Spindles here, never ate meat.

Only 'cause it made her trump like a trombone.

But spiders do eat meat.

And nothing else.

Not this one. We are changing the world with this spider.

Mr and Mrs Lloyd will be so proud when they hear.

Um, actually, maybe don't tell Mum and Dad

until after we've changed the world.

They're not exactly spider fans.

But she's so cute.

Hmm.

I won't tell. I'm in.

Thank you, PB. So, what's up first?

This foodstuff A, mashed apple.

Continue.

She won't eat apple. It's not a meat.

Oof, yes. That's the point, PB.

Come on, Crabbie Spindles.

It's delicious. Look. Ah...

Mmm, it really is delicious.

How'd you get it so sweet and gooey?

I pre-chewed it.

Moving on. What's foodstuff B?

Pre-chewed baked bean.

No! No, no!

Hmm.

No!

Huh. So that's a no for tomato.

What column does that go in? Fruit or vegetable?

It's a matter of some debate. Oh! Give her some ham.

She'll eat that. How many times, PB?

Ham is not a vegetable.

But it's... Ugh.

This calls for a more scientific approach.

Hello. I'm Floyd.

I'm a nummy fly.

Oh.

I thought we were trying to stop Crabbie Spindles eating flies.

Ah, but remember, Floyd's not a real fly,

just a perfect replica.

When Crabbie Spindle's instincts make her try to eat Floyd,

she'll find him completely inedible,

give up on flies and become a vegetarian.

Whoo, come on, Crabbie Spindles. Nummy fly.

No. Look how tasty it is.

Mmm. Num-num-num-num-num.

You're not fooling her, Lloyd. She's too smart.

Ahhh. Hmm.

See? Nummy.

Hmm.

Ah. Take a big bite of fly.

Ugh.

Ah, not me! The other fly, Floyd!

I'm too tasty.

We need a scientific breakthrough before her teeth break through.

Aw. She's getting sleepy.

It must be her bedtime.

Hmm. I suppose a scientific breakthrough can wait till morning.

Crabbie Spindles will be nice and comfy in there, Lloyd.

It's not about comfort, Abacus.

These are controlled scientific conditions.

Although she will be nice and comfy. Wait, where is she?

I got her ready for bed. She's proper snoozy now.

She's not a pet, PB. This is a social experiment.

You're not supposed to get attached.

Go on, clear off.

Night-night, test subject.

Sleepy time, Crabbie Spindles. Big day tomorrow.

We're gonna push back the frontiers of insect knowledge, aren't we?

Yes, we are. Oh. Yeah.

Yes, we are.

Huh? What's that noise? Huh?

Crabbie Spindles?

Open wide. Yeah.

Here you go. PB!

I should've known. You can't keep your hands off her.

Crabbie Spindles was hungry. Weren't you, Crabbie Spindles?

Sorry. You got Crabbie Spindles to eat?

Brilliant. What did she eat?

I need to record this.

Apple? Bean? Cucumber?

Ham.

Mmmmm. Ham. Ham?

Meaty ham?

Yeah. She loves it. Yay.

What? No. No, no, no.

PB, you have ruined the entire experiment.

She would have been eating vegetables any day now.

Agh. I was so close!

Yeah.

No, Crabbie Spindles. No ham!

Ow! Not me either. Ow!

Ow! Ow! Agh. Agh.

That really hurt.

Oh, her little fangs must be coming through.

Yeah, not so little.

Yeah. Ha.

Oh, what's all this shouting?

Is this a dream, or is that a spider in the house?

It's not a dream, it's a social experiment.

Ow! OW! Stop that! Bad Crabbie Spindles!

So just to be clear, there's a spider loose in the house?

I think she's still hungry.

The maggots!

It's OK. She only eats ham?

And Lloyd, so far.

Hmm. I can't wait to hear you explain this one.

But first, we need to catch a spider.

Crabbie Spindles.

Crabbie Spindles, where are you?

Maggots! I've counted them up.

All present and uneaten.

Ha!

I think I hear her.

Crabbie Spindles?

Are you... Oof.

Oh. Clever girl.

Ha, got ya! Whoo! Ah!

Whoo! Whoa.

Oh, no.

What was that? Did you find her?

Yes, I caught her in a box.

Yeah, but the box escaped with the last of the ham with her.

No, not the ham!

There must be something else we can tempt her out with.

Hmm.

Crabbie Spindles?

Look, Crabbie Spindles. It's my nummy arm.

Such a nummy arm. Waving around, free for the chewing.

Wait.

Ham. Mm... Still warm.

Ahh!

Eww.

No, no! No, no, no, no, no.

Do not eat me, Crabbie Spindles! Do not eat me!

Ha-yee.

Got ya, cheeky little thing!

Cheeky? She was trying to eat me. Again.

Aw. She really likes you.

Mum, Dad, can we keep her, please?

She... she's joking, right?

Uh... No.

If my experiment has proved anything,

it is that Crabbie Spindles has an unchangeable taste for fly.

Which technically still counts as success.

Subject did not respond to vegetable stimuli.

Remains a meat eater. Experiment concluded.

Listen, this is Crabbie Spindles.

We're trying to get her not to eat fly,

and we didn't really succeed, but I just...

At least you try to minimise your fly intake, Julie.

And never those I'm friends with.

So maybe you could look after little Crabbie Spindles for me?

Oh. I'm flattered, but she doesn't need looking after, Lloyd.

Us spiders are independent the moment we leave the egg sac.

Oh, but I can keep an eye on her.

Well, thank you. Uh, go on, then, Crabbie Spindles.

Time for you to head off and...

...eat whatever you think's best.

Haa.

Ooh!

Ah!

I'll take her for a nap.

Wheee!

Bye, Crabbie Spindles!

You were a great test subject. I'll miss you.

I know what might cheer you up.

Huh. Oh.

Doesn't work when I do it.

Oh.

I didn't know Abacus had a tickle spot.

He always knows how to cheer me up.

Captions by Red Bee Media

Copyright Australian Broadcasting Corporation