Original subtitles

It is estimated that there are some 10 quintillion insects

alive at any one time.

But forget about them. This is about ME - Lloyd!

I'm a fly!

Oof!

What is it?

I have no idea.

It was just sitting here when I came in.

Is it... dangerous?

No idea.

It doesn't look dangerous.

You should poke it and see.

What? YOU poke it.

Your arms are longer, so, you can stay a safer distance.

It's so adorable!

Yeah, it is kind of cute.

Oh, no, not another one.

Gena!

Oh, dear.

You know what this is?

Oh, it's a hardy tardy.

We don't know where they come from or what they are,

they just turn up now and then and make themselves at home.

Can we keep it?! Can we keep it?!

It can stay in my room!

No, PB, I found it. It will stay in my room.

I will look after it.

We don't think that's a good idea.

Oh, great.

So, now you don't think I can look after a single living creature.

That's not it. It's easier to show you.

Those are all hardy tardies?

What happened to them? We don't know.

Every one was well looked-after by one of your older siblings,

but they just died.

Never took long. Never worked out why.

But it happened every time.

We just don't want you two going through the same ordeal.

So, what you are saying

is my brothers and sisters

were all rubbish at looking after hardy tardies.

Uh... That's really not what I...

Well, I won't be!

And this hardy tardy will live a long and happy life!

Well, don't say we didn't warn you.

Huh?

You will live here with me, Nut Bum.

'Nut Bum'?!

Yeah, it's got a bum shaped like a nut.

Haven't you, Nut Bum?

Yes, you have, haven't you, Nut Bum?

Yes, you have!

Make yourself at home.

Uh...

Agh! Out we go!

This is the outside, Nut Bum.

You can do all your pees and poops out here,

hundreds and hundreds of them

over a long and happy life.

Nut Bum!

Nut Bum?

You know what? If I'm going to keep you safe,

we should start with some important safety lessons.

That is glass.

You can't see it, but it IS there, so, don't go running at it...

...or you might get...

Nut Bum! Nah.

I'm Graham.

Nut Bum?

Spiders.

Never go near a...

Nut Bum!

Ugh! Chewy!

Oh! Ooh, juicy.

Batteries or anything big, cylindrical and horizontal.

They look harmless, but...

Nut Bum!

Gaps in floorboards.

Nut Bum!

Squeak if you're OK!

That's enough safety lessons for today. It's too dangerous.

Much safer in here.

Dad!

Mum, Dad just sat on Nut Bum!

I heard. Honestly, your father...

You'd think he'd have more awareness of a little...

Hey.

Oh.

Unbelievable!

It's hard enough keeping Nut Bum safe

without Dad sitting on Nut Bum and you trying to mash...

PB!

What?

Oh! I thought it was a bit of apple!

It's no wonder all the other hardy tardies died.

This place is a hardy tardy deathtrap!

Oh, don't be melodramatic.

It'll take more than that to see one off.

Hardy tardies are a very tough. That's why we call them hardy.

Why do you call them tardy?

Not sure. That's just what Cornea called them.

I must be vigilant. No harm will come to Nut Bum under my watch.

Ow!

There! Here you go, Nut Bum.

A safe little home where no-one can sit on you, mash you

or accidentally eat,

no sharp corners, all soft furnishings,

you've got a wheel for exercise, food bowl,

the sofa folds out into a bed.

Sticks a bit, but I can look at that.

Goodnight, Nut Bum.

We can write off today's missteps and start again tomorrow.

Ah!

Rise and shine, Nut Bum!

Today is the first day of your long and happy life!

Nut...

...Bum?

Every time.

I don't understand.

Aside from a few bumps, I took good care of Nut Bum.

I'm sorry, Lloyd.

Tardies may be hardy, but they must just have very short lifespans.

There's nothing you could have done.

I wrote a eulogy I could read, if you like.

Nut Bum, we will miss you.

You may have been just one among many,

but to me you were the best.

I'll never find another friend like you.

I won't forget the twitch of your wings

or the way you laughed when I fell into the bath.

Abacus, you've crossed MY name out

and written 'Nut Bum'.

Why do you have a eulogy ready-written for ME?

I'd be too upset to write one AFTER your death.

But what if I outlive you?

Come on, Lloyd. Be serious.

I outlived Nut Bum!

Maybe I'll outlive everyone I care about and die alone!

I didn't mean THAT serious.

It wasn't your fault, Lloyd.

How would YOU know?

Maybe it was. We have no idea what happened. How could we?

I know - we could dig Nut Bum up

and perform an autopsy to determine the cause of death.

Will that cheer you up?

No!

It wouldn't help. We don't know enough about hardy tardies

for an autopsy to provide definitive results anyhow.

WE don't, but Cornea might.

Mum said Cornea called them 'hardy tardies',

so, she knows more about them than WE do at least.

Tardies...

Oh, yes! Tardigrades! Adorable little things.

You found one, have you?

We did, but it died.

Oh, my. How did you manage that?

We didn't. It was alive and then - pooh! - dead.

Remarkable.

I've never heard of a tardy just dying.

They're ever so hardy. Almost impossible to kill.

Not that I've tried.

I just pop them back in the water tank or somewhere soggy.

Water tank?

They do LOVE the water. Stops them drying out.

Oh, you must have noticed how they dry out

and turn into cute little beans.

Pop them back into water and they're right as rain.

Nut Bum!

Not staying for an onion smoothie?

Sorry, Cornea, I think we may have buried Nut Bum alive.

Shall I...get the spade?

I've got a better idea.

What's going on? Why is there no...

Now look what you've...

Agh!

Nut Bum is alive!

The gardy tardies are all alive!

Oh, it's so good to have you back, Nut Bum.

and all your hardy tardy friends!

Ooh!

Agh!

Ooh!

Agh!

I can't live like this!

Hey, I did pretty good.

My hardy tardy was buried alive for less time than any of the others.

Weren't you, Nut Bum?

Yes, you were. Barely any time at all.

You know we can't keep them.

They'll just keep drying out.

So, we just rehydrate them.

And use up all the water?

No, they need somewhere wet.

NOT the water tank.

Fine.

Time to say goodbye, Nut Bum.

But don't you worry -

below us is an entire reservoir of dribbled-down bin juice

for you to live a long and happy life.

You enjoyed our time together and you'll never forget me?

Heh. Thank you, Nut Bum.

Goodbye.

I didn't know you could speak tardigrade.

I don't. Just guessing.

But I'm going to assume Nut Bum said that. For closure.

Hey, Nut Bum! You better not forget me either!

And come visit!

Do you wanna hear the rest of my eulogy?

Uh... No, thanks.

Captions by Red Bee Media

Copyright Australian Broadcasting Corporation