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1
00:00:04,040 --> 00:00:06,040
Look how good that is. Yeah!
2
00:00:07,080 --> 00:00:09,400
OK, who wants an arm wrestle?
I'm playing the winner!
3
00:00:10,920 --> 00:00:13,000
Aah! Whoa!
4
00:00:13,080 --> 00:00:15,080
OK, Dad, I'm filming.
5
00:00:15,520 --> 00:00:16,880
Are you filming, Sam?
6
00:00:16,960 --> 00:00:18,960
Yeah, you're shouting again!
7
00:00:19,040 --> 00:00:22,920
Yeah, it's this flipping ear,
it's blocked! It's blocked still!
8
00:00:23,000 --> 00:00:24,240
Yeah.
9
00:00:24,320 --> 00:00:26,240
Can you hurry up, please?
10
00:00:26,320 --> 00:00:27,480
DRUMMING
Robin!
11
00:00:27,560 --> 00:00:29,600
What? Ooh, no, hang on, I can hear -
I can hear that.
12
00:00:29,680 --> 00:00:31,360
You can hear that? Yeah.
13
00:00:31,440 --> 00:00:33,680
Agh, just get on with it, Dad.
14
00:00:33,760 --> 00:00:35,560
Honestly! Ha, ha, ha!
15
00:00:35,640 --> 00:00:37,760
OK, ahoy there, shipmates!
16
00:00:37,840 --> 00:00:40,560
It's Captain Long John Paul Jessop
here aboard...
17
00:00:40,640 --> 00:00:42,600
ROBIN LAUGHS
Now, then! Go on.
18
00:00:42,680 --> 00:00:45,440
..my old boat. Oi.
From when I was a boy!
19
00:00:45,520 --> 00:00:48,800
Yes, and today we're taking it upon
the seven seas for the first time
20
00:00:48,880 --> 00:00:51,360
since, er, I want to say, um...
When was Babylon Zoo?
21
00:00:51,440 --> 00:00:53,200
It doesn't matter,
can you hurry up, please?
22
00:00:53,280 --> 00:00:55,960
I need to get home to set up
for the party, for the students.
23
00:00:56,040 --> 00:00:58,440
All right, I'm just waiting for you
lot to embark.
24
00:00:58,520 --> 00:01:00,040
To what? Embark.
25
00:01:00,120 --> 00:01:01,600
What - what's embark again?
26
00:01:01,680 --> 00:01:04,240
Come aboard, get on the boat, Mum.
27
00:01:04,320 --> 00:01:06,680
Well, turn it on first,
see if it works.
28
00:01:06,760 --> 00:01:09,040
Turn it on? Yeah. It's not a Hoover.
29
00:01:09,120 --> 00:01:10,840
Start her up, I think you mean. OK.
30
00:01:10,920 --> 00:01:13,640
And you can't wear heels on an
inflatable vessel I'm afraid, Cherry,
31
00:01:13,720 --> 00:01:16,240
that's just asking for trouble.
In case it pops. Oh, my God.
32
00:01:16,320 --> 00:01:18,960
I am absolutely pumped about this,
to be fair to me.
33
00:01:19,040 --> 00:01:20,640
Start again, Paul.
34
00:01:20,720 --> 00:01:23,080
OK, Amy? This is really fun,
isn't it?
35
00:01:23,160 --> 00:01:24,560
No, it isn't, I don't want to go on.
36
00:01:24,640 --> 00:01:26,280
I feel like...not James Bond,
37
00:01:26,360 --> 00:01:28,880
but, you know, people who...
people who go on boats.
38
00:01:28,960 --> 00:01:30,720
Oh, Paul, give it some welly!
39
00:01:30,800 --> 00:01:32,640
Yeah, I'm giving it -
this is welly, Mum!
40
00:01:32,720 --> 00:01:35,200
This is what welly looks like.
Shall I ask one of the men to help?
41
00:01:35,280 --> 00:01:38,120
What do you mean?
I'm a man! I'm one of the men!
42
00:01:38,200 --> 00:01:41,280
No. Yeah, but, like,
one of the proper boat guys? Yeah.
43
00:01:41,360 --> 00:01:44,600
I'm a proper boat guy!
I'm a sailor man, mate.
44
00:01:44,680 --> 00:01:46,600
And it's not me -
my technique's spot on,
45
00:01:46,680 --> 00:01:50,120
it's just this, this pull cord's
really, really stiff.
46
00:01:50,200 --> 00:01:51,720
Come on, girl.
47
00:01:51,800 --> 00:01:53,280
Or I could have a go if you like?
48
00:01:53,360 --> 00:01:54,440
THEY GASP
49
00:01:54,520 --> 00:01:56,720
Oh, my God, Robin!
50
00:01:56,800 --> 00:01:58,480
Man over board!
51
00:01:58,560 --> 00:02:01,360
Robin!
PANICKED SHOUTING
52
00:02:01,440 --> 00:02:04,160
Oh, it's not that deep, actually.
I'm OK.
53
00:02:05,600 --> 00:02:06,720
PAUL GROANS
What's going on?
54
00:02:06,800 --> 00:02:07,960
Dad's hogging the toilet.
55
00:02:08,040 --> 00:02:09,560
Er, I'm not hogging the toilet, Amy,
56
00:02:09,640 --> 00:02:11,440
I'm trying to clean this
flipping earwax out -
57
00:02:11,520 --> 00:02:12,520
I think it's compacted.
58
00:02:12,600 --> 00:02:15,200
Well, yeah, of course it is, you
keep prodding it with cotton buds,
59
00:02:15,280 --> 00:02:16,680
what did you think it
was going to do?
60
00:02:16,760 --> 00:02:18,400
I just thought that
if I probed the left ear
61
00:02:18,480 --> 00:02:20,720
then the wax would eventually...
Come out the right one?
62
00:02:20,800 --> 00:02:23,800
Oh, yeah, ha, ha, mate. Ha, ha.
63
00:02:23,880 --> 00:02:26,240
Can you not film me while I'm
in the bathroom please, Sam?
64
00:02:26,320 --> 00:02:27,480
Why? Because of the nightie?
65
00:02:27,560 --> 00:02:32,040
No, because the bathroom is meant
to be a sanctuary, a safe space,
66
00:02:32,120 --> 00:02:34,040
not part of your documentary,
thank you.
67
00:02:34,120 --> 00:02:35,640
Why are you wearing a nightie,
in fact?
68
00:02:35,720 --> 00:02:37,280
It's not a nightie,
it's a long T-shirt.
69
00:02:37,360 --> 00:02:38,640
What's going on? I need the loo.
70
00:02:38,720 --> 00:02:39,680
Well, go on, then.
71
00:02:39,760 --> 00:02:42,080
No, I mean...properly.
72
00:02:42,160 --> 00:02:44,440
Urgh. Gross! Great, Mum,
thanks for telling us that.
73
00:02:44,520 --> 00:02:46,480
Well, he made me -
can you hurry up, please, Paul?
74
00:02:46,560 --> 00:02:48,280
Yeah, I'm just getting my earwax
out, babe.
75
00:02:48,360 --> 00:02:50,840
Oh, God, not this again.
Why are you so waxy?
76
00:02:50,920 --> 00:02:54,920
I am not "so" waxy, I just happen
to have a high functioning gland
77
00:02:55,000 --> 00:02:56,880
and a narrow ear canal.
78
00:02:56,960 --> 00:02:58,640
It's a bad design, frankly.
79
00:02:58,720 --> 00:02:59,960
What? The ear?
80
00:03:00,040 --> 00:03:01,520
Yes, the ear. Ugh.
81
00:03:01,600 --> 00:03:03,160
I need to unclog, pronto.
82
00:03:03,240 --> 00:03:04,480
If I can't hear properly
83
00:03:04,560 --> 00:03:06,560
then the police won't let me
on the training course
84
00:03:06,640 --> 00:03:07,920
and my medical's in four weeks.
85
00:03:08,000 --> 00:03:09,960
Yeah, well, I've got my lecture
in 25 minutes -
86
00:03:10,040 --> 00:03:11,720
and you're dropping me off! Yeah.
87
00:03:11,800 --> 00:03:14,480
Hello? Morning all!
88
00:03:14,560 --> 00:03:16,400
Morning, Mum. Oh, hi.
89
00:03:16,480 --> 00:03:18,480
Why has she got keys?
90
00:03:18,560 --> 00:03:20,320
Did you get her keys?
91
00:03:20,400 --> 00:03:22,400
I've brought crossed buns!
92
00:03:23,200 --> 00:03:24,880
Have you got your own keys, Mum?
93
00:03:24,960 --> 00:03:26,120
Why have you got your own keys?
94
00:03:26,200 --> 00:03:27,520
I got some cut.
95
00:03:27,600 --> 00:03:29,160
Um, sorry what do you mean
crossed buns?
96
00:03:29,240 --> 00:03:30,360
Do you mean hot crossed buns?
97
00:03:30,440 --> 00:03:32,000
No, these are cold.
98
00:03:32,080 --> 00:03:33,120
Oh...
99
00:03:33,200 --> 00:03:37,840
Now, then, Sammy, I thought
you were stopping doing your videos
100
00:03:37,920 --> 00:03:40,000
to concentrate on your GCSEs.
101
00:03:40,080 --> 00:03:44,760
Oh, yeah, no, I am.
I will, Granny, you know, soon.
102
00:03:44,840 --> 00:03:46,920
How did you cut your own key, Sue?
103
00:03:47,000 --> 00:03:49,480
Did you take a set from the house
without us knowing?
104
00:03:49,560 --> 00:03:53,440
Oh, don't put it like that, Rachel,
that makes it sound really sneaky.
105
00:03:53,520 --> 00:03:55,360
Well, it is really sneaky!
106
00:03:55,440 --> 00:03:57,680
Oh! Huh? Oh, Paul!
107
00:03:57,760 --> 00:04:00,240
Oh, put some undies on
for goodness' sake.
108
00:04:00,320 --> 00:04:01,440
Oh, Mum! For God...! Oh!
109
00:04:01,520 --> 00:04:04,200
Oh, no! But I've seen it all before.
110
00:04:04,280 --> 00:04:06,080
Yeah, not recently, you haven't.
God.
111
00:04:06,160 --> 00:04:08,680
Well, you've not changed much,
really. Well, that's not true.
112
00:04:08,760 --> 00:04:10,120
That's not true.
113
00:04:10,200 --> 00:04:13,920
And - and the law has changed,
that's actually upskirting.
114
00:04:14,000 --> 00:04:19,000
As per the voyeurism offences
act of 2019 it is a major crime.
115
00:04:19,080 --> 00:04:20,560
Oh, here we go, spot the copper.
116
00:04:20,640 --> 00:04:21,600
Well...
117
00:04:21,680 --> 00:04:24,240
Well, it's your fault
for wearing a nightie.
118
00:04:24,320 --> 00:04:27,760
Yeah, exactly. It's not a nightie,
it's a long T-shirt!
119
00:04:27,840 --> 00:04:30,200
That is a nightie,
that's what a nightie is.
120
00:04:30,280 --> 00:04:33,000
Find some pyjamas if you need to
wear something in bed.
121
00:04:33,080 --> 00:04:35,960
I'm not wearing pyjamas
like some kind of...
122
00:04:36,040 --> 00:04:37,280
..banana.
123
00:04:37,360 --> 00:04:39,120
Well, you need to cover your banana
124
00:04:39,200 --> 00:04:41,000
if you're going to stand
on the staircase.
125
00:04:41,080 --> 00:04:43,320
Oh, my God. Knock, knock! Robin.
Morning all.
126
00:04:43,400 --> 00:04:45,840
Aww. All right? Hey.
All right, Spielberg?
127
00:04:45,920 --> 00:04:48,280
Hey, Susan, come on,
give us a squeeze.
128
00:04:48,360 --> 00:04:53,400
Hiya, Robin. Now, then,
can I tempt you with a crossed bun?
129
00:04:53,480 --> 00:04:54,880
Urgh, yuck, don't like 'em.
130
00:04:54,960 --> 00:04:57,160
Just a cup of tea would be ideal,
thank you.
131
00:04:57,240 --> 00:04:58,880
We're not staying for long. No.
132
00:04:58,960 --> 00:05:00,520
Just need to use the printer,
if poss,
133
00:05:00,600 --> 00:05:02,240
print out Cherry's divorce papers.
Yeah.
134
00:05:02,320 --> 00:05:03,680
Oh, OK. Well, quickly, then.
135
00:05:03,760 --> 00:05:07,600
Divorce? I thought you
divorced Ian yonks ago, Cheryl.
136
00:05:07,680 --> 00:05:09,880
Mm. Well, I have been
trying to, so...
137
00:05:09,960 --> 00:05:13,600
..but he keeps refusing to sign
the divorce papers
138
00:05:13,680 --> 00:05:16,760
because he still loves me so much.
Selfish git. Oh, dear.
139
00:05:16,840 --> 00:05:19,000
Oh, he'll sign. I'll make him sign.
140
00:05:19,080 --> 00:05:21,880
I'm going to talk to the guy next
week, mano a mano.
141
00:05:21,960 --> 00:05:23,600
Yeah, and I'm going to come, an'
all.
142
00:05:23,680 --> 00:05:26,760
Yeah... Well, no, hang on, if you're
there it's not mano a mano is it?
143
00:05:26,840 --> 00:05:28,520
Then it's mano a mano a womano.
144
00:05:28,600 --> 00:05:32,040
Er, "mano" means hand in Italian.
145
00:05:32,120 --> 00:05:35,240
Oh... So... Er, just email me
the document I'll get it...
146
00:05:35,320 --> 00:05:37,560
I like the old, er...
What do you call them? Yeah, well...
147
00:05:37,640 --> 00:05:39,600
Hairy horns?
MIMICS CLOWN HORN
148
00:05:39,680 --> 00:05:42,000
Space buns. Yeah. They were quite
trendy last year. Right.
149
00:05:42,080 --> 00:05:43,080
And this year, no?
150
00:05:43,160 --> 00:05:45,640
She's trying to blend in with
the other freshers on her course.
151
00:05:45,720 --> 00:05:49,440
Mm. What? Are you still called a
fresher, Rachel, at your age? Yeah.
152
00:05:49,520 --> 00:05:52,160
I love that. Oh, ha, ha, thank you,
thank you for that, Sue, yeah.
153
00:05:52,240 --> 00:05:54,880
You know, ideologically, we're all
pretty much the same, so...
154
00:05:54,960 --> 00:05:56,840
Er, you're the weirdo
older student, Mum,
155
00:05:56,920 --> 00:05:58,720
you're not going to become
friends with them
156
00:05:58,800 --> 00:06:01,520
just because you put your hair in
a bun. It's two buns. And I might.
157
00:06:01,600 --> 00:06:03,880
Right. You won't. Hello.
You all right? Yeah, good, you?
158
00:06:03,960 --> 00:06:07,000
Right, well I'm going to get the
buns out! Ooh, er, missus.
159
00:06:07,080 --> 00:06:10,760
Amy, I haven't seen you
since you got back.
160
00:06:10,840 --> 00:06:12,640
Farvel. What?
161
00:06:12,720 --> 00:06:15,680
Farvel. Is it farvel?
Robin said it was farvel.
162
00:06:15,760 --> 00:06:17,000
Is it not? What's this farvel?
163
00:06:17,080 --> 00:06:18,120
It's hello in Danish, no?
164
00:06:18,200 --> 00:06:19,360
Yeah. I was in Norway.
165
00:06:19,440 --> 00:06:21,760
You... Oh, sorry, yes, Norge.
Yeah. Mm.
166
00:06:21,840 --> 00:06:24,320
Same sort of thing, innit?
A lot of white people on bikes.
167
00:06:24,400 --> 00:06:26,320
Um... Happy to be home, are ya?
168
00:06:26,400 --> 00:06:28,600
Nope, unhappy to be home.
169
00:06:28,680 --> 00:06:31,000
Aww. I want to go back
as soon as possible.
170
00:06:31,080 --> 00:06:32,800
Oh, come on, Amy, that's not true.
171
00:06:32,880 --> 00:06:36,240
Yeah - and in the meantime she's
been trying to turn the place into Oslo,
172
00:06:36,320 --> 00:06:39,240
hence all the scatter cushions
and trolls everywhere, urgh.
173
00:06:39,320 --> 00:06:42,320
Um, I'm trying to make the place
more hygge, yeah.
174
00:06:42,400 --> 00:06:44,240
Oh, here we go. What? More what?
175
00:06:44,320 --> 00:06:46,560
Hygge. It's Norwegian for cosy.
176
00:06:46,640 --> 00:06:49,000
Um, it's way more nuanced than
that. Mm-hm.
177
00:06:49,080 --> 00:06:51,520
She'll be putting an oil rig
in the garden next.
178
00:06:51,600 --> 00:06:53,760
Yeah - and charging us £40
for a beer. Yeah!
179
00:06:53,840 --> 00:06:56,360
Oh, ha, ha, funny.
180
00:06:56,440 --> 00:06:59,840
I mean, what's Norway got that you
can't find here, for goodness' sake?
181
00:06:59,920 --> 00:07:02,640
My friend Kare took me
out on his boat on the fjords.
182
00:07:02,720 --> 00:07:05,640
So? OK, but come on, there's
loads of great things here, Amy...
183
00:07:05,720 --> 00:07:08,600
Yeah! ..in the UK, you know
there's, there's...
184
00:07:08,680 --> 00:07:10,160
Er... Um...
185
00:07:10,240 --> 00:07:12,440
Norwich Castle's reopening. Yeah.
186
00:07:12,520 --> 00:07:13,680
New series of I'm A Celeb!
187
00:07:13,760 --> 00:07:15,280
And I - I've sold my house.
188
00:07:15,360 --> 00:07:16,520
Er, Carabao Cup Final.
189
00:07:16,600 --> 00:07:18,760
Er, Maya will be back from
university soon, so... Yeah.
190
00:07:18,840 --> 00:07:21,160
You sold your house?
I thought it was only under offer?
191
00:07:21,240 --> 00:07:23,040
Exchanged contracts on Thursday.
192
00:07:23,120 --> 00:07:25,320
Hey! Oh! That's good, innit?
193
00:07:25,400 --> 00:07:27,520
Why is that something for Amy
to look forward to?
194
00:07:27,600 --> 00:07:30,440
Well, you can all come
and help yourself to my gubbins.
195
00:07:30,520 --> 00:07:32,120
Gubbins, what do you mean, gubbins?
196
00:07:32,200 --> 00:07:34,960
Well, I've got to clear
everything out. Really?
197
00:07:35,040 --> 00:07:38,040
Oh, you'll love it, Amy,
a lot of it is very higgledy.
198
00:07:38,120 --> 00:07:41,440
- Hygge.
- Uh-huh, yeah. Like what?
199
00:07:41,520 --> 00:07:44,800
I've got doilies coming
out of my drawers.
200
00:07:44,880 --> 00:07:47,640
Oh-ho-ho-ho-ho!
201
00:07:47,720 --> 00:07:49,760
You meant...
Sorry, I thought you meant knickers.
202
00:07:49,840 --> 00:07:52,360
Robin. You've got doilies.
You've got doilies, Sue. I'm sorry.
203
00:07:52,440 --> 00:07:55,880
I've got doilies, cushions,
more gnomes.
204
00:07:55,960 --> 00:07:58,280
Oh, no, not gnomes,
the gnomes you can chuck.
205
00:07:58,360 --> 00:08:00,440
One of them
looks exactly like Paul, actually!
206
00:08:00,520 --> 00:08:02,880
Oh does it?
No, it doesn't. No, it doesn't.
207
00:08:02,960 --> 00:08:04,600
So, where are you moving to,
then, Granny?
208
00:08:04,680 --> 00:08:07,440
I want to buy a flat
but I can't find anywhere I like
209
00:08:07,520 --> 00:08:11,560
so I think I'll just have to rent
somewhere for the time being.
210
00:08:11,640 --> 00:08:13,080
You should move in here, Granny.
211
00:08:13,160 --> 00:08:16,280
Ha, ha! Well, no, no.
212
00:08:16,360 --> 00:08:19,000
No, that would be impractical,
I fear,
213
00:08:19,080 --> 00:08:21,000
it takes us
a month to use the bathroom,
214
00:08:21,080 --> 00:08:23,280
er, in the morning as it is,
do you know what I mean?
215
00:08:23,360 --> 00:08:26,160
Yeah, well I-I don't want to
get in the way.
216
00:08:26,240 --> 00:08:27,920
Um, tea for you, Rachel?
217
00:08:28,000 --> 00:08:30,040
Er, no, I'm all right, thanks, Sue,
I've got to go -
218
00:08:30,120 --> 00:08:32,520
um, as do you all, actually,
no offence.
219
00:08:32,600 --> 00:08:34,240
We've all got to go, sorry.
OK, um...
220
00:08:34,320 --> 00:08:35,560
There's your divorce papers.
221
00:08:35,640 --> 00:08:37,800
Thanks. Have you got
a takeaway cup for the tea?
222
00:08:37,880 --> 00:08:40,280
No, because this isn't Starbucks.
OK, hang on, then.
223
00:08:40,360 --> 00:08:42,480
He's downing it. Mate, don't...
224
00:08:42,560 --> 00:08:44,320
No, don't down it, you bell.
225
00:08:44,400 --> 00:08:45,880
"Farvel" means goodbye, by the way.
226
00:08:45,960 --> 00:08:47,320
Ah, OK. Oh, God.
227
00:08:47,400 --> 00:08:49,720
- Well, farvel!
- It's boiling hot. Argh!
228
00:08:51,480 --> 00:08:54,280
We can try again tomorrow, so...
Mm, well, maybe, yeah.
229
00:08:55,400 --> 00:08:57,040
Why are you going this way?
230
00:08:57,120 --> 00:08:58,680
Oh, I need to go to the chandler's.
231
00:08:58,760 --> 00:09:00,160
The what? He means the boat shop.
No.
232
00:09:00,240 --> 00:09:01,800
Yeah, I need to get
a new pull cord... No.
233
00:09:01,880 --> 00:09:04,520
..and we need some engine oil, so...
No, I need - I need to get home.
234
00:09:04,600 --> 00:09:07,800
Oh, and we should get some
olive oil for your ear, Paul.
235
00:09:07,880 --> 00:09:09,800
Well, they won't sell
that at the chandler's.
236
00:09:09,880 --> 00:09:11,600
Olive oil?
What are you talking about?
237
00:09:11,680 --> 00:09:15,560
If you pour olive oil in your ear
it'll get rid of the wax.
238
00:09:15,640 --> 00:09:16,840
Yeah, great idea, Mum!
239
00:09:16,920 --> 00:09:18,560
Maybe if I squirt some
mayonnaise up my bum
240
00:09:18,640 --> 00:09:21,240
it'll sort out my constipation.
Urgh. Ugh, Dad.
241
00:09:21,320 --> 00:09:23,440
Well, putting less of it
in your mouth might help, yes.
242
00:09:23,520 --> 00:09:25,040
And - and we've got
olive oil at home.
243
00:09:25,120 --> 00:09:27,160
Yes, but we don't have engine oil,
244
00:09:27,240 --> 00:09:29,000
so we do need to go to the
chandler's.
245
00:09:29,080 --> 00:09:32,840
Also I need to buy a buoy.
What? What do you mean?
246
00:09:32,920 --> 00:09:34,600
Like a...a cabin boy? No! What?!
247
00:09:34,680 --> 00:09:37,240
No, it's like a bouncy, floaty thing
248
00:09:37,320 --> 00:09:38,920
that protects the boat.
PHONE VIBRATES
249
00:09:39,000 --> 00:09:40,680
I'm not trying to buy a male child,
Mum.
250
00:09:40,760 --> 00:09:44,200
It's inflatable,
the whole boat is basically a buoy,
251
00:09:44,280 --> 00:09:46,680
we do not need to go
to the boat shop.
252
00:09:46,760 --> 00:09:49,280
Oh, for God's sake... Chandler's.
253
00:09:49,360 --> 00:09:51,720
Aww... What is it? Another one
of the students drop out?
254
00:09:51,800 --> 00:09:54,680
No, it-it's this party, they just
keep leaving the WhatsApp group,
255
00:09:54,760 --> 00:09:56,840
they don't even say they can't come,
they just leave.
256
00:09:56,920 --> 00:09:59,400
I mean, should I add them again?
They might've left by mistake.
257
00:09:59,480 --> 00:10:01,560
No. Definitely not,
that's really lame.
258
00:10:01,640 --> 00:10:03,440
I'm going to write good riddance.
259
00:10:03,520 --> 00:10:04,520
No, don't do anything,
260
00:10:04,600 --> 00:10:07,000
you'll just scare off
the stragglers still on there.
261
00:10:07,080 --> 00:10:08,040
INDICATOR TICKS
262
00:10:08,120 --> 00:10:10,480
No, no, I said - we're, we're not
going to the boat shop, Paul.
263
00:10:10,560 --> 00:10:12,800
It's the chandler's! No! No!
I need a new pull cord... No!
264
00:10:12,880 --> 00:10:14,760
..and it's the chandler's.
We've got to go home!
265
00:10:14,840 --> 00:10:16,720
Rachel, please! Please!
Why are you doing this?
266
00:10:16,800 --> 00:10:17,800
Oh, my God. Why? Why now?!
267
00:10:17,880 --> 00:10:20,080
I'm just going to get a pull cord
and a little buoy. God!
268
00:10:23,760 --> 00:10:24,880
Oh, my God!
269
00:10:24,960 --> 00:10:26,560
The likeness is uncanny.
270
00:10:26,640 --> 00:10:28,240
No, it isn't, it just has a beard.
271
00:10:28,320 --> 00:10:29,800
It looks exactly like you, Dad!
272
00:10:29,880 --> 00:10:31,720
Why are you laughing, Mum?
You married him.
273
00:10:31,800 --> 00:10:33,240
Yeah, no, fair point.
274
00:10:33,320 --> 00:10:35,400
Huh? Hey, hold that, Paul. What?
275
00:10:36,440 --> 00:10:38,720
Oh, no, stop it, stop it!
276
00:10:38,800 --> 00:10:40,880
Right, give me that,
I'm taking it to the skip.
277
00:10:40,960 --> 00:10:42,320
Oh, no, don't, I want to keep that.
278
00:10:42,400 --> 00:10:43,920
Agh, ngh...
279
00:10:44,000 --> 00:10:45,080
Oh, gosh, are you OK?
280
00:10:45,160 --> 00:10:46,640
No, my ear's blocked again.
281
00:10:46,720 --> 00:10:48,920
Agh, am I clicking,
am I clicking guys?
282
00:10:49,000 --> 00:10:50,560
Oh, wicked, is that a Super 8?
283
00:10:50,640 --> 00:10:53,960
Oh, no, it's a camera,
that's your grandad's old cine one.
284
00:10:54,040 --> 00:10:56,960
Can I have it?
Give me that, Paul, I'll take that.
285
00:10:57,040 --> 00:10:58,200
Granny, can I have the camera?
286
00:10:58,280 --> 00:10:59,720
Anything you like the look of?
287
00:10:59,800 --> 00:11:01,440
Yeah, of course. For your room?
288
00:11:01,520 --> 00:11:02,800
Nope.
289
00:11:02,880 --> 00:11:05,480
We could, er, redecorate,
if you like?
290
00:11:05,560 --> 00:11:08,440
Oh, what, you think a Toby jug
and a horse brass
291
00:11:08,520 --> 00:11:11,160
is going to make me
not want to go back to Norway?
292
00:11:11,240 --> 00:11:12,680
No, that's not what I'm saying, Amy,
293
00:11:12,760 --> 00:11:15,000
I'm just asking you to be a bit more
positive, if you can,
294
00:11:15,080 --> 00:11:17,080
about being back - you know,
I know Norway was great
295
00:11:17,160 --> 00:11:19,520
and it'll take time to adjust,
but...
296
00:11:19,600 --> 00:11:21,440
Oh, there's a foot spa,
that might help!
297
00:11:21,520 --> 00:11:24,560
I'm having the foot spa! No, I was
going to give it to... Oh, my God!
298
00:11:24,640 --> 00:11:25,880
Look who I found!
299
00:11:25,960 --> 00:11:29,200
Oi-oi. Oh, no! Oh, my God, Robin,
you've got a black eye!
300
00:11:29,280 --> 00:11:31,720
Yeah. I have, I know I have, yeah.
Oh! Yeah.
301
00:11:31,800 --> 00:11:33,960
Yeah, Ian did it
in their mano a mano.
302
00:11:34,040 --> 00:11:35,560
Oh, no. Oh, Robin!
303
00:11:35,640 --> 00:11:37,440
Well, I hope you smacked him back!
304
00:11:37,520 --> 00:11:39,480
Oh, grow up! "Smacked him back!"
305
00:11:39,560 --> 00:11:40,880
Yeah, did you smack him back?
306
00:11:40,960 --> 00:11:43,080
I didn't, no, I didn't want to
stoop to his level, so...
307
00:11:43,160 --> 00:11:45,240
Ian's quite stacked.
Yeah, but that's not why, babe,
308
00:11:45,320 --> 00:11:47,920
I could've hit him, I could've
probably killed him, if I wanted to.
309
00:11:48,000 --> 00:11:50,040
- Really?
- But...yeah. Just a bit, just...
310
00:11:50,120 --> 00:11:52,000
..job done. But, no,
it's better this way,
311
00:11:52,080 --> 00:11:53,560
with him as the sole aggressor
312
00:11:53,640 --> 00:11:55,440
because, er, now he has to agree
to the divorce
313
00:11:55,520 --> 00:11:57,440
in exchange for me
not pressing charges. Oh...
314
00:11:57,520 --> 00:12:00,440
Yeah, it's actually worked out well.
Yeah. Apart from his minging eye.
315
00:12:00,520 --> 00:12:01,640
Yeah. Yeah. Yeah.
316
00:12:01,720 --> 00:12:04,040
So, how's this house clearance
thing work then, Sue?
317
00:12:04,120 --> 00:12:05,560
We can just take anything, can we?
318
00:12:05,640 --> 00:12:06,920
Yeah, pretty much, yeah.
319
00:12:07,000 --> 00:12:09,400
Yeah, not that, though,
that's my handbag.
320
00:12:09,480 --> 00:12:11,800
Yeah, I didn't want it anyway.
OK, great.
321
00:12:11,880 --> 00:12:15,680
And if you could help me chuck these
armchairs in the skip that'd be fab.
322
00:12:15,760 --> 00:12:17,280
Oh, no,
you're not getting rid
323
00:12:17,360 --> 00:12:18,720
of the old armchairs are you, Mum?!
324
00:12:18,800 --> 00:12:21,480
You're shouting again, Dad. Huh?
325
00:12:21,560 --> 00:12:25,680
Oh, wow, Sue, you've got one of
the old deep pan TVs, love it.
326
00:12:25,760 --> 00:12:27,680
Oh, and tapes, look!
327
00:12:27,760 --> 00:12:29,960
Here, Rach, you should show
these to your students,
328
00:12:30,040 --> 00:12:31,520
these are well in right now. Yeah.
329
00:12:31,600 --> 00:12:34,560
What? Tapes? Are they? Yeah. Yeah?
330
00:12:34,640 --> 00:12:36,400
I mean, everything goes in cycles,
don't it?
331
00:12:36,480 --> 00:12:38,920
Tapes, crop tops, Sugababes -
it's basically the '90s again.
332
00:12:39,000 --> 00:12:42,120
Um, I'm not sure Simply Red
specifically are back,
333
00:12:42,200 --> 00:12:45,280
but, yeah, by all means, put it on
when they come over. Oh, OK.
334
00:12:45,360 --> 00:12:48,320
What's this, what's this?
The students are coming over, is it?
335
00:12:48,400 --> 00:12:49,800
House party! Mm, sort of.
336
00:12:49,880 --> 00:12:52,640
Actually, Dean and Jelson are
aggressively single at the moment...
337
00:12:52,720 --> 00:12:55,320
No. ..if you want some blokes to
just, you know... Absolutely not.
338
00:12:55,400 --> 00:12:57,680
Babe. ..get things going, you know?
No, I don't want that.
339
00:12:57,760 --> 00:12:59,560
It's not really that sort of
evening, anyway,
340
00:12:59,640 --> 00:13:01,960
we're just going to eat moussaka
and chill. What?!
341
00:13:02,040 --> 00:13:03,800
What? Moussaka?
342
00:13:03,880 --> 00:13:06,080
Students don't want to
eat moussaka, Rach.
343
00:13:06,160 --> 00:13:08,320
Why not? Is that not a...?
What's wrong with moussaka?
344
00:13:08,400 --> 00:13:09,480
Aubergines.
345
00:13:09,560 --> 00:13:11,520
The moussaka thing is a bit shit,
to be fair, Mum.
346
00:13:11,600 --> 00:13:14,760
Well, OK - and I was going to bake
a lemon drizzle. Oh, my God, no.
347
00:13:14,840 --> 00:13:17,680
Rach, Rach, it sounds -
no offence - lemon jizzle.
348
00:13:17,760 --> 00:13:19,600
You need to do a drinking game
or something,
349
00:13:19,680 --> 00:13:21,840
you know, to break the ice a bit.
Mm?
350
00:13:21,920 --> 00:13:25,040
What's this rubber thing in here?
Oh, that's the old boat.
351
00:13:25,120 --> 00:13:27,240
What? That wants skipping,
as well, Paul.
352
00:13:27,320 --> 00:13:28,600
Hey, what the...?
353
00:13:28,680 --> 00:13:30,400
We're not chucking out the boat!
The boat?!
354
00:13:30,480 --> 00:13:31,720
Er, boat? What boat?
355
00:13:31,800 --> 00:13:33,000
You've got a boat?
356
00:13:33,080 --> 00:13:35,680
Yeah, I've got a boat.
Big time. My old boat. OK.
357
00:13:35,760 --> 00:13:38,000
Me and Daddy used to have some
great times in that baby.
358
00:13:38,080 --> 00:13:40,680
Daddy?
Doing what? Fishing?
359
00:13:40,760 --> 00:13:43,160
Huh? No, no, pootling.
360
00:13:43,240 --> 00:13:45,160
Yeah, razzing around the marina.
361
00:13:45,240 --> 00:13:47,320
Yeah, it's a
serious bit of kit that, Sam.
362
00:13:47,400 --> 00:13:48,920
It's a blow up dinghy, innit?
363
00:13:49,000 --> 00:13:51,440
Er, no, it is a rigid
inflatable boat, thank you.
364
00:13:51,520 --> 00:13:52,480
She is not a dinghy.
365
00:13:52,560 --> 00:13:54,600
There's an engine round here
somewhere, should be.
366
00:13:54,680 --> 00:13:56,080
Oh, we should -
we should take it out.
367
00:13:56,160 --> 00:13:57,800
Well, hang on a sec
because we've got to...
368
00:13:57,880 --> 00:13:59,200
Yeah, Amy might like it, you know,
369
00:13:59,280 --> 00:14:01,000
it might stop her
going on about the fjords.
370
00:14:01,080 --> 00:14:03,400
Oh, I doubt it's still seaworthy,
Rachel.
371
00:14:03,480 --> 00:14:05,680
Oh, she's still seaworthy, all
right!
372
00:14:05,760 --> 00:14:09,040
It's not even bin worthy,
it's covered in mould! It's stinky.
373
00:14:09,120 --> 00:14:11,280
Oh, that'll scrape off a treat,
don't worry about that!
374
00:14:11,360 --> 00:14:13,560
You're shouting again, Dad! Huh?
375
00:14:13,640 --> 00:14:15,840
Oh... Stinky boat. Huh?
376
00:14:15,920 --> 00:14:17,880
Have you got the new pull
cord working?
377
00:14:17,960 --> 00:14:19,240
Huh?
378
00:14:19,320 --> 00:14:20,800
OK, forget it.
379
00:14:20,880 --> 00:14:22,200
What was that, Sam?
380
00:14:22,280 --> 00:14:26,080
Right, come on, Paul!
Let's do your ear.
381
00:14:26,160 --> 00:14:28,240
I can't hear you, Mum!
382
00:14:28,320 --> 00:14:29,680
OK, I'm off out.
383
00:14:29,760 --> 00:14:33,120
What? But my - my student friends
are coming over.
384
00:14:33,200 --> 00:14:35,080
Yeah, I know, that's why I'm going.
385
00:14:35,160 --> 00:14:38,200
No, but I need you here to,
come on, you know...
386
00:14:38,280 --> 00:14:40,280
Make you seem less old?
387
00:14:40,760 --> 00:14:42,200
I mean, pretty much.
388
00:14:42,280 --> 00:14:44,680
And - and I thought you might
enjoy it, as well,
389
00:14:44,760 --> 00:14:45,960
meeting people your own age.
390
00:14:46,040 --> 00:14:47,880
Who'll want to know
why I'm still living at home
391
00:14:47,960 --> 00:14:50,520
and doing nothing with my life.
Yeah, I wouldn't enjoy that, Mum.
392
00:14:50,600 --> 00:14:52,120
Well, I mean,
where are you even going?
393
00:14:52,200 --> 00:14:54,840
They're screening a Norwegian film
at the Everyman in Birmingham.
394
00:14:54,920 --> 00:14:57,520
Oh, my God, you have to stop being
so obsessed with Norway, please,
395
00:14:57,600 --> 00:14:59,280
this is not healthy.
396
00:14:59,360 --> 00:15:02,320
Says the person
about to drink a litre of vodka.
397
00:15:02,400 --> 00:15:05,080
I mean, that's just to break
the ice, ignore that.
398
00:15:05,160 --> 00:15:06,160
What's the film?
399
00:15:06,240 --> 00:15:07,760
Um, it's a documentary
about children
400
00:15:07,840 --> 00:15:10,440
suffering from seasonal affective
disorder in northern Norway.
401
00:15:10,520 --> 00:15:12,320
Great, well, that'll cheer you up.
402
00:15:12,400 --> 00:15:14,760
Hang on, Birmingham?
You're going to Birmingham?
403
00:15:14,840 --> 00:15:16,400
Yeah, so I need to leave now.
404
00:15:16,480 --> 00:15:18,040
Well, oh...
405
00:15:18,120 --> 00:15:20,120
How does that feel, Paul?
406
00:15:20,200 --> 00:15:21,720
Huh?
407
00:15:21,800 --> 00:15:23,600
Is it going in?
408
00:15:23,680 --> 00:15:25,960
I can't hear you, Mum,
there's oil in my ear!
409
00:15:26,040 --> 00:15:28,040
Ugh.
410
00:15:28,120 --> 00:15:30,760
Er, are you two planning
to be here all evening?
411
00:15:30,840 --> 00:15:31,840
Huh?
412
00:15:31,920 --> 00:15:34,520
I mean it's honestly like
an old people's home in here.
413
00:15:34,600 --> 00:15:36,720
Well, do your party
in the lounge, then!
414
00:15:36,800 --> 00:15:37,760
Well, no, I would,
415
00:15:37,840 --> 00:15:40,120
but there's a four horsepower
boat engine in there!
416
00:15:40,200 --> 00:15:41,960
Paul! Yes?!
417
00:15:42,040 --> 00:15:43,560
Er, a cup of tea please, babe!
418
00:15:43,640 --> 00:15:44,880
No, I didn't...
419
00:15:44,960 --> 00:15:47,200
Why have you got
a funnel in your ear?
420
00:15:47,280 --> 00:15:48,640
Huh?
421
00:15:48,720 --> 00:15:50,520
Oh, Mum was using it to pour olive
oil in -
422
00:15:50,600 --> 00:15:53,040
but it actually helps me
hear a bit better.
423
00:15:53,120 --> 00:15:54,080
Oh, my God.
424
00:15:54,160 --> 00:15:55,760
Oh, like an ear trumpet?
425
00:15:55,840 --> 00:15:57,720
DOORBELL RINGS
It's kind of like an ear trumpet!
426
00:15:57,800 --> 00:16:00,120
Aww... That's what I said.
427
00:16:00,200 --> 00:16:03,520
Huh? Oh, God, I mean, this is great,
this is exactly the image of my life
428
00:16:03,600 --> 00:16:05,280
I wanted to present
to my course mates.
429
00:16:05,360 --> 00:16:07,080
DOORBELL RINGS
The phone's ringing, Rach!
430
00:16:07,160 --> 00:16:09,120
No, that's the doorbell!
431
00:16:09,200 --> 00:16:12,080
Huh? Doorbell! Ah...
432
00:16:12,160 --> 00:16:13,320
OK.
433
00:16:13,400 --> 00:16:15,400
Oh, God.
434
00:16:17,280 --> 00:16:18,600
Hey! Hi.
435
00:16:18,680 --> 00:16:20,640
How's it goin'?
436
00:16:20,720 --> 00:16:23,320
I, er, come in! Thank you.
Thank you.
437
00:16:23,400 --> 00:16:24,360
Thank you.
438
00:16:24,440 --> 00:16:27,400
NERVOUS LAUGHTER
Um... Yeah.
439
00:16:29,600 --> 00:16:31,200
Is anyone else coming, or...?
440
00:16:31,280 --> 00:16:33,280
Um, I hope so!
441
00:16:34,880 --> 00:16:37,400
No, probably not, sorry.
442
00:16:37,480 --> 00:16:41,800
Er, people can be...people your age,
very cruel on WhatsApp, can't they?
443
00:16:41,880 --> 00:16:42,920
So... Hello.
444
00:16:43,000 --> 00:16:45,640
Yeah. No, ignore him, that's...
445
00:16:45,720 --> 00:16:48,640
Please don't film them, Sam,
they're our guests, sorry.
446
00:16:50,880 --> 00:16:52,560
I brought this.
447
00:16:52,640 --> 00:16:54,840
Great.
448
00:16:54,920 --> 00:16:56,920
That's so kind.
449
00:16:57,880 --> 00:16:59,120
Thank you.
450
00:16:59,200 --> 00:17:00,160
Come this way.
451
00:17:00,240 --> 00:17:05,280
Yeah, no, I was going to just
put on a tape. Um... Love tapes.
452
00:17:05,360 --> 00:17:07,080
Yeah... Hello, there!
453
00:17:07,160 --> 00:17:08,840
Do you like tapes? Hello?
454
00:17:08,920 --> 00:17:10,480
Hi! Huh?
455
00:17:10,560 --> 00:17:11,800
No, er, don't go in that room!
456
00:17:11,880 --> 00:17:13,920
Oh, er... No! Hi.
457
00:17:14,000 --> 00:17:15,560
I'm Sue.
458
00:17:15,640 --> 00:17:17,000
I'll get me trumpet.
459
00:17:17,080 --> 00:17:20,000
Oh, yes, God, yeah, this is Sue
and this is Paul,
460
00:17:20,080 --> 00:17:21,720
er, these are my course mates...
461
00:17:21,800 --> 00:17:24,000
I realise I actually
don't even know your names.
462
00:17:24,080 --> 00:17:25,560
Oh, er, er, Fara.
463
00:17:25,640 --> 00:17:26,960
And Xiaoming. Xiaoming.
464
00:17:27,040 --> 00:17:28,120
Huh?
465
00:17:28,200 --> 00:17:30,640
Lovely to meet you.
466
00:17:30,720 --> 00:17:32,720
Paul Jessop.
467
00:17:34,280 --> 00:17:36,280
Do you live with your parents?
468
00:17:37,520 --> 00:17:39,520
Er...
469
00:17:40,760 --> 00:17:44,760
Yeah. Yeah, I do.
470
00:17:44,840 --> 00:17:46,480
It is a bit of a drag,
471
00:17:46,560 --> 00:17:49,800
but it does save a lot of money,
so it's, you know...
472
00:17:49,880 --> 00:17:51,920
I'm a former Olympic archer!
473
00:17:52,000 --> 00:17:53,920
It's... God, yeah.
474
00:17:54,000 --> 00:17:55,440
Right.
475
00:17:55,520 --> 00:17:56,560
My Dad.
476
00:17:56,640 --> 00:17:58,520
You know, maybe we should...
477
00:17:58,600 --> 00:18:00,520
I-I feel like I want to...leave.
478
00:18:00,600 --> 00:18:01,720
No. No, no, no, no, no!
479
00:18:01,800 --> 00:18:03,760
Don't, don't be silly,
no, it's going to be great,
480
00:18:03,840 --> 00:18:04,800
just need to relax a bit
481
00:18:04,880 --> 00:18:06,680
and I actually planned
a drinking game for us.
482
00:18:06,760 --> 00:18:08,880
Oh, I don't really drink, but...
No, just a little one,
483
00:18:08,960 --> 00:18:10,800
just an ice breaker, you know,
484
00:18:10,880 --> 00:18:14,160
um, get some atmos going,
loosen you up a bit!
485
00:18:14,240 --> 00:18:15,640
Is that...? Do I need that?
486
00:18:15,720 --> 00:18:17,080
Loosen up all of us.
487
00:18:17,160 --> 00:18:20,720
So, it's the same rules as Play Your
Cards Right, so, very simple.
488
00:18:20,800 --> 00:18:23,160
What's that? What's...?
489
00:18:23,240 --> 00:18:24,840
Well, yeah, no, fair point,
490
00:18:24,920 --> 00:18:27,520
you're probably, um,
too young to know that.
491
00:18:27,600 --> 00:18:30,680
Well, it's, um -
it was a Bruce Forsyth show.
492
00:18:30,760 --> 00:18:32,160
Er, who?
493
00:18:32,240 --> 00:18:33,840
Brucie.
494
00:18:33,920 --> 00:18:35,000
Brucie, come on.
495
00:18:35,080 --> 00:18:38,760
I mean, you must've
seen Brucie growing up.
496
00:18:39,920 --> 00:18:42,160
I grew up in Chengdu.
497
00:18:42,240 --> 00:18:46,120
Even so, he was...he was this guy,
he used to do this.
498
00:18:47,560 --> 00:18:49,560
Why?
499
00:18:49,960 --> 00:18:54,080
I don't... I have no idea,
he just did that - that...
500
00:18:54,160 --> 00:18:56,400
The point is, that doesn't matter.
501
00:18:56,480 --> 00:19:00,520
I play a card and you have to say
if the next one is higher or lower
502
00:19:00,600 --> 00:19:03,000
and if you get it wrong you have
to drink half the glass
503
00:19:03,080 --> 00:19:05,920
and if you get a blackjack or an ace
you have to drink the whole glass
504
00:19:06,000 --> 00:19:07,920
and if it's a seven
it changes direction, got it?
505
00:19:08,000 --> 00:19:09,960
Er, I didn't understand
this thing about Brucie.
506
00:19:10,040 --> 00:19:11,400
Forget that, that's not relevant.
507
00:19:11,480 --> 00:19:13,160
Er, and I'm not sure
I really want to play.
508
00:19:13,240 --> 00:19:15,320
No, you will want to play
once you play,
509
00:19:15,400 --> 00:19:16,800
because it's going to be great, OK?
510
00:19:16,880 --> 00:19:18,880
Stars by Simply Red
And...turn a card.
511
00:19:19,880 --> 00:19:23,280
Eight, OK, so I'm going to go lower.
512
00:19:24,400 --> 00:19:27,200
Ah, it's ten, so that means
I've got to drink half of that.
513
00:19:30,520 --> 00:19:33,520
Gosh, that's...that is a lot
stronger than I thought.
514
00:19:33,600 --> 00:19:36,280
It's nice, um,
but it's got quite a kick.
515
00:19:39,400 --> 00:19:41,400
It's really strong.
516
00:19:42,640 --> 00:19:44,520
Good, but strong. Great.
517
00:19:44,600 --> 00:19:47,560
OK, so, your go, Xiaoming -
higher or lower?
518
00:19:47,640 --> 00:19:48,600
Lower.
519
00:19:48,680 --> 00:19:49,640
Lower.
520
00:19:49,720 --> 00:19:52,520
Seven! It is lower, and seven
means it goes back to me,
521
00:19:52,600 --> 00:19:54,960
so it's my turn again.
Er, I'm going to go...
522
00:19:55,040 --> 00:19:57,040
Yeah, I'm going to go lower
than a seven.
523
00:19:57,120 --> 00:19:58,320
Oh, my goodness,
524
00:19:58,400 --> 00:20:01,640
OK, so, it's a queen, which means
I'm going to drink the rest of it.
525
00:20:02,960 --> 00:20:05,640
I'm getting a bit of a head start,
aren't I?!
526
00:20:09,680 --> 00:20:11,280
Agh.
527
00:20:11,360 --> 00:20:13,600
So,
what's your name again?
528
00:20:13,680 --> 00:20:15,480
Er, Fara. Faro, Faro...
529
00:20:15,560 --> 00:20:18,160
Fara, are you going to go higher
or lower than a queen?
530
00:20:18,240 --> 00:20:19,200
Lower.
531
00:20:19,280 --> 00:20:21,120
Lower, that's a good guess.
532
00:20:21,200 --> 00:20:25,640
You're right, it's a good...
and, Xiaoming, higher or lower?
533
00:20:25,720 --> 00:20:26,760
Er, higher.
534
00:20:26,840 --> 00:20:28,640
Higher. I'd go higher.
535
00:20:28,720 --> 00:20:31,000
You are higher, it is higher.
536
00:20:31,080 --> 00:20:33,080
I'm going to go lower than a king.
537
00:20:34,120 --> 00:20:37,480
Oh come on, it's a blackjack!
538
00:20:37,560 --> 00:20:39,240
It's a blackjack!
539
00:20:39,320 --> 00:20:42,160
That means I'm going to have to
drink the whole thing, so...
540
00:20:44,680 --> 00:20:46,680
Uh-oh.
541
00:20:49,200 --> 00:20:51,240
Because that was punishment,
542
00:20:51,320 --> 00:20:53,640
it's my go again. I'm going to go...
543
00:20:55,120 --> 00:20:56,240
..lower.
544
00:20:56,320 --> 00:20:58,320
Oh...
545
00:20:59,480 --> 00:21:00,520
You all right?
546
00:21:00,600 --> 00:21:02,600
Sorry.
547
00:21:04,000 --> 00:21:05,640
It's all good.
548
00:21:05,720 --> 00:21:06,840
It's really nice.
549
00:21:06,920 --> 00:21:08,920
PAUL SNORES
550
00:21:11,640 --> 00:21:14,200
OK, I'm going to go
lower than an ace.
551
00:21:14,280 --> 00:21:15,240
Oh, God, thank God.
552
00:21:15,320 --> 00:21:16,520
Xiaoming?
553
00:21:16,600 --> 00:21:18,400
Higher. Higher? Higher?
554
00:21:18,480 --> 00:21:20,840
It is higher and it's a seven
so it's back to me.
555
00:21:20,920 --> 00:21:24,120
I'm going to go lower than a seven.
556
00:21:29,960 --> 00:21:31,960
OK...
557
00:21:32,560 --> 00:21:34,360
Cool.
558
00:21:34,440 --> 00:21:36,400
Is... Is she doing this on purpose?
559
00:21:36,480 --> 00:21:38,120
Yeah, Mum, probably don't
have that one.
560
00:21:38,200 --> 00:21:40,480
This is really fun,
isn't it really fun?
561
00:21:48,160 --> 00:21:50,360
Rach?
SHE GROANS
562
00:21:50,440 --> 00:21:52,440
Rach? Mm?
563
00:21:53,160 --> 00:21:55,760
I brought you some water,
Rachel, love.
564
00:21:57,840 --> 00:21:58,960
What happened?
565
00:21:59,040 --> 00:22:01,280
You fell asleep and were sick.
566
00:22:01,360 --> 00:22:03,360
Oh...
567
00:22:04,320 --> 00:22:06,320
Oh...
568
00:22:07,440 --> 00:22:09,200
Are they still here?
569
00:22:09,280 --> 00:22:11,440
No, they went a while ago.
570
00:22:11,520 --> 00:22:13,240
Mm.
571
00:22:13,320 --> 00:22:15,720
When you didn't come back
from the loo
572
00:22:15,800 --> 00:22:20,880
we ended up showing Xiaoming a load
of Bruce Forsyth videos on YouTube.
573
00:22:20,960 --> 00:22:22,680
Mm.
574
00:22:22,760 --> 00:22:25,720
Well, I guess I'll definitely be
the weird old student now.
575
00:22:25,800 --> 00:22:28,400
With good reason, to be fair.
Yeah.
576
00:22:28,480 --> 00:22:30,480
Right, come on, let's get you to
bed.
577
00:22:30,560 --> 00:22:33,000
Ooh, ooh, hang on.
Oh, oh, God, what's that?
578
00:22:33,080 --> 00:22:35,320
Oh...! No, what is it?
579
00:22:35,400 --> 00:22:37,600
That's my earwax!
Oh, oh, my God! Oh!
580
00:22:37,680 --> 00:22:39,800
Oh, my God! Oh, my God,
oh, my God, that's disgusting.
581
00:22:39,880 --> 00:22:41,880
Oh, my God. Wow! Oh, Sam,
get it off me, get it off me!
582
00:22:41,960 --> 00:22:43,400
I'm-I'm not touching it. Oh, God!
583
00:22:43,480 --> 00:22:44,760
I can hear everything.
584
00:22:44,840 --> 00:22:46,800
I'm like Superman. Oh! Urgh.
585
00:22:46,880 --> 00:22:49,000
Or - or normal man,
a policeman, anyway!
586
00:22:49,080 --> 00:22:51,240
I told you the olive oil would work,
didn't I?
587
00:22:51,320 --> 00:22:53,360
Yeah! Oh, Mum, thanks so much.
Oh, my God, oh, my God!
588
00:22:53,440 --> 00:22:54,840
I don't know what I'd do
without you.
589
00:22:54,920 --> 00:22:56,480
Oh, it's all smeared,
it's disgusting!
590
00:22:56,560 --> 00:22:57,560
Oh, come on, jeez Louise.
591
00:22:57,640 --> 00:22:58,800
And it's... Oh, my God.
592
00:22:58,880 --> 00:23:00,800
Overreacting much?
It's just human wax. Urgh.
593
00:23:00,880 --> 00:23:04,880
Now, make sure that your ear is dry
for at least a couple of days,
594
00:23:04,960 --> 00:23:08,120
because otherwise it will get all
blocked up again.
595
00:23:08,200 --> 00:23:10,120
Yeah, yeah.
What's all the shouting about?
596
00:23:10,200 --> 00:23:11,920
My earwax came out!
597
00:23:12,000 --> 00:23:13,320
And Mum was sick.
598
00:23:13,400 --> 00:23:14,640
{\an8}Amy, hi.
599
00:23:14,720 --> 00:23:15,760
{\an8}Hi. Hiya.
600
00:23:15,840 --> 00:23:17,880
{\an8}How was the Norwegian film?
601
00:23:17,960 --> 00:23:21,920
{\an8}No idea, the train to Birmingham
was cancelled so I missed it.
602
00:23:22,000 --> 00:23:23,720
This country's honestly shit.
603
00:23:23,800 --> 00:23:24,840
Whoa.
604
00:23:24,920 --> 00:23:27,000
No, it's - it's not, Amy. It's not.
605
00:23:27,080 --> 00:23:30,560
You know, Paul's fixed
the boat. Yeah. Haven't you, Paul?
606
00:23:30,640 --> 00:23:33,560
Yeah, she's all ship shape,
ready to try again tomorrow,
607
00:23:33,640 --> 00:23:35,240
so that'll be...
608
00:23:35,320 --> 00:23:37,600
..good, right? Good.
609
00:23:37,680 --> 00:23:39,400
Hey? Look at that!
610
00:23:39,480 --> 00:23:41,440
Oh, you smeared it in,
I wanted to keep that!
611
00:23:41,520 --> 00:23:42,960
What you doing, Sam?
612
00:23:43,040 --> 00:23:45,040
Just trying out that old camera.
613
00:23:55,640 --> 00:23:57,320
You OK? Yeah, no, I'm fine.
614
00:23:57,400 --> 00:23:58,480
Right, look out.
615
00:23:58,560 --> 00:24:00,600
Yeah, thanks, Cheryl, love.
All right, OK...
616
00:24:00,680 --> 00:24:02,960
Careful, Robin. OK, then.
Okey dokey.
617
00:24:03,040 --> 00:24:05,680
Excellent, OK, take two -
now that I've fitted a new pull cord
618
00:24:05,760 --> 00:24:07,360
it should be a lot looser
than yesterday,
619
00:24:07,440 --> 00:24:09,200
but please don't sit too close
to the tiller,
620
00:24:09,280 --> 00:24:11,080
I don't want to give anyone
another black eye.
621
00:24:11,160 --> 00:24:13,000
Well, I've got nothing left
to give, by the way!
622
00:24:13,080 --> 00:24:14,880
I'm so sorry about that again,
Robin. Ah...
623
00:24:14,960 --> 00:24:17,400
No, don't be, his face definitely
looks way more even now.
624
00:24:17,480 --> 00:24:19,560
It does, it does.
Please can we stop it from rocking?
625
00:24:19,640 --> 00:24:21,720
Yeah, we do need to sort out
the weight distribution.
626
00:24:21,800 --> 00:24:23,800
Cherry, if you move... You what?
627
00:24:23,880 --> 00:24:25,600
What are you trying to say?
628
00:24:25,680 --> 00:24:27,040
No, I didn't...
629
00:24:27,120 --> 00:24:28,840
OK, Mum, if you could...
630
00:24:28,920 --> 00:24:30,640
What?! I've been on a diet,
thank you!
631
00:24:30,720 --> 00:24:33,680
No, it's not like - it's not about
that, it could be anyone, oh, my God!
632
00:24:33,760 --> 00:24:35,920
I'll get off, I don't like boats
anyway. Thank you, Sam.
633
00:24:36,000 --> 00:24:37,320
OK, cheers, go on, off you go.
Bye.
634
00:24:37,400 --> 00:24:39,960
All right, but don't - soft step,
Sam, all right don't clomp, Sam!
635
00:24:40,040 --> 00:24:42,160
Oh, Sam! Don't rock it, Sam.
You're not helping, mate.
636
00:24:42,240 --> 00:24:44,520
Look, Chez,
you come over here with me, look.
637
00:24:44,600 --> 00:24:46,560
Amy, get over there next to Sue. OK?
638
00:24:46,640 --> 00:24:49,000
All right, it will level out once
we get some knots up, OK?
639
00:24:49,080 --> 00:24:51,600
OK. Oh, God, please can we just
keep it level? All right, OK.
640
00:24:51,680 --> 00:24:54,040
Are you a bit hungover then, Rachel?
641
00:24:54,120 --> 00:24:56,080
No, no, actually,
I'm just a bit seasick.
642
00:24:56,160 --> 00:24:57,240
Right, yeah.
643
00:24:57,320 --> 00:24:59,720
Warp speed, Mr Paulo. Yep, one sec.
644
00:24:59,800 --> 00:25:03,880
I bet this reminds you
of the fjords, doesn't it?
645
00:25:03,960 --> 00:25:05,600
No.
646
00:25:05,680 --> 00:25:07,600
OK, here we go! Come on!
647
00:25:07,680 --> 00:25:10,400
Right, ready? Three, two, one!
648
00:25:10,480 --> 00:25:11,520
Oh!
649
00:25:11,600 --> 00:25:16,240
Oh, my God, not again!
No! mate, you all right?
650
00:25:16,320 --> 00:25:19,000
Not again! Robin, sit down!
651
00:25:19,080 --> 00:25:21,680
Sit down, please!
Stop rocking the boat! Robin!
652
00:25:21,760 --> 00:25:23,080
SHE VOMITS
653
00:25:23,160 --> 00:25:25,120
Eurgh, Rach, stop vomming!
654
00:25:25,200 --> 00:25:26,760
Stop vomming, Rach!
655
00:25:26,840 --> 00:25:28,200
Oh, that's...
656
00:25:28,280 --> 00:25:30,400
SHE LAUGHS, PAUL MOANS
657
00:25:31,720 --> 00:25:33,880
That's so gross.
658
00:25:35,120 --> 00:25:37,120
Argh, get out of there!
659
00:25:37,760 --> 00:25:39,760
I did say we should chuck it.
660
00:25:40,160 --> 00:25:42,280
Definitely. Get it in the skip.
661
00:25:44,360 --> 00:25:47,360
I'll use my bod.
Here, Mum. Oh...
662
00:25:47,440 --> 00:25:49,120
Oh, thank you.
663
00:25:49,200 --> 00:25:51,200
Ooh...
664
00:25:51,840 --> 00:25:53,840
What are you smiling about?
665
00:25:53,920 --> 00:25:57,160
Just...I'm quite happy
to be home, actually.
666
00:26:00,000 --> 00:26:02,000
Mm.
667
00:26:02,640 --> 00:26:05,200
Eurgh, you stink of vomit, Mum.
668
00:26:05,280 --> 00:26:06,800
Here you go, love.
669
00:26:06,880 --> 00:26:08,880
Thanks, Mum.
670
00:26:09,280 --> 00:26:11,320
Mm, you're the best.
671
00:26:12,800 --> 00:26:14,800
You know...
672
00:26:15,240 --> 00:26:19,160
..if you wanted to,
you'd be welcome to move in with us
673
00:26:19,240 --> 00:26:21,360
while you're looking for
somewhere else.
674
00:26:22,440 --> 00:26:24,120
Really? Yeah.
675
00:26:24,200 --> 00:26:26,640
Let's do something nice
for you for a change.
676
00:26:26,720 --> 00:26:28,760
Oh...
Watch out for the buoy, Rach. Rach!
677
00:26:28,840 --> 00:26:31,000
Aah, oh! Oh, Mum!
678
00:26:31,080 --> 00:26:33,080
You all right?
Come on, come on get up.
679
00:26:34,520 --> 00:26:35,960
Would that be all right with Rachel?
680
00:26:36,040 --> 00:26:38,000
Yeah, definitely.
681
00:26:38,080 --> 00:26:39,240
Probably.
682
00:26:39,320 --> 00:26:43,120
But, er, we'd love you to move in
with us, Mum, of course we would.
683
00:26:46,800 --> 00:26:48,360
Oh, agh...
684
00:26:48,440 --> 00:26:49,440
What is it?
685
00:26:49,520 --> 00:26:52,560
Oh... I think the water's
blocked my ear again. Aww.
686
00:26:52,640 --> 00:26:54,880
Oh, no way,
Granny kept the gnome of Dad!
687
00:26:54,960 --> 00:26:55,920
Really?
688
00:26:56,000 --> 00:26:59,040
It's not "of" me. Mum, I thought you
said you were going to bin that?
689
00:26:59,120 --> 00:27:01,000
Well, Amy said she wanted it.
690
00:27:01,080 --> 00:27:02,560
Exactly, it's mine.
691
00:27:02,640 --> 00:27:04,320
Thanks, Granny. No Amy, Amy!
692
00:27:04,400 --> 00:27:05,520
That's going in the skip!
693
00:27:05,600 --> 00:27:06,960
No! Amy! No!
694
00:27:07,040 --> 00:27:08,160
Amy, please!
695
00:27:08,240 --> 00:27:11,480
It's mine! No!
Go on! Amy! Sam! Seize her!
696
00:27:11,560 --> 00:27:13,040
It's mine! Sam!
697
00:27:13,120 --> 00:27:15,600
# I
698
00:27:15,680 --> 00:27:19,480
# Wanna fall from the stars
699
00:27:19,560 --> 00:27:25,040
# Straight into your arms, I
700
00:27:25,120 --> 00:27:28,880
# I feel you
701
00:27:28,960 --> 00:27:34,560
# I hope you comprehend, I
702
00:27:34,640 --> 00:27:38,320
# Wanna fall from the stars
703
00:27:38,400 --> 00:27:43,960
# Straight into your arms, I
704
00:27:45,160 --> 00:27:47,880
# I feel you
705
00:27:47,960 --> 00:27:53,160
# I hope you comprehend, I
706
00:27:53,240 --> 00:27:56,520
# Wanna fall from the stars... #
53560
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