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1
00:00:13,322 --> 00:00:16,881
Ladies and gentlemen,
welcome to Mrs Brown's Boys.
2
00:00:16,882 --> 00:00:19,761
# She's Mrs Brown
Agnes
3
00:00:19,762 --> 00:00:22,761
# That's Mrs Brown
Agnes
4
00:00:22,762 --> 00:00:24,402
# Oh, Mrs Brown. #
5
00:00:29,221 --> 00:00:32,461
Sharon has the day off.
Just sitting over there.
6
00:00:32,462 --> 00:00:33,820
Says she's bored.
7
00:00:33,821 --> 00:00:36,859
Huh! In my day we didn't
know what the word bored meant.
8
00:00:36,860 --> 00:00:38,661
Couldn't afford a dictionary?
9
00:00:48,861 --> 00:00:50,301
Where did you get that?
10
00:00:50,302 --> 00:00:51,620
Sharon got it.
11
00:00:51,621 --> 00:00:55,461
I'm doing me hall up and I thought
I might find nice colours in there.
12
00:00:57,861 --> 00:01:00,255
The only colour you'll
find in there is blue.
13
00:01:00,720 --> 00:01:02,001
That's all about sex.
14
00:01:03,681 --> 00:01:06,680
Agnes, do you ever think about sex?
15
00:01:06,681 --> 00:01:09,640
No, I'm way past that, Winnie.
16
00:01:09,641 --> 00:01:13,201
My legs have been together now
longer than the Rolling Stones.
17
00:01:14,241 --> 00:01:16,081
Yeah, with the big lips.
18
00:01:21,321 --> 00:01:24,561
Agnes, what if the Hokey Cokey
is what it's all about?
19
00:01:29,161 --> 00:01:31,681
Do you know, Winnie,
everybody needs a friend like you.
20
00:01:31,682 --> 00:01:35,760
Ah, Agnes. We'll be friends
until we're old and senile.
21
00:01:35,761 --> 00:01:39,201
That's right, Winnie.
Then every day we'll be new friends.
22
00:01:43,801 --> 00:01:47,480
Ah, hello, Mrs McGoogan.
Oh, I like the book.
23
00:01:47,481 --> 00:01:50,279
I believe that's a real,
"Get up there, Nelly," book?
24
00:01:50,280 --> 00:01:52,961
I'd better get over
and say, "Get up there, Sharon."
25
00:01:52,962 --> 00:01:54,160
See you, Agnes.
26
00:01:54,161 --> 00:01:56,040
See you, Winnie.
27
00:01:56,041 --> 00:01:58,319
So what do you want?
Dermot told me to meet him here.
28
00:01:58,320 --> 00:02:00,801
He said he might have some work
for me. What's in the box?
29
00:02:00,802 --> 00:02:04,161
It wouldn't be my
new kitchen, would it?
30
00:02:05,681 --> 00:02:06,721
No.
31
00:02:09,761 --> 00:02:13,001
It's a new phone.
Dermot's looking for a smartphone.
32
00:02:13,002 --> 00:02:14,280
Top of the range.
33
00:02:14,281 --> 00:02:16,439
Why have you got
the black tape on the sides of it?
34
00:02:16,440 --> 00:02:19,001
Oh, I have to cover up the name.
It's BBC rules.
35
00:02:21,321 --> 00:02:24,561
But it's very obvious from the box
that it's an iPhone 4S.
36
00:02:28,601 --> 00:02:32,241
Buster, are you trying to unload
stolen goods on my son?
37
00:02:32,242 --> 00:02:33,560
Would I do that?
38
00:02:33,561 --> 00:02:36,600
Yes. Mrs Brown, that's very hurtful.
39
00:02:36,601 --> 00:02:39,360
I have feelings, I'm not a rock.
40
00:02:39,361 --> 00:02:41,241
You're not even a feckin' pebble.
41
00:02:43,001 --> 00:02:44,881
Buster, did you ever have a job?
42
00:02:44,882 --> 00:02:47,840
I mean a real job, a REAL job?
43
00:02:47,841 --> 00:02:49,441
Yeah, I was store security.
44
00:02:51,681 --> 00:02:55,881
You know, looking out for shoplifters
down at McCullagh Pickets.
45
00:02:55,882 --> 00:02:58,040
Who sell grand pianos.
46
00:02:58,041 --> 00:02:59,481
I know, it was a handy job.
47
00:03:00,681 --> 00:03:01,759
Why did you leave?
48
00:03:01,760 --> 00:03:03,999
I couldn't work for that man
after what he said to me.
49
00:03:04,000 --> 00:03:05,481
Why, son, what did he say to you?
50
00:03:05,482 --> 00:03:06,721
You're fired.
51
00:03:12,481 --> 00:03:15,320
I could smell you
before I'd seen you.
52
00:03:15,321 --> 00:03:17,879
That's the first time
I've heard that today.
53
00:03:17,880 --> 00:03:19,879
Here, the one you were looking for.
54
00:03:19,880 --> 00:03:22,161
Just put your SIM card in there
and it's ready to go.
55
00:03:22,162 --> 00:03:24,240
Brilliant. Thanks, Buster.
56
00:03:24,241 --> 00:03:25,959
Dermot, is that above board?
57
00:03:25,960 --> 00:03:27,519
Mammy, will you stop worrying?
58
00:03:27,520 --> 00:03:30,081
With that fecker involved,
I'd always worry.
59
00:03:31,681 --> 00:03:33,721
So, Buster,
do you fancy doing a bit of work?
60
00:03:33,722 --> 00:03:35,040
Yeah, sure, when?
61
00:03:35,041 --> 00:03:37,599
Now, let's get down to the office,
get kitted out.
62
00:03:37,600 --> 00:03:40,641
If I'm an air freshener,
I want to be vanilla.
63
00:03:40,642 --> 00:03:43,080
Shut up, Buster. See you, Ma.
64
00:03:43,081 --> 00:03:44,121
Good luck.
65
00:03:45,961 --> 00:03:47,360
Hello there.
66
00:03:47,361 --> 00:03:52,160
Well, as you can see,
I'm still waiting on my new kitchen.
67
00:03:52,161 --> 00:03:55,599
I don't know what's wrong with me
today? I feel uneasy.
68
00:03:55,600 --> 00:03:56,999
Do you know that feeling you get
69
00:03:57,000 --> 00:03:59,761
when you just know something is
going to happen?
70
00:04:01,041 --> 00:04:04,121
Rory and Dino have moved in together
into a new apartment.
71
00:04:04,122 --> 00:04:06,841
Oh, they seem blissfully happy.
72
00:04:11,641 --> 00:04:13,521
Though I could be fuckin' wrong.
73
00:04:15,121 --> 00:04:17,601
Rory, what's wrong? Sit down.
74
00:04:19,961 --> 00:04:22,600
What happened, did you break a nail?
75
00:04:22,601 --> 00:04:27,080
Come on, Rory, don't be getting
upset. Tell us what's wrong?
76
00:04:27,081 --> 00:04:28,920
Is it you and Dino?
77
00:04:28,921 --> 00:04:31,921
What happened?
Did he cut your fuckin' tongue out?
78
00:04:32,961 --> 00:04:34,520
Mammy!
79
00:04:34,521 --> 00:04:38,481
Well, what's the point in educating
a child if he speaks to you with...
80
00:04:38,482 --> 00:04:40,121
Speak!
81
00:04:42,681 --> 00:04:45,599
Mammy, can I stay
here for a couple of days?
82
00:04:45,600 --> 00:04:49,601
My apartment is ruined.
I'll have to get new carpets and all.
83
00:04:49,602 --> 00:04:51,480
Why, love, what happened?
84
00:04:51,481 --> 00:04:53,480
Me and Dino had a row.
85
00:04:53,481 --> 00:04:54,920
Oh, for God's sake.
86
00:04:54,921 --> 00:04:57,321
I walked out
and when I came back he was gone
87
00:04:57,322 --> 00:04:59,640
and he'd destroyed the apartment.
88
00:04:59,641 --> 00:05:01,080
Destroyed it?
89
00:05:01,081 --> 00:05:03,721
He even pulled
the radiator off the wall.
90
00:05:03,722 --> 00:05:05,720
The whole place was flooded.
91
00:05:05,721 --> 00:05:08,201
Mark is over there now
trying to fix it.
92
00:05:08,202 --> 00:05:10,320
But I have to get new carpets.
93
00:05:10,321 --> 00:05:11,439
Well, a row is one thing
94
00:05:11,440 --> 00:05:14,439
but there's no need for
that kind of violence.
95
00:05:14,440 --> 00:05:16,919
Rory, love,
of course you can stay here.
96
00:05:16,920 --> 00:05:18,921
You go up
and have a nice hot bath, love,
97
00:05:18,922 --> 00:05:22,640
put some Fairy liquid in it,
make it nice and bubbly.
98
00:05:22,641 --> 00:05:24,281
I'll make you a cup of tea, love.
99
00:05:24,282 --> 00:05:26,281
Thanks, Mammy. All right.
100
00:05:27,361 --> 00:05:29,081
What the hell is Dino playing at?
101
00:05:29,082 --> 00:05:31,840
I don't know? Poor Rory.
102
00:05:31,841 --> 00:05:34,441
And when I see him,
poor fuckin' Dino!
103
00:05:37,881 --> 00:05:42,121
OK, Mr Campbell, I'll tell her
when she comes in. Bye.
104
00:05:44,281 --> 00:05:45,800
Hi, you two.
105
00:05:45,801 --> 00:05:48,519
Hiya, Cathy. Is your mother
home from the market yet?
106
00:05:48,520 --> 00:05:51,481
Not yet, any minute though.
We'll call back later, so...
107
00:05:51,482 --> 00:05:56,160
No, Mark, we're waiting. Putting
it off won't make it any easier.
108
00:05:56,161 --> 00:05:58,720
This came in this morning.
109
00:05:58,721 --> 00:06:00,999
We've been granted our visas
for Australia.
110
00:06:01,000 --> 00:06:03,521
Oh, that's fantastic!
Congratulations!
111
00:06:03,522 --> 00:06:06,240
Yeah, great. Right, we'll go then.
112
00:06:06,241 --> 00:06:07,961
Cathy, will you tell Mammy, so?
113
00:06:09,681 --> 00:06:11,641
Stop it, Mark, we're waiting.
114
00:06:13,041 --> 00:06:16,640
Hello, you two.
What brings you here so early?
115
00:06:16,641 --> 00:06:19,241
Mark, why don't you go
in the sitting room with your mother
116
00:06:19,242 --> 00:06:21,800
for a private chat? Come on, Ma.
117
00:06:21,801 --> 00:06:24,001
It's not my book,
I just got a lend of it.
118
00:06:27,441 --> 00:06:31,040
Oh, God,
she's been dreading this day.
119
00:06:31,041 --> 00:06:33,679
I know. Cathy,
can you do me a favour?
120
00:06:33,680 --> 00:06:36,361
If I can.
Do you have a printer at work?
121
00:06:36,362 --> 00:06:38,040
Yeah, sure.
122
00:06:38,041 --> 00:06:40,439
What is it, Mark?
Is it something about Bono?
123
00:06:40,440 --> 00:06:41,479
No, Ma, Bono's fine.
124
00:06:41,480 --> 00:06:43,921
Thank God, I thought you were
going to give me bad news...
125
00:06:43,922 --> 00:06:47,680
Mammy, I got my visa for Australia.
We all did.
126
00:06:47,681 --> 00:06:49,521
Myself, Betty and Bono.
127
00:06:50,521 --> 00:06:52,521
We can go within the next six weeks.
128
00:06:54,121 --> 00:06:55,760
Wonderful.
129
00:06:55,761 --> 00:06:57,440
Congratulations.
130
00:06:57,441 --> 00:06:59,840
A new life, a new beginning.
131
00:06:59,841 --> 00:07:01,800
It's fantastic.
132
00:07:01,801 --> 00:07:03,800
Cathy, did they tell you?
133
00:07:03,801 --> 00:07:06,001
They got them,
the visas for Australia.
134
00:07:06,002 --> 00:07:09,520
They got them. Congratulations.
135
00:07:09,521 --> 00:07:11,719
Jesus, Ma, I thought you'd be upset.
136
00:07:11,720 --> 00:07:14,359
Well, I'm not going to say I'd
be thrilled to see you going
137
00:07:14,360 --> 00:07:17,599
but you have to do whatever's
right for your family.
138
00:07:17,600 --> 00:07:20,079
I'm delighted for yous,
both of yous.
139
00:07:20,080 --> 00:07:23,121
Especially you, Betty,
cos I know it was all your idea.
140
00:07:24,601 --> 00:07:27,319
We should be going.
Thanks for doing that, Cathy.
141
00:07:27,320 --> 00:07:29,239
No problem, Betty, I'll get it done.
142
00:07:29,240 --> 00:07:31,001
I suppose you'll want to
start packing?
143
00:07:31,002 --> 00:07:32,480
I've already started.
144
00:07:32,481 --> 00:07:34,440
Of course you have.
145
00:07:34,441 --> 00:07:36,361
Mammy,
there was a phone call for you.
146
00:07:36,362 --> 00:07:39,880
A Mr Campbell,
Kirby & Campbell Solicitors.
147
00:07:39,881 --> 00:07:42,879
Oh, all right.
Solicitors? What's that about?
148
00:07:42,880 --> 00:07:44,201
Nothing. Nothing important.
149
00:07:44,202 --> 00:07:45,721
I'll get that!
150
00:07:48,441 --> 00:07:51,000
Hello? How do you do?
151
00:07:51,001 --> 00:07:53,521
Hello, Mr Campbell. Yes, I...
152
00:07:55,361 --> 00:07:57,081
Just one moment, please.
153
00:08:08,001 --> 00:08:09,281
Uh-oh.
154
00:08:19,401 --> 00:08:21,640
I'll get that.
155
00:08:21,641 --> 00:08:24,121
Cathy, answer that
glistening love rod.
156
00:08:27,161 --> 00:08:31,001
Hello? Yes, this is Cathy Brown.
157
00:08:32,241 --> 00:08:34,720
Oh, thanks for calling me back.
158
00:08:34,721 --> 00:08:38,041
I was looking for some information
on a solicitors company,
159
00:08:38,042 --> 00:08:39,201
Kirby & Campbell?
160
00:08:41,161 --> 00:08:43,401
I was wondering what it is
they specialise in?
161
00:08:44,841 --> 00:08:45,881
Door, Mammy.
162
00:09:02,841 --> 00:09:06,841
Well, if it isn't the bally
bunion butcher! Come in.
163
00:09:11,641 --> 00:09:13,481
You have a cheek calling over here.
164
00:09:13,482 --> 00:09:14,600
Is Rory here?
165
00:09:14,601 --> 00:09:17,039
He's upstairs but I don't think
he wants to speak to you.
166
00:09:17,040 --> 00:09:18,719
I just want to apologise.
167
00:09:18,720 --> 00:09:21,121
I don't think an apology
will cut it this time, Dino.
168
00:09:21,122 --> 00:09:22,161
Oh!
169
00:09:24,961 --> 00:09:26,601
How could you be so rough?
170
00:09:26,602 --> 00:09:27,641
Oh!
171
00:09:30,401 --> 00:09:31,961
My Rory is such a gentle soul.
172
00:09:31,962 --> 00:09:33,001
Oh!
173
00:09:35,161 --> 00:09:37,081
There's no need for that vandalism.
174
00:09:37,082 --> 00:09:38,800
Vandalism? Vandalism!
175
00:09:38,801 --> 00:09:41,799
Vandalism? Vandalism!
I did nothing like that!
176
00:09:41,800 --> 00:09:44,679
Liar! You pulled the radiator
off the wall,
177
00:09:44,680 --> 00:09:46,641
you flooded the whole
feckin' apartment!
178
00:09:46,642 --> 00:09:48,720
I had to! You had to?
179
00:09:48,721 --> 00:09:50,801
Aye, he had me handcuffed to it.
180
00:09:59,921 --> 00:10:01,321
What the hell happened?
181
00:10:02,601 --> 00:10:04,001
I think I've killed her.
182
00:10:05,561 --> 00:10:07,801
She's fine. Oh, no!
183
00:10:14,641 --> 00:10:16,360
What's wrong, Cathy?
184
00:10:16,361 --> 00:10:17,480
Mammy fainted.
185
00:10:17,481 --> 00:10:21,041
No, Cathy, no, you look pale.
Mammy's fainted before.
186
00:10:23,721 --> 00:10:26,199
I just found out about
the solicitors
187
00:10:26,200 --> 00:10:27,521
who have been calling Mammy.
188
00:10:27,522 --> 00:10:30,721
What about them?
They specialise in adoptions.
189
00:10:35,121 --> 00:10:37,201
Dermot, she's awake.
190
00:10:41,041 --> 00:10:42,441
Are you all right, Mammy?
191
00:10:49,441 --> 00:10:52,039
Adoptions? These solicitors
Kirby & Campbell,
192
00:10:52,040 --> 00:10:53,479
they arrange adoptions?
193
00:10:53,480 --> 00:10:55,599
No, they track down adopted
children
194
00:10:55,600 --> 00:10:57,999
from mothers who put them
up for adoption years ago.
195
00:10:58,000 --> 00:10:59,119
What does that mean?
196
00:10:59,120 --> 00:11:01,359
That means that one of us
could be adopted.
197
00:11:01,360 --> 00:11:04,001
Surely your mother would have
told you? Wouldn't she?
198
00:11:04,002 --> 00:11:06,080
No!
199
00:11:06,081 --> 00:11:07,960
So which one of yous then?
200
00:11:07,961 --> 00:11:11,521
I suppose whichever one of us
is the most different to the rest?
201
00:11:13,001 --> 00:11:14,041
Hiya.
202
00:11:16,681 --> 00:11:18,680
What?
203
00:11:18,681 --> 00:11:21,959
Come on, Betty, we'd better get
out of here before Mammy comes back.
204
00:11:21,960 --> 00:11:24,121
She'll know
we were talking about her.
205
00:11:24,122 --> 00:11:26,280
Yeah, us too.
206
00:11:26,281 --> 00:11:29,000
Come on, Dermot Brown or
207
00:11:29,001 --> 00:11:30,800
whoever you really are.
208
00:11:30,801 --> 00:11:34,000
Maria, that's not
even a little bit funny.
209
00:11:34,001 --> 00:11:35,359
What's going on, Dermot?
210
00:11:35,360 --> 00:11:36,601
Cathy'll fill you in.
211
00:11:37,881 --> 00:11:39,681
For God's sake, Cathy, what is it?
212
00:11:39,682 --> 00:11:42,000
We think one of us is adopted.
213
00:11:42,001 --> 00:11:46,480
I knew it!
I was born into a real rich family.
214
00:11:46,481 --> 00:11:48,921
And yous bastards kidnapped me!
215
00:11:51,001 --> 00:11:54,480
For God's sake, Rory!
216
00:11:54,481 --> 00:11:56,321
Does everything have to be a drama?
217
00:12:01,881 --> 00:12:03,001
Hello, Cathy.
218
00:12:19,281 --> 00:12:23,841
So you see, Cathy, I wasn't a married
man just using you for a fling.
219
00:12:24,841 --> 00:12:26,999
I've been divorced a long time ago.
220
00:12:27,000 --> 00:12:29,041
But why didn't you just say that?
221
00:12:30,841 --> 00:12:34,361
I wanted to, but neither you
nor your mother gave me a chance.
222
00:12:34,362 --> 00:12:38,160
Dermot's phone.
I bet that's feckin' stolen.
223
00:12:38,161 --> 00:12:40,680
Mammy, look who's here.
224
00:12:40,681 --> 00:12:41,961
Detective Mick.
225
00:12:44,401 --> 00:12:46,001
Lets go in and say hello.
226
00:12:47,521 --> 00:12:48,761
I'll get it.
227
00:12:53,241 --> 00:12:54,760
Hello, Mrs Brown.
228
00:12:54,761 --> 00:12:55,919
I hope you have a warrant.
229
00:12:55,920 --> 00:12:58,759
You can't just walk in here
looking for stolen phones.
230
00:12:58,760 --> 00:13:01,639
No, no, I'm not here on
official business.
231
00:13:01,640 --> 00:13:04,239
Stolen phones? What?
You said stolen phones.
232
00:13:04,240 --> 00:13:06,639
Who did? You did, just now.
You said stolen phones.
233
00:13:06,640 --> 00:13:09,761
What? Mammy, Father Quinn is back.
Isn't that fantastic?
234
00:13:09,762 --> 00:13:12,960
Oh, fantastic! Hello, Father Quinn.
235
00:13:12,961 --> 00:13:14,201
Come in! Come in!
236
00:13:15,841 --> 00:13:19,641
Let's go for a drink, Mick.
I want to hear the whole story.
237
00:13:26,681 --> 00:13:29,201
Now, Father, welcome back.
238
00:13:30,201 --> 00:13:32,481
How did reha... your holiday go?
239
00:13:34,601 --> 00:13:37,399
Sufficient to say that
I had a good rest, Mrs Brown.
240
00:13:37,400 --> 00:13:39,961
That's fantastic. Do you want
me to pour you a drop? No!
241
00:13:39,962 --> 00:13:43,160
I mean, no thank you, Mrs Brown.
242
00:13:43,161 --> 00:13:45,199
It's just great to have him back,
Mrs Brown.
243
00:13:45,200 --> 00:13:47,121
The hospital say it was
all caused by...
244
00:13:47,122 --> 00:13:48,800
You!
245
00:13:48,801 --> 00:13:50,959
Stress, Father. They said stress.
246
00:13:50,960 --> 00:13:53,681
Ah. Well, the drink
couldn't have helped!
247
00:13:56,041 --> 00:13:57,880
I'm attending meetings now
248
00:13:57,881 --> 00:14:02,720
and one of the recommendations
is that I am to confront my demons.
249
00:14:02,721 --> 00:14:05,401
So, I'm here.
250
00:14:10,761 --> 00:14:12,641
Well, what can I do for you, Father?
251
00:14:12,642 --> 00:14:15,320
Oh, yes. Well... Allow me, Father.
252
00:14:15,321 --> 00:14:19,239
Mrs Brown, as you may know
Father Quinn's annual garden party
253
00:14:19,240 --> 00:14:20,481
is coming up shortly.
254
00:14:21,601 --> 00:14:22,921
Where's me phone?
255
00:14:24,121 --> 00:14:26,761
Do you want me to ring it?
Yeah, will you?
256
00:14:29,641 --> 00:14:33,041
The garden party is a major
fundraiser for meals on wheels.
257
00:14:39,361 --> 00:14:42,841
But it will also be my first event
since I came back.
258
00:14:44,761 --> 00:14:46,239
And the Father's counsellor
259
00:14:46,240 --> 00:14:48,439
suggested that he invite you
along to help.
260
00:14:48,440 --> 00:14:50,721
Sort of a re-baptism of fire
so to speak.
261
00:14:53,281 --> 00:14:55,001
Hot! Hot fire!
262
00:14:56,001 --> 00:14:59,761
And indeed it is a very important
gathering for the entire community.
263
00:15:02,441 --> 00:15:06,161
It gives friends and neighbours
a chance to keep in touch.
264
00:15:07,601 --> 00:15:09,961
Touch! Touch! Oh, touch!
265
00:15:15,321 --> 00:15:17,641
It was ringing.
Maybe you left it in the car.
266
00:15:17,642 --> 00:15:20,201
No, I walked here! Ring it again.
267
00:15:22,641 --> 00:15:26,761
Look, Father, I know how important
Father Quinn's garden party is...
268
00:15:29,401 --> 00:15:30,839
I'll get to the point.
269
00:15:30,840 --> 00:15:32,519
I need volunteers on the day
270
00:15:32,520 --> 00:15:35,361
to help me give the parishioners
a great day out.
271
00:15:35,362 --> 00:15:39,281
Now, I would never usually ask you...
272
00:15:40,921 --> 00:15:43,880
Mrs Brown, will you come along
and help?
273
00:15:43,881 --> 00:15:46,241
Come along! Come along!
274
00:15:47,761 --> 00:15:49,999
This was a mistake,
give me that bottle.
275
00:15:50,000 --> 00:15:52,759
No, Father, you mustn't!
Just wait, Father.
276
00:15:52,760 --> 00:15:54,121
Mrs Brown, will you be coming?
277
00:15:59,241 --> 00:16:04,081
Yes! Yes! Yes!
278
00:16:05,921 --> 00:16:07,241
Yes!
279
00:16:20,201 --> 00:16:22,000
You look in good form.
280
00:16:22,001 --> 00:16:23,041
I am.
281
00:16:24,321 --> 00:16:26,759
It's been a strange day.
Oh, me too.
282
00:16:26,760 --> 00:16:29,199
I had Father Quinn
and Father Damien call
283
00:16:29,200 --> 00:16:32,319
asking me to volunteer to
help at the garden party.
284
00:16:32,320 --> 00:16:33,961
They can feck off, Agnes!
285
00:16:33,962 --> 00:16:36,680
Eight hours on my feet in the cold.
286
00:16:36,681 --> 00:16:39,720
They asked me too. I volunteered.
287
00:16:39,721 --> 00:16:42,801
What? Ah, they
must have seen you coming.
288
00:16:50,321 --> 00:16:52,720
It's only one day.
289
00:16:52,721 --> 00:16:54,081
Somebody has to do it.
290
00:16:54,082 --> 00:16:55,840
Well, I suppose.
291
00:16:55,841 --> 00:16:59,281
Here, I see Mick the Dick is
back on the scene.
292
00:17:00,761 --> 00:17:02,481
He dropped in out of the blue.
293
00:17:02,482 --> 00:17:07,520
Cathy said he explained everything
and now, oh, he's so sensitive!
294
00:17:07,521 --> 00:17:10,321
Aren't they all.
Especially around the top.
295
00:17:15,161 --> 00:17:16,801
Emotionally.
296
00:17:19,401 --> 00:17:21,401
My Redser had only two emotions.
297
00:17:21,402 --> 00:17:22,601
Horny and hungry.
298
00:17:24,241 --> 00:17:27,201
Every time he got an erection
I made him a sandwich.
299
00:17:28,961 --> 00:17:30,600
Here, same again, pet?
300
00:17:30,601 --> 00:17:31,641
Yes, love.
301
00:17:34,561 --> 00:17:37,641
You know, Rory, I'm so
sorry we even had that fight.
302
00:17:37,642 --> 00:17:39,000
I am too.
303
00:17:39,001 --> 00:17:42,799
I woke up and you weren't beside me
and I didn't like it.
304
00:17:42,800 --> 00:17:45,159
Well, I'll be there tomorrow,
so don't you worry.
305
00:17:45,160 --> 00:17:48,721
I'd much prefer it if you were
legally obliged to be there.
306
00:17:51,521 --> 00:17:54,521
Dino Doyle, are you proposing to me?
307
00:17:59,401 --> 00:18:00,640
Hiya, Ma.
308
00:18:00,641 --> 00:18:02,240
Hello, son.
309
00:18:02,241 --> 00:18:03,561
Ma, can I ask you something?
310
00:18:03,562 --> 00:18:04,920
Sure.
311
00:18:04,921 --> 00:18:06,360
Do I look like Daddy?
312
00:18:06,361 --> 00:18:07,481
Jesus, no, not a bit.
313
00:18:11,481 --> 00:18:14,319
Your father used to take you
out for a walk and people used to go
314
00:18:14,320 --> 00:18:15,561
"Oh, is he adopted?"
315
00:18:17,801 --> 00:18:18,841
Adopted? Yes!
316
00:18:20,601 --> 00:18:23,201
No, love, no, you're
the image of my father.
317
00:18:23,202 --> 00:18:26,960
Really? Oh, yes, son.
You're the spit of him.
318
00:18:26,961 --> 00:18:28,479
I knew it the day you were born.
319
00:18:28,480 --> 00:18:31,441
I held you up, I even put
a fag in your mouth to be sure.
320
00:18:32,881 --> 00:18:34,161
See you later, Ma.
321
00:18:37,201 --> 00:18:39,641
Cathy, it's not me. I'm not adopted.
322
00:18:43,041 --> 00:18:45,521
Mammy, I have some
amazing news for you.
323
00:18:45,522 --> 00:18:46,680
What, Rory?
324
00:18:46,681 --> 00:18:47,921
I'm getting married.
325
00:18:53,081 --> 00:18:56,361
Are you sure? I mean, Rory,
have you thought this through?
326
00:18:56,362 --> 00:18:57,520
Yes, Mammy.
327
00:18:57,521 --> 00:19:00,519
I've never been more sure
of anything in my whole life.
328
00:19:00,520 --> 00:19:02,559
Oh, well then I'm delighted for you.
329
00:19:02,560 --> 00:19:03,601
Ah, thanks, Mammy!
330
00:19:05,881 --> 00:19:09,080
There you go, pet.
What's up with Rory?
331
00:19:09,081 --> 00:19:10,960
He's getting married.
332
00:19:10,961 --> 00:19:14,280
That's fantastic. Are you delighted?
333
00:19:14,281 --> 00:19:15,800
Kind of.
334
00:19:15,801 --> 00:19:18,641
I'm dreading what will
happen when he tells Dino.
335
00:19:21,241 --> 00:19:24,041
Crisps! Ah, shite.
336
00:19:31,201 --> 00:19:33,640
This is your life.
337
00:19:33,641 --> 00:19:34,800
What's that?
338
00:19:34,801 --> 00:19:38,559
It's my photo album, Mammy.
I was just looking through it.
339
00:19:38,560 --> 00:19:41,159
And do you know what I noticed
when I was looking at this?
340
00:19:41,160 --> 00:19:43,801
There are no baby photos of me.
Really?
341
00:19:43,802 --> 00:19:46,640
None at all. None? Not even one.
342
00:19:46,641 --> 00:19:48,120
Jesus, that's odd.
343
00:19:48,121 --> 00:19:49,601
Now, why would that be?
344
00:19:50,641 --> 00:19:52,241
Maybe you were an ugly baby?
345
00:19:54,041 --> 00:19:55,880
I'm only joking.
346
00:19:55,881 --> 00:19:58,559
Do you know,
I'm a shocking mother, Cathy.
347
00:19:58,560 --> 00:20:00,519
You were my
fourth child in four years.
348
00:20:00,520 --> 00:20:02,721
I was in labour longer than
feckin' Harold Wilson!
349
00:20:05,281 --> 00:20:07,879
I had a house full of kids,
a house full of shitty nappies
350
00:20:07,880 --> 00:20:09,399
and an alcoholic husband.
351
00:20:09,400 --> 00:20:13,041
Why wasn't I running around going
"Where's my fuckin' camera?"
352
00:20:14,921 --> 00:20:17,841
Sometimes I don't feel
I'm part of this family.
353
00:20:17,842 --> 00:20:20,681
And sometimes you
act like you're not.
354
00:20:23,241 --> 00:20:25,600
"'What's your name,' he said.
355
00:20:25,601 --> 00:20:27,281
"'Mmph, mmph, mmph,' she said."
356
00:20:31,321 --> 00:20:33,481
They all lived happily ever after.
357
00:20:35,441 --> 00:20:36,680
Hello, Granny.
358
00:20:36,681 --> 00:20:41,280
Hello, Bono. Look at you, big boy,
all dressed up for school.
359
00:20:41,281 --> 00:20:43,040
Guess what? What?
360
00:20:43,041 --> 00:20:44,719
I'm not going to Australia.
361
00:20:44,720 --> 00:20:46,199
Oh, Bono, don't start that again.
362
00:20:46,200 --> 00:20:48,919
You are going. You have to go
with your Mammy and your Daddy.
363
00:20:48,920 --> 00:20:51,639
What would they do in Australia
without you?
364
00:20:51,640 --> 00:20:53,041
They're not going either.
365
00:20:53,042 --> 00:20:55,360
They are, son. No, we're not, Ma.
366
00:20:55,361 --> 00:20:58,440
What? Betty got these printed.
367
00:20:58,441 --> 00:21:00,119
'Mark Brown and Son, Carpenters.'
368
00:21:00,120 --> 00:21:01,839
I put them around the houses
in the area.
369
00:21:01,840 --> 00:21:04,721
And more work for Mark than he can
handle. We can afford to stay.
370
00:21:04,722 --> 00:21:05,880
That's fantastic!
371
00:21:05,881 --> 00:21:07,441
See, I told you, Granny.
372
00:21:07,442 --> 00:21:08,920
That's great!
373
00:21:08,921 --> 00:21:11,321
Can I go upstairs
and play with Grandad's teeth?
374
00:21:11,322 --> 00:21:13,600
Of course you can. Off you go.
375
00:21:13,601 --> 00:21:15,200
Yes!
376
00:21:15,201 --> 00:21:17,559
Here, you, you're going to school.
No time for playing.
377
00:21:17,560 --> 00:21:18,801
Go and wait in the car.
378
00:21:20,721 --> 00:21:24,600
Sorry to intrude. Today's the day
we start the kitchen.
379
00:21:24,601 --> 00:21:27,120
Buster, Mammy doesn't need you.
380
00:21:27,121 --> 00:21:28,321
I'll be doing the kitchen.
381
00:21:28,322 --> 00:21:30,400
But what about compensation?
382
00:21:30,401 --> 00:21:31,479
What about this?
383
00:21:31,480 --> 00:21:34,401
You go away and I wont shove that
toolbox up your... Mark!
384
00:21:36,201 --> 00:21:37,521
That sounds good to me.
385
00:21:39,361 --> 00:21:41,800
Mark, do you want to buy a toolbox?
386
00:21:41,801 --> 00:21:43,280
Never used.
387
00:21:43,281 --> 00:21:44,361
No. Fair enough.
388
00:21:45,841 --> 00:21:48,119
Right, we'd better go too, Ma.
See you later.
389
00:21:48,120 --> 00:21:49,681
See you, love. Bye, Mrs Brown.
390
00:21:49,682 --> 00:21:52,240
Betty.
391
00:21:52,241 --> 00:21:53,281
Thank you.
392
00:22:02,041 --> 00:22:05,761
They're not going to Australia!
They're not going to Australia!
393
00:22:08,641 --> 00:22:10,280
Hello, Dino. Come in.
394
00:22:10,281 --> 00:22:11,961
Thank you, Mrs Brown.
395
00:22:14,761 --> 00:22:17,160
I'm glad you called over, Dino.
396
00:22:17,161 --> 00:22:19,081
I just wanted to say how sorry I am.
397
00:22:22,761 --> 00:22:24,561
Sorry? About what?
398
00:22:25,681 --> 00:22:28,160
About Rory not being gay anymore.
399
00:22:28,161 --> 00:22:30,760
He's not gay? No.
400
00:22:30,761 --> 00:22:33,721
And I don't know if he's told you
but he's getting married.
401
00:22:33,722 --> 00:22:35,520
I know. To me.
402
00:22:35,521 --> 00:22:37,721
So what you should do now
is you need...
403
00:22:40,521 --> 00:22:42,080
I beg your pardon?
404
00:22:42,081 --> 00:22:45,520
Rory and I are getting married
to each other.
405
00:22:45,521 --> 00:22:47,441
I don't think you can do that, son.
406
00:22:47,442 --> 00:22:50,080
Oh, we can and we are.
407
00:22:50,081 --> 00:22:52,640
I need time to think about this.
408
00:22:52,641 --> 00:22:53,760
Rory's not here.
409
00:22:53,761 --> 00:22:56,041
I know. Actually I came to see you.
410
00:22:56,042 --> 00:22:59,281
Me? Mother of the bri...
411
00:23:00,441 --> 00:23:02,600
Mother of the groo...
412
00:23:02,601 --> 00:23:05,160
Rory's mother?
413
00:23:05,161 --> 00:23:06,319
What's on your mind?
414
00:23:06,320 --> 00:23:09,081
I don't know how to ask this.
It's very delicate.
415
00:23:10,321 --> 00:23:12,400
Dino, you're marrying my son.
416
00:23:12,401 --> 00:23:14,760
He handcuffs you to the radiator.
417
00:23:14,761 --> 00:23:16,401
You probably lick his 99.
418
00:23:19,401 --> 00:23:21,001
What the fuck could be delicate?
419
00:23:23,041 --> 00:23:24,081
I suppose.
420
00:23:25,201 --> 00:23:28,040
Rory is beginning
to doubt his pedigree.
421
00:23:28,041 --> 00:23:30,800
He has parentage concerns.
422
00:23:30,801 --> 00:23:32,280
Who sired him?
423
00:23:32,281 --> 00:23:34,281
Does he even belong to this litter?
424
00:23:35,281 --> 00:23:38,321
Dino, either we do this in English
or you can fuck off.
425
00:23:40,441 --> 00:23:41,680
Is Rory adopted?
426
00:23:41,681 --> 00:23:43,920
Adopted? Don't be ridiculous.
427
00:23:43,921 --> 00:23:47,160
Oh, thank God.
Oh, he'll be so relieved.
428
00:23:47,161 --> 00:23:49,121
I'm sorry if I upset you
by bringing it up.
429
00:23:49,122 --> 00:23:52,160
Do I look upset? Not at all, son.
430
00:23:52,161 --> 00:23:55,040
Actually I think it's quite sweet.
431
00:23:55,041 --> 00:23:58,041
Time comes when we all need
somebody to stand up for us.
432
00:23:58,042 --> 00:23:59,760
I'm glad Rory has you.
433
00:23:59,761 --> 00:24:01,561
Thank you.
434
00:24:02,641 --> 00:24:03,721
OK.
435
00:24:07,041 --> 00:24:08,960
You're a good boy.
436
00:24:08,961 --> 00:24:11,281
Now, fuck off and
be good somewhere else.
437
00:24:13,721 --> 00:24:15,320
Dino?
438
00:24:15,321 --> 00:24:17,359
Why would Rory think he's adopted?
439
00:24:17,360 --> 00:24:20,279
Well, apparently Cathy and Mark
overheard you on the phone
440
00:24:20,280 --> 00:24:23,921
to some solicitor and they're
convinced one of them is adopted.
441
00:24:26,761 --> 00:24:28,321
Overheard?
442
00:24:30,121 --> 00:24:31,921
Serves them fuckin' right.
443
00:24:35,561 --> 00:24:37,320
Hiya, Mammy!
444
00:24:37,321 --> 00:24:39,440
Hello, love.
445
00:24:39,441 --> 00:24:40,481
Are you all right?
446
00:24:41,561 --> 00:24:42,841
Fine.
447
00:24:48,481 --> 00:24:50,921
I had a very interesting
conversation today
448
00:24:50,922 --> 00:24:52,400
with Dino about Rory.
449
00:24:52,401 --> 00:24:53,600
Really?
450
00:24:53,601 --> 00:24:57,320
You wont believe it.
Rory thought he was adopted.
451
00:24:57,321 --> 00:24:59,280
Oh, really?
452
00:24:59,281 --> 00:25:01,721
Where would
he get an idea like that?
453
00:25:01,722 --> 00:25:03,001
God only knows.
454
00:25:10,881 --> 00:25:13,280
Cathy, you're not adopted.
455
00:25:13,281 --> 00:25:14,440
I'm not?
456
00:25:14,441 --> 00:25:15,721
No, you feckin' eejit!
457
00:25:18,161 --> 00:25:19,520
Well, who is then?
458
00:25:19,521 --> 00:25:20,920
None of yous!
459
00:25:20,921 --> 00:25:24,839
That firm of solicitors handles
other stuff as well, you know.
460
00:25:24,840 --> 00:25:26,841
I didn't want to worry you and Mark.
461
00:25:28,001 --> 00:25:30,880
The company your father works for,
462
00:25:30,881 --> 00:25:33,840
they're trying to
cut his widow's pension.
463
00:25:33,841 --> 00:25:36,759
They said that they're having
an economic downturn.
464
00:25:36,760 --> 00:25:40,201
But your father died 25 years ago.
He didn't fuckin' cause it!
465
00:25:42,361 --> 00:25:45,881
They're representing the union,
they wanted papers. That's all.
466
00:25:45,882 --> 00:25:48,400
Sorry. And so you should be.
467
00:25:48,401 --> 00:25:50,480
Rory was terrified.
468
00:25:50,481 --> 00:25:51,960
And Mark too.
469
00:25:51,961 --> 00:25:53,480
I must talk to him.
470
00:25:53,481 --> 00:25:54,680
Oh, you should!
471
00:25:54,681 --> 00:25:58,081
We wouldn't want one of your sons
upset now, would we?
472
00:25:58,082 --> 00:25:59,320
No, we wouldn't.
473
00:25:59,321 --> 00:26:00,561
Excuse me, Miss!
474
00:26:01,721 --> 00:26:04,321
Do you believe I think more
of my boys than I do of you?
475
00:26:04,322 --> 00:26:05,960
I know it!
476
00:26:05,961 --> 00:26:07,760
Do you now?
477
00:26:07,761 --> 00:26:11,080
Well, let me tell you
something I know, Missy.
478
00:26:11,081 --> 00:26:13,679
Your son is your son
till he takes a wife.
479
00:26:13,680 --> 00:26:16,561
Your daughter's your daughter
all your life.
480
00:26:18,521 --> 00:26:19,561
Good night, Mammy.
481
00:26:21,001 --> 00:26:22,921
Good night.
482
00:26:25,121 --> 00:26:27,880
Life is all about relationships.
483
00:26:27,881 --> 00:26:30,641
Mark is not going to Australia,
but, if he did,
484
00:26:30,642 --> 00:26:34,480
would the distance between us
make him less my son? No.
485
00:26:34,481 --> 00:26:36,801
And Cathy has decided
to forgive Mick.
486
00:26:36,802 --> 00:26:39,920
Is that the right thing to do?
I don't know.
487
00:26:39,921 --> 00:26:42,560
Kieran, come on.
488
00:26:42,561 --> 00:26:43,961
Kieran on the camera.
489
00:26:45,281 --> 00:26:46,681
But it makes Cathy happy.
490
00:26:49,281 --> 00:26:50,441
Come on, dear.
491
00:26:51,521 --> 00:26:53,879
And what if
one of my children was adopted?
492
00:26:53,880 --> 00:26:55,599
What if they were all adopted?
493
00:26:55,600 --> 00:26:57,721
Would that make me
less their mother?
494
00:26:57,722 --> 00:26:58,761
No!
495
00:27:00,441 --> 00:27:02,481
Life is all about relationships.
496
00:27:06,801 --> 00:27:07,960
Mammy.
497
00:27:07,961 --> 00:27:09,880
Yes, love.
498
00:27:09,881 --> 00:27:13,240
Thanks for telling me I'm not
adopted.
499
00:27:13,241 --> 00:27:14,481
I was really worried.
500
00:27:15,681 --> 00:27:18,120
Worried about what for God's sake?
501
00:27:18,121 --> 00:27:20,440
Cathy, look at yourself.
502
00:27:20,441 --> 00:27:22,041
Who the fuck would adopt you?
503
00:27:30,241 --> 00:27:32,240
Good night!
36763
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