Original subtitles

NARRATOR: Tonight on "Ice Road Truckers-"

OK, are we ready, boys?

NARRATOR: Hugh risks it all with a rookie driver.

Oh my god, it's cracking.

NARRATOR: To save his season from crashing down.

HUGH: Come on!

It's going to be a long, long night.

NARRATOR: In the Yukon, Alex has a million dollar load riding

on the edge.

ALEX: Hold on, hold on, hold on, hold on!

NARRATOR: And on the Dalton--

[truck horn]

PORKCHOP: Get out of the way!

NARRATOR: Two haul road heavyweights battle it out.

Don't cut my throat to keep your nickname.

It's all about freight, man.

NARRATOR: For bragging rights and cold hard cash.

Suck on this, Jack.

JACK: Feels like it's my turn to kick some butt.

NARRATOR: But only one can be King of the Load Count.

DARRELL: Sucks to be you, Jack.

[theme music]

NARRATOR: Prudhoe Bay, Alaska.

47 below.

DARRELL: Rock and roll.

NARRATOR: Darrell Ward is looking for a back haul that'll

break his tie with Jack Jessee at the top of the load count.

I'm going to get a load and head back south.

You know, it ain't gonna take me long,

and I'm going to be ahead of Jack in the load count.

Going to get my dispatch and get the hell out of here.

Hey, Sim.

What's going on, Darrell?

Oh, you know.

Now, I need something to go back to town

with, back to Fairbanks.

Well, you're bob-tailing.

Just how it goes sometimes, you know?

So I'm bob-tailing.

SIMEON: It sucks, but you'll survive.

DARRELL: I go in there and they tell me

they don't have anything for me.

I've got to bobtail.

I see all kinds of loads sitting out here in this yard!

They've got to be going somewhere.

I'm sure there's something here going back to Fairbanks.

You know, [bleep]-ed up.

NARRATOR: Across the yard.

And he already has his privileges.

JACK: These guys already took care of me.

Got me a load going back.

NARRATOR: All road ace Jack Jessee's day is off to a better

start.

Sweet.

Sweet as my mama's pecan pie.

[bleep] That's Jack.

He got a load.

What's with that?

Hey, Darrell.

Well, how the [bleep] did you get a load?

I called from Coldfoot and pulled a little seniority

on that one.

Well, that's kind of [bleep]-ed-ed up, isn't it?

Not on my end, it's not.

So us new guys, we've got to [bleep] sit up here and wait

for [bleep]-ing loads.

All I'm doing is bob-tailing back,

wasting my [bleep]-ing-ing logbook hours.

You just come in and get them any time you want.

Yup.

A little seniority gets a long ways around here sometimes.

I get a few more tricks.

I can teach you a couple.

[bleep]

JACK: If there are back hauls to be had,

they ought to be given to the senior drivers, you know?

Give it to the people that have been here,

people that have proven themselves.

[music playing]

DARRELL: I'm here first, I get the [bleep]-ing-ing load.

Calling from Coldfoot to pull a load out from underneath me

is [bleep].

Don't dig in my pocket.

It's costing me [bleep]-ing-ing money.

You're costing Reno money, just so you can [bleep] be the ace

of the [bleep] haul road?

[bleep] you, Jack.

It's time somebody puts old Jack in his place.

NARRATOR: At the other end of the Dalton--

AUSTIN: Looks like no one's here.

NARRATOR: Austin Wheeler is the first to arrive

at the Fairbanks lot.

A little too early for them, I guess.

See if they left something in my box.

Oh yeah.

NARRATOR: All season--

Austin's been struggling to prove himself

as a heavy hauler.

[cb chatter]

AUSTIN: [bleep].

NARRATOR: Hoping to get the respect and top dollar paycheck

of a heavy haul driver.

AUSTIN: Steiger machine.

Pretty big machine.

60,000 pounds.

10 foot wide.

It's over in the mammoth yard.

That's a heavy haul, that's for sure.

You know, I've hauled all these heavy haul loads up there,

and well, I've shown them, and I've proved myself

that I'm not just some punk kid, that I know what I doing.

NARRATOR: Today will be his first solo heavy haul

up the Dalton.

AUSTIN: Let's hook on to this bad boy.

NARRATOR: And he'll be moving an oversized Quadrax snowplow.

AUSTIN: I'm trying to make a name for myself by,

you know, hauling the most loads,

hauling some of the biggest loads,

showing these guys that I have what it takes to be here.

Sweet.

They wouldn't let me work heavy hauling if they didn't think

I knew what I was doing.

Let's put the landing gear up.

Gosh darn it.

Nothing likes to work properly when it's cold.

NARRATOR: The load can't move with the landing gear frozen

in place.

[bleep]

NARRATOR: Austin has got to figure it out on his own.

I don't know.

NARRATOR: Or his heavy haul will be over

before he's out of the yard.

I'm just going to rig something

up so they don't come down.

I'm tired of [bleep] with these landing

gear all the freaking time.

[music playing]

[ratcheting]

What I had to do is take a chain

and wrap it around the landing gear,

and then tie them up to the trailer

so they won't fall down.

NARRATOR: He's got the load ready to go.

But now he's got to get the 30-ton plow up

the icy inclines of the Dalton.

Alone.

I always figure out a way.

And that's the way I've always been.

NARRATOR: 450 miles to the east, at the Cantung Mine.

ALEX: It's kind of like getting into a tank.

NARRATOR: Alex Debogorski is preparing for one of the most

valuable loads of his career.

ALEX: I'm interested in prospecting.

I'm interested in looking for gold.

I'm interested in other minerals, too.

So here I get a chance to go into an operating mine

and see how they do their work.

NARRATOR: Each year the mine produces over 6 million pounds

of tungsten.

ALEX: So what's in here now?

NARRATOR: Which is used in everything from light bulbs

to X-ray machines.

MAN: You got water, you got fresh air.

So when they had all those miners trapped underground

in South America, this is what they were in?

Something similar.

So they got any games or anything in here

to entertain them?

MAN: Just jokes.

You gotta make up your jokes?

Absolutely, yeah.

NARRATOR: Today, Alex is hauling a day's worth of tungsten ore

out of the mine.

So you're going to be at maximum weight.

There's 11 bags.

It's pretty valuable.

It's a million dollar load.

So no pressure.

[laughing]

Right there.

Great.

Take care.

Thank you very much.

NARRATOR: Safely delivering the load means once again facing

one of the most feared roads in the Yukon.

ALEX: One big truck outbound.

NARRATOR: Yesterday.

ALEX: I think I've got a problem here.

NARRATOR: The one-lane mine road's steep grades

and sheer cliffs almost took out the veteran.

ALEX: Hang on.

NARRATOR: And now he's got to head back down the mountain

with a million dollar load on the line.

ALEX: It's a pretty special load, because they've told me

it's worth a million dollars.

So I'd better look after it.

Thank you, dear God, for all your blessings and help.

Keep me safe.

Amen.

NARRATOR: 1,400 miles to the southeast,

at the edge of Lake Winnipeg.

HUGH: We need three loads up to Pauingassi today, three loads

of cement.

Rick's still sick.

NARRATOR: Hugh is desperate to get a profit on the books.

HUGH: Holy [bleep].

NARRATOR: This season, warm weather

has made the winter roads nearly un-drivable.

So we're just going into the water here.

NARRATOR: And a respiratory infection

has Rick on the sick list.

RICK: Why the [bleep] did it have to happen to me?

Why can't it be [bleep] Hugh down here?

NARRATOR: And it's forced Hugh to make a Hail Mary

play to save his season.

So he wrangled Vlad into it here.

So I got another guy, and he's never even been on the [bleep]

before.

NARRATOR: He's put together a convoy with dispatcher Vlad

Pleskot and the shop mechanic who's never driven on the ice.

Never driven across ice, never drilled holes in ice.

I've never done nothing on ice except put it in my drink.

Wish me luck.

OK, are we ready, boy?

Yeah, I guess now or never.

HUGH: I'm going to go on right now.

Vlad will come down, and then I'll tell him when it's safe,

and then he'll tell you when it's safe.

Git er done.

Let's rock and roll.

Hope nobody goes swimming.

Swimming.

NARRATOR: It's up to Hugh to get this ragtag

team over the crossing and see that no one ends up

at the bottom of the frozen lake.

[music playing]

It's cracking pretty good today.

You can hear it.

OK, you can probably head out there, Wilson.

Thank you.

Give her a try?

They're going to be cracking and popping the ice,

and I get to be the tail end of it all.

Oh, this is crazy.

This is crazy.

This is crazy, man.

OK.

NARRATOR: The first timer creeps forward with over 30,000 pounds

of cement and the weight of the season on his shoulders.

DEREK: Low gear on the water.

I guess low gear on the water coming on is good, right?

When you go on, just go as slow as you can, and then pick

her up.

Oh, it's cracking.

Oh!

Driving onto the ice here, I can hear it cracking already.

Oh my god, it's cracking.

Holy crap.

I hear it popping.

I hear the ice popping.

Big ass cracks here, man.

It's looking pretty wild right now, man.

Mechanic Derek there, he's pretty nervous.

Either he'll do it or he won't.

Wow.

Hey, there's a big truck coming at us,

so make sure you slow down when you get close to him.

When you meet a truck crossing on the ice,

you gotta slow right down, because the two waves

come together.

And you don't want that.

VLAD: I got to slow down, because the wave underneath

my ice is meeting his wave, so we cannot pop up the ice

in front of us.

DEREK: There's a big truck coming at me.

I'm going to slow right down to about 5k.

I better double check.

Hey, Hugo, 5k when you're passing a truck?

Yeah, just remember, Derek, whatever you do,

don't stop, because it's not rated for stopped weight.

No stopping on the ice.

10-4, 10-4.

Holy crap.

NARRATOR: In Manitoba, Canada--

OK, there is a big truck coming at us.

Oh, geez, man.

NARRATOR: Desperate to make some cash,

Hugh is leading a Hail Mary convoy across the ice

with dispatcher Vlad.

VLAD: I've got to slow down.

Oh my god, it's cracking.

NARRATOR: And the shop mechanic who's driving

on ice for the first time.

HUGH: Just remember, Derek, whatever you do,

don't stop, because it's not rated for stopped weight.

No stopping on the ice.

10-4, 10-4.

[dramatic music playing]

Holy crap.

OK.

I passed the truck.

Glad I'm rolling with Polar Bear, because if anybody's

going to teach me, it's going to be him.

OK, I'm the first one off the ice, and I made her.

Hope you guys make her.

And we are on the ground.

Heard stories of people going through, but holy crap, this

is cracking, man.

Oh, jeez.

I made her.

If my old man saw me now, he'd be proud.

[truck horn]

NARRATOR: Hugh gets his team across the lake.

While, you popped your cherry, and welcome to the ice road

truckers.

NARRATOR: And the mechanic survives his first ice

crossing.

DEREK: Officially an ice road trucker now.

NARRATOR: 1,800 miles to the Northwest.

PORKCHOP: We got a hot load of freight on this truck.

Get there as quick as we can.

NARRATOR: Ronald "Porkchop" Mangum

is racing up the road to get his season back on track.

By God, I'ma win this load count.

And I'm gonna show them just how big a boy I am, by God.

NARRATOR: Two days ago--

Prudhoe Bay, get the hell out of the way.

Here comes the Chop.

NARRATOR: He was unleashed on his first solo run up

the Dalton.

First trip to freaking Prudhoe, by myself, baby.

NARRATOR: And only two loads off the lead,

he's making good time with a light load of construction

supplies.

PORKCHOP: I only have about a 10,000 pound load on it

right now.

It's so light, I'm going to have to end up juicing up

the speed a little bit to get up these hills, get

my momentum going.

Looks like we got a truck coming up here.

Slow old fuel trucks.

I wish they'd get out my way.

Get over!

He needs to get out the way before I lose momentum.

This is ridiculous.

NARRATOR: Without enough momentum

to carry him up Koyukuk's steep grade,

Porkchop's light load could easily spin out.

PORKCHOP: 10 miles an hour up the hill, and as heavy as he is

and as light as I am, I've got to keep my speed up

on these hills.

This is ridiculous.

He's got plenty of pulling weight.

He should have let me come by.

If I lose traction on this, we're screwed.

Damn it, boy, we're spinning.

Spinning like hell.

This is ridiculous.

Spinning out, can't keep no damn traction, I'm so light.

[dramatic music playing]

[truck horn]

Move!

Move!

Damn!

[truck horn]

PORKCHOP: Thank God.

[honking]

It's frickin' ridiculous.

NARRATOR: The aggressive move gets the tanker out of the way

and the load up the Koyukuk.

PORKCHOP: It's a hot load of freight,

but it's gonna get there when I get it there.

NARRATOR: While Porkchop charges north,

another Dalton newcomer is on his way south.

DARRELL: If you've got to cheat to win, you're not the ace.

NARRATOR: Darrell Ward's driven 250 miles without a load

after losing out on a back hauls to rival Jack Jessee.

I'm going up against the haul road ace.

I'm chasing him for load count.

That's what this is all about.

Hi there.

Yeah.

I had an emergency back home.

Had to return to Fairbanks.

Please run this load to Prudhoe for me.

Thanks.

Zeke.

Right on.

Huh.

I ain't eating breakfast.

I'm going to get out of here.

I've got a [bleep] load.

That's cool.

That'll [bleep] do it.

Sucks to be you, Jack.

Play your [bleep] games on me.

NARRATOR: After a stroke of luck,

Darrell is heading back to Prudhoe Bay

with a load of drill pipe that will keep him tied with Jack.

I'm going to hook up to this load and get the [bleep] out

of here.

Pulls his [bleep] on me, you know.

That's karma for you.

It's got me an extra load, is what it did.

Nice.

Right on, man.

Awesome.

He might be Jack Jessee.

He might be the ace of the haul road.

But I know what I can do.

I'll take him down.

[truck horn]

DARRELL: Looks like Jack made it here with my load.

Maybe I ought to have a nice little word with him.

See what happens when you take my load?

Yeah.

That's all right!

I got my own load.

Yeah. DARRELL: On down the road.

You got one, I got one waiting when I get back.

Well, I hope I got one waiting up there.

I'll meet you on the road somewhere.

Unless you're calling them, telling them not to give me

one, you know?

If that's how you stay on top of the load count, you know,

that's--

No.

You know, don't cut my throat to keep your nickname.

It's all about freight, man.

NARRATOR: Neck and neck in the dash for the cash, Darrell

hits the road for Prudhoe Bay while Jack

makes a break for Fairbanks.

DARRELL: It's all good for my load county and my paycheck,

you know.

The new guys are complaining they don't get the loads that I

get, as many runs as I get, you know?

But it's one of the benefits of being a senior driver out here.

NARRATOR: 450 miles to the east.

Tractor trailer southbound, Eagle Pass.

Alex Debogorski is hauling a million dollar load

of tungsten, and it's one of the most valuable of his career.

We can't handle any surprises today,

because it's so slippery.

I guess we will have to manage the best way we can.

NARRATOR: And he's taking it over the unforgiving mine road.

[dramatic music playing]

The number one thing here is icy conditions.

So very little traction for turning.

NARRATOR: The road is barely wider than a big rig.

If Alex loses traction and slips too close to the edge,

gravity will do the rest.

Come on, move.

Move!

Get up the hill.

Whoa, boy.

No.

Stop!

Get up the hill.

NARRATOR: Riding 3,500 feet above sea level--

ALEX: Whoa, boy.

Whoa!

NARRATOR: Alex Debogorski's million dollar load of tungsten

is out of control.

ALEX: Stop!

NARRATOR: He's missed a shift, sending the truck rolling

toward the edge.

That wasn't exactly what I wanted to do.

NARRATOR: The veteran puts it in gear for another shot

at that 10% grade.

Come on.

Come on.

You know, it's a pretty long way down.

I don't want to have to have a closer look.

Back in business.

NARRATOR: Alex is over the first major incline.

ALEX: Thank you, Lord.

In Jesus' name I pray.

Amen.

NARRATOR: But over a dozen remain

on the 120-mile-long mine road.

I guess we will have to manage the best way we can.

We still got a long way to go.

NARRATOR: 450 miles to the west.

I'm really excited about pulling this thing up there.

A machine like that can cost $300,000.

NARRATOR: Austin Wheeler is riding

high with an oversized plow on his first solo

heavy haul up the Dalton.

It kind of shows people what I'm made of

and what I'm capable of, so I'm totally stoked for that.

I think Lane gave this load to me because he realized, like,

yeah, Austin is capable of doing whatever I throw at him.

And I am.

I don't let anybody down.

I always try my hardest to get the job done, no matter

what it takes.

NARRATOR: But just ahead is a 25-mile hill, where drivers

have to slow down for the left hand turn

but keep enough momentum to make it up the 8% grade.

All right.

Thank you, sir.

Just got word from a driver over the CB

that this hill that we're climbing up was a little slick.

But the more I look at it and examine the road,

it doesn't look too slick at all.

So I'm not going to worry about throwing chains

on it or nothing.

Can't even steer.

Just get it out.

[bleep] damn it!

NARRATOR: Austin's call to try the hill without chains

has him right in the path of oncoming traffic.

ALEX: Holy-- whoa!

It's a pretty bad situation to get into.

People can't see you when they're coming down the hill.

That's why I tried to hurry up and act fast.

It's just a rookie mistake.

It's pretty [bleep] stupid.

NARRATOR: 50 miles to the north.

This load I got is like the cream of the crop right now.

NARRATOR: Jack Jessee is racing to Fairbanks

to hold on to his lead in the load count.

JACK: This is probably the easiest back haul

you could ever have.

Just light enough that I can make some really good time

here.

NARRATOR: But even on a nice day on the Dalton isn't easy.

JACK: Sun's coming up more.

It's low on the horizon.

With all the ice on the road, we get double glare.

Everything's totally white out here.

You'll be seeing spots for the next week.

You can't see anything but a big orange ball.

Holy mother-[bleep].

Look out.

Tail slide.

That almost took us out right there.

[bleep]

Whoa.

NARRATOR: While Jack heads south battling the blinding sun,

200 miles north--

We got a nice rough stretch of road for a while.

NARRATOR: Rival Darrell Ward is heading into darkness.

You hit these rough roads likes this, man, you

know, you can bust springs, suspension, airbags, break

wheels.

Pretty hazardous.

[dramatic music playing]

Whoa.

[bleep] caribou, man.

My brakes are locking up.

NARRATOR: 150 miles south of Prudhoe Bay--

I mean, it's rough.

NARRATOR: After scoring an unexpected haul,

Darrell is racing north to get ahead

of Jack in the load count.

Whoa.

Caribou, man.

My brakes are locking up.

[bleep] Whoa!

[horn honking]

Caribou, man, mysteriously appear in the road right

in front of me.

How?

I don't know.

Like a [bleep] freight train.

They make a hole for me.

It was close, man.

I mean, it was real close.

NARRATOR: 70 miles to the north--

Gotta get up here and get this load off and get back

to Fairbanks.

NARRATOR: Porkchop is an hour outside

of Prudhoe Bay with a load of construction supplies.

PORKCHOP: I got this.

Southbound.

All the way.

Great.

Damn, boy, appreciate it.

Be careful.

I was talking to a driver on the radio.

He said this fog is in and out all the way to Prudhoe.

I don't know what ice fog is, but it sucks driving in it.

[bleep]

Friggin' ridiculous.

Visibility is down to about an eighth

of a mile, maybe a quarter mile.

It went from great driving weather to crappy driving

weather.

NARRATOR: At temperatures below minus 40, water in the air

freezes, forming a thick fog made of ice.

PORKCHOP: Made up a little bit of time.

Now I'm losing it again because of all this ice fog.

Ain't no catching a break on time now.

It's real treacherous right now, trying to see out through here.

I can't see a thing.

[truck horn]

PORKCHOP: Oh, [bleep].

Oh, [bleep]!

Man, it's real tough to see.

The main thing is I'd rather get there safe than dead, that's

for sure.

NARRATOR: Finally--

Yee-haw!

NARRATOR: The lights of Prudhoe Bay break through the fog.

PORKCHOP: You can't stop the Chop, baby.

NARRATOR: And after two successful solo runs,

Porkchop is on a hot streak.

PORKCHOP: Had an expedited load, got it up here as quick

as I could.

I got here safe and sound.

I'm a long way from my family.

I'm here in Prudhoe.

And I miss my family, but it's one more for them, too.

NARRATOR: 2,000 miles to the southeast.

That must be Pauingassi up there.

NARRATOR: Hugh has managed to get his convoy across the ice

and up the winter roads.

HUGH: OK, we're in Pauingassi.

That's where we're at.

This is where we're supposed to be.

The end of the journey, man.

HUGH: Holy [bleep].

Hey!

Wow.

I'm just going to park up here, make sure there's

enough room for everybody.

NARRATOR: But the late arrival means there is no one

around to offload the cargo.

I don't believe they open until, like, noon tomorrow.

NARRATOR: But for Hugh, there is no time for another failed

trip.

HUGH: We ain't got much time to sit around.

NARRATOR: And the Polar Bear takes matters

into his own hands.

HUGH: I'm not quitting.

I never quit.

HUGH: What the hell.

NARRATOR: But even the forklift is busted.

NARRATOR: Once again, Hugh is forced to improvise.

[dramatic music playing]

Watch out, here we go.

NARRATOR: Each bag weighs over 3,000 pounds

and is worth 500 bucks.

VLAD: Careful, careful, careful!

HUGH: Oh!

NARRATOR: In Manitoba, Canada--

NARRATOR: After showing up late for the offload,

Hugh is taking matters into his own hands

to get three loads on the books.

HUGH: Oh!

You got to be joking.

NARRATOR: But the cement bags are barely making it

off the trucks intact.

NARRATOR: There's nearly $20,000 on the line,

and just one busted bag will eat away at Hugh's profit.

[bleep]

HUGH: Damn it.

Well, we got one truck unloaded now.

And two more to go.

NARRATOR: 13 bags down.

HUGH: Watch yourself.

He's going to back up.

NARRATOR: 26 to go.

HUGH: Come on!

NARRATOR: So far--

HUGH: This is a great big cluster [bleep]..

NARRATOR: The bags are battered but unbroken.

HUGH: I've just about had enough of that [bleep]..

Come on.

Come on, stick with it.

Hell yeah!

NARRATOR: After a rough start--

NARRATOR: The Polar Bear gets the hang of it.

HUGH: We basically had to chain every bag up,

and then I don't know what it took, four or five hours,

unloading all three loads, but we got them off.

VLAD: Mission possible.

Done!

It's like 4 or 5:00 in the morning.

I'm dirty, I'm soaked, I'm tired, I'm hungry.

But we got the load done, and that's the most important

thing.

[horn honking]

NARRATOR: 1,800 miles to the northwest--

We're starting in to crunch time right now,

and this is where it really matters.

NARRATOR: Haul road ace Jack Jessee pulls into Carlisle

and takes the lead in the load count.

No BSing around.

Get the job done.

Feels like it's my turn to kick some butt now.

NARRATOR: But at the other end of the Dalton--

Got the lights of Prudhoe Bay right here ahead of me.

NARRATOR: Jack's lead is short lived as Darrell delivers

his load of drill pipe.

It was a perfect day for me.

Life is good today.

Sucks to be you, Jack.

Go in here, see if dispatch is around, if there's anybody

here, and figure out which ones of these pieces of paper I

need to turn in.

Nobody here, huh?

Well, that blows.

Inbound, outbound.

OK, do I have anything here?

For Darrell, here we go.

Line haul manifest.

Let's go find it.

RV1173.

NARRATOR: The day started with a back haul for Jack.

But it ends with a back haul for the Montana legend.

DARRELL: I was a little pissed off last night

over the whole deal, and made it to Coldfoot,

and there's a load sitting right there for me, you know?

I'm already caught up to Jack in the load count.

You know, Jack's going to be following me.

NARRATOR: And now Darrell's the one with the upper hand.

DARRELL: The good Lord looks after those

who take care of themselves.

NARRATOR: But while the two heavyweights battle it out--

AUSTIN: We're unloading this Steiger machine.

NARRATOR: 23-year-old Austin Wheeler is hot on their heels

with the delivery of his first solo heavy haul.

AUSTIN: Took some real thought and skill.

It's been a really long day.

I'm tired.

It's time to go to bed.

NARRATOR: And now there's a three way tie for the load

count lead.

In Canada--

ALEX: The load has been delivered.

I made it.

NARRATOR: Alex pulls into Watson Lake with his million dollar

load of tungsten ore.

ALEX: North is great, the ice is great.

But if they want to send me back to another mine,

that's fine too.

I'll go wherever they send me.

NARRATOR: Next time on "Ice Road Truckers--"

I'm seeing a whole bunch of white.

Where are we?

NARRATOR: The veteran fights Hurricane Alley.

ALEX: Yeah, I don't think this is a very good idea.

NARRATOR: In Alaska.

Come on, Kitty Kenworth.

NARRATOR: The Dalton fights back.

PORKCHOP: Holy [bleep].

Whoa, whoa.

Catch him, catch him, come on.

NARRATOR: And no one is safe from Mother Nature's fury.

Oh, [bleep] me.

ALEX: There, ice road trucking for you.