Would you like to inspect the original subtitles? These are the user uploaded subtitles that are being translated:
1
00:00:00,040 --> 00:00:01,040
Thank you.
2
00:00:58,380 --> 00:00:59,380
No,
3
00:01:01,540 --> 00:01:03,700
no, no. A gente não deveria estar aqui.
4
00:01:04,040 --> 00:01:05,560
A selva não quer a gente aqui.
5
00:01:06,720 --> 00:01:07,720
Tem.
6
00:01:39,820 --> 00:01:41,200
We have to do this.
7
00:01:42,040 --> 00:01:44,240
What's waiting for us will change our
lives.
8
00:01:45,700 --> 00:01:47,140
Right? Fine.
9
00:01:48,500 --> 00:01:49,500
I'm going alone.
10
00:01:49,780 --> 00:01:51,480
Ana! Ana!
11
00:01:52,880 --> 00:01:53,880
Don't do this!
12
00:02:36,140 --> 00:02:37,300
Hey! No!
13
00:02:37,640 --> 00:02:38,640
No!
14
00:02:56,140 --> 00:03:01,080
We start tight on a full moon, milky,
almost yellow.
15
00:03:02,220 --> 00:03:08,780
We crane down to reveal an idyllic
suburban street.
16
00:03:09,500 --> 00:03:15,360
We float past a series of white picket
fences until we settle on a sewer grate.
17
00:03:16,100 --> 00:03:17,860
It flies open.
18
00:03:18,340 --> 00:03:20,860
Something big and scaly slid it out.
19
00:03:21,160 --> 00:03:24,320
Fat, hungry, definitely not human.
20
00:03:24,840 --> 00:03:26,740
as a pulsating score kicks in.
21
00:03:36,100 --> 00:03:40,800
We're on the back of the beast as it
slithers menacingly towards a little
22
00:03:40,800 --> 00:03:41,800
house.
23
00:03:57,369 --> 00:04:01,250
wedding video you're talking about.
Yeah, though I actually don't think of
24
00:04:01,250 --> 00:04:05,790
as videos. They're more like short
films. Yeah, because I'm not sure this
25
00:04:05,790 --> 00:04:07,370
quite what we had in mind.
26
00:04:07,650 --> 00:04:11,370
Okay, I know. It's a little different
than normal, but... I really like the
27
00:04:11,370 --> 00:04:12,730
you did for Karen and Bart.
28
00:04:12,950 --> 00:04:17,149
When they walk by the river and jump up
and down. That jump was dope. And I love
29
00:04:17,149 --> 00:04:22,230
that song they used. I don't want to
wait for our lives to be over.
30
00:04:22,550 --> 00:04:25,690
I want to know right now, how does it
feel?
31
00:04:29,550 --> 00:04:34,230
like you guys and you said you're horror
fans and i'm like i love horror so much
32
00:04:34,230 --> 00:04:38,110
and i thought this could be special you
know what i mean this is a film you're
33
00:04:38,110 --> 00:04:42,410
going to watch for the rest of your life
but this isn't a film doug this is a
34
00:04:42,410 --> 00:04:46,870
wedding video and we want one where they
do a little jump yeah can you do that
35
00:04:46,870 --> 00:04:47,870
for us or not
36
00:04:59,470 --> 00:05:01,670
Oh, yeah, I feel much crazier.
37
00:05:01,890 --> 00:05:02,829
Okay, good.
38
00:05:02,830 --> 00:05:07,890
Does it sound better to say my line, his
vision is blurry, which could suggest,
39
00:05:08,150 --> 00:05:12,630
or his vision is blurry, which could
suggest, or I could, you know what, I
40
00:05:12,630 --> 00:05:15,830
even do it like an accent. I could do it
just... Oh, I think you should do it
41
00:05:15,830 --> 00:05:16,910
the way you auditioned it, honey.
42
00:05:17,130 --> 00:05:18,130
Yeah. Yeah.
43
00:05:18,170 --> 00:05:21,790
It's been a while since I've booked
anything, and I just want it to go well.
44
00:05:22,050 --> 00:05:24,130
Yeah. Just power it out there.
45
00:05:26,030 --> 00:05:27,970
Sorry. Doctor number three?
46
00:05:28,300 --> 00:05:29,820
We're ready for you. Okay, knock him
down.
47
00:05:30,200 --> 00:05:31,200
Okay, thanks.
48
00:05:31,240 --> 00:05:35,260
Thank you, Donna. Hey, by the way, if
you ever need anything from Lowe's, I
49
00:05:35,260 --> 00:05:37,060
hook you up with my employee discount,
no question.
50
00:05:38,840 --> 00:05:39,840
Okay.
51
00:05:45,020 --> 00:05:46,460
Demo with these days of tramadol?
52
00:05:47,040 --> 00:05:48,680
Any idea what I'm looking at here?
53
00:05:48,900 --> 00:05:52,860
He said his vision was blurry, so, you
know, that could suggest... Baltic
54
00:05:52,860 --> 00:05:53,860
neuritis.
55
00:05:54,400 --> 00:05:55,500
Already ruled that out.
56
00:05:55,880 --> 00:05:56,880
Cut!
57
00:05:57,220 --> 00:06:01,180
Hey, buddy, not sure what that accident
is. Just do it normally, okay?
58
00:06:01,900 --> 00:06:03,280
We're gonna go again right away.
59
00:06:03,960 --> 00:06:09,080
He said his vision was blurry, which
could suggest... Cut!
60
00:06:09,480 --> 00:06:11,900
Say the line faster, okay? Faster this
time.
61
00:06:12,140 --> 00:06:14,620
He said his vision was blurry, which
could suggest... Cut!
62
00:06:15,060 --> 00:06:18,160
I think we gotta fire this guy. Can we
get somebody else in here?
63
00:07:17,290 --> 00:07:21,170
Jerry. What is this thing about some
kind of sewer monster?
64
00:07:22,770 --> 00:07:23,770
Oh, boy.
65
00:07:25,630 --> 00:07:26,630
Doug.
66
00:07:27,730 --> 00:07:31,490
Look, I get that this is not what you
dreamed about when you were a kid.
67
00:07:32,270 --> 00:07:33,530
But dreams, they go.
68
00:07:34,170 --> 00:07:39,530
Now, I'll be retiring soon, and Doug, it
is only a matter of time before all
69
00:07:39,530 --> 00:07:40,530
this is yours.
70
00:07:40,670 --> 00:07:42,230
Really? Yeah. Look around.
71
00:07:42,970 --> 00:07:43,970
Take it all in.
72
00:07:45,050 --> 00:07:46,050
And imagine.
73
00:07:48,140 --> 00:07:52,500
If you do it right, it's a pretty sweet
setup we got here. This is a B and maybe
74
00:07:52,500 --> 00:07:54,740
even a B plus life we're talking about.
75
00:07:57,480 --> 00:08:00,840
Are you sure you don't want to do
anything for your birthday?
76
00:08:01,360 --> 00:08:03,860
You should make me celebrate your half
birthday.
77
00:08:05,340 --> 00:08:06,520
Let's go get a beer.
78
00:08:07,540 --> 00:08:08,540
Something.
79
00:08:10,020 --> 00:08:12,500
Maybe we should watch that new mountain
climbing doc.
80
00:08:12,780 --> 00:08:15,120
About the lady that falls to her own
death?
81
00:08:16,000 --> 00:08:17,000
Yeah.
82
00:08:19,099 --> 00:08:21,700
about the free diver in the Maldives.
83
00:08:22,180 --> 00:08:26,940
I don't know. Let's just take a gummy
and go to bed early.
84
00:08:30,420 --> 00:08:31,500
Oh, my God. No.
85
00:08:32,500 --> 00:08:37,740
Yes, yes. You love a good big birthday
party. You knew about this?
86
00:08:38,059 --> 00:08:38,919
It was my idea.
87
00:08:38,919 --> 00:08:42,340
Buddy, take my coat, please. Thank you.
Hey, how are you?
88
00:08:43,419 --> 00:08:44,420
I'm sorry.
89
00:08:46,120 --> 00:08:51,270
No, that's not... The actual lotion, the
actual basket. It puts the lotion in
90
00:08:51,270 --> 00:08:55,570
the basket? eBay, buddy. Judy, that is
sick. Yeah, no, that is actually sick.
91
00:08:55,970 --> 00:09:00,270
Oh! Happy birthday, Dougie. Thanks for
making the trip, Claire.
92
00:09:00,730 --> 00:09:02,710
Oh, you know I love Buffalo this time of
year.
93
00:09:03,090 --> 00:09:05,130
The blush, the hypothermia.
94
00:09:05,630 --> 00:09:06,730
What's up? No Trent?
95
00:09:07,010 --> 00:09:08,010
No Trent.
96
00:09:08,190 --> 00:09:09,310
Ever again, in fact.
97
00:09:09,730 --> 00:09:11,830
He started banging his dental hygienist.
98
00:09:12,110 --> 00:09:15,010
Anyway, tonight is all about you, baby.
99
00:09:15,290 --> 00:09:16,990
It's about me. It's about you.
100
00:09:19,780 --> 00:09:21,460
You came! Here you are!
101
00:09:21,820 --> 00:09:22,739
Oh, my God.
102
00:09:22,740 --> 00:09:23,920
It's been too long, pal.
103
00:09:24,160 --> 00:09:26,700
It's so good to see you. It has been way
too long. Happy birthday.
104
00:09:26,980 --> 00:09:28,820
Thank you for coming out here.
105
00:09:29,060 --> 00:09:32,060
You don't want to miss this? Never.
We've got a lot of catching up to do.
106
00:09:32,340 --> 00:09:37,760
Many years ago, a group of young,
passionate artists had a vision.
107
00:09:37,960 --> 00:09:43,120
It was a vision that's not particularly
original or even good.
108
00:09:43,520 --> 00:09:45,040
But it was there.
109
00:09:45,480 --> 00:09:46,540
And so...
110
00:09:47,340 --> 00:09:48,660
that vision a reality.
111
00:09:49,240 --> 00:09:55,920
And without further ado, I present to
you a completely unrestored print
112
00:09:55,920 --> 00:10:01,900
of 13 -year -old Doug McAllister's
masterpiece, The Quatch.
113
00:10:02,580 --> 00:10:05,540
What? I thought we lost all the copies
of that.
114
00:10:05,820 --> 00:10:09,490
Nope. I found it in my mom's garage. It
was stuck in the player. Are we sure
115
00:10:09,490 --> 00:10:11,350
this is okay for the kids to watch?
116
00:10:11,570 --> 00:10:15,230
I don't give a shit. Mrs. Brown had us
bleep all the swears so we could show it
117
00:10:15,230 --> 00:10:18,450
at the school assembly. It didn't make
much sense because we were very clear
118
00:10:18,450 --> 00:10:20,750
about it being R -rated. Happy birthday,
pal.
119
00:10:21,030 --> 00:10:22,170
This isn't happening.
120
00:10:22,430 --> 00:10:23,990
Oh, it's happening. Here we go.
121
00:10:25,650 --> 00:10:26,650
Oh,
122
00:10:27,410 --> 00:10:28,410
I'm going to kill you.
123
00:10:31,930 --> 00:10:33,350
I haven't changed a bit.
124
00:10:50,010 --> 00:10:51,710
We've been watching a lot of Scorsese.
125
00:10:52,550 --> 00:10:54,450
He didn't quite have the ear for it, did
we?
126
00:11:07,240 --> 00:11:08,300
So much charisma.
127
00:11:08,580 --> 00:11:12,460
I'm glad you had it. I still can't
believe I let Doug Cockney do that.
128
00:11:12,980 --> 00:11:14,200
Cockney, but it was your idea.
129
00:11:18,660 --> 00:11:20,340
He's coming for us. We're trapped.
130
00:11:20,640 --> 00:11:21,940
What the hell are we going to do?
131
00:11:22,400 --> 00:11:27,140
Oh, my God. We're all going to die.
132
00:11:31,220 --> 00:11:32,780
This is where it gets real.
133
00:11:33,520 --> 00:11:34,780
Not on my watch.
134
00:11:54,960 --> 00:11:57,900
Well, I'm giving it to you. It left the
TV because you can't get it out.
135
00:12:02,900 --> 00:12:04,620
It was right after.
136
00:12:04,920 --> 00:12:09,320
Right after your year of college. Yeah,
that's when Anaconda came out. Remember,
137
00:12:09,360 --> 00:12:10,480
we saw it like 30 times.
138
00:12:10,760 --> 00:12:12,420
Put it right there alongside the
classic.
139
00:12:12,620 --> 00:12:16,080
Totally. How about that cat? Come on. J
-Lo? Ice Cube?
140
00:12:16,720 --> 00:12:17,719
Owen Wilson?
141
00:12:17,720 --> 00:12:19,180
Stoltz? I mean, it's a murderer's row.
142
00:12:19,400 --> 00:12:23,940
Plus, the snake was like a metaphor for
our lives at that moment.
143
00:12:26,960 --> 00:12:33,880
is coming at you hunting you and forcing
you like off your back like
144
00:12:33,880 --> 00:12:40,580
your parents health insurance i don't
know no it's true
145
00:12:40,580 --> 00:12:46,780
it wasn't like that how about that uh
accent by john boyd how about that's a
146
00:12:46,780 --> 00:12:51,220
choice they get you wrap around you and
you do you get the privilege of hearing
147
00:12:51,220 --> 00:12:53,760
your bone break before the power
148
00:13:03,080 --> 00:13:09,540
the rights to anaconda what i have the
rights to anaconda
149
00:13:09,540 --> 00:13:16,520
yeah apparently the movie was based on a
novel by some dead japanese
150
00:13:16,520 --> 00:13:23,420
guy and my agent introduced me to his
widow unbelievably she she
151
00:13:23,420 --> 00:13:28,200
was such a fan of the four episodes that
i did on swat that she gave me the
152
00:13:28,200 --> 00:13:32,820
right so what are you gonna do with them
Uh, well, not me.
153
00:13:34,720 --> 00:13:38,220
I... We're going to reboot the thing.
154
00:13:38,860 --> 00:13:39,860
Indie style.
155
00:13:39,920 --> 00:13:40,920
Three weeks.
156
00:13:40,960 --> 00:13:42,780
Run and gun. In the Amazon.
157
00:13:43,720 --> 00:13:47,440
Skeletal crew. Claire, you and I can
star. Penny, you shoot it. Doug, you
158
00:13:47,440 --> 00:13:49,480
direct. Huh? Come on. What do you think?
159
00:13:49,960 --> 00:13:55,580
I mean, it's a wonderful idea in theory,
but... I mean, I need time off from
160
00:13:55,580 --> 00:13:57,520
work. Yes, you can, Kenny. Sweet.
161
00:13:57,740 --> 00:14:01,240
Kenny, what are you talking about? Yes,
you're it. No, he's not in.
162
00:14:01,460 --> 00:14:04,840
He said, like, one thing and you're in
already. You're going to the Amazon.
163
00:14:05,120 --> 00:14:06,660
He's not in. What do you say, Claire?
164
00:14:07,380 --> 00:14:11,920
I just, I don't know if I'm in the right
headspace right now. Of course you are.
165
00:14:12,120 --> 00:14:15,360
Of course you're not in the right
headspace. It's the best headspace. Are
166
00:14:15,360 --> 00:14:18,900
kidding me? Come on. It's like he pray
love and shit.
167
00:14:19,420 --> 00:14:20,420
Come on.
168
00:14:21,360 --> 00:14:22,360
You know what?
169
00:14:22,720 --> 00:14:23,720
I'm in.
170
00:14:26,860 --> 00:14:28,140
Totally shit anyway, so.
171
00:14:28,340 --> 00:14:29,640
God, I'm so happy to hear that.
172
00:14:29,980 --> 00:14:32,620
I mean, not that your life is shit, but
that you're in.
173
00:14:33,220 --> 00:14:36,620
Besides, as soon as Doug says yes, we'll
probably need you to finance the whole
174
00:14:36,620 --> 00:14:37,620
thing. What?
175
00:14:38,560 --> 00:14:39,560
Doug?
176
00:14:43,720 --> 00:14:45,180
Griff, I'm sorry.
177
00:14:46,080 --> 00:14:50,000
I got responsibilities. Got Mailey,
Charlie, my job.
178
00:14:50,200 --> 00:14:51,099
I know.
179
00:14:51,100 --> 00:14:52,560
Making a wedding gift.
180
00:14:52,800 --> 00:14:53,860
No, Grant.
181
00:14:54,780 --> 00:14:56,000
It's a good life, you know.
182
00:14:56,780 --> 00:14:58,300
The B, B plus life.
183
00:14:59,680 --> 00:15:01,480
B, B plus life.
184
00:15:02,920 --> 00:15:03,920
It's a good life.
185
00:15:05,640 --> 00:15:08,960
Do you remember when we were kids and we
would stay up till four in the morning
186
00:15:08,960 --> 00:15:10,980
hanging around the basement watching
horror movies?
187
00:15:12,200 --> 00:15:13,700
Scaring the shit out of ourselves.
188
00:15:13,960 --> 00:15:16,200
Texas Chainsaw on, like, repeat.
189
00:15:16,460 --> 00:15:17,860
Now we have the chance to make one
ourselves.
190
00:15:19,460 --> 00:15:22,240
Dude, that's what we dreamed about ever
since we were little kids.
191
00:15:24,020 --> 00:15:25,020
I hear you.
192
00:15:26,380 --> 00:15:28,200
But we're not kids anymore, Griff.
193
00:15:28,980 --> 00:15:29,980
I'm sorry.
194
00:15:32,800 --> 00:15:33,800
Yeah.
195
00:15:54,120 --> 00:15:56,200
Charlie, why don't you go check on those
cookies?
196
00:15:56,820 --> 00:16:00,900
Okay, but I'm pausing it, so... Don't
touch it.
197
00:16:02,080 --> 00:16:04,180
Gonna need some ice cold milks with
that.
198
00:16:04,380 --> 00:16:05,380
You got it.
199
00:16:06,500 --> 00:16:07,500
What are you doing?
200
00:16:07,680 --> 00:16:09,480
What? Just go make the movie.
201
00:16:09,760 --> 00:16:14,760
Bailey. Come on. Every time you watch
this thing, you light up. Like, I
202
00:16:14,760 --> 00:16:16,340
seen you light up in a long time.
203
00:16:16,700 --> 00:16:19,940
So what? I'm supposed to chase some
Hollywood fantasy I had as a kid?
204
00:16:20,380 --> 00:16:24,170
Waste a bunch of money and time, and for
what? In the end... What's it gonna
205
00:16:24,170 --> 00:16:25,170
change?
206
00:16:27,050 --> 00:16:28,050
Okay.
207
00:16:29,510 --> 00:16:30,510
Okay.
208
00:16:31,250 --> 00:16:32,250
Okay.
209
00:16:39,530 --> 00:16:44,190
We hope you come to celebrate as we
become the handsome!
210
00:16:46,050 --> 00:16:47,570
Holy shit.
211
00:17:19,440 --> 00:17:25,560
lives to be like over what are you
talking about the anaconda thing
212
00:17:25,560 --> 00:17:30,840
you were serious right yes very then
let's do it
213
00:17:30,840 --> 00:17:36,220
let's reboot anaconda yeah yeah
214
00:18:00,800 --> 00:18:06,600
I figured we need three weeks of
shooting. Some VFX, some SFX, a
215
00:18:06,600 --> 00:18:11,120
riverboat captain, travel to and from a
jungle, and a gigantic real snake.
216
00:18:11,480 --> 00:18:12,480
Rental.
217
00:18:12,560 --> 00:18:15,880
Rental. Copy. All in. Two, two and a
half million dollars.
218
00:18:16,520 --> 00:18:17,580
That sounds right.
219
00:18:17,840 --> 00:18:23,320
We've approved a loan for you for up to
$9 ,400.
220
00:18:24,260 --> 00:18:28,060
Yep. I've revised the budget down to...
221
00:18:28,380 --> 00:18:32,480
43 ,000 all in. That sounds more right.
Now, the film does have to be scary,
222
00:18:32,600 --> 00:18:36,920
right? Terrifying. But it can't just be
about a giant snake killing people.
223
00:18:37,280 --> 00:18:40,140
Exactly. It has to be about something,
right?
224
00:18:40,420 --> 00:18:41,420
Right.
225
00:18:41,980 --> 00:18:44,320
I mean, themes.
226
00:18:46,200 --> 00:18:50,580
Come on. Like, what about revenge? In
terms of themes, that's like one of the
227
00:18:50,580 --> 00:18:51,339
top ones.
228
00:18:51,340 --> 00:18:53,140
Oh, my God. I got a good one. Hit me.
229
00:18:54,200 --> 00:18:55,200
Intergenerational trauma.
230
00:18:55,920 --> 00:18:58,980
I love intergenerational trauma. Who
doesn't love intergenerational trauma?
231
00:18:59,240 --> 00:19:00,560
After that, we're on to something.
232
00:19:07,040 --> 00:19:10,480
This is a masterpiece.
233
00:19:11,160 --> 00:19:12,340
You're a goddamn genius.
234
00:19:12,600 --> 00:19:15,780
I love it. Don't change a word. Not a
word. You killed it. It's scary. It's
235
00:19:15,780 --> 00:19:19,660
emotional. It's funny when it needs to
be. Dude, thank you. Hey, Doug.
236
00:19:21,800 --> 00:19:24,060
I know that we had our little dust up.
237
00:19:25,930 --> 00:19:29,830
But I need to shoot this film, man.
Stuffed up?
238
00:19:30,790 --> 00:19:36,370
Yeah. He fired me from the wedding video
stuff because I got a little wasted.
239
00:19:36,930 --> 00:19:38,070
Knocked over the wedding cake.
240
00:19:39,370 --> 00:19:40,650
But I'm dealing with it.
241
00:19:40,990 --> 00:19:42,630
Like getting sober? Yes.
242
00:19:43,370 --> 00:19:45,530
Well, I mean, Buffalo sober.
243
00:19:45,890 --> 00:19:46,789
Buffalo sober?
244
00:19:46,790 --> 00:19:47,970
Mm -hmm. Just beer and wine.
245
00:19:49,370 --> 00:19:53,350
And then some of the lighter liquors.
But definitely not all of them.
246
00:19:54,670 --> 00:19:55,670
I'm going to go to you.
247
00:19:57,090 --> 00:19:58,090
Doug?
248
00:20:00,190 --> 00:20:04,290
If I'm being honest, I enabled you a
little bit. Of course you get a second
249
00:20:04,290 --> 00:20:05,310
chance. Let's do this.
250
00:20:06,430 --> 00:20:07,530
Nice. Thank you, man.
251
00:20:08,910 --> 00:20:09,910
Car's here.
252
00:20:10,110 --> 00:20:14,490
And you have the meth liquid, right? You
only take that once a week. Hey, Dad.
253
00:20:15,110 --> 00:20:16,110
I forgot.
254
00:20:16,510 --> 00:20:17,349
I'm talking to you.
255
00:20:17,350 --> 00:20:20,270
I got you this.
256
00:20:20,770 --> 00:20:21,770
What?
257
00:20:22,190 --> 00:20:23,550
I know. Pretty thick.
258
00:20:24,140 --> 00:20:26,420
The world's greatest Doug.
259
00:20:26,740 --> 00:20:28,140
I thought it should say dad.
260
00:20:28,420 --> 00:20:29,460
Whatever, man, that's funny.
261
00:20:29,760 --> 00:20:31,340
I love it. It's much better.
262
00:21:20,430 --> 00:21:22,230
I was reading about anacondas on a
plane.
263
00:21:22,450 --> 00:21:27,670
Basically, they wait in the water a day,
stalking their prey, never moving, just
264
00:21:27,670 --> 00:21:32,410
waiting. And then when a prey comes,
snatch and grab it. A thousand pounds of
265
00:21:32,410 --> 00:21:34,070
pressure. You think you're going to get
away? You're not.
266
00:21:34,390 --> 00:21:35,390
Crushing you.
267
00:21:35,810 --> 00:21:36,950
Oxygen leaving your lungs.
268
00:21:38,790 --> 00:21:40,310
Oh, God, it's terrible.
269
00:21:40,570 --> 00:21:41,630
It's like in the movie Anaconda.
270
00:21:41,970 --> 00:21:42,970
Yeah, exactly.
271
00:21:43,110 --> 00:21:44,009
It's real.
272
00:21:44,010 --> 00:21:45,010
Yeah, it's all real.
273
00:21:47,130 --> 00:21:48,130
It's very real.
274
00:21:50,600 --> 00:21:52,820
There's a story about this woman.
275
00:21:53,340 --> 00:21:54,480
God bless her.
276
00:21:54,960 --> 00:21:58,080
The snake wraps around her so tight.
277
00:21:59,500 --> 00:22:04,560
The eyeballs just... No way!
278
00:22:04,820 --> 00:22:06,960
It was my grandmother, Silvana.
279
00:22:07,280 --> 00:22:09,840
Shit. Horrible grandmother.
280
00:22:10,240 --> 00:22:12,500
I'm sorry,
281
00:22:13,580 --> 00:22:14,459
who are you?
282
00:22:14,460 --> 00:22:16,160
Oh, I'm sorry. Carlos Santiago.
283
00:22:16,520 --> 00:22:17,640
Yeah, you can call me Santiago.
284
00:22:18,400 --> 00:22:19,840
Hey, hey, hey. Hey, it's Kenny.
285
00:22:20,240 --> 00:22:21,520
Kenny's on the phone. Kenny, yeah.
286
00:22:21,840 --> 00:22:22,840
Hey, hi.
287
00:22:23,040 --> 00:22:24,720
Yeah, this is our snake handler.
288
00:22:25,060 --> 00:22:28,720
Oh, thank God. You're supposed to be in
the back. No. You're supposed to be in.
289
00:22:28,800 --> 00:22:29,679
We have a joker here.
290
00:22:29,680 --> 00:22:31,220
No, I'm in the back.
291
00:22:31,440 --> 00:22:33,080
Yeah. Uh -huh. Good.
292
00:22:33,440 --> 00:22:35,160
So, welcome to Brazil.
293
00:22:36,760 --> 00:22:37,760
Nice to meet you, Nate.
294
00:23:14,890 --> 00:23:20,070
His food supply is destroyed by gold
miners who put mercury in the river.
295
00:23:20,070 --> 00:23:22,390
miners? Gold mining poisons our land.
296
00:23:23,130 --> 00:23:25,290
Their greed almost killed my snake.
297
00:23:26,010 --> 00:23:32,970
Oh. But I had him. I never think back to
life. In many ways, he did
298
00:23:32,970 --> 00:23:33,970
the same for me.
299
00:23:34,110 --> 00:23:37,610
Right. The tale is old as time, saved by
faith.
300
00:23:40,830 --> 00:23:41,830
What's her name?
301
00:23:42,350 --> 00:23:45,650
Was it, uh, Grip? Okay, Grip. It's not
only his name.
302
00:23:46,270 --> 00:23:48,510
My tiny giant, my friend.
303
00:23:49,290 --> 00:23:53,150
One of the most important creatures of
the arithmetological world.
304
00:23:53,910 --> 00:23:58,270
No, of course, I, uh, sure. I didn't, I
wasn't trying to... I, yes.
305
00:23:58,550 --> 00:24:01,230
Okay. Let me introduce you.
306
00:24:04,130 --> 00:24:05,950
Oh. Hey, Thor.
307
00:24:06,150 --> 00:24:09,030
Hey, Thor. Oh, my goodness.
308
00:24:09,550 --> 00:24:10,550
Hey, Thor.
309
00:24:12,560 --> 00:24:17,400
Oh, hell yes! This thing is nuts!
310
00:24:17,700 --> 00:24:20,500
There are rumors of condoms even bigger.
311
00:24:20,860 --> 00:24:23,520
Maybe four or five times its size.
312
00:24:24,960 --> 00:24:29,320
Go ahead, Kenny, from the phone. Um, is
it true that they regurgitate their
313
00:24:29,320 --> 00:24:30,580
prey? Sometimes.
314
00:24:31,260 --> 00:24:36,500
I mean, if you're lucky, you die right
away because of suffocation.
315
00:24:36,920 --> 00:24:40,900
But only the unlucky ones survive.
316
00:24:41,530 --> 00:24:42,530
Unlucky?
317
00:24:43,790 --> 00:24:50,550
Yeah, because then you might actually be
conscious when the snake comes back
318
00:24:50,550 --> 00:24:52,370
to finish you off.
319
00:24:52,750 --> 00:24:54,110
Gotcha. Ooh.
320
00:24:54,610 --> 00:24:55,690
Better to die.
321
00:25:33,580 --> 00:25:35,000
Hey, may I ask you a question?
322
00:25:36,440 --> 00:25:37,440
Hey, guy.
323
00:25:38,560 --> 00:25:40,900
He's kind of batshit crazy.
324
00:25:41,300 --> 00:25:43,240
I mean, he's been friends with Snake.
325
00:25:43,560 --> 00:25:44,820
Of course, he's a little quirky.
326
00:25:45,040 --> 00:25:46,060
But I like him.
327
00:25:46,260 --> 00:25:47,260
Really? Yeah.
328
00:25:47,380 --> 00:25:51,740
Then again, I used up all my vacation
days to come make it self -financed,
329
00:25:51,780 --> 00:25:55,700
making me with you three, so... Your
judgment's really off. My judgment is
330
00:25:55,920 --> 00:26:00,460
Anybody talk to the captain? It's not a
shoot. I'll reach out again.
331
00:26:00,860 --> 00:26:01,860
Hi,
332
00:26:02,880 --> 00:26:06,270
guys. My name is Anna. I believe you
spoke to my father on the phone.
333
00:26:06,650 --> 00:26:08,350
Bruno? That's your dad?
334
00:26:08,910 --> 00:26:11,330
Yeah, he sent his apologies, but he's at
the outro.
335
00:26:11,630 --> 00:26:13,150
Oh. Ah, I'm sorry.
336
00:26:13,590 --> 00:26:16,670
Unfortunately, you'll have to make other
accommodations because I need to take
337
00:26:16,670 --> 00:26:20,890
this boat upriver for a week in service.
But I can assure you a full refund. No,
338
00:26:20,910 --> 00:26:21,629
wait, wait.
339
00:26:21,630 --> 00:26:26,010
Everything else is booked. Yeah. And
we're going to shoot a movie. It's a
340
00:26:26,010 --> 00:26:29,880
reboot. Maniconda? Technically, it's
more of a reimagining, but it's actually
341
00:26:29,880 --> 00:26:32,080
more of a spiritual update. Good for
you.
342
00:26:32,420 --> 00:26:35,260
There's got to be a way, right? We can
crew the boat. There's nothing I can do.
343
00:26:35,320 --> 00:26:38,600
We have dreamed of making this film
together our entire lives.
344
00:26:39,020 --> 00:26:41,060
Please. I am begging you.
345
00:26:41,280 --> 00:26:43,480
Please. Help us find another way.
346
00:26:43,880 --> 00:26:45,780
Let's do this. We'll do fast. Okay.
Check.
347
00:27:23,720 --> 00:27:24,720
Where did you find this boat?
348
00:27:26,500 --> 00:27:27,500
Yes!
349
00:27:54,280 --> 00:28:00,040
day tomorrow if you remember we had a
tradition on all our films the night
350
00:28:00,040 --> 00:28:05,080
before we started shooting we would say
a prayer to the movie god asking them to
351
00:28:05,080 --> 00:28:10,980
basically not screw us over and for the
first time ever may they listen come on
352
00:28:10,980 --> 00:28:11,980
to the movie god
353
00:28:29,700 --> 00:28:31,720
Anaconda 350, take one. Bye.
354
00:28:32,620 --> 00:28:33,620
Fellas!
355
00:28:34,880 --> 00:28:36,680
What the hell are you still doing here?
356
00:28:36,900 --> 00:28:40,720
I've come to take you home. It's time
you stopped chasing this mythical snake.
357
00:28:41,600 --> 00:28:43,840
And what if I'm not prone to giving up?
358
00:28:44,360 --> 00:28:45,760
I didn't see you filming there.
359
00:28:46,400 --> 00:28:49,720
What are we doing, APK? Background DVD
bonus stuff.
360
00:28:49,960 --> 00:28:55,040
The Anaconda is the story of an intrepid
biologist, played by Claire, who hires
361
00:28:55,040 --> 00:28:56,720
an unhinged...
362
00:28:56,940 --> 00:29:02,340
Nick Tracker, played by Grip, to hunt
down and kill a giant mythical conda
363
00:29:02,340 --> 00:29:03,580
ate her entire family.
364
00:29:03,820 --> 00:29:08,600
And on a deeper level, it's about
chasing your dream.
365
00:29:13,820 --> 00:29:15,540
What's it like shooting with Doug again?
366
00:29:16,440 --> 00:29:20,080
Our best friend. We've worked together
our whole lives, and I went out to L
367
00:29:20,080 --> 00:29:22,540
and he was going to come out, and we
were going to be a partnership, and he
368
00:29:22,540 --> 00:29:27,020
didn't do it. Griff and I planned to
work together in L .A., but, you know,
369
00:29:27,020 --> 00:29:29,820
intervened. But it doesn't matter,
because now we're together, and now
370
00:29:29,820 --> 00:29:32,580
back. We're making this, and it's as it
should be.
371
00:29:32,800 --> 00:29:33,900
I am the instant.
372
00:29:34,960 --> 00:29:37,280
They are going to move slow and steady.
373
00:29:37,920 --> 00:29:39,020
Sometimes it goes fast.
374
00:29:39,360 --> 00:29:41,360
Make P .O .B. R .V. Take one.
375
00:29:43,210 --> 00:29:44,210
No, it's not working.
376
00:29:44,330 --> 00:29:46,630
Make the OD the right way, day two.
377
00:29:47,590 --> 00:29:52,470
Sometimes he goes from above in the
trees, sometimes from below in the
378
00:29:52,690 --> 00:29:56,710
The toothpick, it unlocked a couple of
aspects of his character for me.
379
00:29:56,770 --> 00:29:57,770
Something there.
380
00:30:00,890 --> 00:30:03,950
Ah, I'll be nervous about doing a love
story with Greg.
381
00:30:04,150 --> 00:30:05,250
You guys used to date.
382
00:30:05,630 --> 00:30:06,970
That was a long time ago.
383
00:30:07,190 --> 00:30:09,570
A little bit of chaos was part of the
ingredient.
384
00:30:18,480 --> 00:30:21,020
Look at each other. This might be the
last time you look at each other.
385
00:30:21,220 --> 00:30:24,900
I think you'd be a little nicer to the
guy who's out here to save your life.
386
00:30:25,080 --> 00:30:26,080
You're an asshole.
387
00:30:28,200 --> 00:30:31,160
And a TNT.
388
00:30:35,260 --> 00:30:36,260
And cut.
389
00:30:36,900 --> 00:30:37,900
Great stuff, guys.
390
00:30:38,160 --> 00:30:40,880
We got it. Should we go one more time?
391
00:30:41,420 --> 00:30:42,420
Want to try it again?
392
00:30:42,720 --> 00:30:43,880
No, I'm good. You're good.
393
00:30:44,120 --> 00:30:45,120
Let's go.
394
00:30:55,200 --> 00:30:59,120
between you two and... Yeah? Like we
were right back in high school.
395
00:31:00,000 --> 00:31:01,040
Wouldn't you have looked out better?
396
00:31:01,540 --> 00:31:02,720
Well, that's because of your notes.
397
00:31:02,980 --> 00:31:06,440
About taking the beat right before you
did it. Yeah, yeah, it made the scene.
398
00:31:07,220 --> 00:31:13,160
I'll tell you, I never felt like this on
SWAT. I mean, granted, I was only in a
399
00:31:13,160 --> 00:31:15,600
couple of episodes, but it was never
collaborative. It was never fun.
400
00:31:15,800 --> 00:31:17,680
Not like this.
401
00:31:18,960 --> 00:31:20,580
We were back on quad.
402
00:31:43,760 --> 00:31:49,440
At the midway point, instead of talking
the bad guy out of it, what if
403
00:31:49,440 --> 00:31:54,080
Claire's character headbutts him?
404
00:31:54,620 --> 00:31:56,500
Sorry, headbutts him?
405
00:31:57,360 --> 00:32:03,680
Headbutts him. Or, or, we both do.
Double headbutts.
406
00:32:04,120 --> 00:32:06,080
Come on. Kind of revolutionary.
407
00:32:06,320 --> 00:32:07,320
That's super revolutionary.
408
00:32:07,720 --> 00:32:09,680
Why is that super revolutionary?
409
00:32:10,160 --> 00:32:11,720
It's never been done.
410
00:32:12,730 --> 00:32:15,310
This is a beautiful scene with real
steak, Doug.
411
00:32:15,630 --> 00:32:16,830
Feel free to weigh in here.
412
00:32:17,130 --> 00:32:20,950
No, I hear you. I do. And as always, I
trust your instincts on this.
413
00:32:22,810 --> 00:32:27,190
But a double headbutt is pretty
revolutionary. Right? It is. It's very
414
00:32:27,190 --> 00:32:28,190
revolutionary. Yeah.
415
00:32:28,430 --> 00:32:32,610
There's no denying it. None. Oh, come
on. Claire, is the problem you just
416
00:32:32,610 --> 00:32:36,290
know how to headbutt? Why would I not
know how to headbutt? We're not born
417
00:32:36,290 --> 00:32:38,490
these skills. We learn them along the
way. Let me show you.
418
00:32:38,710 --> 00:32:39,710
Tight core.
419
00:32:39,770 --> 00:32:41,130
Breathe in. Hold that breath.
420
00:32:42,560 --> 00:32:43,920
And you can vocalize.
421
00:32:44,760 --> 00:32:49,240
Another kind of headbutt is more
unleashed. Just full on.
422
00:32:50,140 --> 00:32:54,120
You got the arms in there. That's good.
Send that foot into the goal.
423
00:32:54,360 --> 00:32:55,720
You know.
424
00:32:58,540 --> 00:33:02,860
I would
425
00:33:02,860 --> 00:33:09,400
go for the bridge of the nose. Just
426
00:33:09,400 --> 00:33:10,400
crack it.
427
00:33:12,900 --> 00:33:13,839
That's it.
428
00:33:13,840 --> 00:33:14,840
That's it.
429
00:34:18,320 --> 00:34:20,300
I'm sorry, but how could this happen,
huh?
430
00:34:20,880 --> 00:34:22,600
Tenny, I thought you said this guy was a
pro.
431
00:34:22,860 --> 00:34:25,920
That's what he said, but he hasn't
provided us with a certificate.
432
00:34:26,239 --> 00:34:31,060
You fixed the crate, right? It's taken
care of? My thing, my job, under
433
00:34:31,320 --> 00:34:32,320
All good.
434
00:34:33,040 --> 00:34:37,060
My H .R., he's a beautiful, intelligent,
smart, sexy creature.
435
00:34:37,880 --> 00:34:40,040
He does exactly what I command.
436
00:34:40,860 --> 00:34:44,920
And I would never let anything happen to
you.
437
00:34:45,400 --> 00:34:51,100
or the crazy one or her or her or the
actor here so have a good night
438
00:34:51,100 --> 00:34:58,040
may the sound of the forest be the music
of her dreams
439
00:35:19,370 --> 00:35:20,370
Actors on your mark.
440
00:35:21,250 --> 00:35:22,650
Santiago, is Hytor ready?
441
00:35:22,930 --> 00:35:26,730
Yes. Hytor's always ready. Hytor's
ready. And action.
442
00:35:32,010 --> 00:35:33,010
Cut, please.
443
00:35:34,270 --> 00:35:35,310
Um, cut?
444
00:35:35,570 --> 00:35:36,890
Yeah. All right, cut.
445
00:35:37,510 --> 00:35:40,950
Kenny, do you mind if I... Santiago,
take five. Hytor, five.
446
00:35:41,890 --> 00:35:43,090
Hey, hey. Wow.
447
00:35:43,310 --> 00:35:46,930
It's huge when you see an up -closing
person like that.
448
00:35:47,210 --> 00:35:48,270
Majestic creature.
449
00:35:48,780 --> 00:35:55,060
But I throw myself in front of the snake
to kind of protect Claire's character.
450
00:35:55,240 --> 00:35:56,240
Right? Correct.
451
00:35:56,480 --> 00:36:00,020
Is there any value in not doing that?
452
00:36:00,540 --> 00:36:01,540
What? No.
453
00:36:01,780 --> 00:36:04,580
No, no. He sacrifices himself for her.
454
00:36:04,820 --> 00:36:07,060
It caps his arc. It's so important.
455
00:36:07,360 --> 00:36:09,920
Right. And also, dude, it's totally
safe.
456
00:36:10,300 --> 00:36:11,300
Yeah.
457
00:36:19,440 --> 00:36:20,238
All right, let's do this.
458
00:36:20,240 --> 00:36:21,600
All right, take it from the top.
459
00:36:23,400 --> 00:36:24,400
Back to one.
460
00:36:25,780 --> 00:36:27,060
Santiago, high chord.
461
00:36:28,460 --> 00:36:29,460
Action!
462
00:36:29,820 --> 00:36:30,820
Go!
463
00:36:31,720 --> 00:36:32,840
I'm not leaving!
464
00:36:33,220 --> 00:36:35,880
Not without you, Jared. Stop me!
465
00:36:36,360 --> 00:36:39,580
The world is depending on you. I'm
depending on you!
466
00:36:40,000 --> 00:36:42,760
God damn it, I love you, Jared! Bad oil!
467
00:36:45,900 --> 00:36:48,320
Put your face right up next to the
snake.
468
00:36:48,620 --> 00:36:50,960
I don't like it. I don't want to do it
anymore. Get closer.
469
00:36:52,180 --> 00:36:53,180
He's friendly.
470
00:36:53,280 --> 00:36:54,380
You've got to do.
471
00:36:54,600 --> 00:36:56,120
No, I don't quite have it.
472
00:36:56,360 --> 00:37:03,000
This is gold. Just give me one more
second. One inch closer to your face.
473
00:37:03,240 --> 00:37:04,680
Get it right up in there.
474
00:37:05,080 --> 00:37:06,080
You're a hero.
475
00:37:37,260 --> 00:37:39,100
Now you think this is strange.
476
00:37:40,700 --> 00:37:44,220
A grown man get emotional over some dead
neck.
477
00:37:44,900 --> 00:37:47,460
But I love him.
478
00:37:48,300 --> 00:37:49,820
And he loved me back.
479
00:37:50,060 --> 00:37:51,480
Whatever way he could.
480
00:37:53,000 --> 00:37:55,360
Oh, God.
481
00:37:56,240 --> 00:37:57,240
No.
482
00:37:58,640 --> 00:38:00,060
Why is Kenny crying?
483
00:38:02,780 --> 00:38:06,680
No. Hey, I don't want you here. Not for
this.
484
00:38:07,070 --> 00:38:08,070
He tried to murder me.
485
00:38:08,490 --> 00:38:09,490
Griff? What?
486
00:38:09,670 --> 00:38:12,310
Let the man grieve. You murdered my
friend!
487
00:38:12,530 --> 00:38:13,630
Just get out of my face!
488
00:38:13,890 --> 00:38:15,230
Where am I supposed to go? Griff!
489
00:38:15,450 --> 00:38:16,710
Go! Just move!
490
00:38:42,510 --> 00:38:47,310
my friend welcome
491
00:38:47,310 --> 00:38:54,170
here my dear friend
492
00:39:12,490 --> 00:39:13,490
What are you doing there?
493
00:39:14,730 --> 00:39:18,010
I'm making a funeral of a snake, a snake
shot, I think.
494
00:39:18,550 --> 00:39:20,550
What is a funeral of a snake?
495
00:39:47,500 --> 00:39:48,500
You have told me something.
496
00:40:29,130 --> 00:40:32,890
No. Not you. No. I know. I'm sorry. I
don't mean... I'm not trying to disturb
497
00:40:32,890 --> 00:40:35,290
you. I just wanted... Just leave me
alone. I'm sorry for your loss.
498
00:40:36,050 --> 00:40:38,910
I know you don't believe me, but it's
true. I really am.
499
00:40:39,350 --> 00:40:42,910
A friend of mine died once, too, and it
hurt.
500
00:40:45,010 --> 00:40:46,010
Was it a snake?
501
00:40:46,790 --> 00:40:47,790
Was it a snake?
502
00:40:49,450 --> 00:40:50,450
No.
503
00:40:50,630 --> 00:40:54,170
It was just a human person.
504
00:40:54,710 --> 00:40:55,710
Oh.
505
00:40:56,030 --> 00:40:57,030
That's a sad one.
506
00:40:58,730 --> 00:41:01,530
Totally. Anyway, I just wanted to say
I'm sorry.
507
00:41:02,890 --> 00:41:03,890
Beer?
508
00:41:04,710 --> 00:41:08,570
Well, how much beer? But, you know, I'll
just mix it up.
509
00:41:08,950 --> 00:41:10,730
A few commercials, TV.
510
00:41:11,550 --> 00:41:13,330
A few episodes of SWAT.
511
00:41:13,790 --> 00:41:15,030
Oh, SWAT?
512
00:41:15,250 --> 00:41:16,610
Yeah. Oh, I like that one.
513
00:41:16,990 --> 00:41:20,310
I even had the last line.
514
00:41:20,530 --> 00:41:24,650
The last line of season three. So what
happened?
515
00:41:24,950 --> 00:41:28,970
The producers decided that... They
didn't really need that character, so
516
00:41:28,970 --> 00:41:29,970
got rid of me.
517
00:41:30,410 --> 00:41:33,790
I mean, it's only been going about eight
or nine more seasons.
518
00:41:35,410 --> 00:41:36,590
They don't deserve you.
519
00:41:37,350 --> 00:41:38,390
Yeah, you're a star.
520
00:41:41,030 --> 00:41:42,090
Thank you. Yeah.
521
00:41:42,470 --> 00:41:43,550
You're thinking about this?
522
00:41:44,030 --> 00:41:48,990
I mean, an industrial... You know what
movie I like? What? The Lajunov Badger
523
00:41:48,990 --> 00:41:49,990
Event.
524
00:41:50,770 --> 00:41:53,770
You should do a movie like that. Oh,
man, I wish.
525
00:41:54,050 --> 00:41:55,050
Yeah.
526
00:41:56,780 --> 00:41:57,638
I like you.
527
00:41:57,640 --> 00:41:58,780
I like you, too.
528
00:41:59,000 --> 00:42:03,300
You know what? What? I'll get a news
make for your movie now.
529
00:42:03,680 --> 00:42:04,680
Really? Yeah.
530
00:42:04,800 --> 00:42:06,540
Oh, my God. Thank you so much.
531
00:42:07,020 --> 00:42:08,920
You come with me, of course.
532
00:42:10,420 --> 00:42:11,420
What?
533
00:42:13,700 --> 00:42:14,720
Should we be in here?
534
00:42:14,980 --> 00:42:16,100
Maybe we should head back.
535
00:42:22,300 --> 00:42:23,300
Oh, my God.
536
00:42:23,840 --> 00:42:24,840
Oh, my God.
537
00:42:29,360 --> 00:42:32,040
There's snakes around here. I can feel
it.
538
00:42:33,160 --> 00:42:34,540
What does it feel like?
539
00:42:35,220 --> 00:42:40,380
I don't know. It's just very snakey.
What? It's snakey?
540
00:42:42,560 --> 00:42:43,560
Ah.
541
00:42:47,540 --> 00:42:51,040
They hear from vibrations on the ground.
542
00:42:53,260 --> 00:42:58,160
Every step we take, it's only them
closer.
543
00:43:00,110 --> 00:43:06,970
And when the jungle goes quiet, that's
when you
544
00:43:06,970 --> 00:43:07,970
know they're clones.
545
00:43:15,990 --> 00:43:16,990
Yeah.
546
00:43:25,030 --> 00:43:26,670
And then we should go back to the boat.
547
00:43:27,990 --> 00:43:30,110
Think it'd be a good idea to go back to
the boat. Go back to the boat.
548
00:43:32,370 --> 00:43:33,370
Santiago!
549
00:43:34,370 --> 00:43:35,370
Santiago!
550
00:43:36,630 --> 00:43:37,630
Santiago!
551
00:43:42,050 --> 00:43:43,050
Nope.
552
00:44:26,030 --> 00:44:27,810
Hey, Pacquiao, I don't think you've come
back.
553
00:44:28,130 --> 00:44:33,570
Back? From what? We went out to go get a
new snake. You went to find a snake in
554
00:44:33,570 --> 00:44:36,430
the middle of the night? Yeah, but we
need one for the movie. We were dark. We
555
00:44:36,430 --> 00:44:40,150
got separated. It was crazy out there.
Grif, grif, grif. What? You went out in
556
00:44:40,150 --> 00:44:43,170
the middle of the night to find a juicy
snake in the jungle? You know what
557
00:44:43,170 --> 00:44:44,170
that's called?
558
00:44:45,690 --> 00:44:46,690
Producing.
559
00:44:47,290 --> 00:44:50,990
Really? I guarantee he will be back with
a giant snake.
560
00:44:51,210 --> 00:44:53,750
And you and I are making movies.
561
00:44:54,420 --> 00:44:56,200
You're right. That guy doesn't prowl.
562
00:44:56,400 --> 00:44:59,160
He'll be fine. If he's not back soon,
we'll go look for him.
563
00:45:29,160 --> 00:45:31,000
It's been over an hour. I have to go
find him.
564
00:45:31,500 --> 00:45:32,620
Well, you're not going alone.
565
00:45:32,820 --> 00:45:34,740
Yeah, we're definitely coming with you.
It's safer that way.
566
00:45:35,200 --> 00:45:36,940
Have you guys tried this thing?
567
00:45:37,880 --> 00:45:42,940
It is like a warm bowl of soup, but in
chair form.
568
00:45:43,920 --> 00:45:44,920
Yeah, man.
569
00:45:45,040 --> 00:45:47,580
Chairs. And I told you, man.
570
00:45:48,720 --> 00:45:50,860
They literally have arms, right?
571
00:45:53,040 --> 00:45:54,040
Oh, wow.
572
00:45:54,900 --> 00:45:56,660
Like when your parents are gone?
573
00:45:59,880 --> 00:46:01,560
We still have tears, you know?
574
00:46:03,680 --> 00:46:05,680
The hell are you talking about?
575
00:46:05,960 --> 00:46:07,400
Let's go find Santiago.
576
00:46:07,860 --> 00:46:10,760
Let's get a snake for our snake movie.
Yeah, Santiago!
577
00:46:11,100 --> 00:46:12,100
Let's go!
578
00:46:21,680 --> 00:46:22,820
direction are we headed in?
579
00:46:23,500 --> 00:46:26,380
Um, like that way.
580
00:46:27,000 --> 00:46:32,400
Wait, Kenny, are you high right now?
Yeah, but I'm good. I already peaked.
581
00:46:32,400 --> 00:46:34,480
Christ, Kenny, we're completely lost.
582
00:46:37,200 --> 00:46:39,280
Wait, you guys, this way.
583
00:46:40,120 --> 00:46:41,960
It looks like an old camper van.
584
00:47:22,720 --> 00:47:25,220
Wow. Looks totally abandoned.
585
00:47:25,760 --> 00:47:27,080
Anybody home?
586
00:47:33,390 --> 00:47:34,630
Maybe some food in the home here.
587
00:47:35,010 --> 00:47:36,210
Oh, we could stay here.
588
00:47:36,610 --> 00:47:37,610
Oh,
589
00:47:41,310 --> 00:47:45,750
man, you've got a mess in here.
590
00:48:20,910 --> 00:48:22,750
Dang. That's where that guy went.
591
00:48:22,990 --> 00:48:24,390
Oh, my God. What is out there?
592
00:48:35,850 --> 00:48:37,030
We got to go now.
593
00:48:38,530 --> 00:48:41,770
Let's go. Let's go. We can't let him
crush the van. Crush the van?
594
00:48:42,170 --> 00:48:43,370
It's not with me. Watch.
595
00:48:43,750 --> 00:48:46,090
It's a camper van. Probably.
596
00:48:46,410 --> 00:48:47,470
It's got a smidgen.
597
00:48:47,880 --> 00:48:51,160
The charged batteries have really
probably popped off. It's underneath the
598
00:48:51,220 --> 00:48:56,020
Hey, can you fix it? Usually I can fix
it, yes, but I'm having some visual
599
00:48:56,020 --> 00:49:01,000
problems because of the... You did it to
me again. You did it on the wedding
600
00:49:01,000 --> 00:49:03,240
video and then you wasted off your ass.
601
00:49:03,500 --> 00:49:04,499
I'm dead.
602
00:49:04,500 --> 00:49:05,800
I'm really sorry, boss.
603
00:49:06,060 --> 00:49:07,540
Oh, buffalo sober.
604
00:49:07,940 --> 00:49:09,180
You're buffalo sober.
605
00:49:09,640 --> 00:49:10,680
Do you have any more?
606
00:49:10,920 --> 00:49:14,680
Griff, please, can you fix it? I think
I'm better suited to be your wheel man.
607
00:49:14,760 --> 00:49:17,520
Talking about I've always been a better
driver than you. Are you going to see?
608
00:49:17,870 --> 00:49:21,930
driver i passed the driver's test on my
first drive you took three times yeah
609
00:49:21,930 --> 00:49:26,370
that's because of yield i didn't know
now i know what that is oh my god we're
610
00:49:26,370 --> 00:49:27,370
gonna die
611
00:51:14,710 --> 00:51:15,710
Hey,
612
00:51:18,010 --> 00:51:21,390
maybe we can ask these guys for help. We
have to stop.
613
00:51:21,590 --> 00:51:25,590
Do not stop the car. Anna, what is going
on? They're illegal gold miners who
614
00:51:25,590 --> 00:51:26,950
patrol the jungles around here.
615
00:51:27,230 --> 00:51:28,270
These guys are dangerous.
616
00:51:28,590 --> 00:51:31,070
They'll kill anyone processing to their
territory.
617
00:51:38,160 --> 00:51:39,380
Can't you drive any faster?
618
00:51:42,060 --> 00:51:44,120
Whoa, whoa, Anna, what are you doing?
619
00:52:26,920 --> 00:52:27,920
Where is she?
620
00:52:28,240 --> 00:52:29,720
Oh, my God. Where is she?
621
00:52:33,020 --> 00:52:34,660
Who? Who do you mean?
622
00:52:34,860 --> 00:52:38,600
I know there's someone else here. So,
where is she?
623
00:52:44,120 --> 00:52:45,120
Let's go. Come on.
624
00:52:45,460 --> 00:52:46,480
We gotta go. Fast.
625
00:52:48,880 --> 00:52:52,880
Look, I can get you guys out of here.
All we need to do is keep heading north.
626
00:52:53,710 --> 00:52:56,470
There's a small airport about a day and
a half from here.
627
00:52:56,950 --> 00:52:58,030
You can get us home?
628
00:52:58,570 --> 00:53:01,390
Yeah. Get us home. I think we got to
call it.
629
00:53:02,070 --> 00:53:04,490
Man, we've got such good stuff and we're
so close.
630
00:53:05,430 --> 00:53:06,430
Really?
631
00:53:07,050 --> 00:53:08,050
We're going home?
632
00:53:08,550 --> 00:53:09,550
Buddy, I know.
633
00:53:09,730 --> 00:53:11,530
I don't want to go home empty -handed
either.
634
00:53:12,110 --> 00:53:14,390
But we came out here to make anaconda.
635
00:54:07,400 --> 00:54:08,400
Emergency meeting.
636
00:54:08,620 --> 00:54:11,080
Cast and crew only. Kenny, sit down.
What is that?
637
00:54:11,340 --> 00:54:12,218
Be patient.
638
00:54:12,220 --> 00:54:16,760
We have some time before the next port,
and I had an idea last night that I
639
00:54:16,760 --> 00:54:18,940
think it's just too damn good not to
shoot. Doug!
640
00:54:19,680 --> 00:54:21,300
Everybody's pretty burnt, man.
641
00:54:21,560 --> 00:54:25,100
Just hear me out. I'm begging you,
please, Kenny. All right. Sorry, boss.
642
00:54:25,100 --> 00:54:30,260
you. What if you two, on your way to
find the anaconda, run into a total
643
00:54:30,260 --> 00:54:31,440
on an incredible quest?
644
00:54:31,840 --> 00:54:33,420
Oh, that's interesting.
645
00:54:33,900 --> 00:54:34,900
Let me go.
646
00:54:35,900 --> 00:54:37,140
So is illegal gold mining?
647
00:54:37,400 --> 00:54:39,160
We don't raise the stakes.
648
00:54:39,540 --> 00:54:43,260
Exactly. And while they're hunting down
this mythical snake, they actually end
649
00:54:43,260 --> 00:54:44,400
up fighting the real villain.
650
00:54:44,760 --> 00:54:45,940
An even bigger snake.
651
00:54:46,180 --> 00:54:47,680
Man. Oh, yeah.
652
00:54:47,980 --> 00:54:48,980
Yeah.
653
00:54:49,300 --> 00:54:51,100
Man. I like this.
654
00:54:51,880 --> 00:54:52,880
This is good.
655
00:54:52,980 --> 00:54:55,920
And if we add this element, it does make
the movie much bigger.
656
00:54:56,600 --> 00:54:58,980
Like now it's about something.
657
00:55:01,840 --> 00:55:03,340
Theme. Theme.
658
00:55:10,830 --> 00:55:11,870
Uh... Yeah.
659
00:55:12,810 --> 00:55:13,810
Okay, yeah.
660
00:55:13,890 --> 00:55:20,370
You know, guys, I didn't want to say
anything before, but... This thing might
661
00:55:20,370 --> 00:55:21,370
an awards play.
662
00:55:21,850 --> 00:55:26,410
I mean, the Academy loves social work,
right?
663
00:55:28,210 --> 00:55:31,570
Dude, you could be the white Jordan
Peele.
664
00:55:32,490 --> 00:55:34,490
I was thinking the same thing.
665
00:55:38,160 --> 00:55:39,620
We've been through so much, you guys.
666
00:55:40,480 --> 00:55:41,860
Let's finish this movie.
667
00:55:44,540 --> 00:55:45,540
I'm in.
668
00:55:45,860 --> 00:55:46,980
Let's do it. Yeah.
669
00:55:47,700 --> 00:55:52,020
Who are you going to get to play this
new awesome character?
670
00:55:55,080 --> 00:55:56,080
Homer!
671
00:55:57,220 --> 00:55:59,640
What a naughty job.
672
00:56:00,020 --> 00:56:00,919
And cut.
673
00:56:00,920 --> 00:56:03,220
Yes! That's what I'm talking about.
674
00:56:03,560 --> 00:56:05,680
Nice. Are you sure you've never acted
before?
675
00:56:05,900 --> 00:56:06,808
I swear.
676
00:56:06,810 --> 00:56:08,290
Some of the best acting I've ever seen.
677
00:56:09,050 --> 00:56:10,050
You're a natural.
678
00:56:10,250 --> 00:56:13,110
You're incredible. Thank you. Take five.
Next up, we got 72.
679
00:56:14,230 --> 00:56:15,230
Guys,
680
00:56:15,450 --> 00:56:16,450
you see what I'm saying?
681
00:56:17,610 --> 00:56:21,110
She's incredible, right? Yeah, she is.
Hey, a question, though.
682
00:56:21,830 --> 00:56:25,810
If she saves us, it doesn't really give
my character anything to do.
683
00:56:26,010 --> 00:56:30,570
Yeah. This was supposed to be the moment
where my character starts falling for
684
00:56:30,570 --> 00:56:34,570
Derek, so he needs to do something
heroic, you know? I'm selfish.
685
00:56:35,210 --> 00:56:38,910
I don't know, you guys, this just feels
like her moment. She actually did it in
686
00:56:38,910 --> 00:56:39,910
real life.
687
00:56:40,010 --> 00:56:43,890
But good news, I'm going to shoot all
the rest on her so you guys have the day
688
00:56:43,890 --> 00:56:44,890
off.
689
00:56:45,150 --> 00:56:46,150
See you later.
690
00:56:47,590 --> 00:56:48,690
Take the day off.
691
00:56:50,310 --> 00:56:51,310
Huh.
692
00:56:57,350 --> 00:57:00,770
This is our movie, Griff, and he's just
cutting us out.
693
00:57:01,190 --> 00:57:02,970
Yep. Welcome to show business, baby.
694
00:57:03,310 --> 00:57:04,570
You're not in unless you're in.
695
00:57:04,810 --> 00:57:05,810
screwed over by your friend.
696
00:57:10,290 --> 00:57:14,390
You ever wake up and wonder, what the
hell have I done with my life?
697
00:57:15,310 --> 00:57:16,310
Yeah.
698
00:57:16,590 --> 00:57:17,590
Like every day.
699
00:57:18,010 --> 00:57:21,390
Hey, at least you had the guts to go
after what you wanted. You think I
700
00:57:21,390 --> 00:57:22,390
to go to law school?
701
00:57:22,830 --> 00:57:24,170
What have I got to go for, though?
702
00:57:24,790 --> 00:57:25,790
You know what I have?
703
00:57:25,950 --> 00:57:29,270
I have a terrible apartment and a 74
-year -old roommate.
704
00:57:31,490 --> 00:57:34,800
Sometimes I go to Trader Joe's just
to... Feel air conditioning.
705
00:57:36,060 --> 00:57:37,560
You at least have a career.
706
00:57:39,160 --> 00:57:41,340
I mean, what do I have to show for it?
707
00:57:42,300 --> 00:57:45,420
I got no family, no career.
708
00:57:46,360 --> 00:57:48,040
Never done anything that matters.
709
00:57:48,700 --> 00:57:49,700
Nothing.
710
00:57:52,280 --> 00:57:53,300
Never too late.
711
00:58:05,130 --> 00:58:06,130
a movie.
712
00:58:10,430 --> 00:58:14,090
Hola, amigo. Jesus, come on, get
dressed. We've got a packed day.
713
00:58:14,390 --> 00:58:17,490
What are you talking about? I am
dressed. I'm dressed really pretty, very
714
00:58:17,490 --> 00:58:21,270
nicely. All right, can you just take a
cold shower? We've got to film like now.
715
00:58:21,450 --> 00:58:23,190
You know what you should call the movie?
716
00:58:24,710 --> 00:58:25,910
Anaconda. Get it?
717
00:58:27,270 --> 00:58:30,210
Anaconda. Because of Anna. Can you just
get in costume?
718
00:58:30,550 --> 00:58:32,490
You know what? You wouldn't even be here
if it wasn't for me.
719
00:58:33,200 --> 00:58:36,620
Without me, you'd still be stuck in
Buffalo shooting your bullshit wedding
720
00:58:36,620 --> 00:58:37,620
videos.
721
00:58:39,080 --> 00:58:41,020
Films. Yeah, you can tell yourself that.
722
00:58:41,360 --> 00:58:43,900
Mike, you know what? I vouch for you,
too.
723
00:58:44,180 --> 00:58:47,680
You're the rights holder. So, like, who
is this guy? I said, trust me, he's
724
00:58:47,680 --> 00:58:48,680
good.
725
00:58:50,140 --> 00:58:51,140
What is that?
726
00:59:06,510 --> 00:59:07,510
Are you guys shooting a movie?
727
00:59:07,950 --> 00:59:09,750
We're doing a reboot of Anaconda.
728
00:59:10,650 --> 00:59:11,650
Come again?
729
00:59:11,910 --> 00:59:13,770
A reboot of Anaconda.
730
00:59:14,450 --> 00:59:17,090
Anaconda? Like Ice Cube Anaconda?
731
00:59:17,390 --> 00:59:18,390
Yes.
732
00:59:36,490 --> 00:59:37,490
That's weird.
733
00:59:39,630 --> 00:59:40,970
So let me get this straight.
734
00:59:41,670 --> 00:59:44,310
You don't have the rights to Anaconda?
735
00:59:45,570 --> 00:59:48,690
No, well, I... Not legally.
736
00:59:49,650 --> 00:59:52,610
And you've never owned the rights to
Anaconda?
737
00:59:55,530 --> 00:59:57,290
I mean, who owned Anaconda?
738
00:59:57,590 --> 01:00:02,610
Tony. Tony owned Anaconda. Yeah, no, no,
no, I mean, like, you know...
739
01:00:02,940 --> 01:00:04,260
In the larger sense.
740
01:00:04,580 --> 01:00:09,140
Why would you tell us that you had the
right to the goddamn Anaconda franchise
741
01:00:09,140 --> 01:00:13,960
when you very much don't have the rights
to the goddamn Anaconda franchise?
742
01:00:14,600 --> 01:00:18,640
Do we really even need the rights,
really? I mean, like, who gives a shit?
743
01:00:20,560 --> 01:00:21,560
About IP?
744
01:00:21,820 --> 01:00:23,500
Yeah. Literally everyone.
745
01:00:24,600 --> 01:00:27,180
That's what big movies are! That's why
we're here!
746
01:00:27,620 --> 01:00:31,340
You think that's why we're here? Yes,
that's why we're here! We almost died!
747
01:00:33,260 --> 01:00:36,960
damn jungle for a lie. I had to lie.
748
01:00:38,120 --> 01:00:41,560
I had to lie to you. You wouldn't have
come otherwise. You wouldn't. None of
749
01:00:41,560 --> 01:00:42,560
would have.
750
01:00:43,520 --> 01:00:44,800
Bullshit. Not bullshit.
751
01:00:45,040 --> 01:00:48,120
That's why you never came out to L .A.
with me in the first place. Even though
752
01:00:48,120 --> 01:00:49,920
we had a whole plan to work together.
753
01:00:50,260 --> 01:00:53,400
Your whole life has been dictated by
fear.
754
01:00:55,300 --> 01:00:58,740
Griff, you're fired.
755
01:00:59,620 --> 01:01:01,140
What? You're fired.
756
01:01:04,380 --> 01:01:07,020
No, no, I'm not. You can't fire me. You
know why?
757
01:01:07,920 --> 01:01:09,560
Because I quit already.
758
01:01:10,760 --> 01:01:11,760
Last night.
759
01:01:14,920 --> 01:01:16,320
I just didn't tell anybody yet.
760
01:01:17,860 --> 01:01:23,640
So... Too bad for you, I guess. Because
I already quit.
761
01:01:43,280 --> 01:01:45,580
on the Anaconda boat. Maybe they can
help me get home.
762
01:01:45,800 --> 01:01:47,720
Just think about this. It's not safe.
763
01:01:48,100 --> 01:01:49,200
That's a tiny boat.
764
01:01:49,660 --> 01:01:51,320
There's a giant snake out there.
765
01:01:54,220 --> 01:01:55,780
Please don't do this.
766
01:02:42,760 --> 01:02:43,760
J -Lo!
767
01:02:44,180 --> 01:02:45,180
Ice Cube!
768
01:02:46,840 --> 01:02:47,840
John Boyd!
769
01:02:48,440 --> 01:02:49,540
Are you in this one?
770
01:02:53,620 --> 01:02:54,620
It's okay!
771
01:02:55,180 --> 01:02:56,058
It's okay!
772
01:02:56,060 --> 01:02:58,240
Calm down! I'll come get you! It's okay!
773
01:02:58,440 --> 01:02:59,238
You're safe!
774
01:02:59,240 --> 01:03:00,240
You're safe!
775
01:03:01,660 --> 01:03:04,080
Oh, God!
776
01:03:12,240 --> 01:03:13,078
Oh, my God!
777
01:03:13,080 --> 01:03:14,080
Oh, my God!
778
01:03:14,380 --> 01:03:15,380
Oh, my God!
779
01:03:17,760 --> 01:03:21,080
Doug. Doug, what's going on? Why have we
stopped?
780
01:03:21,540 --> 01:03:26,000
Well, uh, Anna found a great place to
shoot the next scene. The next scene?
781
01:03:26,200 --> 01:03:31,300
Okay, I know. Losing Griff was hard, but
between the four of us, we can finish
782
01:03:31,300 --> 01:03:35,980
this film. I'm not going home empty
-handed. Come on, man. Without Griff,
783
01:03:35,980 --> 01:03:40,300
not part of the plan. Well, plans
change, and that's part of filmmaking,
784
01:03:40,340 --> 01:03:44,090
No, no, Doug, we... We have to go back
for him. He's not safe out there. Anna,
785
01:03:44,210 --> 01:03:47,710
we need to turn the boat around. We are
not turning the boat around. Yeah, we're
786
01:03:47,710 --> 01:03:50,710
not turning the boat around. Everyone up
the boat now.
787
01:03:51,350 --> 01:03:52,350
What's going on?
788
01:03:54,150 --> 01:03:59,290
Anna, what are you doing? This
definitely isn't the plan. Well, plans
789
01:03:59,490 --> 01:04:00,970
Doug. Isn't that filmmaking?
790
01:04:02,310 --> 01:04:04,290
And every good film needs a bit of a
twist.
791
01:05:00,400 --> 01:05:01,400
to the dog.
792
01:05:27,850 --> 01:05:30,890
You're going to carry these for me back
to the boat. Let's go. And then what?
793
01:05:32,290 --> 01:05:33,570
And then you're going to shoot us?
794
01:05:33,810 --> 01:05:34,810
No!
795
01:05:35,990 --> 01:05:39,370
I'm not going anywhere until you tell me
what's inside these bags.
796
01:05:39,690 --> 01:05:40,690
You want to look at it?
797
01:05:41,070 --> 01:05:42,070
Look at it.
798
01:05:49,430 --> 01:05:50,430
Wait.
799
01:05:50,670 --> 01:05:53,930
Is that... Gold?
800
01:05:54,270 --> 01:05:55,270
You're the miner?
801
01:05:55,350 --> 01:05:56,990
You did all of this for money?
802
01:05:57,500 --> 01:05:58,500
Very quick, Larry.
803
01:06:01,920 --> 01:06:04,080
I'm not going to be part of your sick
quest.
804
01:06:04,740 --> 01:06:05,740
Holy shit.
805
01:06:06,820 --> 01:06:07,820
Wait.
806
01:06:13,100 --> 01:06:18,680
You don't move.
807
01:06:23,440 --> 01:06:26,540
I'm with the government to track illegal
gold miners.
808
01:06:27,040 --> 01:06:29,840
And then here runs one of the biggest
rings in Brazil.
809
01:06:30,940 --> 01:06:37,000
Don't trust anything she says. She's a
liar.
810
01:06:37,260 --> 01:06:38,300
She's a damn liar.
811
01:06:38,580 --> 01:06:42,420
We're filmmakers from Buffalo. We're
working on a spiritual sequel to
812
01:06:42,560 --> 01:06:44,940
And I don't know if she mentioned that,
but it's not just a reboot.
813
01:06:45,200 --> 01:06:49,280
And I kicked out my friend who had the
lead. And I gave her a juicy -ass role.
814
01:06:49,520 --> 01:06:51,060
And this is how she treats her. Shut up.
815
01:06:51,520 --> 01:06:54,700
I don't know what you're talking about,
man. Off topic. Go.
816
01:06:54,900 --> 01:06:56,520
Arrest her. Oh, thank God.
817
01:07:08,360 --> 01:07:10,780
Oh, my God!
818
01:07:13,080 --> 01:07:14,620
Who shot me?
819
01:07:16,100 --> 01:07:17,420
Maybe me, asshole.
820
01:07:17,820 --> 01:07:18,820
Griff? No.
821
01:07:19,020 --> 01:07:20,220
He was a good guy.
822
01:07:20,460 --> 01:07:22,060
I'm a good guy. He's a cop!
823
01:07:22,260 --> 01:07:23,260
Look, I don't... What?
824
01:07:25,509 --> 01:07:28,670
I'm a good guy. Drop it on your knees
now. They're part of you. Take him to
825
01:07:28,670 --> 01:07:29,670
water.
826
01:07:30,790 --> 01:07:32,050
Wait. No.
827
01:07:40,530 --> 01:07:41,530
No,
828
01:07:46,930 --> 01:07:47,908
no, Hannah.
829
01:07:47,910 --> 01:07:48,990
Don't do this.
830
01:07:49,410 --> 01:07:52,590
You too, Claire, on your knees now. You
don't have to be this person.
831
01:07:54,410 --> 01:07:55,430
I have children at home.
832
01:07:55,910 --> 01:07:57,050
They're 10 and 13.
833
01:07:57,850 --> 01:07:58,850
Please.
834
01:07:59,570 --> 01:08:03,950
Please. Think about what you're doing to
my kids. Just shut your mouth. Turn
835
01:08:03,950 --> 01:08:04,950
around now.
836
01:08:23,660 --> 01:08:24,840
That's how you headbutt, bitch!
837
01:08:29,840 --> 01:08:30,840
You won't do it.
838
01:08:31,240 --> 01:08:32,960
You don't have the balls. I know you,
Claire.
839
01:08:33,240 --> 01:08:34,240
You don't know me.
840
01:08:34,720 --> 01:08:35,899
I don't even have kids.
841
01:08:55,560 --> 01:08:58,760
Yeah, but so is the snake. We can't go
that way. We've got to take this trail
842
01:08:58,760 --> 01:09:00,180
and get to the high ground.
843
01:09:00,460 --> 01:09:01,460
Wait, what's that?
844
01:09:02,779 --> 01:09:03,779
What?
845
01:09:06,000 --> 01:09:09,880
Did it bite you? Yeah, you know what? I
think it bit me. I think it got me.
846
01:09:10,120 --> 01:09:13,640
Yeah, I know it hurts, but we've got to
get out of here now to get the snake out
847
01:09:13,640 --> 01:09:16,859
there. Sorry, I can't move. My leg is
freaking out.
848
01:09:17,439 --> 01:09:18,500
What are we going to do?
849
01:09:19,340 --> 01:09:20,700
We're going to have to piss on you, man.
850
01:09:21,500 --> 01:09:24,180
Huh? On the bike is the only way.
851
01:09:24,700 --> 01:09:28,140
I thought that was just jellyfish. No,
no, no, no. It's all animals.
852
01:09:28,520 --> 01:09:29,700
Are you sure? Positive.
853
01:09:30,300 --> 01:09:31,819
Someone's got a pith. I need one of your
piths.
854
01:09:32,160 --> 01:09:37,359
I'd love to be able to help out, but I'm
just, I am drained, tapped, bone dry.
855
01:09:38,060 --> 01:09:41,260
Claire, you want to take care of this?
I'm wearing a onesie. Jenny, we don't
856
01:09:41,260 --> 01:09:42,840
have time to argue about this. You're
right.
857
01:09:43,340 --> 01:09:44,740
You know this is impossible.
858
01:09:45,620 --> 01:09:46,620
Why not?
859
01:09:46,979 --> 01:09:49,800
Because he's pee shy.
860
01:09:50,360 --> 01:09:55,520
I have urinary stage fright. I haven't
been able to pee in public in 35 years
861
01:09:55,520 --> 01:09:56,279
my life.
862
01:09:56,280 --> 01:09:57,700
Fuck! You can do this.
863
01:09:58,220 --> 01:09:59,380
You have to do this.
864
01:10:00,300 --> 01:10:01,300
Whiz on me.
865
01:10:01,540 --> 01:10:02,800
You got it, buddy. Okay.
866
01:10:03,420 --> 01:10:05,700
Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah.
867
01:10:06,020 --> 01:10:09,380
You can do it. You can do it. Let it
flow. Let it flow. Yeah.
868
01:10:10,000 --> 01:10:11,000
Just piss on me.
869
01:10:11,060 --> 01:10:12,060
Come on, whiz on me.
870
01:10:12,380 --> 01:10:13,980
Whiz on me. Do it. Whiz on me.
871
01:10:14,600 --> 01:10:16,460
You don't think I want to?
872
01:10:17,870 --> 01:10:19,630
I would love to piss all over you, man.
873
01:10:20,610 --> 01:10:22,010
But it's not in the cards.
874
01:10:22,390 --> 01:10:23,490
Whiz on me. Again.
875
01:10:23,730 --> 01:10:26,070
Now. You can do it.
876
01:10:26,490 --> 01:10:31,410
Whiz on me. Do it, Ken. That is an
order. Whiz on me. Now. Again.
877
01:10:32,670 --> 01:10:33,670
Okay.
878
01:10:36,150 --> 01:10:37,350
There's one more problem.
879
01:10:37,590 --> 01:10:39,970
What? I haven't told you about this.
880
01:10:40,470 --> 01:10:42,270
I can only pee sitting down.
881
01:10:42,530 --> 01:10:43,570
Jesus Christ.
882
01:10:43,910 --> 01:10:44,990
I need a chair.
883
01:11:52,110 --> 01:11:54,350
I've loved you for a long, long time.
884
01:11:55,010 --> 01:11:56,010
Jealous?
885
01:12:35,980 --> 01:12:38,660
I tricked him into coming here, and now
he's dead.
886
01:12:38,880 --> 01:12:43,120
No. No. We all chose to be here. I wish
it was me.
887
01:12:44,240 --> 01:12:45,400
It should be me.
888
01:12:45,640 --> 01:12:48,700
This is not your fault, and we have to
keep going. Hey, guys.
889
01:12:49,760 --> 01:12:52,080
I think I found out which way we should
go.
890
01:13:13,840 --> 01:13:16,920
We've got to get across that to get to
the boat. But we can't just run across.
891
01:13:17,080 --> 01:13:18,080
It's too exposed.
892
01:13:18,720 --> 01:13:20,100
The snake could come from anywhere.
893
01:13:21,840 --> 01:13:23,340
Maybe we can create a distraction.
894
01:13:24,820 --> 01:13:27,700
Yeah, yeah, maybe. But how do we do
that?
895
01:13:29,300 --> 01:13:30,680
I mean, it's going to be...
896
01:14:25,520 --> 01:14:26,358
Come on, man.
897
01:14:26,360 --> 01:14:27,360
Baby.
898
01:14:28,040 --> 01:14:29,500
Oh, Jesus Christ.
899
01:14:34,580 --> 01:14:36,440
Wait. Wait.
900
01:14:39,920 --> 01:14:42,220
Baby duck is the distraction.
901
01:14:44,780 --> 01:14:47,760
How? I know this is horrible, okay?
902
01:14:57,450 --> 01:15:00,710
We make it really hard for the snake to
swallow them.
903
01:15:02,150 --> 01:15:05,190
It'll occupy the snake long enough for
it to get across the field.
904
01:15:07,550 --> 01:15:09,050
Isn't that a really smart idea?
905
01:15:14,550 --> 01:15:18,230
Oh, gosh, this is horrible. It's been
saving all of us. I'm sure Doug would
906
01:15:18,230 --> 01:15:18,929
wanted this.
907
01:15:18,930 --> 01:15:20,170
I'm not sure he would have wanted this.
908
01:15:20,390 --> 01:15:21,390
Wait.
909
01:15:21,510 --> 01:15:22,510
What are you doing?
910
01:15:27,310 --> 01:15:28,310
Screw me.
911
01:16:03,370 --> 01:16:04,370
I can't.
912
01:16:09,550 --> 01:16:10,550
Oh,
913
01:16:13,030 --> 01:16:14,250
shit.
914
01:16:18,690 --> 01:16:19,669
He's alive.
915
01:16:19,670 --> 01:16:20,670
He's alive.
916
01:16:20,730 --> 01:16:25,730
I thought you checked his pulse. Right
there. No, you did a shitty job. What
917
01:16:25,730 --> 01:16:26,730
fuck?
918
01:17:59,180 --> 01:17:59,779
Okay, now.
919
01:17:59,780 --> 01:18:02,080
I thought we lost you, man. Can I say
something?
920
01:18:03,420 --> 01:18:04,420
I'm sorry.
921
01:18:04,980 --> 01:18:08,980
I think I got so caught up in wanting to
play a hero that I lost sight of what
922
01:18:08,980 --> 01:18:12,380
it is that's really important to me, and
that's just making stuff with you guys
923
01:18:12,380 --> 01:18:13,380
again.
924
01:18:13,960 --> 01:18:16,800
Griff, I feel the exact same way. I love
you guys.
925
01:18:17,160 --> 01:18:18,600
I just have one question.
926
01:18:21,040 --> 01:18:24,320
Whose idea was it to put that dead
squirrel in my mouth?
927
01:18:27,120 --> 01:18:28,380
Like a group decision.
928
01:18:28,700 --> 01:18:30,460
Really? Yeah, it wasn't like one person.
929
01:18:32,060 --> 01:18:35,440
Snake, love, grow meat. I knew it was
your idea!
930
01:18:35,660 --> 01:18:38,480
Guys, come on, we gotta keep moving.
Alright, well I made a choice, let's
931
01:18:38,480 --> 01:18:39,480
him with it!
932
01:19:17,960 --> 01:19:18,960
Anyone there?
933
01:19:19,000 --> 01:19:20,000
Hello?
934
01:19:22,400 --> 01:19:23,580
Can you help us?
935
01:19:26,440 --> 01:19:27,440
What? What?
936
01:19:27,800 --> 01:19:28,800
What?
937
01:19:33,800 --> 01:19:35,080
Again? Sorry?
938
01:20:04,810 --> 01:20:05,810
I should.
939
01:20:05,850 --> 01:20:06,850
Who'd you think it was?
940
01:20:07,250 --> 01:20:08,250
John Boyk?
941
01:20:08,570 --> 01:20:09,570
Let's go.
942
01:20:15,710 --> 01:20:16,710
Let's go.
943
01:20:17,430 --> 01:20:19,310
Get in here. Get in here, two socks.
944
01:20:49,870 --> 01:20:53,430
so she don't be okay, but here it came
from the block.
945
01:20:53,830 --> 01:20:54,930
Jesus damn it.
946
01:20:55,730 --> 01:20:59,970
I don't know how we're going to do it,
but we have to kill it before it kills
947
01:20:59,970 --> 01:21:01,870
us. I'm with that. I'm with that.
948
01:21:02,190 --> 01:21:04,010
How are they going to do it in your
script?
949
01:21:05,470 --> 01:21:06,470
I don't know.
950
01:21:07,050 --> 01:21:09,010
The writer never finished the third act.
951
01:21:09,230 --> 01:21:10,230
What?
952
01:21:10,390 --> 01:21:13,690
You guys started shooting before you
knew the end. Welcome to Hollywood,
953
01:21:13,970 --> 01:21:15,950
buttercup. That's what they do.
954
01:21:16,230 --> 01:21:18,070
They just make it up as they go along.
955
01:21:18,390 --> 01:21:20,890
What was the general gist? Do you have
any idea?
956
01:21:21,250 --> 01:21:24,710
All I know is they were setting up
pyrotechnics all through here.
957
01:21:25,270 --> 01:21:26,410
Is it still up?
958
01:21:26,630 --> 01:21:27,950
It's hooked up, but I don't know.
959
01:21:49,680 --> 01:21:51,440
Actors code. Respect.
960
01:22:45,130 --> 01:22:49,150
Just make sure that it's exactly what
I'm thinking, which I'm sure it is
961
01:22:49,150 --> 01:22:50,650
totally. I'm super sure.
962
01:22:52,490 --> 01:22:53,830
Think about killing that snake.
963
01:22:55,090 --> 01:22:56,330
That's what I was thinking that too.
964
01:22:58,370 --> 01:22:59,570
Okay, here's the plan.
965
01:23:00,450 --> 01:23:02,250
Greg, you get the detonator for Kenny.
966
01:23:03,670 --> 01:23:05,590
Blair, you fire up the generators.
967
01:23:07,790 --> 01:23:09,390
Kenny, you set up the cameras.
968
01:23:13,480 --> 01:23:14,620
I'll get the golf cart.
969
01:23:15,260 --> 01:23:19,780
We'll lure the snake into the pyro field
and end it once and for all.
970
01:23:21,760 --> 01:23:23,820
You ready for a big Hollywood ending?
971
01:23:31,040 --> 01:23:32,040
You ready?
972
01:23:32,360 --> 01:23:35,560
Tim said as soon as we get to the pyro
field, we can detonate these one by one.
973
01:23:35,740 --> 01:23:39,000
Gonna blow that bitch sky high. Sky
freaking high.
974
01:24:24,100 --> 01:24:25,840
I don't know where it is.
975
01:25:00,800 --> 01:25:03,780
Something like this.
976
01:25:43,400 --> 01:25:44,400
I forgot to turn it on.
977
01:27:27,210 --> 01:27:28,730
Not on my watch, mister.
978
01:28:11,980 --> 01:28:13,280
And that's a wrap on Nick.
979
01:29:12,720 --> 01:29:18,380
A group of artists had a vision to one
day live their dream of making a major
980
01:29:18,380 --> 01:29:19,380
motion picture.
981
01:29:19,460 --> 01:29:25,000
And last year, against all odds, I'm
proud to say that dream was realized.
982
01:29:29,000 --> 01:29:33,860
As my friend Kenny likes to say, the
snake is a metaphor for the monsters
983
01:29:33,860 --> 01:29:38,060
come for all of us if our dreams remain
unrealized. And to be clear, there's
984
01:29:38,060 --> 01:29:40,340
also a non -metaphoric snake.
985
01:29:42,860 --> 01:29:46,740
Quick shout out to Claire Simon and
Kenny Pratt.
986
01:29:48,160 --> 01:29:50,260
It's our last next time.
987
01:29:50,880 --> 01:29:55,580
While we may not have the right.
988
01:29:55,820 --> 01:29:58,400
We don't, we don't have, we definitely
don't have the right. This is our
989
01:29:58,400 --> 01:30:05,020
completely unauthorized, possibly
illegal, reboot
990
01:30:05,020 --> 01:30:06,840
of the Sony classic film.
991
01:30:09,060 --> 01:30:10,340
Ladies and gentlemen.
992
01:30:11,820 --> 01:30:13,200
The Anaconda.
993
01:31:31,470 --> 01:31:32,490
Are you Doug McAllister?
994
01:31:33,230 --> 01:31:34,230
Uh -huh.
995
01:31:34,630 --> 01:31:38,170
You directed the unauthorized version of
Anaconda, even though you didn't have
996
01:31:38,170 --> 01:31:39,170
the rights.
997
01:31:40,030 --> 01:31:41,030
Yeah.
998
01:31:41,330 --> 01:31:42,730
I saw your little movie.
999
01:31:45,290 --> 01:31:46,970
And I loved it.
1000
01:31:47,270 --> 01:31:48,270
I loved it.
1001
01:31:48,630 --> 01:31:52,490
That's why I'm here. I'm here because
we're doing another Anaconda.
1002
01:31:53,190 --> 01:31:54,710
And I want you to direct it.
1003
01:31:56,190 --> 01:31:57,190
Are you in?
1004
01:32:11,820 --> 01:32:12,820
The hell with romance.
1005
01:32:55,760 --> 01:32:57,300
Tough, did you notice that butt was
tough?
1006
01:32:58,020 --> 01:32:59,260
Keeping the jeans he's wearing.
1007
01:32:59,540 --> 01:33:03,200
I'm hooked and I can't stop staring. Oh,
baby, I want to get it.
72122
Can't find what you're looking for?
Get subtitles in any language from opensubtitles.com, and translate them here.
Afrikaans
Akan
Amharic
Armenian
Basque
Belarusian
Bemba
Bengali
Bihari
Bosnian
Breton
Bulgarian
Cambodian
Catalan
Cebuano
Cherokee
Chichewa
Chinese (Simplified)
Chinese (Traditional)
Corsican
Danish
Esperanto
Estonian
Faroese
Finnish
Frisian
Galician
Georgian
German
Greek
Guarani
Haitian Creole
Hausa
Hawaiian
Hebrew
Hmong
Icelandic
Irish
Japanese
Javanese
Kazakh
Kinyarwanda
Kirundi
Kongo
Korean
Krio (Sierra Leone)
Kurdish
Kyrgyz
Laothian
Latin
Latvian
Lithuanian
Luganda
Luo
Luxembourgish
Macedonian
Malagasy
Maltese
Maori
Mauritian Creole
Moldavian
Mongolian
Myanmar (Burmese)
Montenegrin
Nepali
Norwegian
Pashto
Persian
Polish
Quechua
Romansh
Russian
Samoan
Scots Gaelic
Serbian
Sesotho
Setswana
Seychellois Creole
Shona
Sindhi
Sinhalese
Slovak
Slovenian
Swedish
Tajik
Tigrinya
Tonga
Turkish
Turkmen
Ukrainian
Uzbek
Vietnamese
Welsh
Wolof