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I had been feeling very lost in absolute freedom.
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Not having any responsibilities besides this boat,
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not having anything to do.
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So when Lærke told me that she wanted to go sailing,
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I got really excited about the possibility of a project.
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I knew I wanted to do a project that was not about me.
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It was not necessarily about the boat,
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it was not necessarily about
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how we sail or whatever,
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but I wanted it to include other people.
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I've always lived my life in such a way
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that when I feel something exciting,
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I chase after it and keep doing it and keep talking about it
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as if it's going to happen, whether I know it is or not.
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That's how you sail?!
- Yeah.
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It just seemed very cool to join the idea of women
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sailing across the North Atlantic,
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which not many people do in general,
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it's not the choice trip
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because it's rough.
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And the boat being so rustic and simple
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in its capabilities to sail across, it's interesting.
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Mara Noka is a James Wharram design.
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NARAI Mark one,
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built in 1971 through ‘74.
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It's based off of the Rongo,
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which was James Wharram’s second boat
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that he built to cross the North Atlantic
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west to east for the first time ever.
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Nobody had done that on a catamaran before.
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I found Mara Noka in Panama.
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I did not know how to sail at all when I got the boat,
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I did not know how to pull up the mainsail.
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I understood wind,
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but when I started sailing,
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it really felt like the boat was sailing me.
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After one week of sailing constantly
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for the first time,
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I started to know the noises
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and that was such an interesting experience.
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I don’t know, you create like a symbiosis with this vessel.
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Through that first year of sailing,
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it was really, really rough all the time
to watch the boat get loose
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and feeling this sense of debt to the boat.
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I could feel that it was in pain sometimes,
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but still enjoyed what it was doing.
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There’s just such a special connection with it.
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It felt like it was excited for
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new adventures.
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When I lived in my hometown, I would go often down
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and just sit by the water and look out.
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And even though it was a bay,
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you couldn't see land on the other side,
and I've always just found a lot of
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peace in looking at the ocean,
because it's like a blank canvas and
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you can just look out and
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anything seems possible.
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I've always wanted to
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sail on a long journey since I was a child,
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and I remember these books
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from this sailor family in Denmark that
my parents would read to me,
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and there was one about one of the kids
going on this big journey,
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and they were in the Caribbean, and
they met all these animals.
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Like seeing dolphins and turtles,
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and it's just been in my head for a long time,
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and then I just started to tell people that
I was going across the Atlantic,
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and then sometimes I create my own reality
by just repeating stuff,
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and then that was what I wanted to do.
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Eventually
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figured it would be really cool to document
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how the plastic travels across the ocean, because that was
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something that impacted me a lot on my first Atlantic crossing.
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Plastic pollution
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in our oceans is a huge problem,
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and it's constantly making me think about better solutions.
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I live in the Canary Islands where I work with Clean Ocean Project,
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so I'm always on the beach collecting trash, doing beach cleanups.
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And I remember one time on one beach we found
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over 45 plastic bottles and they were from all over the world,
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and many of those bottles have crossed the Atlantic
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because they travel with the same winds and the currents as the boats do.
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So I thought it would be interesting to follow that journey.
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I just need, I need help. Yeah.
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Well, can I help?
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I met Kiana when she had just done her first
Atlantic crossing by herself,
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and she was passing through the Canary Islands, and I thought,
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what a badass woman,
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I want to do something with her.
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So we started talking, and quickly
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we started dreaming about doing a project
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and we had no money.
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But eventually I thought, I want to do this
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and I want to make it happen no matter what.
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So I sold my old car.
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I sold my surfboard.
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I told everyone, “See you in three months.”
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and I went to see Kiana.
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I met her in the boatyard,
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and then she told me
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there are a few problems with the boat,
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but we're still going to be sailing in two weeks.
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The two weeks quickly turned into a full year.
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We ended up peeling the tar
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and nylon coating off of the boat
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and exposing all the bare wood
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that we glassed over, which was a very laborious process.
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On top of that, fare and paint,
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prime and paint.
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Then we changed the entire top deck.
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Yeah! Watch out!
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We learned that nothing really ever goes as planned,
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and that's just a big part of the whole adventure.
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And even if it was hard most of the time,
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we were lucky that we received a lot of support
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from friends and family and people around us,
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and that was a big motivator to keep going,
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and also, we both knew that the alternative
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that would be, giving up, would be even harder.
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♪ I have no money, nor anything to give
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♪ The only thing I have is love to love
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♪ If that's how you want me, then I can love you
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♪ But if you can't, there's nothing to do ♪
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Kiana, who I had only met once,
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previously at the boatyard
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when I saw this boat in shambles basically,
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sent me a message
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asking if I wanted to cross
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the North Atlantic Ocean
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and make a documentary about it.
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My first
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response was like, “yes,
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heck yeah!”
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It's been a dream of mine since early teenage years.
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Like maybe 13 or 15
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I started dreaming about sailing,
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but never really looking
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or seeking out for an experience.
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I feel very drawn
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to the unknown and pushing myself
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and being in uncomfortable situations
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and exciting situations.
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So it's just like the instinctual yes.
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Hell yes.
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Every cell in my body was like, “Let's go girl,
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let's go and cross an Ocean!”
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♪ I grew strong
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♪ And I learned how to get along ♪
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For preparations of the voyage,
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I always have a tendency of taking too much food,
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but in this instance, having three people instead of one,
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I was completely lost
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in the sense of like how much we would need.
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So I just used, like, all these kinds
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of vegetables that take a long time to go off.
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We had a 16 six-gallon jerry cans.
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In that one gallon per person per day,
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that includes your tea, your showering,
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your drinking water.
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Power comes from solar panels,
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180W of solar panels, and four batteries.
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And for cooking fuel, there's a propane stove,
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and we took three tanks of propane.
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I learned very quickly,
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after three weeks of waiting for “good” wind to leave,
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because I thought the wind was like,
“Yeah, haha, the wind is always good!”
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It requires a lot of patience, and it requires you
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to be very humble
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and wait
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and listen.
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And I think that has a lot to teach.
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“Oh I see. Oh…”
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That for me was a test in itself.
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I thought I was like, yeah, I'm patient, I'm Zen.
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But those first three weeks waiting for wind,
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I was not Zen.
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But it makes you
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just realize that you're not in control.
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All you can control is yourself, your emotional state.
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“Shock is a life threatening condition
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in which blood flow to the tissues of the body
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is inadequate and cells are deprived of oxygen.
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Any serious injury or illness can produce shock...”
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We left Beaufort, North Carolina on June 27th, 2022.
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Headed for Flores in the Azores.
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As the crow flies, that is 2200 nautical miles,
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so you'd hope that you'd be moving at 100 miles a day,
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and that would give us an arrival estimate
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of about 25 days.
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That whole experience of not seeing land.
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I wouldn't say it was a very dramatic feeling.
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Cause it's so fast that you don't see land.
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The whole time, even though you're surrounded by water,
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you just feel like you're in a small bubble,
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and I think it's just impossible to comprehend
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that you are in this massive ocean.
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Liz, you're doing a great job.
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Thank you for guiding us.
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I can't believe
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this is the boat that we painted.
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Sanded, like, did all these things.
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It's so strange to see it in the water.
203
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Thinking about this boat in the boatyard for so long.
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And now it’s was just doing what it's supposed to do.
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My plastic lookout spot.
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It's insane. We're in the middle of freaking nowhere.
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This one is freaking old.
- We knew that crossing the Atlantic,
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it would be basically impossible for us to pick up plastic.
209
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But then we thought that the best way would just be to document
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what we see and do it in the most systematic way.
211
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So we made a little logbook where we logged down everyday
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what we could see of plastic, what we were able to pick up, and then
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also just logging down the weather,
the conditions, the way the water looked.
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The boats we saw, wildlife.
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Oh, he’s stuck in there.
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There's a little fish inside?
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Yeah.
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Oh. Oh, he's still alive.
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00:17:50,819 --> 00:17:52,654
Yeah. He was breathing.
220
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He was probably stuck in there and couldn’t get out.
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Oh my God.
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I was so excited to be back out at sea on this boat
223
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that was longing for the water again for so long.
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It's the place where I feel the safest and the most alive,
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but also at the same time, I was super nervous
226
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because I had just rebuilt this boat.
227
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I didn't know how it was going to react
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to heavier swell or whatever we might face.
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And also, having crew aboard was super nerve-wracking because
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now I have not only the responsibility of myself and of the boat,
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but of two other lives.
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With the calmer weather it was really nice
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because then I was able to acclimate to
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the energy of other people on the boat.
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Over a year on the hard with the boat,
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we acquired many-a-creatures.
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One lizard, Liz.
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She stayed with us,
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ended up going out to sea, which I don't think she expected.
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And I really don't think she knew
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what she was getting herself into
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by making Mara Noka her new home.
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It's my co-captain.
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Navigator
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extraordinaire.
246
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How many nautical miles have we sailed?
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28
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and we have to sail 2200.
249
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Just a little bit more!
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Can I just do one? One quick one.
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Go, straight down.
252
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You can't really see much.
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Oh, look at it! So pretty.
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Good Night.
255
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Mwah.
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Being able to remove yourself from the land and the buzz
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and the people and all that energy,
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and to row out to your boat
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and you're in your own world.
260
00:21:07,224 --> 00:21:10,227
Your own small island in a calm sea.
261
00:21:11,687 --> 00:21:13,897
It makes the present way more present
262
00:21:14,064 --> 00:21:18,025
to not be connected to the whole world at the same time,
263
00:21:18,026 --> 00:21:19,777
and just be connected to yourself
264
00:21:19,778 --> 00:21:21,446
and where you are in that moment.
265
00:21:24,283 --> 00:21:26,492
It makes me feel able to
266
00:21:26,493 --> 00:21:30,329
just let my guard down and relax,
267
00:21:30,330 --> 00:21:32,832
and that vulnerability of being out at sea, too.
268
00:21:32,833 --> 00:21:35,418
It's not, like, I don't fight it.
269
00:21:35,419 --> 00:21:37,169
It doesn't make me feel uncomfortable.
270
00:21:37,170 --> 00:21:39,005
It is that surrender thing.
271
00:21:39,006 --> 00:21:42,758
It's being able to just let myself go
272
00:21:42,759 --> 00:21:45,887
and not have a guard or a wall up,
273
00:21:46,096 --> 00:21:48,973
which I think I do around people
274
00:21:48,974 --> 00:21:52,686
or around noises and movement and things.
275
00:22:01,194 --> 00:22:03,488
It’s a little piece of plastic there!
276
00:22:20,255 --> 00:22:23,341
There's something that happens in the brain
277
00:22:23,342 --> 00:22:27,012
where when time doesn’t exist, it's like, ‘I'm good!’
278
00:22:28,096 --> 00:22:30,222
I didn't really know what day was ever
279
00:22:30,223 --> 00:22:31,349
or, you know,
280
00:22:31,350 --> 00:22:33,852
what day of the week or what hour it was.
281
00:22:34,895 --> 00:22:37,898
There's no rush in having to do anything.
282
00:22:39,191 --> 00:22:42,068
I'm someone that moves very quickly
283
00:22:42,069 --> 00:22:43,235
throughout the world,
284
00:22:43,236 --> 00:22:46,364
and I don't know if I like that part of myself anymore.
285
00:22:46,365 --> 00:22:48,115
I like how productive I can be.
286
00:22:48,116 --> 00:22:52,536
But then also, there's this thing that the ocean calls you to do,
287
00:22:52,537 --> 00:22:53,955
and it's just to
288
00:22:54,581 --> 00:22:56,333
take your time.
289
00:23:09,554 --> 00:23:12,516
I wish that we all had more space to reflect
290
00:23:13,600 --> 00:23:17,019
upon nature and the vastness that surrounds us,
291
00:23:17,020 --> 00:23:20,356
and all the things that we're intricately connected to
292
00:23:20,357 --> 00:23:22,983
in mysterious ways and in very obvious ways,
293
00:23:22,984 --> 00:23:25,236
because we all kind of need each other,
294
00:23:25,237 --> 00:23:27,988
but we're just too busy to even think about it
295
00:23:27,989 --> 00:23:30,200
or have the desire to do it.
296
00:23:56,143 --> 00:23:58,936
I wouldn't say that the still days made me feel peaceful
297
00:23:58,937 --> 00:24:00,938
because Atlantic is massive
298
00:24:00,939 --> 00:24:02,982
and I know crossing the Atlantic,
299
00:24:02,983 --> 00:24:05,317
if were just floating around with no wind,
300
00:24:05,318 --> 00:24:07,695
it's going to take 90 days or more.
301
00:24:07,696 --> 00:24:11,575
So it felt relaxing in a very strange way, because
302
00:24:12,325 --> 00:24:16,454
if you're about to run a marathon
and there's a bench like after ten minutes
303
00:24:16,455 --> 00:24:19,165
and you sit down and you're not going to fully relax,
304
00:24:19,166 --> 00:24:22,168
I mean, it's nice that you can just sit down, but
305
00:24:22,169 --> 00:24:23,586
you know what's ahead of you.
306
00:24:23,587 --> 00:24:26,590
So it's an interesting feeling.
307
00:24:29,676 --> 00:24:31,470
In the North Atlantic
308
00:24:31,845 --> 00:24:33,180
wind will come.
309
00:24:33,597 --> 00:24:34,763
It’ll come.
310
00:24:34,764 --> 00:24:36,390
Is it going to be scary wind?
311
00:24:36,391 --> 00:24:37,308
No, I don't think so.
312
00:24:37,309 --> 00:24:38,435
But,
313
00:24:39,811 --> 00:24:42,731
we won’t be out here with no wind forever, that's for sure.
314
00:24:53,825 --> 00:24:56,203
I can just see us floating the wrong way.
315
00:24:59,623 --> 00:25:00,206
No!
316
00:25:00,207 --> 00:25:02,667
Yeah, we're just drifting sideways.
317
00:25:12,969 --> 00:25:14,803
We’re wanting to go this way.
318
00:25:14,804 --> 00:25:15,722
Yeah.
319
00:25:17,098 --> 00:25:18,975
We want that way now.
320
00:25:21,728 --> 00:25:24,355
Oh we’re drift— Are we drifting that way?
321
00:25:24,356 --> 00:25:25,648
We're drifting that way.
322
00:25:25,649 --> 00:25:26,441
Fuck!
323
00:25:28,944 --> 00:25:33,198
♪ Drifting the wrong way…
–Drifting away! ♪
324
00:25:34,574 --> 00:25:37,536
Would that set us off, like, a few days or something?
325
00:25:37,744 --> 00:25:39,871
No, we're not moving that fast.
326
00:25:47,963 --> 00:25:49,339
Coming from there.
327
00:25:49,631 --> 00:25:51,174
It’s fucking with me.
328
00:25:52,425 --> 00:25:54,386
You feel it?
–Yeah.
329
00:26:36,928 --> 00:26:38,305
Urgh!
330
00:27:12,213 --> 00:27:12,755
I’m like
331
00:27:19,721 --> 00:27:21,263
It’s going to happen.
332
00:27:21,264 --> 00:27:22,766
It is going to happen.
333
00:27:24,976 --> 00:27:26,352
I can't look at you, but.
334
00:27:38,948 --> 00:27:40,533
I'm sorry. I did my best.
335
00:27:49,459 --> 00:27:51,378
Oh wow.
336
00:28:02,180 --> 00:28:03,222
Love you, Liz.
337
00:28:03,223 --> 00:28:04,724
Love you, Liz!
338
00:28:09,979 --> 00:28:10,979
Liz doesn’t know it yet
339
00:28:10,980 --> 00:28:13,400
but she's the protagonist of this movie.
340
00:28:22,659 --> 00:28:27,163
♪ I love to sing in the ocean!
341
00:28:28,373 --> 00:28:32,210
♪ No one can hear me way out here!
342
00:28:33,086 --> 00:28:37,215
♪ I'm just a lonely little sailor... ♪
343
00:29:02,574 --> 00:29:04,826
I try not to think ever
344
00:29:05,034 --> 00:29:07,536
about actual position.
345
00:29:07,537 --> 00:29:11,374
The fact that we're way, way, way in the middle of nowhere.
346
00:29:12,500 --> 00:29:15,502
I try not to think about the depth of the water,
347
00:29:15,503 --> 00:29:18,630
just because they show you the immense
348
00:29:18,631 --> 00:29:20,467
power of the ocean.
349
00:29:22,427 --> 00:29:24,845
I don't look at maps full scale
350
00:29:24,846 --> 00:29:26,472
because that shit’s scary.
351
00:29:29,184 --> 00:29:31,810
But to see the surface and to watch the ripples
352
00:29:31,811 --> 00:29:33,604
and watch how the waves change,
353
00:29:33,605 --> 00:29:35,397
especially as the wind starts to pick up.
354
00:29:35,398 --> 00:29:38,609
So you have a nice calm day and there's no whitecaps,
355
00:29:38,610 --> 00:29:41,612
and as soon as you see one, that feeling of change,
356
00:29:41,613 --> 00:29:43,281
it's very apparent.
357
00:29:51,623 --> 00:29:55,167
I think as humans, before we had speech, and
358
00:29:55,168 --> 00:29:58,045
that form of communication, everything was so visual,
359
00:29:58,046 --> 00:29:59,588
and that's how I feel like the ocean is,
360
00:29:59,589 --> 00:30:02,591
it's obvious, it's right there in front of you,
361
00:30:02,592 --> 00:30:07,054
and also the understanding that it's moving all the time.
362
00:30:07,055 --> 00:30:08,430
It feels like life.
363
00:30:08,431 --> 00:30:13,853
Like intense life and the flow of energy that we all experience
364
00:30:14,312 --> 00:30:16,939
through human relations or trying to
365
00:30:16,940 --> 00:30:19,942
to navigate our meaning.
366
00:30:19,943 --> 00:30:23,195
That flow of energy is, it's unstoppable.
367
00:30:23,196 --> 00:30:25,572
And we try to stop our own,
368
00:30:25,573 --> 00:30:28,450
I think sometimes or other people's,
369
00:30:28,451 --> 00:30:29,828
but we can't.
370
00:30:49,180 --> 00:30:50,223
No!
371
00:30:53,601 --> 00:30:55,435
It was kind of like a feeling of,
372
00:30:55,436 --> 00:30:57,855
oh, shit. Now it starts.
373
00:30:57,856 --> 00:31:00,858
I was somehow hoping that it wouldn't, but
374
00:31:00,859 --> 00:31:03,194
I knew that stuff was going to break.
375
00:31:05,071 --> 00:31:07,990
On day seven, the gaff broke.
376
00:31:07,991 --> 00:31:12,119
That makes the mainsail for the rig that Mara Noka has unusable.
377
00:31:12,120 --> 00:31:14,205
It's pretty fucked.
378
00:31:14,581 --> 00:31:18,584
The mainsail was modified specifically for the length of that gaff,
379
00:31:18,585 --> 00:31:21,378
so it needed to be extended
380
00:31:21,379 --> 00:31:23,673
to be able to pull the sail back up.
381
00:31:35,143 --> 00:31:37,936
I don't remember feeling at all like,
382
00:31:37,937 --> 00:31:39,062
“Why?!”
383
00:31:39,063 --> 00:31:40,689
Right away I felt like
384
00:31:40,690 --> 00:31:42,900
someone was going to know how to solve this.
385
00:31:42,901 --> 00:31:44,152
Obviously Kiana,
386
00:31:44,277 --> 00:31:47,614
and would give us the tasks to do,
387
00:31:47,739 --> 00:31:49,781
but I never doubted the situation,
388
00:31:49,782 --> 00:31:51,618
never felt fearful.
389
00:31:54,162 --> 00:31:56,580
I was struggling with that the whole time.
390
00:31:56,581 --> 00:32:00,083
I appreciate it, and I think it's beautiful and it's wonderful.
391
00:32:00,084 --> 00:32:03,545
But there was always the aspect of having other people around,
392
00:32:03,546 --> 00:32:06,381
and the reason I started sailing alone is
393
00:32:06,382 --> 00:32:08,885
because of my insecurity of
394
00:32:09,218 --> 00:32:12,472
being observed when I'm doing something wrong,
395
00:32:12,764 --> 00:32:15,767
because it becomes very apparent when you do something wrong,
396
00:32:15,934 --> 00:32:18,226
whether somebody else is there to pointed out or not.
397
00:32:18,227 --> 00:32:21,313
And I'm still learning.
398
00:32:21,314 --> 00:32:24,067
So to have people relying on me
399
00:32:24,317 --> 00:32:25,693
and looking at me for
400
00:32:26,736 --> 00:32:29,696
why or how or what, you know,
401
00:32:29,697 --> 00:32:31,239
I don’t have any practice in it,
402
00:32:31,240 --> 00:32:33,993
and it was just it was really new for me.
403
00:32:34,452 --> 00:32:35,954
How to make a movie:
404
00:32:37,121 --> 00:32:40,040
Go out on a wooden boat
405
00:32:40,041 --> 00:32:41,708
in the middle of the ocean.
406
00:32:41,709 --> 00:32:42,376
Wait.
407
00:32:42,377 --> 00:32:43,795
See what happens.
408
00:32:46,297 --> 00:32:48,883
It's kind of fun to break this
409
00:32:49,092 --> 00:32:52,094
relaxed rhythm we had at the retreat
410
00:32:52,095 --> 00:32:53,805
with a little bit of something.
411
00:32:53,930 --> 00:32:55,974
Yeah, this is definitely exciting.
412
00:33:07,485 --> 00:33:09,278
Ship, ship, ship, ship.
413
00:33:09,487 --> 00:33:11,280
This is sailing vessel
414
00:33:11,406 --> 00:33:14,534
to your forward port side.
415
00:33:15,368 --> 00:33:16,703
Do you copy? Over.
416
00:33:20,498 --> 00:33:22,834
Sailing Vessel, Cruise Ship. Go ahead.
417
00:33:25,795 --> 00:33:26,670
Hi cruise ship.
418
00:33:26,671 --> 00:33:31,551
We are on our way to Azores with an east heading.
419
00:33:32,176 --> 00:33:34,469
I was wondering if you could give me,
420
00:33:34,470 --> 00:33:37,974
uh, some weather forecast for the next couple of days.
421
00:33:38,766 --> 00:33:41,476
Yeah. Weather forecast for
422
00:33:41,477 --> 00:33:43,520
today and tomorrow.
423
00:33:43,521 --> 00:33:47,775
So you can expect southwest winds with gusts up to 35,
424
00:33:48,818 --> 00:33:51,278
35 to 40 knots in this area,
425
00:33:51,279 --> 00:33:54,281
and also waves around three meters,
426
00:33:54,282 --> 00:33:55,782
and second of all,
427
00:33:55,783 --> 00:33:58,786
you can also expect some passing rain showers tomorrow as well.
428
00:33:59,162 --> 00:34:00,370
Thank you sir.
429
00:34:00,371 --> 00:34:04,584
Okay. Welcome, have a good, pleasant and safe voyage.
430
00:34:05,293 --> 00:34:06,168
Yeah!
431
00:34:06,169 --> 00:34:08,086
We're going to get wind!
432
00:34:08,087 --> 00:34:10,298
Lots of it. That's kind of scary!
433
00:34:10,506 --> 00:34:11,466
How much?
434
00:34:11,758 --> 00:34:13,009
40 knots, 35, 40 knots.
435
00:34:13,676 --> 00:34:14,469
Oh my God.
436
00:34:14,844 --> 00:34:16,762
But, uh, only for the day tomorrow,
437
00:34:16,763 --> 00:34:19,222
and then it goes away by nighttime, gusting 15.
438
00:34:19,223 --> 00:34:20,474
40 knots?
439
00:34:20,475 --> 00:34:23,018
I'm not extremely excited I would say.
440
00:34:23,019 --> 00:34:27,732
Yeah I’m a little afraid.
- I would be fine without that experience.
441
00:34:29,859 --> 00:34:32,486
Like, this is 13 knots.
442
00:34:32,487 --> 00:34:35,198
So imagine 40. Like it's,
443
00:34:35,490 --> 00:34:36,698
that's a storm.
444
00:34:36,699 --> 00:34:38,618
Like that’s a gale.
445
00:34:39,160 --> 00:34:40,660
I don't know, but I'm imagining
446
00:34:40,661 --> 00:34:42,329
if we leave that up,
447
00:34:42,330 --> 00:34:44,831
it's going to rip the sail apart
448
00:34:44,832 --> 00:34:47,835
and that fork is going to...
449
00:34:48,920 --> 00:34:51,129
I think we're going to hopefully take it down.
450
00:34:51,130 --> 00:34:52,924
Yeah, that makes sense.
451
00:34:53,549 --> 00:34:55,884
Well, Kiana didn't seem too scared about it.
452
00:34:55,885 --> 00:34:57,010
She was excited.
453
00:34:57,011 --> 00:34:58,720
Yeah.
454
00:34:58,721 --> 00:35:01,098
She’s crazy.
455
00:35:01,099 --> 00:35:02,307
You’re going out to sea
456
00:35:02,308 --> 00:35:04,560
with a captain who’s not afraid of dying.
457
00:35:05,353 --> 00:35:06,979
Hand over hand.
458
00:35:10,233 --> 00:35:12,193
Stand, no.
459
00:35:13,778 --> 00:35:14,779
Yes.
460
00:35:59,490 --> 00:36:01,868
It’s a little intimidating.
461
00:36:02,451 --> 00:36:05,453
Being so close to the ocean, it feels like
462
00:36:05,454 --> 00:36:08,916
everything that's happening is not happening randomly,
463
00:36:09,959 --> 00:36:14,588
and that whole thing of just being humble to the elements
464
00:36:14,589 --> 00:36:18,091
also makes you more superstitious
465
00:36:18,092 --> 00:36:19,468
and makes you feel
466
00:36:19,635 --> 00:36:24,640
that whatever little sign of light in the clouds or whatever
467
00:36:24,974 --> 00:36:28,477
nice experience that the sea brings you, you deserve that.
468
00:36:52,710 --> 00:36:53,878
What are you doing?!
469
00:36:54,337 --> 00:36:55,838
Stop this witchcraft!
470
00:37:16,943 --> 00:37:19,153
Dude, I wonder if it's abandoned.
471
00:37:21,280 --> 00:37:24,157
Uh, whistle or, uh, the horn!
472
00:37:24,158 --> 00:37:26,285
There's a horn right there next to you.
473
00:37:36,754 --> 00:37:38,546
I'm only getting static from your end.
474
00:37:38,547 --> 00:37:40,007
Are you outside?
475
00:37:52,186 --> 00:37:53,688
I think it's abandoned.
476
00:37:55,231 --> 00:37:57,400
But we got static on the radio!
477
00:37:59,193 --> 00:38:00,194
That is true.
478
00:38:04,448 --> 00:38:06,993
Do you see anyone with binoculars?
479
00:38:08,160 --> 00:38:11,706
It was so frightening
480
00:38:12,331 --> 00:38:14,541
to be in the conditions that we were in,
481
00:38:14,542 --> 00:38:16,710
with such swell and still with wind,
482
00:38:16,711 --> 00:38:21,674
and this newfound sense of reality
483
00:38:22,133 --> 00:38:25,093
that what happened to them
484
00:38:25,094 --> 00:38:28,097
could happen to us, or worse?
485
00:38:29,598 --> 00:38:31,683
If you can come to the bow for proof of life,
486
00:38:31,684 --> 00:38:34,979
I'm not sure if radio signal is working.
487
00:38:43,946 --> 00:38:45,573
Oh shit, we already jibed,
488
00:38:45,906 --> 00:38:47,700
I need you to bring it around please.
489
00:38:49,452 --> 00:38:52,246
Did you get that interference on video?
490
00:38:52,621 --> 00:38:53,789
I don't know.
491
00:38:57,376 --> 00:38:59,961
That was fucking weird, though, to get the interference.
492
00:38:59,962 --> 00:39:01,172
That's so weird.
493
00:39:13,601 --> 00:39:15,727
It was a very scary feeling
494
00:39:15,728 --> 00:39:18,856
and we tried to get close, but we couldn't really with the waves.
495
00:39:19,148 --> 00:39:22,025
But leaving the boat, I think that was the most scary.
496
00:39:22,026 --> 00:39:24,153
Just like after that, thinking,
497
00:39:24,653 --> 00:39:26,821
I wonder what happened?
498
00:39:26,822 --> 00:39:28,782
Like, what's the story behind this boat?
499
00:39:28,783 --> 00:39:32,285
And just feeling helpless, like we couldn't do anything.
500
00:39:32,286 --> 00:39:37,791
And a feeling of wanting to alert somebody about this.
501
00:39:37,792 --> 00:39:41,378
And just thinking about all these different scenarios
502
00:39:41,379 --> 00:39:43,630
that could have happened and even thinking that
503
00:39:43,631 --> 00:39:47,050
what if somebody was on that boat and injured?
504
00:39:47,051 --> 00:39:50,554
Or what if this is somebody's father? Or,
505
00:39:51,097 --> 00:39:54,433
I don't know. Just a lot of feelings
and very strange to just
506
00:39:55,851 --> 00:39:59,563
be the only boat out there seeing this
and then just sailing away from it
507
00:39:59,980 --> 00:40:04,026
without doing anything,
without being able to do anything.
508
00:40:05,277 --> 00:40:08,071
It was kind of like a strange
509
00:40:08,072 --> 00:40:11,032
little ghost that just somehow
510
00:40:11,033 --> 00:40:14,662
poked on our shoulder saying, this is a possibility.
511
00:40:57,621 --> 00:41:01,417
I’ve been feeling kind of like shit for the past three days.
512
00:41:01,876 --> 00:41:04,085
And today I took a COVID test
513
00:41:04,086 --> 00:41:06,045
and I have COVID.
514
00:41:06,046 --> 00:41:07,882
I don't understand.
515
00:41:08,883 --> 00:41:10,926
But this is it.
516
00:41:21,687 --> 00:41:25,064
It just made me feel very uncomfortable in those days,
517
00:41:25,065 --> 00:41:28,067
because it made me feel more unsafe,
518
00:41:28,068 --> 00:41:31,489
because I couldn't really rely on my own strength.
519
00:41:56,639 --> 00:41:59,600
I was prepared to be seasick.
520
00:42:00,017 --> 00:42:03,186
Kiana said seasickness lasts 3 to 5 days,
and then you're cured.
521
00:42:03,187 --> 00:42:04,939
So don't worry about it.
522
00:42:05,940 --> 00:42:07,942
For me, it lasted the first two weeks.
523
00:42:09,026 --> 00:42:10,986
Being super sleepy
524
00:42:11,904 --> 00:42:13,905
and then puking every once in a while.
525
00:42:13,906 --> 00:42:16,115
You know, I took it as it came,
526
00:42:16,116 --> 00:42:19,661
and it did feel like I was this little baby,
527
00:42:19,662 --> 00:42:21,037
new to the world,
528
00:42:21,038 --> 00:42:23,957
like a newborn child being rocked to sleep
529
00:42:23,958 --> 00:42:26,334
by this big mama.
530
00:42:26,335 --> 00:42:30,046
I felt like I was being soothed into this new experience
531
00:42:30,047 --> 00:42:32,132
through a dreamlike state.
532
00:42:36,011 --> 00:42:37,470
It was very scary
533
00:42:37,471 --> 00:42:39,514
to have someone so sick on the boat,
534
00:42:39,515 --> 00:42:40,640
wasn't able to eat
535
00:42:40,641 --> 00:42:44,227
or drink water for so many days,
536
00:42:44,228 --> 00:42:46,145
and I had never seen that before.
537
00:42:46,146 --> 00:42:49,233
I experienced seasickness passing much more quickly.
538
00:42:51,527 --> 00:42:54,487
Made me very nervous
539
00:42:54,488 --> 00:42:57,491
in the responsibility of keeping two people
540
00:42:57,741 --> 00:42:59,660
healthy and alive.
541
00:43:14,425 --> 00:43:16,969
It’s not good if I’m throwing up all my water.
542
00:43:44,913 --> 00:43:46,623
A breeze started coming out of the east,
543
00:43:46,624 --> 00:43:49,626
which was the direction that we were heading in,
544
00:43:49,627 --> 00:43:53,755
and that could only mean in the Northern
hemisphere at that time of year,
545
00:43:53,756 --> 00:43:56,800
that there was a low pressure approaching from below us.
546
00:44:38,634 --> 00:44:41,095
I think it was about 5 a.m. in the morning.
547
00:44:44,473 --> 00:44:46,224
I think we had three-meter waves.
548
00:44:46,225 --> 00:44:48,185
It was raining. It was wet.
549
00:45:03,492 --> 00:45:04,367
Kiana!
550
00:45:04,368 --> 00:45:07,371
I saw that the forestay had popped.
551
00:45:18,090 --> 00:45:21,844
So the roller furler was just flapping around.
552
00:45:23,887 --> 00:45:26,931
Kiana quickly realized that the only way to get it down
553
00:45:26,932 --> 00:45:28,559
was to climb up the mast.
554
00:45:30,644 --> 00:45:33,187
I had to pull her up, the deck was so slippery.
555
00:45:33,188 --> 00:45:35,940
She just got the harness on and went up.
556
00:45:35,941 --> 00:45:38,568
I felt like I was going to pass out the whole time.
557
00:45:38,569 --> 00:45:40,027
I was sick.
558
00:45:40,028 --> 00:45:43,239
I felt even too weak to cry for help, and I also felt like
559
00:45:43,240 --> 00:45:46,243
there was no other option than to just do it.
560
00:47:00,234 --> 00:47:01,609
This morning too, when that happened,
561
00:47:01,610 --> 00:47:04,071
I'd been asleep for, like, 12 minutes,
562
00:47:05,781 --> 00:47:08,616
and the forestay was down like that.
563
00:47:08,617 --> 00:47:10,868
The drum on the thing
564
00:47:10,869 --> 00:47:12,120
and it came unlashed.
565
00:47:13,789 --> 00:47:15,165
Popped.
566
00:47:15,999 --> 00:47:19,752
Between the ass and the mast
I felt like I was just pulling on your skin.
567
00:47:19,753 --> 00:47:20,629
A little bit.
568
00:47:24,007 --> 00:47:26,425
Now I got to climb up there and tie it back on,
569
00:47:26,426 --> 00:47:28,469
and then eventually we’ll put sail back up...
570
00:47:28,470 --> 00:47:29,638
but not today.
571
00:47:29,930 --> 00:47:33,350
But I gotta put that up soon.
572
00:47:41,942 --> 00:47:44,569
For me, being inside
573
00:47:44,570 --> 00:47:49,115
that bunk there in the front was... uncomfortable.
574
00:47:49,116 --> 00:47:51,325
Not uncomfortable physically, mentally
575
00:47:51,326 --> 00:47:52,702
because it was—
576
00:47:52,703 --> 00:47:57,039
The sounds are just, they're very intense
in there because you're in the front,
577
00:47:57,040 --> 00:48:02,420
and the way we were sailing, the waves
would slam on the side of the hull
578
00:48:02,421 --> 00:48:03,337
so loud.
579
00:48:13,390 --> 00:48:14,224
Aaah!
580
00:48:23,525 --> 00:48:26,444
Also just getting used to what all the sounds are...
581
00:48:26,445 --> 00:48:30,031
but at no point did I really feel relaxed
582
00:48:30,032 --> 00:48:31,825
sleeping in that front bunk.
583
00:48:32,534 --> 00:48:34,911
I could only sleep if I put a podcast on
584
00:48:34,912 --> 00:48:38,915
or covered my ears completely with a blanket,
585
00:48:38,916 --> 00:48:41,834
because the sounds, they were just too dramatic,
586
00:48:41,835 --> 00:48:43,419
And I think it just for me,
587
00:48:43,420 --> 00:48:45,923
it invoked some sort of like survival instinct.
588
00:48:51,011 --> 00:48:52,219
I feel like
589
00:48:52,220 --> 00:48:55,140
we’re just so adaptable as humans and
590
00:48:55,307 --> 00:48:58,893
your level of comfort and discomfort
591
00:48:58,894 --> 00:49:02,230
or whatever that is, just gets pushed all the time.
592
00:49:02,940 --> 00:49:05,943
But there was also always some sort of comfort.
593
00:49:06,443 --> 00:49:09,947
I guess it is just that thing that nothing is forever.
594
00:49:30,175 --> 00:49:31,342
Ocean. Ocean. Ocean.
595
00:49:31,343 --> 00:49:33,177
This is sailing vessel Mara Noka.
596
00:49:33,178 --> 00:49:36,430
We would like to request a little bit less wind
597
00:49:36,431 --> 00:49:38,433
if possible, over.
598
00:49:42,479 --> 00:49:44,647
It doesn’t work.
599
00:49:44,648 --> 00:49:46,108
It’s broken.
600
00:49:46,441 --> 00:49:48,235
It's the salt. It got to it.
601
00:50:02,416 --> 00:50:03,583
It’s tied on.
602
00:50:05,836 --> 00:50:07,796
It's so close.
603
00:50:11,133 --> 00:50:13,510
It's like so close.
604
00:50:18,098 --> 00:50:20,308
I feel like I need a shower.
605
00:50:22,936 --> 00:50:26,773
I’ll pay whoever makes us orange juice 20 bucks.
606
00:51:09,483 --> 00:51:11,151
Let it go. Let it go some more.
607
00:51:32,255 --> 00:51:33,632
Leave a little slack.
608
00:51:37,719 --> 00:51:39,262
And dinner.
609
00:51:44,726 --> 00:51:46,853
Fucking huge wave!
610
00:51:51,399 --> 00:51:52,858
Rain before wind—?
611
00:51:52,859 --> 00:51:54,111
Settle in!
612
00:52:13,588 --> 00:52:14,840
Let me see.
613
00:52:15,757 --> 00:52:17,134
It’s just split.
614
00:52:17,884 --> 00:52:18,844
Ow!
615
00:52:21,972 --> 00:52:23,223
It's not that bad.
616
00:52:25,100 --> 00:52:26,935
A wave just hit
617
00:52:27,769 --> 00:52:30,105
and did this to us.
618
00:52:40,574 --> 00:52:43,201
Oh my God. Liz, what are you doing?
619
00:52:43,535 --> 00:52:46,121
Get down from there, Liz!
620
00:52:49,249 --> 00:52:51,710
Oh, she's hanging on for dear life.
621
00:53:09,144 --> 00:53:11,479
Oh, my God, you have Liz.
622
00:53:14,232 --> 00:53:16,151
It’s okay, Liz, you’re safe now.
623
00:53:16,318 --> 00:53:18,695
I might reef the mainsail.
624
00:53:19,154 --> 00:53:19,737
Yeah.
625
00:53:19,738 --> 00:53:21,740
Probably before this meal is over.
626
00:54:02,948 --> 00:54:06,116
Overnight, the wind started swinging,
627
00:54:06,117 --> 00:54:08,911
and we were able to sail downwind.
628
00:54:08,912 --> 00:54:10,454
In the middle of the night
629
00:54:10,455 --> 00:54:12,666
we were flying.
630
00:54:13,041 --> 00:54:15,085
Probably doing seven and a half knots.
631
00:54:15,418 --> 00:54:18,462
By first light, the wind really picked up.
632
00:54:18,463 --> 00:54:20,965
It was at its peak,
633
00:54:20,966 --> 00:54:23,885
so I knew that I needed to reef the sail.
634
00:54:42,862 --> 00:54:44,572
This bitch just went up.
635
00:54:44,698 --> 00:54:45,699
Huh?
636
00:54:46,950 --> 00:54:49,327
She just went up, yeah.
- She went up the mast?
637
00:54:59,170 --> 00:55:02,756
I attempted to reef it downwind,
638
00:55:02,757 --> 00:55:04,675
which usually works,
639
00:55:04,676 --> 00:55:07,387
but not at that wind speed.
640
00:55:08,054 --> 00:55:10,806
And the sail ended up getting caught,
641
00:55:10,807 --> 00:55:12,434
and I couldn't bring it down.
642
00:55:12,976 --> 00:55:17,689
It swung to the other side and tore.
643
00:55:21,026 --> 00:55:22,276
We should have taken it down.
644
00:55:22,277 --> 00:55:23,737
No, I should have
645
00:55:24,112 --> 00:55:25,654
done the taking it down differently.
646
00:55:25,655 --> 00:55:27,032
I should have waited.
647
00:55:28,658 --> 00:55:30,868
I should have done different things.
648
00:55:30,869 --> 00:55:32,329
But I wasn't thinking
649
00:55:32,954 --> 00:55:33,997
correctly.
650
00:55:34,914 --> 00:55:35,957
It’s okay.
651
00:55:39,210 --> 00:55:42,338
We were not able to stitch the sail,
652
00:55:42,339 --> 00:55:44,506
because to be able to stitch the sail properly,
653
00:55:44,507 --> 00:55:46,800
you need to put some kind of adhesive,
654
00:55:46,801 --> 00:55:50,346
and that was not going to be, possible
655
00:55:50,347 --> 00:55:52,515
in such conditions.
656
00:55:55,226 --> 00:55:56,519
Pray for what?
657
00:55:56,978 --> 00:55:58,313
I prayed for the forks.
658
00:55:58,938 --> 00:55:59,897
I know.
659
00:55:59,898 --> 00:56:03,526
Like us, the forks, the boom, the gaff, the sail.
—Now I'm nervous.
660
00:56:04,027 --> 00:56:04,986
Pruney.
661
00:56:15,413 --> 00:56:16,623
Eww
662
00:57:02,460 --> 00:57:04,628
♪ Rain, rain go away
663
00:57:04,629 --> 00:57:06,923
♪ come again another day ♪
664
00:57:15,640 --> 00:57:18,726
I just want to sleep.
665
00:57:35,493 --> 00:57:37,786
In that book there's this one part
666
00:57:37,787 --> 00:57:39,831
where he talks about
667
00:57:41,875 --> 00:57:43,626
his first storm,
668
00:57:44,085 --> 00:57:46,838
when he was a young merchant mariner,
669
00:57:47,213 --> 00:57:50,175
and he's talking about the different
captains he worked with,
670
00:57:51,009 --> 00:57:52,802
and they're in a storm, and
671
00:57:53,761 --> 00:57:56,764
they had like 70-foot seas.
672
00:57:57,849 --> 00:58:00,767
And the captain just stood there the whole time
673
00:58:00,768 --> 00:58:02,978
and never said a fucking word,
674
00:58:02,979 --> 00:58:05,063
and he would just smoke cigarettes and stand there.
675
00:58:05,064 --> 00:58:07,399
But he looked very calm,
676
00:58:07,400 --> 00:58:10,736
and anytime somebody would talk to him
or ask him something,
677
00:58:10,737 --> 00:58:12,654
he would just nod or shake his head.
678
00:58:12,655 --> 00:58:15,032
But he just stood there and stared out the window
679
00:58:15,033 --> 00:58:16,241
the whole time.
680
00:58:16,242 --> 00:58:18,869
And then the guy was like, uh,
681
00:58:18,870 --> 00:58:20,913
talking about how it made him calm
682
00:58:20,914 --> 00:58:23,290
because he knew that no matter what,
683
00:58:23,291 --> 00:58:25,043
they were going to survive.
684
00:58:25,543 --> 00:58:28,046
And I said, “I like that.”
685
00:58:29,380 --> 00:58:31,298
While I'm sitting there reading,
686
00:58:31,299 --> 00:58:33,218
smoking cigarettes, hiding.
687
00:58:37,096 --> 00:58:43,394
♪ I have no money, nor anything to give
688
00:58:43,895 --> 00:58:47,774
♪ The only thing I have is love to love
689
00:58:49,192 --> 00:58:51,610
♪ If that's how you want me
690
00:58:51,611 --> 00:58:53,821
♪ then I can love you
691
00:58:54,697 --> 00:58:58,701
♪ but if you can't, there's nothing to do ♪
692
00:59:38,199 --> 00:59:40,702
It's all been kind of like a test.
693
00:59:40,868 --> 00:59:41,869
Yeah,
694
00:59:42,245 --> 00:59:43,705
of what though?
695
00:59:44,372 --> 00:59:46,957
Patience and trust.
696
00:59:46,958 --> 00:59:48,459
Surrender.
697
00:59:48,626 --> 00:59:52,462
Discomfort. We're not in control here.
698
00:59:52,463 --> 00:59:54,132
She is.
699
00:59:54,882 --> 00:59:56,926
The ocean or Kiana?
700
00:59:57,385 --> 00:59:58,261
Both.
701
00:59:58,928 --> 01:00:01,097
No, the Ocean really...
702
01:00:11,024 --> 01:00:12,317
Oh my God.
703
01:00:17,488 --> 01:00:19,448
Might be a coping mechanism
704
01:00:19,449 --> 01:00:21,700
to joke around all the time, but
705
01:00:21,701 --> 01:00:24,328
there were a lot of moments of just comical relief
706
01:00:24,329 --> 01:00:27,748
or using humor to get through difficult situations,
707
01:00:27,749 --> 01:00:30,250
and that is something that I appreciate
708
01:00:30,251 --> 01:00:31,877
a lot about being around people
709
01:00:31,878 --> 01:00:35,256
that are so good and so resilient is
710
01:00:36,132 --> 01:00:39,260
it makes it easy to be stuck on a small boat
711
01:00:39,886 --> 01:00:40,928
with each other.
712
01:00:47,226 --> 01:00:48,770
It's so cool it's like,
713
01:00:48,895 --> 01:00:51,397
it's like the water is on fire
714
01:00:51,522 --> 01:00:54,442
and it’s all smoke, the clouds.
715
01:01:07,121 --> 01:01:09,082
I'm out of here. Ah!
716
01:01:21,177 --> 01:01:22,845
Where is that water coming from?
717
01:01:23,763 --> 01:01:26,766
Rain from God.
718
01:01:28,059 --> 01:01:30,144
Angel's tears.
719
01:01:36,359 --> 01:01:38,151
That's plastic
720
01:01:38,152 --> 01:01:39,612
right there.
721
01:01:40,613 --> 01:01:42,072
Basically, everywhere
722
01:01:42,073 --> 01:01:46,744
humans ingest enough microplastics
723
01:01:47,704 --> 01:01:51,290
that it's equal to one credit card a week.
724
01:01:52,375 --> 01:01:57,212
Microplastics act like a magnet to
all the pollutions that are in the water.
725
01:01:57,213 --> 01:02:00,298
So it's just floating around, like all this stuff
726
01:02:00,299 --> 01:02:02,134
that’s been banned since the 80s,
727
01:02:02,135 --> 01:02:05,304
and when it finds a piece of microplastic,
it's latches onto it.
728
01:02:05,930 --> 01:02:09,850
And that definitely
is not being like, going through our body.
729
01:02:09,851 --> 01:02:11,853
That's just staying there.
730
01:02:15,064 --> 01:02:16,857
So we're just ingesting it from what?
731
01:02:16,858 --> 01:02:18,024
Water—
732
01:02:18,025 --> 01:02:20,068
Water, food, everything.
733
01:02:20,069 --> 01:02:21,446
Yeah.
734
01:02:22,155 --> 01:02:23,864
Fish. Water. Food. Salt,
735
01:02:23,865 --> 01:02:25,240
sea salt.
736
01:02:25,241 --> 01:02:27,910
There's like little white flakes—
737
01:02:28,870 --> 01:02:30,621
Floating in my tea.
738
01:02:37,086 --> 01:02:38,587
After a full year
739
01:02:38,588 --> 01:02:41,715
or even almost two years of being naive
740
01:02:41,716 --> 01:02:44,551
and always having people tell me, ‘wow, you're so brave’,
741
01:02:44,552 --> 01:02:47,846
or ‘you guys are crazy’ or all these things, and I was like,
742
01:02:47,847 --> 01:02:50,391
I don't really know why everyone says that to me,
743
01:02:51,100 --> 01:02:54,895
and I never felt any of those things that people were talking about.
744
01:02:54,896 --> 01:02:58,064
Also, it was all the time an imaginary scenario
745
01:02:58,065 --> 01:02:59,649
crossing the Atlantic on this boat,
746
01:02:59,650 --> 01:03:02,986
and then suddenly you're actually leaving land on this boat,
747
01:03:02,987 --> 01:03:05,071
and then all of it just comes into your mind like,
748
01:03:05,072 --> 01:03:07,158
“Oh, shit, it's I guess, oh.”
749
01:03:10,328 --> 01:03:11,913
Might be a little crazy.
750
01:03:15,792 --> 01:03:16,918
Easy, right?
751
01:03:17,126 --> 01:03:18,335
It's just stressful.
752
01:03:18,336 --> 01:03:21,004
And we could have been way better prepared.
753
01:03:21,005 --> 01:03:24,383
I just didn't really expect it to be that strong.
754
01:03:25,676 --> 01:03:27,010
It's going to end when it's going to end.
755
01:03:27,011 --> 01:03:28,470
Like there’s nothing I can do about it,
756
01:03:28,471 --> 01:03:30,014
and it's going to end, and
757
01:03:30,973 --> 01:03:31,891
that's it.
758
01:03:32,433 --> 01:03:35,144
So all the shit in the world could break,
759
01:03:35,394 --> 01:03:37,938
and so long as this boat stays upright,
760
01:03:37,939 --> 01:03:39,273
we're fine.
761
01:03:51,285 --> 01:03:54,412
We have 12 days left
762
01:03:54,413 --> 01:03:57,874
of water on the port bow at one gallon
763
01:03:57,875 --> 01:03:59,627
per person.
764
01:04:37,915 --> 01:04:39,959
It’s caught! Behind you.
765
01:04:50,219 --> 01:04:51,846
That should never happen.
766
01:04:52,138 --> 01:04:53,431
Very dangerous.
767
01:04:53,890 --> 01:04:55,640
You didn't, you just didn't tell me
768
01:04:55,641 --> 01:04:57,267
to let this go.
769
01:04:57,268 --> 01:05:00,396
Yeah but you started pulling it, so I thought you had let it go.
770
01:05:01,230 --> 01:05:03,441
You have to let it go, then pull.
771
01:05:34,680 --> 01:05:38,183
It's funny how the mind just stays positive.
772
01:05:38,184 --> 01:05:39,851
Like I keep looking at the sky
773
01:05:39,852 --> 01:05:42,270
and whatever little something in the light, I’m like:
774
01:05:42,271 --> 01:05:45,982
“Oh looks like it's clearing up!”
775
01:05:45,983 --> 01:05:47,818
Chilled Wine...
776
01:05:49,320 --> 01:05:50,863
Congratulations.
777
01:05:51,739 --> 01:05:53,449
Thank you for
778
01:05:53,950 --> 01:05:55,325
getting us this far.
779
01:05:55,326 --> 01:05:58,287
Thanks for not falling overboard.
780
01:05:59,455 --> 01:06:02,083
We got drunk from drinking all that—
781
01:06:02,458 --> 01:06:06,045
Nobody needs to know that it costs $5.99.
782
01:06:06,337 --> 01:06:07,713
Three glasses.
783
01:06:16,305 --> 01:06:17,430
Half way!
784
01:06:17,431 --> 01:06:18,599
Half way.
785
01:06:23,354 --> 01:06:25,106
Over there is nice.
786
01:06:26,107 --> 01:06:27,858
Let’s go over there!
787
01:06:30,194 --> 01:06:32,947
Fuck it, let’s just go wherever it’s blue.
788
01:07:00,808 --> 01:07:04,311
I’ve got 37, 1, 6, 4, 58, 35 West.
789
01:08:03,245 --> 01:08:04,579
Ocean, ocean, ocean,
790
01:08:04,580 --> 01:08:08,250
this is sailing vessel Mara Noka in the center of you,
791
01:08:09,335 --> 01:08:12,754
requesting a little bit less wind, some sunshine
792
01:08:12,755 --> 01:08:15,257
and less swell. Over.
793
01:08:36,362 --> 01:08:37,696
It’s stuck.
794
01:08:38,030 --> 01:08:39,490
♪ Mr. Storm
795
01:08:40,324 --> 01:08:43,118
♪ you're never gonna break my heart! ♪
796
01:08:43,119 --> 01:08:44,119
Okay, it can stay like this…
797
01:08:44,120 --> 01:08:46,079
if you need to go downstairs, come take your pancakes.
798
01:08:46,080 --> 01:08:47,081
Yes!
799
01:09:06,851 --> 01:09:09,186
Sunshine!
800
01:09:23,242 --> 01:09:24,451
Ahhhh!
801
01:09:36,881 --> 01:09:37,840
Oh God.
802
01:09:39,008 --> 01:09:40,092
Woah.
803
01:09:44,346 --> 01:09:47,016
There’s so much happening.
804
01:09:49,101 --> 01:09:51,562
Woooo!
805
01:09:52,104 --> 01:09:53,147
Yeah!
806
01:09:53,731 --> 01:09:54,940
North Atlan—
807
01:09:57,735 --> 01:09:59,153
Urgh!
808
01:10:52,122 --> 01:10:54,207
I feel very rewarded
809
01:10:54,208 --> 01:10:57,461
for coming out of the other end of that storm.
810
01:10:57,753 --> 01:11:00,046
And the sun started to shine.
811
01:11:00,047 --> 01:11:02,090
And our spirits started to rise.
812
01:11:02,091 --> 01:11:04,008
And we were able to climb out of our
813
01:11:04,009 --> 01:11:06,219
little dark, wet holes
814
01:11:06,220 --> 01:11:11,600
and dry ourselves and dry our things and be able to
815
01:11:12,643 --> 01:11:15,687
connect again and return to community.
816
01:11:15,688 --> 01:11:19,900
Because I think in those days of tempest
817
01:11:20,359 --> 01:11:24,070
we had retreated into our own solitude
818
01:11:24,071 --> 01:11:27,408
to keep our own individual minds strong.
819
01:11:32,079 --> 01:11:33,913
It was
820
01:11:33,914 --> 01:11:38,418
truly a gift to have beautiful blue skies
821
01:11:38,419 --> 01:11:41,170
and beautiful sunsets and sunrises
822
01:11:41,171 --> 01:11:44,674
and the sun shining and wildlife around us
823
01:11:44,675 --> 01:11:47,678
beginning to show itself again.
824
01:11:47,845 --> 01:11:50,138
It was truly lovely.
825
01:11:52,349 --> 01:11:53,809
What kind of whale was that?
826
01:12:32,848 --> 01:12:34,224
So happy to see you.
827
01:12:34,600 --> 01:12:36,268
You getting a little sun?
828
01:13:42,376 --> 01:13:44,378
This is heaven.
829
01:13:46,422 --> 01:13:49,049
You appreciate the small things in life
830
01:13:49,258 --> 01:13:50,717
with this lifestyle.
831
01:13:51,802 --> 01:13:54,679
Like being able to wash yourself
832
01:13:54,680 --> 01:13:56,140
after three days
833
01:13:56,432 --> 01:13:57,975
of smelling like a shoe.
834
01:13:59,518 --> 01:14:00,519
Reel him in.
835
01:14:01,687 --> 01:14:03,104
Holy Mother.
—It’s a Mahi Mahi!
836
01:14:03,105 --> 01:14:05,690
Oh my God, oh my God.
—you are so pretty!
837
01:14:05,691 --> 01:14:06,858
This is so exciting.
838
01:14:06,859 --> 01:14:08,025
Please stay with us,
839
01:14:08,026 --> 01:14:10,111
Stay with us. Please, God.
840
01:14:10,112 --> 01:14:12,447
What?
841
01:14:12,448 --> 01:14:13,448
Oh my gosh.
842
01:14:13,449 --> 01:14:16,243
Oh my God! Oh my God!
843
01:14:23,459 --> 01:14:25,084
This is already
844
01:14:25,085 --> 01:14:26,712
harder to get out.
845
01:14:31,341 --> 01:14:32,592
Thank you.
846
01:14:32,593 --> 01:14:34,760
He was a very sweet fish.
847
01:14:34,761 --> 01:14:37,764
He had, like, a very calm personality.
848
01:14:40,267 --> 01:14:43,103
I think he sacrificed himself to us.
849
01:14:44,188 --> 01:14:45,522
He did.
850
01:14:50,152 --> 01:14:51,111
I'm sorry.
851
01:14:51,361 --> 01:14:54,405
I decided to not trawl for the fish for the first time
852
01:14:54,406 --> 01:14:55,990
and actually hold the lure,
853
01:14:55,991 --> 01:14:58,993
and after ten minutes,
854
01:14:58,994 --> 01:15:01,955
really thinking about today was the day
I was going to catch a fish,
855
01:15:02,372 --> 01:15:03,998
we caught this one,
856
01:15:03,999 --> 01:15:06,209
and it was pretty easy to pull in.
857
01:15:06,210 --> 01:15:07,960
For this gift from the ocean
858
01:15:07,961 --> 01:15:10,506
After 25 days.
859
01:15:11,256 --> 01:15:13,300
We’re going to eat every part of it.
860
01:15:13,425 --> 01:15:14,343
Yeah.
861
01:15:15,260 --> 01:15:16,886
Thank you Ocean.
862
01:15:16,887 --> 01:15:18,639
Thank you fishy.
- Thank you Mahi Mahi!
863
01:15:23,101 --> 01:15:24,811
There’s his heart.
864
01:15:27,606 --> 01:15:29,066
That’s the heart?
- Yeah.
865
01:15:42,079 --> 01:15:42,788
So good.
866
01:17:13,587 --> 01:17:16,214
It feels so natural.
867
01:17:16,423 --> 01:17:18,674
The loss of sense of time.
868
01:17:18,675 --> 01:17:20,302
It's totally non-linear.
869
01:17:21,303 --> 01:17:23,721
You just are. Every day.
870
01:17:23,722 --> 01:17:26,140
But what time is it? What do I need to do?
871
01:17:26,141 --> 01:17:28,643
Where do I need to go?
I need to meet somebody at 9 o’clock.
872
01:17:28,644 --> 01:17:30,646
It doesn't exist. There is no 9 o’clock.
873
01:17:33,357 --> 01:17:37,486
Wow, it's so beautiful!
874
01:17:37,736 --> 01:17:38,987
Swim under there.
875
01:18:43,635 --> 01:18:45,511
♪ Yes, Indeed, yes, indeed
876
01:18:45,512 --> 01:18:47,639
♪ you will have my love again ♪
877
01:18:52,811 --> 01:18:54,396
So what did we see today?
878
01:18:55,355 --> 01:18:56,732
We saw...
879
01:18:57,315 --> 01:18:59,275
I saw a food wrapper,
880
01:18:59,276 --> 01:19:02,654
and I saw some clear plastic
881
01:19:02,988 --> 01:19:06,074
and then I saw, I think a little yogurt cup,
882
01:19:06,908 --> 01:19:08,409
and then I saw a plastic bottle
883
01:19:08,410 --> 01:19:10,996
and actually, there was a plastic cup too.
884
01:19:51,536 --> 01:19:52,620
It’s pretty wild
885
01:19:52,621 --> 01:19:55,206
we still went that right direction
886
01:19:55,207 --> 01:19:56,792
with all the drifting.
887
01:19:57,167 --> 01:19:59,835
Where was the ghost ship? That was here?
- That was after...
888
01:19:59,836 --> 01:20:01,212
Because I remember you saying,
889
01:20:01,213 --> 01:20:02,922
“Look, we're doing pretty well.”
890
01:20:04,508 --> 01:20:07,052
♪ Dominican Bachata ♪
891
01:20:17,979 --> 01:20:19,940
Ay, José!
892
01:20:22,984 --> 01:20:23,859
Stop it!
893
01:20:23,860 --> 01:20:25,694
He's very skilled.
894
01:20:25,695 --> 01:20:27,531
I'm just learning the bachata.
895
01:20:46,049 --> 01:20:46,841
It’s so good.
896
01:20:46,842 --> 01:20:48,134
So good.
897
01:21:04,276 --> 01:21:05,569
All right.
898
01:21:06,319 --> 01:21:07,362
It's time.
899
01:21:15,245 --> 01:21:16,413
Almost there.
900
01:21:16,997 --> 01:21:19,541
Mackerel skies and mare’s tails
901
01:21:20,292 --> 01:21:24,337
make tall ships carry low sails.
902
01:21:24,880 --> 01:21:27,215
So that means we're gonna have wind?
903
01:21:45,984 --> 01:21:48,361
She really got up in my business.
904
01:21:48,695 --> 01:21:49,778
What's up baby?
905
01:21:49,779 --> 01:21:52,449
Wha—
Hi, it's good to see you.
906
01:21:58,747 --> 01:21:59,539
Yeah.
907
01:22:00,874 --> 01:22:01,749
Turn the light off,
908
01:22:01,750 --> 01:22:03,585
she’s trying to go to the light.
909
01:22:09,090 --> 01:22:12,093
It is a storm petrel.
910
01:22:12,969 --> 01:22:15,429
It would presumably indicate a breeding site
911
01:22:15,430 --> 01:22:17,724
in the general vicinity,
912
01:22:18,767 --> 01:22:19,808
meaning…
913
01:22:19,809 --> 01:22:23,063
We’re close to land.
- We're almost there.
914
01:22:23,730 --> 01:22:25,649
Dun-dun-dun.
915
01:23:15,907 --> 01:23:20,119
If you're doing something or participating in a life
916
01:23:20,120 --> 01:23:23,706
that maybe you shouldn't be or is not meant for you,
917
01:23:23,707 --> 01:23:25,959
there's a lot of ill feelings,
918
01:23:26,501 --> 01:23:27,293
depression,
919
01:23:28,712 --> 01:23:31,965
anger, anxiety, frustration,
920
01:23:32,507 --> 01:23:35,384
and it's not necessarily that there's something wrong with us.
921
01:23:35,385 --> 01:23:36,845
There's not.
922
01:23:38,263 --> 01:23:40,806
Feeling peace or feeling right.
923
01:23:40,807 --> 01:23:44,018
Having that complete knowledge that you're doing
924
01:23:44,019 --> 01:23:48,022
what you need to be doing is really incredible,
925
01:23:48,023 --> 01:23:51,108
and I think it involves trusting that,
926
01:23:51,109 --> 01:23:53,318
because how miserable would it be to
927
01:23:53,319 --> 01:23:56,780
just live your entire life feeling uncomfortable,
928
01:23:56,781 --> 01:23:59,409
feeling like there's something else out there
929
01:23:59,743 --> 01:24:02,745
but you're afraid to leave.
930
01:24:02,746 --> 01:24:05,748
Maybe a relationship or a job or
931
01:24:05,749 --> 01:24:07,459
your home town.
932
01:24:09,044 --> 01:24:11,670
A false sense of comfort,
933
01:24:11,671 --> 01:24:14,758
because the unknown is scary,
934
01:24:15,383 --> 01:24:17,676
but it's not scary anymore.
935
01:24:17,677 --> 01:24:20,930
As soon as you let it go, as soon as you dive in,
936
01:24:21,181 --> 01:24:22,724
it's not scary.
937
01:24:23,516 --> 01:24:25,184
I never felt afraid.
938
01:24:25,185 --> 01:24:28,188
Sometimes I felt worried, but I never felt afraid.
939
01:24:29,564 --> 01:24:32,566
Just because you're fighting for your life,
940
01:24:32,567 --> 01:24:34,527
but in a positive way,
941
01:24:34,903 --> 01:24:37,654
in an intrinsic human animal way,
942
01:24:37,655 --> 01:24:39,573
surpassing fear
943
01:24:39,574 --> 01:24:42,451
and understanding that fear is not fear.
944
01:24:42,452 --> 01:24:45,913
It's a mourning more of the idea
945
01:24:45,914 --> 01:24:49,084
of letting go of what you know, and
946
01:24:49,959 --> 01:24:51,293
that as soon as you do,
947
01:24:51,294 --> 01:24:53,295
there's a whole other experience out there
948
01:24:53,296 --> 01:24:56,131
that you can experience until you feel that feeling again,
949
01:24:56,132 --> 01:24:57,926
and then you let go of that one.
950
01:24:59,803 --> 01:25:01,679
I think it's so important.
951
01:25:03,264 --> 01:25:05,433
To just trust yourself.
952
01:25:07,685 --> 01:25:09,145
All the time.
953
01:25:10,605 --> 01:25:11,772
Don't waste time, you know.
954
01:25:11,773 --> 01:25:14,776
Don't waste time on what you think should be,
955
01:25:15,693 --> 01:25:19,322
and just go for what you feel should be.
956
01:25:31,709 --> 01:25:35,130
Oh my God!
957
01:25:45,765 --> 01:25:47,850
My father, who’s a sailor,
958
01:25:47,851 --> 01:25:52,104
he told me once that he loves to watch
959
01:25:52,105 --> 01:25:56,067
the big waves crash onto shore and that impact,
960
01:25:56,401 --> 01:25:57,860
and I asked him why.
961
01:25:57,861 --> 01:26:00,904
And he told me that those waves,
962
01:26:00,905 --> 01:26:03,031
they travel so far, and
963
01:26:03,032 --> 01:26:05,910
they've been through so many different things that
964
01:26:06,119 --> 01:26:07,912
make them into what they are,
965
01:26:08,079 --> 01:26:10,248
and then once they hit shore,
966
01:26:10,415 --> 01:26:12,584
that whole journey ends,
967
01:26:13,251 --> 01:26:15,377
and there is just something beautiful
968
01:26:15,378 --> 01:26:18,463
and something kind of brutal in that water
969
01:26:18,464 --> 01:26:20,382
having been able to move,
970
01:26:20,383 --> 01:26:22,343
having been able to transform.
971
01:26:23,052 --> 01:26:24,553
The journey ends
972
01:26:24,554 --> 01:26:27,681
but then that water returns to the ocean
973
01:26:27,682 --> 01:26:29,558
and it becomes something else,
974
01:26:29,559 --> 01:26:31,393
and it goes on another journey
975
01:26:31,394 --> 01:26:33,855
and it transforms in another way.
976
01:27:33,915 --> 01:27:35,916
I felt slightly excited to see land,
977
01:27:35,917 --> 01:27:37,584
but not at all in the way
978
01:27:37,585 --> 01:27:39,545
that I would have imagined
979
01:27:40,213 --> 01:27:43,216
one week into the journey at all.
980
01:27:43,466 --> 01:27:47,636
Like it felt like the ocean, the boat, the sailing
981
01:27:47,637 --> 01:27:51,223
was suddenly the home and the familiar world
982
01:27:51,224 --> 01:27:53,100
and the comfort zone,
983
01:27:53,101 --> 01:27:56,104
and then looking at land seemed intimidating.
984
01:27:59,315 --> 01:28:02,317
I did not want at all to land there.
985
01:28:02,318 --> 01:28:04,236
I was so kind of,
986
01:28:04,237 --> 01:28:05,404
it was kind of sad
987
01:28:05,405 --> 01:28:08,615
that we were in this magical container of like,
988
01:28:08,616 --> 01:28:12,370
just being in presence.
989
01:28:15,164 --> 01:28:18,041
This whole experience feels like this beautiful lesson,
990
01:28:18,042 --> 01:28:21,879
and it felt like we had to go through challenges
991
01:28:22,005 --> 01:28:24,673
She just died.
- Almost made it to Portugal.
992
01:28:24,674 --> 01:28:27,635
that the ocean brought to us, but almost as if
993
01:28:27,969 --> 01:28:30,512
the ocean was like looking at us
994
01:28:30,513 --> 01:28:32,307
and being like, I'm going to just
995
01:28:32,890 --> 01:28:35,142
test them out, see how they do,
996
01:28:35,143 --> 01:28:37,644
and then we got through it
997
01:28:37,645 --> 01:28:38,521
and then,
998
01:28:38,855 --> 01:28:41,773
the reward was just so much beauty,
999
01:28:41,774 --> 01:28:44,819
and to me, it felt like we went into another dimension,
1000
01:28:44,986 --> 01:28:47,697
and then suddenly the ocean
1001
01:28:47,947 --> 01:28:50,366
being this intimidating
1002
01:28:51,159 --> 01:28:53,702
thing that you always were slightly
1003
01:28:53,703 --> 01:28:56,372
anxious about, what was going to bring,
1004
01:28:56,873 --> 01:28:59,958
suddenly just felt like like a paradise
1005
01:28:59,959 --> 01:29:02,962
of sea life.
1006
01:29:05,798 --> 01:29:07,049
In my soul,
1007
01:29:07,050 --> 01:29:09,343
inside of me, this experience is
1008
01:29:09,344 --> 01:29:11,636
like a massive moving thing,
1009
01:29:11,637 --> 01:29:13,264
so I don’t know.
1010
01:29:16,309 --> 01:29:18,185
I feel like after this,
1011
01:29:18,186 --> 01:29:20,980
I trust myself
1012
01:29:21,522 --> 01:29:23,398
in a level that I never did
1013
01:29:23,399 --> 01:29:26,819
because I know that I can go through hardship
1014
01:29:26,986 --> 01:29:30,114
and uncomfortable situations
1015
01:29:30,406 --> 01:29:32,366
like seasickness for two weeks
1016
01:29:32,367 --> 01:29:34,451
and still have like high spirits
1017
01:29:34,452 --> 01:29:37,079
and not complain about it because I can’t–
1018
01:29:37,080 --> 01:29:39,581
like, how can I complain about something so small
1019
01:29:39,582 --> 01:29:42,710
when I've experienced something so immense around me?
1020
01:29:44,754 --> 01:29:47,632
I saw myself in a new light.
1021
01:29:47,757 --> 01:29:50,092
I've never been in those kinds of experiences
1022
01:29:50,093 --> 01:29:52,928
where I'm like, really able to see how strong I am.
1023
01:29:52,929 --> 01:29:57,724
And not just strong physically,
1024
01:29:57,725 --> 01:30:00,728
but on the mental and emotional side too.
1025
01:30:09,278 --> 01:30:10,612
The ocean,
1026
01:30:10,613 --> 01:30:14,574
the earth, the animals, the wind, the sun,
1027
01:30:14,575 --> 01:30:16,160
that's real.
1028
01:30:17,078 --> 01:30:19,038
The more in tune you become
1029
01:30:19,414 --> 01:30:23,793
with yourself and your abilities to create
1030
01:30:25,545 --> 01:30:29,131
a life or to imagine
1031
01:30:29,132 --> 01:30:32,135
it become reality, to manifest, to
1032
01:30:32,927 --> 01:30:35,178
to fight that fear, to put the fear aside,
1033
01:30:35,179 --> 01:30:36,888
and really go for it
1034
01:30:36,889 --> 01:30:38,599
the more
1035
01:30:39,642 --> 01:30:42,395
you become connected to the whole.
71237
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