Original subtitles

Ooh, are all the sandwiches named after celebrities?

Just about.

Oh, this Ed Sullivan sounds good, corned beef

and turkey on pumpernickel.

Milton Berle, Nova Scotia salmon on cream cheese.

What are you, ham on tongue?

No, for your information, young lady,

I am Swiss cheese and sliced chicken on an onion roll.

Right there.

Oh, you sound delicious.

I think I'll have you.

Honey, you already have me.

With mustard.

Are you going to have you too?

No, no, I don't think so.

Matter of fact, I haven't got much of an appetite.

I think I'll just have some tea and toast.

Well what's the matter, darling?

Are you a little nervous about your opening tonight?

Nervous?

No, I'm not nervous at all.

Why should I be nervous?

Well, honey, it's understandable.

You're bound to be a little tense.

Come on.

You talk like this is the first time I'm

playing the Copa or something.

I'm not at all nervous.

I, just as far back as I can remember,

I just never would eat before a first show like that.

Why?

Don't you get hungry?

Of course I get hungry, honey.

But I-- look, I been doing it this ways for years.

Why should I change now?

I don't want to jinx myself .

Why, Danny Williams , you're superstitious.

I'm not superstitious, honey.

With me It's kind of a tradition.

that's all .

I just never eat a heavy meal before my opening show.

Superstitious, I haven't got a superstitious bone in my body.

Well, are you folks ready to order?

Oh no.

Danny, what's the matter?

Get out of here, Schultz.

Is that Danny Williams?

Yes.

I'm sorry, Mr Williams.

I didn't know it was you.

Well now you know.

So Go away, huh?

I'll get another waiter.

Wait a minute. Come back.

Kathy, will you let him go?

Why do we have to have another waiter?

Holy Toledo.

It's his opening night, Miss.

And it wouldn't be right for me to serve him.

It's all right, Mr Williams.

I'm going now.

All right, go.

I'm sorry, Miss.

I, I don't worry--

Will you come out from under that table

and tell me what this is all about?

Why do we have to get another waiter?

Of all the places for us to sit.

Honey, that's Evil Eye Schultz.

Who is Evil Eye Schultz.

That waiter.

He's Evil Eye Schultz.

He's a legend on Broadway.

He's a jinx.

He's got an evil eye.

Oh, come on now.

Ask anybody and they'll tell you.

The surest way to kill your act is

to have Evil Eye Schultz look on you on the day you open.

Oh.

You're a cinch to flop.

Guaranteed flop.

It's not his fault, Honey. He's a jinx.

That's all. He's and evil eye.

He can't help it.

Oh that's the most ridiculous nonsense I ever heard.

Nothing ridiculous about it at all.

I've heard the story from 100 different guys.

They're getting a show ready, or an act for a night club.

Evil Eye Schultz waits on them their opening day.

And that night, pow, they are deader than a mackerel.

Oh, Danny, I'm surprised at you,

that you could actually believe in an evil eye.

Honey, facts are facts.

Oh I know, darling.

But if he's such a jinx, why doesn't the manager fire him?

Oh, they did, and the next day all the cheesecake curdled.

Now don't try to get out of this by telling jokes.

Let's forget it.

Now order your lunch.

Danny, if you're so superstitious,

why did we come here in the first place?

Honey, I'm not superstitious.

It's a tradition.

That's all.

It's traditional with me.

I come to Lindy's and have tea and toast

before I open at the Copa.

Oh, you're not superstitious, not much.

I'm not.

Oh, Danny, Danny, Danny, I'm sorry about what happened.

Will you watch that, Charlie.

I just wasn't thinking. That's all.

It was too--

That poor little man.

How can you treat him like that. -Forget it, Honey.

I'll take the order myself. I'll take it.

She'll have the Danny Williams.

I will not.

I'll have the Arthur Godfrey.

But don't smile.

You gotta be frightened.

That's the big bad wolf.

And you're Little Red Riding Hood.

Now come on. Be scared.

You're scared.

And you say, my, what big teeth you have, Grandma.

Come on.

My, what big teeth you have, Grandma.

Good.

Come on, Mr. Wolf, answer.

All the better to eat you with, my dear.

Oh brother, is this corny.

It wasn't so corny a couple of years ago, smart aleck.

Now put down the comic book and be cooperative.

Now Linda's got the lead in the kindergarten play tomorrow.

She's entitled to some cooperation from her family.

So answer on cue.

Now remember, you're the big bad wolf.

Come on, look menacing.

You're going to eat her for lunch.

But I already had lunch.

Will you stop being such a wise guy?

Besides, I'm not old enough to be a wolf.

Give me a few more years and you'll really see something.

Are you sure that's a comic book you're reading?

All right, cut it out, huh.

Aw gee, Daddy.

All the kids are waiting for me to play football.

Do me a favor.

Go play football and I'll play the wolf myself.

Go on.

Get out of here.

I can play it real good.

I didn't have much lunch.

OK, sweetheart, go ahead.

My, what a big nose you have, Grandma.

Teeth, not nose, teeth.

Now try it again.

Now who can that be?

Danny, was that the doorbell?

No, no, no.

It's-- it's-- it's a wrong number.

It was not a wrong number.

It was Mr Schultz.

And you know it, and I know it too because I invited him here.

What?

You invited Evil Eye Schultz to our house on my opening day?

Danny, would you please stop talking

like a superstitious character out of the Middle Ages

and get away from that door.

I am not superstitious.

Oh no, not much you aren't.

You think I am?

Go ahead.

Let him in.

What do I care?

Let him in.

All right.

Tell him I went for a walk.

Oh.

Hello, Mr Schultz, come right in.

Hello, Mrs. Williams.

Gee, I certainly appreciate what you're doing for me.

Oh.

And who have we here, Little Red Riding Hood?

Oh yes she is, in her school play.

This is my daughter, Linda.

Linda, this is Mr Schultz.

Hello, Mr. Schultz.

-Hello, Linda. -Mommy.

Yes.

Can I go and show Marsha my costume?

Of course, darling.

Run right along.

Bye.

Bye.

Where's Mr. Williams?

Oh he went for a walk in the closet.

I see.

I guess I was wrong in coming.

No.

I'd better go.

No, no, you're going to stay right here.

Danny, are you going to talk to Mr Schultz?

Sure, goodbye Mr. Schultz.

Danny, will you please come out of that closet?

All right, but tell him to turn and face the wall.

Oh now really, Danny.

I don't want him to jinx me.

It's all right.

I don't mind.

I'm used to it.

You can come out now, Mr. Williams.

Are you facing the wall?

Yeah, I'm facing the wall.

We'll probably have a jinxed wall.

But better the wall than me.

Do you have to look at our clock?

It's expensive.

Probably stop running.

Stop that this minute.

Now sit down, Mr. Schultz.

Thanks.

OK, Evil Eye, what did you want to see me about.

About being an evil eye.

What about it?

It's a terrible thing to be an evil eye.

People are afraid of you.

They don't like you.

And the worst thing is you're all alone.

There aren't enough evil eyes around

to even form a social club.

Isn't that awful, Danny?

You don't know.

I wouldn't mind it so much if it was just in my work.

But it's my whole life.

Oh, you poor thing.

I meet a girl.

I fall in love.

I think maybe I'll get married, have children.

And sooner or later she hears I'm an evil eye.

And what woman wants an evil eye for the father of her children?

Junior monster she might have.

So I thought, Danny Williams is opening tonight at the Copa.

If he lets me come to his opening

and sit right up front so everybody knows I'm there,

and if he's a big hit anyway, like he always is,

then people would say Schultz isn't an evil eye after all.

You're not an evil eye.

And that's a wonderful idea you have there.

It was yours.

Remember?

What?

Well anyway, you're going to be my escort tonight.

And you're going to sit right at the table with me.

Over my dead body.

Danny, will you stop being so ridiculous.

This evil eye business is utter nonsense.

Uh huh.

Ask him about Hurkey O'Toole.

What about Hurkey O'Toole?

Now who is Hurkey O'Toole.

See you've never heard of him.

And neither has anybody else.

Not since that fatal day that Hurkey O'Toole made

the sad mistake of eating a corned beef sandwich

served by one Evil Eye Schultz at Lindy's on the day

that Hurkey was going to open at the Martinique.

Oh, I bet there isn't a word of truth in that story.

I bet he never even served him a corned beef sandwich.

Of course, not.

See.

It was pastrami.

And I begged him not to eat it.

It was too heavy before an opening with all the tension.

I don't care.

I don't care.

I'd like to help you out, Evil Eye, but not today.

I'm opening tonight at the Copa, Evil Eye.

Oh Danny, I'm ashamed of you.

Please, Mrs. Williams.

I don't want to cause any trouble.

It's better I go.

I'm awfully sorry Mr. Schultz.

Thanks for trying to help.

He gone?

Oh.

Lover, lover, is it my fault that he's a jinx.

He's not a jinx.

He's a scapegoat.

A performer flops, but he won't admit

that it's his own fault. No, he has

to blame it on somebody else.

So he starts a legend about Evil Eye Schultz for an excuse.

The idea of blaming that poor man

for everybody else's favors.

I bet he didn't wait on half the people who claim he did.

Oh, come on.

He waited on them all right.

They'd certainly remember who waited on them.

Oh, is that so?

Of course that's so.

All right, last night, we had dinner at the Pen and Pencil.

Who was our waiter?

Mm.

Last night, what did our waiter look like?

Last night?

Yes, what did you look like we look.

Yes, was he bald?

Was he fat? Was he tall?

Was he Skinny? -Our waiter.

Oh, I said give me a chance.

I got a picture that in my mind.

All right, what did he look like?

He was bad.

Because it just so happens we had a waitress.

What do you know, a bald-headed waitress.

Yes, and that was just last night.

And you say everybody remembers.

Why that poor little man is the innocent victim

of a real social injustice.

And Danny, you've just got to go down to Lindy's and tell him

that you're going to help him.

This is my opening day!

But, honey, you've got to go. Now come on.

-But sweetheart, wait a minute. -Come on, Danny.

Wait a minute!

Whose side are you on, his or mine?

Now what kind of a question is that?

Well who are you worried about?

Well, darling, naturally I'm worried about you.

I hate to see the kind, sweet, thoughtful

man I married turn into a superstitious ignorant witch

burner.

Come on.

You'll help him.

I know you will.

Oh, you don't have to do it for him.

And you don't have to do it for yourself.

But do it for me, honey.

Come on.

Well, if you put it that way.

Oh, there, now you're talking like the man I love.

Oh but, honey, you better hurry up.

He might be gone, you know.

Now you better hurry.

Go on, darling.

Get-- but, honey, you've got to hurry.

Now wait a minute.

But there's no--

Wait, just, I want to see something.

Jeepers creepers.

It's still running.

I'll take a chance.

Hello, Evil Eye.

Bring me some cheesecake.

But Mr. Williams, it's your opening tonight

and you have a wife and children.

I know I have a wife and children.

We're going to put an end to this jinx nonsense

so you can have a wife and children.

So come on.

Mr. Williams, you sure you really want

me to serve your cheesecake?

Of course I'm sure.

Not only that, I want you to come to my opening tonight.

Sit at the ringside with my wife where everybody can

see you while I'm performing.

Mr. Williams--

We are going to show them that we are

civilized intelligent people who do

not believe in this medieval superstitions nonsense.

Now don't worry about it.

You just be there.

Gee, Mr. Williams, what can I ever to do to repay you?

You could bring me some cheesecake.

Are you sure you want me to serve you?

Don't worry about it, Schultz.

I'm telling you, everything's going to be all right.

Nothing's going to happen.

Yes, sir.

Thank you.

And such was the humor in my neighborhood.

I mean people from all nationalities of the world,

we had a regular like a small United Nations.

And we, nobody made too much money.

And we shared the food.

It was most common to see on one table

Hungarian goulash, Polish sausage,

and Lebanese meat pies.

And another neighbor would bring the bicarbonate.

People lived together.

They enjoyed each other.

Each contributing the color, the customs,

and the superstitions of their homelands,

especially the superstitions.

Boy we had some beauts in our neighborhood.

I remember my mother, God rest her soul,

my mother had a superstition, a gillion of them.

She had one where if there was anybody sick

in the neighborhood she'd make us wear a piece of garlic

around our necks in a little sack.

You know, you'd have to wear a piece of garlic.

She said it's guaranteed to keep the doctor away.

And it did too.

Also kept away the milkman, the mailman, the .

Nobody came near us.

My mother, she also had another superstition.

She always said to us kids, when you hear an ambulance

go by rub your head 50 times.

When my brother Bill was eight years old, he was bald headed.

She was loaded with superstitions.

I remember one time in 1935.

This is a true story.

In 1935 my brother Tom wanted to own a Cadillac.

But we were poor people.

Where could he own a Cadillac back in 1935?

It was ambition that he just had to own a Cadillac.

And my mother gave my rabbit's foot to carry in his pocket.

She said it'll bring you luck, my boy.

It's fantastic, unbelievable, but you know what came to pass?

It brought him luck.

Yesterday my brother Tom bought a 1935 Cadillac.

You don't believe that?

Oh, she was loaded with them.

My mother believed in a rabbit's foot.

But better than a rabbits foot, she believed in horseshoes.

And this, I gotta tell you, I had an experience with myself.

And I know it's true.

My mother used to have a horseshoe

over every door in our house.

And she said it bring you lots of luck.

And she convinced me because when I was a kid

we had a very important oral test at school

and I just jammed my pants pockets with horseshoes.

I had for horseshoes, one on each pocket.

And I went to school.

You don't think it brought me luck?

My luck, the teach asked the only question on the whole test

that I could answer.

But when I stood up to answer, my pants fell down.

My sister used to complain.

We were poor people.

Like I told you, we were living in a cheap flat,

you know, a cold water flat.

And my sister complained that's why she couldn't get a fellow.

Because we lived in such a cheap neighborhood, in a cheap flat.

She kept complaining.

She was always crying, I'll never

get married out of his house.

I'll never get married out of this house.

Why can't we get a more expensive apartment?

My mother said to her, carry a potato in your purse

all the time.

You'll have luck.

For one year my sister carried a potato in her purse.

And I know you don't believe this either.

But one year later, to the day, on a Sunday morning,

my mother woke my sister up and she said, sweetheart,

I got wonderful news for you.

We are now living in a more expensive apartment.

The landlord just raised the rent.

Listen, I am making light of superstitions,

ladies and gentleman, for kind of a private reason.

Because they are really silly.

So let's forget all about superstitions.

Let's sing a song.

Earl, let's go.

(SINGING) I'm looking over a four-leaf clover

that I overlooked before.

The first is for sunshine.

Second for rain.

Third for the roses that bloom in the lane.

And there's no need explaining oh the one

remaining is somebody I adore.

Oh, I'm looking over a four-leaf clover

that I overlooked before.

Oh I overlooked before.

This one is fine too in The Post.

Danny Williams colossal in his Copa opening last night.

News is great.

And so is The Mirror.

And so is the Tribune.

I don't remember ever getting rave reviews like this.

Mr. Schultz, you're a disgrace to the evil eyes of the world.

She's right, Evil Eye.

In that case, could you please do me a favor?

What's that?

Would you please not call me Evil Eye?

Why don't you call me by my first name?

You know, I never did know it.

What is it?

Well that's easy.

It's-- it's-- it's Oscar.

Oscar.

Oscar?

OK, Evil Eye, from now on it's Oscar.

I don't know how to thank you people.

Ah.

You've been so wonderful.

You can thank me real easy.

Stand up.

I'll show you how to thank me.

Look me right in the eye.

Come on.

Well it's been so long.

I've gotten out of the habit.

Practice, get back into the habit.

Look people in the eye.

I'm afraid to look at people.

I don't want to hurt anybody.

We know that.

But that's what made people believe the story about you.

It made you look shifty and evasive.

That's right.

But from now on you're going to look people

straight in the eye with your head high and your shoulders

back.

Come on.

Right in the eye.

Head high, shoulders back.

You know that hurts.

That's just because you're not used to it.

Sure, that's all.

You look like a new man already.

And I feel like a new man.

Oh it's wonderful not to be an evil eye anymore.

Of course, you, you're not an evil eye and you never were.

Mommy, Mommy!

Oh Linda, darling, what happened, honey.

Everybody laughed at me.

What?

Who laughed at you, sweetheart?

I forgot all my lines, and everybody laughed at me.

And I dropped the basket and all the things fell out.

Oh, honey.

You forgot all your lines in the school play

and you dropped the basket?

Aw.

Everything went wrong for her, poor kid.

It was like she was jinxed.

Danny, come out of that closet.

It was just a coincidence that everything

went wrong in Linda's play.

Now come on, Danny.

Please, please, don't help me.

If a man is ever going to learn to stand up straight,

sooner or later he's got to do it by himself.

Please.

You might as well come out, Mr. Williams.

I can stay out here much longer than you

can stay in that closet.

When And I'm not going to leave until I talk to you.

Come here, Linda.

I want to ask you something, dear.

All right?

Linda, you said when you got on the stage

that you forgot all your lines.

Did you know them before the play?

Well didn't you study them last night like I told you to?

Did you?

I watched television instead.

I see.

And when you dropped the basked?

I dropped it because the handle was broken.

The handle was broken?

I broke it last night.

I forgot to tell the teacher.

I see.

So the bad things that happened to you were your own fault,

not anybody else's.

Isn't that right?

I guess so.

I know so.

You see, Mr Williams, some of the bad things

that happen to us are our own fault. I know.

Bad things happened to me because I wasn't man

enough to stand up straight.

But that was yesterday.

Today is another day.

Evil Eye, uh-- uh, Oscar, I just

want to say I'm ashamed of myself and I apologize.

That's all right.

Like I said, that was yesterday.

And now I see by your clock, which by the way,

is still running, that I still have

time to call on a young girl I've

wanted to see for some time.

I want to thank you both very much.

Because of you, I can now walk with my head

high and my shoulders back.

It still hurts.

You know, Clancy, if we don't do another thing,

we've done our good deed for the year.

And to think you actually thought that sweet kind

little man could bring anybody bad luck or jinx anything

just by looking at it.

Sweetheart, do me a favor.

Let's not ever say the word jinx again in this house.

Because there's no such thing.