Original subtitles

MAN: Previously on Rescue Me...

I've been a part of a lot of interventions.

Okay? They're never easy.

Some people get extremely defensive and even violent.

Shit!

| can't go back to rehab! It doesn't work for me!

| mean, shit, we got enough drunks in this room to start our own meetings.

Sheila gave us half a million bucks, okay?

-What? -You never wanted that baby.

-Don't you put it back on me. -You're crazy. You sold my baby!

You're the one who told me to go see her. Okay?

We just agreed honesty’'s the best policy, right?

| was wrong.

-Baby, don't. -No, no, no.

| am not your baby anymore.

I'm gonna take a long walk. You be gone when | get back.

-(Grunts) -Hey.

(Both Moan)

Oh, wow. Ah.

You don't think I'm being too forward, do you?

No, no. I'd have to be insane to think that.

And you want me, don't you?

Yeah, yeah. Oh. Wow. Cool.

-Hi. -Hi, Auntie Sheila.

My dad and me, we wanted to see how the baby was doing.

Oh, say hi to your sister. Yeah.

Okay, I'm gonna be right back.

In the car. In the car. In the car, sweetie.

Close the door. Close the door. Good, good, good. Okay.

-Oh, shit! -No, no, no, no, no, no!

No! What are you doing?

He hates you!

Eh, | mean,

Eh, | mean, | don’t feel connected to this God at all.

| don’t even know what kind of point system the guy’s using.

| tell you one thing,

I’m sure as hell glad he ain’t my bookie.

ELLIE: Ew.

What the-- Cockroach.

MICK: All right, guys.

Let’s just settle down, try and focus. Okay?

The topic we’re gonna talk about

is the higher power, all right?

God or whatever your higher power might be.

You know, how you see him, or her, or it.

Yeah, well, I-l for one am one of those, um,

uh...what do you call it?

Agnostics. Yeah.

You don’t believe in God. No.

Typical.

Oh, yeah, like you do, right?

| do now.

If you don’t believe in God,

how can you remotely hope to stay sober, huh?

Well, Tommy hasn't had a drink in, like, what?

Eleven months, four weeks and two days.

Two hundred and forty-three minutes, 12 seconds.

Hey, asshole.

You're really trying to tell me

that God is helping keep him sober?

| don’t think so, sweetheart.

He’s white-knuckling it.

Sorry, Tom, it’s true.

If you can’t find your way

to some sort of faith-based foundation here,

you're doomed to fail.

ELLIE: | really think she’s right.

Thank you.

Oh, don’t listen to her.

She still goes to 9:00 mass every Sunday.

Yeah, so what?

Okay, guys, the truth of the matter is

if you don’t believe in some form

of higher power, trust in something

bigger than yourself,

you're gonna wind up counting days.

| mean, believe me. | was a priest, okay?

| find more God in these rooms, even in this room,

than | ever did when | was working for the church.

You know? Hey, Sean.

T-the ability to share y-your sins with other sinners,

that’s what's gonna get you through.

Even if, let’s say, two minutes

after we walk out of this apartment, okay,

Tommy goes into the kitchen, opens up a kitchen cabinet,

finds a brand-spanking-new bottle of Maker’s Mark,

if he has faith and trust, he won’t drink it.

Holy shit.

What? There’s a bottle

of Maker’s Mark in one of these cabinets?

Ow! Goddamn it.

[SIGHS] SEAN: I-I--

Sean-- Sean, why is your hand up?

Well, | have something that I-I’d like to share.

Uh, okay, Sean.

Okay, um, God, for me--

Yeah. He, uh-- He’s a, you know--

He’s just this huge, uh, kind of all-powerful,

enormous...

cloud.

God is a cloud? Yeah, well,

I’m not finished yet, Maggie.

He’s, you know, this giant cloud of pink gas.

[SNORTS]

SEAN: Oh, wow. That’s--

Okay, | didn’t realize that there

was going to be judgment happening.

Why is he here? Why is he here?

| thought | was in--

No, no. He is not an alcoholic.

Yes, | am. No, you’re not!

SEAN: Yes, | am. MAGGIE: Prove it!

Prove it? I’m here. I--

Listen, Pinky.

How many drinks you have a day?

Depends on the occasion, really.

Give us a ballpark. Such a liar.

Five, eight, 12 drinks a day?

Well, 12 is a lot.

This guy ain’t no souse.

MICK: Guys-- You-- |--

MAGGIE: Who votes that Sean does not

get to come to these meetings any more?

MICK: Whoa. Hold on.

Well, you know what,

who votes that | get to stay?

You know, | only drink a little bit myself.

TOMMY: Yeah, here’s the denial talking now.

Total denial right here.

Hey, asshole. MICK: Guys, please.

I’m trying to chair this meeting.

I’m going to look for that bottle.

You know, when are you going to face the facts?

What, you’re gonna start drinking again?

You know what? Guys, guys, please.

There’s another rat.

[WOMEN YELLING]

|-it’s just a mouse, okay?

It’s just a mouse, don’t worry. Can you guys, please--

[GRUNTING]

This place is as dry as a goddamn bone.

Booze.

[WHIMPERS] Go find booze.

[THE VON BONDIES’ "C’MON, C’MON" PLAYING]

On another day C’mon, c’mon f

With these ropes tied tight Can we do no wrong? J

J Now we grieve ‘Cause now it’s gone

Things were good When we were young f

~ When my teeth bite down | can see the blood J

J Of a thousand men Who have come and gone f

J Now we grieve ‘Cause now it’s gone

Things were good When we were young f

I Is it safe to stay? C’mon, c’mon J

? Was it right to leave? C’mon, c’mon f

~ Will | ever learn? C’mon, c’mon J

~ C’mon, c’mon C’mon, c’mon J

I'll have the chicken and I'll have the waffles.

Heavy on the chicken, heavy on the waffles

and, uh, why don’t you give me

a fruit salad for my conscience.

You got it, sugar.

I'll have the same.

Uh, hold the fruit.

Thank you.

All right. Heh-heh.

Whoo, how about some fries with that shake?

Hey, Mike, would you please not make a correlation

between food and that woman’s ass?

You're going to ruin my appetite.

I’m gonna go get her number.

Are you kidding me?

Hey.

, Dad? ow you doing?

Why-- Why do you have the baby?

Um, | made a deal with Mom.

You made a-- You want to help me out?

Yeah. Thank you.

A deal with Mom-- Uh, Jesus.

[SNIFFS]

Whew. Where'd you get this car?

From Cheech and Chong?

So, what’s the deal? I--

| have him three days a week.

Me and Tony, okay?

Mom’s paying us a babysitting fee

and besides that, it’s good for me.

You know, practice and stuff.

It’s pra-- Heh. Whoa, whoa.

What do you mean "practice"?

D-- Please don’t tell me you're thinking

about having a baby with-- With-- Hi.

The guy who owns this piece of crap?

Are you crazy? Okay, | don’t--

| don’t have time for this.

You don’t h-- Okay, explain to me

why your mother doesn’t have the baby full-time.

Please.

Colleen?

Coll--

[BOTTLE CLATTERS]

Wha-- What is this?

Tony had three out-of-town gigs this week.

Okay, you know what?

Did you get some new tattoo on your ass?

What's this?

It’s the bass player’s. Don’t worry about it, okay?

I’m taking that baby out of this car.

No, you’re not!

Yes, I’m taking that baby out of this car.

Stop it! No, no, Dad. Just stop it!

Colleen.

Don’t you start that car.

No-- Ah, wait, wait, wait.

[SIGHS]

Okay, you know what?

I’Il make a deal with you, okay?

If you promise not to drive the baby in this car any more,

I'll give you a brand-new credit card, how about that?

For what?

For not driving the baby

and you give me, um--

Tell me where Mom is and, um--

’Cause | need to talk to her.

A-and you let me have the baby,

eh, a couple days a week without her knowing about it.

What? | don’t think so.

Uh, okay. You know-- Ha-ha.

All right?

How about that?

All right? You can charge as much as you want.

My name’s already on here, Dad.

Yeah, because | was anticipating, all right?

| was thinking ahead. No deal, okay?

You were going to give this to me anyway.

You know what? Listen to me. Because | love you.

Because |’m, like, the Wayne Gretsky of dads,

| was anticipating that-- Bye!

Wait, no. Turn the car off, please.

[SIGHS]

Jesus Christ.

All right.

If you promise not to drive the baby in the car any more

and the other stuff, I'll give you a--

I'll give you a brand-new car.

Not brand-new, but I'll get you something better than this.

Now we're talking. Okay? Please?

So...

Mom-wise...

| want a Porsche.

You are such a goddamn Gavin

it’s not even funny.

| am not getting you a Porsche. Okay, a BMW, then.

ll tell you who she’s sleeping with.

Okay, just a little info.

Who she’s sleeping with now is worth maybe--

Maybe at the outside a five- or six-year-old Jeep Cherokee.

Okay, unless she’s sleeping with somebody | know

or, you know, a female relative.

Then, maybe, you'd get a used BMW.

Yeah, okay, that’s what | thought.

Jeep Cherokee. Spill.

She’s sleeping with her new boss.

He runs a real estate company. His name is Bob.

Such a cliché.

Short, bald, uh, fat Jewish guy, right?

Mm-mm. How old is he?

Thirty-three.

All right,

listen, that card--

Um, it’s-- You can charge as much as you want.

| want you to use it for what you need, all right?

Need would mean anything for the baby.

You know, whatever you--

Birth control would be on the need list.

Okay.

Not stuff that you want.

Stuff that you want, you know,

would be pretty much anything

your boyfriend says he needs.

All right? Okay.

Okay, | love you. Love you too. Mwah.

Okay. Bye.

Bye. Bye. Bye.

All right.

Hi, Franco.

Hey. Hey, Rich.

Is everything okay?

Yeah.

Is Nat all right?

She cries sometimes.

Oh, yeah?

Well, she’s not the only one.

So, what’s up?

She, uh--

What is it, Rich?

Hey, it’s all right, man, you know?

Whatever it is, you can tell me.

She has a new boyfriend.

We just broke up four goddamn days ago, Richie.

Don’t-- Oh, this is bullshit, man.

They work together.

Oh, they work together.

Oh, that’s classic.

We break up four days ago.

All the history between us.

A goddamn marriage proposal

and she’s already latched on to some asshole from her office?

Next time they have a date | can show you where.

You'd do that for me, Rich?

| like you better.

Thanks, man.

H-hey, listen, I’m-- I’m sorry, all right?

I’m sorry for, like, losing it on you.

Okay, that was-- That was way immature.

You shouldn't do shit like that to people, okay?

That’s okay.

All right.

Now, listen, go find out when and where

that next date is taking place SO we Can spy on your sister.

Okay.

You're like the brother | never had, Franco.

| love you.

Hey, man.

I’m gonna-- I’m gonna get back to work.

Okay.

[INDISTINCT CHATTER]

Hey, you guys.

You guys hear about Bobby the Beast?

What?

Once ate 14 cheeseburgers and drank 17 beers

at 65 Truck’s fourth of July barbeque without puking.

Thus the nickname.

Crazy bastard tried to save some broad

who was already dead by using himself as a battering ram.

Hey, guys. What do we got?

Chicken Cordon Lou.

Oh, my God, my favorite.

LOU: Yeah. Oh, wow.

As | was saying, he broke through a wall,

broke his shoulder, they found the two of them all burned up.

Two guys on his crew got burned trying to pull him out.

| was a Chief over there.

Meshugeneh. Yeah.

This is the crazy shit | was

trying to talk to you about, Gavin.

Wow, it makes you think, you know, about God.

Hey, pass the corn, will you?

What are we, shirts and skins?

LOU: Yeah, apparently.

SHAWN: Wow, the mayor’s finally up in arms

about the racial situation in the F.D.N.Y.

Says here once again only 2 percent of the new class

entering probie school are made up of African-Americans. Shit.

| was the only brother | saw when | walked through.

| was the only Jew when | went through.

Mm.

| could tell you, you can count on, uh,

one hand the number of Jews in the department right now.

Heh, you Irish.

You got a lock on this job.

[CHUCKLES]

"You Irish"?

That’s what | said. Yeah.

Like w-we take a different exam than you took?

SHAWN: He’s not saying that. Come on, let’s be real.

Most of the guys down at HQ and the academy, what are they?

Irish and Italian. Catholic.

And they’re the ones who check off the grades

and decide who makes it in just to take the physical exam,

and who grades the written exam?

Probably the same guys.

I’m just saying. You know what | mean?

Word. Yeah, so what,

now it’s a, heh, goddamn plot?

Sean’s got a point, you know?

Talk to him. Which is?

Well, you know, we talked about it,

like a million times Puerto Rican-wise.

What percentage do we count for in the department?

Like, 8? Yeah, it’s better than 2.

TOMMY: Uh-huh. Tell you what,

you guys want to go deep on this bullshit,

| got you by the goddamn balls, okay?

You know how many African-Americans

I’ve saved in the course of my career? Huh?

Ill tell you how many.

| don’t have a goddamn clue.

| never pulled up, jumped off the rig

and asked, "Who," okay?

Homeless, rich, drunk, high,

or just plain goddamn stupid,

| didn’t give a shit.

You know, you ever think that maybe

the reason there ain't more Chinese and female

and black firefighters is cause

maybe they just don’t want the goddamn job.

Huh?

‘Cause it ain’t a job.

It’s a curse.

We get into it because we want to make a difference.

And in a house like this, you start making a difference

right away, right? You know that, huh?

From the first night, you go out on what?

Six, seven calls a night?

You start pulling them out one by one, two by two,

all of a sudden you’re, like, goddamn Noah, huh?

You're pulling out, uh, tiny little Chinks,

and sweaty spics, and lazy ass raisin heads,

and drunken Irish micks and name the stereotype, we got it.

We pulled them out.

Meanwhile, what’s going on with your family back home, right?

Nothing.

You’re too busy saving utter and complete strangers.

You treat your family like they’re in the back seat.

Heh.

And God? Heh.

There ain’t enough God to go around in this job, boys.

So...

ultimately,

what are you left with?

You get a couple medals on your chest.

| don’t even take those.

All | got is that scar on my hip,

a scar on my ass

and all the shit that’s bottled up in my head.

Yep.

Food, fire, and sex.

That’s pretty much all | got boys.

Maybe time for a nap in between.

You know, those nine guys that gave their lives

in the line of duty down at Charleston City?

| don’t even care what color those guys were

because they were all goddamn heroes to me.

Anybody else notice that he never mentioned

kikes in the middle of that speech?

| was too busy wondering if he was going to eat the damn dish.

[LAUGH]

[DOOR SLAMS]

[SIGHS]

MAN: Hail Mary, full of grace, the Lord is with thee.

Blessed art thou amongst women,

and blessed is the fruit of thy womb, Jesus.

Twelve years of Catholic school and you can’t remember

the shortest prayer they wrote.

| wish there was a nun here right now.

Sister Agnes Catherine.

She’d kick your skinny little Irish ass real good.

Hey, there. Good morning.

Hi. How’s it, uh-- How’s it going?

Fine.

You, um, must be the, uh-- The waitress from that, uh--

The soul food place, right?

A friend of my cousin Mike’s?

Latrina.

Latrina. Lovely.

Ah, Ken.

You take it black.

No, uh-- Yes |, uh, | do.

It's a lactose kind of a mucous--

Not me, | like a little cream in my coffee,

if you know what | mean.

You got any?

Yeah, | think, uh-- | think we do.

It should be on the top shelf there.

So |, um-- | really should get going.

You may want to stick around for a bit.

| make a whale of an omelet.

Oh, yeah, | bet you do

but | can’t, uh-- | can’t be late.

Your loss. Okay.

Have a good day.

Yeah. Excuse me.

Have a good omelet.

[SIREN HOWLS]

Come on.

Hey, doesn’t that look like the car

we pancaked the other day?

This thing’s built like a tank.

FRANCO: Yeah, the Germans.

They’re nuts about safety.

What’s the big deal?

They got airbags or something in there?

There’s airbags all around in there.

It’s like Mariah Carey meets Anna Nicole Smith.

They should put a nipple on the inside of each door

and be done with it.

Gentlemen, we have a lovely

little Knickknack shop

that the owner probably torched

for the insurance cabbage.

Tommy, you and Lou go in the front.

You guys grab black Sean

and head around the back, all right?

You got it.

| got a little problem, pal.

Which is? LOU: Hey, Joey the Jig.

Hey, Lou. Hey.

Remember how | caught my

cousin Mike banging Theresa?

Yeah. Joey, see you later.

Well, you know he’s, like, my favorite relative.

| mean, he’s more like a brother than he is a cousin.

Not to mention the fact that he gave me an out

from a relationship that otherwise probably would have

have meant my sex-related demise.

Because we're so close, I’m figuring you know what?

I’m just gonna swallow it.

You know, let it be. Let bygones be bygones.

The thing is, he’s kind of banging this waitress now,

and | think it might be, like, you know, a regular thing.

What?

Revenge sex. No.

You're thinking of having revenge sex.

Oh, you’re going to lie to me about that now?

If I’m thinking about having revenge sex,

may God strike me down now.

What you pushing me for?

Okay. All right. Well, look. You know what?

Why shouldn't I? Tit for tat.

Screw unto others as they have screwed unto you.

TOMMY: Hey.

Plus, Theresa was my girl, all right?

And he crossed the definite,

unwritten, unspoken, invisible line. Smitty!

TOMMY: Hey, Smits, what’s up?

Listen, no question, he broke the rule

that no man shall break, all right?

When it comes to ex-girlfriends,

we all know the rule, right?

Until the day she dies or you die, anybody, even me,

if | saw her across the street and | said hello

but | wanted to cross and say something else,

I’ve gotta have your permission in advance.

LOU: Right, thank you,

because that is exactly what | am thinking.

| Know. Hey. How you doing? Hey, Handsome Jack.

Hey. Lieutenant, how you doing?

Good to see you. pal. Hey, how are you pal.

Tommy, it’s good to see you.

Good to see you, man.

Did he have more work done?

Yeah, he had a couple more skin grafts done

and | think the last one they took a piece from his rear end

and attached it to his face.

So when he says kiss my ass--

Yeah, he really means it.

| think you should go ahead and make the move.

You know, come on, life’s too short. Look at him.

Yeah. Yeah, | mean,

while you’ve got your looks.

That’s what I’m thinking.

There’s only one problem though.

Which is what? Well, she’s black.

Ooh. Are we talking Halle Berry black,

or, like, Jennifer Hudson black?

Aretha Franklin black.

Now, understand-- Oh, holy shit.

It’s nothing against black women.

| they happen to be very, very beautiful.

It’s not a racial thing at all.

TOMMY: No, no, no. | mean,

nobody’s talking about

anybody’s skin color or anything.

LOU: Exactly. TOMMY: Let me ask you this.

Can she sing? How the hell do | know?

Well, I’m just asking because sometimes talent

in one area can overcome or take the edge off

a lack of talent in the other area.

Did | also mention that she’s fat?

Oh, she’s fat. Yeah.

How fat?

| mean, she’d have to be able to sing,

dance, paint and figure skate to take the edge off

and even then there’d be a lot of edge left.

Okay, well you know what?

You'd have to be psychologically damaged

or, you know, maybe even have a dent in your head

to even think about possibly having sex with somebody

under those particular circumstances.

You think?

Yeah, | think so.

I’m thinking the sooner the better.

Yeah, maybe tomorrow. You know what | mean?

Really get right back at him.

SEAN: Hey guys.

TOMMY: Hey. LOU: Hey guys.

SEAN: Check it out. Look what Sean found.

SEAN MURPHY: Antique lamp, totally untouched

by the fire or the smoke.

What? LOU: All right, three things.

This is private property,

which means it belongs to someone,

which means it has memories and emotions attached to it.

Could possibly be a family heirloom.

Okay, second, taking private property from the scene

of a fire, damaged or not, okay,

is against, uh, department regulations.

ALL: Hm.

FRANCO: What’s the Third thing, Lou?

It looks like the reading lamp, uh, from a bedside table.

Which means there’s probably another one

exactly like it, lying around.

If you can find that and bring it directly to me,

I’d appreciate it. Thank you. SEAN MURPHY: Aha.

TOMMY: You know, that’s going to look

real nice with that headboard you got out of the furniture

warehouse fire last week. It’s the fun side of arson.

And by the way, Feinberg’s been making

a lot of noises about you lately.

Okay, what kind of noises? Like, transfer noises.

| mean, the guy thinks you’re a nut,

he thinks you’re unstable, we all know that.

Blah, blah, blah.

But what he’s really pissed

at is the whole daughter

not getting touched thing.

Okay, how many times do | have to say it?

The daughter is completely--

LOU: She’s completely insane.

she’s completely crazy. Yes.

But, Tommy, it’s a problem we can easily fix.

How? You take her out one more time.

Okay? You pour, like, two or three drinks

in her and y-you cop a feel.

TOMMY: Whoa, whoa, whoa, whoa, whoa.

Cop a feel?

You give her a little kiss here,

a little kiss there, a little squeezy,

squeezy, squeezy and a little tit action, you know,

you feel her up a little bit,

bing, bang, boom. Done deal.

Bing, bang, boom?

Look, | meant that metaphor-- You know--

More in the lines of, like, dropping her home

than sexual intercourse.

Oh, okay, okay, okay.

Now, define "a little”,

when it comes to, you know--

I’m talking about, you know,

a little finger action.

Finger action?

Well, what do you want me to say?

Third base, okay? Well--

You want to get transferred? No.

Then use your head and use your fingers a little bit.

Okay, okay, okay.

JACK: Hey guys, look what | found.

Hey, present from me to you, Jack.

Thanks, Lou.

You’re welcome. All right, pal.

Oh, Christ, are you sure that’s his ass

because there’s a part of his chin right here

that looks a little bit like--

Scrotum. Scrotum, | know, | know.

See the thing is, | don’t like to think

of it that way because it’s too creepy.

So, what | like to do is imagine that they grafted

some other part of his body over there.

LOU: Elbow. Elbow? That’s what we'll do.

Elbow skin. Elbow skin.

That’s what it looks like.

By the way, Elbow Skin... Yeah.

Not a bad name for a band.

| think it is the name of a band.

All right, is this a keeper?

That is a keeper if ’ve ever seen one.

Oh Jesus Christ, | just saw the scrotum again.

Walk it off. Walk it off. It was an accident. Oh...

The TPS reports.

Thanks.

So, what did you have to buy Colleen

to get this address out of her?

Hi.

Anew Car.

Wait, if you-- If you’d seen the shit box

that she was taking the goddamn baby out in--

Hey, shh. Language. Oh, sorry.

Okay, | don’t want you here.

This is a fresh start for me

and | do not need this bullshit.

Shh. Language.

You're sleeping with your new boss

and you don’t want me to come in, right,

because you don’t want him comparing himself t--

MAN: Hi, Janet. Oh, hi, uh, Bob.

Uh, this is my ex-husband, uh--

Tommy. Uh, Tommy. Sorry.

Um, Bob, Tommy. Hi.

How you doing?

Janet, here are the specs

on that new boutique building.

Okay. Digest that, I'll run over

it all with you after lunch. Great. Thanks.

Nice to meet you. Nice to meet you.

Don’t get cocky.

I’m not getting cocky.

You know, | assume that you not only got the address

from Colleen but you also finagled

the fact that | have a boyfriend named Bob.

Yes, but Colleen-- She lied about--

Yeah, well, that’s not the Bob that I’m sleeping with.

Uh, this is. What?

Hey. Hi, uh, Bob,

this is uh, my ex, Tommy Gavin.

Tommy, how you doing? Hi, how are you.

J, we’ve got a showing in 10 minutes.

Yeah.

She’s taken to this job

like she was born to it.

She’s a natural. Yeah.

Ready when you are. Okay, let me check my desk.

Nice to meet you, Tommy.

| really admire what you do.

Keeping the world safe for the rest of us schmucks.

J, 5 minutes?

Yeah.

What'd you tell him about me?

Don’t.

You know, | could--

| could be wearing a suit like that too

if | wanted to spend my money on myself,

but I’d prefer to spend my money--

Our money on us.

On you and me and the kids.

Here you go, okay? What’s that?

It’s a credit card.

N-no, | don’t want it.

No, | want you to have this

in case there’s anything--

An emergency. No, | don’t want

any of Sheila’s money.

Does it say Sheila Keefe on there?

It says Janet Gavin, okay?

It’s not-- It’s not a loan, it’s our money.

She’s over the baby thing, the whole nine yards,

so just take it. What,

she has no interest in Wyatt?

Wyatt. Okay, we’re changing the baby’s name.

Did you see the reviews for the latest Kevin Costner thing?

The corporate killer Mr. Brooks thing?

His name is Wyatt. Forever.

Even Bob seems to love it.

Which Bob? The short, uh, balding Bob?

Or, big, tall, handsome, I’m-banging-your-wife Bob.

Huh?

The thing-- His eyes, th-those are--

They call them cat’s eye lenses.

Chicks wear ’em, okay? Modeling chicks.

That's the first time | ever saw a guy wear them.

That’s what you got. And he’s got husky-dog eyes.

Ow.

Go. Go. Go.

[INDISTINCT CHATTER]

[CELL PHONE RINGS]

Yeah. Hey, what are you doing?

Nothing, why? What are you doing?

Ah, the same.

Oh, cool.

So, you know, just, ah, calling to check

in and see how you're doing.

You all right?

Uh, | don’t know, man.

You know, I-| sometimes--

It’s almost been a year now and-- And | haven't had a drop

and, yeah, do | have a clear head?

Yeah, | have a clear head. Do | have clarity?

Yeah, but, you know,

what else do | have to show for it?

You know what | mean? Nothing.

What do you mean, "nothing to show for it"?

You're clean. You're living an honest life.

What are you so afraid of?

l--I’m not afraid of-- Wh-What--

I’m not afraid of anything. Bullshit.

You're waking up honest and with clarity and with

full Knowledge of what you said and you did the night before.

Huh? You want to feel the other way?

| tell you what, take a hammer

and hit yourself three full good shots

in the side of your head when you wake up

in the morning and see how that feels, all right?

You're right. You know, |’m-- I’m--

I’m glad you called. | me-- I-I’m serious.

Y-you helped me. You know. You're right.

Yeah, not a problem.

All right.

[CROWD CHATTERING]

[BEEPS]

[CELL PHONE RINGING]

Hey. Hey, how you doing?

Um, the knee’s still really sore,

but, you know, | feel better.

A-a lot better. Yeah?

What are you doing?

Um, nothing, jus-- Just chillin’.

Doing what? Nothing.

You're moping, aren’t you?

No, I-I’m not moping.

Yeah, y-you’re having a giant mope fest

over there, aren’t you?

No, I-l was just...reading.

You're reading.

That guarantees me that you’re moping.

All right? Here’s what | want you to do.

When they were bringing me down at the fire escape

the other night by your place,

| noticed down the block

there’s a bar/café thing.

| want you to put away the ice cream.

Yeah, | know you're eating ice cream, yeah.

That which guarantees again, moping.

| want you to put on something nice,

go down there a-and meet somebody. All right?

Preferably a girl.

[CELL PHONE BEEPS]

l-| got another call coming in.

Bye.

Yeah?

You busy tonight?

I’m-- I’m working at the fire house.

Why? Literally?

| only need you for about three minutes.

Yeah, well, | Know but it’ll take me 45 to get over there

and another 45 to get back. | really-- | can’t do it.

Can I-- Can | take a rain check?

Egh.

All right, pal.

Here.

Here, ready?

[WHIMPERS]

Ready?

| want you to fetch, all right?

Fetch, ready? One, two, three, go.

Get it. Look. Look-- Look at the ball.

See the kid chasing the ball?

Dogs have been doing this for ages

with their owners, pal.

Thank you, appreciate it.

Charlie.

Charlie.

Ch--

[CELL PHONE RINGS]

Ugh, whatever.

Hello?

It’s me.

Hey, how you doing?

We uh, kind of been missing you at the family meetings.

Yeah, I'll bet.

Listen, | need to talk to you.

Go ahead, talk away. | got nothing but time right now.

What? No, no, no.

In person. Face to face. Why?

Because I’m your goddamn father, that’s why.

Meet me at Hanrahan’s. The bar?

No. The synagogue.

Asshole. Be here within an hour and come alone.

All right, nice talking to you.

Hey, what do you got?

Hey. Come here.

Oh, Jesus. Egh.

Well, it’s a start.

Come on.

Come on. Drop it. Drop it. Drop it.

Drop it.

So you-- You quit drinking?

Shh, shh, shh. It’s between me and you, huh?

Yeah, | know.

Ten days now.

And you decide to quit while you’re sitting,

every day apparently, here in Hanrahan’s bar?

Three feet away from every conceivable

imaginable type of booze?

You sit here all day drinking

coffee and tea and this is how--

How you test yourself?

You gotta face your fears, kid.

Look them straight in the eye.

| spent 60 some odd years belting down the booze.

| might as well try my last 15 or so sober.

See what it’s like.

You're planning on living to be, like, 97 years old?

Why not?

My dad did. Uh-huh.

Listen. I’m doing this my way.

So...why did you ask me down here?

| want you to tell me about what you guys

are talking about in the meeting, you know?

Just so | can you, know, kind of, like, compare notes.

W-We'’re talking about God.

God?

Yeah, you know.

Faith.

Christ.

Yeah, well, | Know how you feel about those two.

The great all powerful God.

Where was God when | landed on a beach in Normandy and

every other guy was getting his head blown off?

When | had to fight off those five Nazis.

Fighting for my life with only a rock in my bare hands?

Where was God then, huh?

Don’t talk to me about God.

As far as I’m concerned, God was your mother.

The way she raise you kids, the love she showed you.

The way she helped you overcome all the stuff

that scared the shit out of you.

The height thing, the bee thing,

your mother was a saint.

What heights thing? I’m not afraid of heights.

What are you talking about?

I’m a goddamn fireman for Christ’s sake.

I’m up on the ladder or in the bucket every other goddamn day.

No, not now. Thanks to her.

Christ, she couldn’t even

put you in the highchair.

But sh-she cured you.

She took you up on the roof, and held you over the side

and tickled you with her nose.

Next thing you know,

you were begging her

to throw you up in the air.

What was the bee thing?

You were deathly afraid of them.

You used to wear a wool hat in the summer

so they wouldn’t bite you on the head.

| don’t think you ever got over that.

Oh, there’s one now.

Where?

[LAUGHS]

Gotcha.

[LAUGHING]

[CHURCH BELL CLANGS]

[CELL PHONE RINGS]

[WHISPERS] Hello?

Hello. Shh.

Wh-Why do | gotta be quiet for?

[WHISPERS] Hang on.

Done, okay.

Now | can talk.

| was just wondering what’s up with Elvis.

You know, c-can | tell you one thing?

The Elvis thing, that name has to go. Okay?

Because-- | mean, by the time he gets to high school,

kids are gonna be dropping drugs at his feet

and peanut butter-- Fried peanut butter sandwiches.

Okay? Elvis is evergreen, asshole.

It’s like Jesus. It’s a sacred name.

It’s not like Jesus. It’s nothing like Jesus.

I-| got the baby coming back in a couple of days

and then basically it’s just you and me sharing him.

Yay.

Yeah. By the way, you, uh--

What floor are you on now?

| live on the Fifth floor, why?

What about w-window guards?

You got window guards and things

out there on t-the terrace?

W-- The kid can barely sit up.

How’s he going to make it out to the terrace?

All right, he starts sitting up.

Next thing you know he sees

a bird he wants to touch

and he goes out there,

seconds later he’s bouncing off

the roof of a taxi, okay?

Eric Clapton’s kid?

Does that ring a bell, huh?

Oh, okay. Well,

l’Il get some window guards.

You’re sure it’s the fifth floor

because it seemed awfully much higher than that

the last time | was there.

| think | Know what floor | live on,

you big dipshit.

Anywho, so day after tomorrow?

Yeah, yeah.

I’m so excited, | can’t wait.

All right, I'll talk to you later. Bye.

[WHISPERS] Jesus Christ. Unbelievable.

WOMAN: Bless me father for | have sinned.

It has been three days since my last confession.

These are my sins.

Um...

| took the name of the lord in vain 67 times.

| was envious of my neighbor Shirley

and her new boyfriend, Sal.

| stole the newspaper from

Shirley’s doorstep one morning

and | had impure thoughts while | was watching

last week’s episode of According to Jim.

Father?

I’m sorry.

| won’t watch that show any more.

Well, um, no--

[CLEARS THROAT]

God wants you to watch the--

| don’t think he cares about t-the show.

| think you should, uh--

Just cut down on t-the name

in vain thing and the stealing thing

is probably not a good idea.

And uh...

just, you know, say, um-- Say, um, the Hail Mary.

| think th-- Say, uh, one Hail Mary.

Actually, just say the last part of the Hail Mary.

The last couple of lines of the Hail Mary.

Holy Mary, Mother of God.

Pray for us sinners now

and at the hour of our death,

amen.

At the hour of our death. Shit.

What? What?

Huh? W-What?

Huh? Um, you're all set.

That’s it? Yep.

That’s, uh, total ab-- Absolution.

Stay away from the name thing

and the stealing thing and you'll be...golden.

Amen. All right, see you.

Oh, uh, the, uh--

It’s broke.

[GLASS CLINKING IN BAG]

Ugh.

Ahh.

MAN [ON TV]: ...Richardson has moved to the point guard...

... passes to Curry ...guarded by Haywood--

Nice spin move by Curry.

Stops at about 8-- And puts it in...

Ah.

[INDISTINCT CHATTER]

[BAND PLAYING ROCK MUSIC]

[ALL CHEERING]

MAN [ON TV]: ...New York up by 12.

Daniels brings it in for Washington...

Needs some help... crosses half court...

.. Stops at the three point line,

looks to his left, finds Butler in the quarter...

Buy me a drink.

Yeah.

Totally. What--

What are you drinking?

I’m having a bourbon.

Bourbon, okay. Mm-hmm.

Hey, I’m--

I’m sorry, bartender. BARTENDER: Yeah?

Could | get a bourbon for the lady?

You're really super cute, do you know that?

You have this boyishness about you.

Really? Mm-hm.

You have really soulful eyes.

Thanks.

Ah, well, what do you think of me?

Oh, y-you...you’re slamming.

Yeah? Yeah. You're totally hot.

Well, thank you, sweetie pie.

[BOTH GIGGLE]

How’d you like to get in on

a little mother-daughter action?

Wow.

Let’s go.

MAN [ON TV]: ...Daniels gets free...

[BOTTLE CLATTERS ON FLOOR]

...puts it up and gets blocked by...

Agh.

...that’s okay. Washington gets it back...

MAN 2: That’s Curry’s second block on Haywood...

Oh, this could be a problem.

...with ten seconds on the shot...

[ELEVATOR DINGS]

So do you want a drink first

or, uh, do you wanna just get right to it?

Well, I-l guess w-we should j-just get right to it, right?

Okay. Yeah.

WOMAN: Ma, you still up?

MOTHER: Well, well,

he’s delicious.

[SIREN HOWLING]

Here’s a new one, boys.

We got a window washer hanging off a broken scaffold

on the side of a building.

How high up are we talking?

Only 35 floors.

| thought those guys

are supposed to work in pairs.

Yeah, well, bachelor number two

took a nosedive and kissed the curb.

Guess the curb didn’t kiss back, huh?

[SIRENS HOWLING]

MAN [OVER RADIO]: Attention all responding units...

And Humpty Dumpty had a great fall.

NEEDLES: He just lost points on his landing.

Let’s go, ladies.

All right, what do we got?

He just regained consciousness.

He keeps reaching for that rope, he’s going to loosen

the knot and join his buddy on the pavement.

NEEDLES: Jesus Christ. Gavin, you’re up.

FRANCO: Hey, I'll go with you, Tom.

NEEDLES: Negative. That thing won’t take the weight.

Come on, Tommy, let’s go.

[MAN SCREAMING OUTSIDE]

Right, uh...

MAN [SCREAMING]: Help me!

Come on, he’s not gonna make it much longer.

Get out there.

Ugh.

MAN: Oh, God. Help.

Oh, sh--

NEEDLES: Come on, Tommy. Today. Let’s go.

MAN: Ah! Ah. Please. Help me!

Hey, asshole. Stop shaking it.

God. Oh... Whoo.

NEEDLES: Come on, what’s the hold up, Tommy? Move.

All right. Hang on. [SCAFFOLD CREAKS]

Ah...

[MAN SCREAMS]

Mother of God. Oh, shit.

Pray for us sinners...

now...

and in the hour of our death, amen.

Okay.

[MAN YELLS]

Here | come, pal.

Easy.

Okay...here comes a rope. Oka--

You ready? Yeah.

You got it? Yeah.

Holy, shit. NEEDLES: All right.

Bring him in smooth, Tommy. Don’t rock it.

TOMMY: Come on.

You got it?

[GRUNTS]

NEEDLES: That's it. That's it.

[GRUNTING]

[SHUDDERS]

Thank you.

All right. Ah.

NEEDLES: Get him in now before the rig goes, Tommy, come on.

Boys, take a hole.

Jesus Christ.

You okay?

Okay, let’s get inside now.

[HELICOPTER WHIRRING}] Don’t look down.

[Pre]