All language subtitles for The Simpsons - 37x12 - The Fall Guy-Yi-Yi.EDITH.English.HI.C.orig.Addic7ed.com

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Would you like to inspect the original subtitles? These are the user uploaded subtitles that are being translated: 1 00:00:02,961 --> 00:00:06,298 ♪ The Simpsons ♪ 2 00:00:09,134 --> 00:00:10,135 [BART] This is it, Bart. 3 00:00:10,219 --> 00:00:11,386 If you strike Uter out, 4 00:00:11,470 --> 00:00:14,139 the team gets a pizza party and you'll die a legend. 5 00:00:14,223 --> 00:00:16,725 Lose and we just get the pizza party. 6 00:00:19,478 --> 00:00:23,982 I've seen better batters at the International House of Pancakes. 7 00:00:24,066 --> 00:00:27,236 This is a children's game, Herr Comic Book Mensch. 8 00:00:27,319 --> 00:00:28,362 And? 9 00:00:28,445 --> 00:00:31,865 Und das ist mein son that you are trash-en talk-en. 10 00:00:31,949 --> 00:00:34,535 Your son? Oh, dear. If I had known... 11 00:00:35,410 --> 00:00:37,913 Send this eunuch back to Munich! 12 00:00:37,996 --> 00:00:39,706 Blitzkrieg! 13 00:00:39,790 --> 00:00:42,501 - [GRUNTS] Ow, ow, ow! - [SPECTATORS GASP] 14 00:00:42,584 --> 00:00:45,170 - [COMIC BOOK GUY SCREAMS] - [ALL CHEERING] 15 00:00:45,254 --> 00:00:49,174 It only took 200 years, but baseball finally got interesting. 16 00:00:49,258 --> 00:00:50,717 Hey! [EXCLAIMS] 17 00:00:50,801 --> 00:00:52,386 [ALL GRUNTING] 18 00:00:52,469 --> 00:00:55,347 [MUTTERS IN GERMAN, GRUNTS] 19 00:00:55,430 --> 00:00:58,183 Dang, that dude's a certified badass. 20 00:00:58,267 --> 00:01:03,230 - [SCOFFS] Our dad could take him. - He teaches Brazilian jujitsu on Zoom. 21 00:01:03,313 --> 00:01:05,983 My dad does security for James Corden. 22 00:01:06,066 --> 00:01:08,860 You know how many people wanna punch James Corden? 23 00:01:08,944 --> 00:01:10,654 Well, my dad's a badass too. 24 00:01:10,737 --> 00:01:15,617 I bet he could kill everyone in town through workplace incompetence. 25 00:01:15,701 --> 00:01:20,372 [GIGGLES] Oh, Bart, "dumbass" is not synonymous with "badass." 26 00:01:20,455 --> 00:01:22,082 [LAUGHING] 27 00:01:22,165 --> 00:01:24,543 Oh, yeah? Well, what does your dad do? 28 00:01:24,626 --> 00:01:27,921 Executes inmates via lethal injection. 29 00:01:28,005 --> 00:01:29,756 - Wow. - Wow. 30 00:01:29,840 --> 00:01:30,966 Ha ha! 31 00:01:31,049 --> 00:01:33,635 My dad is tough, right? 32 00:01:33,719 --> 00:01:36,179 [SCREAMS] Please don't hurt me. Just take my money. 33 00:01:36,263 --> 00:01:37,264 [GOOSE HONKS] 34 00:01:37,347 --> 00:01:39,474 If that's not enough, we can go to an ATM. 35 00:01:39,558 --> 00:01:41,101 - [HOMER WHIMPERS] - Mmm. 36 00:01:44,187 --> 00:01:47,316 Hey, slugger. Whatcha watching, the game? 37 00:01:47,399 --> 00:01:49,818 Shh. Great Masked British Bake Off. 38 00:01:49,901 --> 00:01:52,863 [HOMER] I think Nurse Shark is Nancy Pelosi. 39 00:01:53,864 --> 00:01:55,115 [GROANS] 40 00:01:55,198 --> 00:01:59,369 Hey, I got tickets to tonight's MMA fight. Should be pretty badass. 41 00:01:59,453 --> 00:02:02,456 Uh, why don't you take Lisa? She could use some toughening up. 42 00:02:02,539 --> 00:02:06,043 Homer, either bond with your son or help me fold this laundry. 43 00:02:06,793 --> 00:02:07,794 [HOMER] Hmm. 44 00:02:08,587 --> 00:02:09,588 Hmm. 45 00:02:10,339 --> 00:02:11,340 Hmm. 46 00:02:12,257 --> 00:02:13,592 Ugh! Fine. 47 00:02:13,675 --> 00:02:19,056 [MMA ANNOUNCER] Springfield Brawliseum, are you ready to fist? 48 00:02:19,139 --> 00:02:20,474 [CROWD CHEERING] 49 00:02:20,557 --> 00:02:22,851 Celebrities with us at ringside tonight, 50 00:02:22,934 --> 00:02:28,398 retired heavyweight champ and CTE denier, Drederick Tatum. 51 00:02:28,482 --> 00:02:32,069 Aviator and man about town, Arnie Pye. 52 00:02:32,152 --> 00:02:33,445 And Latin TV star 53 00:02:33,528 --> 00:02:39,368 and owner of tonight's sponsor, Ay, Mi Cabeza mezcal, Bumblebee Man. 54 00:02:39,451 --> 00:02:40,577 [CROWD CHEERING] 55 00:02:40,661 --> 00:02:47,542 But first, it's time to scour the crowd for our most macho fan. 56 00:02:47,626 --> 00:02:49,211 Is it this guy? 57 00:02:49,294 --> 00:02:50,921 - [GRUNTING] - [CROWD CHEERS] 58 00:02:51,004 --> 00:02:52,881 [MMA ANNOUNCER] How about this dude? 59 00:02:52,964 --> 00:02:54,341 [SCREAMS] 60 00:02:54,424 --> 00:02:56,635 [GRUNTING] 61 00:02:56,718 --> 00:02:58,095 [CROWD CHEERING] 62 00:02:58,762 --> 00:03:01,848 [MMA ANNOUNCER] Or is it him? 63 00:03:01,932 --> 00:03:03,600 [CROWD BOOING] 64 00:03:03,684 --> 00:03:06,311 [GASPS] Look, sweetie. We're on the kiss cam. 65 00:03:07,979 --> 00:03:12,067 - Stop, Dad. You're embarrassing me. - What the hell's your problem? 66 00:03:12,150 --> 00:03:13,485 My problem? 67 00:03:13,568 --> 00:03:14,861 [GRUNTS] 68 00:03:14,945 --> 00:03:16,863 I have the wussiest dad in town! 69 00:03:16,947 --> 00:03:18,031 [GASPS] Wuss? 70 00:03:18,115 --> 00:03:19,408 Oh, whoa, whoa, whoa. [STAMMERS] 71 00:03:19,491 --> 00:03:21,535 D'oh! Son of a... 72 00:03:21,618 --> 00:03:23,537 [GRUNTS] D'oh! [YELPS] 73 00:03:23,620 --> 00:03:25,997 Hey, Carl. Your shoelace is untied. 74 00:03:26,081 --> 00:03:27,582 So's yours. 75 00:03:27,666 --> 00:03:28,959 - Crisscross. - Crisscross. 76 00:03:29,042 --> 00:03:30,043 - [HOMER SCREAMS] - Whoa. 77 00:03:30,127 --> 00:03:31,294 [SCREAMING] 78 00:03:31,878 --> 00:03:33,713 - [GRUNTING] - [POUNDING] 79 00:03:33,797 --> 00:03:35,549 [SCREAMING] D'oh! 80 00:03:35,632 --> 00:03:37,134 [SCREAMING] 81 00:03:37,217 --> 00:03:38,385 - [THUDS] - [HOMER GROANS] 82 00:03:38,468 --> 00:03:39,469 [SPECTATORS GASP] 83 00:03:40,178 --> 00:03:42,848 The winner is Cotton Candy Fatso. 84 00:03:43,348 --> 00:03:44,516 [CROWD LAUGHING, CHEERING] 85 00:03:44,599 --> 00:03:46,184 That was impressive! 86 00:03:46,268 --> 00:03:47,269 [GASPS] 87 00:03:48,270 --> 00:03:49,354 Dad, Dad. 88 00:03:50,188 --> 00:03:51,690 Please don't cry on pay-per-view. 89 00:03:51,773 --> 00:03:53,358 Señor Fatso. 90 00:03:53,442 --> 00:03:57,195 That was the most hilarious fall I've ever seen in my life. 91 00:03:57,279 --> 00:04:00,574 The antics, the physics, the annoyed grunts. 92 00:04:00,657 --> 00:04:03,827 Sir, I would like to buy you a drink. 93 00:04:03,910 --> 00:04:06,496 Throw in a food and you got a deal. 94 00:04:07,914 --> 00:04:12,419 Wow! The Bumblebee Man. You're a Springfield legend, dude. 95 00:04:12,502 --> 00:04:15,839 Like Krusty, or Duffman, or the Tiki Bar Strangler. 96 00:04:15,922 --> 00:04:20,427 [CHUCKLES] You flatter me, young man. And, please, call me Pedro. 97 00:04:20,510 --> 00:04:24,848 I didn't know you, uh, yacht rock types watch my show. 98 00:04:24,931 --> 00:04:26,892 Are you kidding? I don't know Spanish, 99 00:04:26,975 --> 00:04:29,186 but when you get kicked in the junk by a nun, 100 00:04:29,269 --> 00:04:32,689 you speak the international language of crotch. 101 00:04:32,773 --> 00:04:34,316 [CHUCKLES] Believe it or not, 102 00:04:34,399 --> 00:04:37,194 I didn't set out to be a physical comedian. 103 00:04:37,277 --> 00:04:42,699 I left Mexico with dreams of being a serious actor in Hollywood. 104 00:04:43,283 --> 00:04:46,578 [BUMBLEBEE MAN] Unfortunately, I was brought to the wrong sign 105 00:04:46,661 --> 00:04:49,289 by a stupid money-hungry coyote. 106 00:04:49,372 --> 00:04:53,168 [SIGHS] It was the worst day of my life. 107 00:04:53,710 --> 00:04:59,382 Then I came upon a grand opening for a new Spanish-language TV station. 108 00:04:59,466 --> 00:05:01,468 It was the best day of my life. 109 00:05:01,551 --> 00:05:04,679 I ran in, destined to become a star 110 00:05:04,763 --> 00:05:09,226 no matter how long it took or what I had to do to get there. 111 00:05:10,060 --> 00:05:11,812 [GRUNTING] 112 00:05:12,646 --> 00:05:14,564 [SCREAMS, GROANS] 113 00:05:14,648 --> 00:05:15,857 [SCREAMING] 114 00:05:15,941 --> 00:05:18,235 [SPEAKING SPANISH] 115 00:05:19,486 --> 00:05:20,570 [SCREAMING] 116 00:05:22,697 --> 00:05:26,952 [SCREAMS, GROANS] 117 00:05:27,035 --> 00:05:28,453 [SCREAMING] 118 00:05:29,120 --> 00:05:30,205 [GRUNTS] 119 00:05:30,288 --> 00:05:31,957 Mmm? [WHIMPERS] 120 00:05:32,040 --> 00:05:33,375 [SPEAKING SPANISH] 121 00:05:33,458 --> 00:05:36,127 [IN SPANISH] Life is ironic and cruel! 122 00:05:36,211 --> 00:05:38,463 [LAUGHING] 123 00:05:39,089 --> 00:05:41,883 [IN ENGLISH] You, sir, are going to be a star. 124 00:05:41,967 --> 00:05:42,976 [GASPS] 125 00:05:43,009 --> 00:05:45,011 [IN SPANISH] What? I don't speak English! 126 00:05:45,095 --> 00:05:48,098 [IN ENGLISH] And so, Bumblebee Man was born, 127 00:05:48,181 --> 00:05:51,685 a tragicomic figure cursed by the cosmos, 128 00:05:51,768 --> 00:05:54,604 like Sisyphus or Benny Hill. 129 00:05:55,730 --> 00:06:00,777 No matter what life throws at him, he always gets up and tries again, 130 00:06:00,861 --> 00:06:04,155 just like the hardworking people that watch my show. 131 00:06:04,239 --> 00:06:07,617 So, day after day, year after year, 132 00:06:07,701 --> 00:06:11,246 I sacrificed my bumble body on the altar of comedy. 133 00:06:11,955 --> 00:06:16,334 I thought I was invincible, like Curly from the Stooges. 134 00:06:17,002 --> 00:06:20,672 But alas, I was just a mortal Shemp. 135 00:06:20,755 --> 00:06:23,633 I suppose time catches up to us all. 136 00:06:24,426 --> 00:06:29,347 Now my tired show limps on in the shadow of its former glory. 137 00:06:30,181 --> 00:06:33,935 Simpsons, have you any idea what this is like? 138 00:06:35,812 --> 00:06:37,522 Are you gonna quit? 139 00:06:37,606 --> 00:06:42,944 I was, until I saw your father's hilarious fall down those steps. 140 00:06:43,028 --> 00:06:45,739 You got up without a scratch. 141 00:06:45,822 --> 00:06:47,032 [GASPS] That reminds me. 142 00:06:48,074 --> 00:06:53,538 Homero, would you do me the honor of becoming my stunt double? 143 00:06:53,622 --> 00:06:57,959 Stunt double? That's the badassiest job a dad could have. 144 00:06:58,043 --> 00:06:59,252 He'll do it. 145 00:06:59,336 --> 00:07:01,671 - What, are you crazy? - Think about it, Homer. 146 00:07:01,755 --> 00:07:05,508 You get to crash cars and have bottles broken over your head. 147 00:07:05,592 --> 00:07:07,969 All the stuff you do now, but you get paid for it. 148 00:07:08,053 --> 00:07:10,639 You'd be the toughest dad ever. Say yes. 149 00:07:10,722 --> 00:07:13,475 [♪ HOPEFUL MUSIC PLAYS] 150 00:07:14,184 --> 00:07:18,647 - You've got yourself a stuntman. - He said yes! 151 00:07:18,730 --> 00:07:22,776 [♪ MARIACHI GROUP PLAYS "WEDDING MARCH"] 152 00:07:24,861 --> 00:07:26,112 [♪ MARIACHI MUSIC PLAYS] 153 00:07:28,365 --> 00:07:31,785 There's the stuntman that's going to save my career. 154 00:07:31,868 --> 00:07:34,454 Come in. It is time. 155 00:07:34,537 --> 00:07:36,790 This is no mere costume. 156 00:07:36,873 --> 00:07:40,043 It is the armor of hope, a beacon of light, 157 00:07:40,126 --> 00:07:45,382 a symbol of truth, justice, and the Mexican-American güey. 158 00:07:45,465 --> 00:07:49,344 Uh, Homero, you're wearing the stinger in the front. 159 00:07:49,427 --> 00:07:53,598 [GIGGLES] Whoops. A man can dream. En garde. Ooh. Eh. Huh. 160 00:07:53,682 --> 00:07:58,019 Before we get started, I must ask you to sign a nondisclosure agreement, 161 00:07:58,103 --> 00:08:02,524 for my fans would be devastated to know I'm not doing my own stunts. 162 00:08:02,607 --> 00:08:06,444 No problem, Pedro. I sign tons of NDAs. 163 00:08:06,528 --> 00:08:08,697 In fact, I just signed one at work. 164 00:08:08,780 --> 00:08:12,450 Apparently, our drinking water is full of radioactive... 165 00:08:12,992 --> 00:08:13,993 nothing. 166 00:08:14,077 --> 00:08:15,078 Mmm. 167 00:08:15,161 --> 00:08:17,038 [SPEAKING SPANISH] 168 00:08:18,373 --> 00:08:19,833 [DIRECTOR] Cut! ¡El doble! 169 00:08:24,754 --> 00:08:26,589 You got this, tough guy. 170 00:08:26,673 --> 00:08:27,841 [DIRECTOR] ¡Acción! 171 00:08:27,924 --> 00:08:29,217 Uh. Mmm. Oh. 172 00:08:29,300 --> 00:08:33,179 [GASPS, SCREAMS] Ow! Ow! 173 00:08:33,263 --> 00:08:35,640 [SCREAMING] Ow! 174 00:08:36,307 --> 00:08:37,308 - [GRUNTS] - [HISSES] 175 00:08:37,392 --> 00:08:38,727 [SIGHS] 176 00:08:38,810 --> 00:08:40,019 [YELPS] 177 00:08:42,230 --> 00:08:43,440 [SPEAKING SPANISH] 178 00:08:43,523 --> 00:08:45,483 [IN SPANISH] I do not like life! 179 00:08:46,651 --> 00:08:48,486 [LAUGHING, CHEERING] 180 00:08:48,570 --> 00:08:49,571 [SPEAKING SPANISH] 181 00:08:49,654 --> 00:08:53,116 - [IN ENGLISH] Wow. Just like the old days. - That fat güero can take a hit. 182 00:08:53,199 --> 00:08:54,367 - Homer! - [CHEERING] 183 00:08:54,451 --> 00:08:55,869 Whoo-hoo! 184 00:08:56,369 --> 00:09:01,332 And then everyone on set high-fived Dad. Even the non-writing producers. 185 00:09:01,416 --> 00:09:04,127 Ooh! They're a hard bunch to please. 186 00:09:04,210 --> 00:09:06,004 [SINGSONGY] Bart's proud of Dad! 187 00:09:06,087 --> 00:09:07,964 - Bart's proud of Dad! - [SINGSONGY] Bart's proud of Dad! 188 00:09:08,048 --> 00:09:11,676 Oh, it's true. I can't wait to tell the kids at school 189 00:09:11,760 --> 00:09:14,721 that my dad is Bumblebee Man's stunt guy. 190 00:09:14,804 --> 00:09:18,600 No dice, boy. That's a secret. Remember, I signed that MDMA? 191 00:09:18,683 --> 00:09:21,686 Oh, man. What's the use of having a badass in the family 192 00:09:21,770 --> 00:09:23,188 if you can't brag about him? 193 00:09:23,271 --> 00:09:25,398 Now I know how the Mangiones feel. 194 00:09:25,482 --> 00:09:29,819 Dad, isn't it problematic for a white man to double for a Mexican actor? 195 00:09:29,903 --> 00:09:34,115 The director thought that too, so he gave me these brown sleeves to wear. 196 00:09:34,199 --> 00:09:36,367 [GASPS] But that's Brown face. 197 00:09:36,451 --> 00:09:38,912 No, it's just brown arms and legs. 198 00:09:38,995 --> 00:09:42,165 Besides, with all the ICE going on these days, 199 00:09:42,248 --> 00:09:45,710 isn't it better to have a white guy suffer instead of a Mexican guy? 200 00:09:46,211 --> 00:09:47,420 Well, you got me there. 201 00:09:47,504 --> 00:09:49,589 Not too much suffering, right? 202 00:09:49,672 --> 00:09:52,133 'Cause I don't want you getting badly hurt. 203 00:09:52,217 --> 00:09:56,429 Relax, honey. It's all pies in the face and slipping on plantain peels. 204 00:09:56,513 --> 00:09:58,014 I'll be fine. 205 00:09:58,098 --> 00:09:59,140 [♪ "UNKNOWN STUNTMAN" PLAYING] 206 00:09:59,224 --> 00:10:00,809 ♪ I might fall from a tall building ♪ 207 00:10:00,892 --> 00:10:03,353 ♪ I might roll a brand-new car ♪ 208 00:10:03,853 --> 00:10:06,439 ♪ 'Cause I'm the unknown stuntman ♪ 209 00:10:06,523 --> 00:10:08,942 ♪ That made Redford such a star ♪ 210 00:10:18,034 --> 00:10:19,035 [♪ "UNKNOWN STUNTMAN" ENDS] 211 00:10:21,371 --> 00:10:23,123 Look at all these fans. 212 00:10:23,206 --> 00:10:25,750 How come you never ditched TV and became a movie star, 213 00:10:25,834 --> 00:10:28,294 like all those guys who regret leaving SNL? 214 00:10:28,378 --> 00:10:32,298 Ah. I once wrote a script for a Bumblebee Man film. 215 00:10:32,382 --> 00:10:36,970 It was a time travel comedy, and a love letter to my beloved Mexico. 216 00:10:37,053 --> 00:10:41,683 I sent it to every studio in Hollywood, but no one understood it. 217 00:10:42,308 --> 00:10:44,227 Maybe I should have written it in English. 218 00:10:44,978 --> 00:10:46,312 Bah! What you gonna do? 219 00:10:46,688 --> 00:10:48,982 [IN SPANISH] Go on. Ask him sweetie. 220 00:10:49,065 --> 00:10:52,152 [IN ENGLISH] Can I smash you over the head with my crowbar? 221 00:10:52,235 --> 00:10:57,574 Uh, I would love to, but, uh, it's a union thing. 222 00:10:57,657 --> 00:10:59,826 But you can hit my friend if you'd like. 223 00:10:59,909 --> 00:11:01,035 Huh? D'oh! 224 00:11:02,829 --> 00:11:05,665 Honey, I'm ho... What the hell? 225 00:11:05,748 --> 00:11:08,585 Well, I'm just hugging you. I'm happy you're home. 226 00:11:08,668 --> 00:11:10,503 - [GRUNTS] - [HOMER WHIMPERS] 227 00:11:10,587 --> 00:11:11,588 Are you crying? 228 00:11:11,671 --> 00:11:15,717 Yes. I've never gotten an after-work hug from you before. 229 00:11:16,259 --> 00:11:18,344 Also, I have three fractured ribs on that side. 230 00:11:18,428 --> 00:11:21,139 It sucks not being able to brag about my dad. 231 00:11:21,222 --> 00:11:24,100 How can you stand not getting credit for all those awesome stunts? 232 00:11:24,184 --> 00:11:28,938 Hey, who needs credit when you get after-work hugs from your twin boys? 233 00:11:29,022 --> 00:11:31,357 [DISTORTED] Did you get a concussion today, Dad? 234 00:11:31,441 --> 00:11:34,027 Maybe. Don't tell your mothers. 235 00:11:36,070 --> 00:11:39,157 Homero, you are one hell of a stuntman. 236 00:11:39,240 --> 00:11:44,078 All in a day's work, amigo. Yep, anyhoo, I gotta go pee some blood. 237 00:11:45,872 --> 00:11:50,752 Bumblebee Man? Wow! I am a huge fan. I'm Johnny... 238 00:11:50,835 --> 00:11:54,839 Johnny Knoxville from Jackass. Of course I know you. 239 00:11:54,923 --> 00:11:59,636 Oh, my goodness. Every great bit I ever did was because of you. 240 00:11:59,719 --> 00:12:03,181 Power wash enema, crab Jacuzzi, fire ant facial. 241 00:12:03,264 --> 00:12:04,682 [CHUCKLES] You're too kind. 242 00:12:04,766 --> 00:12:07,518 Tell me, when is the next Jackass picture coming out? 243 00:12:07,602 --> 00:12:11,314 Oh, I'm done with those, man. My body just can't take it anymore. 244 00:12:11,397 --> 00:12:13,399 But the studio keeps asking. 245 00:12:13,483 --> 00:12:17,237 They even suggested I secretly use a stuntman. 246 00:12:17,320 --> 00:12:20,657 [CHUCKLES] The nerve of those frijole counters. 247 00:12:20,740 --> 00:12:22,325 They don't get guys like us. 248 00:12:22,408 --> 00:12:25,787 We'd rather traumatize a film crew with our grisly on-set death 249 00:12:25,870 --> 00:12:29,290 than ever let some stuntman take our hits, right? 250 00:12:29,374 --> 00:12:31,960 Hey, Pedro, they need us back on set so we can... 251 00:12:32,043 --> 00:12:36,297 Huh. Who's this fella that's got your exact size and build? 252 00:12:36,381 --> 00:12:41,678 [STUTTERS] This is my trainer. He keeps me comedically obese. 253 00:12:43,263 --> 00:12:45,515 Hey, you're doing a bang-up job, tubby. 254 00:12:45,598 --> 00:12:49,102 Let's toast. They might have replaced our knees, shoulders 255 00:12:49,185 --> 00:12:54,315 and, uh, other stuff, but they can never replace our integrity. 256 00:12:56,317 --> 00:12:57,694 [WHIMPERS] 257 00:12:57,777 --> 00:13:03,074 I am a liar and a fraud. What was I thinking hiring a stuntman? 258 00:13:03,157 --> 00:13:06,869 You were thinking let someone else get banged up for a change. That's fine. 259 00:13:06,953 --> 00:13:12,500 No. My audience expects to see me getting banged hard and often, 260 00:13:12,583 --> 00:13:14,711 and I lied to them. 261 00:13:14,794 --> 00:13:19,132 For what? Ratings? Money? A stupid Calvin Klein ad? 262 00:13:20,300 --> 00:13:21,884 [SOBBING] 263 00:13:21,968 --> 00:13:24,762 I'm nothing but a sellout. 264 00:13:24,846 --> 00:13:27,307 Hey, come on now, don't cry in front of the gringos. 265 00:13:28,725 --> 00:13:33,646 That's it. I'm quitting. Show business is no place for a phony. 266 00:13:33,730 --> 00:13:38,151 You can't quit now. The show's a hit, and my son's never been prouder of me. 267 00:13:38,234 --> 00:13:42,989 I'm sorry, Homero. Nothing in the world can make me change my mind. 268 00:13:43,072 --> 00:13:44,073 Hola, Pedro. 269 00:13:44,157 --> 00:13:49,245 I am Alejandro González Iñárritu, Oscar-winning director of The Revenant. 270 00:13:49,328 --> 00:13:51,622 [GASPS] That movie was so funny. 271 00:13:51,706 --> 00:13:56,002 When that bear ate the boy from Titanic. 272 00:13:56,085 --> 00:13:58,212 [LAUGHS] 273 00:13:58,296 --> 00:13:59,589 Yes, thank you. 274 00:13:59,672 --> 00:14:02,967 I found your old script, and I must make this film. 275 00:14:03,051 --> 00:14:07,430 You will be the star of the most action-packed, death-defying, 276 00:14:07,513 --> 00:14:10,099 uninsurable picture ever made. 277 00:14:10,183 --> 00:14:11,559 What do you say? 278 00:14:12,769 --> 00:14:16,814 I say let's make a bee movie! 279 00:14:16,898 --> 00:14:19,275 [♪ MARIACHI GROUP PLAYS "HOORAY FOR HOLLYWOOD"] 280 00:14:21,360 --> 00:14:23,362 [♪ MARIACHI JINGLE PLAYS] 281 00:14:23,446 --> 00:14:24,864 [CROWD CHEERING] 282 00:14:24,947 --> 00:14:28,993 It's so nice of Pedro to let us come along for the filming. 283 00:14:29,077 --> 00:14:31,162 What's this movie about anyway? 284 00:14:31,245 --> 00:14:34,332 Well, if my Spanish is correct, and it is, 285 00:14:34,415 --> 00:14:38,252 it's an epic time travel adventure about a humble bee man 286 00:14:38,336 --> 00:14:39,670 who gets hilariously hurt 287 00:14:39,754 --> 00:14:42,423 during the most important moments in Mexican history. 288 00:14:42,507 --> 00:14:44,050 Mark my words! 289 00:14:44,133 --> 00:14:47,470 This action-packed film is going to make billions, 290 00:14:47,553 --> 00:14:50,431 in Mexican pesos, at the box office, 291 00:14:50,515 --> 00:14:52,100 and do you know why? 292 00:14:52,183 --> 00:14:58,523 Because I'm willing to risk it all. Brain damage, paralysis, life itself! 293 00:14:58,606 --> 00:15:03,152 You said this was all pies in the face and slipping on plantain peels. 294 00:15:03,236 --> 00:15:04,612 [CHUCKLES] Don't worry, Marge. 295 00:15:04,695 --> 00:15:07,657 I'm sure something got lost in translation. 296 00:15:07,740 --> 00:15:09,033 He said it in English. 297 00:15:09,117 --> 00:15:10,159 [SPEAKING SPANISH] 298 00:15:10,243 --> 00:15:12,286 Because no matter how dangerous, 299 00:15:12,370 --> 00:15:18,501 Bumblebee Man has always and will always do his own stunts. 300 00:15:18,584 --> 00:15:23,589 Uh. FYI, I don't do my own stunts. He does. 301 00:15:23,673 --> 00:15:25,633 That guy with the chili-dusted Popsicle. 302 00:15:26,634 --> 00:15:28,469 Mmm. Sweet. 303 00:15:28,553 --> 00:15:30,346 - [SCREAMS] Spicy! - [EXCLAIMING] What? 304 00:15:30,429 --> 00:15:34,725 You lied to your fans, to your country, to your own director? 305 00:15:34,809 --> 00:15:35,935 The movie's off! 306 00:15:36,519 --> 00:15:39,522 What if we hide his face with this green screen mask? 307 00:15:40,106 --> 00:15:41,107 [HOMER] Hmm? 308 00:15:41,190 --> 00:15:42,692 The movie's back on! 309 00:15:43,693 --> 00:15:46,779 [ALEJANDRO] We are in Lake Texcoco thousands of years ago. 310 00:15:46,863 --> 00:15:50,658 Here, Bumblebee Man will find a symbol from the gods 311 00:15:50,741 --> 00:15:52,827 that will one day be emblazoned on the flag 312 00:15:52,910 --> 00:15:55,955 and in the heart of every Mexican. 313 00:15:56,706 --> 00:15:58,457 Cue the snake and eagle! 314 00:15:59,542 --> 00:16:01,878 [SCREAMS] No! Ow! 315 00:16:01,961 --> 00:16:03,880 No, they're biting me! [SCREAMS] 316 00:16:03,963 --> 00:16:06,424 [ALEJANDRO] Cue more snakes and bigger eagles! 317 00:16:06,924 --> 00:16:08,593 - [SNAKES HISSING] - [EAGLES SCREECHING] 318 00:16:08,676 --> 00:16:11,929 [HOMER SCREAMING] Get 'em off me! Too many snakes! [SCREAMS] 319 00:16:12,555 --> 00:16:15,683 My childhood dream has come true. 320 00:16:15,766 --> 00:16:17,810 [HOMER] There's a snake inside me! 321 00:16:17,894 --> 00:16:19,562 [♪ "VIVA MÉXICO" PLAYING] 322 00:16:27,570 --> 00:16:28,821 [SCREAMS, GRUNTS] 323 00:16:29,906 --> 00:16:32,825 [SCREAMING] 324 00:16:33,367 --> 00:16:34,952 - [BELL RINGS] - [GRUNTS] 325 00:16:35,036 --> 00:16:36,204 [♪ "VIVA MÉXICO" ENDS] 326 00:16:36,704 --> 00:16:38,122 [GASPS] Dad's home! 327 00:16:38,706 --> 00:16:40,583 - [GROANS] - [CHUCKLES] 328 00:16:40,666 --> 00:16:42,335 - [YELPS] - [BART GRUNTS] 329 00:16:42,418 --> 00:16:43,920 - Good Lord! - [GASPS] Dad! 330 00:16:44,003 --> 00:16:46,130 What the hell? You dodged my hug. 331 00:16:46,214 --> 00:16:50,635 Can't hug. Spent all day getting my Aztec kicked. 332 00:16:50,718 --> 00:16:53,679 Homie, you can't keep doing this. You have to quit. 333 00:16:53,763 --> 00:16:57,558 The pain pills? No, I need them. Plus, they're so cheap here. 334 00:16:57,642 --> 00:17:00,978 Why in God's name would you put yourself through this? 335 00:17:01,062 --> 00:17:05,316 Uh, you're not just doing this to impress me, are you? 336 00:17:05,399 --> 00:17:09,195 Yes, but there's also the bromance element. 337 00:17:09,278 --> 00:17:11,656 So many threads. 338 00:17:11,739 --> 00:17:14,325 - [MARGE] Mmm. - [HOMER GROANING] 339 00:17:15,910 --> 00:17:16,911 [IN SPANISH] Luz, 340 00:17:16,994 --> 00:17:18,579 there's something you must know... 341 00:17:21,082 --> 00:17:22,917 [IN ENGLISH] We interrupt Juan Life to Live 342 00:17:23,000 --> 00:17:24,835 to bring you this English news bulletin. 343 00:17:24,919 --> 00:17:28,047 Beloved actor and hometown hero Bumblebee Man has been exposed 344 00:17:28,130 --> 00:17:29,382 for using a stunt double. 345 00:17:29,465 --> 00:17:33,594 Late last night, our station received this photo from an anonymous source. 346 00:17:34,178 --> 00:17:36,138 Hey, that's the picture Bart took. 347 00:17:36,806 --> 00:17:38,683 [IN SPANISH, GRUNTING] Why you little... 348 00:17:38,766 --> 00:17:42,144 [IN ENGLISH, CHOKES] I didn't do it. 349 00:17:42,228 --> 00:17:44,188 [GRUNTS] It wasn't him. 350 00:17:44,272 --> 00:17:45,523 It was me. 351 00:17:45,606 --> 00:17:47,608 It was? I thought I did it. 352 00:17:47,692 --> 00:17:49,026 I guess we both did it? 353 00:17:49,110 --> 00:17:51,112 I was lying a second ago. I also did it. 354 00:17:51,195 --> 00:17:53,948 - Why, you little... [GRUNTS] - [CHOKING] 355 00:17:54,031 --> 00:17:55,658 I'm sorry about Pedro, 356 00:17:55,741 --> 00:17:58,578 but we couldn't stand by and see you get killed. 357 00:17:58,661 --> 00:18:01,372 Or worse, become someone we have to sponge. 358 00:18:01,455 --> 00:18:02,832 [SHUDDERS] 359 00:18:02,915 --> 00:18:07,169 Oh. You care for me, but don't want to care for me. 360 00:18:07,253 --> 00:18:10,381 I feel the same about all of you. 361 00:18:10,464 --> 00:18:12,008 [CAMERA SHUTTERS CLICKING ON TV] 362 00:18:12,091 --> 00:18:14,635 I deny these vicious rumors. 363 00:18:14,719 --> 00:18:16,220 And to clear my name, 364 00:18:16,304 --> 00:18:21,851 I invite my fans to come see me perform my movie's most dangerous stunt. 365 00:18:21,934 --> 00:18:26,856 A comedic tumble down the steps of Teotihuacán. 366 00:18:26,939 --> 00:18:29,108 The pyramid of Teotihuacán? 367 00:18:29,191 --> 00:18:33,321 That's suicide! And still on our list of sights to see. 368 00:18:33,404 --> 00:18:37,533 To the pyramid of Tootytotai... To the Mexican triangle! 369 00:18:39,660 --> 00:18:40,828 [CAMERA SHUTTER CLICKS] 370 00:18:40,911 --> 00:18:43,289 Homero, you are the only one he will listen to. 371 00:18:43,372 --> 00:18:44,665 You have to stop him. 372 00:18:44,749 --> 00:18:46,459 Why are all these cameras set up? 373 00:18:46,542 --> 00:18:49,170 Well, better to have coverage and not need it 374 00:18:49,253 --> 00:18:50,963 than to need it and not have it. 375 00:18:51,047 --> 00:18:53,424 Hold on, Pedro! I'm a-coming! 376 00:18:53,507 --> 00:18:56,427 Huh. Can I talk to the transpo department? 377 00:18:59,680 --> 00:19:02,016 Pedro, stop! You can't do this. 378 00:19:02,099 --> 00:19:05,311 I must. I was supposed to suffer for my fans, 379 00:19:05,394 --> 00:19:08,064 to distract them from their daily troubles, 380 00:19:08,147 --> 00:19:09,774 and I lied to them. 381 00:19:09,857 --> 00:19:15,821 Now my only path to redemption is pain, hilarious pain. 382 00:19:16,906 --> 00:19:18,074 [GRUNTS] 383 00:19:18,157 --> 00:19:20,368 Your fans don't want to see you suffer for real. 384 00:19:20,451 --> 00:19:23,287 They just wanna see a goofy guy in a bee costume 385 00:19:23,371 --> 00:19:25,247 saying "Ay, yi, yi" about stuff. 386 00:19:25,331 --> 00:19:28,876 All I wanted was for my son to think I was a badass. 387 00:19:28,959 --> 00:19:32,171 But you know what I learned after taking all that brutal punishment? 388 00:19:32,838 --> 00:19:36,300 I hate that kid, and what he thinks doesn't matter. 389 00:19:36,384 --> 00:19:38,552 - [CRACKS] - Oh. [CHUCKLES] 390 00:19:38,636 --> 00:19:39,762 It does that now. 391 00:19:40,638 --> 00:19:41,639 [CRACKS] 392 00:19:41,722 --> 00:19:45,643 Ay, Dios. Look at you. Making this movie has broken the body 393 00:19:45,726 --> 00:19:48,896 of my best non-Mexican friend in the world. 394 00:19:48,979 --> 00:19:51,565 [SOBS] Can you ever forgive me? 395 00:19:51,649 --> 00:19:56,362 [SOBS] On one condition. Don't do this stupid stunt! 396 00:19:56,445 --> 00:20:01,575 - I won't! I love you, man! - I love you too! 397 00:20:01,659 --> 00:20:03,661 [BOTH SOBBING] 398 00:20:07,206 --> 00:20:11,961 What do you say we get out of here and go eat a taco stand into submission? 399 00:20:12,044 --> 00:20:14,422 [SNIFFLES] Sounds like a plan, amigo. 400 00:20:15,506 --> 00:20:17,133 [BOTH YELPING] 401 00:20:17,216 --> 00:20:19,427 - [HOMER SCREAMING] D'oh! D'oh! - [BUMBLEBEE MAN GRUNTING] 402 00:20:19,510 --> 00:20:20,928 [GASPING] 403 00:20:21,011 --> 00:20:22,555 - Homero! - Dad! 404 00:20:22,638 --> 00:20:25,015 The UNESCO World Heritage site! 405 00:20:25,099 --> 00:20:28,728 [BOTH SCREAMING] 406 00:20:28,811 --> 00:20:30,187 [HOMER] D'oh! Oh! Son of a... 407 00:20:30,271 --> 00:20:31,272 [BOTH YELP] 408 00:20:32,565 --> 00:20:35,025 - [HOMER SCREAMING] - [BUMBLEBEE MAN SHOUTING IN SPANISH] 409 00:20:35,109 --> 00:20:37,111 [LAUGHING] 410 00:20:40,698 --> 00:20:44,201 [IN SPANISH] This man's suffering takes away my troubles! 411 00:20:44,285 --> 00:20:48,372 [IN ENGLISH] It's beautiful. We will take out the gringo in post. 412 00:20:48,456 --> 00:20:51,375 [♪ MARIACHI GROUP PLAYS THE SIMPSONS THEME] 413 00:20:51,459 --> 00:20:52,460 Oh, so good. 414 00:20:52,543 --> 00:20:56,172 [CHUCKLES] Man, we sure are lucky we didn't get hurt in that fall. 415 00:20:56,255 --> 00:20:58,299 Uh, I'm not so sure. 416 00:20:59,592 --> 00:21:00,593 [HOMER] Hmm. 417 00:21:01,969 --> 00:21:05,055 Excuse me, amigo, are we dead? 418 00:21:05,139 --> 00:21:06,182 Hmm. 419 00:21:07,349 --> 00:21:09,393 [HOMER GRUNTING] 420 00:21:09,477 --> 00:21:11,228 No, in a coma, 421 00:21:11,312 --> 00:21:15,191 but get comfy 'cause you're gonna be here for a while. 422 00:21:18,110 --> 00:21:20,362 It might be nice to have a break. 423 00:21:20,446 --> 00:21:22,490 And some cold cervezas. 424 00:21:22,573 --> 00:21:25,910 Homero, my friend. You read my mind. 425 00:21:26,535 --> 00:21:28,537 [♪ "CIEN AÑOS" PLAYING] 426 00:21:38,547 --> 00:21:39,548 [♪ "CIEN AÑOS" ENDS] 427 00:21:41,634 --> 00:21:43,636 [♪ SPANISH SONG PLAYING] 428 00:22:20,589 --> 00:22:21,590 [♪ SONG ENDS] 429 00:22:21,674 --> 00:22:22,842 [WHISTLES] 430 00:22:26,607 --> 00:22:29,508 - synced and corrected by sot26 - www.addic7ed.com 33032

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