All language subtitles for HARDEST TRY NOT TO LAUGH EVER
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Would you like to inspect the original subtitles? These are the user uploaded subtitles that are being translated:
1
00:00:00,000 --> 00:00:04,420
Yo, what's up, it's your boy KSI, and
today we are doing a Try Not To Laugh.
2
00:00:04,540 --> 00:00:08,180
Now, apparently, this batch has a lot of
funny clips.
3
00:00:08,500 --> 00:00:11,840
So, without further ado, let's Try Not
To Laugh.
4
00:00:12,940 --> 00:00:14,220
Hi, here's your door dash.
5
00:00:15,000 --> 00:00:16,000
Thanks, man.
6
00:00:17,280 --> 00:00:19,660
A little rainy. Yeah, rainy.
7
00:00:20,120 --> 00:00:21,120
Yeah.
8
00:00:21,540 --> 00:00:23,100
Got no tips or anything.
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00:00:23,420 --> 00:00:24,500
Have a good one. Fuck you.
10
00:00:26,840 --> 00:00:29,440
How many times do a woman have to say
no?
11
00:00:29,950 --> 00:00:32,229
Well, you don't know why. She's real
serious about it.
12
00:00:32,930 --> 00:00:34,410
She's going to have to call the cops,
man.
13
00:00:34,890 --> 00:00:40,130
What? She's going to have to call the
cops, man. Nah, lock him up. Lock him
14
00:00:40,290 --> 00:00:46,870
What? She on the phone talking to the
police before he goes, ah, damn, I
15
00:00:46,870 --> 00:00:47,870
know it was like that.
16
00:00:49,890 --> 00:00:55,530
Surely, when she says no the first time,
you should get the hint. What the hell,
17
00:00:55,590 --> 00:00:58,350
man? Yeah, we did not look like we were
safe around kids.
18
00:00:59,020 --> 00:01:01,340
Well, it's tough to look safe around
kids in 2025.
19
00:01:01,620 --> 00:01:03,060
You're telling me they're getting
hotter.
20
00:01:04,260 --> 00:01:11,260
Would be a funny thing to say on a
comedy show. Going to college, Gigi went
21
00:01:11,260 --> 00:01:13,060
crazy with his new freedom.
22
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Ate fried chicken and burritos every
day.
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Burritos?
24
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God damn it, man.
25
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God damn it.
26
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Bro.
27
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If I prank a woman who's on her period,
the first thing she does is not whip out
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her panties and smear it on my face.
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It's just... No.
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Yeah, I was born in Virginia.
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And she came here when I was, like,
three, four months, years old.
32
00:01:55,650 --> 00:01:58,650
She came to Pumpin' Up Beach. You can't
be three, four months, years old,
33
00:01:58,690 --> 00:02:01,690
brother. Yeah. But I'm just saying,
though. You gotta be just three or four
34
00:02:01,690 --> 00:02:04,150
months old. You know what I'm saying,
though. Nah, you heard it.
35
00:02:04,650 --> 00:02:10,509
But she came... No, no, no. On Naughty
Dog, she came to... She came to Pompano
36
00:02:10,509 --> 00:02:14,850
when I was... Like, four months years
old. What?
37
00:02:15,290 --> 00:02:19,910
No, real shit, though. You gotta pick
one, bro. You can't be... Can't have
38
00:02:20,170 --> 00:02:23,590
Is it months or years? They're just
completely different things.
39
00:02:23,910 --> 00:02:28,010
Imagine if I was like, oh, yeah, I was
born, like, two, three decades,
40
00:02:28,350 --> 00:02:29,350
centuries.
41
00:02:30,910 --> 00:02:31,910
Like...
42
00:02:35,250 --> 00:02:39,110
Last time I did a show here, I had like
20 people show up. No,
43
00:02:52,890 --> 00:02:53,890
that's not.
44
00:02:53,930 --> 00:02:54,930
Yeah, yeah, yeah.
45
00:02:55,770 --> 00:02:58,290
Yeah, fuck him up, man. Fuck him up.
46
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Hey, hey, bitch.
47
00:03:16,260 --> 00:03:17,260
Okay,
48
00:03:19,320 --> 00:03:20,320
hi.
49
00:03:20,700 --> 00:03:23,880
Fuck my date.
50
00:03:24,240 --> 00:03:25,520
What? No.
51
00:03:26,840 --> 00:03:27,840
Sorry.
52
00:03:29,680 --> 00:03:30,680
Wait, what?
53
00:03:57,720 --> 00:03:58,720
Huh?
54
00:04:00,100 --> 00:04:00,820
This
55
00:04:00,820 --> 00:04:07,860
wasn't
56
00:04:07,860 --> 00:04:08,860
part of the script.
57
00:04:11,560 --> 00:04:12,560
Wait,
58
00:04:14,600 --> 00:04:15,600
what?
59
00:04:18,240 --> 00:04:24,100
Nah, man. We gotta stop. We gotta stop
with this AI stuff.
60
00:04:24,440 --> 00:04:26,040
It's just out of order.
61
00:04:26,460 --> 00:04:30,140
My friend set off the fire alarm at
school and hasn't got caught. Can you
62
00:04:30,140 --> 00:04:32,660
him pretending to be from the school
district and make him confess?
63
00:04:35,000 --> 00:04:36,340
Hi, is this Hayden?
64
00:04:36,580 --> 00:04:38,420
Yes. Hi, Hayden. You go to correct?
65
00:04:38,760 --> 00:04:41,760
Yeah. Who are you? Okay, wonderful. My
name is Edward. I'm calling from the
66
00:04:41,760 --> 00:04:43,820
school district. I'm calling because I
had a couple of questions.
67
00:04:44,140 --> 00:04:45,160
Did you have a second to answer?
68
00:04:45,420 --> 00:04:46,059
Oh, yeah.
69
00:04:46,060 --> 00:04:48,960
Okay, so as you probably know, there was
a bit of a predicament that went down
70
00:04:48,960 --> 00:04:52,220
last week where a fire alarm had been
pulled in the C -Wing bathroom.
71
00:04:52,600 --> 00:04:55,500
And, you know, we had to evacuate and do
a fire drill.
72
00:04:55,740 --> 00:04:56,940
And who did that?
73
00:04:57,160 --> 00:04:58,980
Yeah, who did that? Who did that?
Interesting.
74
00:04:59,380 --> 00:05:02,920
We had the same exact question. We
didn't know who did it. But you
75
00:05:03,240 --> 00:05:06,100
whoever did pull the fire alarm, that's
a crime punishable.
76
00:05:06,440 --> 00:05:10,400
It's a felony, technically punishable,
up to two years in prison or 80 hours in
77
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community service.
78
00:05:11,220 --> 00:05:11,979
Did you know that?
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00:05:11,980 --> 00:05:12,980
Well, yeah.
80
00:05:23,290 --> 00:05:24,690
No.
81
00:05:26,970 --> 00:05:28,370
No.
82
00:05:43,870 --> 00:05:46,630
No, okay, so Hayden, do you want to know
what you need to do to make things
83
00:05:46,630 --> 00:05:47,690
right? What do I do?
84
00:05:48,250 --> 00:05:51,790
What do you do? Right, so Hayden, first
what I need you to do, I need you to
85
00:05:51,790 --> 00:05:56,410
understand that by doing something like
this, you are pulling resources from
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00:05:56,410 --> 00:05:59,410
people who truly need it. You
understand, I don't know, did you hear
87
00:05:59,410 --> 00:06:03,850
fire that was about 35 miles away at the
same time? No, okay, yeah, it was near
88
00:06:03,850 --> 00:06:08,150
the downtown part of the city, and when
you pulled that fire alarm, you took
89
00:06:08,150 --> 00:06:09,490
half of the fire department.
90
00:06:10,080 --> 00:06:11,820
You took those sources to our school.
91
00:06:12,240 --> 00:06:15,680
Instead, those fire trucks could have
gone downtown and put out the fire. So
92
00:06:15,680 --> 00:06:18,740
know what? Three people lost their lives
because of that. Oh, no!
93
00:06:19,320 --> 00:06:22,440
Don't put death on this guy, man.
94
00:06:23,080 --> 00:06:26,940
Sorry. No, no, don't say sorry to me.
Say sorry to the family of Louisa.
95
00:06:27,450 --> 00:06:31,490
of joanne and jose because they they
lost they lost their three beautiful
96
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newborn children if you don't want to
get expelled here's what you need to do
97
00:06:34,330 --> 00:06:37,370
number one when school starts up on
monday i need you to go into your
98
00:06:37,370 --> 00:06:40,430
principal's office and i need you to
tell her you apologize i need you to
99
00:06:40,430 --> 00:06:43,790
confess that you're the one who pulled
the fire alarm from there the principal
100
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will decide what's going to happen to
you okay i mean top level prank and best
101
00:06:48,030 --> 00:06:52,410
believe he ain't ever gonna do it again
but now he'll forever think
102
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It's his fault that three people died.
103
00:06:58,720 --> 00:07:00,200
I mean, it's not a laughing matter.
104
00:07:00,420 --> 00:07:03,380
But, I mean, I guess we can laugh
because it's not real, but still.
105
00:07:03,800 --> 00:07:06,220
My man just topped him off like it was
nothing.
106
00:07:06,560 --> 00:07:08,100
Get that, my G.
107
00:07:09,220 --> 00:07:11,800
Oh, father -in -law, it's a madness.
108
00:07:12,180 --> 00:07:14,120
Why did my uncle touch me when I was
seven?
109
00:07:14,500 --> 00:07:15,500
And then 17?
110
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And then last week?
111
00:07:17,280 --> 00:07:18,280
Why did you do that?
112
00:07:23,180 --> 00:07:25,380
My uncle is going to get weak enough to
where I can touch him back.
113
00:07:29,740 --> 00:07:33,340
I had, like, eight abortions this year.
114
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Damn.
115
00:07:36,540 --> 00:07:38,500
I had two abortions this year.
116
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Oh, okay.
117
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I'm judging.
118
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I'm judging.
119
00:07:47,660 --> 00:07:49,300
Sweat a goddamn condom.
120
00:07:54,359 --> 00:07:55,940
I don't believe in the moon.
121
00:07:56,480 --> 00:07:57,480
What?
122
00:07:58,440 --> 00:08:00,900
What's that white thing in the sky?
123
00:08:02,020 --> 00:08:03,560
We're all just high as fuck.
124
00:08:05,720 --> 00:08:11,640
We're all just high as hell. You know
somebody that actually made good music,
125
00:08:11,680 --> 00:08:12,680
man? Lizzo.
126
00:08:13,260 --> 00:08:14,260
Lizzo?
127
00:08:14,760 --> 00:08:16,760
Yeah, bro. Have you heard? Lizzo's sick.
128
00:08:17,200 --> 00:08:18,560
Like, that's a songwriter, yo.
129
00:08:19,720 --> 00:08:26,700
Can't get past the fact that she looks
like the shit emoji What
130
00:08:26,700 --> 00:08:33,600
oh My god, you know when you're driving
and you see
131
00:08:33,600 --> 00:08:38,159
that water puddle ahead of you and it
goes away, you know Yeah Yeah, what is
132
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No, it's a mirage Come on man
133
00:08:57,930 --> 00:09:02,090
oh my god put it on already what the
hell
134
00:09:02,090 --> 00:09:11,610
okay
135
00:09:11,610 --> 00:09:17,650
i don't know if that was a proposal or
an exorcism because what
136
00:09:17,650 --> 00:09:22,450
the was that i don't want to go into
conspiracy theories and all that with y
137
00:09:22,450 --> 00:09:25,370
'all because like maybe some of y 'all
ain't on that level yet but
138
00:09:26,510 --> 00:09:28,490
Have you guys ever seen a fat woman go
missing?
139
00:09:33,330 --> 00:09:34,510
Oh, man.
140
00:09:35,750 --> 00:09:36,870
Come on, bro.
141
00:09:38,130 --> 00:09:39,310
Are you okay?
142
00:09:40,470 --> 00:09:41,970
Top guys are too expensive.
143
00:09:42,230 --> 00:09:44,290
Somebody needs to open up for a few
niggas or something.
144
00:09:45,330 --> 00:09:46,330
What?
145
00:09:51,670 --> 00:09:53,550
Oh, because they did the acquisition.
146
00:09:54,050 --> 00:09:55,610
So it's like Warner Brothers and
Netflix.
147
00:10:19,530 --> 00:10:22,690
Fuck you know
148
00:10:33,580 --> 00:10:35,580
I was expecting a DJ cut.
149
00:10:36,020 --> 00:10:37,060
We the best.
150
00:11:02,320 --> 00:11:05,660
Nah, let them fight for it. Nah, don't,
don't do that.
151
00:11:06,300 --> 00:11:08,320
Oh! Oh, okay.
152
00:11:10,440 --> 00:11:11,440
Motivational now.
153
00:11:20,520 --> 00:11:21,720
You look wonderful.
154
00:11:22,400 --> 00:11:23,740
I'm a strict photographer.
155
00:11:24,000 --> 00:11:25,420
Can I take a picture of you?
156
00:11:26,020 --> 00:11:27,020
Yes, of course.
157
00:11:27,440 --> 00:11:28,440
Thank you.
158
00:11:31,720 --> 00:11:32,760
Set him up, man.
159
00:11:33,260 --> 00:11:35,860
No, no, I'm sorry, what?
160
00:11:42,720 --> 00:11:47,140
Just cut it off, man.
161
00:11:47,380 --> 00:11:48,700
Just cut it off!
162
00:12:02,990 --> 00:12:04,850
Yeah, just keep it pushing, man.
163
00:12:08,430 --> 00:12:09,430
Fuck!
164
00:12:11,290 --> 00:12:12,850
She turned back!
165
00:12:17,950 --> 00:12:20,510
Whoa! Oh, man.
166
00:12:37,640 --> 00:12:40,020
Well, they all wonder it'll turn back
167
00:12:40,020 --> 00:12:54,820
I
168
00:12:54,820 --> 00:12:58,860
take it this way. I take in these people
169
00:13:04,810 --> 00:13:08,730
My dad's here. I'm not sure where he's
sitting. Pretty sure he's over there.
170
00:13:08,730 --> 00:13:10,030
see the guy in the orange shirt?
171
00:13:11,270 --> 00:13:14,210
Over there? Yeah, it's the dude next to
him. It's my dad.
172
00:13:14,770 --> 00:13:16,870
It's his birthday, and I'm coming here.
It's surprising.
173
00:13:17,670 --> 00:13:19,530
And so I was, yeah, yeah.
174
00:13:20,290 --> 00:13:21,290
Oh, no.
175
00:13:21,490 --> 00:13:23,570
I'm going to sit here a minute, but it's
okay if we do it now.
176
00:13:23,850 --> 00:13:26,710
And then I'm going to wait here for a
second, and then once y 'all go up to
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00:13:28,050 --> 00:13:29,390
Okay. Yeah.
178
00:13:48,850 --> 00:13:49,910
Happy birthday, Dad!
179
00:13:50,410 --> 00:13:51,490
It's good to see you!
180
00:13:52,770 --> 00:13:54,930
Good to see you, Dad.
181
00:13:55,210 --> 00:13:56,430
Alright, thank y 'all. That was amazing.
182
00:13:56,810 --> 00:13:57,810
Thank you, man.
183
00:13:58,450 --> 00:13:59,450
Alright, thank y 'all.
184
00:14:00,870 --> 00:14:01,870
I'll see you, Dad.
185
00:14:02,690 --> 00:14:03,690
Oh my God.
186
00:14:43,739 --> 00:14:44,739
Fair.
187
00:14:47,700 --> 00:14:48,700
Fair.
188
00:14:51,200 --> 00:14:52,200
True.
189
00:14:55,900 --> 00:14:58,220
Can I see it? Can I see it?
190
00:14:58,800 --> 00:15:00,160
I wanted to see it.
191
00:15:00,380 --> 00:15:01,840
I'm going to fucking see it, bro.
192
00:15:04,720 --> 00:15:10,440
I could fight law You were staring
directly You
193
00:15:10,440 --> 00:15:20,600
guys
194
00:15:20,600 --> 00:15:25,440
want some money to get a hotel room for
tonight
195
00:15:33,180 --> 00:15:34,340
Oh my god.
196
00:15:36,260 --> 00:15:36,860
Fuck
197
00:15:36,860 --> 00:15:43,640
sake.
198
00:15:48,380 --> 00:15:51,540
I'm guessing he actually gave them
money, surely.
199
00:15:51,840 --> 00:15:52,840
Right?
200
00:15:53,660 --> 00:15:54,660
Right?
201
00:16:02,350 --> 00:16:04,130
And what about mine? Sweet!
202
00:16:12,530 --> 00:16:13,530
Sweet!
203
00:16:14,890 --> 00:16:15,890
Sweet!
204
00:16:16,910 --> 00:16:18,710
No, not even two.
205
00:16:51,850 --> 00:16:53,530
I'm leaving next year. I'm leaving the
Riverland.
206
00:16:54,030 --> 00:16:55,030
Who are you?
207
00:16:55,850 --> 00:16:59,970
Yeah, I'm Darren. I'm leaving next year.
We don't really give a... Who cares?
208
00:17:00,830 --> 00:17:02,230
Really? Enjoy it.
209
00:17:05,530 --> 00:17:06,530
What?
210
00:17:08,490 --> 00:17:09,490
Oh,
211
00:17:11,810 --> 00:17:13,190
no, not like that. Not like that.
212
00:17:13,710 --> 00:17:15,430
I mean like that. I mean like that.
213
00:17:20,680 --> 00:17:21,720
Oh, man.
214
00:17:22,359 --> 00:17:23,359
That's crazy.
215
00:17:23,400 --> 00:17:24,400
Nah, that's crazy.
216
00:17:24,619 --> 00:17:29,160
If you will go to the gym, what machine
would you use to impress a lady?
217
00:17:29,820 --> 00:17:30,820
ATM machine.
218
00:17:33,380 --> 00:17:34,380
Funny guy.
219
00:17:35,280 --> 00:17:36,780
Funny guy.
220
00:17:37,000 --> 00:17:41,460
You can tell he hasn't been to the gym
before, though, because there aren't ATM
221
00:17:41,460 --> 00:17:43,780
machines at gyms.
222
00:17:44,240 --> 00:17:45,240
Anyway.
223
00:17:46,480 --> 00:17:47,480
Ooh.
224
00:17:48,860 --> 00:17:49,860
Don't make...
225
00:17:59,850 --> 00:18:00,850
That's crazy.
226
00:18:03,150 --> 00:18:08,410
No, bro. You don't. Why are you beefing
us? Why are you beefing the audience?
227
00:18:08,870 --> 00:18:11,210
Have a go at the person who finished
you.
228
00:18:12,470 --> 00:18:16,290
Warning, the following video might be
too white for black people.
229
00:18:16,510 --> 00:18:17,950
Viewer discretion is advised. What?
230
00:18:22,590 --> 00:18:27,090
Okay. No, that is... No, that's
disgusting.
231
00:18:28,110 --> 00:18:29,230
That's disgusting.
232
00:18:29,570 --> 00:18:33,810
No, that's... No, that's pissed me off.
233
00:18:54,360 --> 00:18:55,400
There's no way.
234
00:18:55,620 --> 00:18:57,140
Come on.
235
00:19:01,780 --> 00:19:05,520
Nah, that's not mental health. You're
just dumb at that point.
236
00:19:12,140 --> 00:19:13,140
Oh.
237
00:19:13,620 --> 00:19:14,620
Come on, man.
238
00:19:19,140 --> 00:19:21,040
Bro, what was that?
239
00:19:22,300 --> 00:19:24,980
Oh. The disappointment, man.
240
00:19:27,420 --> 00:19:29,340
I'm going to have to carry this
motherfucker.
241
00:19:30,020 --> 00:19:31,020
God damn.
242
00:19:31,580 --> 00:19:35,000
Have any of you played paddle and you're
just there like, man, I'm going to have
243
00:19:35,000 --> 00:19:38,280
to do all the work. My teammate ain't
doing shit. If you've never felt like
244
00:19:38,280 --> 00:19:40,000
that, it's because you're the shit one.
245
00:19:41,760 --> 00:19:46,340
You're the one that's like, yo, I just
keep winning and I ain't even doing
246
00:19:47,560 --> 00:19:48,800
Now you know why.
247
00:19:50,730 --> 00:19:51,729
I'm an underground rapper.
248
00:19:51,730 --> 00:19:54,710
Can you give me three words? I'll make a
freestyle right now. Okay.
249
00:19:55,470 --> 00:19:56,470
I don't know, Matt.
250
00:19:58,330 --> 00:19:59,330
Juice.
251
00:20:02,030 --> 00:20:03,950
Alright, I'm ready for this. Here we go.
252
00:20:07,010 --> 00:20:08,010
Be Todd.
253
00:20:20,270 --> 00:20:21,270
Come on, man.
254
00:20:24,130 --> 00:20:25,130
Is that it?
255
00:20:25,190 --> 00:20:26,190
Is that all we're getting?
256
00:20:27,490 --> 00:20:30,230
My mind's still standing. Wait for him
to go.
257
00:20:31,530 --> 00:20:32,950
What's your life advice?
258
00:20:34,890 --> 00:20:35,890
Life advice?
259
00:20:37,870 --> 00:20:42,110
Just because you don't give up doesn't
mean you will make it.
260
00:20:43,330 --> 00:20:44,930
Damn. Fuck.
261
00:20:58,969 --> 00:20:59,969
Come on.
262
00:21:00,390 --> 00:21:03,890
You proud of yourself? You happy with
that? That's on the internet forever
263
00:21:04,110 --> 00:21:05,110
You've done that.
264
00:21:05,170 --> 00:21:06,089
I'm going, yeah.
265
00:21:06,090 --> 00:21:08,170
What a banger. Was it worth the likes?
266
00:21:13,050 --> 00:21:14,670
Wait, I think it's muted.
267
00:21:15,030 --> 00:21:17,550
All right, well, Mo, this clip's muted.
Oh, okay.
268
00:21:17,990 --> 00:21:18,990
Okay, yeah.
269
00:21:28,840 --> 00:21:30,240
Well, thank you for watching anyway.
270
00:21:30,440 --> 00:21:34,920
Some funny clips in there. I will see
you all in a bit. Do not subscribe. And
271
00:21:34,920 --> 00:21:35,920
peace.
18852
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