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1
00:01:43,000 --> 00:01:45,150
- Merry Christmas!
- Merry Christmas!
2
00:05:43,690 --> 00:05:46,060
Penguin sighting! Man or myth?
3
00:05:46,280 --> 00:05:49,440
What is he? Today's edition.
Another penguin sighting.
4
00:05:49,530 --> 00:05:52,200
Another penguin sighting! Check it out!
5
00:05:52,370 --> 00:05:56,950
Penguin man living in Gotham's sewers!
Read all about the latest sighting!
6
00:06:01,880 --> 00:06:04,280
May I have your attention, Gotham City?
7
00:06:04,550 --> 00:06:07,670
It is time for tonight's lighting of the tree.
8
00:06:12,430 --> 00:06:13,920
How about that?
9
00:06:30,290 --> 00:06:33,150
Part man, part penguin! All horrifying!
10
00:06:33,920 --> 00:06:36,620
Find out for only 50 cents! Come on!
11
00:06:37,090 --> 00:06:41,160
Read about the possible terror
beneath our feet! Check it out!
12
00:06:41,420 --> 00:06:42,920
Read about it!
13
00:06:45,550 --> 00:06:47,710
Missing link between man and bird.
14
00:06:47,810 --> 00:06:49,130
My dear boy...
15
00:06:49,310 --> 00:06:52,260
...sometimes it's a diversion
to read such rubbish.
16
00:06:52,440 --> 00:06:54,600
Usually, it's a waste of time.
17
00:06:54,770 --> 00:06:58,220
Whatever. Today's issue!
"The Penguin: Man or myth?"
18
00:06:59,150 --> 00:07:01,690
The Globe! Right here! 25 cents!
19
00:07:26,310 --> 00:07:27,970
Well, here's hoping.
20
00:07:28,150 --> 00:07:31,840
With luck, Gotham will have its first
merry Christmas in years.
21
00:07:32,020 --> 00:07:34,590
I feel almost vulgar at Yuletide...
22
00:07:34,990 --> 00:07:37,190
...mentioning the new power plant.
23
00:07:37,360 --> 00:07:41,140
But if we're to break ground
when we must, I'll need permits...
24
00:07:41,490 --> 00:07:45,030
...variances, tax incentives.
That sort of pesky nonsense.
25
00:07:46,500 --> 00:07:47,950
Power plant?
26
00:07:48,170 --> 00:07:52,660
Studies show we've enough power to get
us into the middle of the next century.
27
00:07:52,840 --> 00:07:57,290
Your analysts foresee growth
at 1% per annum. That's not growth... that's a mild swelling.
28
00:07:59,060 --> 00:08:00,210
Imagine...
29
00:08:00,520 --> 00:08:02,010
...a Gotham City...
30
00:08:02,730 --> 00:08:06,140
...of the future, lit up like a blanket
of stars...
31
00:08:06,690 --> 00:08:08,970
...but blinking on and off...
32
00:08:09,360 --> 00:08:11,560
...embarrassingly low on juice.
33
00:08:11,820 --> 00:08:13,150
Frankly...
34
00:08:13,910 --> 00:08:15,810
...I cringe, Mr. Mayor.
35
00:08:16,990 --> 00:08:19,820
Sorry, any plans must go
to the usual committees...
36
00:08:19,910 --> 00:08:21,910
...through the usual channels.
37
00:08:22,000 --> 00:08:23,820
Um... I have a suggestion.
38
00:08:31,760 --> 00:08:32,830
Well...
39
00:08:33,760 --> 00:08:36,670
...actually, really, just more like a question.
40
00:08:38,850 --> 00:08:42,300
I'm afraid we haven't
properly housebroken Ms. Kyle.
41
00:08:43,190 --> 00:08:45,140
In the plus column, though...
42
00:08:45,280 --> 00:08:47,060
...she makes a hell of a cup of coffee.
43
00:08:55,750 --> 00:08:56,610
Dad.
44
00:08:57,620 --> 00:09:01,280
Mr. Mayor. Time to go down
and bring joy to the masses.
45
00:09:11,970 --> 00:09:13,720
"Actually, more of a question."
46
00:09:13,810 --> 00:09:15,630
You stupid corn dog.
47
00:09:16,900 --> 00:09:18,640
Corn dog, corn dog.
48
00:09:45,800 --> 00:09:49,800
I have enough signatures
from Shreck employees to warrant a recall.
49
00:09:49,980 --> 00:09:52,510
That's not a threat, just simple numbers.
50
00:09:52,600 --> 00:09:56,720
Maybe. But you sure as hell
don't have an issue or a candidate.
51
00:09:57,990 --> 00:10:00,140
Thank you, ladies and gentlemen.
52
00:10:01,070 --> 00:10:04,320
From those of us at City Hall
to each and every one of you...
53
00:10:04,410 --> 00:10:05,860
...happy holidays.
54
00:10:06,660 --> 00:10:11,160
We have with us a man who needs
no introduction, he's given us so much.
55
00:10:12,000 --> 00:10:15,450
Please welcome Gotham's
own Santa Claus, Max Shreck.
56
00:10:37,070 --> 00:10:39,900
Pick up those contracts for Personnel and...
57
00:10:40,080 --> 00:10:42,860
...pick up the dry cleaning
and paper towels...
58
00:10:45,750 --> 00:10:46,660
Darn!
59
00:10:52,590 --> 00:10:54,080
I forgot my speech.
60
00:10:54,260 --> 00:10:56,930
Remind me to take it out
on what's-her-name.
61
00:11:01,270 --> 00:11:02,720
Santa Claus?
62
00:11:02,940 --> 00:11:04,260
Afraid not.
63
00:11:05,440 --> 00:11:07,970
I'm just a poor schmo. Got lucky.
64
00:11:09,570 --> 00:11:10,890
Sue me...
65
00:11:11,450 --> 00:11:13,480
...if I want to give some back.
66
00:11:16,450 --> 00:11:19,400
I only wish I could hand out more
than just...
67
00:11:19,580 --> 00:11:21,240
...expensive baubles.
68
00:11:22,460 --> 00:11:25,200
I wish I could hand out world peace...
69
00:11:25,960 --> 00:11:28,200
...and unconditional love...
70
00:11:29,760 --> 00:11:31,790
...wrapped in a big bow.
71
00:11:33,430 --> 00:11:35,090
Oh, but you can.
72
00:11:35,640 --> 00:11:37,340
Oh, but you will.
73
00:11:44,280 --> 00:11:45,810
Merry Christmas.
74
00:11:59,290 --> 00:12:00,700
Great idea.
75
00:12:01,340 --> 00:12:02,440
Not mine.
76
00:12:55,070 --> 00:12:57,430
What are you waiting for? The signal!
77
00:13:28,770 --> 00:13:31,930
We want the big guy!
The guy who runs the show!
78
00:13:34,690 --> 00:13:35,850
What do you want?
79
00:13:35,950 --> 00:13:37,220
Not you!
80
00:13:38,120 --> 00:13:39,110
Shreck!
81
00:13:39,530 --> 00:13:41,530
You'll have to go through me.
82
00:13:43,460 --> 00:13:45,360
Dad, go! Save yourself!
83
00:13:45,620 --> 00:13:46,610
Dad, go!
84
00:15:40,920 --> 00:15:42,200
Shut up!
85
00:15:50,350 --> 00:15:53,020
Take one step closer, Mr. Manbat, and I'll...
86
00:15:58,950 --> 00:16:00,100
You missed.
87
00:16:13,300 --> 00:16:14,700
The Batman.
88
00:16:15,460 --> 00:16:17,460
Or is it just "Batman"?
89
00:16:21,760 --> 00:16:23,460
Your choice, of course.
90
00:16:25,770 --> 00:16:27,260
Well, that was...
91
00:16:27,600 --> 00:16:28,930
...very brief.
92
00:16:29,440 --> 00:16:31,600
Just like all the men in my life.
93
00:16:32,440 --> 00:16:33,770
What men?
94
00:16:34,570 --> 00:16:35,590
Well...
95
00:16:36,610 --> 00:16:39,900
...then again, there's you.
But you need therapy.
96
00:17:01,640 --> 00:17:05,470
Thanks for saving the day, Batman.
The Circus Gang is back.
97
00:17:05,650 --> 00:17:06,810
We'll see.
98
00:17:06,980 --> 00:17:10,390
They almost made off with our mover
and shaker, Max Shreck.
99
00:17:11,150 --> 00:17:13,230
Where is that insufferable son of a bitch?
100
00:18:30,580 --> 00:18:33,530
I believe the word you're looking for is...
101
00:18:44,680 --> 00:18:47,460
Actually, this is all just a bad dream.
102
00:18:48,600 --> 00:18:50,430
You're at home in bed...
103
00:18:50,600 --> 00:18:53,510
...heavily sedated, resting comfortably...
104
00:18:54,110 --> 00:18:57,850
...dying from the carcinogens
you've personally spewed...
105
00:18:58,950 --> 00:19:01,430
...in a lifetime of profiteering.
106
00:19:01,780 --> 00:19:03,190
Tragic irony...
107
00:19:03,370 --> 00:19:05,190
...or poetic justice?
108
00:19:05,370 --> 00:19:06,820
You tell me.
109
00:19:08,040 --> 00:19:09,780
My God, it's true.
110
00:19:10,210 --> 00:19:12,280
Penguin Man of the sewer.
111
00:19:16,550 --> 00:19:18,670
Odd as it may seem, Max...
112
00:19:19,640 --> 00:19:22,380
...you and I have something in common:
113
00:19:24,560 --> 00:19:27,040
We're both perceived as monsters.
114
00:19:31,400 --> 00:19:32,930
But somehow...
115
00:19:34,320 --> 00:19:36,990
...you're a well-respected monster...
116
00:19:37,320 --> 00:19:39,320
...and I am, to date...
117
00:19:40,330 --> 00:19:41,570
...not!
118
00:19:41,830 --> 00:19:45,280
Frankly, I feel that's a bum rap.
I'm a businessman.
119
00:19:45,670 --> 00:19:47,030
Tough, yes.
120
00:19:47,210 --> 00:19:50,620
Shrewd, okay. But that does not
make me a monster.
121
00:19:51,380 --> 00:19:53,710
Don't embarrass yourself, Max!
122
00:19:54,010 --> 00:19:55,880
I know all about you.
123
00:19:56,180 --> 00:19:58,300
What you hide, I discover.
124
00:19:59,390 --> 00:20:01,510
What you put in your toilet...
125
00:20:01,690 --> 00:20:04,550
...I place on my mantle. Get the picture?
126
00:20:05,230 --> 00:20:07,510
Is that supposed to hypnotize me?
127
00:20:07,730 --> 00:20:10,300
No, just give you a splitting headache.
128
00:20:11,200 --> 00:20:12,600
It's not working.
129
00:20:13,740 --> 00:20:15,440
Oh, you big baby!
130
00:20:16,040 --> 00:20:17,360
Just blanks.
131
00:20:17,580 --> 00:20:20,700
Would I go through all this trouble
just to kill you?
132
00:20:20,920 --> 00:20:22,190
No, Max.
133
00:20:22,580 --> 00:20:25,070
I have an entirely other purpose.
134
00:20:26,260 --> 00:20:27,830
I'm ready, Max.
135
00:20:28,380 --> 00:20:30,670
I've been down here too long.
136
00:20:31,050 --> 00:20:33,340
It's time for me to ascend...
137
00:20:34,060 --> 00:20:35,760
...to re-emerge...
138
00:20:37,430 --> 00:20:38,970
...with your help...
139
00:20:39,100 --> 00:20:40,720
...your know-how...
140
00:20:40,900 --> 00:20:42,430
...your savvy.
141
00:20:43,270 --> 00:20:45,940
I wasn't born in the sewer, you know.
142
00:20:47,070 --> 00:20:48,600
I come from...
143
00:20:49,280 --> 00:20:50,610
...like you.
144
00:20:50,910 --> 00:20:53,470
And, like you, I want some respect!
145
00:20:54,250 --> 00:20:56,810
A recognition of my basic humanity.
146
00:20:57,620 --> 00:20:59,070
But most of all...
147
00:21:00,090 --> 00:21:02,450
...I want to find out who I am...
148
00:21:02,630 --> 00:21:04,620
...by finding my parents...
149
00:21:04,800 --> 00:21:06,920
...learning my human name.
150
00:21:07,800 --> 00:21:11,750
Simple stuff that the good people
of Gotham take for granted!
151
00:21:13,270 --> 00:21:14,430
And...
152
00:21:14,600 --> 00:21:17,350
...exactly why am I going to help you?
153
00:21:19,150 --> 00:21:20,310
Well...
154
00:21:24,990 --> 00:21:26,440
Let's start.
155
00:21:34,630 --> 00:21:36,990
Let's see what we have in here.
156
00:21:41,180 --> 00:21:43,250
A batch of toxic waste...
157
00:21:44,470 --> 00:21:46,950
...from your clean textile plant!
158
00:21:47,850 --> 00:21:51,090
There's a whole lagoon of this crud
in the back!
159
00:21:51,310 --> 00:21:53,470
It could have come from anywhere.
160
00:21:53,900 --> 00:21:58,390
What about the documents that prove you
own half of the firetraps in Gotham City?
161
00:21:58,650 --> 00:22:00,810
If there were such documents...
162
00:22:00,990 --> 00:22:02,770
...that's not an admission...
163
00:22:02,870 --> 00:22:04,900
...they would've been shredded.
164
00:22:05,790 --> 00:22:07,150
Good idea.
165
00:22:08,540 --> 00:22:12,450
A lot of tape and a little patience
make all the difference.
166
00:22:15,300 --> 00:22:16,790
By the way...
167
00:22:17,300 --> 00:22:19,700
...how's Fred Atkins, your old partner?
168
00:22:19,970 --> 00:22:21,130
Fred?
169
00:22:22,220 --> 00:22:23,880
Fred's actually...
170
00:22:24,480 --> 00:22:27,590
I believe he's on an extended vacation.
He's good.
171
00:22:31,150 --> 00:22:32,310
Good.
172
00:22:34,320 --> 00:22:37,190
Hiya, Max. Remember me?
I'm Fred's hand!
173
00:22:38,490 --> 00:22:41,060
Want to greet any other body parts?
174
00:22:41,410 --> 00:22:43,070
Remember, Max...
175
00:22:43,330 --> 00:22:45,610
...you flush it, I flaunt it.
176
00:22:47,250 --> 00:22:49,650
You know what, Mr. Penguin, sir?
177
00:22:55,010 --> 00:22:56,590
I think, perhaps...
178
00:22:56,760 --> 00:23:00,170
...I could help orchestrate
a "Welcome Home" scenario for you.
179
00:23:00,270 --> 00:23:03,720
Once we're both back home,
perhaps we could help each other.
180
00:23:04,940 --> 00:23:07,470
You won't regret this, Mr. Shreck.
181
00:23:15,370 --> 00:23:17,030
Honey, I'm home!
182
00:23:19,210 --> 00:23:21,570
Oh, I forgot. I'm not married.
183
00:23:32,140 --> 00:23:33,550
Miss Kitty.
184
00:23:35,060 --> 00:23:38,510
Back from more sexual escapades
you refuse to share?
185
00:23:40,900 --> 00:23:42,720
Not that I'd ever pry.
186
00:23:44,650 --> 00:23:46,060
Drink your dinner.
187
00:23:52,660 --> 00:23:53,820
What?
188
00:23:55,330 --> 00:23:57,660
How can anyone be so pathetic?
189
00:23:59,170 --> 00:24:02,250
Yes, to you I seem pathetic,
but I'm a working girl.
190
00:24:02,420 --> 00:24:06,250
Must pay the rent. Maybe if you
chipped in instead of stepping out.
191
00:24:08,100 --> 00:24:11,590
Selina, dear, it's your mother.
Just calling to say hello.
192
00:24:11,770 --> 00:24:13,090
Yeah, but...
193
00:24:13,270 --> 00:24:16,600
But I'm disappointed you're not
coming home for Christmas.
194
00:24:16,690 --> 00:24:20,180
I want to discuss why you insist
on languishing in Gotham City...
195
00:24:20,280 --> 00:24:22,270
...as some lowly secretary.
196
00:24:22,450 --> 00:24:24,100
Lowly assistant.
197
00:24:26,030 --> 00:24:29,190
Selina, about that Christmas getaway
we planned...
198
00:24:30,290 --> 00:24:35,120
I'll be going alone. Dr. Shaw says I need
to be my own person, not an appendage.
199
00:24:39,550 --> 00:24:41,120
Some appendage!
200
00:24:46,640 --> 00:24:50,380
The party never stops
on Selina Kyle's answering machine.
201
00:24:52,480 --> 00:24:55,560
I should've let him win
that last racquetball game.
202
00:24:55,900 --> 00:24:56,890
Hello...
203
00:24:57,070 --> 00:24:58,560
...Selina Kyle.
204
00:24:58,740 --> 00:25:02,150
We're calling to tell you about exciting,
new Gotham Lady perfume.
205
00:25:02,240 --> 00:25:06,820
It makes women feel like women...
and the men have no complaints either.
206
00:25:09,170 --> 00:25:13,740
This is yourself reminding you to come
all the way back to the office...
207
00:25:15,130 --> 00:25:18,750
...if you forgot the Bruce Wayne file...
- You stupid corn dog!
208
00:25:38,410 --> 00:25:39,860
Working late?
209
00:25:42,250 --> 00:25:46,320
I'm just boning up for your Bruce Wayne
meeting in the morning.
210
00:25:47,040 --> 00:25:50,540
I pulled all the files
on the proposed power plant...
211
00:25:53,050 --> 00:25:57,300
...and Mr. Wayne's hoped-for investment.
I even opened the protected files...
212
00:25:58,560 --> 00:25:59,920
How industrious!
213
00:26:01,600 --> 00:26:03,930
How did you open the protected files?
214
00:26:04,940 --> 00:26:06,100
May I ask?
215
00:26:11,740 --> 00:26:15,980
I figured your password was "Geraldo,"
your Chihuahua, and it was.
216
00:26:23,750 --> 00:26:28,040
This is all very interesting,
though a bit on the technical side...
217
00:26:30,300 --> 00:26:33,920
...about how the power plant
is a power plant in name only...
218
00:26:34,270 --> 00:26:37,590
...since, in fact, it's going to be a big,
giant...
219
00:26:38,140 --> 00:26:40,260
...big, giant... capacitor.
220
00:26:42,940 --> 00:26:46,940
And, instead of generating power,
it'll be sucking power from...
221
00:26:47,820 --> 00:26:49,270
...Gotham City...
222
00:26:50,450 --> 00:26:51,980
...and storing it...
223
00:26:52,620 --> 00:26:54,280
...stockpiling it...
224
00:26:54,660 --> 00:26:57,620
...which is a very novel approach, I'd say.
225
00:27:00,500 --> 00:27:02,120
Who'd you say this to?
226
00:27:05,800 --> 00:27:06,790
Nobody.
227
00:27:13,140 --> 00:27:15,630
What did curiosity do to the cat?
228
00:27:17,860 --> 00:27:19,270
I'm no cat.
229
00:27:20,190 --> 00:27:22,020
I'm just an assistant.
230
00:27:22,490 --> 00:27:23,650
A secretary.
231
00:27:24,200 --> 00:27:26,020
And a very good one.
232
00:27:26,870 --> 00:27:28,140
Too good?
233
00:27:29,370 --> 00:27:30,440
Listen...
234
00:27:30,540 --> 00:27:32,700
...it's our secret. Honest.
235
00:27:33,000 --> 00:27:35,830
How can you be so mean
to someone so meaningless?
236
00:27:36,000 --> 00:27:37,490
This power plant...
237
00:27:38,010 --> 00:27:40,710
...is my legacy. It's what I leave behind.
238
00:27:40,880 --> 00:27:42,160
For Chip.
239
00:27:42,510 --> 00:27:44,630
Nothing must prevent that.
240
00:27:48,180 --> 00:27:52,130
Go ahead. Intimidate me.
Bully me, if it makes you feel big.
241
00:27:52,560 --> 00:27:54,560
It's not like you can kill me!
242
00:27:54,980 --> 00:27:57,350
Actually, it's a lot like that.
243
00:28:15,260 --> 00:28:18,000
For a second, you really frightened me.
244
00:28:28,690 --> 00:28:29,850
Really?
245
00:29:45,570 --> 00:29:46,890
Honey, I'm home!
246
00:29:50,160 --> 00:29:52,230
Oh, I forgot. I'm not married.
247
00:30:28,200 --> 00:30:30,950
Selina, this is your mother. Call me.
248
00:30:32,210 --> 00:30:36,120
Selina, this is your mother.
Why haven't you called me back?
249
00:30:36,750 --> 00:30:38,540
Hello, Selina Kyle.
250
00:30:39,380 --> 00:30:42,830
We're just calling to make sure
you've tried Gotham Lady perfume.
251
00:30:42,930 --> 00:30:47,170
One whiff of this and your boss
will ask you to stay after work...
252
00:30:47,390 --> 00:30:50,090
...for a candlelight staff meeting for two.
253
00:30:50,270 --> 00:30:54,260
Gotham Lady perfume.
Exclusively at Shreck's department store.
254
00:33:38,630 --> 00:33:41,920
I don't know about you,
Miss Kitty, but I feel...
255
00:33:42,720 --> 00:33:44,500
...so much yummier.
256
00:34:03,160 --> 00:34:04,740
Ladies and gentlemen:
257
00:34:06,580 --> 00:34:11,490
I stand before you again to denounce
the urban chaos we live with in our city.
258
00:34:12,750 --> 00:34:14,160
It's got to stop.
259
00:34:14,340 --> 00:34:17,370
It's going to stop!
Our community is coming apart...
260
00:34:17,640 --> 00:34:20,920
...in a season when
it should be coming together.
261
00:34:21,010 --> 00:34:24,590
I don't care what the cynics may say.
This is the Christmas season...
262
00:34:24,690 --> 00:34:26,340
...and should be a healing time.
263
00:34:26,440 --> 00:34:29,000
I say that not only as an official...
264
00:34:29,860 --> 00:34:32,020
...but as a husband and a father.
265
00:34:32,440 --> 00:34:34,930
Last night's violence won't happen again.
266
00:34:38,280 --> 00:34:41,360
I'm not good at speeches,
so I'll just say, "Thanks. "
267
00:34:50,130 --> 00:34:52,420
It's the hideous Penguin Man.
268
00:34:52,970 --> 00:34:55,590
Take the baby. Just don't hurt me, please!
269
00:35:48,530 --> 00:35:52,610
This was the remarkable scene
only minutes ago in Gotham Plaza.
270
00:35:52,790 --> 00:35:56,280
The mysterious Penguin saving the life
of the mayor's baby...
271
00:35:56,460 --> 00:36:00,200
...and announcing his presence.
- All I want in return...
272
00:36:01,090 --> 00:36:02,710
...is a chance...
273
00:36:03,050 --> 00:36:05,170
...to find my mom and dad.
274
00:36:06,930 --> 00:36:09,550
A chance to find out who they are...
275
00:36:10,770 --> 00:36:12,220
...and thusly...
276
00:36:12,560 --> 00:36:14,010
...who I am.
277
00:36:14,770 --> 00:36:16,100
And then...
278
00:36:16,400 --> 00:36:18,260
...with my parents...
279
00:36:18,570 --> 00:36:20,730
...try to understand... why.
280
00:36:22,280 --> 00:36:25,770
Why they did what I guess
they felt they had to do...
281
00:36:27,950 --> 00:36:29,610
...to a child...
282
00:36:30,290 --> 00:36:31,910
...who was born...
283
00:36:34,960 --> 00:36:36,870
...a little different.
284
00:36:38,760 --> 00:36:39,860
A child...
285
00:36:40,430 --> 00:36:42,960
...who spent his first Christmas...
286
00:36:43,930 --> 00:36:45,760
...and many since...
287
00:36:47,310 --> 00:36:48,630
...in a sewer.
288
00:36:48,810 --> 00:36:51,050
Mr. Wayne? Something wrong?
289
00:36:54,650 --> 00:36:55,810
His parents.
290
00:36:55,990 --> 00:36:58,310
This scene, direct from Gotham Plaza.
291
00:36:59,780 --> 00:37:01,480
I hope he finds them.
292
00:37:02,490 --> 00:37:06,440
Here he is, standing alongside
Gotham's leading citizen, Max Shreck.
293
00:37:06,620 --> 00:37:09,490
How about a statement?
People want to know.
294
00:37:20,350 --> 00:37:23,510
- Penguin's not to be disturbed!
- It's a public place!
295
00:37:23,640 --> 00:37:26,180
- Walk. Now. Move.
- Freedom of the press!
296
00:37:26,270 --> 00:37:27,800
Wait a minute.
297
00:37:28,940 --> 00:37:32,270
What about the freedom
to rediscover your roots...
298
00:37:32,780 --> 00:37:34,770
...with dignity and privacy?
299
00:37:34,950 --> 00:37:37,270
Is the Penguin a personal friend?
300
00:37:37,450 --> 00:37:41,110
He's a personal friend of the whole city,
so have a heart.
301
00:37:41,370 --> 00:37:44,160
Give the Constitution a rest.
It's Christmas.
302
00:38:23,670 --> 00:38:27,500
"Red Triangle Circus put on
a swell show with fierce lions.
303
00:38:31,720 --> 00:38:34,090
"Circus returns for a two-week...
304
00:38:34,350 --> 00:38:35,840
"Kids will love..."
305
00:38:36,350 --> 00:38:37,430
Thanks.
306
00:38:41,730 --> 00:38:42,760
It's cold!
307
00:38:42,860 --> 00:38:44,270
It's vichyssoise.
308
00:38:45,450 --> 00:38:47,190
It's supposed to be cold.
309
00:38:49,740 --> 00:38:53,030
"Circus is back with a freak show,
may not be suitable for kids...
310
00:38:53,120 --> 00:38:55,200
"...featuring a poodle lady...
311
00:38:55,460 --> 00:38:57,450
"...the world's fattest man...
312
00:38:57,710 --> 00:38:59,830
"...and Aquatic Bird Boy."
313
00:39:00,960 --> 00:39:03,500
Why are you determined to prove...
314
00:39:03,760 --> 00:39:06,630
...that this Penguin is not what he seems?
315
00:39:07,050 --> 00:39:10,130
Must you be the only lonely "man-beast"
in town?
316
00:39:10,390 --> 00:39:12,470
"The circus folded its tents yesterday...
317
00:39:12,560 --> 00:39:15,760
"...after reports of missing children
in several towns.
318
00:39:15,980 --> 00:39:18,970
"Police have closed down
the Red Triangle fairgrounds.
319
00:39:19,070 --> 00:39:22,760
"However, at least one
freak-show performer vanished before...
320
00:39:23,240 --> 00:39:25,400
"...he could be questioned."
321
00:39:27,160 --> 00:39:29,150
I suppose you feel better now.
322
00:39:32,000 --> 00:39:32,990
No.
323
00:39:34,290 --> 00:39:36,290
Actually, I feel worse.
324
00:39:54,820 --> 00:39:56,310
Why're you still out?
325
00:39:56,400 --> 00:40:00,310
Are you concerned about that strange,
heroic Penguin person?
326
00:40:02,030 --> 00:40:04,400
I think he knows who his parents are.
327
00:40:06,250 --> 00:40:08,030
There's something else.
328
00:42:04,300 --> 00:42:05,540
Mr. Penguin...
329
00:42:05,640 --> 00:42:08,250
A penguin is a bird that cannot fly!
330
00:42:09,970 --> 00:42:11,380
I am a man!
331
00:42:12,560 --> 00:42:14,090
I have a name!
332
00:42:18,070 --> 00:42:19,770
Oswald Cobblepot!
333
00:42:21,650 --> 00:42:24,520
You'll never be able to settle with them?
334
00:42:28,000 --> 00:42:29,150
True.
335
00:42:30,250 --> 00:42:32,490
I was their "Number-One" son...
336
00:42:32,830 --> 00:42:35,400
...and they treated me like number two.
337
00:42:36,340 --> 00:42:38,740
But it's human nature to fear...
338
00:42:40,260 --> 00:42:41,670
...the unusual.
339
00:42:42,680 --> 00:42:44,050
Perhaps...
340
00:42:44,510 --> 00:42:46,050
...when I held my...
341
00:42:46,180 --> 00:42:48,180
...Tiffany baby rattle...
342
00:42:49,190 --> 00:42:51,260
...with a shiny flipper...
343
00:42:51,690 --> 00:42:54,260
...instead of five chubby digits...
344
00:42:55,780 --> 00:42:57,440
...they freaked.
345
00:43:01,200 --> 00:43:02,980
But I forgive them.
346
00:43:04,700 --> 00:43:07,700
"Penguin forgives parents!
'I'm at peace with myself and the world!
347
00:43:07,790 --> 00:43:10,360
"'Don't need hands as long
as you got heart.
348
00:43:10,500 --> 00:43:13,700
"'My heart is filled with love.
I feel five feet tall."'
349
00:43:13,800 --> 00:43:17,740
- He's like a frog that became a prince.
- No, he's more like a penguin.
350
00:43:23,390 --> 00:43:25,720
Now, now, pretty little thing.
351
00:43:26,150 --> 00:43:27,680
Nice and easy.
352
00:43:31,990 --> 00:43:36,730
I love a big, strong man who's not afraid
to show it with someone half his size.
353
00:43:39,200 --> 00:43:41,530
Be gentle, it's my first time.
354
00:43:48,760 --> 00:43:50,210
Tic-tac-toe.
355
00:43:55,680 --> 00:43:57,920
You make it easy, don't you?
356
00:43:58,430 --> 00:44:01,180
Always waiting for some Batman
to save you.
357
00:44:04,070 --> 00:44:05,720
I am Catwoman...
358
00:44:06,860 --> 00:44:08,520
...hear me roar.
359
00:44:22,880 --> 00:44:26,960
I'd offer you coffee, but my assistant
is using her vacation time.
360
00:44:27,090 --> 00:44:31,880
Good time. Everyone but the bandits'll
be slacking off till after the New Year.
361
00:44:32,470 --> 00:44:34,630
I'm not sure I like the inference.
362
00:44:34,730 --> 00:44:36,630
I didn't realize I made one.
363
00:44:41,400 --> 00:44:45,480
I'm pushing this power plant now
because it'll cost more later.
364
00:44:46,070 --> 00:44:48,310
A million saved is a million earned.
365
00:44:49,120 --> 00:44:51,900
I commissioned this report.
Take a look at it.
366
00:44:54,330 --> 00:44:57,990
Gotham City has a power surplus.
I'm sure you know that.
367
00:44:58,590 --> 00:45:00,160
My question is:
368
00:45:01,090 --> 00:45:02,250
What's your angle?
369
00:45:02,340 --> 00:45:04,960
"Power surplus?" Bruce, shame on you!
370
00:45:05,850 --> 00:45:09,130
No such thing. One can never have
too much power.
371
00:45:09,430 --> 00:45:12,510
If my life has a meaning,
that's the meaning.
372
00:45:14,400 --> 00:45:18,470
I'll fight you. I've already spoken
to the mayor and we agree.
373
00:45:18,650 --> 00:45:20,140
Mayors come and go.
374
00:45:20,360 --> 00:45:22,230
Blue bloods tire easily.
375
00:45:22,530 --> 00:45:25,010
Can you go 15 rounds
with Muhammad Shreck?
376
00:45:25,240 --> 00:45:27,230
I guess we'll find out.
377
00:45:27,540 --> 00:45:30,570
Of course, I don't have a crime boss
like Cobblepot in my corner.
378
00:45:30,670 --> 00:45:33,030
"Crime boss?" Shows what you know...
379
00:45:33,170 --> 00:45:35,990
..."Mr. To-The-Manor-Born-
With-A-Silver-Spoon."
380
00:45:36,090 --> 00:45:38,370
Oswald is Gotham's new golden boy.
381
00:45:38,630 --> 00:45:42,290
If his parents hadn't 86'ed him,
you'd have been bunkies at prep school.
382
00:45:42,390 --> 00:45:46,420
He controls the Red Triangle Gang.
I can't prove it yet, but we both...
383
00:45:46,600 --> 00:45:49,270
I'll not stand for mud-slinging here.
384
00:45:49,440 --> 00:45:52,810
If my assistant was here,
she'd have already escorted you out...
385
00:45:52,900 --> 00:45:54,430
Anywhere he wants.
386
00:45:54,690 --> 00:45:57,260
Preferably some nightspot grotto...
387
00:45:58,610 --> 00:45:59,610
...or...
388
00:46:00,070 --> 00:46:01,900
...secluded hideaway.
389
00:46:03,910 --> 00:46:05,280
Nice suit.
390
00:46:11,590 --> 00:46:15,790
That's my name, don't wear it out
or I'll make you buy me a new one.
391
00:46:20,100 --> 00:46:21,760
This is Bruce...
392
00:46:22,140 --> 00:46:23,220
...Wayne.
393
00:46:24,020 --> 00:46:25,120
We've met.
394
00:46:25,650 --> 00:46:26,640
Have we?
395
00:46:26,810 --> 00:46:29,970
No, I'm sorry. I mistook me
for somebody else.
396
00:46:31,490 --> 00:46:33,190
You mean, "mistook me."
397
00:46:33,950 --> 00:46:35,940
Isn't that what I said?
398
00:46:36,620 --> 00:46:38,230
I don't think so.
399
00:46:39,620 --> 00:46:40,860
What happened?
400
00:46:42,120 --> 00:46:45,070
Did you hurt yourself... on that ski slope?
401
00:46:46,630 --> 00:46:49,960
Is that why you cut short your vacation?
Came back?
402
00:46:53,260 --> 00:46:54,710
It's a blur.
403
00:46:56,180 --> 00:47:00,760
Not complete amnesia. I remember
Sister Mary Margaret puking in church...
404
00:47:01,690 --> 00:47:04,170
...and Betsy saying
it was morning sickness.
405
00:47:04,270 --> 00:47:07,430
And the time I forgot to wear
my underpants to school...
406
00:47:07,530 --> 00:47:11,360
...and the name of the boy who noticed
was Ricky Friedburg.
407
00:47:12,370 --> 00:47:13,900
He's dead now.
408
00:47:14,290 --> 00:47:15,780
But last night...
409
00:47:16,000 --> 00:47:17,700
...complete blur.
410
00:47:19,500 --> 00:47:21,410
Couldn't you just die?
411
00:47:25,550 --> 00:47:26,870
Please...
412
00:47:28,050 --> 00:47:29,670
...show out Mr. Wayne.
413
00:47:30,010 --> 00:47:31,380
With pleasure.
414
00:47:33,890 --> 00:47:35,760
Your coat, Mr. Wayne.
415
00:47:49,660 --> 00:47:52,900
You don't seem like the type
who does business with Shreck.
416
00:47:53,000 --> 00:47:55,740
No. You don't seem like the type
to take orders from him.
417
00:47:55,830 --> 00:47:57,240
Well, that's a...
418
00:47:57,500 --> 00:47:59,040
...long story.
419
00:47:59,840 --> 00:48:01,960
I could free up some time.
420
00:48:03,760 --> 00:48:05,750
- I'm listed.
- I'm tempted.
421
00:48:06,010 --> 00:48:07,200
I'm working.
422
00:48:08,520 --> 00:48:09,760
I'm leaving.
423
00:48:10,270 --> 00:48:12,260
You buy that blurry business?
424
00:48:12,440 --> 00:48:13,510
Women.
425
00:48:13,940 --> 00:48:15,800
Nothing surprises me...
426
00:48:16,360 --> 00:48:18,180
...except your late mother.
427
00:48:18,780 --> 00:48:21,600
Who'd have thought Selina
had a brain to damage?
428
00:48:21,780 --> 00:48:23,230
Bottom line?
429
00:48:23,620 --> 00:48:27,610
She tries to blackmail me,
I'll drop her out of a higher window.
430
00:48:27,790 --> 00:48:28,950
Meantime...
431
00:48:29,040 --> 00:48:31,410
...l've got badder fish to fry.
432
00:48:42,970 --> 00:48:44,300
Oswald...
433
00:48:44,890 --> 00:48:46,220
...it's Max.
434
00:48:59,570 --> 00:49:00,980
You're home?
435
00:49:08,420 --> 00:49:09,740
How've you been?
436
00:49:11,420 --> 00:49:13,290
Your extended family?
437
00:49:13,760 --> 00:49:15,370
Good to have a family.
438
00:49:17,180 --> 00:49:19,340
I'd rather not be disturbed now.
439
00:49:19,680 --> 00:49:22,590
Come on downstairs, Oswald.
I have a surprise.
440
00:49:22,770 --> 00:49:24,760
I don't like surprises.
441
00:49:41,790 --> 00:49:42,780
Come on.
442
00:49:55,810 --> 00:49:57,050
Don't peek.
443
00:49:59,230 --> 00:50:00,630
You'll spoil it.
444
00:50:24,010 --> 00:50:27,170
Adulation is a cross to bear.
God knows I know.
445
00:50:28,340 --> 00:50:32,040
But someone's got to supplant our
standing in the way of progress, Mayor.
446
00:50:32,140 --> 00:50:35,680
And don't deny it, Mr. Cobblepot,
you've got the magic.
447
00:50:35,850 --> 00:50:39,350
Your charisma's bigger than both of us.
Come on down.
448
00:50:41,530 --> 00:50:42,710
Mayor?
449
00:50:43,860 --> 00:50:45,050
Mayor.
450
00:50:47,120 --> 00:50:50,280
Elections happen in November.
It's late December.
451
00:50:50,450 --> 00:50:51,780
Don't worry.
452
00:50:51,950 --> 00:50:55,530
I want you to meet Jen and Josh,
my image consultants.
453
00:50:57,130 --> 00:50:58,280
Here.
454
00:50:58,460 --> 00:51:00,450
Reclaim your birthright.
455
00:51:03,090 --> 00:51:04,360
I'm Jen.
456
00:51:07,930 --> 00:51:12,430
Okay, let's see. What I'd like to do first
is put these gloves on you.
457
00:51:12,770 --> 00:51:15,760
Our research tells us
that voters like fingers.
458
00:51:15,940 --> 00:51:18,510
So if we were to just lose this...
459
00:51:20,110 --> 00:51:22,060
We'll do it another time.
460
00:51:23,780 --> 00:51:27,190
Not a lot of reflective surfaces
in the sewer, huh?
461
00:51:38,630 --> 00:51:40,540
Still, it could be worse.
462
00:51:41,300 --> 00:51:43,670
My nose could be gushing blood.
463
00:51:47,440 --> 00:51:49,510
What do you mean by that?
464
00:51:54,490 --> 00:51:56,520
Everybody, back to work!
465
00:51:57,320 --> 00:51:58,810
Let's make...
466
00:51:59,490 --> 00:52:00,900
...a mayor!
467
00:52:06,500 --> 00:52:09,490
You're right, we missed
the regular election...
468
00:52:09,670 --> 00:52:12,410
...but elected officials can be recalled,
impeached...
469
00:52:12,510 --> 00:52:15,180
...given the boot. Look at Nixon, Agnew.
470
00:52:15,340 --> 00:52:16,880
Then think of you...
471
00:52:17,010 --> 00:52:19,750
...Oswald Cobblepot, filling the void.
472
00:52:20,520 --> 00:52:22,300
I'd like to fill her void.
473
00:52:24,850 --> 00:52:29,100
We'll need signatures to overturn
the ballot. I can supply those.
474
00:52:29,690 --> 00:52:33,600
- Teach her my French flipper trick.
- We need one more thing.
475
00:52:35,990 --> 00:52:37,400
A platform?
476
00:52:38,870 --> 00:52:43,280
Stop global warming. Start global cooling.
Make the world an icebox.
477
00:52:43,710 --> 00:52:48,000
I like it. But to get the mayor recalled,
we must have a catalyst.
478
00:52:48,550 --> 00:52:50,870
"You're doing great, Mayor Cobblepot."
479
00:52:51,510 --> 00:52:54,290
"Your table is ready, Mayor Cobblepot."
480
00:52:55,010 --> 00:52:57,760
"I need you, Oswald. I need you now! "
481
00:52:59,690 --> 00:53:02,680
"That's the biggest parasol I've ever seen."
482
00:53:04,190 --> 00:53:08,440
Soon an incident like the Gulf of Tonkin,
or the Reichstag fire...
483
00:53:15,910 --> 00:53:18,400
You want my old friends up there...
484
00:53:18,580 --> 00:53:21,250
...to drive the mayor into a foaming frenzy?
485
00:53:21,420 --> 00:53:23,290
- Exactly.
- Sounds fun.
486
00:53:24,090 --> 00:53:25,160
But...
487
00:53:26,010 --> 00:53:28,630
...I mustn't get sidetracked, Maxie.
488
00:53:29,100 --> 00:53:31,250
I have my own things to tend to.
489
00:53:31,600 --> 00:53:35,090
"Sidetracked?" This is your chance
to fulfill your destiny...
490
00:53:35,270 --> 00:53:37,830
...that your parents carelessly discarded.
491
00:53:41,780 --> 00:53:43,850
Reclaim my birthright, you mean?
492
00:53:44,030 --> 00:53:47,020
Imagine, as mayor,
you have the ear of the media...
493
00:53:47,280 --> 00:53:50,150
...access to the captains of industry...
494
00:53:50,700 --> 00:53:52,610
...unlimited poontang.
495
00:53:56,210 --> 00:53:58,610
You drive a hard bargain, Maxie.
496
00:53:59,960 --> 00:54:01,790
All right, I'll be mayor.
497
00:54:05,800 --> 00:54:07,500
Burn, baby, burn!
498
00:56:49,790 --> 00:56:51,860
- Who is she?
- What is she?
499
00:56:52,290 --> 00:56:55,240
I don't know whether to open fire
or fall in love.
500
00:56:55,960 --> 00:56:57,450
You poor guys.
501
00:56:57,630 --> 00:57:00,910
Always confusing your pistols
with your privates.
502
00:57:03,260 --> 00:57:06,000
Don't hurt us. Our take-home's
less than $300.
503
00:57:06,100 --> 00:57:08,130
You're overpaid. Hit the road.
504
00:57:26,500 --> 00:57:28,320
Go ahead and hit me.
505
00:58:06,710 --> 00:58:08,410
Admiring your handiwork?
506
00:58:10,670 --> 00:58:12,660
Touring the riot scene.
507
00:58:14,180 --> 00:58:16,710
Gravely assessing the devastation.
508
00:58:18,890 --> 00:58:20,880
"Upstanding-Mayor" stuff.
509
00:58:25,100 --> 00:58:26,680
You're not the mayor.
510
00:58:28,570 --> 00:58:30,100
Things change.
511
00:58:32,110 --> 00:58:33,520
What do you want?
512
00:58:34,410 --> 00:58:36,230
The direct approach.
513
00:58:36,580 --> 00:58:39,140
I admire that in a man with a mask.
514
00:58:44,210 --> 00:58:46,910
You don't really think you'll win, do you?
515
00:58:49,760 --> 00:58:51,290
Things change.
516
00:59:16,460 --> 00:59:18,740
I saw her first. Got to fly.
517
01:00:08,270 --> 01:00:10,510
How could you? I'm a woman!
518
01:00:11,270 --> 01:00:12,510
I'm sorry.
519
01:00:26,540 --> 01:00:30,450
As I was saying, I'm a woman
and can't be taken for granted.
520
01:00:32,130 --> 01:00:34,370
Life's a bitch, now so am I.
521
01:00:51,400 --> 01:00:52,560
Who are you?
522
01:00:53,230 --> 01:00:55,190
Who's the man behind the bat?
523
01:00:57,240 --> 01:00:59,310
Maybe you can help me find...
524
01:00:59,830 --> 01:01:01,230
...the woman...
525
01:01:01,910 --> 01:01:03,490
...behind the cat.
526
01:01:06,250 --> 01:01:08,030
No, that's not you.
527
01:01:11,670 --> 01:01:13,000
There you are.
528
01:01:29,030 --> 01:01:30,930
Saved by Kitty Litter.
529
01:01:34,950 --> 01:01:36,220
Bastard!
530
01:01:53,550 --> 01:01:54,630
Alfred...
531
01:01:55,390 --> 01:01:57,960
...bring me some antiseptic ointment.
532
01:01:58,140 --> 01:02:00,300
Coming. Are you in pain, sir?
533
01:02:03,150 --> 01:02:04,470
Not really.
534
01:02:26,840 --> 01:02:29,460
I may have saved the mayor's baby...
535
01:02:31,100 --> 01:02:33,580
...but I refuse to save a mayor...
536
01:02:33,770 --> 01:02:36,510
...who stood by, helpless as a baby...
537
01:02:36,940 --> 01:02:39,890
...while Gotham was ravaged
by a disease...
538
01:02:40,980 --> 01:02:44,270
...that turned Eagle Scouts
into crazed clowns...
539
01:02:45,780 --> 01:02:48,520
...and happy homemakers into catwomen.
540
01:02:49,700 --> 01:02:50,810
Thank you.
541
01:02:54,000 --> 01:02:58,330
Oswald Cobblepot, the mystery man-beast,
made his bid to run Gotham.
542
01:03:01,340 --> 01:03:05,840
Mr. Cobblepot, you are the coolest
role model a young person could have.
543
01:03:06,470 --> 01:03:08,950
And you're the hottest young person...
544
01:03:09,140 --> 01:03:11,300
...a role model could have.
545
01:03:13,810 --> 01:03:14,840
Here.
546
01:03:15,860 --> 01:03:17,390
Wear a button.
547
01:03:18,860 --> 01:03:21,020
Let me just get it on here.
548
01:03:25,660 --> 01:03:26,990
Thank you.
549
01:03:31,840 --> 01:03:36,330
This mayor stuff is not about power,
it's about reaching out to people...
550
01:03:36,510 --> 01:03:38,580
...touching people, groping people.
551
01:03:38,680 --> 01:03:40,590
- Penguin...
- My name is not Penguin!
552
01:03:40,680 --> 01:03:42,590
It's Oswald Cobblepot.
553
01:03:43,220 --> 01:03:46,090
Oswald, there's somebody here to see you.
554
01:03:54,400 --> 01:03:57,070
Just the pussy I've been looking for.
555
01:04:01,870 --> 01:04:03,700
It's chilly in here.
556
01:04:04,870 --> 01:04:06,200
I'll warm you.
557
01:04:06,580 --> 01:04:08,080
Down, Oswald.
558
01:04:10,420 --> 01:04:11,870
We need to talk.
559
01:04:12,050 --> 01:04:13,410
You see...
560
01:04:13,590 --> 01:04:16,330
...you and I have something in common.
561
01:04:16,600 --> 01:04:18,250
Sounds familiar.
562
01:04:18,760 --> 01:04:20,840
Appetite for destruction?
563
01:04:21,060 --> 01:04:23,380
Contempt for the czars of fashion?
564
01:04:23,730 --> 01:04:25,550
Wait, don't tell me.
565
01:04:25,770 --> 01:04:27,680
Naked sexual charisma?
566
01:04:29,240 --> 01:04:30,480
Batman.
567
01:04:31,610 --> 01:04:33,860
The thorn in both our sides.
568
01:04:34,570 --> 01:04:36,610
The fly in our ointment.
569
01:04:37,240 --> 01:04:38,570
Ointment?
570
01:04:39,080 --> 01:04:41,450
I've got scented and unscented.
571
01:04:41,960 --> 01:04:43,740
I'll come back later.
572
01:04:44,250 --> 01:04:48,110
Perchance, are you a registered voter?
I'm a mayoral prospect.
573
01:04:48,300 --> 01:04:50,670
I have but one pet cause today:
574
01:04:51,640 --> 01:04:53,090
Ban the Bat.
575
01:04:53,600 --> 01:04:57,670
Oh, him again. No bother.
He's already history. Check it out.
576
01:04:58,390 --> 01:05:02,810
We'll disassemble his Batmobile
and turn it into an H-bomb on wheels.
577
01:05:06,320 --> 01:05:08,800
He'd have even more power as a martyr.
578
01:05:09,070 --> 01:05:13,530
To destroy Batman, we must first
turn him into what he hates the most.
579
01:05:14,160 --> 01:05:15,570
Namely, us.
580
01:05:17,500 --> 01:05:18,820
Frame him?
581
01:05:19,000 --> 01:05:22,160
Not even in office yet
and already an enemies list.
582
01:05:24,010 --> 01:05:26,620
Those names are not for prying eyes.
583
01:05:28,510 --> 01:05:31,300
Why should I trust some catbroad anyway?
584
01:05:32,520 --> 01:05:36,680
Maybe you're a screwed-up sorority chick
getting back at her daddy...
585
01:05:36,860 --> 01:05:40,390
...for not buying her that pony
when she turned sweet-sixteen.
586
01:05:57,630 --> 01:05:59,080
Nice birdie.
587
01:06:14,480 --> 01:06:15,890
Nice kitty.
588
01:06:16,400 --> 01:06:17,810
Nice kitty.
589
01:06:24,660 --> 01:06:26,650
Batman napalmed my arm.
590
01:06:27,250 --> 01:06:31,410
He knocked me off a building just
when I started to feel good about myself.
591
01:06:31,500 --> 01:06:34,660
I want to play an integral part
in his degradation.
592
01:06:38,840 --> 01:06:40,590
A plan is forming.
593
01:06:48,610 --> 01:06:49,970
I want in.
594
01:06:52,280 --> 01:06:55,520
The thought of busting Batman
makes me feel all...
595
01:06:57,620 --> 01:06:58,690
...dirty.
596
01:07:02,790 --> 01:07:05,860
Maybe I'll just give myself a bath
right here.
597
01:07:16,760 --> 01:07:18,630
I challenge the mayor...
598
01:07:18,810 --> 01:07:22,630
...to re-light the Christmas tree
in Gotham Plaza tomorrow night.
599
01:07:23,810 --> 01:07:28,520
Sir, shall we change the channel
to a program with some dignity and class?
600
01:07:29,150 --> 01:07:31,390
The Love Connection perhaps?
601
01:07:33,820 --> 01:07:36,020
...not that I have any faith in the mayor.
602
01:07:36,120 --> 01:07:37,990
But I hope and pray...
603
01:07:38,330 --> 01:07:39,780
...that Batman...
604
01:07:39,960 --> 01:07:42,780
...will be present to preserve the peace.
605
01:07:44,130 --> 01:07:45,290
Subtle.
606
01:07:48,840 --> 01:07:50,790
Why are you doing this?
607
01:07:53,010 --> 01:07:54,170
Selina?
608
01:07:56,350 --> 01:07:58,680
Sorry, I didn't mean to scare you.
609
01:07:58,850 --> 01:08:01,520
Scare me? I was just scaring myself.
610
01:08:02,360 --> 01:08:04,350
I don't see how, but...
611
01:08:04,650 --> 01:08:07,940
It's nice to see you in the real world,
away from Shreck.
612
01:08:09,490 --> 01:08:11,190
It's nice to be here.
613
01:08:14,540 --> 01:08:15,990
Are you all right?
614
01:08:18,000 --> 01:08:21,120
You look like you have the holiday blues
or something.
615
01:08:24,010 --> 01:08:26,080
Boy, the news these days.
616
01:08:27,050 --> 01:08:28,040
Weird!
617
01:08:29,810 --> 01:08:32,920
I heard on TV that Catwoman
weighs 140 pounds.
618
01:08:35,060 --> 01:08:37,220
How do these hacks sleep at night?
619
01:08:37,400 --> 01:08:40,180
It's not even accurate. "Batman blows it"?
620
01:08:40,530 --> 01:08:43,560
He probably saved millions
in property damage alone.
621
01:08:44,860 --> 01:08:48,530
You're not going to the re-lighting
of the tree, are you?
622
01:08:48,740 --> 01:08:51,070
I wouldn't be caught dead there.
623
01:08:52,250 --> 01:08:55,530
It's going to be a hot time
in the cold town tonight.
624
01:08:57,590 --> 01:09:00,370
You got kind of a dark side, don't you?
625
01:09:01,050 --> 01:09:02,580
No darker than yours.
626
01:09:06,770 --> 01:09:10,050
Why don't you come over
and we can watch it on TV?
627
01:09:10,440 --> 01:09:12,590
The tree-lighting ceremony.
628
01:09:12,900 --> 01:09:15,770
I can't. I have to be somewhere tonight.
629
01:09:16,610 --> 01:09:19,060
How about coming for dinner at five?
630
01:09:19,240 --> 01:09:20,560
Let's say six?
631
01:09:21,740 --> 01:09:22,520
Five.
632
01:09:22,620 --> 01:09:24,070
Five. You and me.
633
01:09:31,750 --> 01:09:34,870
The tree lights up
and then I push the button.
634
01:09:35,210 --> 01:09:36,370
Wait, wait.
635
01:09:36,550 --> 01:09:39,500
I push the button, then the tree lights up.
636
01:09:41,810 --> 01:09:43,260
Who are you?
637
01:09:43,810 --> 01:09:45,300
Talent scout.
638
01:09:45,980 --> 01:09:47,250
Come in.
639
01:09:47,810 --> 01:09:50,890
I don't just light trees.
I'm an actress as well.
640
01:09:53,320 --> 01:09:56,230
What is that thing?
A camera or something?
641
01:09:56,910 --> 01:09:58,230
Say, "Cheese! "
642
01:09:59,990 --> 01:10:00,980
Cheese.
643
01:10:12,670 --> 01:10:13,920
Thanks, Alfred.
644
01:10:15,850 --> 01:10:18,090
I'm sure he's wonderful company...
645
01:10:18,260 --> 01:10:22,010
...but doesn't the "gold-plated-bachelor" bit
get a little stale?
646
01:10:23,270 --> 01:10:26,600
A lot like the "lonely-secretary" syndrome,
I guess.
647
01:10:27,190 --> 01:10:29,020
Executive Assistant.
648
01:10:29,280 --> 01:10:30,270
Sorry.
649
01:10:33,620 --> 01:10:34,940
Secretary.
650
01:10:39,460 --> 01:10:41,030
Any girlfriend?
651
01:10:43,880 --> 01:10:45,040
Sure.
652
01:10:46,300 --> 01:10:48,330
You mean, as in serious?
653
01:10:49,630 --> 01:10:51,500
No. Had one, didn't work.
654
01:10:51,890 --> 01:10:54,000
What went wrong? Hang on!
655
01:10:54,220 --> 01:10:55,630
I think I know!
656
01:10:56,140 --> 01:10:57,800
You kept things from her.
657
01:10:57,890 --> 01:10:59,510
I told her everything.
658
01:11:00,730 --> 01:11:02,390
The truth frightened her?
659
01:11:02,480 --> 01:11:04,470
There are two truths...
660
01:11:06,320 --> 01:11:07,640
...you know?
661
01:11:07,990 --> 01:11:11,400
She had trouble reconciling them
because I had trouble...
662
01:11:12,740 --> 01:11:14,320
...reconciling them.
663
01:11:18,330 --> 01:11:19,580
Vicki thought...
664
01:11:19,670 --> 01:11:20,660
Vicki?
665
01:11:21,840 --> 01:11:23,660
Ice skater or stewardess?
666
01:11:25,840 --> 01:11:28,170
No, she was a photojournalist.
667
01:11:29,430 --> 01:11:31,420
Was Vicki right about your...
668
01:11:31,600 --> 01:11:33,420
...difficulty with duality?
669
01:11:37,440 --> 01:11:38,680
You see...
670
01:11:39,610 --> 01:11:41,640
...if I say yes, then...
671
01:11:43,360 --> 01:11:45,520
...you'll think of me as a...
672
01:11:45,700 --> 01:11:48,480
...Norman Bates, a Ted Bundy type and...
673
01:11:56,880 --> 01:11:58,870
You might not let me kiss you.
674
01:12:01,720 --> 01:12:05,040
It's the so-called normal guys
who always let you down.
675
01:12:05,220 --> 01:12:08,380
Sickos never scare me.
At least they're committed.
676
01:12:48,520 --> 01:12:49,850
I can't do that.
677
01:12:50,020 --> 01:12:51,260
Neither can I.
678
01:12:51,400 --> 01:12:55,020
This is a special bulletin.
The Ice Princess has been kidnapped.
679
01:12:56,110 --> 01:13:00,320
Can you confirm reports of Batman's
suspected involvement in the abduction?
680
01:13:01,370 --> 01:13:04,110
The evidence is purely circumstantial.
681
01:13:04,500 --> 01:13:09,080
This was found, stained with blood,
in the missing girl's dressing room.
682
01:13:10,670 --> 01:13:13,070
- I must go.
- No, it's your house.
683
01:13:13,510 --> 01:13:17,040
Hold on. Just sit for a second and relax.
I'll be right back.
684
01:13:27,820 --> 01:13:30,020
I've got to go to the plaza.
685
01:13:30,200 --> 01:13:33,480
- He is begging me to show.
- I hoped you'd snub him.
686
01:13:33,660 --> 01:13:37,230
I can't. There's been a kidnapping.
Here's what I want you to do.
687
01:13:37,330 --> 01:13:38,320
Shit!
688
01:13:42,170 --> 01:13:45,330
Tell Selina, Ms. Kyle,
I had to go out of town.
689
01:13:46,550 --> 01:13:50,120
Tell her that a big business deal came up...
You know what?
690
01:13:50,680 --> 01:13:54,250
Let her know, not in some kind of dumb,
"be-my-girlfriend" way...
691
01:13:54,350 --> 01:13:56,170
I'll relay the message.
692
01:14:01,190 --> 01:14:03,810
Mr. Wayne told me to tell you that...
693
01:14:04,190 --> 01:14:05,600
Bruce, yes...
694
01:14:06,900 --> 01:14:08,770
Would you tell him...
695
01:14:09,030 --> 01:14:12,360
...l've been going through...
a lot of changes and...
696
01:14:14,370 --> 01:14:15,820
Just that...
697
01:14:16,040 --> 01:14:18,030
...this is not a rejection...
698
01:14:18,540 --> 01:14:20,240
...my abruptly leaving.
699
01:14:20,380 --> 01:14:22,780
In fact, he makes me feel the way...
700
01:14:23,380 --> 01:14:25,210
...I hope I really am.
701
01:14:26,930 --> 01:14:30,550
Could you just make up a sonnet or...
a dirty limerick?
702
01:14:31,220 --> 01:14:33,380
One has just sprung to mind.
703
01:14:34,730 --> 01:14:36,260
This way, ma'am.
704
01:15:37,510 --> 01:15:39,080
Ladies and Gentlemen.
705
01:15:39,350 --> 01:15:41,880
Please, may I have your attention?
706
01:15:44,270 --> 01:15:46,550
I know that to many of you...
707
01:15:46,850 --> 01:15:49,930
...Gotham seems a bit
beleaguered these days.
708
01:15:50,610 --> 01:15:53,170
But I want you to know
your elected officials...
709
01:15:53,280 --> 01:15:55,350
...and your police department...
710
01:15:55,450 --> 01:15:58,010
...have the situation well in hand.
711
01:16:58,520 --> 01:16:59,590
Got to hurry.
712
01:16:59,690 --> 01:17:00,600
Thank you.
713
01:17:00,690 --> 01:17:02,510
It was set up to look like I did it.
714
01:17:02,610 --> 01:17:06,230
I'll tell the police I was kidnapped
by an ugly birdman with fish breath.
715
01:17:06,320 --> 01:17:07,980
Did somebody say fish?
716
01:17:08,240 --> 01:17:10,400
I haven't been fed all day.
717
01:17:11,240 --> 01:17:12,610
Eat floor.
718
01:17:14,160 --> 01:17:15,320
High fiber.
719
01:17:16,500 --> 01:17:17,820
Hey, stud...
720
01:17:18,000 --> 01:17:21,240
...I thought we had something together.
- We do.
721
01:17:37,230 --> 01:17:39,140
Got to go. Girl talk.
722
01:18:07,560 --> 01:18:11,220
She let me go. I think 'cause I reasoned
with her, girl-to-girl.
723
01:18:13,020 --> 01:18:15,060
Be careful. Don't move.
724
01:18:17,400 --> 01:18:18,770
Lawn dart!
725
01:18:22,870 --> 01:18:25,070
Rats with wings, do your thing.
726
01:18:31,590 --> 01:18:33,410
Batman pushed the Princess!
727
01:18:49,070 --> 01:18:50,340
Hold your fire!
728
01:19:05,380 --> 01:19:07,770
You're catnip to a girl like me.
729
01:19:09,050 --> 01:19:10,790
Handsome, dazed...
730
01:19:12,220 --> 01:19:13,960
...and to die for.
731
01:19:21,890 --> 01:19:24,380
Mistletoe can be deadly if you eat it.
732
01:19:25,150 --> 01:19:26,640
But a kiss...
733
01:19:26,980 --> 01:19:29,550
...can be even deadlier if you mean it.
734
01:19:39,000 --> 01:19:41,910
You're the second man
who's killed me this week.
735
01:19:42,080 --> 01:19:44,080
But I've got seven lives left.
736
01:19:44,250 --> 01:19:45,700
I tried to save you...
737
01:19:45,800 --> 01:19:48,960
Seems like every woman
you try to save ends up dead.
738
01:19:49,340 --> 01:19:51,170
Or deeply resentful.
739
01:19:52,180 --> 01:19:54,090
Maybe you should retire.
740
01:20:17,080 --> 01:20:18,240
Damn.
741
01:20:53,420 --> 01:20:54,870
Outstanding!
742
01:20:55,590 --> 01:20:57,910
You're Beauty and the Beast...
743
01:20:58,420 --> 01:21:01,210
...in one luscious Christmas gift pack.
744
01:21:02,430 --> 01:21:04,830
You said you'd scare the Ice Princess.
745
01:21:04,930 --> 01:21:07,090
She looked pretty scared to me.
746
01:21:09,440 --> 01:21:11,260
A touch of the bubbly?
747
01:21:15,190 --> 01:21:17,270
So what are we waiting for?
748
01:21:17,490 --> 01:21:20,100
Let's consummate our fiendish union.
749
01:21:20,950 --> 01:21:22,110
What?
750
01:21:22,620 --> 01:21:24,070
Oh, come on.
751
01:21:24,620 --> 01:21:26,200
Can't you picture?
752
01:21:26,370 --> 01:21:28,530
It's dark in the mayor's mansion.
753
01:21:28,920 --> 01:21:32,160
I'm bushed, so here you come
into the bedroom...
754
01:21:33,380 --> 01:21:35,460
...twitching your little tail...
755
01:21:35,630 --> 01:21:38,960
...my slippers in one hand,
a dry martini in the other.
756
01:21:39,220 --> 01:21:40,290
Please.
757
01:21:40,810 --> 01:21:42,920
I wouldn't touch you to scratch you.
758
01:21:43,020 --> 01:21:47,340
You lousy minx! I should have you spayed!
You sent out all the signals!
759
01:21:47,980 --> 01:21:50,460
I don't think I like you anymore!
760
01:21:58,490 --> 01:22:00,530
Good-bye, my unintended.
761
01:22:01,040 --> 01:22:02,310
Go to heaven.
762
01:23:02,020 --> 01:23:03,210
There he is!
763
01:23:05,860 --> 01:23:07,600
Don't adjust your sets.
764
01:23:07,820 --> 01:23:09,100
Welcome...
765
01:23:09,370 --> 01:23:12,440
...to the Oswald Cobblepot
School of Driving.
766
01:23:13,830 --> 01:23:16,230
Gentlemen, start your screaming.
767
01:23:50,370 --> 01:23:54,490
This may be a bad time to mention it,
but my license has expired!
768
01:24:11,690 --> 01:24:12,680
Relax.
769
01:24:12,940 --> 01:24:17,350
I'll take care of the squealing, wretched,
pinhead puppets of Gotham!
770
01:25:04,330 --> 01:25:08,410
You must admit I played this stinking city
like a harp from hell!
771
01:25:28,650 --> 01:25:31,020
Helpless old lady at 12:00 high!
772
01:26:08,490 --> 01:26:09,730
That's funny.
773
01:26:18,500 --> 01:26:20,240
Now I'm a little worried.
774
01:26:47,160 --> 01:26:49,030
So he survived. Why worry?
775
01:26:49,200 --> 01:26:52,950
He didn't even lose a limb!
An eyeball! Bladder control!
776
01:26:53,840 --> 01:26:57,250
Listen to them. They've lost faith
in old symbols.
777
01:26:57,880 --> 01:27:00,870
They're ready to bond with you,
the icon of the future.
778
01:27:00,970 --> 01:27:02,880
If it works, don't fix it.
779
01:27:03,140 --> 01:27:05,590
We'll celebrate tonight at my annual ball.
780
01:27:05,680 --> 01:27:07,670
Shreck and Cobblepot...
781
01:27:08,310 --> 01:27:10,430
...the visionary alliance.
782
01:27:30,170 --> 01:27:31,990
When it came time...
783
01:27:32,340 --> 01:27:35,290
...to ensure the safety of our fair city...
784
01:27:36,840 --> 01:27:39,130
...did the mayor have a plan?
785
01:27:40,010 --> 01:27:41,090
No!
786
01:27:42,600 --> 01:27:44,380
He relied on a man.
787
01:27:46,350 --> 01:27:47,680
A Batman.
788
01:27:48,690 --> 01:27:51,600
A ticking time-bomb of a costumed freak...
789
01:27:53,030 --> 01:27:56,020
Our prime concern is
this ghastly grotesque.
790
01:27:56,700 --> 01:27:59,860
But let's not forget about
repairing the Batmobile.
791
01:28:00,120 --> 01:28:02,070
There's security to consider.
792
01:28:02,370 --> 01:28:05,320
We can't just take it to any old body shop.
793
01:28:06,460 --> 01:28:07,540
Security?
794
01:28:07,800 --> 01:28:10,040
Who let Vicki Vale into the Batcave?
795
01:28:10,130 --> 01:28:14,460
I'm working, I turn around and there she is.
"Hi, Vick. Come on in."
796
01:28:23,900 --> 01:28:26,180
- Ready?
- I'll take the stairs.
797
01:28:47,880 --> 01:28:50,790
You ask... am I up here for personal glory?
798
01:28:53,350 --> 01:28:54,420
No.
799
01:29:07,370 --> 01:29:10,110
The glory that I yearn to recapture...
800
01:29:11,370 --> 01:29:13,490
...is the glory of Gotham!
801
01:29:31,640 --> 01:29:33,930
How can this be accomplished?
802
01:29:36,360 --> 01:29:37,680
I know...
803
01:29:37,900 --> 01:29:39,930
...you're all concerned.
804
01:29:42,410 --> 01:29:43,590
Relax.
805
01:29:44,240 --> 01:29:48,650
I'll take care of the squealing, wretched,
pinhead puppets of Gotham.
806
01:29:56,130 --> 01:29:57,700
I didn't say that.
807
01:30:00,090 --> 01:30:03,170
You must admit I played
this stinking city...
808
01:30:04,260 --> 01:30:06,340
...like a harp from hell!
809
01:30:08,100 --> 01:30:09,510
You must admit...
810
01:30:09,690 --> 01:30:13,180
...I played this stinking city
like a harp from hell!
811
01:31:06,590 --> 01:31:10,500
Why is there always someone who brings
eggs and tomatoes to a speech?
812
01:31:34,490 --> 01:31:35,940
There he is!
813
01:32:07,530 --> 01:32:08,900
My babies.
814
01:32:10,200 --> 01:32:11,860
Did you miss me?
815
01:32:25,890 --> 01:32:27,540
Did you miss me?
816
01:32:29,220 --> 01:32:31,090
Great speech, Oswald.
817
01:32:32,350 --> 01:32:34,260
My name is not Oswald!
818
01:32:34,900 --> 01:32:36,390
It's Penguin!
819
01:32:36,690 --> 01:32:38,680
I am not a human being!
820
01:32:39,070 --> 01:32:41,390
I am an animal. Cold-blooded!
821
01:32:42,860 --> 01:32:44,440
Crank the A.C.!
822
01:32:44,660 --> 01:32:47,440
Where are my lists? Bring me the names!
823
01:32:48,500 --> 01:32:49,860
It's time.
824
01:32:50,250 --> 01:32:54,020
These are the names of the first-born sons
of Gotham City.
825
01:32:54,670 --> 01:32:56,330
Just like I was.
826
01:32:56,760 --> 01:32:59,750
And like me, a terrible fate waits for them.
827
01:33:01,590 --> 01:33:04,300
Tonight, while their parents party...
828
01:33:04,930 --> 01:33:07,260
...they'll be dreaming away...
829
01:33:07,690 --> 01:33:09,760
...in their safe cribs...
830
01:33:10,020 --> 01:33:11,890
...their soft beds...
831
01:33:12,270 --> 01:33:14,430
...and we'll snatch them...
832
01:33:14,610 --> 01:33:16,600
...carry them into the sewer...
833
01:33:16,780 --> 01:33:20,060
...and toss them into a deep, dark,
watery grave.
834
01:33:22,120 --> 01:33:23,280
Penguin?
835
01:33:24,040 --> 01:33:26,280
Killing sleeping children...
836
01:33:26,620 --> 01:33:28,370
...isn't that a little...
837
01:33:38,640 --> 01:33:40,210
No, it's a lot.
838
01:33:50,190 --> 01:33:51,520
A reminder.
839
01:33:51,690 --> 01:33:55,690
Tonight is that loathsome party hosted
by the odious Mr. Shreck.
840
01:33:56,030 --> 01:33:58,860
May we RSVP
in the resoundingly negative?
841
01:33:59,580 --> 01:34:00,850
Not interested.
842
01:34:03,040 --> 01:34:04,280
Although...
843
01:34:06,630 --> 01:34:08,700
...Selina Kyle might be there.
844
01:34:31,990 --> 01:34:33,730
Ingenious costume.
845
01:34:34,160 --> 01:34:35,650
Let me guess.
846
01:34:35,830 --> 01:34:37,820
Trust-fund goody-goody?
847
01:34:39,170 --> 01:34:40,570
Feeling good?
848
01:34:41,590 --> 01:34:45,000
You almost made a monster the mayor
of Gotham City.
849
01:34:45,420 --> 01:34:47,750
I am the light of this city...
850
01:34:48,090 --> 01:34:50,580
...and I am its mean, twisted soul.
851
01:34:51,010 --> 01:34:52,750
Does it matter who's mayor?
852
01:34:52,850 --> 01:34:54,040
It does to me.
853
01:34:54,430 --> 01:34:55,590
Yawn.
854
01:35:33,900 --> 01:35:36,300
I'm sorry about yesterday, but I had...
855
01:35:36,440 --> 01:35:39,890
...a pretty big deal come through.
Fall through, actually.
856
01:35:40,070 --> 01:35:42,940
It's okay. I had to go home
and feed my cat.
857
01:35:51,920 --> 01:35:53,580
No hard feelings then?
858
01:35:56,090 --> 01:35:57,500
Actually...
859
01:35:59,630 --> 01:36:01,540
...semi-hard, I'd say.
860
01:36:07,770 --> 01:36:11,260
There's a big, comfy California King
over in Bedding.
861
01:36:12,820 --> 01:36:14,470
Why don't we...
862
01:36:15,610 --> 01:36:17,480
Take off our costumes?
863
01:36:20,990 --> 01:36:23,150
I'm tired of wearing masks.
864
01:36:24,000 --> 01:36:25,240
Me too.
865
01:36:26,670 --> 01:36:28,410
Let me ask you something.
866
01:36:29,670 --> 01:36:31,370
Why'd you come tonight?
867
01:36:32,010 --> 01:36:34,000
- You first.
- To see you.
868
01:36:36,470 --> 01:36:37,460
Lovely.
869
01:36:39,140 --> 01:36:42,380
I wish I could say the same,
but I came for Max.
870
01:36:45,350 --> 01:36:46,970
Do you mean you...
871
01:36:47,310 --> 01:36:48,680
Not you and Max?
872
01:36:50,150 --> 01:36:51,560
Me and Max?
873
01:36:58,160 --> 01:36:59,900
No. This and Max.
874
01:37:03,170 --> 01:37:07,290
Don't tell me killing Max
won't solve anything, because it will.
875
01:37:08,380 --> 01:37:11,710
Aren't you tired of this
sanctimonious robber baron...
876
01:37:11,880 --> 01:37:14,790
...coming out on top when
he should be six feet under?
877
01:37:14,890 --> 01:37:19,050
You may have problems with your boss,
but who do you think you are?
878
01:37:22,060 --> 01:37:24,310
I don't know anymore, Bruce.
879
01:37:38,830 --> 01:37:40,990
A kiss under the mistletoe.
880
01:37:44,260 --> 01:37:46,410
"Mistletoe can be deadly if you eat it."
881
01:37:46,510 --> 01:37:48,750
"But a kiss can be even deadlier...
882
01:37:51,260 --> 01:37:52,800
"...if you mean it."
883
01:38:03,110 --> 01:38:04,520
Oh, my God.
884
01:38:05,450 --> 01:38:07,980
Does this mean we have to start fighting?
885
01:38:09,030 --> 01:38:10,610
Let's go outside.
886
01:38:46,490 --> 01:38:48,570
- Are you okay?
- I'm all right.
887
01:38:56,760 --> 01:38:58,660
You didn't invite me...
888
01:38:58,930 --> 01:39:00,580
...so I crashed!
889
01:39:04,140 --> 01:39:05,210
What do you want?
890
01:39:05,310 --> 01:39:07,130
Right now, my troops...
891
01:39:07,390 --> 01:39:09,640
...are fanning out across town...
892
01:39:09,900 --> 01:39:11,720
...for your children!
893
01:39:12,020 --> 01:39:13,010
Yes!
894
01:39:13,190 --> 01:39:15,270
For your first-born sons!
895
01:39:16,030 --> 01:39:18,900
The ones you left defenseless at home...
896
01:39:19,200 --> 01:39:21,520
...so you could dress up like jerks...
897
01:39:21,620 --> 01:39:23,740
...get juiced and dance...
898
01:39:24,540 --> 01:39:25,860
...badly!
899
01:39:30,460 --> 01:39:32,450
I've personally come...
900
01:39:33,050 --> 01:39:35,420
...for Gotham's favorite son...
901
01:39:35,630 --> 01:39:37,420
...Mr. Chip Shreck.
902
01:39:38,640 --> 01:39:41,340
You're coming with me,
you Great White Dope...
903
01:39:42,310 --> 01:39:44,630
...to die, way down in the sewer!
904
01:39:45,310 --> 01:39:49,090
Not Chip. If you have any human feeling,
take me instead.
905
01:39:51,400 --> 01:39:53,100
I don't. So, no!
906
01:39:53,570 --> 01:39:54,840
I'm the one you want.
907
01:39:54,950 --> 01:39:58,440
Isn't it Max Shreck who manipulated
and betrayed you?
908
01:39:59,000 --> 01:40:01,070
Isn't it Max, not Chip...
909
01:40:01,670 --> 01:40:05,160
...you want to see immersed
to his eyeballs in raw sewage?
910
01:40:10,170 --> 01:40:11,920
Okay, you got a point.
911
01:40:12,260 --> 01:40:15,000
I'll let the little prince live, for now.
912
01:40:15,260 --> 01:40:16,450
In the duck!
913
01:40:43,960 --> 01:40:46,120
This is going to be good...
914
01:40:46,880 --> 01:40:50,630
...to cut down a whole crop
of Gotham's most promising...
915
01:40:51,720 --> 01:40:53,380
...before their prime.
916
01:40:55,730 --> 01:40:58,290
You ask me... how do I lure them in?
917
01:41:02,440 --> 01:41:04,810
A little "Pied Penguin" action.
918
01:41:07,410 --> 01:41:09,890
And you get to watch them sink...
919
01:41:10,750 --> 01:41:12,570
...into a deep puddle...
920
01:41:12,750 --> 01:41:15,280
...of your industrial by-products.
921
01:41:16,130 --> 01:41:17,230
Then...
922
01:41:17,460 --> 01:41:19,080
...you join them.
923
01:41:52,960 --> 01:41:55,530
Hurry up and get those kids loaded.
924
01:42:05,140 --> 01:42:07,130
Right this way, kiddies.
925
01:42:07,690 --> 01:42:09,180
Come with me.
926
01:42:25,670 --> 01:42:27,990
So where are all the children?
927
01:42:32,010 --> 01:42:33,330
"Dear Penguin:
928
01:42:33,550 --> 01:42:36,670
"The children regret
they're unable to attend.
929
01:42:37,220 --> 01:42:38,540
"Batman! "
930
01:42:52,070 --> 01:42:53,850
My dear penguins...
931
01:42:55,240 --> 01:42:57,720
...we stand on a great threshold!
932
01:42:59,200 --> 01:43:01,200
It's okay to be scared!
933
01:43:01,870 --> 01:43:04,360
Many of you won't be coming back.
934
01:43:04,750 --> 01:43:06,540
Thanks to Batman...
935
01:43:07,210 --> 01:43:09,040
...the time has come...
936
01:43:09,260 --> 01:43:11,660
...to punish all God's children!
937
01:43:13,180 --> 01:43:16,050
First-, second-, third- And fourth-born!
938
01:43:16,850 --> 01:43:18,380
Why be biased?
939
01:43:18,690 --> 01:43:20,340
Male and female!
940
01:43:21,100 --> 01:43:23,350
Hell, the sexes are equal...
941
01:43:24,270 --> 01:43:26,520
...with their erogenous zones...
942
01:43:26,690 --> 01:43:28,440
...blown sky-high!
943
01:43:31,370 --> 01:43:32,520
Forward...
944
01:43:33,870 --> 01:43:35,030
...march!
945
01:43:35,450 --> 01:43:37,610
The liberation of Gotham...
946
01:43:38,790 --> 01:43:40,280
...has begun!
947
01:44:25,430 --> 01:44:27,750
The penguins are moving above ground.
948
01:44:53,130 --> 01:44:54,620
Penguin army...
949
01:44:54,800 --> 01:44:58,120
...approaching launch destination
at Gotham Plaza.
950
01:44:59,470 --> 01:45:01,590
One minute until ignition.
951
01:45:02,140 --> 01:45:04,420
They wouldn't put me on a pedestal...
952
01:45:04,600 --> 01:45:07,000
...so I'm laying them on a slab!
953
01:45:08,270 --> 01:45:11,010
Penguins seem to be converging
on Gotham Plaza.
954
01:45:34,260 --> 01:45:36,380
Thirty seconds until ignition.
955
01:45:38,350 --> 01:45:40,880
Estimated casualties after launch:
956
01:45:42,020 --> 01:45:43,590
100,000 people.
957
01:45:47,020 --> 01:45:49,810
The penguins have reached
Gotham Square.
958
01:46:09,220 --> 01:46:11,210
Fifteen seconds to ignition.
959
01:46:13,800 --> 01:46:15,500
Ready when you are, sir.
960
01:46:18,310 --> 01:46:20,050
I've got the coordinates.
961
01:46:27,900 --> 01:46:29,600
Let's turn them around.
962
01:46:38,170 --> 01:46:39,660
Something is wrong.
963
01:46:41,420 --> 01:46:43,500
Something has jammed the signal.
964
01:46:53,770 --> 01:46:56,140
They seem to be turning around.
965
01:47:27,220 --> 01:47:30,090
There is also something coming this way.
966
01:47:31,060 --> 01:47:33,050
Very large. Very fast.
967
01:47:49,330 --> 01:47:50,660
Who's there?
968
01:47:57,930 --> 01:48:00,250
I'm homing in on the signal's origin.
969
01:49:16,310 --> 01:49:19,380
You're jealous
because I'm a genuine freak...
970
01:49:19,730 --> 01:49:21,970
...and you have to wear a mask!
971
01:49:22,230 --> 01:49:23,890
You might be right.
972
01:49:26,490 --> 01:49:30,430
But what it all comes down to is:
Who's holding the umbrella?
973
01:49:56,940 --> 01:49:58,300
My babies!
974
01:51:35,010 --> 01:51:39,340
I don't know what you want,
but I can get it with a minimum of fuss.
975
01:51:41,520 --> 01:51:42,680
Money.
976
01:51:43,020 --> 01:51:44,010
Jewels.
977
01:51:44,310 --> 01:51:46,300
A very big ball of string.
978
01:51:50,780 --> 01:51:52,440
Your blood, Max.
979
01:51:52,660 --> 01:51:54,230
I gave at the office.
980
01:51:54,660 --> 01:51:56,820
A half-pint. I'm talking gallons.
981
01:51:57,200 --> 01:51:58,650
Let's make a deal!
982
01:51:58,830 --> 01:52:00,950
Other than my blood, what can I do?
983
01:52:01,040 --> 01:52:03,320
Sorry, Max. A die for a die.
984
01:52:14,560 --> 01:52:16,920
You're not just saving a life...
985
01:52:17,060 --> 01:52:19,090
Shut up. You're going to jail.
986
01:52:19,810 --> 01:52:24,060
Don't be naive. The law doesn't
apply to people like him... or us.
987
01:52:24,650 --> 01:52:26,230
Wrong on both counts.
988
01:52:36,330 --> 01:52:37,490
Why do this?
989
01:52:41,500 --> 01:52:43,660
Let's just take him to the police.
990
01:52:45,260 --> 01:52:46,960
Then we can go home...
991
01:52:48,180 --> 01:52:49,340
...together.
992
01:52:55,400 --> 01:52:56,470
Selina...
993
01:52:59,690 --> 01:53:01,350
...don't you see?
994
01:53:02,490 --> 01:53:03,760
We're the same.
995
01:53:06,200 --> 01:53:07,610
We're the same.
996
01:53:09,330 --> 01:53:10,400
Split...
997
01:53:10,830 --> 01:53:12,320
...down the center.
998
01:53:33,900 --> 01:53:35,140
Please.
999
01:53:36,400 --> 01:53:37,560
Bruce...
1000
01:53:38,400 --> 01:53:41,560
...I would love to live with you
in your castle...
1001
01:53:44,080 --> 01:53:46,820
...forever, just like in a fairy tale.
1002
01:53:52,590 --> 01:53:56,360
I just couldn't live with myself.
Don't pretend this is a happy ending.
1003
01:53:59,090 --> 01:54:00,340
Selina Kyle.
1004
01:54:01,850 --> 01:54:03,260
You're fired.
1005
01:54:03,680 --> 01:54:05,260
And Bruce Wayne...
1006
01:54:05,770 --> 01:54:07,590
...why are you dressed up like Batman?
1007
01:54:07,690 --> 01:54:10,090
Because he is Batman, you moron!
1008
01:54:11,480 --> 01:54:12,560
Was.
1009
01:54:15,150 --> 01:54:16,100
Don't.
1010
01:54:16,280 --> 01:54:19,900
You killed me, the Penguin killed me,
Batman killed me.
1011
01:54:20,450 --> 01:54:23,490
Three lives down.
Got enough to finish me off?
1012
01:54:23,580 --> 01:54:25,110
One way to find out.
1013
01:54:28,710 --> 01:54:29,700
Four.
1014
01:54:29,960 --> 01:54:31,120
Five.
1015
01:54:34,590 --> 01:54:35,780
Still alive!
1016
01:54:45,480 --> 01:54:46,560
Six.
1017
01:54:46,730 --> 01:54:47,810
Seven.
1018
01:54:48,030 --> 01:54:50,270
All good girls go to heaven.
1019
01:54:56,740 --> 01:54:58,320
Two lives left.
1020
01:55:00,580 --> 01:55:03,060
I'll save one for next Christmas.
1021
01:55:05,500 --> 01:55:07,410
But in the meantime...
1022
01:55:09,260 --> 01:55:11,420
...how about a kiss, Santie Claus?
1023
01:56:42,620 --> 01:56:43,770
Shit!
1024
01:56:44,120 --> 01:56:45,940
I picked a cute one.
1025
01:56:49,460 --> 01:56:51,530
The heat's getting to me.
1026
01:56:52,460 --> 01:56:54,700
I'll murder you momentarily.
1027
01:56:57,010 --> 01:56:58,460
But first...
1028
01:56:59,220 --> 01:57:01,290
...I need a cool drink...
1029
01:57:02,010 --> 01:57:03,670
...of ice water.
1030
01:58:45,720 --> 01:58:47,040
Stop the car.
1031
02:00:08,060 --> 02:00:09,720
Come what may...
1032
02:00:10,150 --> 02:00:12,140
...Merry Christmas, Mr. Wayne!
1033
02:00:13,150 --> 02:00:14,890
Merry Christmas, Alfred!
1034
02:00:16,660 --> 02:00:18,310
Goodwill toward men.
1035
02:00:21,000 --> 02:00:22,240
And women.73439
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