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1
00:00:04,232 --> 00:00:06,843
Ugh, I'm tired of being out here.
2
00:00:06,887 --> 00:00:08,714
I wanna go home.
3
00:00:08,758 --> 00:00:11,282
Eww, Earth?
In space we can do whatever
4
00:00:11,326 --> 00:00:13,937
the hell we want with
basically no responsibilities.
5
00:00:13,981 --> 00:00:15,983
Kind of my point.
Maybe I'm ready to start
6
00:00:16,026 --> 00:00:18,855
having a real life instead of
being stuck here with your ass.
7
00:00:18,899 --> 00:00:21,989
Shh, my ass might hear you,
and it's very sensitive.
8
00:00:22,032 --> 00:00:24,774
- Of course, you know that.
- Not engaging.
9
00:00:24,817 --> 00:00:27,211
I'm just saying, maybe it's
time to hang this all up and...
10
00:00:27,255 --> 00:00:30,084
Ugh, is this about
your aching uterus again?
11
00:00:30,127 --> 00:00:31,999
Okay, who said anything about...
12
00:00:32,042 --> 00:00:34,088
Well, we haven't talked
about settling down but...
13
00:00:34,131 --> 00:00:36,046
- Nope.
- Key word "settling."
14
00:00:36,090 --> 00:00:37,177
I'm down with going to Earth.
15
00:00:37,178 --> 00:00:39,223
I could use some fresh faces to bang.
16
00:00:39,267 --> 00:00:43,967
And our bar stock is so low,
I may have to resort to beer.
17
00:00:44,011 --> 00:00:45,446
Has everyone gone crazy?
18
00:00:45,447 --> 00:00:48,232
We're on the final frontier
and you want to go back
19
00:00:48,276 --> 00:00:50,974
to doing day jobs
and gravity-laden sex?
20
00:00:51,018 --> 00:00:53,194
- Not my first preference.
- I vote with Archer.
21
00:00:53,237 --> 00:00:56,023
- Robots don't get a vote.
- I prefer "synthetic human."
22
00:00:57,198 --> 00:00:59,548
No one gets to vote.
I'm the captain.
23
00:00:59,591 --> 00:01:02,377
Co-captain.
And as the other co-captain,
24
00:01:02,420 --> 00:01:04,422
I am setting a course for Earth.
25
00:01:04,466 --> 00:01:08,774
No, Lana, I will not let you
hyperspace us to Boring-town.
26
00:01:11,081 --> 00:01:13,040
What the... ow!
27
00:01:13,083 --> 00:01:19,033
- Holy spacesnacks!
- It's a Dri'n battle cruiser.
28
00:01:19,481 --> 00:01:21,657
And somehow it hasn't noticed us.
29
00:01:21,700 --> 00:01:25,052
No, we're too close for its
long-range scanners to pick us up.
30
00:01:25,095 --> 00:01:26,923
Great, let's just loop around
this bad boy
31
00:01:26,967 --> 00:01:29,012
and hyperspace somewhere
that is not Earth.
32
00:01:29,056 --> 00:01:31,254
If we can destroy it, we will cripple
33
00:01:31,289 --> 00:01:34,060
- pirate activity in this sector.
- Who cares?
34
00:01:34,061 --> 00:01:37,324
And collecta 30 million
credit bounty for taking it out.
35
00:01:37,325 --> 00:01:41,046
As I was saying,
who cares about combatting
36
00:01:41,047 --> 00:01:44,722
- space piracy more than me?
- Exactly.
37
00:01:44,723 --> 00:01:48,292
The very reasonable reward
is just icing on the cake.
38
00:01:48,336 --> 00:01:51,294
- Guys, as captain of this ship...
- Co-captain.
39
00:01:51,295 --> 00:01:53,080
I am making an executive decision.
40
00:01:53,123 --> 00:01:56,953
- We're taking out that Dri'n bastard.
- Like I already executively decided.
41
00:01:56,997 --> 00:01:59,521
Hands in.
"Space cowboys" on three.
42
00:01:59,564 --> 00:02:02,113
One, two...
43
00:02:04,134 --> 00:02:06,793
What the hell are you doing?
44
00:02:39,101 --> 00:02:42,134
10x07 - Space Pirates
45
00:02:43,887 --> 00:02:47,223
sync & correction by f1nc0
~ Addic7ed.com ~
46
00:02:50,204 --> 00:02:52,548
Okay, here's the plan:
after we board the ship,
47
00:02:52,549 --> 00:02:55,948
knock out a couple of Dri'n guards,
and then... you'll love this...
48
00:02:55,992 --> 00:02:58,299
- put on their clothes...
- Not to be a buzzkill,
49
00:02:58,342 --> 00:03:01,171
but you think there'll really
be a plus-sized pirate onboard?
50
00:03:01,215 --> 00:03:04,392
- Ugh, this is a horrible plan.
- I'm not finished.
51
00:03:04,435 --> 00:03:06,524
Pam, you'll be our "prisoner."
52
00:03:06,568 --> 00:03:08,178
- Sweet!
- Lucky.
53
00:03:08,222 --> 00:03:10,398
- Still a horrible plan.
- Let me finish!
54
00:03:10,441 --> 00:03:14,315
We'll infiltrate the ship
disguised as Dri'n guards.
55
00:03:15,359 --> 00:03:17,231
That's it.
That's the whole plan.
56
00:03:17,274 --> 00:03:21,017
This is not a plan. This is the
plot of several famous films.
57
00:03:21,060 --> 00:03:22,660
Well, why do you think
they're famous, Lana?
58
00:03:22,671 --> 00:03:24,629
We'll need Ray
to get us some explosives.
59
00:03:24,673 --> 00:03:26,588
He's taking a sick day.
60
00:03:26,631 --> 00:03:28,231
- Of course he is.
- We get those?
61
00:03:28,242 --> 00:03:30,026
It's a miracle we don't
crash into the sun
62
00:03:30,069 --> 00:03:34,335
with all you Sick Day Cyrils
and Personal Day Pams.
63
00:03:34,378 --> 00:03:37,324
It is a pretty generous
package if you use it right.
64
00:03:37,367 --> 00:03:38,469
Space phrasing.
65
00:03:38,513 --> 00:03:40,035
Well, where am I supposed
to get explosives?
66
00:03:40,036 --> 00:03:43,257
"Thermite" be something
I can do to help.
67
00:03:43,300 --> 00:03:45,476
Referencing thermite explosives.
68
00:03:45,520 --> 00:03:47,609
I did not enjoy that.
69
00:03:47,652 --> 00:03:49,087
Does this thing havean off switch?
70
00:03:49,088 --> 00:03:52,831
- Aww, I have feelings.
- Volume control? Anything?
71
00:03:52,875 --> 00:03:54,877
Then we'll plant the thermite
all over the ship
72
00:03:54,920 --> 00:03:57,358
and "hola explosivo."
73
00:03:57,401 --> 00:03:59,708
- I'm confused.
- It's Spanish, Pam.
74
00:03:59,751 --> 00:04:01,884
No, how will we get
the "Seamus" out of here
75
00:04:01,927 --> 00:04:03,363
without us pinging their scanners?
76
00:04:03,364 --> 00:04:04,929
That's where Cyril and Carol come in.
77
00:04:04,930 --> 00:04:07,498
You two will disable
the radar system on board.
78
00:04:07,542 --> 00:04:09,674
- Whoo-hoo!
- Please don't.
79
00:04:09,718 --> 00:04:13,939
- I can disable the radar system!
- Can you disable yourself?
80
00:04:13,983 --> 00:04:17,073
- Beep, bop, boop. Ya burnt.
- Why not Krieger?
81
00:04:17,116 --> 00:04:18,901
I mean, he's qualified
even if he is a replicant.
82
00:04:18,944 --> 00:04:22,513
Thank you, Lana, but I like to
think I'm more of a Repli-can.
83
00:04:22,557 --> 00:04:24,298
No bots.
84
00:04:24,341 --> 00:04:27,170
- Mother, you stay and run comms.
- Stay here?
85
00:04:27,214 --> 00:04:30,260
With the liquor?
Well, if you insist.
86
00:04:30,304 --> 00:04:33,307
Space cowboys, let's ride!
87
00:04:33,550 --> 00:04:36,397
Would you stop trying
to make "space cowboys" stick?
88
00:04:36,440 --> 00:04:37,788
- It isn't.
- Fine, Lana.
89
00:04:37,789 --> 00:04:39,661
You stay here and be
the world-weary
90
00:04:39,704 --> 00:04:41,967
space saloon/brothel madam.
91
00:04:42,011 --> 00:04:44,535
- I wanna be a brothel madam!
- Ooh, I... I could be the banker
92
00:04:44,579 --> 00:04:46,014
and wear one of those green visors.
93
00:04:46,015 --> 00:04:48,496
Everybody stop making this stick!
94
00:04:48,649 --> 00:04:50,869
And if anything,
I would be co-sheriff.
95
00:04:50,912 --> 00:04:53,653
- That's not a thing.
- The whole thing's not a thing!
96
00:04:53,654 --> 00:04:55,133
Whoa, space cowboys.
97
00:04:55,134 --> 00:04:57,528
- What is it now, Krieger?
- I've got helpful gadgets!
98
00:04:57,571 --> 00:04:59,093
Like these voice changers!
99
00:04:59,094 --> 00:05:01,096
The Dri'n tongue is a beast,
you know.
100
00:05:01,140 --> 00:05:04,099
Fine, but honestly, Krieger,
this is all a little thirsty.
101
00:05:04,143 --> 00:05:07,330
- Like Lana's ovaries.
- Not engaging.
102
00:05:07,365 --> 00:05:11,498
Doesn't someone need to be
proposing before you're engaging?
103
00:05:11,542 --> 00:05:15,197
- Not en...
- She totally disarmed your phrase.
104
00:05:15,241 --> 00:05:18,454
So what's our plan when these
shitty voicechangers don't work?
105
00:05:18,489 --> 00:05:19,505
- I can hear you.
- Well, I picked up
106
00:05:19,506 --> 00:05:21,116
some phrases
banging a pirate or two.
107
00:05:21,160 --> 00:05:23,641
Here's how to say,
"Faster, harder."
108
00:05:23,684 --> 00:05:27,035
Because that'll come in handy.
109
00:05:27,079 --> 00:05:30,299
Now you try it.
110
00:05:30,343 --> 00:05:33,651
No, it's more like...
you know the sound you make
111
00:05:33,694 --> 00:05:36,349
after letting out a fart
you've been holding in all day?
112
00:05:36,393 --> 00:05:38,003
Oh, please.
You've never held in a fart
113
00:05:38,046 --> 00:05:41,249
- in your life.
- Tough but fair.
114
00:05:42,080 --> 00:05:42,883
Like now, Pam.
115
00:05:42,884 --> 00:05:44,777
Now would have been
a great time to hold it in.
116
00:05:48,477 --> 00:05:51,393
I have... I have no idea
117
00:05:51,437 --> 00:05:53,439
what she said,
but it just sounds funny.
118
00:05:54,938 --> 00:05:56,548
Jesus, Cyril, watch the landing.
119
00:05:56,592 --> 00:05:59,376
You gotta slide it in there gently.
120
00:06:01,031 --> 00:06:02,772
You are a terrible pilot.
121
00:06:02,816 --> 00:06:04,948
You put me on a job
that's not my specialty.
122
00:06:04,992 --> 00:06:07,472
- That's bad captaining.
- Co-captaining.
123
00:06:07,516 --> 00:06:09,648
- Oh, now you share the credit?
- Fine.
124
00:06:09,692 --> 00:06:12,782
I should have assigned Cyril
to his specialty of, uh...
125
00:06:12,826 --> 00:06:15,393
what is your specialty again?
Space accounting?
126
00:06:15,437 --> 00:06:17,854
You're putting "space" in front of it
to make it extra silly,
127
00:06:17,855 --> 00:06:20,921
but it's actually really an
important part of running a ship.
128
00:06:25,055 --> 00:06:26,655
That was quick.
129
00:06:38,457 --> 00:06:41,852
He's asking...
130
00:06:45,116 --> 00:06:47,248
He was just asking
131
00:06:47,292 --> 00:06:49,903
where we got these
human costumes, but...
132
00:06:49,947 --> 00:06:53,079
Oh, thank God you're here, Cyril.
You're so quick on the draw.
133
00:06:53,080 --> 00:06:55,039
My blaster got stuck in its holster.
134
00:06:55,082 --> 00:06:56,736
- I can help with that.
- Stop it!
135
00:06:56,780 --> 00:06:58,869
Unwanted advance in the workplace.
136
00:06:58,912 --> 00:07:01,697
Take it up with the Dri'n pirate HR.
137
00:07:01,741 --> 00:07:04,613
Get those uniforms on
and put in your voice changers.
138
00:07:04,657 --> 00:07:07,528
- More pirates will be coming.
- On my tits. Whaaat?
139
00:07:07,529 --> 00:07:10,750
- Do you even have tits?
- They're retractable.
140
00:07:11,969 --> 00:07:14,928
Now, where is that mainframe?
141
00:07:14,972 --> 00:07:17,061
This ship has zero Feng Shui.
142
00:07:18,105 --> 00:07:20,107
Whoa.
143
00:07:20,151 --> 00:07:23,544
There's gotta be a switch to
get a laser bridge or something.
144
00:07:23,545 --> 00:07:27,549
Why people build dangerous ravines
in spaceships is beyond me.
145
00:07:31,713 --> 00:07:33,686
You gotta warn me next time!
146
00:07:33,729 --> 00:07:36,210
We almost... and that hook
is not secure!
147
00:07:36,254 --> 00:07:38,560
How do you even know
the mainframe is on this side?
148
00:07:38,604 --> 00:07:41,781
Oh, I don't. I just find
terror kind of hot, you know?
149
00:07:41,825 --> 00:07:43,129
I do not know.
150
00:07:43,130 --> 00:07:44,871
Not to mention the woman
swinging the man across
151
00:07:44,915 --> 00:07:49,152
is totally...
emasculating! Shit balls!
152
00:07:50,529 --> 00:07:52,357
Guys, remember, place them
153
00:07:52,400 --> 00:07:55,012
on the structural beams
for maximum impact.
154
00:07:55,055 --> 00:07:58,015
I need more.
I'm missing a testicle.
155
00:07:58,208 --> 00:08:00,123
- What the hell are you doing?
- What's the big deal?
156
00:08:00,167 --> 00:08:02,951
It's thermite; throw it anywhere,
it's gonna blow up the ship.
157
00:08:02,952 --> 00:08:06,869
- I'm not letting you waste thermite.
- Give me the thermite.
158
00:08:06,912 --> 00:08:09,176
- God damn it, Archer.
- Uh-oh.
159
00:08:09,219 --> 00:08:12,222
It was an accident.
Yeah, it was flirty horseplay.
160
00:08:12,266 --> 00:08:14,833
- These aren't toys.
- Your boobs?
161
00:08:14,877 --> 00:08:17,271
- Because I beg to differ.
- It's stuck.
162
00:08:17,314 --> 00:08:19,186
Krieger, how do you peel off
these thermite charges?
163
00:08:19,229 --> 00:08:21,231
- Oh, no worries there.
- Oh, good.
164
00:08:21,275 --> 00:08:24,060
It's a super polymer.
Can't be removed or disarmed.
165
00:08:24,104 --> 00:08:27,281
I thought they would peel off
like air fresheners.
166
00:08:27,324 --> 00:08:30,153
They look like air fresheners.
Just take your shirt off, then.
167
00:08:30,197 --> 00:08:32,721
I'm not wearing a shirt
or bra under this.
168
00:08:32,884 --> 00:08:36,496
- Oh, I noticed.
- We all noticed. Is it for the pirates?
169
00:08:36,497 --> 00:08:39,021
Because they do not make
good husbands, Lana.
170
00:08:39,064 --> 00:08:41,458
I am not trying
to get a pirate husband!
171
00:08:41,502 --> 00:08:45,592
This ship has no AC and pirate
garb isn't exactly... oh, shit.
172
00:08:45,593 --> 00:08:46,910
_
173
00:08:46,957 --> 00:08:48,698
__
174
00:08:48,699 --> 00:08:49,792
_
175
00:08:49,958 --> 00:08:52,599
__
176
00:08:52,600 --> 00:08:55,907
Hey!
177
00:08:58,040 --> 00:09:00,216
Huh, it actually worked.
178
00:09:00,260 --> 00:09:02,349
Almost like Krieger knows
what he was doing.
179
00:09:02,392 --> 00:09:05,352
I'm sorry, Lana.
He'll never be a space cowboy.
180
00:09:05,395 --> 00:09:08,268
- Now, let's blow up this ship...
- Without blowing my tits off.
181
00:09:08,311 --> 00:09:10,270
Give me one more.
I need to finish my testicle.
182
00:09:10,313 --> 00:09:12,837
- Here.
- Seriously?!
183
00:09:12,881 --> 00:09:14,796
Guys, even for me
this is getting childish.
184
00:09:14,839 --> 00:09:18,147
Don't mention children.
Lana will smear her mascara.
185
00:09:18,191 --> 00:09:21,498
Eavesdropping and lobbing
insults is not running comms.
186
00:09:21,542 --> 00:09:24,088
I knew I should have done
the assigning, because
187
00:09:24,089 --> 00:09:26,894
everyone you picked is
spectacularly wrong for the job.
188
00:09:26,895 --> 00:09:28,374
See, this is
what I'm talking about.
189
00:09:28,375 --> 00:09:31,629
Why would they put the mainframe
right next door to the mess?
190
00:09:31,664 --> 00:09:33,162
The heat would be hell
on the data core.
191
00:09:33,206 --> 00:09:34,510
What, did you read that in your
192
00:09:34,511 --> 00:09:37,819
- spaceship architecture magazine?
- You mean"Starchitectural Digest"?
193
00:09:37,862 --> 00:09:40,343
Yes. Shall we get to work?
194
00:09:42,171 --> 00:09:46,306
Um... do you know how to
disable a radar system?
195
00:09:46,349 --> 00:09:48,872
- No.
- Is this another "fear is hot" thing,
196
00:09:48,873 --> 00:09:51,310
or do you really not know?
Because I sure don't.
197
00:09:51,311 --> 00:09:52,579
Ugh, bad captaining!
198
00:09:52,720 --> 00:09:56,107
Mission accomplished.
199
00:09:56,151 --> 00:09:58,109
How long should we set
the timers for?
200
00:09:58,153 --> 00:09:59,836
All right, let's see.
Uh, Cyril and Cheryl have
201
00:09:59,837 --> 00:10:01,695
to disarm the radar; we all
have to get to the hatch;
202
00:10:01,696 --> 00:10:03,311
and I have to strip this pirate suit off
203
00:10:03,312 --> 00:10:05,681
- so the bomb won't blowmy tits off.
- And Archer's baby-maker!
204
00:10:05,682 --> 00:10:08,903
Don't... don't say "baby," Pam,
because you know...
205
00:10:08,946 --> 00:10:10,557
Shit!
206
00:10:10,600 --> 00:10:12,646
You set them off!
How much time we got?
207
00:10:12,689 --> 00:10:14,289
- Shit, 11 minutes.
- Jesus!
208
00:10:14,299 --> 00:10:16,298
Couldn't you have kicked
a higher number?
209
00:10:16,333 --> 00:10:18,129
Or, you know, not at all?
210
00:10:18,173 --> 00:10:21,263
- We gotta run.
- Yeah, not much of a runner.
211
00:10:21,306 --> 00:10:23,134
Okay, guys, listen up.
We have 11 minutes
212
00:10:23,178 --> 00:10:24,919
to get our asses off this
ship before it explodes.
213
00:10:24,962 --> 00:10:27,487
Oh, God.
If you find terror hot,
214
00:10:27,530 --> 00:10:29,532
I must be gorgeous to you right now.
215
00:10:29,576 --> 00:10:32,448
- Yeah.
- No, stop! I shouldn't even be here!
216
00:10:32,449 --> 00:10:33,580
I should have been the one
217
00:10:33,623 --> 00:10:35,495
kicking back on the "Seamus"
running comms!
218
00:10:35,678 --> 00:10:38,463
For your information,
I've got my hands full.
219
00:10:38,507 --> 00:10:40,029
Full of what, gin and tonics?
220
00:10:40,030 --> 00:10:41,641
I don't know
what you're talking about.
221
00:10:41,684 --> 00:10:43,032
We can hear the ice clinking.
222
00:10:43,033 --> 00:10:46,688
No, that's space static.
Must be sun spots.
223
00:10:46,689 --> 00:10:48,865
We need you to connect us with Ray.
224
00:10:48,909 --> 00:10:52,781
- He's on a sick day!
- We're going to blow up in 11 minutes.
225
00:10:52,782 --> 00:10:54,043
Closer to ten.
226
00:10:54,044 --> 00:10:58,396
Hold, please. Ray?
227
00:10:58,440 --> 00:11:00,006
Ray, thank God.
We need your help.
228
00:11:00,147 --> 00:11:01,757
Yeah, kind of in the middle
of something.
229
00:11:01,801 --> 00:11:06,282
Ray our surgery pod is
not designed for recreational use.
230
00:11:06,283 --> 00:11:09,025
- This is a medical procedure.
- Scented candles?
231
00:11:09,069 --> 00:11:12,246
Is it a crime to want
to brighten up my colonoscopy?
232
00:11:12,289 --> 00:11:15,291
- I think not.
- You said it wasn't recreational!
233
00:11:15,292 --> 00:11:17,425
Colorectal cancer's serious business.
234
00:11:17,468 --> 00:11:19,775
You should be checked
every 10 years after 50.
235
00:11:19,819 --> 00:11:21,472
Ugh, how old are you?
236
00:11:21,516 --> 00:11:25,171
Or if you have atypical symptoms,
like a change in bowel habits.
237
00:11:25,172 --> 00:11:26,826
Speaking of which,
we're in the bowels
238
00:11:26,869 --> 00:11:28,915
- of an enemy battle cruiser!
- I'll be wearing
239
00:11:28,958 --> 00:11:32,222
my colorectal blue ribbon
that says, "I got tested."
240
00:11:32,416 --> 00:11:34,339
Tomorrow, after my sick day.
241
00:11:34,374 --> 00:11:35,596
Which you're interrupting.
242
00:11:35,631 --> 00:11:37,290
Ugh, we need you
to walk us through disabling
243
00:11:37,334 --> 00:11:40,206
a giant spaceship
radar system thingy.
244
00:11:40,250 --> 00:11:43,257
But my crisis vest is on Deck 2!
245
00:11:44,428 --> 00:11:46,212
- Ray!
- Fine.
246
00:11:46,256 --> 00:11:48,171
Let old Ray just interrupt
his prescribed
247
00:11:48,214 --> 00:11:50,173
lifesaving medical test to call up
248
00:11:50,216 --> 00:11:53,611
alien battle cruiser schematics
on his sick day.
249
00:11:53,654 --> 00:11:55,787
Don't suppose you have
a ship model number?
250
00:11:55,830 --> 00:11:59,094
We're inside the ship, so no.
And kind of in a hurry!
251
00:11:59,095 --> 00:12:00,573
Do you see a blinking green light?
252
00:12:03,292 --> 00:12:04,727
We're dead.
253
00:12:04,728 --> 00:12:06,991
Don't you just crave its sweet release?
254
00:12:07,035 --> 00:12:11,126
Okay, sending you
the disarming protocols...
255
00:12:11,170 --> 00:12:13,128
- ...now.
- Thanks, Ray, you're a lifesaver.
256
00:12:13,172 --> 00:12:16,784
You're... God damn it, Ray.
Is this a picture of your colon?
257
00:12:16,827 --> 00:12:18,263
- Aww.
- Sorry.
258
00:12:18,264 --> 00:12:20,788
This wine might be mixing
with my propofol.
259
00:12:20,831 --> 00:12:22,431
I do see why this is addictive.
260
00:12:22,442 --> 00:12:23,572
We only have eight minutes!
261
00:12:23,573 --> 00:12:27,363
Don't get your panties in a bunch.
262
00:12:27,664 --> 00:12:30,014
Also, do you see any polyps?
263
00:12:30,058 --> 00:12:33,235
Lana, how is it possible you
wanna give all this up for diapers?
264
00:12:33,279 --> 00:12:35,829
I don't know, maybe because
I don't need to play two-bit
265
00:12:35,830 --> 00:12:38,066
space cowboy just because
I'm scared of commitment.
266
00:12:38,110 --> 00:12:40,634
How dare you speak
precisely the truth at me.
267
00:12:40,677 --> 00:12:44,071
- Hey, guys! Wait up!
- You used to be fun.
268
00:12:44,072 --> 00:12:46,856
Now you want to do not-fun stuff
like settling down.
269
00:12:46,987 --> 00:12:50,513
- Well, I got news for you, sister.
- Don't say that, ever.
270
00:12:50,556 --> 00:12:53,777
- Settling is for potato chips.
- Oh, God, Archer.
271
00:12:53,820 --> 00:12:56,519
Will you stop treating me
like some baby-crazy clich�
272
00:12:56,562 --> 00:12:58,172
of maternal desire?
273
00:13:01,611 --> 00:13:05,136
- Aww, look at them!
- Oh, come on, Lana.
274
00:13:05,179 --> 00:13:09,575
- Space ocelots.
- Actually, they're called "grimalkians."
275
00:13:09,619 --> 00:13:14,276
Shut your mouth, Pam.
That is a goddamn space ocelot.
276
00:13:15,407 --> 00:13:17,366
Ah, son of a bitch.
277
00:13:17,409 --> 00:13:19,542
- You're a real natural.
- I've seen these before.
278
00:13:19,585 --> 00:13:21,718
A shithead ex of mine
had one as a pet.
279
00:13:21,761 --> 00:13:24,198
- I think they're endangered.
- No doubt the Dri'n
280
00:13:24,242 --> 00:13:25,939
stole them to sell their fur
to illegal traders.
281
00:13:25,983 --> 00:13:29,465
Yeah, this ex was an illegal
trader, so that all tracks.
282
00:13:29,508 --> 00:13:32,950
Shit, we've only got seven minutes
to get off this death star...
283
00:13:32,951 --> 00:13:34,687
lowercase "D," lowercase "S"...
284
00:13:34,731 --> 00:13:38,343
and back to the "Seamus" before
we explode in a million pieces.
285
00:13:38,507 --> 00:13:40,509
No, we can't blow up the ship
with them onboard.
286
00:13:40,552 --> 00:13:43,859
- They'll go extinct.
- I'll watch anything that asshole loved burn.
287
00:13:43,860 --> 00:13:46,602
Just look how adorable they are.
288
00:13:46,645 --> 00:13:48,473
Ow!
289
00:13:48,517 --> 00:13:51,476
Guys, look at this!
They love me!
290
00:13:51,520 --> 00:13:53,173
It's like I'm their king!
291
00:13:56,762 --> 00:13:58,764
Uh, Cyril, Cheryl?
Did you guys...
292
00:13:58,807 --> 00:14:01,680
Fail spectacularly at the one task
you were given?
293
00:14:01,723 --> 00:14:03,856
You said turn off the radar.
294
00:14:03,899 --> 00:14:05,640
You didn't say anything
about an alarm!
295
00:14:05,684 --> 00:14:07,860
It was clearly implied.
296
00:14:07,903 --> 00:14:09,469
Yes, it was.
Wasn't it?
297
00:14:09,470 --> 00:14:11,472
Yes, it was.
298
00:14:20,567 --> 00:14:22,525
All clear.
No intruders in here.
299
00:14:22,569 --> 00:14:25,658
- Oh, shit, is that English?
- He's the intruder you're looking for!
300
00:14:25,659 --> 00:14:27,487
Aww, balls.
Mine's broken too.
301
00:14:29,358 --> 00:14:33,319
- Hey, screw you for that.
- Girl's gotta self-preserve, dude.
302
00:14:34,450 --> 00:14:37,323
Okay, so now we need
to rescue Cyril and Cheryl...
303
00:14:37,366 --> 00:14:40,108
Yeah, that's great, but we
have another rescue first.
304
00:14:40,151 --> 00:14:41,674
- What?
- The space ocelots, Pam.
305
00:14:41,675 --> 00:14:45,330
We've got six minutes,
so let's start with the...
306
00:14:45,331 --> 00:14:47,681
widdle baby furballs.
307
00:14:47,724 --> 00:14:50,684
- Oh, mother...
- Is not what you should be,
308
00:14:50,727 --> 00:14:53,295
because these things
do not like you.
309
00:14:53,339 --> 00:14:55,776
It is a hilarious twist of fate.
310
00:14:57,212 --> 00:14:59,693
Holy hell, those little
twerps are quick.
311
00:14:59,856 --> 00:15:03,599
- Oh, well. Let's get out of here.
- What the...
312
00:15:03,643 --> 00:15:08,299
- Aww, he likes you.
- Um, no, Lana. He loves me.
313
00:15:08,343 --> 00:15:11,510
This guy is so cool.
Here, Lana, get a picture.
314
00:15:11,520 --> 00:15:13,870
Just kick the little shit off
and let's roll!
315
00:15:13,914 --> 00:15:15,349
We're buds!
316
00:15:15,350 --> 00:15:18,135
I'm a badass space cowboy,
and he's my deputy!
317
00:15:18,179 --> 00:15:20,094
Don't you wanna
jump on my shoulder
318
00:15:20,137 --> 00:15:23,924
and be my widdle deputy?
I'm a co-space cowboy.
319
00:15:23,967 --> 00:15:27,362
Wow, jealousy is an
ugly color on you, Lana.
320
00:15:28,494 --> 00:15:30,670
Something's wrong with this blaster!
321
00:15:31,714 --> 00:15:33,716
Have you tried opening your eyes?
322
00:15:33,760 --> 00:15:34,977
Yes!
323
00:15:34,978 --> 00:15:38,112
They actually are open!
For real!
324
00:15:40,767 --> 00:15:43,465
Guess that's not a factor anyway.
325
00:15:44,945 --> 00:15:47,382
Where's the fire, brother?
326
00:15:47,576 --> 00:15:50,535
Oh, shit, was that English?
327
00:15:50,579 --> 00:15:52,624
Why'd you even open
your big mouth, Archer?
328
00:15:52,668 --> 00:15:54,452
He was running right by us.
329
00:15:54,495 --> 00:15:58,702
I think the better question is,
why do we even have a ship robot
330
00:15:58,703 --> 00:16:02,068
if he can't even make his
stupid robot gadgets work?
331
00:16:02,112 --> 00:16:04,767
- We're cut off!
- My circulation is cut off.
332
00:16:04,810 --> 00:16:06,551
The grip on this thing is unreal.
333
00:16:06,595 --> 00:16:09,554
Look at this!
He's eating this shit up.
334
00:16:11,034 --> 00:16:15,865
Come on, little buddy.
Let's go in the fun tunnel.
335
00:16:15,908 --> 00:16:17,518
- Pam?
- Nah.
336
00:16:17,562 --> 00:16:19,695
I don't do tight spaces
I'm not familiar with.
337
00:16:19,738 --> 00:16:22,610
Just go. I'll hold them off
and meet you at the dock.
338
00:16:22,611 --> 00:16:25,526
Come and get it, space dicks!
339
00:16:25,570 --> 00:16:28,921
- Well, at least it's downhill.
- A little too downhill.
340
00:16:28,965 --> 00:16:31,924
- Are you sure this is an air vent?
- Of course it's an air vent.
341
00:16:38,278 --> 00:16:40,933
Ugh, you've gotta be shitting me.
342
00:16:42,979 --> 00:16:46,025
Oops, I guess it wasn't an air vent.
343
00:16:48,854 --> 00:16:53,249
- Ah, my blaster jammed!
- Blasters don't jam, you lying fleshbag!
344
00:16:53,293 --> 00:16:54,990
You're pathetic!
Cover me!
345
00:16:59,081 --> 00:17:00,822
- I thought you had a plan!
- I do!
346
00:17:00,866 --> 00:17:03,869
- I'm making a necklace.
- I will give you one of my teeth.
347
00:17:03,912 --> 00:17:06,045
- Just get me off this ship.
- Nope, it's not the same.
348
00:17:06,088 --> 00:17:07,873
It has to be from a kill.
349
00:17:07,916 --> 00:17:10,092
Unless that's something
you might be interested in.
350
00:17:10,136 --> 00:17:14,139
Ew, no. Hey, any chance
of getting a rescue here?
351
00:17:14,140 --> 00:17:16,229
- Yeah, uh, about that.
- Oh, Lana.
352
00:17:16,272 --> 00:17:17,883
- Thank God.
- Archer had us escape
353
00:17:17,926 --> 00:17:20,059
- in a stupid air vent that...
- Air vent, copy that.
354
00:17:23,062 --> 00:17:26,195
- Cyril, let her finish.
- Oh, God, this is a dead end.
355
00:17:26,239 --> 00:17:27,980
We have two minutes!
What do we do?
356
00:17:28,023 --> 00:17:29,589
Ugh, you're not gonna
wet your uniform
357
00:17:29,590 --> 00:17:31,853
like last time?
Not the time or place.
358
00:17:32,037 --> 00:17:33,777
Actually, this is
a pretty good time and place.
359
00:17:33,821 --> 00:17:36,606
New plan: we form
a human-ocelot ladder...
360
00:17:36,650 --> 00:17:39,392
- Ugh, I'd rather just die.
- To get back to the air vent.
361
00:17:39,435 --> 00:17:42,829
- Stop calling it an air vent.
- Fine!
362
00:17:42,830 --> 00:17:44,222
Pam!
363
00:17:44,223 --> 00:17:47,095
- Thank God.
- You're running the wrong way.
364
00:17:47,139 --> 00:17:48,269
Cannonball!
365
00:17:49,968 --> 00:17:51,446
It's in my mouth.
366
00:17:58,324 --> 00:18:00,239
This is not good.
367
00:18:02,893 --> 00:18:06,287
- Even my little ocelot bud bailed.
- I'm calling Krieger for backup.
368
00:18:06,288 --> 00:18:09,639
No, Lana.
Space cowboys do or die.
369
00:18:09,683 --> 00:18:11,075
He's our only option.
370
00:18:11,076 --> 00:18:14,241
Malory, Krieger, come in!
371
00:18:14,392 --> 00:18:16,037
Come in!
372
00:18:16,072 --> 00:18:17,406
Yes! It's Krieger.
What do you need? I can do it!
373
00:18:17,449 --> 00:18:20,277
Get down here, stat.
We need backup immediately.
374
00:18:20,278 --> 00:18:21,496
- Trash compactor.
- I'm on it!
375
00:18:21,497 --> 00:18:25,109
Yes!
Needed by real humans.
376
00:18:28,939 --> 00:18:30,854
My God, why did we even bring him?
377
00:18:30,897 --> 00:18:34,118
This is it, people!
This is the end!
378
00:18:34,162 --> 00:18:37,252
Brace yourselves for obliteration!
379
00:18:40,080 --> 00:18:42,126
I really like her this way.
380
00:18:42,170 --> 00:18:45,173
- I'm kind of into it myself.
- Wait! Look!
381
00:18:52,919 --> 00:18:56,271
Jesus!
They're demons in disguise.
382
00:18:56,314 --> 00:18:58,403
I've been fooled.
383
00:19:01,406 --> 00:19:02,754
- Ugh.
- Oh, my God.
384
00:19:02,755 --> 00:19:05,845
Why does it have to be so gross?
385
00:19:07,282 --> 00:19:10,285
Stand back, folks.
I've "bot" this.
386
00:19:10,328 --> 00:19:12,809
And once again, you and
387
00:19:12,852 --> 00:19:16,378
your iron heart are
completely useless.
388
00:19:17,944 --> 00:19:19,598
There's my pal!
389
00:19:19,772 --> 00:19:22,775
Back to normal.
You can't quit me, can you?
390
00:19:22,818 --> 00:19:24,559
How much time?
391
00:19:24,603 --> 00:19:27,388
- 30 seconds.
- This is gonna be tight.
392
00:19:27,432 --> 00:19:28,649
It wouldn't be tight
if you hadn't screwed up
393
00:19:28,650 --> 00:19:31,251
- the assignments!
- Whatever, Lana.
394
00:19:31,261 --> 00:19:32,959
Maybe I screwed up the
assignments on purpose
395
00:19:33,002 --> 00:19:35,614
so you'd feel needed
and want to stay.
396
00:19:35,657 --> 00:19:37,311
Oh, please.
Maybe you're just saying that
397
00:19:37,355 --> 00:19:39,313
as a cool way to cover
screwing up the assignments.
398
00:19:39,357 --> 00:19:42,447
Oh, go have an Earth baby,
why don't you?
399
00:19:42,490 --> 00:19:44,405
Oh, we can't just leave these
space ocelots here.
400
00:19:44,589 --> 00:19:46,189
Grimalkians.
And, yes, we can.
401
00:19:46,199 --> 00:19:47,940
Pam, I'm not gonna do this with you.
402
00:19:47,983 --> 00:19:51,465
- I'm already too upset.
- Oh, God, their eyes.
403
00:19:51,509 --> 00:19:53,249
- Even though they hate you?
- Yep, even though.
404
00:19:53,293 --> 00:19:55,643
- 15 seconds!
- I think these furry banshees
405
00:19:55,687 --> 00:19:57,252
are just gonna have
to stay on board.
406
00:20:12,442 --> 00:20:17,272
- I meant on board the other ship.
- Oh, God damn it to shit!
407
00:20:17,273 --> 00:20:18,971
Can't these bastards stay
in the cargo hold?
408
00:20:19,014 --> 00:20:22,627
Mommy's just joking.
409
00:20:22,670 --> 00:20:25,238
I think we all know
who the fun parent is.
410
00:20:28,092 --> 00:20:32,171
sync & correction by f1nc0
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