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1
00:00:04,480 --> 00:00:07,120
Right, Dad, come on,
that's you. You all right?
2
00:00:07,120 --> 00:00:09,280
Get off! I'm fine.
3
00:00:11,600 --> 00:00:13,200
This isn't your house, is it?
4
00:00:13,200 --> 00:00:15,240
Aye. Have you done it up?
5
00:00:15,240 --> 00:00:17,880
Aye, well, we had the
roughcast cleaned,
6
00:00:17,880 --> 00:00:20,680
new windows there and we've got
the mono-blocked driveway too.
7
00:00:20,680 --> 00:00:22,000
Do you like it?
8
00:00:23,920 --> 00:00:25,680
Naw.
9
00:00:25,680 --> 00:00:28,640
Aye, come on, let's go. Here.
10
00:00:28,640 --> 00:00:30,200
OK, leave me alone.
11
00:00:30,200 --> 00:00:35,640
This programme contains adult humour
and some strong language
12
00:00:35,640 --> 00:00:38,920
Here he is, birthday boy.
13
00:00:38,920 --> 00:00:41,560
Hi, Willie, how are you?
14
00:00:41,560 --> 00:00:43,920
What's wi' all this shite?
15
00:00:43,920 --> 00:00:47,800
Ah, it's for your birthday, Willie,
we are celebrating.
16
00:00:47,800 --> 00:00:49,440
I'm 79, hen.
17
00:00:49,440 --> 00:00:52,760
The only thing I'm celebrating is
getting a full piss out in one go.
18
00:00:54,440 --> 00:00:55,480
Right.
19
00:01:12,440 --> 00:01:14,560
How old did Colin say his dad was?
20
00:01:14,560 --> 00:01:16,640
Was it not 70-something?
21
00:01:16,640 --> 00:01:17,960
Jeezo.
22
00:01:17,960 --> 00:01:19,360
I've no' seen him for years.
23
00:01:19,360 --> 00:01:21,760
Well, he's been in that
nursing home hasn't he? Aye.
24
00:01:21,760 --> 00:01:24,040
Cathy says he's not
that happy there. No?
25
00:01:24,040 --> 00:01:26,720
No. He's been causing
a few problems for the staff.
26
00:01:26,720 --> 00:01:28,480
They thought he could do with the
odd day out,
27
00:01:28,480 --> 00:01:29,520
see his family a bit more.
28
00:01:29,520 --> 00:01:32,040
And they thought that
would cheer him up?!
29
00:01:32,040 --> 00:01:33,320
Hi there, Colin.
30
00:01:33,320 --> 00:01:35,560
Hello. Ho, ho, ho.
31
00:01:35,560 --> 00:01:36,760
In you come, come on.
32
00:01:39,640 --> 00:01:41,000
There you go, Willie.
33
00:01:43,080 --> 00:01:45,600
Dad, that's...
That's Eric and Beth here.
34
00:01:45,600 --> 00:01:47,440
Hello, Willie. Hiya, Willie.
35
00:01:47,440 --> 00:01:49,120
Oh, Beth and Eric.
36
00:01:50,320 --> 00:01:51,520
Oh!
37
00:01:53,920 --> 00:01:55,840
It's Beth and Eric, Willie.
38
00:01:59,200 --> 00:02:00,240
Who's this?
39
00:02:00,240 --> 00:02:03,080
It's Beth and Eric.
They stay next door.
40
00:02:03,080 --> 00:02:05,720
Remember Eric changed
that tyre for you that time?
41
00:02:05,720 --> 00:02:06,840
Oh, aye.
42
00:02:06,840 --> 00:02:07,880
How you doing?
43
00:02:07,880 --> 00:02:09,760
I can see where he put the old one.
44
00:02:11,200 --> 00:02:12,680
What have you got there, missus?
45
00:02:12,680 --> 00:02:15,480
Fudge. I made you some fudge
for your birthday, Willie.
46
00:02:15,480 --> 00:02:17,440
Oh, wow-ee.
47
00:02:17,440 --> 00:02:21,240
Look at the beautiful clingfilm
all tucked in underneath
48
00:02:21,240 --> 00:02:22,920
for your birthday, Willie.
49
00:02:22,920 --> 00:02:25,640
Are you wanting to try
a bit now with your cup of tea?
50
00:02:25,640 --> 00:02:27,800
Fudge? With tea?
51
00:02:27,800 --> 00:02:29,240
OK, OK.
52
00:02:29,240 --> 00:02:31,680
Fudge. With a cup of tea!
53
00:02:31,680 --> 00:02:33,600
All right, Dad, all right.
54
00:02:33,600 --> 00:02:35,040
Maybe have it later.
55
00:02:35,040 --> 00:02:37,680
A biscuit! A biscuit with tea.
56
00:02:37,680 --> 00:02:40,800
Right, OK, Willie, I'll get you
a biscuit - chocolate biscuit.
57
00:02:40,800 --> 00:02:43,280
Naw, naw, naw,
no' a chocolate biscuit.
58
00:02:43,280 --> 00:02:44,560
A plain biscuit?
59
00:02:44,560 --> 00:02:46,080
We've got plain biscuits, I could...
60
00:02:46,080 --> 00:02:47,560
No, no, no, you're all right, Beth.
61
00:02:47,560 --> 00:02:48,840
S'all right Beth.
62
00:02:48,840 --> 00:02:50,160
We've got digestives.
63
00:02:51,160 --> 00:02:55,040
Right, would anyone else like
anything? Eric, a Penguin?
64
00:02:55,040 --> 00:02:56,800
No. You sure?
65
00:02:56,800 --> 00:02:58,240
I thought you liked Penguins.
66
00:02:58,240 --> 00:03:00,680
No, I'm fine.
What about a drink or something?
67
00:03:00,680 --> 00:03:02,240
Well... Would you like a beer?
68
00:03:02,240 --> 00:03:06,400
Aye, I'll take a beer. I'll have
a beer as well. Two beers, Cath.
69
00:03:06,400 --> 00:03:07,920
Two beers. Beth?
70
00:03:07,920 --> 00:03:09,560
I'll come through
and give you a hand.
71
00:03:09,560 --> 00:03:11,080
No, no, no, you sit down.
72
00:03:11,080 --> 00:03:13,320
You're the guest today,
I have got this.
73
00:03:13,320 --> 00:03:15,720
Oh, well, just a
cup of coffee for me, then.
74
00:03:15,720 --> 00:03:20,600
OK, then. So that is three coffees,
two Penguins and a beer for Willie.
75
00:03:29,480 --> 00:03:31,800
No' bad weather we've
been having lately, eh?
76
00:03:31,800 --> 00:03:33,920
Aye.
77
00:03:33,920 --> 00:03:36,080
Been decent up your way
has it, Willie?
78
00:03:36,080 --> 00:03:37,240
Naw.
79
00:03:40,400 --> 00:03:41,520
You all right, Cath?
80
00:03:41,520 --> 00:03:42,960
Oh, hi, Beth.
81
00:03:42,960 --> 00:03:44,160
How are you managing?
82
00:03:44,160 --> 00:03:46,920
Good, yeah, no problem, just...
83
00:03:53,760 --> 00:03:55,120
Willie all right, is he?
84
00:03:55,120 --> 00:03:58,480
He is absolutely fine.
He's no problem at all.
85
00:03:58,480 --> 00:03:59,720
You know, I said to Colin,
86
00:03:59,720 --> 00:04:02,120
I think those nurses
up there exaggerate things.
87
00:04:02,120 --> 00:04:03,680
DOORBELL RINGS
88
00:04:03,680 --> 00:04:05,600
You know, lazy cows.
89
00:04:05,600 --> 00:04:08,280
If they haven't got the patience
to deal with old people,
90
00:04:08,280 --> 00:04:10,560
they shouldn't be in the job
in the first place.
91
00:04:10,560 --> 00:04:11,880
Is he staying the night?
92
00:04:11,880 --> 00:04:13,880
No chance.
93
00:04:13,880 --> 00:04:14,920
Christine!
94
00:04:14,920 --> 00:04:16,240
Is he here?
95
00:04:16,240 --> 00:04:17,680
Aye, he's here.
96
00:04:17,680 --> 00:04:19,200
Lovely.
97
00:04:19,200 --> 00:04:22,560
Sophie, y'all right? Come on,
let's get this party started.
98
00:04:23,680 --> 00:04:25,120
Can I use your loo, please?
99
00:04:26,120 --> 00:04:28,080
Aye, sure.
100
00:04:28,080 --> 00:04:30,120
Just in there.
101
00:04:30,120 --> 00:04:31,640
Oh, hi, Christine.
102
00:04:31,640 --> 00:04:33,360
LOUDLY AND SLOWLY: Hullo, Willie.
103
00:04:33,360 --> 00:04:35,760
Good to see you again.
104
00:04:35,760 --> 00:04:36,840
Who's this?
105
00:04:36,840 --> 00:04:38,680
It's Christine from next door, Dad.
106
00:04:38,680 --> 00:04:42,040
Uh-huh. I met you
a number of years ago, Willie.
107
00:04:42,040 --> 00:04:45,680
You might not remember,
you were eating a fish supper.
108
00:04:45,680 --> 00:04:50,080
I was in getting a battered sausage
for my daughter, So...
109
00:04:50,080 --> 00:04:52,000
Where is she?
Oh, she's in the loo.
110
00:04:52,000 --> 00:04:55,240
Oh. For my daughter, Sophie,
111
00:04:55,240 --> 00:04:59,800
who's here with me today also
but who is in the loo at the minute.
112
00:04:59,800 --> 00:05:01,440
TOILET FLUSHES
113
00:05:01,440 --> 00:05:03,960
Oh, that's her finished.
114
00:05:03,960 --> 00:05:06,480
I must say, it is indeed an honour
115
00:05:06,480 --> 00:05:11,480
to have been invited along here
today to your birthday, Willie.
116
00:05:11,480 --> 00:05:13,720
They must think an awful lot of you,
117
00:05:13,720 --> 00:05:17,200
because Cathy's hardly ever
out her bed by this time,
118
00:05:17,200 --> 00:05:19,840
never mind inviting folk in
for a drink.
119
00:05:21,600 --> 00:05:24,000
Oh, oh, here she is now.
120
00:05:24,000 --> 00:05:26,920
This is my daughter, Sophie, Willie.
121
00:05:26,920 --> 00:05:28,920
Hiya. Happy birthday.
122
00:05:28,920 --> 00:05:30,240
Where's your sausage?
123
00:05:31,360 --> 00:05:32,400
Sorry?
124
00:05:32,400 --> 00:05:34,760
Did she not say she was
away getting sausage?
125
00:05:34,760 --> 00:05:38,240
No, no, no, no. She was in the loo.
126
00:05:38,240 --> 00:05:43,600
I was in getting her a sausage when
I met you with your fish supper.
127
00:05:43,600 --> 00:05:46,240
Sophie, what flush did you use?
128
00:05:46,240 --> 00:05:47,280
What?
129
00:05:47,280 --> 00:05:50,000
We've got two flushes, Eric,
a big one and a wee one.
130
00:05:50,000 --> 00:05:51,480
The small one is just for liquids.
131
00:05:51,480 --> 00:05:53,320
For urine, Eric.
132
00:05:53,320 --> 00:05:54,760
And the big one, obviously, for...
133
00:05:54,760 --> 00:05:56,440
For solids.
134
00:05:56,440 --> 00:05:58,160
Let's put my music back on.
135
00:05:59,680 --> 00:06:02,000
I brought you a wee present, Willie.
136
00:06:02,000 --> 00:06:04,320
Oh, look at that, Dad.
137
00:06:04,320 --> 00:06:06,520
Does he like whisky? Oh, aye.
138
00:06:06,520 --> 00:06:08,320
That's very generous
of you, Christine.
139
00:06:08,320 --> 00:06:10,720
Oh, look at that, Cath,
look what Christine brought him.
140
00:06:10,720 --> 00:06:14,200
It's malt whisky, Cathy,
from Pitlochry.
141
00:06:14,200 --> 00:06:15,880
Oh, Willie. Wow!
142
00:06:17,960 --> 00:06:19,120
Where did you say you got it?
143
00:06:19,120 --> 00:06:20,240
Pitlochry.
144
00:06:20,240 --> 00:06:21,680
Pitlochry, Willie.
145
00:06:21,680 --> 00:06:23,400
What were you doing in Pitlochry?
146
00:06:23,400 --> 00:06:26,840
Oh, I was away on
a bus tour with Pat over the back.
147
00:06:26,840 --> 00:06:29,120
It was small towns of Perthshire
148
00:06:29,120 --> 00:06:31,880
and a waterfall
I wisnae interested in.
149
00:06:31,880 --> 00:06:33,760
Malt whisky, my ass.
150
00:06:33,760 --> 00:06:34,880
Whit?!
151
00:06:34,880 --> 00:06:36,280
That's not malt whisky.
152
00:06:36,280 --> 00:06:38,960
That's that cheap shite
they sell to tourists.
153
00:06:40,960 --> 00:06:43,400
Dad's quite fussy about his whisky.
154
00:06:43,400 --> 00:06:46,640
Well, still, it was a lovely
thought, Christine. Wasn't it, Eric?
155
00:06:46,640 --> 00:06:47,800
Aye, Oh, aye.
156
00:06:47,800 --> 00:06:49,600
Sophie, would you like
a drink of something?
157
00:06:49,600 --> 00:06:50,840
No, I'm fine, thanks.
158
00:06:50,840 --> 00:06:52,760
Here, Eric, do you fancy a dram?
159
00:06:52,760 --> 00:06:55,760
Dad, you don't mind
if I open this, do you?
160
00:06:55,760 --> 00:06:56,920
Eric?
161
00:06:56,920 --> 00:06:58,000
Well...
162
00:06:58,000 --> 00:07:00,600
No' good enough for you, either?
163
00:07:00,600 --> 00:07:02,040
No, I'll... I'll take one.
164
00:07:02,040 --> 00:07:03,440
A wee splash o' water?
165
00:07:03,440 --> 00:07:05,760
Yeah, smashing. Beth?
166
00:07:05,760 --> 00:07:08,960
Sure, why not, ice with mine
if you've got it, Colin.
167
00:07:08,960 --> 00:07:10,560
Sophie?
168
00:07:10,560 --> 00:07:14,200
She's pregnant, Colin,
she'll just have a Breezer.
169
00:07:14,200 --> 00:07:15,720
Christine, would you like anything?
170
00:07:15,720 --> 00:07:17,880
Aye, ma fucking money back.
171
00:07:21,280 --> 00:07:24,240
I should never
have bothered my arse.
172
00:07:24,240 --> 00:07:26,040
Pat said to me in the shop,
173
00:07:26,040 --> 00:07:28,880
"Why don't you just get him
the squeezy haggis
174
00:07:28,880 --> 00:07:32,600
"wi' the fridge magnet wi' the piper
on the front," and I said,
175
00:07:32,600 --> 00:07:36,440
"No. No way am I turning up to
Cathy Whyte's hoose
176
00:07:36,440 --> 00:07:38,840
"wi' a load o' cheap shite."
177
00:07:38,840 --> 00:07:39,960
I know, Christine.
178
00:07:41,120 --> 00:07:43,440
Miserable old bastard.
179
00:07:43,440 --> 00:07:46,960
I mean, you spend £5.99
on a bottle of malt whisky
180
00:07:46,960 --> 00:07:49,640
and that's the thanks you get?
181
00:07:49,640 --> 00:07:52,560
I don't think he's having
a great time up at that place
182
00:07:52,560 --> 00:07:53,960
he's staying at.
183
00:07:53,960 --> 00:07:58,280
Aye, what's the matter? The arse
wiping no' up to scratch, naw?
184
00:07:58,280 --> 00:08:02,640
Ho, ho, ho, here we go. Right.
185
00:08:04,840 --> 00:08:10,320
Here, does anyone know what
whisky means in Gaelic?
186
00:08:10,320 --> 00:08:12,080
The word "whisky"?
187
00:08:12,080 --> 00:08:13,320
I know, I know, I know.
188
00:08:13,320 --> 00:08:14,400
I don't know.
189
00:08:14,400 --> 00:08:15,520
Sophie?
190
00:08:15,520 --> 00:08:16,760
I don't know.
191
00:08:16,760 --> 00:08:18,760
Guess. I don't know.
Just guess!
192
00:08:20,040 --> 00:08:21,640
Alcohol?
193
00:08:21,640 --> 00:08:22,800
Alcohol.
194
00:08:22,800 --> 00:08:24,760
She thinks it means alcohol, Colin.
195
00:08:24,760 --> 00:08:27,320
No. It means...Eric?
196
00:08:27,320 --> 00:08:28,560
Water of life.
197
00:08:28,560 --> 00:08:32,120
Water...of...life, Sophie.
198
00:08:32,120 --> 00:08:33,320
Water of life!
199
00:08:34,520 --> 00:08:38,480
Water of life? That's three words,
whisky's only one.
200
00:08:38,480 --> 00:08:40,520
How the fuck were we
meant to know that?
201
00:08:40,520 --> 00:08:44,280
OK, so, everyone ready?
I've got a wee toast.
202
00:08:44,280 --> 00:08:47,160
Here's to my Dad -
we don't see him often enough
203
00:08:47,160 --> 00:08:50,600
and it's, well, it's great to have
you here, it really is,
204
00:08:50,600 --> 00:08:53,520
so here's wishing you
a happy birthday.
205
00:08:53,520 --> 00:08:55,520
ALL: Happy birthday, Willie.
206
00:08:58,600 --> 00:08:59,840
Pish water!
207
00:08:59,840 --> 00:09:01,880
Aye, well, cheers, everybody.
208
00:09:01,880 --> 00:09:02,920
Cheers.
209
00:09:02,920 --> 00:09:05,000
Slainte. What's slainte?
210
00:09:05,000 --> 00:09:06,720
That's Gaelic as well.
211
00:09:06,720 --> 00:09:08,520
It means, "Let's get pissed!"
212
00:09:08,520 --> 00:09:12,280
Christ, what is it wi' them
turning everything into one word?
213
00:09:12,280 --> 00:09:14,120
Are they short of paper up there?
214
00:09:14,120 --> 00:09:15,720
Anyone for another wee drop?
215
00:09:15,720 --> 00:09:16,840
Oh, yeah!
216
00:09:16,840 --> 00:09:19,280
Eric? Well, I suppose.
217
00:09:19,280 --> 00:09:21,360
Isn't this fun?
218
00:09:21,360 --> 00:09:22,880
Isn't this fun, Willie?
219
00:09:28,960 --> 00:09:31,680
Sophie, do you want
a wee drink or something?
220
00:09:31,680 --> 00:09:32,960
No, I'm all right.
221
00:09:32,960 --> 00:09:34,440
Are you sure?
222
00:09:34,440 --> 00:09:35,800
A wee can of Irn Bru?
223
00:09:35,800 --> 00:09:36,960
No thanks.
224
00:09:36,960 --> 00:09:40,200
Don't! She might have
a wee ginger baby.
225
00:09:40,200 --> 00:09:41,360
Ha-ha ha-ha!
226
00:09:41,360 --> 00:09:42,400
Heh heh heh.
227
00:09:42,400 --> 00:09:44,680
PHONE RINGS
228
00:09:42,400 --> 00:09:44,680
Oh, it's Ian.
229
00:09:44,680 --> 00:09:46,720
Hello, love.
230
00:09:46,720 --> 00:09:48,400
Oh, right.
231
00:09:48,400 --> 00:09:52,400
Cathy. Ian and Jaz are at ours,
they've just dropped by.
232
00:09:52,400 --> 00:09:55,200
We should probably...
No, no, tell them to come in.
233
00:09:55,200 --> 00:09:57,560
Ian, come to ours,
we're having a party!
234
00:09:57,560 --> 00:09:59,200
Y'all right, Dad?
235
00:09:59,200 --> 00:10:00,840
Is that time to go? No, no.
236
00:10:00,840 --> 00:10:02,440
It's not time to go yet, Willie.
237
00:10:02,440 --> 00:10:04,280
No, you can stay
as long as you like.
238
00:10:04,280 --> 00:10:05,680
Well, till about seven.
239
00:10:09,160 --> 00:10:11,120
Oh, hiya.
240
00:10:11,120 --> 00:10:14,640
Look at you two, like two
wee gay Jehovah's Witnesses.
241
00:10:17,960 --> 00:10:19,120
In you come.
242
00:10:22,960 --> 00:10:24,360
Look who I found!
243
00:10:25,360 --> 00:10:28,040
Ho, ho, you boys
ready to join the party?
244
00:10:28,040 --> 00:10:30,280
Hi, son. Hi, boys.
Hiya. All right, Soph?
245
00:10:30,280 --> 00:10:31,400
Hiya.
246
00:10:31,400 --> 00:10:35,160
There's Jaz -
that's my wee pal, there.
247
00:10:35,160 --> 00:10:36,680
Hi, Christine, how are you?
248
00:10:36,680 --> 00:10:39,680
Jaz, have you been
introduced to Willie?
249
00:10:39,680 --> 00:10:41,560
Hello, Willie. Awright, Willie.
250
00:10:41,560 --> 00:10:43,080
Who's this?
251
00:10:43,080 --> 00:10:45,920
That's Eric's son.
And this is his...
252
00:10:45,920 --> 00:10:48,080
pal, Jaz.
253
00:10:48,080 --> 00:10:50,520
So what brings you two over this
neck of the woods then, eh?
254
00:10:50,520 --> 00:10:54,040
Oh, we were just in at the estate
agent's and we thought we'd drop by.
255
00:10:54,040 --> 00:10:55,800
We put an offer in on a flat.
256
00:10:55,800 --> 00:10:57,520
Oh, my goodness, have you?
257
00:10:57,520 --> 00:10:58,840
Don't say anything yet,
258
00:10:58,840 --> 00:11:01,240
we're just waiting to hear
if it's been accepted.
259
00:11:01,240 --> 00:11:03,720
Don't want to tempt fate,
we're not telling anyone about it.
260
00:11:04,840 --> 00:11:07,040
What is it? We've just put
an offer in on a flat.
261
00:11:07,040 --> 00:11:08,480
Aw, smashing.
262
00:11:08,480 --> 00:11:11,000
Nothing's confirmed,
we're still waiting to hear,
263
00:11:11,000 --> 00:11:12,680
so just keep it to yourself now, eh?
264
00:11:12,680 --> 00:11:14,200
Course I will.
265
00:11:14,200 --> 00:11:16,240
Hey, Cath, they just
bought a hoose.
266
00:11:16,240 --> 00:11:19,720
Woohoo! Oh, that is great news.
267
00:11:19,720 --> 00:11:22,760
You're getting out
of that nasty little flat.
268
00:11:26,920 --> 00:11:30,080
Have you ever been
to Pitlochry, Willie?
269
00:11:30,080 --> 00:11:31,440
No.
270
00:11:31,440 --> 00:11:33,480
So when will you find out?
271
00:11:33,480 --> 00:11:34,960
They're speaking to the owners now
272
00:11:34,960 --> 00:11:36,720
and then they're going to
phone us back.
273
00:11:36,720 --> 00:11:39,080
Are you going to have
a house-warming, Jaz?
274
00:11:39,080 --> 00:11:42,320
Oh, Cathy, let's just wait till they
find out if they've got it, eh?
275
00:11:42,320 --> 00:11:44,840
Remember that one we had
up at our last place, Col?
276
00:11:44,840 --> 00:11:46,480
That was a riot.
277
00:11:46,480 --> 00:11:49,160
One of the neighbour's boys
slid down the banisters
278
00:11:49,160 --> 00:11:51,800
and cut himself all the way up
the inside of his leg,
279
00:11:51,800 --> 00:11:53,840
right up into his
actual bum area.
280
00:11:56,360 --> 00:11:58,400
Sorry we didn't bring
a present or anything.
281
00:11:58,400 --> 00:12:01,320
Aye, we didn't realise it was
your dad's birthday, Colin, sorry.
282
00:12:01,320 --> 00:12:03,840
Don't worry about it -
Beth only brought fudge.
283
00:12:03,840 --> 00:12:05,720
Aw, I love fudge.
284
00:12:05,720 --> 00:12:09,080
Do you, Jaz? Col, get the fudge -
Jaz wants some.
285
00:12:09,080 --> 00:12:11,760
Are you a fudge fan, Willie?
286
00:12:11,760 --> 00:12:13,480
Naw.
287
00:12:13,480 --> 00:12:18,200
Aw, come on, a wee bit of fudge
wi' a cup of tea, lovely.
288
00:12:18,200 --> 00:12:20,160
Jaz, help me rip it.
289
00:12:22,120 --> 00:12:23,600
That's it.
290
00:12:23,600 --> 00:12:25,760
Oh, poo.
291
00:12:25,760 --> 00:12:27,360
There you are.
292
00:12:27,360 --> 00:12:28,760
Christine?
293
00:12:28,760 --> 00:12:30,600
Thanks very much.
294
00:12:30,600 --> 00:12:32,200
Dad, do you want a bit?
295
00:12:32,200 --> 00:12:34,080
Go on, Willie. Go on, Dad.
296
00:12:34,080 --> 00:12:35,480
Go on, Willie!
297
00:12:37,240 --> 00:12:38,760
Oh, Beth,
298
00:12:38,760 --> 00:12:42,480
that is fucking tremendous.
299
00:12:42,480 --> 00:12:46,640
It's like biting into
a big thick cushion, so it is.
300
00:12:46,640 --> 00:12:50,200
Oh, here, Sophie, wait
till you get your teeth into that.
301
00:12:50,200 --> 00:12:51,640
There she goes.
302
00:12:51,640 --> 00:12:53,480
Yum-yum for baby.
303
00:12:53,480 --> 00:12:56,560
Boy, oh boy, Beth,
that is as creamy as anything.
304
00:12:56,560 --> 00:12:58,080
Have you tried a bit, Cath?
305
00:12:58,080 --> 00:13:01,080
Eh, no. My back teeth
are going all gooey with it.
306
00:13:01,080 --> 00:13:03,280
Aye, well, don't fill
yourselves up with fudge -
307
00:13:03,280 --> 00:13:06,400
Cathy's getting some food
on the go, aren't you, Cath?
308
00:13:06,400 --> 00:13:08,720
Yeah. Marks and Spencer's, Sophie.
309
00:13:08,720 --> 00:13:12,320
Oh. Is it platefuls you're doing,
Cathy, or just a buffet?
310
00:13:12,320 --> 00:13:13,880
Just a buffet, in't that right Cath?
311
00:13:13,880 --> 00:13:15,160
Yeah. And when are we having it?
312
00:13:15,160 --> 00:13:17,240
Once I've done the fudge!
313
00:13:17,240 --> 00:13:18,280
Colin.
314
00:13:19,600 --> 00:13:20,640
Honestly.
315
00:13:22,600 --> 00:13:23,960
I want food now.
316
00:13:25,680 --> 00:13:27,400
All I've had's a biscuit.
317
00:13:27,400 --> 00:13:30,400
Aw, are you
no' feeding this man, Cathy?
318
00:13:30,400 --> 00:13:33,000
Maybe we should just get
something to eat now, Cath?
319
00:13:33,000 --> 00:13:35,600
Aye, I'm actually
a wee bit peckish myself.
320
00:13:35,600 --> 00:13:38,280
All right, all right,
I'm going, I'm going.
321
00:13:40,080 --> 00:13:45,560
Nothing salady for me, Cathy,
takes up too much room on the plate.
322
00:13:45,560 --> 00:13:50,120
And remember, for Sophie, no quiche,
no prawns, no salmon,
323
00:13:50,120 --> 00:13:52,880
no soft cheese,
no chicken on the skewers.
324
00:13:52,880 --> 00:13:55,080
You can eat chicken when you're
pregnant can you no?
325
00:13:55,080 --> 00:13:59,640
Oh, aye. She just keeps jabbing the
roof of her mouth wi' the sticks.
326
00:13:59,640 --> 00:14:01,120
Do you want a hand, Cathy?
327
00:14:01,120 --> 00:14:04,320
No, no, no, you're all right.
You stay there, I've got this.
328
00:14:07,400 --> 00:14:11,920
# A finger of fudge is just
enough to give your kids a treat
329
00:14:11,920 --> 00:14:16,240
# De dee de diddly dee dee
de dee de dee de dee
330
00:14:16,240 --> 00:14:19,880
# De diddly de de mm hmm mmm... #
331
00:14:19,880 --> 00:14:21,040
CATHY: Beth!
332
00:14:22,480 --> 00:14:23,920
Beth!
333
00:14:25,120 --> 00:14:27,600
Any chance of a hand?
334
00:14:27,600 --> 00:14:28,960
Sure.
335
00:14:36,760 --> 00:14:39,320
OK, what have you done so far?
336
00:14:39,320 --> 00:14:41,400
I've opened a big packet of crisps.
337
00:14:43,440 --> 00:14:44,920
OK. Right.
338
00:14:44,920 --> 00:14:48,640
What we'll do is we'll
get the nibbly stuff on to these.
339
00:14:48,640 --> 00:14:52,040
It'll be fine, everyone's beginning
to relax and enjoy themselves.
340
00:14:52,040 --> 00:14:53,360
You don't have to worry.
341
00:14:53,360 --> 00:14:54,520
If you could just...
342
00:14:57,600 --> 00:14:58,760
Oh.
343
00:15:03,040 --> 00:15:04,400
Willie.
344
00:15:06,920 --> 00:15:07,960
Willie.
345
00:15:09,440 --> 00:15:10,640
Willie!
346
00:15:10,640 --> 00:15:12,280
What?
347
00:15:12,280 --> 00:15:15,840
Do you remember that newsagents
that used to be in the corner
348
00:15:15,840 --> 00:15:17,800
where the big Tesco's is built?
349
00:15:17,800 --> 00:15:19,080
Naw.
350
00:15:19,080 --> 00:15:22,160
Well, apparently the guy
that used to have that
351
00:15:22,160 --> 00:15:25,760
has recently been accused of
filming up a woman's skirt
352
00:15:25,760 --> 00:15:27,360
on a train to Edinburgh.
353
00:15:27,360 --> 00:15:29,360
As I says to Sophie,
354
00:15:29,360 --> 00:15:33,400
it's just as well that I normally
wear my joggers when I'm travelling.
355
00:15:34,880 --> 00:15:38,960
You all right there, Willie? You
getting a nice chat with Christine?
356
00:15:38,960 --> 00:15:40,520
Chat, chat, chat!
357
00:15:40,520 --> 00:15:43,080
Would either of you boys
care for a wee whisky?
358
00:15:43,080 --> 00:15:45,160
No, I'm fine. I can't drink spirits.
359
00:15:45,160 --> 00:15:46,960
Och, on ye go,
just try a wee one.
360
00:15:46,960 --> 00:15:48,560
MOBILE RINGS
361
00:15:48,560 --> 00:15:49,720
Cheers.
362
00:15:51,480 --> 00:15:53,560
'Sake.
363
00:15:53,560 --> 00:15:54,720
JAZ RETCHES
364
00:15:54,720 --> 00:15:55,760
Hello.
365
00:15:56,840 --> 00:15:57,960
Speaking.
366
00:16:00,160 --> 00:16:01,520
Oh.
367
00:16:01,520 --> 00:16:02,960
Right, OK.
368
00:16:04,600 --> 00:16:05,720
Uh-huh.
369
00:16:07,640 --> 00:16:10,960
OK, I'll talk to Jaz
and see what he thinks.
370
00:16:10,960 --> 00:16:12,200
I'll phone you back.
371
00:16:13,440 --> 00:16:14,640
Bye.
372
00:16:17,160 --> 00:16:18,840
Sorry.
373
00:16:18,840 --> 00:16:19,960
Too low.
374
00:16:20,960 --> 00:16:22,160
They knocked it back.
375
00:16:22,160 --> 00:16:24,160
Aw, no. Oh, dear.
376
00:16:24,160 --> 00:16:26,520
Oh, that's a right old
kick in the nuts, that.
377
00:16:26,520 --> 00:16:27,600
What's going on?
378
00:16:27,600 --> 00:16:29,960
They just had their offer
on the place knocked back.
379
00:16:29,960 --> 00:16:32,440
I says to them -
bit of a kick in the nuts.
380
00:16:32,440 --> 00:16:33,840
Oh, bang!
381
00:16:33,840 --> 00:16:35,720
Right in the ballsack.
382
00:16:35,720 --> 00:16:38,360
They missed out on
that house they wanted.
383
00:16:38,360 --> 00:16:40,680
They tried to pull a fast one,
going in low.
384
00:16:40,680 --> 00:16:43,960
Now it's backfired, folk selling it
have told them where to stick it.
385
00:16:43,960 --> 00:16:45,600
Bang!
386
00:16:45,600 --> 00:16:47,640
Oh, do you hear that, Sophie?
387
00:16:47,640 --> 00:16:48,920
It's a shame.
388
00:16:48,920 --> 00:16:51,560
Oh, there's Sophie
all upset as well.
389
00:16:51,560 --> 00:16:54,280
The prices they're asking
these days are ridiculous.
390
00:16:54,280 --> 00:16:56,760
Well, this is the property bubble
for you, Eric, in't it?
391
00:16:56,760 --> 00:16:57,880
Aye.
392
00:16:57,880 --> 00:17:00,360
But we all know
what happens to bubbles.
393
00:17:00,360 --> 00:17:01,600
Uh-huh.
394
00:17:01,600 --> 00:17:03,640
They float away.
395
00:17:04,640 --> 00:17:06,080
Right, here we are.
396
00:17:06,080 --> 00:17:07,920
Have you ever been
kicked in the nuts, Willie?
397
00:17:07,920 --> 00:17:09,920
Aye, awright, Cath.
398
00:17:09,920 --> 00:17:12,440
I'm just trying to make him
feel included.
399
00:17:12,440 --> 00:17:15,960
Beth, nightmare. He just heard
from the estate agent.
400
00:17:15,960 --> 00:17:19,160
They didnae get it.
The offer was rejected. Oh.
401
00:17:19,160 --> 00:17:21,280
Bash, boof, ah!
402
00:17:21,280 --> 00:17:22,600
Right in the balls!
403
00:17:25,080 --> 00:17:26,400
Why did they reject it?
404
00:17:26,400 --> 00:17:28,400
It's the bubble, Beth.
405
00:17:28,400 --> 00:17:31,880
What? Beth, come on,
hand the food round.
406
00:17:31,880 --> 00:17:33,840
Sorry, Willie.
407
00:17:33,840 --> 00:17:35,840
Can yous offer any higher?
408
00:17:35,840 --> 00:17:39,040
See, they offered low,
trying to get it on the cheap
409
00:17:39,040 --> 00:17:42,040
and now the guy's got them over a
barrel. It's an absolute mess.
410
00:17:42,040 --> 00:17:44,240
Can we offer any higher?
411
00:17:44,240 --> 00:17:45,640
I don't know.
412
00:17:45,640 --> 00:17:47,000
What do you think?
413
00:17:47,000 --> 00:17:48,560
Beth, could I get a napkin?
414
00:17:53,720 --> 00:17:56,320
How much more do you reckon
you'd have to offer?
415
00:17:56,320 --> 00:17:57,840
Mmm, I dunno.
416
00:17:57,840 --> 00:18:00,320
Two grand?
Oh, here we go again.
417
00:18:00,320 --> 00:18:02,360
Three? Four?
418
00:18:02,360 --> 00:18:04,000
I mean, five seems a lot.
419
00:18:04,000 --> 00:18:07,160
Does it? I mean,
you've already pissed them off once.
420
00:18:07,160 --> 00:18:10,000
We can't afford
another £5,000, can we?
421
00:18:10,000 --> 00:18:12,200
£5,000, Willie.
422
00:18:12,200 --> 00:18:15,480
I bet that's more than you've
earned in your entire life.
423
00:18:16,600 --> 00:18:19,640
Christ, how old does she think I am?
424
00:18:19,640 --> 00:18:21,600
I don't know what to do.
425
00:18:21,600 --> 00:18:23,120
Offer 5,000 more.
426
00:18:24,320 --> 00:18:25,440
What?
427
00:18:25,440 --> 00:18:28,040
Offer five grand on top of what
you offered already.
428
00:18:28,040 --> 00:18:29,680
We'll... We'll give you the money.
429
00:18:33,360 --> 00:18:35,720
You all right, Dad,
you enjoying yourself?
430
00:18:35,720 --> 00:18:36,840
Naw.
431
00:18:39,840 --> 00:18:41,520
Anybody care for a wee top up?
432
00:18:41,520 --> 00:18:45,800
Oh, come on, that's Willie's whisky.
We cannae drink the lot.
433
00:18:45,800 --> 00:18:47,280
Do you no' want another one?
434
00:18:47,280 --> 00:18:48,480
I never said that.
435
00:18:48,480 --> 00:18:51,080
I'll need to get some
more ginger ale. Cath...
436
00:18:52,480 --> 00:18:53,600
Beth, mixer.
437
00:18:55,080 --> 00:18:56,360
Here, I'll take one.
438
00:18:56,360 --> 00:18:57,480
Allow me, squire.
439
00:18:59,200 --> 00:19:01,400
When I was on that bus tour
to Pitlochry
440
00:19:01,400 --> 00:19:05,440
there was an option of an overnight
for you, a dinner and dance.
441
00:19:05,440 --> 00:19:07,680
Or is it a dinner and a ceilidh?
442
00:19:07,680 --> 00:19:10,960
Oh, I love ceilidhs.
443
00:19:10,960 --> 00:19:12,680
Why did you not go?
444
00:19:12,680 --> 00:19:16,360
Oh, well, I like my own bed
and Pat couldnae be arsed.
445
00:19:16,360 --> 00:19:19,960
Do you remember that ceilidh we
went up to at the time-share, Col?
446
00:19:19,960 --> 00:19:22,560
Remember where that woman
smashed her pelvis?
447
00:19:22,560 --> 00:19:24,920
Aye. Aw, they're great fun.
448
00:19:24,920 --> 00:19:27,040
I'll tell you who used
to go to a lot of ceilidhs.
449
00:19:27,040 --> 00:19:28,080
Who?
450
00:19:30,200 --> 00:19:32,920
What? You were a man for
the ceilidhs, were you no'?
451
00:19:32,920 --> 00:19:36,040
Och, aye, but that
was a long time ago.
452
00:19:36,040 --> 00:19:37,640
Oh, you liked to dance, Willie?
453
00:19:37,640 --> 00:19:41,280
It wisnae the dancing. He was
playing in the band - accordion.
454
00:19:41,280 --> 00:19:43,880
Aye? Play the accordion,
do you, Willie?
455
00:19:43,880 --> 00:19:45,000
Aye, a wee bit.
456
00:19:45,000 --> 00:19:47,320
A bit? He was
practically professional.
457
00:19:47,320 --> 00:19:49,440
I had an uncle used
to play the bagpipes.
458
00:19:49,440 --> 00:19:50,720
Did you, Eric?
459
00:19:50,720 --> 00:19:52,200
Did you hear that, Sophie?
460
00:19:52,200 --> 00:19:54,880
Eric had an uncle that
used to play the bagpipes.
461
00:19:54,880 --> 00:19:58,160
Oh, Sophie used to play
the clarinet, as well.
462
00:19:58,160 --> 00:20:00,200
She was quite good too, eh?
463
00:20:00,200 --> 00:20:01,560
What was it again, you...?
464
00:20:01,560 --> 00:20:04,000
Oh, aye, Pop Goes The Weasel.
465
00:20:05,040 --> 00:20:08,560
# Dee de dee de diddly dee
dee dee de dee dee... #
466
00:20:08,560 --> 00:20:09,600
Christine...
467
00:20:09,600 --> 00:20:11,320
# De de de diddly de de
de de de de... #
468
00:20:11,320 --> 00:20:12,880
Christine!
# De diddly de de de de... #
469
00:20:12,880 --> 00:20:13,920
Naw, Christine...
470
00:20:13,920 --> 00:20:15,360
# De diddly de de de de
de de de de...#
471
00:20:15,360 --> 00:20:17,760
You're away on
A Finger Of Fudge, Christine.
472
00:20:17,760 --> 00:20:19,840
Aw, shite, so I am.
473
00:20:19,840 --> 00:20:22,160
Here, Dad, you know what
I've got up the stairs?
474
00:20:22,160 --> 00:20:24,680
Naw. Your accordion. Hmm?
475
00:20:24,680 --> 00:20:26,880
Will I away and get it
and you can give us a wee tune?
476
00:20:26,880 --> 00:20:28,160
ALL: Yeah!
477
00:20:28,160 --> 00:20:29,480
Oh, no, no, no.
478
00:20:29,480 --> 00:20:31,680
Go on, Willie,
it's your birthday.
479
00:20:31,680 --> 00:20:33,240
Do something. Two ticks.
480
00:20:35,120 --> 00:20:38,760
# De dee de diddly dee dee
dee de dee de dee
481
00:20:38,760 --> 00:20:40,800
# De diddly de de de de
482
00:20:40,800 --> 00:20:42,680
# Pop goes the weasel. #
483
00:20:42,680 --> 00:20:43,760
Och.
484
00:20:43,760 --> 00:20:48,720
See, I'm the same wi'
Itsy Bitsy Polka Dot Bikini, Beth.
485
00:20:48,720 --> 00:20:51,680
I just start humming it and before
I know it,
486
00:20:51,680 --> 00:20:55,000
I'm straight into the theme song
fae Benny Hill.
487
00:20:55,000 --> 00:20:56,640
So ah am, amn't I, Sophie?
488
00:20:56,640 --> 00:20:57,720
Yep.
489
00:20:57,720 --> 00:21:00,080
I blame Jive Bunny, Willie.
490
00:21:00,080 --> 00:21:04,840
Oh, those megamixes they brought
out just scrambled me.
491
00:21:04,840 --> 00:21:07,520
Ho, ho, ho. Here she is!
492
00:21:07,520 --> 00:21:09,240
ALL: Whoa!
493
00:21:09,240 --> 00:21:11,960
Right, let's see
what we've got here, eh?
494
00:21:11,960 --> 00:21:13,720
You going to give us
a tune, are you, Willie?
495
00:21:13,720 --> 00:21:16,120
Oh, Col, give me a shot,
gie us a shot. OK.
496
00:21:16,120 --> 00:21:18,120
Whoo! Got it?
497
00:21:18,120 --> 00:21:19,360
That's you, haud on.
498
00:21:19,360 --> 00:21:20,760
Oh!
499
00:21:23,320 --> 00:21:24,960
# Here comes the Highland granny,
500
00:21:24,960 --> 00:21:27,280
# Great big tits
and a hairy fanny. #
501
00:21:30,320 --> 00:21:32,400
It's not working, it's broken Colin.
502
00:21:32,400 --> 00:21:35,600
Aye. Quite a lot of money
these things cost, you know.
503
00:21:35,600 --> 00:21:39,280
We had this valued last year,
you know, for insurance purposes.
504
00:21:39,280 --> 00:21:41,440
But, there you go, Dad.
505
00:21:41,440 --> 00:21:44,600
Aye, this'll bring back
a few happy memories, eh?
506
00:21:44,600 --> 00:21:46,800
Aye, your grandad got me this.
507
00:21:46,800 --> 00:21:49,720
Jeezo, that must have cost him
a few weeks' wages, eh?
508
00:21:49,720 --> 00:21:50,800
Not many.
509
00:21:50,800 --> 00:21:54,680
He nicked it from a wee blind boy
outside the bus station.
510
00:21:54,680 --> 00:21:58,040
Look at that, Sophie,
I bet you wish you'd kept going
511
00:21:58,040 --> 00:21:59,560
with your clarinet, eh?
512
00:21:59,560 --> 00:22:01,920
You could be up here
playing with Willie.
513
00:22:01,920 --> 00:22:03,720
There you go, Dad, that's you.
514
00:22:03,720 --> 00:22:05,840
ACCORDION PLAYS
515
00:22:08,280 --> 00:22:10,680
CHEERING
516
00:22:10,680 --> 00:22:12,080
What about that, eh?
517
00:22:12,080 --> 00:22:13,440
That was terrific.
518
00:22:13,440 --> 00:22:14,800
Right, that's enough.
519
00:22:14,800 --> 00:22:16,440
Oh, come on, Willie,
give us another one.
520
00:22:16,440 --> 00:22:18,360
Jaz, Jaz, get up, get up, get up.
521
00:22:18,360 --> 00:22:19,680
Dance!
522
00:22:19,680 --> 00:22:21,760
Willie, give us another one
so Jaz can dance to it.
523
00:22:21,760 --> 00:22:23,680
He doesn't want to, Cathy.
524
00:22:23,680 --> 00:22:25,520
He's gay, of course he wants to!
525
00:22:25,520 --> 00:22:27,600
Remember Scottish
country dancing at school?
526
00:22:27,600 --> 00:22:29,360
Did you ever do that, Eric?
Oh, aye.
527
00:22:29,360 --> 00:22:32,040
Drops Of Brandy, Gay Gordons,
Strip The Willow.
528
00:22:32,040 --> 00:22:35,000
Strip The Willow!
That's it. Play us a reel, Dad.
529
00:22:35,000 --> 00:22:36,800
Naw. Right.
530
00:22:36,800 --> 00:22:40,280
We have gone to a lot
of trouble today, Willie,
531
00:22:40,280 --> 00:22:42,400
all for your birthday.
532
00:22:42,400 --> 00:22:45,480
The least you could do
is give us a wee tune on your...
533
00:22:45,480 --> 00:22:47,240
That thing there, mmm.
534
00:22:48,960 --> 00:22:50,400
Play, Willie!
535
00:22:50,400 --> 00:22:52,880
Right, one more.
536
00:22:52,880 --> 00:22:54,440
CHEERING
537
00:22:55,960 --> 00:22:57,600
Beth, move that table.
538
00:22:57,600 --> 00:23:00,440
Beth, come on. Hurry up!
539
00:23:00,440 --> 00:23:01,800
Don't drag it.
540
00:23:01,800 --> 00:23:04,200
Come on. Eric, up you get
and take a partner.
541
00:23:04,200 --> 00:23:06,600
Up, up, up!
Sophie, come on, wee dance.
542
00:23:06,600 --> 00:23:08,880
No. Shift, Willie. Come on, Soph'.
543
00:23:08,880 --> 00:23:11,960
Move that back.
Move him, move him over there.
544
00:23:13,440 --> 00:23:14,640
Sophie!
545
00:23:15,800 --> 00:23:19,000
That's you.
Right, get yourself sorted.
546
00:23:19,000 --> 00:23:20,040
Right.
547
00:23:20,040 --> 00:23:22,120
Oh, Jaz, Jaz.
548
00:23:22,120 --> 00:23:25,400
You should be wearing
a kilt with no pants.
549
00:23:25,400 --> 00:23:26,520
I don't know what I'm doing!
550
00:23:26,520 --> 00:23:27,960
It's country dancing, Jaz.
551
00:23:27,960 --> 00:23:30,560
It's easy, you just,
you run up and down and scream!
552
00:23:30,560 --> 00:23:32,600
Right, we'll do...
553
00:23:32,600 --> 00:23:35,080
We'll do Strip The Willow, Dad, eh?
554
00:23:35,080 --> 00:23:37,800
Yeah, ceilidh! Yahoo!
555
00:23:37,800 --> 00:23:39,240
Right, Jaz, what you do is,
556
00:23:39,240 --> 00:23:42,040
you go into the middle to meet
your partner and spin round.
557
00:23:42,040 --> 00:23:43,480
That's it.
558
00:23:43,480 --> 00:23:45,520
Oh, stop it, Jaz. Jaz, please.
559
00:23:45,520 --> 00:23:47,400
And just go right
doon the line with her.
560
00:23:47,400 --> 00:23:50,640
That's you, till you get to the end.
That's it.
561
00:23:50,640 --> 00:23:51,840
That's it, Cathy.
562
00:23:51,840 --> 00:23:53,720
And do a wee spin at the bottom.
563
00:23:53,720 --> 00:23:55,920
And, well, you know,
basically that's it.
564
00:23:55,920 --> 00:23:58,040
We've got it, we've got it.
Come on, let's do it.
565
00:23:58,040 --> 00:23:59,280
Right, you ready, Dad?
566
00:23:59,280 --> 00:24:01,280
ACCORDION PLAYS
567
00:24:20,440 --> 00:24:22,280
Now careful, Ian,
568
00:24:22,280 --> 00:24:24,920
she's spewing up
at the drop of a hat the now.
569
00:24:24,920 --> 00:24:26,360
I'm fine, I'm fine.
570
00:24:29,160 --> 00:24:31,760
Oh, let Jaz and Ian spin together.
571
00:24:31,760 --> 00:24:34,400
They're gay, equal rights!
572
00:24:56,160 --> 00:24:59,640
Jaz! Jaz! Jaz! Jaz! Jaz!
573
00:25:01,120 --> 00:25:02,720
Jaz, stop.
574
00:25:03,800 --> 00:25:05,400
Jaz, Jaz!
575
00:25:06,840 --> 00:25:08,640
Are you all right, Christine?
576
00:25:08,640 --> 00:25:11,040
Silly wee bastard.
577
00:25:11,040 --> 00:25:12,280
I'm so sorry, Christine.
578
00:25:12,280 --> 00:25:13,800
It was an accident.
579
00:25:13,800 --> 00:25:15,000
Mum, take Eric's hand.
580
00:25:15,000 --> 00:25:16,440
Here, Christine give us your hand.
581
00:25:16,440 --> 00:25:18,320
Aye, all right, give us a minute.
582
00:25:19,360 --> 00:25:22,800
Sorry, Willie, apologies, my friend.
583
00:25:22,800 --> 00:25:24,480
It's no' your fault.
584
00:25:24,480 --> 00:25:25,600
Though...
585
00:25:25,600 --> 00:25:27,920
why we couldnae
have left that fucking thing
586
00:25:27,920 --> 00:25:29,960
in the cupboard, I don't know.
587
00:25:29,960 --> 00:25:31,560
Aw, shit! What is it?
588
00:25:31,560 --> 00:25:33,000
Missed call from the estate agent.
589
00:25:33,000 --> 00:25:34,800
Willie, go again.
590
00:25:34,800 --> 00:25:37,440
Hang on, Cathy, and wait until
Ian's made his phone call.
591
00:25:37,440 --> 00:25:39,640
Oh, pardon me at my own party.
592
00:25:40,960 --> 00:25:44,440
Oh, landed right
on my tail bone there.
593
00:25:44,440 --> 00:25:47,240
Wait till you see the big giant
bruise at the top of my arse
594
00:25:47,240 --> 00:25:49,040
in the morning, Jaz.
595
00:25:49,040 --> 00:25:52,680
Really? No, no that's amazing.
596
00:25:52,680 --> 00:25:53,960
Brilliant. Bye.
597
00:25:55,200 --> 00:25:56,440
We got it! Yes.
598
00:25:56,440 --> 00:25:58,840
We got the house,
they accepted the offer.
599
00:25:58,840 --> 00:26:00,800
Aw, well done. Fantastic!
600
00:26:00,800 --> 00:26:03,360
Celebration. Come on, Willie,
give us another one.
601
00:26:03,360 --> 00:26:04,600
Naw.
602
00:26:04,600 --> 00:26:07,200
Come on! Naw, I'm needing the loo.
603
00:26:07,200 --> 00:26:09,280
Right hold on, Dad,
I'll get that for you.
604
00:26:09,280 --> 00:26:11,360
Now, do you know where it is?
605
00:26:11,360 --> 00:26:13,920
And it's...
It's the wee button for a pee.
606
00:26:13,920 --> 00:26:15,240
Aye,
607
00:26:15,240 --> 00:26:16,640
we'll see how much comes oot.
608
00:26:26,240 --> 00:26:27,720
I think he's enjoyed it.
609
00:26:27,720 --> 00:26:32,280
Aye, he has, aye, compared to what
he was like when he came in.
610
00:26:32,280 --> 00:26:34,080
Well, maybe the nurses
are right, you know?
611
00:26:34,080 --> 00:26:36,200
He's just needing
some time with the family.
612
00:26:36,200 --> 00:26:37,960
Oh, bless.
613
00:26:37,960 --> 00:26:40,240
I feel bad about him
going back up there tonight.
614
00:26:40,240 --> 00:26:43,000
Why do you not just see
if he's wanting to stay over?
615
00:26:43,000 --> 00:26:47,560
Aye, every birthday's precious when
you get to that age, in't it Sophie?
616
00:26:47,560 --> 00:26:49,320
Aye, why not?
617
00:26:49,320 --> 00:26:51,240
Cath, what do you reckon?
618
00:26:51,240 --> 00:26:53,080
Beth will give you
a hand with his breakfast.
619
00:26:53,080 --> 00:26:54,360
TOILET FLUSHES
620
00:26:56,120 --> 00:26:57,880
OK then.
621
00:26:57,880 --> 00:26:59,080
Brilliant.
622
00:27:02,720 --> 00:27:05,600
Dad, we were just saying,
me and Cath,
623
00:27:05,600 --> 00:27:08,800
we know things aren't ideal
up at the home,
624
00:27:08,800 --> 00:27:13,000
but we've had a good day and we've
all enjoyed ourselves
625
00:27:13,000 --> 00:27:17,440
so, how would you just like to...
to stay the night?
626
00:27:17,440 --> 00:27:18,680
Where, here?
627
00:27:18,680 --> 00:27:20,560
Aye. Stay the whole night?
628
00:27:20,560 --> 00:27:21,920
Cath'll cook us a bit of dinner
629
00:27:21,920 --> 00:27:24,720
and we'll make up a bed
for you down here.
630
00:27:24,720 --> 00:27:25,920
What do you say?
631
00:27:27,480 --> 00:27:28,800
Naw.
632
00:27:32,200 --> 00:27:35,960
# Oh Willie, oh Willie
633
00:27:35,960 --> 00:27:39,840
# Every kiss I get from Willie
is a dilly
634
00:27:39,840 --> 00:27:42,920
# Willie, oh Willie
635
00:27:42,920 --> 00:27:47,280
# I'm so much in love with Willie
that it's silly
636
00:27:47,280 --> 00:27:50,600
# Willie, he's such a honey
637
00:27:50,600 --> 00:27:54,800
# When he looks at me
I go all kind of funny
638
00:27:54,800 --> 00:27:56,960
# Willie, oh Willie
639
00:27:56,960 --> 00:27:59,640
# I just go for darling Willie
willy nilly. #
72014
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