Original subtitles

[theme music]

Love, I'm going.

Yes, I hope you have a lovely day on the golf

course in the rough.

What's the matter with you?

You know, you could have gotten up early this morning

and given me a hand.

I have 10 lunches to fix.

10 lunches?

What for?

Well Linda's Brownie troop will be here any minute,

and I'm taking them on a picnic in the park.

And I still have sandwiches to fix

and I have to wrap them and do everything else.

And I have to do it all by myself.

Lover, if you wanted me to help you, why didn't you ask?

All right.

Would you help me wrap a few sandwiches right now?

You're too late.

I got to go.

Oh!

Well you could have asked me before,

but Charlie will be here any minute.

[doorbell]

Boy oh boy, that's probably him now.

Jeepers creepers.

Women.

Oh.

Come in, come in.

You don't look like a Brownie.

Are you a Brownie?

Haven't made up my mind yet.

Oh?

My mother wants me to be one.

But I think they're all pretty stuck up.

DANNY: Oh?

Who are you?

My name is Williams.

Mr. Williams.

I heard about you.

Oh?

You're a rich actor.

Are those flowers real?

Why, yes they are.

I wouldn't want to live in a big apartment like this.

And I wouldn't want to have all this fancy furniture

because I'd have to worry about getting it dirty.

And I don't think you're such a big shot.

Hi Susan, you're early.

Hi.

Hello Susan.

Linda, would you go in the kitchen

and help wrap some sandwiches?

You too Susan.

I don't have to help.

I'm not a Brownie yet.

Then you can just watch.

Yeah, come on Susan.

The kid been taking mean pills or something?

Oh, honey.

You have to have a little understanding of her.

She has a problem.

She has a problem?

You mean the world's got a problem because she's in it.

What a little brat.

I says to her are you a Brownie.

She says I haven't made up my mind yet.

Get a load of that.

Well honey, she pretends that she's not sure whether or not

she wants to be a Brownie because I don't think

she can afford the uniform.

Her mother is very poor.

She's a widow.

And she has four children to support.

Well I wasn't born with a silver steam

shovel in my mouth.

I mean, we were very poor when I was a kid.

But I didn't go around hating everybody

that was eating regular.

Well different people react differently.

And I'd love to stay here and explain all this to you.

But I've got a lot more work to do in the kitchen.

So go play golf.

Enjoy yourself.

Thanks a lot.

Hi Dad.

Bye Dad.

Whoa, whoa, whoa. Come back.

What is that?

Hi Dad, bye Dad?

I'm going out to the park to play ball.

Wait a minute.

What do you mean you're going to play ball?

Didn't you promise me yesterday that you'd

do your Spanish homework this morning?

Homework?

Spanish?

This morning?

Yeah.

I don't recall anything like that on my appointment book.

Russell.

Come back.

I'll refresh your memory.

Yesterday afternoon, you begged me to let you go to the movie.

I said OK, but you promised that you

would do your Spanish homework this morning.

Yesterday?

Movie?

Promised?

Now what's a matter with your voice?

Why don't you oil it?

Dad, my voice is changing.

Well not for the better, I assure you.

Russell, please go and do your homework.

Dad, I hate homework.

Look, there's a lot of things in life we hate to do.

But we have to do them.

Now you've got to face up to your responsibilities

and your obligations.

One day you'll be very very thankful to me

that I made you study Spanish.

Why?

Because it'll come in handy for you someday.

How?

You'll work for Desi Arnaz.

I don't know how.

Now look.

We've been over this 1,000 times.

And I keep saying it and you keep forgetting it.

You cannot shirk your responsibility.

You have obligations.

Remember that.

Don't be one of these people who keeps putting things off.

[crash]

LINDA: Oh.

Danny.

Why do you keep putting things off?

Now what'd I do?

It's what you didn't do.

Didn't you promise me yesterday that you would track down

that loose rug in the hall?

Yesterday?

Promised?

You left out loose rug.

Loose r--

Go pick up the dishes.

Danny will you please stop stalling

and go fix it right now?

Sweetheart, I haven't got time to fix it now.

Oh, you always have some excuse for putting things off.

Where does it say things have to be done on a timetable

for goodness sakes?

All right.

Jeepers creepers.

RUSTY: You know Dad?

What?

You ought to turn over a new leaf.

You know, you got to meet your responsibilities

and your obligations.

[doorbell]

Answer the door.

[chattering]

Honey, the girls are here.

[crash]

KATHY: Oh!

What, what?

What's the matter? What's wrong?

What honey? - Oh, dear.

I twisted my ankle.

You twisted-- how did you do that?

I tripped over that loose rug.

You tripped over the rug?

You know it was loose.

Why didn't you get somebody to tack it up?

Move your ankle.

Move it.

It's not broken.

Probably just a little sprain.

See if you can stand on it.

I better be able to.

I have to take these kids-- oh!

Oh.

Uh oh. - Honey?

Oh.

I don't know how I'm going to go on a picnic.

Are you kidding?

No.

Well where did you say you have to go on this picnic

anyway?

Oh honey, I promised the kids.

All right.

Let one of the other mothers take them.

Danny, they're all busy.

Well that's too bad.

Then you're just going to have to call it off.

That's all. - I can't call it off.

I promised them.

I can't disappoint them.

I can't let you go to the park like that.

Not on that ankle. It will swell up like a balloon.

I'll explain it to the kids.

Rusty. Rusty.

Get an ice pack for your mother.

I think she sprained her ankle.

Oh.

I bet she did it so she wouldn't have to take us.

That's not true.

Well is she going to take us?

Well I don't think she'll be able to.

That figures.

Now, children--

[girls protesting]

Hold it, will you?

Please?

You sound like a plague of locusts.

Wait a minute.

Let me talk.

Huh?

He likes to talk, doesn't he?

All right.

You're not babies anymore, are you?

Right.

You're full grown young ladies.

Right?

Now, since you're a full grown young ladies,

naturally you're intelligent enough

to understand that if Mrs. Williams has twisted her ankle,

the picnic has got to be called off.

I bet you kicked her.

I did not!

Why don't you take us Daddy?

Me?

[interposing voices]

Just a minute.

As a matter of fact, I went to sleep with my grip

like that all night last night.

I fully intend to play golf today.

I am not going to go on any picnic.

Now, now kids.

That's unfair of you to try to get me to take you to the park

because I have a golf date.

See?

With my boss.

Mr. Halper.

And if I don't show up, he'll fire me.

Don't you understand?

All right, I'll take you.

[cheering]

I have to go open my big mouth.

How do like this?

At my age, I'm a den mother.

Oh boy.

[doorbell]

Come in, it's open.

Hiya Danny.

Hello Charley.

Oh boy, what a beautiful day.

I can't wait to get going.

I've been waiting all week for this.

Oh, we're going to have fun.

You mean, you want to go with me Charley.

Well sure.

Charley.

You-- you really mean that?

Well of course.

You and me together.

Charley, you're a great friend.

Here, you carry the lunches.

What?

Danny, since when do we take food to the golf course?

Oh, Charlie, we're not going golfing.

We're going on a picnic.

On a picnic?

Uh huh.

You and me?

DANNY: That's right.

Danny, I know we're old friends

and I like to do the things you like to do

and a picnic is swell.

But don't you think we'd have more fun playing golf?

We could have more fun playing golf than going on a picnic

with nine beautiful girls.

Nine beautiful girls?

Nine?

Nine girls nine.

My wife will kill me, but I'll do it.

Hi Uncle Charley.

Are you going with us?

Honey, I'd love to go, but Daddy and me,

we're going on a picnic.

You see, what we're gonna-- what we planned--

well, actually, we were gonna--

I mean-- you see what--

what happened with the original-- when we-- uh--

I-- if--

I-- six, seven, eight, nine.

Nine.

Nine.

Now Danny, you are a miserable-- hoo, boy.

Danny.

If you think I'm going to give up my golf game to spend

the afternoon with these lilliputians,

you're out of your cotton picking mind.

Well, I don't know and all, girls. if Uncle Charley

won't go along, I don't see how I

can handle this all by myself.

And well, I'm afraid if Uncle Charley can't go,

we're going to have to call off the picnic.

It's really up to him.

Please Uncle Charley.

You've just got to go.

Why should I?

I mean-- wha-- what's so important about a picnic?

I mean-- I mean wha--

I-- I'm not going to give up my golf game.

You're not going to give up your picnic.

I mean, you don't have to go to the park.

You can have just as much fun here.

You can play-- Linda.

She-- and all the kid-- and then you could--

even if you should--

They get to you.

Don't they Charley?

I'll go.

I'll go.

[cheering]

[singing]

All right.

All right. OK.

OK.

This looks like a nice spot.

OK.

Now you two go up there and open up that basket.

And you can run some of the lunches.

That's fine.

You take that down there.

A couple of you get some kindling right there.

Move along.

Let's do it in an orderly fashion.

Here we go.

Nice going you little soldiers you.

Yes siree Bob.

Yeah?

You fascinate me.

I do?

Wonderful army.

Nine beautiful girls and one hook nosed general.

Oh now.

- Hold this. - Hold it?

Sure darling. I'll hold it.

What's the matter?

Oh, general.

Yeah?

I got a message for you.

Yeah?

The enemy just sneaked up on your rear.

Good afternoon officer.

What-- what do you think you're doing?

Well we're having a picnic with the Brownies here.

Having a picnic?

That's right.

Don't you pay any attention to keep off the grass sides?

Yes sir officer.

Any time I see it keep off the grass sign,

I always keep off the grass.

Any time you see it?

That is right.

All right now. Come on.

Get this stuff out of here.

Pick up the blankets.

Girls, no picnics on the lawn here.

Get it out of here right away.

Clear out, clear out.

But Mr. Policeman.

Where can we go?

Look, I only enforce the law.

I'm a policeman.

I don't make the laws.

Now look kids.

I'm only a cop.

They sort of get to you, don't they?

All right, I'll pretend I didn't see you.

Go ahead and have your picnic.

[cheering]

Hey, you're all right, officer.

Thanks a lot.

Don't bother thanking me.

I did it for the kids.

And listen, no more your shenanigans.

And keep your eye on these signs.

You understand? - Yes sir.

Watch out for the signs. DANNY: Yes sir.

All right.

I'll put it right back.

Yes sir.

Danny boy, this is more fun than playing golf.

Right?

Will you stop heckling and go make a fire for the hot dogs?

Go make a fire.

Carry the coffins. Tote that barge.

Lift the bales.

What are you doing?

I'm starting a fire.

That's not the way Indians do it.

Honey, this may come as a surprise to you,

but I'm not an Indian.

Well you can't do it that way.

You have to rub two sticks together like this.

Susan, come here.

I need you right away.

Here, you do it.

These Indians must have eaten a lot of cold dinners.

Excuse me, Hiawatha.

That's the way to start a fire?

Yeah, like the Indians do.

Well the Indians got a new invention now.

Yeah, the Chok Toks do it like this.

Just like that.

What's the matter?

Little boy blue is here again.

You got kind of a small beat, haven't you?

And now what are you doing?

Starting a fire to roast some weenies.

So I see.

No open fires.

Where do you want me to have a fire?

In my pocket?

Didn't you see the sign that said no open fires?

Don't start with the sign stuff.

Now I put the no grass walking on the grass sign away.

But there is no sign here that says no open fires.

I--

You're using it for kindling wood.

Now look, this is the last time I'm going to tell you.

Any more infractions and I'm running you in.

You understand?

Now look, you can't--

And that goes for you too.

I guess you could.

And mind the signs.

We will.

Don't you know any better than to start

a fire right in front of a sign which it says no open fires?

Me?

What are you blaming me? It's that Susan.

- What? - That little monster.

What do you mean?

This kid has been pulling up all the signs.

She's piled the wood up here.

She started this.

And I tell you another thing, Danny.

If we don't get out of here, she's going to get us arrested.

All right, all right. Just keep your shirt on.

We'll make them a couple of hot dogs and we'll take them home.

Don't get excited. - Daddy?

Yeah honey?

Can we go swimming in that lake over there?

Do you see a sign that says no swimming allowed?

Now whatever the sign says, that's what you have to do.

And it says don't, you don't.

Now you tell the rest of the girls.

Stay away from the signs.

Holy smokes.

What do you got there?

Flowers.

Where'd you get them?

Over there.

From where the sign says do not pick flowers?

It figures. It figures.

What are you?

Some kind of troublemaker? Give me those flowers.

Give them to me.

You give me back those flowers and go with the other girls.

What's the matter with you?

How do you like that?

This could be a lot of trouble here, Charlie.

Take them.

Get those hot dandelions away from me.

Will you please take them?

What for?

Put them back.

Put them back?

Yeah, put them back in the ground.

Go ahead.

You want me to put the flowers back in the ground?

Yeah.

Danny I said it before and I'll say it again.

You're si-- oh, you're sick.

And now what are the Rover boys up to?

We're-- we're planting flowers.

Planting flowers.

Yeah, we-- we want to beautify the park.

You expect me to believe that?

I don't, but I think he does.

Charley!

All right, that's it.

Pick up the flowers. I'm taking you in.

- Taking me in? - That's right.

But officer, I can explain.

You can explain to the judge.

And you too. - Me?

I'm not with him.

I never saw him before in my life.

Come with me and I'll introduce you.

Come on.

Mr. Williams.

You are aware that you weren't supposed to pick those flowers.

Well, yes sir.

But you went ahead and picked them anyway.

Well, I--

Look.

What's the fine for picking flowers?

A minimum fine is $10 or 10 days.

OK, swell.

If that's all it is, let's not make a federal case out of it.

Here's your $10.

It's not going to be as easy as that, my friend.

What?

I get a little annoyed at privileged characters like you

who break the law, pay a few dollars in fines,

and just walk away.

Now just a minute your honor, that's unfair.

I never claimed to be a privileged character.

Your actions claimed it for you.

There's a sign there saying don't pick the flowers.

And you went ahead and picked them.

Didn't you?

Well--

Or maybe you didn't pick them?

Maybe they just jumped out of the ground and into your hands,

Mr. Privileged Character?

Look, I resent this kind of treatment your honor.

I resent the language that you're using.

I'm a legitimate citizen and you're treating

me like I was Jack the Ripper.

You broke the law.

Well I'm willing to pay the fine.

You're in trouble my friend.

And all that money in your pocket

isn't going to get you out of it.

My daddy never breaks the law.

He didn't pick those flowers.

All right, all right sweetie.

I'll tell you who picked--

No, Linda, no.

Let the little girl talk.

I picked them.

Oh for goodness sake, your honor.

She's my daughter and she's just trying to cover up for me.

That's all.

Believe me, she had nothing to do with this.

But I tell you judge, I picked them.

No, sweetheart, no.

My Daddy's just trying to save me from the electric chair.

No!

It's nothing darling.

Please, go back and stand with the rest of the girls.

Will you, please?

Everything is going to be fine.

Now you go ahead.

Look, your honor.

This is no atmosphere for these children.

Why don't you let them wait in the hall?

They had nothing to do with this.

- I think we can let them go. - Thank you.

Thank you very much.

Go on sweetheart.

Daddy, I want to to to jail with you.

I'm not going to jail.

Wait for me in the hall. - But Da--

Wait for me in the hall sweetheart.

All of you. Go ahead.

Go on.

Charley, deal with the girls, will you?

Go ahead.

Look your honor, I want to plead guilty to the charge

and throw myself at the mercy of the court.

This court would show a lot more mercy if it

didn't dislike your attitude.

What's the matter with my attitude?

Now you're an important person.

And you have a responsibility.

And you haven't lived up to it.

And you've set a miserable example for these children.

Now I intend to impose the full penalty of the law.

Maybe that will teach you to--

He didn't do it.

What's that?

You're punishing the wrong person.

No, wait Susan.

Don't say another word.

I just think you're wonderful.

But you didn't do it. I did.

Shh.

Don't say that.

Just-- just go.

Everything will be fine.

You wait out in the hall.

Hold it.

Hold it Mr. Williams.

Come back young lady.

No, no.

I thought we agreed that they're--

Now just a minute.

Young lady.

What didn't he do that you did?

Well he didn't pick the flowers, I did.

You did?

Yes sir.

Why didn't you say so before?

You didn't ask me.

You put the blame on Mr. Williams

and I thought he was going to tell on me.

But he didn't, so I thought to myself, if he wants to get

in trouble, what do I care.

Why should I worry about him?

He doesn't worry about me.

He hates me.

Well surely if he hated you he wouldn't be willing to take

the blame for you.

I thought about that.

That's why I came back.

Now Susan, you saw that sign.

Why did you pick those flowers?

Because they were pretty and I wanted my mom to see them.

She works and doesn't get a chance to go to the park.

Well that explains it.

But it doesn't excuse it.

You know, there's a rule about damaging public property.

And you broke that rule.

Well I know that the law governing children isn't quite

the same as it is for grown ups. Let's

see what the book says here.

Hmm?

Oh, yes.

Here we are.

Special rule covering picking of flowers on Saturday

by a member of the Brownies.

Well, what do you know?

Allowed to pick them one time only.

Case dismissed.

Compliments of the city of New York.

Now I hope your mommy likes them.

Thank you sir.

Mr. Williams, I owe you an apology.

You're a good man.

Thank you, your honor.

So are you.

I like to help people when I can.

You do?

I have a parking ticket here.

Charley!

[doorbell]

Wait now.

Wait a minute.

Well hello Susan.

Don't you look nice in your uniform?

Mommy thought so too.

She borrowed the neighbors' camera

and took a picture of me.

Oh, well that's just wonderful.

It came in a package this morning.

Except I don't know where it came from.

So I have no one to thank.

Oh, you mean there wasn't a card?

Well it just said I hope you enjoy wearing this.

It was signed anonymous.

Well I'm sure you will enjoy wearing it.

Well, what was that for?

No reason.

Just an anonymous kiss.