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[theme music]
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I'll get some liquor.
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I'll get it honey, sit still.
4
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Wonderful evening Kathy,
and your dinner, I tell you
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I give it four stars.
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Aw, thank you, Charlie.
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I'm glad you enjoyed it.
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You know something, I've
eaten in the best restaurants,
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but there's no place in
the world I'd rather eat
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than right here in this house.
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And you want to know why?
I'll tell you why.
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Because it
doesn't cost a cent.
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Because it doesn't--
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no, no-- because I happen
to enjoy Kathy's cooking.
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Oh I'll say you do.
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You know if food
was money, he'd have
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the richest stomach in town.
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The way he attacks a
plate is like a vacuum
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cleaner with teeth.
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00:01:06,066 --> 00:01:07,763
So you've got a
husband who likes to eat,
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there's nothing wrong with that,
and I'm very flattered Charlie.
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Thank you
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How about another piece
of banana cream pie?
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Sure I'd love some--
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No he doesn't want any.
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No I don't want any.
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Why don't I want any?
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Charlie, you know what
happens when you stuff yourself.
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Your stomach starts barking--
you're up all night,
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so no more banana cream pie.
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Bunny you seem to have
forgotten one thing,
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this is America,
land of the free.
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Brave men have fought and died
at Valley Forge in the winter
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of '76 so that I,
Charley Halper,
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could be born with
the inalienable right
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to eat what I please!
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Does that mean you
want another piece
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of banana cream pie?
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No it means I studied
American history.
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Ah, that's it,
of course he can't.
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Now you're being sensible.
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Oh listen honey you better
take one of your green pills
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and give your little stuffed
body a chance for a comeback.
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Thank you Dr. Schweitzer.
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Bunny, a little
creme de menthe?
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Oh!
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Oh yes I'd love something
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DANNY: Fine, fine.
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How about you Charlie, would
you like a little brandy?
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Yeah Danny--
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No he doesn't want any.
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You know, 10 years ago at
our wedding, I said I do.
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That was the last time I was
allowed to answer for myself.
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Charlie you know I only
do it for your own good,
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this stuff is poison for you.
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Can I help it, I'm
crazy about poison!
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Fine so who-- who in
the middle of the night,
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when you wake up screaming,
has to come to your rescue?
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Me!
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00:02:28,322 --> 00:02:30,280
The Clara Barton of
the indigestion set.
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Nancy am nursing
wife, that's who I am.
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Well go head, go on Charlie,
if you want to do it go ahead.
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But if you get
upset tonight, don't
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call me, call the Red Cross.
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Wouldn't do me any good if
the Red Cross came, you wouldn't
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let me eat their donuts.
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It's that I don't want
you to get fat, so--
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Ah, you kids eating
your ice cream.
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00:02:49,908 --> 00:02:51,345
How about a hand of
pinochle, Charlie?
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Love it Danny.
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No I don't think
he should play.
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Why, pinochle is fattening?
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No, Danny, but you
know how excited Charley
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00:02:59,875 --> 00:03:00,832
gets when he plays cards.
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It's not good for him!
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00:03:02,356 --> 00:03:04,836
Starts twitching, he
gets palpitations,
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00:03:04,967 --> 00:03:08,362
he breaks out in a rash,
and his eyeballs pop out!
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00:03:08,492 --> 00:03:09,711
And that's when he's
winning, you should
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00:03:09,841 --> 00:03:12,322
see him when he's losing.
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Oh come on.
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No Danny, listen,
I'm not kidding.
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You know I know
this guy, I've been
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married to him for 10 years.
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10 glorious years.
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From the moment she carried
me across the threshold.
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Well listen honey, I
think we'd better be going.
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Hey Kathy, we're leaving.
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KATHY: Oh
DANNY: Why so soon?
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KATHY: Your leaving so soon.
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Well listen, the little
one's got an early morning
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appointment, and I know what
he's like when he doesn't
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get that eight hour sleep.
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It's so hard for me to
fall asleep Mommy, you
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always rock my cradle too fast.
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Get your coat.
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I'll get it, I'll get it.
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Sorry you're leaving so soon.
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00:03:45,573 --> 00:03:48,663
Hey, Charl, got a new coat huh?
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Yeah, I bought it last week.
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Nice looking,
where did you get it?
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Um, where?
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Yeah, where did you buy it?
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Well, um--
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Charlie, you-- you
bought a new coat, right?
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00:04:01,937 --> 00:04:03,199
Where did you buy it?
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00:04:03,330 --> 00:04:05,723
I bought it for
him at Frederick's.
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00:04:05,854 --> 00:04:07,638
Danny never lets me
buy anything for him.
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00:04:07,769 --> 00:04:09,423
He won't even let me
stand outside the store
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00:04:09,553 --> 00:04:11,076
window and point!
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00:04:11,207 --> 00:04:14,819
Not after what you did to
me at Miami Beach, I won't.
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00:04:14,950 --> 00:04:16,343
Well what happened
in Miami Beach?
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I let her shop for me.
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Bought me Bermuda shorts.
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00:04:20,911 --> 00:04:22,130
Well what's wrong
with Bermuda shorts?
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00:04:22,262 --> 00:04:23,872
I think men are
adorable in them.
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Purple velvet?
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We walked down the beach--
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I got more whistles
than she did!
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And she was wearing a bikini.
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That's because you have
such darling dimples.
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Oh never mind
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Listen I hate to break this
up kids, but we have to go.
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Kathy that was a lovely
dinner, thank you.
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00:04:44,066 --> 00:04:45,502
Goodnight, Danny.
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00:04:45,633 --> 00:04:47,461
Oh-- Oh-- Oh, wait a
minute, I'm out of cigars.
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00:04:47,591 --> 00:04:49,550
Hey Dan, can I mooch
one for the walk home?
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00:04:49,680 --> 00:04:51,291
Can I mooch a cigar please?
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00:04:51,421 --> 00:04:52,248
Oh that's swell, thank you--
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What are you doing?
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00:04:53,597 --> 00:04:54,555
It wouldn't hurt
you for change
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00:04:54,685 --> 00:04:55,991
to walk home without a cigar.
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00:04:56,121 --> 00:04:57,732
I won't be able to get
one until I get home.
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00:04:57,862 --> 00:05:01,126
Oh, what a tragedy, we live
all the way around the corner!
134
00:05:01,257 --> 00:05:02,650
Look honey, if you didn't
have a little cigar
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00:05:02,780 --> 00:05:04,608
stuck in your mouth,
you might accidentally
136
00:05:04,739 --> 00:05:05,957
inhale some fresh air.
137
00:05:06,088 --> 00:05:08,003
So come on, forget it, come on.
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00:05:08,133 --> 00:05:09,831
Wait a minute,
wait a minute, Bunny!
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00:05:09,961 --> 00:05:11,659
Now look, we're gonna get
something straightened out,
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00:05:11,789 --> 00:05:14,357
and we're gonna get it
straightened out here and now!
141
00:05:14,488 --> 00:05:16,185
You think you're going to stop
me from smoking my cigars?
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00:05:16,316 --> 00:05:17,534
Yes.
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00:05:17,665 --> 00:05:18,753
We got that straightened
out, goodnight.
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00:05:23,975 --> 00:05:25,063
What book you reading Russ?
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00:05:25,194 --> 00:05:26,369
The "Taming of the Shrew"
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How is it?
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Long.
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00:05:31,156 --> 00:05:32,027
What's a shrew?
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00:05:32,157 --> 00:05:33,420
A Dame
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Russell.
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I'm sorry.
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Honey, a shrew is
a domineering woman.
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Bosses a man around,
runs his whole life,
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tells him what to do
and when to do it.
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That's a shrew.
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00:05:44,779 --> 00:05:47,782
Oh, that's what I want
to be when I grow up.
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00:05:47,912 --> 00:05:49,261
A shrew?
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00:05:49,392 --> 00:05:50,611
If you don't
get off to school,
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00:05:50,741 --> 00:05:52,177
you'll be a dumbbell
when you grow up.
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00:05:52,308 --> 00:05:53,222
Now hurry up, you'll be late.
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You to Russ.
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Be good at school
now kids, hear?
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RUSSELL: I will dad.
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Rusty pick up my books!
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Pick them up yourself!
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00:06:05,582 --> 00:06:10,544
I guess you need a lot of
practice to be a good shrew.
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00:06:10,674 --> 00:06:12,328
We've got lots
of time for that.
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Bye mom, bye dad.
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Bye bye.
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That kid says
the cutest things.
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Hey-- that's it!
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That's what?
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"The Taming of the Shrew,"
you remember what it was about.
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This mild mannered fellow who--
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who cured his bossy
wife by acting tough?
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So?
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00:06:33,262 --> 00:06:34,784
Well it's kind of
bugging me the way Charley
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lets Bunny boss him around.
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Charlie do this,
Charlie do that.
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Don't eat that, eat that.
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Don't drink this.
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Come on let's go home.
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Picks his clothes and all that.
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00:06:42,097 --> 00:06:43,838
Why don't we borrow the
plot from Shakespeare
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00:06:43,968 --> 00:06:45,230
and get Charlie to fight back.
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00:06:45,361 --> 00:06:47,102
Charlie fight back at Bunny?
187
00:06:47,232 --> 00:06:49,234
Oh, Danny you're dreaming.
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00:06:49,365 --> 00:06:50,975
If I give that
guy a pep talk, I
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00:06:51,106 --> 00:06:53,804
guarantee you, he'll stand right
up with his shoulders squared,
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00:06:53,935 --> 00:06:54,718
look her right in the eye--
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And faint.
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00:07:00,028 --> 00:07:02,204
You're right.
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00:07:02,334 --> 00:07:04,075
Sure would like to help
the little guy though.
194
00:07:04,206 --> 00:07:05,947
Oh, now, Danny leave them alone.
195
00:07:06,077 --> 00:07:07,296
They've been
married for 10 years
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00:07:07,427 --> 00:07:10,299
and nothing's going
to change them now.
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00:07:10,430 --> 00:07:12,170
Hey I got an idea.
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00:07:12,301 --> 00:07:14,085
Why don't I talk to Bunny?
199
00:07:14,216 --> 00:07:18,350
I mean-- tell her that Charlie
gets these indigestion attacks
200
00:07:18,481 --> 00:07:19,874
only when he's aggravated.
201
00:07:20,004 --> 00:07:22,529
And 2 to 1, she's the one
who's aggravating him.
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00:07:22,659 --> 00:07:23,486
I've got a better idea.
203
00:07:23,617 --> 00:07:24,400
What?
204
00:07:24,531 --> 00:07:28,056
Mind your own business.
205
00:07:28,186 --> 00:07:29,710
Oh, I'm telling you.
206
00:07:29,840 --> 00:07:31,842
You know you just told me
that, you just alerted me.
207
00:07:31,973 --> 00:07:34,192
What is it with a wife,
a husband, I mean--
208
00:07:34,323 --> 00:07:36,717
It's like the father said,
behind every successful man
209
00:07:36,847 --> 00:07:39,459
there's a woman who
thinks he's an idiot.
210
00:07:39,589 --> 00:07:42,505
Poor persecuted thing,
I feel so sorry for you.
211
00:07:42,636 --> 00:07:43,854
Look honey,
they're our friends,
212
00:07:43,985 --> 00:07:45,029
and friends should
their friends.
213
00:07:45,159 --> 00:07:46,378
The the best way
to keep friends
214
00:07:46,509 --> 00:07:48,032
is to leave friends alone!
215
00:07:48,163 --> 00:07:49,381
Now Danny, please
don't interfere
216
00:07:49,512 --> 00:07:50,861
in other people's lives.
217
00:07:50,992 --> 00:07:52,733
I never interfere in
other people's lives.
218
00:07:52,863 --> 00:07:53,777
I've never done that!
219
00:07:53,908 --> 00:07:55,213
I never interfere.
220
00:07:55,344 --> 00:07:56,301
As long as I've lived
I have never interfered
221
00:07:56,432 --> 00:07:57,825
in other people's lives.
222
00:07:57,955 --> 00:07:59,479
And every time I did they
were grateful for it!
223
00:08:02,264 --> 00:08:06,181
Sure, just the way
Bert and Janet were.
224
00:08:06,311 --> 00:08:07,225
Bert and Janet?
225
00:08:07,356 --> 00:08:08,923
Yes, Bert and Janet Morgan.
226
00:08:09,053 --> 00:08:11,055
Oh, you stepped in
there and patched up
227
00:08:11,186 --> 00:08:14,319
their little domestic
troubles, didn't you?
228
00:08:14,450 --> 00:08:17,453
Oh boy, did you just
stick your pretty toes
229
00:08:17,584 --> 00:08:19,629
right in your beautiful
mouth that time!
230
00:08:19,760 --> 00:08:22,153
Oh, I'm so glad you picked
that for a for instance.
231
00:08:22,284 --> 00:08:24,329
It so happens, I saw Bert
and speaked the other day
232
00:08:24,460 --> 00:08:26,506
and he said he and Janet are
getting along just great.
233
00:08:26,636 --> 00:08:28,464
Of course, now he's
married to Shirley.
234
00:08:36,820 --> 00:08:39,606
Can't help it if they
didn't take my advice.
235
00:08:39,736 --> 00:08:42,957
Danny please, do me a
personal favor and-- and just
236
00:08:43,087 --> 00:08:44,393
leave them alone.
237
00:08:44,524 --> 00:08:47,831
Please don't rock the
boat, don't make waves!
238
00:08:47,962 --> 00:08:48,702
Just one little ripple.
239
00:08:48,832 --> 00:08:51,226
Not even a bubble.
240
00:08:51,356 --> 00:08:52,140
OK.
241
00:08:52,270 --> 00:08:54,359
Not just OK, promise.
242
00:08:54,490 --> 00:08:55,665
All right I promise.
243
00:08:55,796 --> 00:08:57,188
Solemn promise.
244
00:08:57,319 --> 00:09:00,409
All right, solemn promise.
245
00:09:00,540 --> 00:09:02,803
And I tell you Bunny,
you're the reason he
246
00:09:02,933 --> 00:09:05,501
gets those indigestion attacks!
247
00:09:05,632 --> 00:09:06,850
You aggravate him.
248
00:09:06,981 --> 00:09:08,504
He never gets them
unless he's aggravated
249
00:09:08,635 --> 00:09:10,245
and you aggravate him.
250
00:09:10,375 --> 00:09:12,639
But Danny, I love him, I was
only trying to protect him.
251
00:09:12,769 --> 00:09:14,728
Sweetheart, you're
overprotecting him.
252
00:09:14,858 --> 00:09:16,468
You're smothering the guy.
253
00:09:16,599 --> 00:09:20,690
You're absolutely positively
destroying his masculine pride.
254
00:09:20,821 --> 00:09:21,604
I am?
255
00:09:21,735 --> 00:09:22,692
Yes you am.
256
00:09:28,611 --> 00:09:31,266
Gee Danny, is that what it
seems like to an outsider.
257
00:09:31,396 --> 00:09:32,572
I'm afraid so dear.
258
00:09:38,490 --> 00:09:39,970
Gee Danny, I--
259
00:09:40,101 --> 00:09:42,233
I really didn't mean it
to come out like that.
260
00:09:42,364 --> 00:09:43,844
I know
261
00:09:43,974 --> 00:09:45,062
Well it's-- it's just that
I worry about him Danny.
262
00:09:45,193 --> 00:09:46,411
Of course
263
00:09:46,542 --> 00:09:47,369
Well you know-- you
know how he pushes
264
00:09:47,499 --> 00:09:48,849
himself and drives himself.
265
00:09:48,979 --> 00:09:50,154
Everything he does, he overdoes.
266
00:09:50,285 --> 00:09:51,765
I Know
267
00:09:51,895 --> 00:09:54,855
And as far as taking
care of himself, well jeez,
268
00:09:54,985 --> 00:09:56,596
he's like a little boy.
269
00:09:56,726 --> 00:09:59,163
And that's when I start
giving the orders,
270
00:09:59,294 --> 00:10:02,776
telling him to watch his diet
and then-- and how much to rest
271
00:10:02,906 --> 00:10:04,386
and, all the rest of it.
272
00:10:04,516 --> 00:10:05,256
That's it, that's it.
273
00:10:05,387 --> 00:10:06,997
Well Danny, I really--
274
00:10:07,128 --> 00:10:08,216
I wouldn't do
anything in the world
275
00:10:08,346 --> 00:10:09,304
if I thought I was hurting him.
276
00:10:09,434 --> 00:10:10,610
Bunny listen to
me, I know that,
277
00:10:10,740 --> 00:10:11,872
but you just hit it
just now when you
278
00:10:12,002 --> 00:10:13,351
said he's like a little boy.
279
00:10:13,482 --> 00:10:15,136
That's what's the matter!
280
00:10:15,266 --> 00:10:17,225
You treat him like a little boy,
so he think he's a little boy.
281
00:10:17,355 --> 00:10:19,401
You've got to treat
him like a man.
282
00:10:19,531 --> 00:10:24,101
Make him feel he is a man,
the King of his castle.
283
00:10:24,232 --> 00:10:26,321
You really think that
would make him happy?
284
00:10:26,451 --> 00:10:28,889
You just try it and he'll
never have those indigestion
285
00:10:29,019 --> 00:10:29,759
attacks anymore.
286
00:10:29,890 --> 00:10:31,108
You just try it.
287
00:10:31,239 --> 00:10:33,502
All right Danny, I'll try.
288
00:10:33,633 --> 00:10:36,157
Because I-- I really love
that little character,
289
00:10:36,287 --> 00:10:37,985
and there isn't
anything in the world I
290
00:10:38,115 --> 00:10:39,203
wouldn't do to make him happy.
291
00:10:39,334 --> 00:10:41,728
I know that too.
292
00:10:41,858 --> 00:10:43,251
Hey, Danny, hi!
293
00:10:43,381 --> 00:10:44,600
Charlie you're back!
294
00:10:50,911 --> 00:10:54,044
You-- you didn't
want me to come back?
295
00:10:54,175 --> 00:10:56,177
Of course I wanted
you to come back.
296
00:10:56,307 --> 00:10:57,700
Be careful, you'll
bust the eggs.
297
00:10:57,831 --> 00:11:00,268
Oh, well you shouldn't
have gone shopping
298
00:11:00,398 --> 00:11:01,791
in the first place, why--
299
00:11:01,922 --> 00:11:04,402
why grocery shopping
is a woman's job, and--
300
00:11:04,533 --> 00:11:07,971
and Charlie, you're a man.
301
00:11:08,102 --> 00:11:08,972
Yeah, yeah.
302
00:11:12,149 --> 00:11:13,237
Anyway darling, I'm--
303
00:11:13,368 --> 00:11:14,456
I'm glad you're back.
304
00:11:14,586 --> 00:11:15,762
Now you may not
be so glad when you
305
00:11:15,892 --> 00:11:17,415
find out I forgot the salami.
306
00:11:17,546 --> 00:11:21,550
Oh, darn the old salami.
307
00:11:21,681 --> 00:11:24,205
oh gee, Charlie, I love you.
308
00:11:24,335 --> 00:11:25,249
Kiss me.
309
00:11:31,168 --> 00:11:32,082
Kiss me.
310
00:11:36,130 --> 00:11:38,567
Gee, it feels so
funny from up here.
311
00:11:46,967 --> 00:11:48,795
Well I'll get some liqueurs.
312
00:11:48,925 --> 00:11:51,058
I'll get them sweetheart,
sit down sit down, sit down.
313
00:11:51,188 --> 00:11:53,234
Kathy, there's one
thing about your dinners,
314
00:11:53,364 --> 00:11:54,931
you never strikeout.
315
00:11:55,062 --> 00:11:58,413
Never a loser here, especially
that strawberry shortcake.
316
00:11:58,543 --> 00:12:02,286
Oh, Charlie, you are
my favorite dinner guest.
317
00:12:02,417 --> 00:12:03,635
Thank you
318
00:12:03,766 --> 00:12:06,073
Ah, would you
like some chocolate?
319
00:12:06,203 --> 00:12:08,205
Oh, no thank you.
320
00:12:08,336 --> 00:12:09,729
Bunny says too much--
321
00:12:09,859 --> 00:12:11,295
Oh, Darling it's not up
to Bunny, it's up to you.
322
00:12:16,431 --> 00:12:18,172
Well, I'll take
a green pill later.
323
00:12:20,391 --> 00:12:21,218
Bunny?
324
00:12:21,349 --> 00:12:22,785
No-- no, thanks, yeah.
325
00:12:22,916 --> 00:12:24,961
Some brandy, Charlie?
326
00:12:25,092 --> 00:12:27,355
Um.
327
00:12:27,485 --> 00:12:28,704
Well, it's up to you dear.
328
00:12:28,835 --> 00:12:31,489
If you want one,
go ahead, take it.
329
00:12:31,620 --> 00:12:32,795
Uh, yeah, I'll--
330
00:12:32,926 --> 00:12:34,754
I'll-- I'll have
some brandy, yeah.
331
00:12:39,367 --> 00:12:41,717
I have a feeling
somebody's been making waves.
332
00:12:44,546 --> 00:12:47,592
Well if somebody has,
we're sailing very smoothly.
333
00:12:50,595 --> 00:12:52,206
Hey uh, Carlo?
334
00:12:52,336 --> 00:12:53,773
Thank you Dan.
335
00:12:53,903 --> 00:12:54,730
How about you, Bunny,
a little creme de menthe?
336
00:12:54,861 --> 00:12:55,557
No, no, no.
Thanks, Dan.
337
00:12:55,687 --> 00:12:56,950
No, really?
338
00:12:57,080 --> 00:12:59,213
Boy is my liver
going to be surprised.
339
00:13:08,135 --> 00:13:09,789
Long time, no see, eh Mac?
340
00:13:19,233 --> 00:13:20,451
Glad you enjoyed that.
341
00:13:20,582 --> 00:13:21,626
Say, how would you
like a cigar Charley?
342
00:13:28,111 --> 00:13:30,461
Boy I-- I hope I can
remember this dream when
343
00:13:30,592 --> 00:13:32,986
I wake up in the morning so I--
344
00:13:33,116 --> 00:13:35,118
so I can tell my
friends about it.
345
00:13:35,249 --> 00:13:36,163
Here let me--
346
00:13:36,293 --> 00:13:37,729
let me light it for you honey.
347
00:13:37,860 --> 00:13:39,340
No, no, no-- you
better not light it,
348
00:13:39,470 --> 00:13:42,386
because if this is a dream,
I shouldn't smoke in bed.
349
00:13:47,522 --> 00:13:50,699
I, um I-- I-- think, uh--
350
00:13:50,830 --> 00:13:52,657
I think I'll have
some-- some more
351
00:13:52,788 --> 00:13:54,659
of that strawberry
shortcake right now, huh?
352
00:13:54,790 --> 00:13:55,878
Now?
353
00:13:56,009 --> 00:13:58,185
On top of the cigar
and the brandy?
354
00:13:58,315 --> 00:13:59,751
Well-- well why not Kathy?
355
00:13:59,882 --> 00:14:02,493
I mean if-- if Charley
wants it, he should have it.
356
00:14:02,624 --> 00:14:04,539
Well, all right.
357
00:14:04,669 --> 00:14:05,627
I better make some fresh coffee.
358
00:14:05,757 --> 00:14:06,497
Oh well, I'll--
359
00:14:06,628 --> 00:14:07,847
I'll help you Kathy.
360
00:14:10,632 --> 00:14:14,114
Charley, Charley,
how did you ever do it?
361
00:14:14,244 --> 00:14:15,332
I didn't--
362
00:14:15,463 --> 00:14:16,638
I didn't do nothing.
363
00:14:16,768 --> 00:14:18,335
I didn't do nothing!
364
00:14:18,466 --> 00:14:19,336
She flipped!
365
00:14:22,513 --> 00:14:25,255
She's sick, oh she's sick, huh?
366
00:14:25,386 --> 00:14:27,127
She's not sick, what
makes you say that?
367
00:14:27,257 --> 00:14:29,694
By god, what with all the
hugging, and the kissing.
368
00:14:29,825 --> 00:14:31,479
And the, what do
you want Charlie?
369
00:14:31,609 --> 00:14:32,872
And, what do you think Charlie?
370
00:14:33,002 --> 00:14:35,352
You don't think she flipped?
371
00:14:35,483 --> 00:14:37,398
If she's flipped,
she's flipped for you.
372
00:14:37,528 --> 00:14:38,442
Huh?
373
00:14:38,573 --> 00:14:40,357
Don't you see, Charlie?
374
00:14:40,488 --> 00:14:42,707
She's just getting
used to the idea
375
00:14:42,838 --> 00:14:46,842
that you're the
boss of the house.
376
00:14:46,973 --> 00:14:48,539
Well now if I can
just get used to it
377
00:14:48,670 --> 00:14:50,933
we'd make a wonderful couple.
378
00:14:51,064 --> 00:14:51,978
You will, you will.
379
00:14:55,415 --> 00:14:57,418
Hey Charlie, listen,
I want you to hear this!
380
00:14:57,548 --> 00:14:59,420
I think it'll make a
great middle line number.
381
00:14:59,550 --> 00:15:01,161
Listen-- listen to this, listen.
382
00:15:01,291 --> 00:15:08,037
[music playing]
383
00:15:08,168 --> 00:15:13,521
[SINGING] I want to be
happy, but I won't be happy,
384
00:15:13,651 --> 00:15:15,827
till I make you happy too.
385
00:15:18,874 --> 00:15:24,314
Life should be worth living
when you are [inaudible] given.
386
00:15:24,445 --> 00:15:27,361
Why don't I give some to you?
387
00:15:29,972 --> 00:15:35,717
When skies are gray
and you are blue,
388
00:15:35,847 --> 00:15:40,026
I'll bring the sunshine to you.
389
00:15:40,156 --> 00:15:46,771
Oh, I want to be happy,
but I won't be , happy
390
00:15:46,902 --> 00:15:51,385
till I make you happy too.
391
00:15:51,515 --> 00:15:57,304
Oh, when skies are gray
and you say you are blue,
392
00:15:57,434 --> 00:16:03,745
I'll bring the sunshine to you.
393
00:16:03,875 --> 00:16:09,185
Want to be happy,
but I won't be happy,
394
00:16:09,316 --> 00:16:11,840
till I make you happy too.
395
00:16:14,451 --> 00:16:15,583
How about that Charley, huh?
396
00:16:19,021 --> 00:16:20,849
Huh, you good?
397
00:16:20,980 --> 00:16:22,285
How you doing pal?
398
00:16:22,416 --> 00:16:23,243
Charley?
399
00:16:23,373 --> 00:16:24,113
Charley?
400
00:16:24,244 --> 00:16:25,071
Oh, hiya Danny.
401
00:16:25,201 --> 00:16:27,290
Hiya Danny?
402
00:16:27,421 --> 00:16:29,901
I just sang a whole song
for you, what do you mean--
403
00:16:30,032 --> 00:16:31,077
what's the-- what's
wrong with you?
404
00:16:31,207 --> 00:16:32,600
I didn't-- I didn't--
405
00:16:32,730 --> 00:16:33,818
Oh Danny please, don't
bother me with the songs,
406
00:16:33,949 --> 00:16:35,429
I got a lot of troubles at home.
407
00:16:35,559 --> 00:16:36,778
What troubles at home?
What's the matter?
408
00:16:36,908 --> 00:16:38,258
Weird!
409
00:16:38,388 --> 00:16:39,694
The whole thing is weird.
DANNY: What's weird?
410
00:16:39,824 --> 00:16:41,000
You know what my wife
said to me last night?
411
00:16:41,130 --> 00:16:42,262
No what?
412
00:16:42,392 --> 00:16:44,307
She said, I hear
the boys are going
413
00:16:44,438 --> 00:16:46,657
to play poker tonight
at the Friars Club,
414
00:16:46,788 --> 00:16:49,008
I guess you're planning to go?
415
00:16:49,138 --> 00:16:51,967
So I said, if it's all
right with you Darling.
416
00:16:52,098 --> 00:16:53,273
You know what she said?
417
00:16:53,403 --> 00:16:54,752
No what'd she say?
418
00:16:54,883 --> 00:16:55,884
You won't believe it
419
00:16:56,015 --> 00:16:56,841
DANNY: What'd she say?
420
00:16:56,972 --> 00:16:58,278
It's the weirdest thing.
421
00:16:58,408 --> 00:16:59,757
What'd she say?
422
00:16:59,888 --> 00:17:01,063
She said have a good time.
423
00:17:05,459 --> 00:17:06,851
That's not weird,
Charley, that's wonderful.
424
00:17:06,982 --> 00:17:08,288
That's wonderful?
425
00:17:08,417 --> 00:17:09,723
It ain't only that, I
mean it ain't only that.
426
00:17:09,854 --> 00:17:12,291
She's driving me crazy
with them cigar butts!
427
00:17:12,422 --> 00:17:13,510
What about?
428
00:17:13,641 --> 00:17:14,511
She don't complain
about me leaving
429
00:17:14,642 --> 00:17:15,772
them around anymore, you know.
430
00:17:15,904 --> 00:17:17,252
Before it used to
be, I just left
431
00:17:17,384 --> 00:17:18,950
one cigar butt-- big thing!
432
00:17:19,080 --> 00:17:21,083
But now, weird,
weird I tell you!
433
00:17:21,214 --> 00:17:25,653
I don't like it, them cigar
butts, they bother me.
434
00:17:25,782 --> 00:17:26,522
Hello?
435
00:17:26,654 --> 00:17:27,481
Yeah?
436
00:17:27,611 --> 00:17:29,961
Oh hello angel puss.
437
00:17:30,092 --> 00:17:31,746
Yes, darling.
438
00:17:31,876 --> 00:17:32,747
Just a minute sweetheart.
439
00:17:32,877 --> 00:17:33,791
It's my wife.
440
00:17:36,664 --> 00:17:38,100
I didn't think
it was the plumber.
441
00:17:40,711 --> 00:17:41,495
Huh?
442
00:17:41,625 --> 00:17:42,409
What dear?
443
00:17:42,539 --> 00:17:44,106
About our vacation?
444
00:17:44,237 --> 00:17:46,587
Where we-- well, you-- you
always do the planning Bunny.
445
00:17:46,717 --> 00:17:48,589
I mean, you're the
one who always--
446
00:17:48,719 --> 00:17:51,548
yeah but-- you want--
447
00:17:51,679 --> 00:17:52,854
Yeah?
448
00:17:52,984 --> 00:17:54,073
Uh huh?
449
00:17:54,203 --> 00:17:55,552
Uh huh?
450
00:17:55,683 --> 00:17:58,251
I will I will help you.
451
00:17:58,381 --> 00:18:00,557
I'll-- I'll work on it honey.
452
00:18:00,688 --> 00:18:01,602
Goodbye dear.
453
00:18:07,347 --> 00:18:10,219
There is a witch doctor
in here somewhere.
454
00:18:10,350 --> 00:18:11,177
What?
455
00:18:11,307 --> 00:18:12,178
This is the weirdest yet!
456
00:18:12,308 --> 00:18:13,962
What's weird?
457
00:18:14,093 --> 00:18:15,964
She wants me to decide where
we're going for our vacation!
458
00:18:16,095 --> 00:18:17,357
So decide!
459
00:18:17,487 --> 00:18:19,141
Yeah, but she never
let me decide before!
460
00:18:19,272 --> 00:18:22,884
Charley, this is an entirely
new regime now, you understand?
461
00:18:23,014 --> 00:18:25,321
Bunny realizes you are the boss!
462
00:18:25,452 --> 00:18:26,670
I'm-- I'm the boss?
463
00:18:26,801 --> 00:18:28,281
Of course you're the boss!
464
00:18:28,411 --> 00:18:29,630
You should be happy about it.
465
00:18:29,760 --> 00:18:30,979
Well I-- I am happy--
466
00:18:31,110 --> 00:18:32,111
- Be real happy.
- I mean, I'm--
467
00:18:32,241 --> 00:18:33,590
I'm--
Show me how happy.
468
00:18:33,721 --> 00:18:34,678
I'm happy!
469
00:18:34,809 --> 00:18:36,027
Real happy!
470
00:18:36,158 --> 00:18:37,507
I'm the happiest
man in the world!
471
00:18:37,638 --> 00:18:38,508
Oh my stomach--
472
00:18:41,381 --> 00:18:44,035
So, well, when you phoned
him Nancy, I brought him here.
473
00:18:44,166 --> 00:18:45,341
Well is-- is he all right now?
474
00:18:45,472 --> 00:18:46,603
Oh, he's just fine.
475
00:18:46,734 --> 00:18:47,865
He's been resting
for over an Hour.
476
00:18:47,996 --> 00:18:49,171
Yeah he's great, he's fine.
477
00:18:49,302 --> 00:18:50,607
Well gee, I just
don't understand it.
478
00:18:50,738 --> 00:18:52,783
I mean, why should he
have an attack now?
479
00:18:52,914 --> 00:18:54,437
Danny, I did
everything you said.
480
00:18:54,568 --> 00:18:56,700
Bunny, you've been
wonderful, all right.
481
00:18:56,831 --> 00:18:58,876
Oh, so you're here.
482
00:18:59,007 --> 00:19:01,444
Oh, Charley, Darling,
are you all right?
483
00:19:01,575 --> 00:19:03,229
Yeah I'm-- I'm, I'm all right.
484
00:19:03,359 --> 00:19:04,708
Well listen Charley,
why don't you come
485
00:19:04,839 --> 00:19:05,927
home and rest in your own bed.
486
00:19:06,057 --> 00:19:07,363
And I'll leave the house.
487
00:19:07,494 --> 00:19:09,060
I'll-- I'll kind of go
out shopping, and you
488
00:19:09,191 --> 00:19:11,237
can have absolute quiet, OK?
489
00:19:11,367 --> 00:19:12,412
Going shopping, huh?
490
00:19:12,542 --> 00:19:13,369
Uh-huh
491
00:19:13,500 --> 00:19:14,892
Alone?
492
00:19:15,023 --> 00:19:17,025
Well, yes.
493
00:19:17,156 --> 00:19:20,376
Well uh, you're
not meeting anybody?
494
00:19:20,507 --> 00:19:22,422
Well no, who
would I be meeting?
495
00:19:22,552 --> 00:19:23,597
Uh-huh.
496
00:19:23,727 --> 00:19:25,947
Well if you're not
meeting anybody,
497
00:19:26,077 --> 00:19:27,992
why don't we go
shopping together?
498
00:19:28,123 --> 00:19:30,299
I thought you wanted to rest?
499
00:19:30,430 --> 00:19:32,736
I don't want to rest, I
want to go shopping with you.
500
00:19:32,867 --> 00:19:34,564
Well-- well,
whatever you say dear.
501
00:19:34,695 --> 00:19:35,696
You're the boss.
502
00:19:35,826 --> 00:19:36,566
I am?
503
00:19:36,697 --> 00:19:38,133
Uh-huh
504
00:19:38,264 --> 00:19:40,483
Well suppose I say, like,
we'll go downtown so you
505
00:19:40,614 --> 00:19:42,006
can pick out a new suit for me.
506
00:19:42,137 --> 00:19:43,965
Oh no, no, dear, I
wouldn't presume to do that.
507
00:19:44,095 --> 00:19:48,012
You're-- you're the man, you
should pick out your own suit.
508
00:19:48,143 --> 00:19:49,318
Any style, any color?
509
00:19:49,449 --> 00:19:50,493
You-- you don't care?
510
00:19:50,624 --> 00:19:52,800
No, no, I don't care.
511
00:19:52,930 --> 00:19:56,020
Why don't you say it!
512
00:19:56,151 --> 00:19:58,109
Say-- say-- say--
say-- say what?
513
00:19:58,240 --> 00:20:02,288
If you want a divorce,
be a man and say so!
514
00:20:02,418 --> 00:20:03,680
A divorce?
515
00:20:03,811 --> 00:20:05,160
You heard me, don't
beat around the bush!
516
00:20:05,291 --> 00:20:06,640
You don't love me, you
want to get rid of me!
517
00:20:06,770 --> 00:20:08,076
Charley, how can you say that?
518
00:20:08,207 --> 00:20:09,991
I can say that,
it's very easy.
519
00:20:10,121 --> 00:20:11,949
Ah, you don't know
what's been going on.
520
00:20:12,080 --> 00:20:14,561
Letting me do everything I
want, letting me say everything
521
00:20:14,691 --> 00:20:15,475
I want.
522
00:20:15,605 --> 00:20:17,564
Oh, very simple, why?
523
00:20:17,694 --> 00:20:18,826
Don't want me around anymore.
524
00:20:18,956 --> 00:20:20,741
The cream pies, the brandy--
525
00:20:20,871 --> 00:20:23,439
you know it's poison for
me, but did you say stop?
526
00:20:23,570 --> 00:20:25,006
No.
527
00:20:25,136 --> 00:20:28,314
You said go go, take
anything you want, Charley!
528
00:20:28,444 --> 00:20:30,185
Sure, you figured it'd
be a little time--
529
00:20:30,316 --> 00:20:31,099
poof!
530
00:20:31,230 --> 00:20:32,100
I'll be finished.
531
00:20:35,103 --> 00:20:36,235
Oh, Charley, for crying out--
532
00:20:36,365 --> 00:20:37,932
You keep your big
nose out of this!
533
00:20:41,152 --> 00:20:42,937
And then letting me
leave my cigar box around
534
00:20:43,067 --> 00:20:44,286
the house, huh?
535
00:20:44,417 --> 00:20:46,810
Oh, that was a very
clever move, sure.
536
00:20:46,941 --> 00:20:50,161
So his cigar box and my
cigar box would mingle?
537
00:20:50,292 --> 00:20:53,643
And like that, I'd never
suspect he was there, huh!
538
00:20:53,774 --> 00:20:54,514
Who Charley?
539
00:20:54,644 --> 00:20:55,428
Who?
540
00:20:55,558 --> 00:20:56,951
Him, that's who-- him.
541
00:20:57,081 --> 00:20:58,518
Who-- Who do you got lined
up for my replacement?
542
00:20:58,648 --> 00:20:59,954
Who's the--
543
00:21:00,084 --> 00:21:03,436
That's about enough out
of you, Charley Halper.
544
00:21:03,566 --> 00:21:04,959
Huh?
545
00:21:05,089 --> 00:21:07,701
Am I to understand that
you are saying that I
546
00:21:07,831 --> 00:21:09,485
don't love you
anymore, just because I
547
00:21:09,616 --> 00:21:11,095
stopped bossing you around?
548
00:21:11,226 --> 00:21:12,140
Well, I thought--
549
00:21:12,271 --> 00:21:14,838
Well stop thinking and listen!
550
00:21:14,969 --> 00:21:16,753
Yes ma'am.
551
00:21:16,884 --> 00:21:19,495
There is only one man
in the world that I love,
552
00:21:19,626 --> 00:21:20,627
and that is you.
553
00:21:20,757 --> 00:21:21,628
You understand?
554
00:21:21,758 --> 00:21:23,282
You and nobody else but you.
555
00:21:23,412 --> 00:21:24,457
You are the one I love.
556
00:21:24,587 --> 00:21:26,633
I love you!
557
00:21:26,763 --> 00:21:29,810
Even with a hole in my chest?
558
00:21:29,940 --> 00:21:32,813
And the very idea-- you have
a lot of nerve to even think
559
00:21:32,943 --> 00:21:34,162
that there was anybody else!
560
00:21:34,293 --> 00:21:35,119
Well--
561
00:21:35,250 --> 00:21:36,295
Now be quiet and listen!
562
00:21:36,425 --> 00:21:37,861
Yeah, yeah.
563
00:21:37,992 --> 00:21:39,515
That's the trouble, you've
been doing entirely too
564
00:21:39,646 --> 00:21:40,516
much talking lately.
565
00:21:40,647 --> 00:21:42,344
Yes I have, yes I have.
566
00:21:42,475 --> 00:21:43,824
And it's going to
stop, do you understand?
567
00:21:43,954 --> 00:21:45,216
Yeah, yeah.
Yeah.
568
00:21:45,347 --> 00:21:46,392
And another thing,
from here on in you're
569
00:21:46,522 --> 00:21:47,741
going to drink
what's good for you,
570
00:21:47,871 --> 00:21:49,133
you're going to eat
what's good for you,
571
00:21:49,264 --> 00:21:50,221
and you're going to
get your proper rest.
572
00:21:50,352 --> 00:21:51,571
Uh-huh
573
00:21:51,701 --> 00:21:52,485
And I'm going to
see to it that you do.
574
00:21:52,615 --> 00:21:53,399
Uh-huh, yeah.
Yeah--
575
00:21:53,529 --> 00:21:55,401
Now come on.
576
00:21:55,531 --> 00:21:58,142
Wait, wait, wait, wait-- wait
a minute, where are we going?
577
00:21:58,273 --> 00:22:00,275
To pick out a
new suit for you.
578
00:22:00,406 --> 00:22:03,060
And if you even dare
suggest a color,
579
00:22:03,191 --> 00:22:06,412
I will break every
bone in your body.
580
00:22:10,764 --> 00:22:11,634
She loves me.
581
00:22:19,947 --> 00:22:23,342
[music playing]
582
00:22:25,822 --> 00:22:34,048
[SINGING] May someone happy,
make just one someone happy,
583
00:22:34,178 --> 00:22:43,971
make just one heart the
heart you sing to One
584
00:22:44,101 --> 00:22:46,495
smile that cheers you.
585
00:22:46,626 --> 00:22:50,891
One face that lights
when it nears you.
586
00:22:51,021 --> 00:22:56,940
One girl, you're everything to.
587
00:23:00,466 --> 00:23:08,474
Fame, if you win it, comes
and goes in a minute.
588
00:23:08,604 --> 00:23:14,915
Where's the real stuff
in life to cling to?
589
00:23:17,526 --> 00:23:21,791
Love is the answer.
590
00:23:21,922 --> 00:23:26,100
Someone to love is the answer.
591
00:23:26,230 --> 00:23:33,455
Once you've found her,
build your world around her.
592
00:23:33,586 --> 00:23:41,942
Make someone happy,
one someone happy.
593
00:23:44,814 --> 00:23:53,823
And you will be happy too.
594
00:24:08,621 --> 00:24:12,059
Gee, Danny, you sang that like
it really came from the heart.
595
00:24:12,189 --> 00:24:15,932
It certainly did, because
I got a wonderful someone
596
00:24:16,063 --> 00:24:17,368
to be happy with.
597
00:24:17,499 --> 00:24:19,196
You Really mean that?
598
00:24:19,327 --> 00:24:22,373
What a silly question, I
wore your cockamamie Bermudas,
599
00:24:22,504 --> 00:24:23,244
didn't I?
600
00:24:23,374 --> 00:24:25,812
What more do you want?
42748
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