Would you like to inspect the original subtitles? These are the user uploaded subtitles that are being translated:
1
00:00:00,825 --> 00:00:02,124
No, no, no!
2
00:00:02,125 --> 00:00:03,290
I did not spend an entire day
doing laundry
3
00:00:03,291 --> 00:00:06,336
just to have it ruined
by one stupid sock!
4
00:00:06,337 --> 00:00:08,211
Tell me
where your friend is!
5
00:00:08,212 --> 00:00:10,252
Answer me,
you son of a bitch!
6
00:00:10,253 --> 00:00:10,775
Don't worry--
7
00:00:10,776 --> 00:00:12,608
she always swears
at the laundry.
8
00:00:12,609 --> 00:00:14,962
Now, what causes thunder?
9
00:00:14,963 --> 00:00:16,337
Oh, I know this one!
10
00:00:16,338 --> 00:00:18,420
Thunder happens
when two clouds
11
00:00:18,421 --> 00:00:20,545
bump into each other
super hard.
12
00:00:20,546 --> 00:00:23,629
Super... hard.
13
00:00:23,630 --> 00:00:24,920
Actually, Trip,
14
00:00:24,921 --> 00:00:26,337
thunder occurs
when lightning,
15
00:00:26,338 --> 00:00:28,045
which is a discharge
of electricity,
16
00:00:28,046 --> 00:00:29,795
shoots through the air,
causing vibrations.
17
00:00:29,796 --> 00:00:31,379
Good one, Mr. A.
18
00:00:31,380 --> 00:00:33,129
"Vibrations."
19
00:00:34,963 --> 00:00:36,170
Hey, Dad, after we're
finished studying,
20
00:00:36,171 --> 00:00:37,587
can Trip and I
go see a midnight movie?
21
00:00:37,588 --> 00:00:39,755
Sounds fun, but you have to ask
your Mom first.
22
00:00:41,055 --> 00:00:42,837
You know that
she can't be out till 2:00 a.m.
23
00:00:42,838 --> 00:00:44,045
on a school night.
24
00:00:44,046 --> 00:00:46,254
Why do you always make me
the bad cop?
25
00:00:46,255 --> 00:00:47,795
'Cause you're so good
at it.
Yeah.
26
00:00:47,796 --> 00:00:49,379
Spoiling fun.
27
00:00:49,380 --> 00:00:50,962
That's what attracted me
to the parenting business
28
00:00:50,963 --> 00:00:52,545
to begin with.
29
00:00:52,546 --> 00:00:56,212
Taylor, absolutely
no midnight movies.
30
00:00:56,213 --> 00:00:57,629
Don't worry, babe.
31
00:00:57,630 --> 00:00:59,254
We'll just see
a midnight movie earlier,
32
00:00:59,255 --> 00:01:00,254
at like 9:00.
33
00:01:00,255 --> 00:01:02,462
You are so smart.
34
00:01:06,588 --> 00:01:08,004
Uh, hey, guys.
35
00:01:08,005 --> 00:01:10,004
Hey, Dad.
Mr. A!
36
00:01:10,005 --> 00:01:11,087
Oh, I almost forgot.
37
00:01:11,088 --> 00:01:12,504
How am I supposed
to do the laundry
38
00:01:12,505 --> 00:01:13,629
without the laundry?
39
00:01:18,213 --> 00:01:20,630
Mm.
40
00:01:22,005 --> 00:01:24,462
Katie, can you come here
for a minute?
41
00:01:24,463 --> 00:01:26,795
What's up?
42
00:01:26,796 --> 00:01:28,005
Nothing.
43
00:01:38,630 --> 00:01:39,504
Katie!
44
00:01:39,505 --> 00:01:41,045
Ohh.
45
00:01:41,046 --> 00:01:42,420
What do you want, Greg?
46
00:01:42,421 --> 00:01:44,462
I want you to stay in this room
and never leave, ever.
47
00:01:44,463 --> 00:01:45,670
Does that mean
I stay here
48
00:01:45,671 --> 00:01:46,879
and you do
the grocery shopping?
49
00:01:46,880 --> 00:01:48,212
Is this some sort of trick
50
00:01:48,213 --> 00:01:49,587
to get almond butter
back in the house?
51
00:01:49,588 --> 00:01:50,546
Not falling for it.
52
00:01:53,546 --> 00:01:55,255
Want a back rub?
Yay!
53
00:01:56,546 --> 00:01:57,545
Mm.
54
00:01:57,546 --> 00:01:59,045
Wow.
55
00:01:59,046 --> 00:02:01,379
Your corneas
are so tight.
Mm.
56
00:02:05,005 --> 00:02:06,962
Oliver,
here's your laundry.
57
00:02:06,963 --> 00:02:08,920
I put anything you labeled
"dry clean only"
58
00:02:08,921 --> 00:02:10,337
in the washer
59
00:02:10,338 --> 00:02:13,046
because dry cleaning
is just a bunch of voodoo.
60
00:02:14,463 --> 00:02:16,420
Why are you taking down
all your stuff?
61
00:02:16,421 --> 00:02:18,254
Did the ghost of
Westport Douche Future
62
00:02:18,255 --> 00:02:19,420
pay you a visit?
63
00:02:19,421 --> 00:02:21,254
Gina is coming over
for the first time,
64
00:02:21,255 --> 00:02:23,254
and I don't want her to get
the wrong impression.
65
00:02:23,255 --> 00:02:24,337
If she sees all this,
she might think I'm a...
66
00:02:24,338 --> 00:02:26,504
Materialistic snob?
A preppy idiot?
67
00:02:26,505 --> 00:02:28,295
A pubescent Mr. Monopoly?
68
00:02:28,296 --> 00:02:30,295
Oliver, I'm landing shots
left and right here.
69
00:02:30,296 --> 00:02:31,379
Stand up for yourself.
70
00:02:31,380 --> 00:02:32,504
Mom, this is serious.
71
00:02:32,505 --> 00:02:33,879
Gina isn't from Westport.
72
00:02:33,880 --> 00:02:35,045
She's from South Brampton,
73
00:02:35,046 --> 00:02:37,170
so she's not
into the whole money thing.
74
00:02:37,171 --> 00:02:39,045
So you're telling me
75
00:02:39,046 --> 00:02:41,587
that you are willing to change
your entire personality
76
00:02:41,588 --> 00:02:42,462
for your new girlfriend?
77
00:02:42,463 --> 00:02:44,004
You're disappointed.
78
00:02:44,005 --> 00:02:45,545
You think I should be myself,
no matter what?
79
00:02:45,546 --> 00:02:46,670
Of course not.
80
00:02:46,671 --> 00:02:48,420
I love
that you're changing!
81
00:02:48,421 --> 00:02:49,920
Your personality
is terrible.
82
00:02:49,921 --> 00:02:52,212
Ladies and gentlemen,
my mom.
83
00:02:52,213 --> 00:02:55,629
No, I mean,
it is terrible.
84
00:02:55,630 --> 00:02:56,879
If I wasn't your mother,
I'd be like,
85
00:02:56,880 --> 00:02:57,920
"Who is your mother?"
86
00:03:04,505 --> 00:03:06,212
Neeeigh!
87
00:03:06,213 --> 00:03:09,504
{\an8}Ahhhhhh-
uuuuuuuuuuuuuuuunck!
88
00:03:09,505 --> 00:03:11,462
I made a T. rex noise.
89
00:03:11,463 --> 00:03:12,880
Be better, Franklin.
90
00:03:14,171 --> 00:03:15,587
Anna-Kat, you're never gonna
believe what just happened.
91
00:03:15,588 --> 00:03:16,837
Try me.
92
00:03:16,838 --> 00:03:18,129
{\an8}You know how
I've been trying
93
00:03:18,130 --> 00:03:19,420
{\an8}to teach your brother
that money isn't everything?
94
00:03:19,421 --> 00:03:21,587
{\an8}Well, I think he finally
learned his lesson,
95
00:03:21,588 --> 00:03:23,254
{\an8}thanks to
that new girlfriend of his.
96
00:03:23,255 --> 00:03:26,129
{\an8}A lot of windup
for very little payoff.
97
00:03:26,130 --> 00:03:27,837
{\an8}I can see
you're not the audience
98
00:03:27,838 --> 00:03:29,795
{\an8}for news about
Oliver's personal growth.
Nope.
99
00:03:29,796 --> 00:03:31,337
{\an8}Now, if you'll excuse us,
100
00:03:31,338 --> 00:03:32,795
{\an8}I have to teach Franklin
101
00:03:32,796 --> 00:03:34,545
{\an8}how to make pony noises
correctly.
102
00:03:34,546 --> 00:03:36,629
Mm.
103
00:03:36,630 --> 00:03:37,920
Can I go home yet?
104
00:03:37,921 --> 00:03:40,295
This playdate is over
when I say it's over.
105
00:03:40,296 --> 00:03:42,920
{\an8}Hey, great news--
106
00:03:42,921 --> 00:03:45,379
{\an8}Oliver is becoming
less of a materialistic jerk
107
00:03:45,380 --> 00:03:46,879
{\an8}because of
Gina Tuscadero.
108
00:03:46,880 --> 00:03:48,545
{\an8}Yeah, well,
I have terrible news.
109
00:03:48,546 --> 00:03:50,087
{\an8}I just got
a back rub from Trip,
110
00:03:50,088 --> 00:03:51,170
and it felt amazing.
111
00:03:51,171 --> 00:03:52,920
{\an8}Why did you let him
give you a back rub?
112
00:03:52,921 --> 00:03:54,504
{\an8}It was the only thing
I could do
113
00:03:54,505 --> 00:03:56,004
{\an8}to keep his hands
off Taylor.
114
00:03:56,005 --> 00:03:57,462
{\an8}Those two
are all over each other.
115
00:03:57,463 --> 00:03:58,545
{\an8}I didn't see anything.
116
00:03:58,546 --> 00:03:59,962
{\an8}That's because,
for some strange reason,
117
00:03:59,963 --> 00:04:01,337
they're never handsy
in front of you.
118
00:04:01,338 --> 00:04:02,545
{\an8}Oh...
119
00:04:02,546 --> 00:04:05,004
{\an8}That's because no one fears
the good cop.
120
00:04:05,005 --> 00:04:06,337
{\an8}You give them dessert
before dinner.
121
00:04:06,338 --> 00:04:07,962
{\an8}You do their homework
when they fall behind.
122
00:04:07,963 --> 00:04:11,045
{\an8}Taylor knows not to pull
that PDA stuff around me.
123
00:04:11,046 --> 00:04:13,712
{\an8}But with the good cop,
anything goes.
124
00:04:13,713 --> 00:04:15,420
I want to learn to be
a less likable parent.
125
00:04:15,421 --> 00:04:17,087
Teach me.
126
00:04:17,088 --> 00:04:19,545
Next time you see
Taylor and Trip's PDA,
127
00:04:19,546 --> 00:04:21,337
shut it down
with "The Look."
128
00:04:21,338 --> 00:04:22,171
What's "The Look"?
129
00:04:23,671 --> 00:04:24,754
Ooh, that's good.
130
00:04:24,755 --> 00:04:26,254
Shuts the kids down
every time.
131
00:04:26,255 --> 00:04:27,046
Give it a try.
132
00:04:28,921 --> 00:04:30,087
You holding in a fart,
Greg?
133
00:04:30,088 --> 00:04:31,212
No,
I'm trying to look mean.
134
00:04:31,213 --> 00:04:32,045
Well, try harder.
135
00:04:32,046 --> 00:04:33,379
Remember how angry you were
136
00:04:33,380 --> 00:04:35,754
when we walked into
that Abe Lincoln-themed diner
137
00:04:35,755 --> 00:04:37,838
and they sat us in
the John Wilkes Booth booth?
138
00:04:39,838 --> 00:04:41,254
There it is.
139
00:04:42,255 --> 00:04:43,713
That must be Gina.
140
00:04:45,171 --> 00:04:47,087
The girl who made our son
less of a tool
141
00:04:47,088 --> 00:04:48,295
and, through
her parents' restaurant,
142
00:04:48,296 --> 00:04:50,629
has unlimited access
to pizza.
143
00:04:50,630 --> 00:04:52,005
Pinch me!
I think I'm dreaming.
144
00:04:53,213 --> 00:04:56,087
Remember,
Gina is a regular girl.
145
00:04:56,088 --> 00:04:58,337
This is no time to stop
acting like yourselves.
146
00:04:59,921 --> 00:05:01,629
Hey, Gina.
Hey, Oliver.
147
00:05:01,630 --> 00:05:04,754
Wow.
Your house is so nice.
148
00:05:04,755 --> 00:05:06,170
Thanks.
149
00:05:06,171 --> 00:05:08,295
Just two good,
hardworking people,
150
00:05:08,296 --> 00:05:10,587
trying their best to provide
for their family.
151
00:05:10,588 --> 00:05:11,629
I'll sign the papers
152
00:05:11,630 --> 00:05:13,004
for their teen marriage
right now.
153
00:05:13,005 --> 00:05:15,629
You remember
my mom and dad.
154
00:05:15,630 --> 00:05:17,920
And my sister Taylor
and her boyfriend, Trip.
155
00:05:17,921 --> 00:05:19,962
And this is
my little sister Anna-Kat
156
00:05:19,963 --> 00:05:21,504
and her friend Franklin.
157
00:05:26,296 --> 00:05:28,837
Actually, Franklin and I
just made it official.
158
00:05:28,838 --> 00:05:30,212
We're an item now.
159
00:05:30,213 --> 00:05:31,420
What's an item?
160
00:05:31,421 --> 00:05:33,295
How I hooked this tuna,
I'll never know.
161
00:05:36,796 --> 00:05:37,921
Come on in.
162
00:05:40,213 --> 00:05:42,505
So, Gina...
163
00:05:43,838 --> 00:05:45,129
Oh, come on.
164
00:05:45,130 --> 00:05:46,670
These dishes are so nice.
165
00:05:46,671 --> 00:05:49,045
Thank you.
I got them from CVS.
166
00:05:49,046 --> 00:05:52,212
And this shirt's from Ross,
from the irregular bin.
167
00:05:52,213 --> 00:05:53,837
Well, you better not
tell anybody,
168
00:05:53,838 --> 00:05:55,379
or they'll kick you
out of Westport.
169
00:05:57,380 --> 00:05:59,879
Look at that--
Oliver fell for his mother.
170
00:05:59,880 --> 00:06:02,004
Yeah,
Westport's the worst.
171
00:06:02,005 --> 00:06:03,587
All people care about is
showing off how rich they are.
172
00:06:04,838 --> 00:06:06,587
Buenos días, Ottos!
173
00:06:06,588 --> 00:06:09,337
Check out what I just charged
to my black Amex.
174
00:06:09,338 --> 00:06:11,754
It is a custom-made,
Italian leather tote bag.
175
00:06:11,755 --> 00:06:13,879
Everyone,
form a line to feel.
176
00:06:13,880 --> 00:06:15,837
Who is this?
177
00:06:15,838 --> 00:06:17,629
I'm Cooper,
Oliver's best friend.
178
00:06:17,630 --> 00:06:19,504
Really?
179
00:06:19,505 --> 00:06:21,670
Cooper and I
hang out on occasion.
180
00:06:21,671 --> 00:06:22,670
All the time.
181
00:06:22,671 --> 00:06:24,045
Now, dude, let's go.
182
00:06:24,046 --> 00:06:25,379
There's a bocce tournament
at the club,
183
00:06:25,380 --> 00:06:27,588
and I have to swing by the house
to change into my whites.
184
00:06:28,921 --> 00:06:30,462
This is eggshell.
185
00:06:30,463 --> 00:06:31,670
Oh.
186
00:06:31,671 --> 00:06:33,754
Actually, Gina and I
are going mini-golfing.
187
00:06:33,755 --> 00:06:36,129
Not enough Purell
in the world, brotha.
188
00:06:36,130 --> 00:06:38,088
Has anyone ever described you
as "punchable"?
189
00:06:39,546 --> 00:06:41,045
Sorry, Coop.
190
00:06:41,046 --> 00:06:42,337
Gina and I
already made plans.
191
00:06:42,338 --> 00:06:44,170
You and I can go to the club
another time.
192
00:06:44,171 --> 00:06:45,462
Come on, Oliver,
193
00:06:45,463 --> 00:06:47,295
we gotta leave now
if we want to catch the bus.
194
00:06:47,296 --> 00:06:48,629
Don't worry about it.
I'll give you a ride.
195
00:06:48,630 --> 00:06:50,545
Did you not hear me?
196
00:06:50,546 --> 00:06:52,004
It's Bocce Day.
197
00:06:52,005 --> 00:06:53,713
Bocce!
198
00:06:58,046 --> 00:06:59,670
That girl's trouble,
Mrs. Otto.
199
00:06:59,671 --> 00:07:01,129
She's not like one of us.
200
00:07:02,630 --> 00:07:04,545
You don't have
any Fiji Water.
201
00:07:04,546 --> 00:07:06,837
I'll put that
on your shopping list.
202
00:07:06,838 --> 00:07:07,879
Cooper, the only reason
you're in this house
203
00:07:07,880 --> 00:07:09,045
is Oliver's here.
204
00:07:09,046 --> 00:07:11,004
So when he's not here,
205
00:07:11,005 --> 00:07:12,295
you're not here.
206
00:07:12,296 --> 00:07:13,130
¿Comprende?
207
00:07:21,921 --> 00:07:24,213
Smart--
age up the leather.
208
00:07:26,255 --> 00:07:27,921
I don't want to look like
new money.
209
00:07:30,213 --> 00:07:32,337
Oliver is becoming
a better person,
210
00:07:32,338 --> 00:07:33,795
and I might finally have
211
00:07:33,796 --> 00:07:35,504
his obnoxious
Richie Rich friend
212
00:07:35,505 --> 00:07:37,337
out of my life forever.
213
00:07:37,338 --> 00:07:40,045
The only way
this day could get better
214
00:07:40,046 --> 00:07:42,129
is if I found that--
215
00:07:42,130 --> 00:07:43,795
Move over,
birth of my children.
216
00:07:43,796 --> 00:07:45,879
This is officially
the best day of my life.
217
00:07:45,880 --> 00:07:47,045
Vacation's over, bitch.
218
00:07:53,421 --> 00:07:55,379
When lightning shoots
through the air,
219
00:07:55,380 --> 00:07:57,170
it causes vibrations
that we call "thunder."
220
00:07:57,171 --> 00:07:58,545
Now do you believe me?
221
00:07:59,796 --> 00:08:01,629
Way to double down
on a joke, Mr. A.
222
00:08:01,630 --> 00:08:04,670
So, Anna-Kat, how long have
you and Franklin been dating?
223
00:08:04,671 --> 00:08:06,045
You mean,
when did we first know
224
00:08:06,046 --> 00:08:07,545
we were madly in love?
Mm-hmm.
225
00:08:07,546 --> 00:08:09,212
That's
a great question.
226
00:08:09,213 --> 00:08:11,212
Sweetie,
when did we first know?
227
00:08:11,213 --> 00:08:12,795
I have an extra toe.
228
00:08:12,796 --> 00:08:14,295
Oh, Franklin.
229
00:08:14,296 --> 00:08:15,795
The things you say.
230
00:08:15,796 --> 00:08:18,045
This is a cumulus cloud.
231
00:08:18,046 --> 00:08:20,629
And this is
an altocumulus cloud.
232
00:08:20,630 --> 00:08:21,920
And this is...
233
00:08:21,921 --> 00:08:23,420
A bored housewife
closing her eyes.
234
00:08:23,421 --> 00:08:24,463
See ya.
235
00:08:29,421 --> 00:08:30,421
Taylor.
236
00:08:32,838 --> 00:08:34,670
Whoa!
Dad, are you okay?
237
00:08:34,671 --> 00:08:36,170
Is your IBS acting up?
238
00:08:36,171 --> 00:08:38,213
I'm fine.
Just focus on the program.
239
00:08:47,463 --> 00:08:49,504
Mr. A, I definitely think
something is wrong.
240
00:08:49,505 --> 00:08:51,462
My dog made the same face
you're making now,
241
00:08:51,463 --> 00:08:52,962
and later that day,
he died.
242
00:08:52,963 --> 00:08:54,670
We need to get you to a vet,
ASAP.
243
00:08:54,671 --> 00:08:56,379
Trip, the only thing
that's wrong with me
244
00:08:56,380 --> 00:08:57,504
is the fact that you two
245
00:08:57,505 --> 00:08:58,963
won't keep your hands
off each other!
246
00:09:00,213 --> 00:09:02,254
Dad, you're being so uncool
right now.
247
00:09:02,255 --> 00:09:03,670
I don't care.
248
00:09:03,671 --> 00:09:06,254
Taylor, your PDA
is completely unacceptable,
249
00:09:06,255 --> 00:09:07,837
and I will not have it
in this house anymore.
250
00:09:07,838 --> 00:09:08,880
Are we clear?
251
00:09:09,463 --> 00:09:10,505
Of course, sir.
252
00:09:12,046 --> 00:09:13,546
I should go.
253
00:09:16,338 --> 00:09:18,004
Trip and I like each other.
254
00:09:18,005 --> 00:09:19,754
We're just doing
what couples do.
255
00:09:19,755 --> 00:09:21,004
I expect mom to freak out,
256
00:09:21,005 --> 00:09:22,380
but I thought
you were cooler than that.
257
00:09:23,671 --> 00:09:25,420
I guess I was wrong.
258
00:09:25,421 --> 00:09:27,004
Move over, Bruce Willis.
259
00:09:27,005 --> 00:09:29,045
There's a new bad cop
on the force.
260
00:09:29,046 --> 00:09:31,213
Yippee-daba-doo,
mother-may-I.
261
00:09:32,505 --> 00:09:33,462
Is that right?
262
00:09:33,463 --> 00:09:34,879
No.
263
00:09:37,338 --> 00:09:38,795
Grand?
264
00:09:38,796 --> 00:09:41,295
More like a bland jeté,
Rachel.
Rachel's garbage.
265
00:09:41,296 --> 00:09:42,337
Hey, amigo.
266
00:09:42,338 --> 00:09:44,087
Dónde está you been?
267
00:09:44,088 --> 00:09:45,754
I gave you a call
yesterday.
Yeah.
268
00:09:45,755 --> 00:09:47,379
Conveniently,
when you knew I'd be
269
00:09:47,380 --> 00:09:49,170
at my grass court
tennis lesson.
270
00:09:49,171 --> 00:09:50,587
Why'd he say what the court
was made out of?
271
00:09:50,588 --> 00:09:52,254
It's one of those
Westport things.
272
00:09:52,255 --> 00:09:54,254
Hey, Oliver,
you live in Westport.
273
00:09:54,255 --> 00:09:55,504
Dude, what's your deal?
274
00:09:55,505 --> 00:09:56,795
You meet her,
275
00:09:56,796 --> 00:09:58,087
and suddenly you're acting
all not high and mighty.
276
00:09:58,088 --> 00:10:00,045
Cooper,
let's talk about this later.
No.
277
00:10:00,046 --> 00:10:01,337
I want
to talk about it now.
278
00:10:01,338 --> 00:10:02,504
If she doesn't want
to hang out with me, I--
279
00:10:02,505 --> 00:10:04,504
She never said that.
I didn't say it yet.
280
00:10:04,505 --> 00:10:06,254
See? She said it.
281
00:10:06,255 --> 00:10:07,920
She still hasn't
technically said it.
282
00:10:07,921 --> 00:10:10,171
I don't want
to hang out with you.
283
00:10:11,463 --> 00:10:13,170
Well, now she said it.
284
00:10:13,171 --> 00:10:14,421
Looks like you're gonna
have to choose.
285
00:10:15,713 --> 00:10:17,879
Is it me or her?
286
00:10:17,880 --> 00:10:18,920
Don't be like that.
287
00:10:18,921 --> 00:10:20,129
Oliver, let's go.
288
00:10:20,130 --> 00:10:22,462
It's high noon,
muchacho.
289
00:10:28,005 --> 00:10:29,463
I'll see you around,
Cooper.
290
00:10:30,588 --> 00:10:32,295
You get a girlfriend
and blow off your buddy--
291
00:10:32,296 --> 00:10:33,879
fine.
292
00:10:33,880 --> 00:10:35,545
Just remember,
before I took you under my wing,
293
00:10:35,546 --> 00:10:37,545
you were nothing!
294
00:10:37,546 --> 00:10:40,420
You wore seersucker in the Fall
like a friggin' townie!
295
00:10:43,838 --> 00:10:46,045
It's so cool
that you have a pig as a pet.
296
00:10:46,046 --> 00:10:48,379
Oh, yeah, I love him.
297
00:10:48,380 --> 00:10:50,795
Can't get enough
of this filthy guy.
298
00:10:54,671 --> 00:10:55,754
Hey, Mom.
Mm-hmm.
299
00:10:55,755 --> 00:10:57,420
I need some advice.
Sure.
300
00:10:57,421 --> 00:10:58,879
Stop wearing
your sister's jeans.
301
00:10:58,880 --> 00:11:00,296
Boom! Up top!
302
00:11:00,921 --> 00:11:01,920
Don't be mad.
303
00:11:01,921 --> 00:11:03,254
You give me a setup
like that,
304
00:11:03,255 --> 00:11:04,420
I'm gonna crush it.
305
00:11:04,421 --> 00:11:06,170
Cooper and Gina
don't get along,
306
00:11:06,171 --> 00:11:07,962
and they made me
choose sides.
Mm-hmm.
307
00:11:07,963 --> 00:11:08,962
I picked Gina,
308
00:11:08,963 --> 00:11:10,587
and now Cooper and I
aren't talking.
309
00:11:10,588 --> 00:11:12,045
What should I do?
Nothing.
310
00:11:12,046 --> 00:11:13,879
It's always
hos before bros.
311
00:11:13,880 --> 00:11:15,837
Isn't it
bros before hos?
312
00:11:15,838 --> 00:11:17,337
Hey, this is 2018.
313
00:11:17,338 --> 00:11:19,837
There has been real progress
in this country.
314
00:11:19,838 --> 00:11:21,545
Hos have come a long way.
315
00:11:21,546 --> 00:11:22,795
You guys ready to go?
316
00:11:22,796 --> 00:11:24,462
I'm dropping them off
at Gina's family's restaurant.
317
00:11:24,463 --> 00:11:25,962
The kids
will have dinner there.
318
00:11:25,963 --> 00:11:27,837
Mm.
Dad, you should come in
and grab a calzone.
319
00:11:27,838 --> 00:11:30,045
Wow. Normally, you ask me
to come to a rolling stop,
320
00:11:30,046 --> 00:11:31,712
and then you say,
"Thanks, Uber driver."
321
00:11:31,713 --> 00:11:33,088
He's joking.
322
00:11:33,755 --> 00:11:35,670
Hey, Franklin, why don't
you come with us, buddy?
323
00:11:35,671 --> 00:11:37,045
Your house is on the way.
324
00:11:37,046 --> 00:11:39,045
You're leaving
without saying goodbye?
325
00:11:39,046 --> 00:11:42,212
Seriously, Franklin,
what is happening to us?
326
00:11:42,213 --> 00:11:43,837
I wanted
to name my cat Mittens,
327
00:11:43,838 --> 00:11:45,504
but my mom
wouldn't let me.
328
00:11:45,505 --> 00:11:46,754
Now its name is Phillip.
329
00:11:46,755 --> 00:11:48,004
Wow.
330
00:11:48,005 --> 00:11:50,087
I think we should take
some time to cool off
331
00:11:50,088 --> 00:11:51,879
before we say something
we regret.
332
00:11:53,796 --> 00:11:55,045
I'll be in my room,
333
00:11:55,046 --> 00:11:57,130
listening to the sad song
from "Mulan."
334
00:12:01,088 --> 00:12:02,504
Looks like it's just
you and me for dinner,
335
00:12:02,505 --> 00:12:03,629
Hans Gruber.
336
00:12:05,296 --> 00:12:06,962
Hola, Mrs. Otto.
337
00:12:06,963 --> 00:12:08,170
Adiós, Cooper.
338
00:12:08,171 --> 00:12:09,379
Oliver's not here.
339
00:12:09,380 --> 00:12:11,045
Oh, I know.
I just saw him leave.
340
00:12:11,046 --> 00:12:12,420
I actually came here
to see you.
341
00:12:12,421 --> 00:12:13,795
Me?
Yeah.
342
00:12:13,796 --> 00:12:15,879
It's bad enough
I lose my best friend,
343
00:12:15,880 --> 00:12:17,380
but that means
I also lose you.
344
00:12:19,796 --> 00:12:20,879
Me?
345
00:12:20,880 --> 00:12:22,170
Yeah.
346
00:12:22,171 --> 00:12:23,879
I mean, my parents
travel all the time,
347
00:12:23,880 --> 00:12:25,087
so you're, like,
the only one
348
00:12:25,088 --> 00:12:26,837
who's looking out
for good ole Cooper B.
349
00:12:26,838 --> 00:12:28,837
But all I do
is yell at you.
350
00:12:28,838 --> 00:12:30,170
Yeah, we have
a good back-and-forth.
351
00:12:30,171 --> 00:12:33,920
So, anyway,
I just came by to say...
352
00:12:33,921 --> 00:12:37,837
I'm gonna, you know,
miss you.
353
00:12:37,838 --> 00:12:39,545
And stuff.
354
00:12:47,338 --> 00:12:48,754
Cooper.
355
00:12:48,755 --> 00:12:50,087
Yeah?
356
00:12:50,088 --> 00:12:51,212
Have you eaten yet?
357
00:12:51,213 --> 00:12:52,712
No.
358
00:12:52,713 --> 00:12:54,254
Then, why don't you sit down
and have dinner with me?
359
00:12:54,255 --> 00:12:56,254
Really?!
Mm-hmm.
360
00:12:56,255 --> 00:12:57,837
Thanks, Mrs. Otto.
361
00:12:57,838 --> 00:13:00,170
Just so you know,
I'm not expecting
anything fancy.
362
00:13:00,171 --> 00:13:01,337
I'll be fine with
whatever you're making.
363
00:13:01,338 --> 00:13:03,670
I'll just put
some truffle oil on it.
364
00:13:03,671 --> 00:13:04,962
I don't have truffle oil.
365
00:13:04,963 --> 00:13:06,504
Oh, shaved truffles
are fine.
366
00:13:06,505 --> 00:13:07,670
If you say "truffles" again,
367
00:13:07,671 --> 00:13:08,879
I will beat you
with this broom handle.
368
00:13:08,880 --> 00:13:10,754
See,
this is the back-and-forth
369
00:13:10,755 --> 00:13:11,754
that I'm talking about.
370
00:13:11,755 --> 00:13:13,545
Mm-hmm.
371
00:13:17,630 --> 00:13:19,712
I had the chance to get
that spoiled, arrogant brat
372
00:13:19,713 --> 00:13:20,962
out of my life
once and for all.
373
00:13:20,963 --> 00:13:22,170
Oliver's gone?!
374
00:13:22,171 --> 00:13:23,212
I'm talking about Cooper.
375
00:13:23,213 --> 00:13:24,254
Pay attention, Doris.
376
00:13:24,255 --> 00:13:25,629
I let him stay for dinner,
377
00:13:25,630 --> 00:13:26,920
and by
the end of the night,
378
00:13:26,921 --> 00:13:28,004
I am blow-torching
his pudding
379
00:13:28,005 --> 00:13:29,504
to make it a crème brûlée.
380
00:13:29,505 --> 00:13:31,504
It sounds like
he needs you in his life.
381
00:13:31,505 --> 00:13:33,212
I know,
and I want to help him,
382
00:13:33,213 --> 00:13:35,004
but I can't have Gina
going anywhere.
383
00:13:35,005 --> 00:13:37,587
She's made Oliver
mildly pleasant.
384
00:13:37,588 --> 00:13:39,004
Then you're gonna have
to teach Cooper
385
00:13:39,005 --> 00:13:40,337
to be less
of a spoiled brat.
386
00:13:40,338 --> 00:13:41,712
I just got Anna-Kat
to learn
387
00:13:41,713 --> 00:13:42,962
flushing is not optional.
388
00:13:42,963 --> 00:13:44,795
I don't have time
for extracurricular mothering.
389
00:13:44,796 --> 00:13:47,254
At least I have the Taylor
situation under control.
390
00:13:47,255 --> 00:13:49,629
She and her boyfriend
have been a little too PDA-y,
391
00:13:49,630 --> 00:13:51,962
and I told Greg that he needs
to put his foot down,
392
00:13:51,963 --> 00:13:53,170
and he actually did.
393
00:13:53,171 --> 00:13:55,504
Oh. So they're not
all over each other anymore?
394
00:13:55,505 --> 00:13:56,463
Haven't even seen them.
395
00:13:59,755 --> 00:14:01,879
Dude,
you played that all wrong.
396
00:14:01,880 --> 00:14:03,170
So wrong.
397
00:14:03,171 --> 00:14:04,920
Why?
398
00:14:04,921 --> 00:14:06,462
You want Taylor and Trip
to make out at your house
399
00:14:06,463 --> 00:14:08,004
'cause then they'd be
at your house.
Mm-hmm.
400
00:14:08,005 --> 00:14:09,629
They could be anywhere
right now,
401
00:14:09,630 --> 00:14:11,212
doing anything.
402
00:14:11,213 --> 00:14:13,379
God, you're right.
403
00:14:13,380 --> 00:14:15,129
I was the girl
who didn't bring boyfriends home
404
00:14:15,130 --> 00:14:16,587
because I didn't
like my parents.
Mm-hmm.
405
00:14:16,588 --> 00:14:18,962
And what were you and
your boyfriend doing
at Taylor's age?
406
00:14:18,963 --> 00:14:22,504
Well, they called me
"Everything Goes Katie," so...
407
00:14:22,505 --> 00:14:23,837
Oh, God!
408
00:14:27,296 --> 00:14:30,087
You see, Cooper has no one
looking out for him,
409
00:14:30,088 --> 00:14:31,712
so with him,
by being the bad cop,
410
00:14:31,713 --> 00:14:33,379
I'm actually
the good cop.
411
00:14:33,380 --> 00:14:34,379
And with Taylor,
412
00:14:34,380 --> 00:14:36,004
me being the bad cop
wasn't a good thing.
413
00:14:36,005 --> 00:14:37,795
Yeah, because now she's off
somewhere with Trip,
414
00:14:37,796 --> 00:14:39,087
playing
the childhood favorite,
415
00:14:39,088 --> 00:14:40,170
"You show me yours,
I'll show you mine."
416
00:14:40,171 --> 00:14:42,254
Aah! That's my baby!
417
00:14:42,255 --> 00:14:44,212
Come on, Greg.
She's 16.
418
00:14:44,213 --> 00:14:45,670
Don't make me
go to the la-la-la's.
419
00:14:45,671 --> 00:14:47,837
Face it--
your baby has urges.
420
00:14:47,838 --> 00:14:49,587
La-la-la-la, la-la-la-la,
421
00:14:49,588 --> 00:14:51,170
la-la-la-la, la-la-la-la!
Fine. I'll stop.
422
00:14:51,171 --> 00:14:52,004
La-la.
423
00:14:52,005 --> 00:14:53,629
I've got to work
with Cooper,
424
00:14:53,630 --> 00:14:55,087
and you've got to make it
425
00:14:55,088 --> 00:14:57,045
so that Taylor and Trip
feel comfortable in the house
426
00:14:57,046 --> 00:14:58,254
so that we can
keep an eye on her.
427
00:14:58,255 --> 00:15:00,504
So I want Taylor and Trip
to make out in front of me,
428
00:15:00,505 --> 00:15:02,587
and you want to spend more time
with Cooper Bradford?
429
00:15:02,588 --> 00:15:04,045
I know I say this a lot,
430
00:15:04,046 --> 00:15:06,004
so it's lost a little bit
of its meaning,
431
00:15:06,005 --> 00:15:07,712
but the kids
have truly ruined our lives.
432
00:15:14,130 --> 00:15:15,545
So, to stay friends
with Oliver,
433
00:15:15,546 --> 00:15:16,920
you have to become friends
with Gina.
434
00:15:16,921 --> 00:15:17,920
Is that it?
435
00:15:17,921 --> 00:15:19,045
So easy.
436
00:15:19,046 --> 00:15:20,004
For a girl like Gina,
437
00:15:20,005 --> 00:15:21,545
I bet her number's
pretty low.
438
00:15:21,546 --> 00:15:22,504
5 grand feels right.
439
00:15:22,505 --> 00:15:24,129
You can't buy
her friendship.
440
00:15:24,130 --> 00:15:25,795
You are going to
have to stop acting
441
00:15:25,796 --> 00:15:27,795
like an entitled ass,
442
00:15:27,796 --> 00:15:29,962
and I'm going to
teach you how.
443
00:15:29,963 --> 00:15:31,504
Lesson one--
444
00:15:31,505 --> 00:15:34,212
never say "custom-made
Italian leather tote bag"
445
00:15:34,213 --> 00:15:35,962
ever again.
446
00:15:35,963 --> 00:15:37,129
Lesson one,
447
00:15:37,130 --> 00:15:39,379
and I'm already way outside
my comfort zone.
448
00:15:41,213 --> 00:15:43,212
See, all of these things
in here
449
00:15:43,213 --> 00:15:45,129
are meals that normal people
would eat.
450
00:15:45,130 --> 00:15:47,545
Chicken fingers?
That's a meal.
451
00:15:47,546 --> 00:15:49,004
Those look gross,
452
00:15:49,005 --> 00:15:50,796
but with
a little truffle oil--
453
00:15:54,880 --> 00:15:56,420
Say you're at a restaurant,
454
00:15:56,421 --> 00:15:59,129
and you accidentally
knock over someone's drink.
455
00:15:59,130 --> 00:16:00,462
What do you do?
456
00:16:00,463 --> 00:16:02,587
I crumple two $50s
and throw it at them.
457
00:16:02,588 --> 00:16:04,045
No.
458
00:16:04,046 --> 00:16:05,962
You say "sorry"
and offer to clean it up.
459
00:16:05,963 --> 00:16:07,587
How do you know
all this stuff?
460
00:16:11,880 --> 00:16:13,254
Anna-Kat: Dr. Ellie,
461
00:16:13,255 --> 00:16:16,129
in the beginning,
Franklin was so romantic.
462
00:16:16,130 --> 00:16:18,254
He picked me first
at dodgeball,
463
00:16:18,255 --> 00:16:20,254
he gave me
all the good crayons,
464
00:16:20,255 --> 00:16:21,837
but now,
465
00:16:21,838 --> 00:16:24,379
it's like we're not even
in the same conversation.
466
00:16:24,380 --> 00:16:26,087
Anna-Kat,
I don't think Franklin
467
00:16:26,088 --> 00:16:27,795
is acting like
he's in a relationship.
468
00:16:27,796 --> 00:16:30,212
You hit the nail
on the head, Doc.
469
00:16:30,213 --> 00:16:31,254
No, I mean,
470
00:16:31,255 --> 00:16:32,920
you're in a relationship
with Franklin,
471
00:16:32,921 --> 00:16:34,295
but he's not in one
with you.
472
00:16:34,296 --> 00:16:35,629
Franklin doesn't even know
473
00:16:35,630 --> 00:16:36,754
you guys
are boyfriend-girlfriend.
474
00:16:36,755 --> 00:16:38,712
Is that true, Franklin?
475
00:16:38,713 --> 00:16:40,087
What class is this?
476
00:16:40,088 --> 00:16:41,587
You see what
I'm dealing with here?
477
00:16:41,588 --> 00:16:43,962
I'm going to my mother's.
478
00:16:49,171 --> 00:16:50,504
Taylor! Can I talk to you
for a minute?!
479
00:16:50,505 --> 00:16:51,629
What?!
480
00:16:55,380 --> 00:16:57,379
I just wanted to tell you
I made a mistake.
481
00:16:57,380 --> 00:16:59,004
Your and Trip's PDA
is normal,
482
00:16:59,005 --> 00:17:00,795
and I was wrong
to get in the way of that.
483
00:17:00,796 --> 00:17:02,754
I accept your apology.
484
00:17:02,755 --> 00:17:05,795
And no more intercepting
my back rubs.
Fine.
485
00:17:05,796 --> 00:17:07,379
Because you're comfortable
486
00:17:07,380 --> 00:17:08,587
showing how you feel about Trip
in front of me,
487
00:17:08,588 --> 00:17:10,379
I'm comfortable showing
how I feel about your mother
488
00:17:10,380 --> 00:17:11,504
in front of you.
489
00:17:11,505 --> 00:17:13,670
Kitty Cat, are you there?
490
00:17:13,671 --> 00:17:16,295
Yes, Snuggle Bug?
491
00:17:16,296 --> 00:17:18,462
I just wanted to tell you
I love you very, very much.
492
00:17:18,463 --> 00:17:20,170
That is so sweet.
493
00:17:20,171 --> 00:17:22,462
Seems like Papa Bear
deserves a widdle kiss.
494
00:17:22,463 --> 00:17:23,796
Aww.
495
00:17:25,713 --> 00:17:27,670
All right, I get it. Okay.
496
00:17:27,671 --> 00:17:29,254
Okay.
497
00:17:29,255 --> 00:17:30,963
Okay! Stop!
498
00:17:31,755 --> 00:17:33,170
Oh, we're just showing
that we like each other.
499
00:17:33,171 --> 00:17:34,046
That's
what couples do.
Mm-hmm.
500
00:17:35,380 --> 00:17:36,670
All right.
501
00:17:36,671 --> 00:17:38,004
Okay. I get it.
502
00:17:38,005 --> 00:17:39,212
I get it!
503
00:17:39,213 --> 00:17:40,962
Do you?
'Cause we can keep going.
504
00:17:40,963 --> 00:17:42,337
I get it.
She gets it.
505
00:17:42,338 --> 00:17:43,420
Oh.
506
00:17:49,005 --> 00:17:50,545
Hey, guys.
Come on in.
507
00:17:50,546 --> 00:17:52,420
Mi casa es su casa.
508
00:17:52,421 --> 00:17:53,879
Cooper,
this is my house.
509
00:17:53,880 --> 00:17:55,462
What's he doing here?
510
00:17:55,463 --> 00:17:56,920
Yeah,
what are you doing here?
511
00:17:56,921 --> 00:17:59,838
He came over
to apologize to Gina.
512
00:18:05,338 --> 00:18:08,545
Look, I understand why
you don't like me very much.
513
00:18:08,546 --> 00:18:10,587
I know I can be a...
514
00:18:10,588 --> 00:18:12,254
Um, what was
that phrase again?
515
00:18:12,255 --> 00:18:14,545
The worst person
on the planet.
Right.
516
00:18:14,546 --> 00:18:17,087
Um,
but I'm working on it.
517
00:18:17,088 --> 00:18:19,962
You see this bag?
518
00:18:19,963 --> 00:18:21,504
You shouldn't care
that it's more expensive
519
00:18:21,505 --> 00:18:22,670
than anything
you have ever owned
520
00:18:22,671 --> 00:18:24,712
or will ever own.
521
00:18:24,713 --> 00:18:26,379
That's not important
anymore.
522
00:18:26,380 --> 00:18:28,004
Wow.
523
00:18:28,005 --> 00:18:29,879
You don't realize it,
but that's growth.
524
00:18:29,880 --> 00:18:31,379
I want us all
to be able to hang out,
525
00:18:31,380 --> 00:18:33,170
so if that means
I need to be less awesome,
526
00:18:33,171 --> 00:18:34,588
then I'm willing
to do that.
527
00:18:40,005 --> 00:18:40,796
Will you give me
another shot?
528
00:18:42,671 --> 00:18:44,337
I know
it's hard to say "yes"
529
00:18:44,338 --> 00:18:46,795
after he just paid himself
a compliment in his apology,
530
00:18:46,796 --> 00:18:49,046
but we're working on that.
531
00:18:49,630 --> 00:18:51,254
Okay.
532
00:18:51,255 --> 00:18:52,920
I'll give you
another shot.
533
00:18:52,921 --> 00:18:54,296
Awesome.
534
00:18:58,713 --> 00:19:01,004
Dude.
535
00:19:01,005 --> 00:19:02,129
Dude?
536
00:19:02,130 --> 00:19:02,838
Dude!
537
00:19:06,463 --> 00:19:08,754
You say "dude" four times,
and you're friends again.
538
00:19:08,755 --> 00:19:10,337
Guys have it so easy.
539
00:19:10,338 --> 00:19:11,837
Oliver and I
are hanging out tonight.
540
00:19:11,838 --> 00:19:12,920
You can come with us
if you want.
541
00:19:12,921 --> 00:19:15,045
Really? Cool.
542
00:19:15,046 --> 00:19:16,212
Um, what did you guys
have planned?
543
00:19:16,213 --> 00:19:18,337
I say we go bowling.
544
00:19:18,338 --> 00:19:19,670
We're never gonna find
an open lane.
545
00:19:19,671 --> 00:19:20,754
It's league night.
546
00:19:20,755 --> 00:19:22,379
I can get us a lane.
547
00:19:23,963 --> 00:19:25,962
- Yeah!
- Wow!
548
00:19:25,963 --> 00:19:27,837
Having a bowling alley
in your house
549
00:19:27,838 --> 00:19:29,837
is the stupidest thing
I've ever seen,
550
00:19:29,838 --> 00:19:31,670
but those appetizers
covered in shaved truffles
551
00:19:31,671 --> 00:19:32,837
were delicious.
552
00:19:32,838 --> 00:19:34,254
Yeah, it's no
pig in your living room,
553
00:19:34,255 --> 00:19:35,629
but I guess
it's kind of cool.
554
00:19:36,880 --> 00:19:38,670
What happens if someone
approaches you on the street
555
00:19:38,671 --> 00:19:40,420
and asks for directions?
556
00:19:40,421 --> 00:19:43,587
Have my bodyguard
push them in the gutter?
No.
557
00:19:43,588 --> 00:19:46,462
You give them directions.
558
00:19:46,463 --> 00:19:47,920
I have so much to learn.
559
00:19:55,046 --> 00:19:56,795
Great job, babe!
560
00:20:12,921 --> 00:20:14,963
Franklin would love this.
561
00:20:19,713 --> 00:20:22,212
My breakup with Franklin
was really nasty.
562
00:20:22,213 --> 00:20:26,004
Lots of tears,
lots of yelling.
563
00:20:26,005 --> 00:20:29,212
Franklin is
a pretty passionate guy.
564
00:20:29,213 --> 00:20:31,879
It's the quality
I like most about him,
565
00:20:31,880 --> 00:20:34,337
but it's also
why we broke up.
566
00:20:34,338 --> 00:20:35,587
Funny.
567
00:20:35,588 --> 00:20:38,212
I'm so sorry to hear that,
Anna-Kat.
568
00:20:38,213 --> 00:20:39,254
Piece of advice--
569
00:20:39,255 --> 00:20:41,045
don't make
the same mistake I did.
570
00:20:41,046 --> 00:20:43,879
Enjoy these moments.
571
00:20:43,880 --> 00:20:45,462
Breakups are hard,
Anna-Kat,
572
00:20:45,463 --> 00:20:48,212
but most relationships
aren't meant to last.
573
00:20:48,213 --> 00:20:50,754
{\an8}But don't worry--
the good ones do.
574
00:20:57,296 --> 00:20:58,629
{\an8}Franklin, you came back!
575
00:21:01,255 --> 00:21:02,296
{\an8}I forgot my jacket.
576
00:21:04,755 --> 00:21:06,379
{\an8}He can't stay away
from me.
40330
Can't find what you're looking for?
Get subtitles in any language from opensubtitles.com, and translate them here.
Afrikaans
Akan
Albanian
Amharic
Arabic
Armenian
Azerbaijani
Basque
Belarusian
Bemba
Bengali
Bihari
Bosnian
Breton
Bulgarian
Cambodian
Catalan
Cebuano
Cherokee
Chichewa
Chinese (Simplified)
Chinese (Traditional)
Corsican
Croatian
Czech
Danish
Dutch
English
Esperanto
Estonian
Faroese
Finnish
Galician
Georgian
German
Greek
Guarani
Haitian Creole
Hausa
Hawaiian
Hebrew
Hmong
Hungarian
Icelandic
Indonesian
Irish
Italian
Japanese
Kazakh
Kinyarwanda
Kirundi
Kongo
Korean
Krio (Sierra Leone)
Kurdish
Kyrgyz
Laothian
Latin
Latvian
Lithuanian
Luganda
Luo
Luxembourgish
Macedonian
Malagasy
Malay
Maltese
Maori
Mauritian Creole
Moldavian
Mongolian
Myanmar (Burmese)
Montenegrin
Nepali
Norwegian
Pashto
Persian
Polish
Portuguese (Brazil)
Portuguese (Portugal)
Quechua
Romanian
Romansh
Russian
Samoan
Scots Gaelic
Serbian
Sesotho
Setswana
Seychellois Creole
Shona
Sindhi
Sinhalese
Slovak
Slovenian
Somali
Spanish
Swedish
Tajik
Thai
Tigrinya
Tonga
Turkish
Turkmen
Ukrainian
Uzbek
Vietnamese
Welsh
Wolof