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These are the user uploaded subtitles that are being translated: 1 00:00:03,363 --> 00:00:07,066 Oh, my God, you are the stupidest dad in the world! 2 00:00:07,117 --> 00:00:09,434 Did the divorce kill some of your brain cells? 3 00:00:09,486 --> 00:00:12,404 I hate cleaning houses when the clients are home. 4 00:00:12,455 --> 00:00:14,073 I can't believe you! 5 00:00:14,124 --> 00:00:15,407 Be invisible. 6 00:00:15,458 --> 00:00:17,076 Why would you buy me these jeans?! 7 00:00:17,127 --> 00:00:18,911 Look at these holes! 8 00:00:18,962 --> 00:00:21,297 They're in all the wrong places! 9 00:00:21,381 --> 00:00:22,881 How am I supposed to know 10 00:00:22,949 --> 00:00:25,450 the right holes from the wrong holes, huh?! 11 00:00:25,502 --> 00:00:27,369 Well, maybe that's why Mom left you! 12 00:00:29,756 --> 00:00:31,757 You don't have the right to ignore my feelings! ♪ La, la, la, la. ♪. 13 00:00:31,808 --> 00:00:33,676 Fine, then I'll "la-la-la" you! La, la, la, la, 14 00:00:33,760 --> 00:00:35,627 La-la-la-la! Can't hear you! ♪ La-la-la-la! ♪. 15 00:00:35,679 --> 00:00:37,396 And I'll tell you something else, Dad! 16 00:00:37,463 --> 00:00:38,897 You're not fooling anybody 17 00:00:38,965 --> 00:00:41,650 with that stupid toupee. 18 00:00:41,735 --> 00:00:42,518 She's crazy. 19 00:00:42,602 --> 00:00:44,069 This is all my own hair. 20 00:00:44,137 --> 00:00:45,237 Ah! 21 00:00:46,806 --> 00:00:48,841 It's made from my own hair. 22 00:00:48,908 --> 00:00:50,609 Say, ladies, 23 00:00:50,660 --> 00:00:53,495 I'm leaving town for a business trip, for a couple of weeks, 24 00:00:53,580 --> 00:00:55,948 and I'm looking to hire a live-in 25 00:00:55,999 --> 00:00:58,367 to look after the house and, uh, Natalie. 26 00:00:58,451 --> 00:01:01,086 One of you interested in a little extra pay? 27 00:01:01,154 --> 00:01:02,421 No hablo ingles. 28 00:01:03,957 --> 00:01:07,743 ... English. 29 00:01:09,245 --> 00:01:10,879 Whoo! 30 00:01:10,947 --> 00:01:12,114 ♪ Here we go ♪ 31 00:01:12,182 --> 00:01:15,434 ♪ Oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh! ♪. 32 00:01:15,649 --> 00:01:18,208 Sync and corrections by Sp8ky for www.addic7ed.com 33 00:01:23,727 --> 00:01:26,061 I guess Hope's not going to let us sleep in today. 34 00:01:26,146 --> 00:01:28,397 Sh-sh-sh-sh. Maybe if we just lay here quietly, 35 00:01:28,481 --> 00:01:30,316 she'll go back to sleep. 36 00:01:30,367 --> 00:01:33,168 Ow! God... I guess not. 37 00:01:34,321 --> 00:01:35,821 Hey, Hope. 38 00:01:35,872 --> 00:01:39,325 How about just five more minutes, okay? 39 00:01:42,746 --> 00:01:44,463 Okay. My nipple's caught! Uh, try pushing it! 40 00:01:44,530 --> 00:01:46,531 Okay... 41 00:01:46,583 --> 00:01:47,750 Ooh, God... 42 00:01:47,834 --> 00:01:49,251 That's not it! Try pulling it, try pulling it! 43 00:01:53,340 --> 00:01:55,341 Oh! Oh! 44 00:01:55,392 --> 00:01:57,176 You were right. 45 00:01:57,227 --> 00:01:59,345 Grapes make taking walks so much more fun. 46 00:01:59,396 --> 00:02:01,263 One mushy one left, you want it? 47 00:02:01,348 --> 00:02:02,815 All yours. 48 00:02:13,410 --> 00:02:15,394 Ha-ha! 49 00:02:15,445 --> 00:02:16,245 I did it. 50 00:02:17,113 --> 00:02:18,747 What's all this? 51 00:02:18,832 --> 00:02:21,116 Jimmy almost lost his nipple in a crib accident. 52 00:02:21,201 --> 00:02:22,284 Told you those long nipples were going to 53 00:02:22,369 --> 00:02:23,585 come back to haunt you one day. 54 00:02:23,653 --> 00:02:25,704 He gets that from my side of the family. 55 00:02:25,755 --> 00:02:28,590 On the plus side, they're also very sensitive. 56 00:02:28,675 --> 00:02:30,008 Oh, good to know. 57 00:02:30,076 --> 00:02:32,044 Anyway, the crib's been recalled, 58 00:02:32,095 --> 00:02:33,946 along with a lot of this other old baby stuff, too. 59 00:02:34,013 --> 00:02:35,431 It can't be that dangerous. 60 00:02:35,515 --> 00:02:37,883 Jimmy played with most of this stuff; he's fine. 61 00:02:37,934 --> 00:02:41,253 No, come to think of it, he was always getting hurt. 62 00:02:55,535 --> 00:02:58,070 My nipple, my nipple, my nipple! 63 00:02:58,121 --> 00:03:01,373 Yeah, in retrospects, I can see that we should've 64 00:03:01,441 --> 00:03:03,442 paid more attention to child safety. 65 00:03:03,493 --> 00:03:05,444 And now Hope has to sleep in a cardboard box 66 00:03:05,495 --> 00:03:07,379 and play with a teddy bear I made from a bag of rice 67 00:03:07,447 --> 00:03:08,997 and a fuzzy toilet seat cover. 68 00:03:09,082 --> 00:03:10,466 Come to think of it, she could choke on the rice. 69 00:03:10,550 --> 00:03:11,717 Damn it! 70 00:03:11,784 --> 00:03:13,168 We need to find a way to make some fast money! 71 00:03:13,253 --> 00:03:15,254 Jimmy, you think if we knew how to make fast money, 72 00:03:15,321 --> 00:03:17,622 we would have spent our whole lives making slow money?! 73 00:03:17,674 --> 00:03:20,659 Unfortunately, I know how to make some fast money. 74 00:03:20,727 --> 00:03:22,728 Hello. 75 00:03:22,795 --> 00:03:25,063 Hi. I don't know if you're still looking for a live-in but... 76 00:03:25,131 --> 00:03:26,648 Oh, I'm so sorry. 77 00:03:26,733 --> 00:03:28,016 We already hired somebody. 78 00:03:28,101 --> 00:03:29,852 She threw soup at me! 79 00:03:29,936 --> 00:03:31,220 I quit. Wha... 80 00:03:33,473 --> 00:03:34,740 You're hired. 81 00:03:37,883 --> 00:03:39,417 Burt, if we go over it one more time, 82 00:03:39,468 --> 00:03:40,936 we're just gonna start crying again. 83 00:03:41,020 --> 00:03:43,605 It's just for two weeks, till we have enough money 84 00:03:43,689 --> 00:03:46,424 to buy Hope all the new stuff she needs. 85 00:03:46,475 --> 00:03:48,193 We can make money some other way. 86 00:03:48,260 --> 00:03:50,478 What if I sell my plasma 87 00:03:50,563 --> 00:03:52,764 to those people that make the fancy TVs?! 88 00:03:54,983 --> 00:03:56,767 I miss Virginia. 89 00:03:56,819 --> 00:03:59,737 We all miss Virginia, Maw maw. 90 00:03:59,788 --> 00:04:01,289 That's why we're eating meatloaf, 91 00:04:01,373 --> 00:04:03,374 which somebody thought would be great if it was made of tuna. 92 00:04:03,441 --> 00:04:05,943 Well, it should've worked. It's the chicken from the sea. 93 00:04:05,994 --> 00:04:07,712 But that's stupid, no one eats chicken meatloaf. 94 00:04:07,779 --> 00:04:08,663 It doesn't even make sense! 95 00:04:10,175 --> 00:04:13,314 I'm sorry, it's not the loaf. I just miss my wife. 96 00:04:13,434 --> 00:04:16,219 Time for my bath. Been a couple of days, so 97 00:04:16,303 --> 00:04:17,354 prepare for a long one. 98 00:04:19,506 --> 00:04:20,974 Good luck with that. 99 00:04:21,025 --> 00:04:22,275 I'll tell you what you missed on Phineas & Ferb. 100 00:04:22,342 --> 00:04:24,177 Oh, too late. I already got my finger on my nose. 101 00:04:24,228 --> 00:04:25,362 You can put your finger anywhere you want. 102 00:04:25,446 --> 00:04:27,330 You're still bathing Maw Maw. 103 00:04:27,398 --> 00:04:28,565 Only reason we're doing this is 'cause of your baby! 104 00:04:29,784 --> 00:04:32,202 I don't blame you. I blame society 105 00:04:32,286 --> 00:04:33,686 which says we can't let you swallow the same toys, 106 00:04:33,738 --> 00:04:35,155 which passed harmlessly through your father. 107 00:04:36,791 --> 00:04:39,542 Look, I'll do all the other chores except for Maw Maw. 108 00:04:39,627 --> 00:04:41,077 Every time I try to take care of here, she thinks I'm Paw Paw, 109 00:04:41,162 --> 00:04:42,195 and she tries to kiss me! 110 00:04:42,246 --> 00:04:43,413 She did that to me all the time. 111 00:04:43,497 --> 00:04:44,831 You just have to know how to handle it. 112 00:04:47,301 --> 00:04:50,804 Hey there, Mr. Gardener Man, 113 00:04:50,871 --> 00:04:54,424 I got something better for you to do with that green thumb. 114 00:04:57,344 --> 00:04:59,179 Hello, Burt! 115 00:05:00,547 --> 00:05:02,065 Good luck with that bath. 116 00:05:02,149 --> 00:05:03,983 Just so you're prepared, the carpet does match the drapes, 117 00:05:04,051 --> 00:05:05,351 and it's a deep shag. 118 00:05:07,354 --> 00:05:10,273 Oh, my God. 119 00:05:16,813 --> 00:05:19,099 You can stop doing my laundry! 120 00:05:19,166 --> 00:05:20,417 I won't need any more outfits 121 00:05:20,501 --> 00:05:22,401 because I'm never leaving my house again! 122 00:05:25,589 --> 00:05:27,373 What's wrong? 123 00:05:27,425 --> 00:05:30,343 I have a third eye, that's what's wrong! 124 00:05:30,411 --> 00:05:35,181 Oh, but that's nothing. I can fix that. 125 00:05:35,249 --> 00:05:36,216 You can? 126 00:05:36,267 --> 00:05:37,183 Oh, yeah! 127 00:05:42,773 --> 00:05:43,589 Okay... 128 00:05:45,059 --> 00:05:47,026 Oh, my God! It's completely disappeared! 129 00:05:47,094 --> 00:05:50,096 Mm-hmm. I've always been good with makeup and stuff. 130 00:05:50,147 --> 00:05:51,798 My son only lets me do it to him 131 00:05:51,866 --> 00:05:53,616 when we've both had a few beers, 132 00:05:53,701 --> 00:05:56,486 and I absolutely promise never to tell anyone. 133 00:05:56,570 --> 00:05:58,371 Don't tell anyone I said that... 134 00:06:01,459 --> 00:06:04,944 Okay! 135 00:06:04,995 --> 00:06:06,062 You're dry now, 136 00:06:06,182 --> 00:06:08,248 and don't worry, that thing on your back was a raisin. 137 00:06:08,299 --> 00:06:09,115 Oh, thank you. 138 00:06:09,166 --> 00:06:11,050 I feel better. 139 00:06:11,118 --> 00:06:12,635 Let me just get your fiber shake ready 140 00:06:12,720 --> 00:06:14,921 and your humidifier like you like it, 141 00:06:14,972 --> 00:06:16,455 and you are good to go! 142 00:06:16,507 --> 00:06:18,725 Just finding the switch on this thing... 143 00:06:22,179 --> 00:06:24,964 Let me pour you a drink. 144 00:06:25,015 --> 00:06:26,232 Wilfrid... 145 00:06:28,352 --> 00:06:32,322 Make that cocktail the same way I like my men. 146 00:06:33,807 --> 00:06:36,642 Stiff... 147 00:06:36,694 --> 00:06:39,746 I'm not Paw Paw, I'm your great grandson, Maw Maw! 148 00:06:40,998 --> 00:06:41,981 Ah! 149 00:06:43,250 --> 00:06:45,752 What are you doing in my room? 150 00:06:46,638 --> 00:06:48,888 Why am I sweating? 151 00:06:48,939 --> 00:06:51,057 Am I hot flashing again? 152 00:06:51,108 --> 00:06:52,609 When will this menopause end?! 153 00:06:59,399 --> 00:07:00,250 Hey, it's me! 154 00:07:00,334 --> 00:07:01,501 Sorry. 155 00:07:01,568 --> 00:07:03,002 It's a little chilly out here. 156 00:07:03,070 --> 00:07:05,255 Didn't want my lips to get chapped before I saw ya. 157 00:07:05,339 --> 00:07:08,007 The only thing that doesn't cover is your lips. 158 00:07:08,075 --> 00:07:09,676 What are you doing here anyway? 159 00:07:09,743 --> 00:07:11,261 I missed ya. 160 00:07:11,345 --> 00:07:13,096 So I thought I'd come over here and climb through your window. 161 00:07:13,180 --> 00:07:15,882 Aw, I missed you, too. Mmm... 162 00:07:15,933 --> 00:07:19,085 It will be just like when we were teenagers. 163 00:07:19,136 --> 00:07:21,604 Even better, because now we don't have to make it quick 164 00:07:21,689 --> 00:07:23,389 so you could be home in time for Alf. 165 00:07:23,440 --> 00:07:24,524 Ooh! 166 00:07:33,484 --> 00:07:35,602 Time to wake up, Wilfrid, dear. 167 00:07:37,321 --> 00:07:39,739 What's that smell? 168 00:07:39,790 --> 00:07:42,408 Breakfast, like I make every morning. 169 00:07:42,459 --> 00:07:44,644 Come on, it's getting cold. 170 00:07:49,416 --> 00:07:52,168 French toast will be ready in a jiffy. 171 00:07:52,253 --> 00:07:55,421 And then I'll take care of the baby while you eat. 172 00:07:55,472 --> 00:07:59,058 And the syrup's heating up, just like you like it, too. 173 00:08:04,515 --> 00:08:07,496 Well, good morning, dear. 174 00:08:19,446 --> 00:08:21,480 I'm so glad you got this job. 175 00:08:21,532 --> 00:08:23,032 I know, that was quite a night. 176 00:08:23,117 --> 00:08:25,151 It actually was like being a teenager again. 177 00:08:25,202 --> 00:08:26,652 It was awesome. 178 00:08:26,704 --> 00:08:29,038 Although I do kind of wish I was watching Alf right now. 179 00:08:29,123 --> 00:08:31,591 Listen, you better get out of here before Natalie wakes up. 180 00:08:31,658 --> 00:08:34,010 And use the window, for old time's sake. 181 00:08:37,264 --> 00:08:38,798 Oh! Wha...?! 182 00:08:38,849 --> 00:08:40,733 Whoa! What happened to the ladder? 183 00:08:40,801 --> 00:08:42,752 Wha... huh? 184 00:08:44,054 --> 00:08:46,356 Get... 185 00:08:49,676 --> 00:08:51,110 What the hell?! 186 00:08:51,178 --> 00:08:52,511 Who is that?! 187 00:08:52,563 --> 00:08:54,797 Who is that?! 188 00:08:54,865 --> 00:08:56,532 Oh... 189 00:08:56,617 --> 00:08:59,118 Would you believe your dad hired a butler? 190 00:08:59,186 --> 00:09:01,854 And the butler just did it. 191 00:09:01,905 --> 00:09:03,606 Not helping. 192 00:09:07,233 --> 00:09:08,766 Put your pants on, 193 00:09:08,851 --> 00:09:11,385 and stop everything you were doing or were about to do. 194 00:09:11,437 --> 00:09:12,987 Burt, take this one downstairs. 195 00:09:14,543 --> 00:09:16,891 Okay, Romeo, let's go. 196 00:09:16,942 --> 00:09:21,162 He walks like a penguin. 197 00:09:21,230 --> 00:09:22,864 What are you doing? 198 00:09:22,915 --> 00:09:25,733 You shouldn't be sneaking boys into your room. 199 00:09:25,784 --> 00:09:27,068 You do. 200 00:09:27,119 --> 00:09:29,337 Wha... he's my husband. 201 00:09:29,404 --> 00:09:32,257 Well Robert's my boyfriend, and we're just as in love. 202 00:09:32,341 --> 00:09:35,076 Probably more so, because we're young and hot. 203 00:09:35,127 --> 00:09:36,911 Wha... Why are you so upset about this? 204 00:09:36,962 --> 00:09:38,296 I thought you were going to be cool. 205 00:09:38,380 --> 00:09:40,882 No, no, no, I am still cool! 206 00:09:40,933 --> 00:09:43,017 I'm like, um... wha... 207 00:09:43,233 --> 00:09:44,834 Alicia Silverstone. 208 00:09:44,901 --> 00:09:47,586 And Alicia would say that you are clueless 209 00:09:47,671 --> 00:09:49,505 about the risks of teenage sex. 210 00:09:49,573 --> 00:09:51,040 I don't know who that is. 211 00:09:51,091 --> 00:09:52,441 Is that like a friend of yours or something? 212 00:09:52,509 --> 00:09:54,543 Well, she was a very big star. 213 00:09:54,594 --> 00:09:56,912 Look, whatever celebrity you teens are into nowadays, 214 00:09:56,963 --> 00:09:58,964 they say "don't do it!" 215 00:09:59,049 --> 00:10:00,299 Raven Symone! 216 00:10:01,551 --> 00:10:02,968 I don't know! I... 217 00:10:03,053 --> 00:10:04,637 Kathy Perry! 218 00:10:06,857 --> 00:10:08,858 Science... 219 00:10:08,925 --> 00:10:10,943 Is there anything you can't do? 220 00:10:11,027 --> 00:10:13,229 Well, I talked to Natalie. 221 00:10:13,280 --> 00:10:14,530 She says, they haven't had sex yet. 222 00:10:14,597 --> 00:10:16,031 But I don't know if I believe her. 223 00:10:16,099 --> 00:10:17,616 I talked to Robert. They haven't. 224 00:10:17,701 --> 00:10:19,785 But he's getting close. I gave him a few tips. 225 00:10:19,870 --> 00:10:21,954 He is a slow song and a wine cooler 226 00:10:22,038 --> 00:10:23,372 away from closing the deal. 227 00:10:23,440 --> 00:10:24,957 What is wrong with you? 228 00:10:25,041 --> 00:10:26,492 Why are you encouraging this kid? 229 00:10:26,576 --> 00:10:28,160 What if Natalie gets pregnant? 230 00:10:28,245 --> 00:10:30,663 Well, you got pregnant. You don't like our life? 231 00:10:30,747 --> 00:10:32,248 No, Burt, I do! 232 00:10:32,299 --> 00:10:35,050 Well, it's just, as a rule, teenagers should... 233 00:10:35,118 --> 00:10:37,503 Son of a bitch, he's going back up there. 234 00:10:37,587 --> 00:10:40,172 Oh, yeah. I told him to wait about ten minutes. 235 00:10:40,257 --> 00:10:41,590 I guess he couldn't hold off. 236 00:10:41,641 --> 00:10:43,559 Which is disappointing, because most of my tips 237 00:10:43,626 --> 00:10:44,677 were about just that. 238 00:10:46,596 --> 00:10:48,397 Seriously?! 239 00:10:48,465 --> 00:10:49,932 Shouldn't you be cleaning 240 00:10:49,983 --> 00:10:51,300 or making me a cheese questadilla or something? 241 00:10:51,351 --> 00:10:52,685 You two, out of bed. 242 00:10:52,769 --> 00:10:54,069 I'm going to show you where this can lead to. 243 00:10:54,137 --> 00:10:56,638 I'm your ghost of teen pregnancy future. 244 00:10:58,608 --> 00:11:00,642 This is where we live. 245 00:11:00,694 --> 00:11:01,911 You can't see it from here, 246 00:11:01,978 --> 00:11:03,329 but there's Silly Putty 247 00:11:03,413 --> 00:11:04,780 plugging holes in the roof. 248 00:11:04,831 --> 00:11:06,482 On the plus side, we have a ton 249 00:11:06,533 --> 00:11:07,666 of empty Silly Putty eggs, 250 00:11:07,751 --> 00:11:09,418 which we can use for all sorts of things. 251 00:11:13,323 --> 00:11:15,491 That's my son pretending to smoke a pipe 252 00:11:15,542 --> 00:11:17,293 and getting a foot rub from his great-grandmother. 253 00:11:17,344 --> 00:11:18,928 I don't know what's going on, 254 00:11:18,995 --> 00:11:20,880 but trust me, those are the actions 255 00:11:20,964 --> 00:11:23,165 of a kid raised by teen parents. 256 00:11:23,216 --> 00:11:25,384 A multigenerational household 257 00:11:25,469 --> 00:11:27,186 leads to a strong family bond. 258 00:11:28,388 --> 00:11:30,139 How's that Harvey Wallbanger? 259 00:11:30,190 --> 00:11:33,726 Uh, tip-top, you little hotsy-totsy. 260 00:11:33,810 --> 00:11:35,361 23 skidoo. 261 00:11:38,365 --> 00:11:39,865 Okay. I got nothing for that one. 262 00:11:42,685 --> 00:11:45,321 Here's what I really wanted to show you. 263 00:11:51,211 --> 00:11:52,578 Cool! You went to Paris? 264 00:11:52,662 --> 00:11:54,547 No. My friend, Becky Decker, 265 00:11:54,631 --> 00:11:56,198 from high school did. 266 00:11:56,249 --> 00:11:58,867 She went to Paris with her college French class. 267 00:11:58,919 --> 00:12:00,586 And this is from my two friends 268 00:12:00,670 --> 00:12:02,338 who went to Hungary and Turkey 269 00:12:02,389 --> 00:12:04,540 while I was at home hungry for turkey. 270 00:12:04,591 --> 00:12:08,060 Oh, here's our prom photo. 271 00:12:08,144 --> 00:12:10,179 How many people get to look that fancy 272 00:12:10,230 --> 00:12:11,981 when welcoming their son into the world? 273 00:12:12,048 --> 00:12:13,849 Look at those fresh-faced kids. 274 00:12:13,917 --> 00:12:16,519 Take a good, hard look at that. 275 00:12:16,570 --> 00:12:18,220 This is what they look like 276 00:12:18,271 --> 00:12:19,488 four years later. 277 00:12:19,556 --> 00:12:21,023 Whoa, you guys aged, 278 00:12:21,074 --> 00:12:22,825 like, 20 years. 279 00:12:22,892 --> 00:12:24,610 Yeah, but we haven't aged at all since then. 280 00:12:24,694 --> 00:12:25,727 Explain that. 281 00:12:25,779 --> 00:12:26,946 Look, Natalie's maid, 282 00:12:27,030 --> 00:12:28,864 I appreciate what you're trying to do, 283 00:12:28,915 --> 00:12:30,232 but we're in love. 284 00:12:30,283 --> 00:12:31,900 And your son seems to be hooking up 285 00:12:31,952 --> 00:12:33,168 with your grandmother, 286 00:12:33,236 --> 00:12:35,204 so I don't know why you're worried about us. 287 00:12:35,255 --> 00:12:36,922 We're staying together, and that's that. 288 00:12:37,007 --> 00:12:38,958 Yes! No, we're not. 289 00:12:39,042 --> 00:12:40,426 I'm sorry, Robert. 290 00:12:40,510 --> 00:12:41,627 I do love you, but there's 291 00:12:41,711 --> 00:12:43,095 too much I want to do in my life. 292 00:12:43,179 --> 00:12:44,263 I... I want 293 00:12:44,347 --> 00:12:46,048 to try crepes in Paris 294 00:12:46,099 --> 00:12:48,100 and gelato in Rome. 295 00:12:48,184 --> 00:12:50,769 I want to trip my face off in Amsterdam! 296 00:12:50,854 --> 00:12:52,855 This is all too much for me. 297 00:12:52,922 --> 00:12:54,690 I think we should stop seeing each other. 298 00:13:09,873 --> 00:13:11,740 Love killer. 299 00:13:11,791 --> 00:13:13,993 You killed love. 300 00:13:14,077 --> 00:13:16,078 Here's your high-ball, darling. 301 00:13:16,129 --> 00:13:18,881 Hope you don't mind pot roast tonight. 302 00:13:18,948 --> 00:13:20,499 Horsefeathers, you dumb Dora. 303 00:13:20,584 --> 00:13:22,835 You know I think your cooking is swell. 304 00:13:22,919 --> 00:13:23,969 Oh, Wilfrid. 305 00:13:24,054 --> 00:13:26,455 Mmm... 306 00:13:32,012 --> 00:13:33,762 Oh, hey. 307 00:13:33,813 --> 00:13:35,797 Jimmy, you know I love your quirky family, 308 00:13:35,849 --> 00:13:37,683 but you nailing your great-grandmother 309 00:13:37,767 --> 00:13:39,485 is going to be a real deal breaker. 310 00:13:39,569 --> 00:13:40,986 Maw Maw's just in one of her delusions. 311 00:13:41,071 --> 00:13:42,304 She thinks I'm Wilfrid. 312 00:13:42,355 --> 00:13:44,023 But she's easier to take care of this way. 313 00:13:44,107 --> 00:13:45,357 She actually takes care of me. 314 00:13:45,442 --> 00:13:47,359 And if things go too far, I can stop her 315 00:13:47,444 --> 00:13:48,777 just by spraying her with this bottle. 316 00:13:48,828 --> 00:13:50,412 So kissing her on the lips wasn't going too far? 317 00:13:50,480 --> 00:13:51,914 Well, first of all, my mouth was closed. 318 00:13:51,981 --> 00:13:53,982 And second, can you smell that pot roast? 319 00:13:54,034 --> 00:13:56,118 Come on in. 320 00:13:56,169 --> 00:13:58,253 Dinner's... 321 00:13:58,321 --> 00:14:00,673 What the hell is your sister, Mabel, doing here? 322 00:14:00,757 --> 00:14:02,458 Oh, gee willikers, honey buns. 323 00:14:02,509 --> 00:14:05,327 Your pot roast is so swell, I invited her for dinner, see? 324 00:14:06,880 --> 00:14:09,648 How could you invite her today on this special occasion? 325 00:14:09,716 --> 00:14:11,183 What special occasion? 326 00:14:11,267 --> 00:14:13,218 Unbelievable. 327 00:14:14,387 --> 00:14:15,638 Every year! Aah! 328 00:14:15,689 --> 00:14:18,474 Get the spray bottle! 329 00:14:18,525 --> 00:14:21,343 You always forget our anniversary every year! 330 00:14:21,394 --> 00:14:22,645 Sabrina! 331 00:14:22,696 --> 00:14:24,363 Why do I always get my hopes up 332 00:14:24,447 --> 00:14:25,981 every year?! 333 00:14:26,032 --> 00:14:28,150 Squirt her! Squirt her! 334 00:14:28,201 --> 00:14:29,851 You know what? I don't think I should. 335 00:14:29,903 --> 00:14:31,954 'Cause she just really looks like she's hurting right now. 336 00:14:32,021 --> 00:14:33,572 She's really hurting me! 337 00:14:33,657 --> 00:14:34,957 That's who she's hurting! 338 00:14:38,995 --> 00:14:41,330 Do you still believe in love, Robert? Oh, my God! 339 00:14:41,381 --> 00:14:43,365 Oh, it's okay! It's okay, Robert! It's Burt. 340 00:14:43,416 --> 00:14:44,917 It's your ex-girlfriend's temporary maid's husband. 341 00:14:46,136 --> 00:14:47,703 I think I have an idea 342 00:14:47,754 --> 00:14:49,238 how we can get Natalie back. 343 00:14:50,807 --> 00:14:52,891 Do you still believe in love? 344 00:15:03,353 --> 00:15:06,155 You brought us to your high school sex hideout? 345 00:15:06,222 --> 00:15:08,557 You know, it sounds cheap when you say it like that. 346 00:15:08,608 --> 00:15:11,493 Me and Virginia called it the "Stabbin' Cabin." 347 00:15:11,561 --> 00:15:13,729 Which sounds cheap, too, now, 348 00:15:13,780 --> 00:15:15,330 but back then, we thought it was poetic. 349 00:15:15,398 --> 00:15:17,082 I brought you guys here 'cause my wife 350 00:15:17,167 --> 00:15:18,584 showed you what our lives were like, 351 00:15:18,668 --> 00:15:20,002 but she left out some parts. 352 00:15:24,674 --> 00:15:27,376 These ticket stubs are from our first movie date: 353 00:15:27,427 --> 00:15:28,961 Beverly Hills Cop II. 354 00:15:29,045 --> 00:15:30,512 Ah. 355 00:15:30,580 --> 00:15:33,682 This kernel of popcorn fell down Virginia's cleavage. 356 00:15:33,750 --> 00:15:36,084 Just when you think boobs can't get any better... 357 00:15:36,136 --> 00:15:37,386 butter flavored. 358 00:15:38,638 --> 00:15:41,056 Ah, this is the gum wrapper necklace 359 00:15:41,107 --> 00:15:43,025 that Virginia made me at pregnant girl camp. 360 00:15:45,445 --> 00:15:47,563 Ah, these are the pretend magazine covers 361 00:15:47,614 --> 00:15:49,898 we had made at Four Flags: Good Adventure Theme Park. 362 00:15:49,949 --> 00:15:51,150 How is that place? 363 00:15:51,234 --> 00:15:53,435 It's almost awesome. 364 00:15:53,503 --> 00:15:54,936 Look. 365 00:15:54,988 --> 00:15:57,206 Virginia and I were perfect for each other. 366 00:15:57,273 --> 00:15:59,374 Waiting wouldn't have made us more perfect, 367 00:15:59,442 --> 00:16:01,443 but it could have made us miss out on perfect, 368 00:16:01,494 --> 00:16:03,746 and I just don't want to see you guys miss out 369 00:16:03,797 --> 00:16:05,481 on your chance to have the perfect person, either. 370 00:16:06,949 --> 00:16:08,917 Oh, my God, he's right. 371 00:16:08,968 --> 00:16:11,286 We are perfect for each other. 372 00:16:11,337 --> 00:16:13,005 The world might be against you sometimes, 373 00:16:13,089 --> 00:16:15,123 but you'll always have an ally in me. 374 00:16:15,175 --> 00:16:16,508 Natalie! 375 00:16:16,793 --> 00:16:18,543 Natalie! 376 00:16:18,628 --> 00:16:20,328 I was never here! 377 00:16:20,380 --> 00:16:22,798 And remember, snitches get stitches. 378 00:16:26,771 --> 00:16:28,655 Natalie? 379 00:16:30,241 --> 00:16:31,741 Oh, my God. 380 00:16:31,826 --> 00:16:33,243 She's coming in! 381 00:16:33,327 --> 00:16:35,161 Robert, hide! 382 00:16:35,229 --> 00:16:36,863 She's going to kill you! 383 00:16:44,872 --> 00:16:48,041 Natalie, I know you're in here. 384 00:16:50,795 --> 00:16:52,596 How'd you find me? 385 00:16:52,680 --> 00:16:54,214 I called your dad. 386 00:16:54,265 --> 00:16:56,516 He uses GPS to track your phone. 387 00:16:56,584 --> 00:16:58,351 That put me in this general area, 388 00:16:58,419 --> 00:17:00,437 and then it didn't take the Mentalist to figure out 389 00:17:00,521 --> 00:17:01,771 you were in the Stabbin' Cabin. 390 00:17:01,856 --> 00:17:03,273 Where's Robert? 391 00:17:03,357 --> 00:17:04,774 He's not here yet. 392 00:17:04,859 --> 00:17:06,910 You got to get out of here before you ruin everything. 393 00:17:06,978 --> 00:17:08,311 I'd rather ruin tonight 394 00:17:08,396 --> 00:17:10,113 than let you ruin your whole life. 395 00:17:10,197 --> 00:17:12,148 Look, Robert and I are in love. 396 00:17:12,233 --> 00:17:13,483 We're meant to be, 397 00:17:13,568 --> 00:17:15,569 just like you and Burt, but with better grades. 398 00:17:15,620 --> 00:17:18,771 Fine, but that doesn't mean you have to sleep together. 399 00:17:18,823 --> 00:17:20,156 But we want to. 400 00:17:20,241 --> 00:17:21,491 We're ready. 401 00:17:21,576 --> 00:17:23,159 You're ready to have a baby? 402 00:17:23,244 --> 00:17:24,611 We know how to use condoms. 403 00:17:24,662 --> 00:17:26,746 We put them on cucumbers in health class. 404 00:17:26,797 --> 00:17:28,615 First of all, putting them on cucumbers 405 00:17:28,666 --> 00:17:30,867 is just setting yourself up for disappointment. 406 00:17:30,935 --> 00:17:32,302 And besides, 407 00:17:32,386 --> 00:17:35,622 condoms don't always work, 408 00:17:35,673 --> 00:17:38,508 and guys don't always stay. 409 00:17:38,593 --> 00:17:40,760 Burt did, and Robert would, too. 410 00:17:40,811 --> 00:17:43,963 And we could have a happy family just like you two. 411 00:17:44,015 --> 00:17:45,348 Yeah, fine. Maybe you will. 412 00:17:45,433 --> 00:17:47,434 Maybe you will be just like me. 413 00:17:47,485 --> 00:17:48,935 Maybe there'll be an accident, 414 00:17:48,986 --> 00:17:51,304 and maybe Robert will do the right thing 415 00:17:51,355 --> 00:17:55,075 and you'll have a family and be happy just like me. 416 00:17:55,142 --> 00:17:57,327 But... 417 00:17:57,411 --> 00:18:01,748 you'll always wonder why he stayed. 418 00:18:01,815 --> 00:18:05,452 Was it for you or the baby? 419 00:18:05,503 --> 00:18:07,754 You'll always wonder if you kept him from something, 420 00:18:07,821 --> 00:18:10,256 from being something more. 421 00:18:10,324 --> 00:18:12,208 Let's be honest... probably not a lot more, 422 00:18:12,293 --> 00:18:14,044 but something. 423 00:18:14,128 --> 00:18:16,663 Did he stay because he wanted to 424 00:18:16,714 --> 00:18:18,632 or because he had to? 425 00:18:18,683 --> 00:18:20,467 I poked a hole in the condom. 426 00:18:20,518 --> 00:18:22,835 What? 427 00:18:22,887 --> 00:18:25,271 Not your condom; our condom. 428 00:18:25,339 --> 00:18:26,506 Burt, what are you...? 429 00:18:26,557 --> 00:18:28,441 Look, Virginia, from the moment I met you, 430 00:18:28,509 --> 00:18:29,943 I knew you were the one. 431 00:18:30,010 --> 00:18:32,529 I also knew you were way, way out of my league. 432 00:18:32,613 --> 00:18:33,897 I was not. 433 00:18:33,981 --> 00:18:35,949 I was in a back brace. 434 00:18:36,016 --> 00:18:37,367 That was a bonus. 435 00:18:37,451 --> 00:18:39,736 It was like you were hot and bionic. 436 00:18:39,820 --> 00:18:41,655 Plus smart and funny. 437 00:18:41,706 --> 00:18:43,073 I knew my only shot 438 00:18:43,157 --> 00:18:45,358 was to get you pregnant so you had to marry me 439 00:18:45,409 --> 00:18:47,026 before you figured out you could do better. 440 00:18:47,078 --> 00:18:49,996 So, your plan for a lifetime of happiness 441 00:18:50,047 --> 00:18:53,133 was to trick me into getting pregnant at 15 years old? 442 00:18:53,200 --> 00:18:54,901 That was the best I could come up with. 443 00:18:56,053 --> 00:18:58,004 Well... 444 00:18:58,055 --> 00:19:00,924 it's hard to argue with your results. 445 00:19:15,690 --> 00:19:17,023 I'm confused. 446 00:19:17,074 --> 00:19:18,742 Does that mean we're supposed to have sex 447 00:19:18,826 --> 00:19:20,393 or not have sex or... 448 00:19:20,444 --> 00:19:21,945 Do whatever you want. We don't care. 449 00:19:22,029 --> 00:19:23,830 It was never really about you. 450 00:19:28,235 --> 00:19:30,069 ♪ I'll never stop loving you ♪. 451 00:19:30,121 --> 00:19:32,005 Oh... look. 452 00:19:32,072 --> 00:19:33,923 Oh... 453 00:19:34,008 --> 00:19:38,428 ♪ Whatever else I may do ♪. 454 00:19:38,512 --> 00:19:40,597 Happy anniversary, darling. 455 00:19:40,681 --> 00:19:42,799 It's beautiful. 456 00:19:42,883 --> 00:19:45,435 ♪ My love for you ♪ 457 00:19:45,519 --> 00:19:49,355 ♪ Will live till time itself ♪ 458 00:19:49,423 --> 00:19:51,674 ♪ Is through ♪ 459 00:19:53,411 --> 00:19:55,194 ♪ I'll never stop wanting you... ♪. 460 00:19:55,246 --> 00:19:56,713 What the hell is going on? 461 00:19:56,797 --> 00:19:58,214 Oh. 462 00:19:58,299 --> 00:20:01,050 We're just giving Maw Maw a special memory. 463 00:20:01,135 --> 00:20:03,303 It's cool. I'm fine with it. 464 00:20:03,370 --> 00:20:04,587 He's allowed to touch anything above the waist, 465 00:20:04,672 --> 00:20:06,038 and her boobs are so low, 466 00:20:06,090 --> 00:20:07,340 that doesn't really allow for much of anything. 467 00:20:09,927 --> 00:20:12,044 When it comes to wives, 468 00:20:12,096 --> 00:20:15,882 Barbara June, you are the cat's meow. 469 00:20:15,933 --> 00:20:18,518 Speaking of things that purr, 470 00:20:18,569 --> 00:20:21,521 I have a gift you can open. 471 00:20:21,572 --> 00:20:24,023 Here's a hint. 472 00:20:24,074 --> 00:20:26,025 It's my legs. 473 00:20:26,076 --> 00:20:28,111 Okay, we're done. 474 00:20:31,599 --> 00:20:33,399 Why am I wet? 475 00:20:34,952 --> 00:20:37,670 And why are there decorations out here? 476 00:20:37,738 --> 00:20:40,340 Did I drown in the tub, and this is my wake? 477 00:20:42,042 --> 00:20:43,593 Ooh... 478 00:20:43,677 --> 00:20:46,379 I'm here. I'm here. 479 00:20:46,430 --> 00:20:49,516 You're not dead, Maw Maw. 480 00:20:49,583 --> 00:20:52,478 Damn it, this life is taking forever. 481 00:20:53,144 --> 00:20:55,680 Hey, this is Wilfred's and my song. 482 00:20:55,689 --> 00:20:57,131 Really? I didn't know that. 483 00:20:57,251 --> 00:20:59,554 Oh yeah, we danced on this song years ago, 484 00:20:59,771 --> 00:21:01,696 on our wonderful anniversary. 485 00:21:01,816 --> 00:21:04,297 It's the year Wilfred gave me this necklace. 486 00:21:04,417 --> 00:21:06,832 It's my favorite memory. 487 00:21:07,480 --> 00:21:10,447 That's why I never take it off. 488 00:21:14,618 --> 00:21:16,627 Well I guess I won't be getting that necklace back. 489 00:21:16,747 --> 00:21:19,275 I'll get you a new necklace on our anniversary, 490 00:21:19,395 --> 00:21:21,622 which I promise to never forget. 491 00:21:24,533 --> 00:21:27,519 - You taste like your great grandmother. - I'll brush my teeth. 492 00:21:28,449 --> 00:21:31,491 Sync and corrections by Sp8ky for www.addic7ed.com 35132

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