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[â– â– ]
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>>AND THAT'S WHY YOU SHOULD
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NEVER LET GUNK BUILD UP ON YOUR
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PLATES. THE END.
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>>OH, READ US ANOTHER ONE,
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GRANDPA.
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>>YEAH, A GOOD ONE THIS TIME.
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>>WELL, YOU DIDN'T LIKE THE
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STORY OF "MR. RABBIT'S VERY
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CLEAN PLATE"?
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>>JUST FEEL LIKE I GOT IT RIGHT
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AWAY.
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>>YOUR BROTHER LIKED IT.
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>>I LIKE BUNNIES DRESSED AS
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PEOPLE.
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>>YOU WOULD.
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WELL, IT HAD A PRETTY SWEET
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MORAL.
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>>THAT YOU SHOULD ALWAYS CLEAN
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YOUR PLATE?
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>>YEAH. KEEP YOUR PLATES CLEAN.
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>>I GUESS SO.
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>>WELL, THIS BOOK'S FULL OF
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GREAT TALES LIKE THAT.
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"MR. BADGER'S DIRTY LAUNDRY",
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"GARY THE BEAR'S MESSY,
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MESSY CAVE",
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"CYNTHIA MINNOW'S SLOPPY POND".
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>>WHAT'S THIS BOOK ABOUT?
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>>OH... RIGHT THERE IS A VERY
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SPECIAL BOOK. BUT YOU TWO
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WOULDN'T BE INTERESTED IN THAT.
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>>WHY? WH-WHAT IS IT?
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>>THAT BOOK RIGHT THERE IS THE
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"TOME OF ALL STORIES".
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EVERY YARN EVER SPUN IS
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CONTAINED IN THOSE PAGES.
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>>DOES IT HAVE MAGIC?
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>>AND ROMANCE?
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>>AND A GUN?
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>>YES, IT HAS ALL OF THOSE
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THINGS. LET'S HAVE A LOOK AT IT.
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LET'S START HERE.
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"THERE WAS ONCE A PARTY;
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A VERY CIVILIZED PARTY."
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>>YES!
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>>REALLY?
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>>"AND THE FOG WAS ROLLING
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THICK ON THE CARSTON MANOR. A
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GROUP OF FRIENDS HAD GATHERED
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FOR A VERY SPECIAL OCCASION, ONE
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OF THEM WAS GETTING MARRIED."
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(CLAPPING)
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>>WHOA. WOW. THANK YOU, FRIENDS
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FOR BEING HERE ON MY LAST NIGHT
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AS A SINGLE MAN. I'M EXCITED AND
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HONOURED TO HAVE YOU JOIN ME FOR
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MY STAG PARTY.
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(CLAPPING)
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(COMMOTION)
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>>WHAT HAPPENED?
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>>SOMEBODY GET THE LIGHTS?
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>>ALL RIGHT.
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>>NOBODY MOVE.
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STANLEY'S BEEN MURDERED.
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THE FIRST THING WE MUST
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DETERMINE IS WHAT WEAPON WAS
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USED TO COMMIT--
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>>IT WAS A KNIFE.
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>>AH, A CLUE. A KNIFE, GOOD.
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WELL DONE.
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>>THANK YOU.
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>>BUT EVEN MORE IMPORTANTLY,
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THE MURDER MUST HAVE BEEN ONE
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OF THE PEOPLE IN--
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>>OH, IT WAS ME.
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>>I'M SORRY?
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"IT WAS ME".
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>>YOU MURDERED HIM?
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>>YEAH, THAT'S WHY I HAD THE
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KNIFE.
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>>UH, WHY?
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>>WHY?
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>>YEAH, WHY DID YOU MURDER HIM?
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>>DID YOU GET BACK TO ME?
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>>YOU MURDERED A GUY--
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WHAT'S THAT IN YOUR BACK?
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IS THAT A KNIFE STICKING OUT OF
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YOUR BACK?
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>>AH, YEAH, IT IS!
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>>WHO STABBED YOU?
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>>YEAH, WHO STABBED ME?
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>>WHO STABBED BARRY?
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YOU STABBED HIM, BELINDA?
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WHY? YOU DON'T KNOW.
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WHY WOULD YOU KNOW?
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DID ANYONE ELSE GET STABBED
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WHILE THE LIGHTS WERE OUT FOR
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4 SECONDS?
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>>RIGHT HERE.
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>>KEVIN?
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OKAY, WHO STABBED KEVIN?
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>>I STABBED MYSELF.
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>>WHY AM I NOT SURPRISED,
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YOU IDIOT.
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>>LET'S JUST CALM DOWN FOR A
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SECOND, OKAY, CLARK, YOU'RE
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DOIN' A GREAT JOB.
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>>HMM, YEAH, I THINK YOU'RE
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DOING WONDERFUL.
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>>SHUT UP, MAVIS.
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>>ALL RIGHT, LET'S JUST FIND
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OUT EXACTLY WHAT HAPPENED, ALL
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RIGHT? SO, CLARK, I'M GOING TO
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TAKE THAT KNIFE, OKAY, I'M GOING
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TO TAKE IT. SO MAVIS, WOULD YOU
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LIKE TO PLAY STANLEY?
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>>OH, A LITTLE ROLE-PLAY.
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HA-HA.
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>>THE LIGHTS WENT OUT, THEN I
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TOOK OUT MY KNIFE. AND THEN I
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JUST KIND OF...
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>>NO, MAVIS, STEP AWAY, DO NOT
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WALK TOWARDS THE KNIFE, MAVIS.
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NO!
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>>KEPT GOING IN... AND THEN
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STABBED HIM.
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>>NO, MAVIS! WHAT ARE YOU
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DOING?
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>>IT'S SOLVED.
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>>WHY WOULD YOU-- KEVIN, NO,
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KEVIN!
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>>I GUESS I'M BEING AN IDIOT.
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>>OH, MY GOD! EVERYONE STOP!
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YOU'VE BEEN AWFUL QUIET TONIGHT.
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YOU HIDING SOMETHING? NO. OF
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COURSE THERE ISN'T ANYTHING I
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SHOULD KNOW ABOUT. YEAH, THERE
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IT IS. LITTLE DAGGER. AND WHAT
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BETTER NIGHT TO BRING IT OUT
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THAN ON A NIGHT WHEN EVERYONE
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GETS STABBED. MAVIS IS DEAD,
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NOW, KEVIN IS DEAD. COOL. THIS
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WAS SUPPOSED TO BE A SPECIAL
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NIGHT FOR STANLEY, NOW HE'S
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DEAD. I EVEN RENTED HIM A FUN
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TRAINED STAG AS A JOKE.
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(DEER GAGGING)
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>>WHY IS IT MAKING THAT SOUND?
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(DEER GAGGING)
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>>WE FED HIM SOME... (MUMBLES)
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>>YOU FED HIM WHAT?
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>>WE FED HIM SOME... (MUMBLES)
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>>YEAH, ADD VOLUME TO THE WORD
155
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YOU'RE SAYING AT THE END, THERE.
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>>WE FED HIM SOME DAGGERS.
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>>YOU FED HIM SOME DAGGERS.
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>>YOU TWO STAY RIGHT THERE,
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'CAUSE I'M CALLIN' THE POLICE.
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YOU KNOW WHAT? I'M GOING TO
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CHECK THIS OUT FIRST. BECAUSE I
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HAVE A SNEAKING SUSPICION THAT
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YEAH, OKAY, THAT'S WHAT
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I THOUGHT.
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WHO STABBED THE STRIPPER?
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(DEER GAGGING)
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>>WHAT?
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WHY WOULD YOU DO THAT?
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>>WAIT, STOP.
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>>YOU DIDN'T LIKE THE STABBY
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MURDER MYSTERY?
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>>NO!
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>>BIG SOFTY. ALL RIGHT, FINE,
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LET'S TRY ANOTHER ONE. THIS
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ONE'S ABOUT BURGERS.
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>>ONE BURGER AND FRIES, PLEASE.
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WOW! THAT'S FAST!
178
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>>YOU THINK THAT'S FAST,
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YOU SHOULD CHECK OUT NICK JAYS.
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>>NICK JAYS FOOD IS SO FAST,
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YOU'LL ACTUALLY MEET YOURSELF
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COMING TO ORDER THE FOOD THAT
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YOU JUST ORDERED;
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IT'S THAT FAST.
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>>HI, CAN I? OOH THANKS,
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THAT'S FAST!
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>>YEAH, I WAS GOING TO GET
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SOME--
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>>NICK JAYS?
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>>YEAH.
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>>HERE YOU GO.
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>>THANKS.
193
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>>THAT'S FAST.
194
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>>NOW THERE'S TWO OF US IN THE
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UNIVERSE.
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>>CAN'T HAVE THAT.
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>>WHAT?
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>>SEE YA.
199
00:06:39,885 --> 00:06:40,385
>>OH GEEZ-- NO-NO-NO!
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(GUN SHOT)
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>>OH, MY GOD, OH MY GOD!
202
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OH, MY GOD!
203
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>>HEY!
204
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>>YOU'RE ME.
205
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>>YEAH, I WAS GOING TO GET
206
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SOME--
207
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>>NICK JAYS?
208
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>>YEAH.
209
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>>HERE YOU GO.
210
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>>THANKS!
211
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>>THAT'S FAST. NOW THERE'S TWO
212
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OF US IN THE UNIVERSE.
213
00:06:55,025 --> 00:06:55,067
>>I DON'T WANT TO KILL MYSELF.
214
00:06:55,776 --> 00:06:55,817
>>YOU GOT TO KILL YOURSELF.
215
00:06:56,485 --> 00:06:56,527
>>WELL, I DON'T WANT TO KILL
216
00:06:56,944 --> 00:06:56,985
MYSELF.
217
00:06:57,611 --> 00:06:57,653
>>YOU HAVE TO KILL YOURSELF.
218
00:06:58,028 --> 00:06:58,070
>>I'M NOT KILLING MYSELF.
219
00:06:58,403 --> 00:06:58,529
>>HEY!
220
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>>YOU'RE ME.
221
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>>YEAH. I WAS JUST GOING TO GET
222
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SOME--
223
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>>NICK JAYS.
224
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>>YEAH.
225
00:07:01,240 --> 00:07:01,280
>>HERE YOU GO.
226
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>>THANKS!
227
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>>THAT'S FAST.
228
00:07:03,200 --> 00:07:03,242
>>NOW THERE'S TWO OF US IN THE
229
00:07:03,492 --> 00:07:03,534
UNIVERSE.
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>>ACTUALLY, THERE'S THREE,
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THIS GUY WON'T KILL HIMSELF.
232
00:07:05,953 --> 00:07:06,537
>>WHAT? KILL YOURSELF, MAN.
233
00:07:07,496 --> 00:07:07,538
>>I DON'T WANT TO KILL MYSELF.
234
00:07:08,497 --> 00:07:08,539
>>YOU'VE GOT TO KILL YOURSELF.
235
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TAKE THE GUN, PUT IT IN YOUR
236
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MOUTH!
237
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>>I DON'T WANT TO DO THAT,
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OKAY?
239
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>>HEY, YOU'RE ME!
240
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I WAS JUST-- WHAT THE F--- IS
241
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GOING ON?
242
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>>I DON'T WANT TO KILL MYSELF!
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>>TAKE THE GUN AND PUT IT IN
244
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YOUR MOUTH.
245
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>>NO!
246
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>>YOU'RE HOLDING UP THE LINE.
247
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>>DUDE, WOULD YOU KILL
248
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YOURSELF?
249
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>>YOU KNOW WHAT? F---ING
250
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KILL YOURSELF!
251
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>>WHOA, WHOA, WHOA!
252
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(GUN SHOTS)
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>>F--- YOU, F--- YOU, F--- YOU!
254
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[â– â– ]
255
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â– NICK JAYSâ–
256
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â– IT'S TEMPORAL PARADOX FASTâ–
257
00:07:31,019 --> 00:07:31,270
â– IT'S SO FAST THAT WHEN YOU
258
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ORDER YOUR FOOD AT NICK JAYSâ–
259
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â– ON THE WAY OUT OF THE
260
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RESTAURANTâ–
261
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â– YOU'LL MEET YOURSELF COMING
262
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TO ORDER THE FOODâ–
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â– YOU JUST ORDEREDâ–
264
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â– NICK JAYSâ–
265
00:07:38,485 --> 00:07:38,694
â– DON'T FORGET
266
00:07:39,194 --> 00:07:40,571
TO KILL YOURSELFâ–
267
00:07:41,738 --> 00:07:43,031
TO KILL YOURSELFâ–
268
00:07:43,490 --> 00:07:43,574
â– DON'T FORGET
269
00:07:44,241 --> 00:07:44,408
TO KILL YOURSELFâ–
270
00:07:45,158 --> 00:07:45,409
â– KILL YOURSELF, KILL YOURSELF,
271
00:07:46,159 --> 00:07:46,577
KILL YOURSELF, KILL YOURSELFâ–
272
00:07:47,202 --> 00:07:48,412
â– KILL YOURSELFâ–
273
00:07:49,079 --> 00:07:51,248
>>THAT WASN'T A STORY.
274
00:07:51,748 --> 00:07:52,416
>>SURE IT WAS.
275
00:07:53,083 --> 00:07:53,375
>>NO, THAT WAS AN AD FOR
276
00:07:53,792 --> 00:07:54,418
BURGERS.
277
00:07:54,751 --> 00:07:55,377
>>HMM?
278
00:07:56,044 --> 00:07:56,878
>>YEAH. AND I DON'T SEE HOW
279
00:07:57,629 --> 00:07:58,714
THAT WOULD SELL ANYTHING EITHER.
280
00:07:59,381 --> 00:07:59,965
>>THERE YOU GO, IT WAS THE
281
00:08:00,632 --> 00:08:02,259
STORY OF AN UNSUCCESSFUL
282
00:08:02,759 --> 00:08:05,596
ADVERTISEMENT.
283
00:08:06,471 --> 00:08:07,306
PICNICFACE IS THE TOME OF ALL
284
00:08:07,681 --> 00:08:07,889
STORIES.
285
00:08:08,640 --> 00:08:09,308
WE'LL BE RIGHT BACK AFTER THESE
286
00:08:21,278 --> 00:08:22,738
[â– â– ]
287
00:08:23,405 --> 00:08:24,114
>>OH, ALL RIGHT, LET'S SEE.
288
00:08:24,865 --> 00:08:25,532
I'VE GOT ANOTHER ONE HERE THAT
289
00:08:26,325 --> 00:08:27,743
YOU'LL BOTH ENJOY; IT'S A STORY
290
00:08:28,201 --> 00:08:29,077
ABOUT PANTS.
291
00:08:29,453 --> 00:08:29,870
>>PANTS?
292
00:08:30,287 --> 00:08:30,912
>>PANTS!
293
00:08:31,580 --> 00:08:32,456
>>ARE THEY DANGEROUS PANTS?
294
00:08:33,206 --> 00:08:34,082
>>NO, THEY'RE-- YOU'RE SUCH A--
295
00:08:34,833 --> 00:08:36,293
NO, JU-- PANTS, OKAY? TAKE IT OR
296
00:08:37,002 --> 00:08:37,628
LEAVE IT. GOING ONCE, GOING
297
00:08:38,045 --> 00:08:38,086
TWICE...
298
00:08:38,629 --> 00:08:38,670
>>OKAY, WE'LL TAKE IT,
299
00:08:39,338 --> 00:08:39,630
WE'LL TAKE THE PANTS STORY.
300
00:08:40,213 --> 00:08:40,631
>>ALL RIGHT, SOLD!
301
00:08:41,590 --> 00:08:44,509
YOU'LL GET YOUR PANTS STORY.
302
00:08:45,260 --> 00:08:45,636
THIS STORY TAKES PLACE IN AN
303
00:08:46,219 --> 00:08:46,928
APARTMENT.
304
00:08:47,679 --> 00:08:48,138
>>HOW IS IT, LIKE AN ENCHANTED
305
00:08:48,764 --> 00:08:49,264
APARTMENT OR ANYTHING?
306
00:08:50,015 --> 00:08:51,600
>>IT'S JUST A NORMAL APARTMENT,
307
00:08:52,184 --> 00:08:53,268
YES. CAN I BEGIN?
308
00:08:53,810 --> 00:08:56,480
CAN I PLEASE BEGIN?
309
00:08:57,189 --> 00:08:58,482
THERE WAS A BUNCH OF DUDES
310
00:08:59,232 --> 00:09:00,484
HANGING OUT IN AN APARTMENT,
311
00:09:01,276 --> 00:09:02,653
HAVING A VERY CIVIL DISCUSSION
312
00:09:03,320 --> 00:09:04,613
ABOUT PANTS.
313
00:09:05,364 --> 00:09:05,656
>>OH, I GOT ONE. ONE TIME, MY
314
00:09:06,490 --> 00:09:07,407
GIRLFRIEND ASKED ME IF HER PANTS
315
00:09:07,991 --> 00:09:09,326
MADE HER LOOK FAT...
316
00:09:09,868 --> 00:09:10,577
>>WHAT DID YOU SAY?
317
00:09:11,370 --> 00:09:12,371
>>I SAID "NO", BUT WHAT I REALLY
318
00:09:12,954 --> 00:09:14,206
MEANT WAS "SORT OF".
319
00:09:14,623 --> 00:09:15,624
(LAUGHING)
320
00:09:16,041 --> 00:09:16,583
>>NICE!
321
00:09:16,958 --> 00:09:17,501
>>OOH!
322
00:09:17,959 --> 00:09:18,585
(LAUGHING)
323
00:09:18,960 --> 00:09:20,045
>>NICE!
324
00:09:20,462 --> 00:09:20,879
>>OH, YEAH.
325
00:09:21,213 --> 00:09:24,091
>>YES!
326
00:09:24,800 --> 00:09:25,384
>>OH, I REMEMBER HER LOOKING
327
00:09:26,093 --> 00:09:27,010
SORT OF FAT IN THOSE PANTS.
328
00:09:27,678 --> 00:09:28,136
>>THAT WAS A SHAME, BECAUSE
329
00:09:28,762 --> 00:09:29,262
THOSE WERE NICE PANTS.
330
00:09:29,930 --> 00:09:30,389
>>THOSE WERE NICE PANTS.
331
00:09:31,098 --> 00:09:31,139
>>THIS ONE TIME I WAS SEEING
332
00:09:31,848 --> 00:09:32,683
THIS GIRL, RIGHT? AND I TOLD HER
333
00:09:33,600 --> 00:09:33,809
THAT I WAS REALLY INTO HER, BUT
334
00:09:34,559 --> 00:09:34,893
I REALLY WASN'T INTO HER, I JUST
335
00:09:35,644 --> 00:09:35,894
LIED TO HER SO THAT I COULD GET
336
00:09:36,353 --> 00:09:42,275
INTO HER PANTS.
337
00:09:42,984 --> 00:09:43,110
AND THEN AFTER I BORROWED HER
338
00:09:43,860 --> 00:09:44,695
PANTS, I F---IN' DUMPED HER.
339
00:09:45,153 --> 00:09:45,654
>>YES!
340
00:09:46,113 --> 00:09:46,655
>>OH, YEAH!
341
00:09:47,114 --> 00:09:49,032
(LAUGHING)
342
00:09:49,491 --> 00:09:50,492
>>WHAT'S UP?
343
00:09:50,867 --> 00:09:52,703
>>WOW!
344
00:09:53,453 --> 00:09:55,539
>>PRETTY COOL, EH?
345
00:09:56,164 --> 00:09:56,540
ONE OF THESE, YUP.
346
00:09:57,290 --> 00:09:58,709
>>WHERE DID YOU PICK UP THOSE?
347
00:09:59,584 --> 00:10:00,711
>>UH, YOU KNOW, I GUILTED MY
348
00:10:01,420 --> 00:10:01,712
GIRLFRIEND OUT OF THEM.
349
00:10:02,421 --> 00:10:03,004
>>YOU'RE BEAUTIFUL.
350
00:10:03,630 --> 00:10:04,631
>>THOSE ARE NICE PANTS.
351
00:10:05,298 --> 00:10:05,716
>>I LOVE LADIES' PANTS.
352
00:10:06,258 --> 00:10:06,508
>>PANTS.
353
00:10:06,883 --> 00:10:06,925
>>PANTS.
354
00:10:07,342 --> 00:10:07,592
>>PANTS.
355
00:10:08,009 --> 00:10:08,051
>>PANTS.
356
00:10:08,427 --> 00:10:08,719
>>PANTS.
357
00:10:09,469 --> 00:10:10,053
â– I LIKE LADIES PANTS, YES!â–
358
00:10:10,637 --> 00:10:11,722
â– I LIKE LADIES PANTSâ–
359
00:10:12,597 --> 00:10:13,598
â– I LIKE LADIES PANTS, YES!â–
360
00:10:14,224 --> 00:10:15,559
â– I LIKE LADIES PANTSâ–
361
00:10:16,184 --> 00:10:17,519
â– DO YOU WANT MY PANTS?â–
362
00:10:18,103 --> 00:10:18,729
â– OH YES, I DO GIRL!â–
363
00:10:19,396 --> 00:10:20,731
â– DO YOU WANT MY PANTS?â–
364
00:10:21,314 --> 00:10:22,107
â– ON MY LOWER BODâ–
365
00:10:22,858 --> 00:10:26,194
â– DO YOU WANT MY PA-HA-HA-ANTS?â–
366
00:10:29,531 --> 00:10:31,950
[â– â– ]
367
00:10:32,534 --> 00:10:33,744
â– I NOW PRONOUNCE YOU,
368
00:10:34,411 --> 00:10:38,749
MAN AND LADIES PANTSâ–
369
00:10:39,499 --> 00:10:41,126
>>THOSE ARE SOME GREAT PANTS.
370
00:10:41,752 --> 00:10:42,919
â– DO YOU WANT MY PANTS?â–
371
00:10:43,587 --> 00:10:44,546
â– I DON'T WANT DUDE PANTSâ–
372
00:10:45,297 --> 00:10:47,966
â– DO YOU WANT MY PA-HA-HA-ANTS?â–
373
00:10:48,592 --> 00:10:48,759
â– I'M WILLING TO TAKE THEM
374
00:10:49,342 --> 00:10:50,594
BY FORCEâ–
375
00:10:51,344 --> 00:10:51,553
>>I'M GOING TO RIP THOSE PANTS
376
00:10:52,262 --> 00:10:52,554
OFF YOUR BODY GIRL. I'LL TAKE
377
00:10:53,096 --> 00:10:53,597
THEM FOR MYSELF.
378
00:10:54,347 --> 00:10:54,431
>>OKAY, GET HER OUT OF HERE.
379
00:10:54,931 --> 00:10:54,973
GRAB HER PANTS.
380
00:10:55,265 --> 00:10:55,599
>>NO!
381
00:10:56,391 --> 00:10:56,600
>>GET THOSE PANTS OFF. IF YOU'RE
382
00:10:57,309 --> 00:10:57,601
SITTING WITH A WOMAN AT HOME,
383
00:10:58,351 --> 00:10:58,727
GRAB THOSE PANTS. WE'RE GETTING
384
00:10:59,478 --> 00:11:00,145
ALL THE PANTS INTO MOVEMENT!
385
00:11:02,063 --> 00:11:09,362
[â– â– ]
386
00:11:10,113 --> 00:11:10,572
>>SO THERE YOU GO, YOU GOT YOUR
387
00:11:11,323 --> 00:11:12,824
PANTS STORY. ARE YOU HAPPY NOW?
388
00:11:13,575 --> 00:11:14,451
OH, YOU KIDS DON'T KNOW ANYTHING
389
00:11:15,202 --> 00:11:16,328
ABOUT STORIES ANYWAYS, WITH YOUR
390
00:11:17,078 --> 00:11:20,248
VIDEO GAMES AND YOUR TV GAMES.
391
00:11:20,999 --> 00:11:22,667
BACK IN MY DAY, TELEVISION WAS
392
00:11:23,210 --> 00:11:24,044
CALLED "BOOKS".
393
00:11:24,711 --> 00:11:26,254
>>WHY? THAT'S CONFUSING.
394
00:11:26,963 --> 00:11:27,506
>>YEAH, WOULDN'T BOOKS HAVE
395
00:11:28,089 --> 00:11:28,840
BEEN CALLED "BOOKS".
396
00:11:29,591 --> 00:11:30,008
>>VERY FUNNY. YOU GUYS WANT ME
397
00:11:30,717 --> 00:11:31,301
TO READ ANOTHER BOOK? 'CAUSE
398
00:11:32,052 --> 00:11:32,385
I'VE GOT A GOT A HARDCOVER BACK
399
00:11:33,053 --> 00:11:33,386
HERE, IT'S CALLED "A SWIFT
400
00:11:34,137 --> 00:11:35,847
BEATING WITH A HARD COVER BOOK".
401
00:11:36,348 --> 00:11:37,349
>>SORRY, GRANDPA.
402
00:11:37,974 --> 00:11:39,059
>>THAT'S MORE LIKE IT.
403
00:11:39,768 --> 00:11:40,811
NOW, MAY I PROCEED OR WOULD
404
00:11:41,686 --> 00:11:42,521
YOU TWO RATHER DRIVE YOUR
405
00:11:43,271 --> 00:11:46,358
GRANDFATHER TO AN EARLY GRAVE?
406
00:11:46,817 --> 00:11:47,275
>>KEEP GOING.
407
00:11:48,026 --> 00:11:48,151
>>YOU CAN KEEP GOING I GUESS.
408
00:11:48,902 --> 00:11:49,820
>>I NOTICED YOUR HESITATION AND
409
00:11:50,737 --> 00:11:52,113
I DIDN'T LIKE IT. THIS NEXT
410
00:11:52,823 --> 00:11:53,657
STORY BEGINS WITH A GROUP OF
411
00:11:54,449 --> 00:11:56,034
YOUNG DUDES GATHERED AT A PATIO
412
00:11:56,493 --> 00:11:57,869
BAR AND GRILL.
413
00:11:58,620 --> 00:12:00,080
>>HEY, TO MILLER. THE BEST DAMN
414
00:12:00,747 --> 00:12:01,623
FRIEND A GUY COULD ASK FOR.
415
00:12:02,082 --> 00:12:04,835
>>HEAR, HEAR.
416
00:12:05,794 --> 00:12:09,422
>>CHUG, CHUG, CHUG, CHUG, CHUG,
417
00:12:10,173 --> 00:12:11,299
CHUG, CHUG, CHUG, CHUG, CHUG,
418
00:12:12,008 --> 00:12:12,968
CHUG, CHUG, CHUG, CHUG, CHUG,
419
00:12:13,593 --> 00:12:15,262
CHUG, CHUG, CHUG, CHUG!
420
00:12:15,637 --> 00:12:16,638
>>YEAH!
421
00:12:17,138 --> 00:12:17,180
>>THAT WAS GREAT.
422
00:12:17,764 --> 00:12:19,432
>>OH, THANKS, I NEEDED THAT.
423
00:12:20,100 --> 00:12:21,977
>>FIGHT, FIGHT, FIGHT...
424
00:12:22,352 --> 00:12:23,019
>>WHAT?
425
00:12:23,728 --> 00:12:24,896
>>FIGHT, FIGHT, FIGHT, FIGHT,
426
00:12:25,605 --> 00:12:25,730
FIGHT, FIGHT, FIGHT, FIGHT,
427
00:12:26,481 --> 00:12:26,857
>>I DON'T WANT TO FIGHT YOU.
428
00:12:28,441 --> 00:12:29,276
FIGHT, FIGHT, FIGHT, FIGHT!
429
00:12:29,609 --> 00:12:31,361
>>YEAH!
430
00:12:32,112 --> 00:12:34,447
>>SALT, SALT, SALT, SALT, SALT,
431
00:12:35,073 --> 00:12:36,366
SALT, SALT, SALT, SALT!
432
00:12:40,287 --> 00:12:45,750
[â– â– ]
433
00:12:46,459 --> 00:12:47,878
>>STOP, WE HAVE TO STOP.
434
00:12:48,503 --> 00:12:49,254
>>OH, WHAT?
435
00:12:50,005 --> 00:12:50,297
>>JUST, IT REALLY SEEMS LIKE
436
00:12:51,047 --> 00:12:51,631
EVERY STORY IN THIS BOOK BEGINS
437
00:12:52,382 --> 00:12:53,425
WITH A GROUP OF YOUNG DUDES.
438
00:12:54,134 --> 00:12:54,885
>>AT LEAST HALF OF THEM IS A
439
00:12:55,677 --> 00:12:56,303
GROUP OF YOUNG DUDES.
440
00:12:57,012 --> 00:12:57,429
>>NOT ONE OF THEM STARTS WITH
441
00:12:58,013 --> 00:12:58,638
"ONCE UPON A TIME"?
442
00:12:59,306 --> 00:12:59,973
>>WELL, ONCE UPON A TIME, A
443
00:13:00,640 --> 00:13:01,600
GROUP OF YOUNG DUDES, ETC,
444
00:13:02,183 --> 00:13:02,601
ETC... IT SAYS IN THE
445
00:13:03,310 --> 00:13:04,519
BIBLIOGRAPHY HERE THAT IT WAS
446
00:13:05,270 --> 00:13:06,521
WRITTEN IN LARGE PART BY A GROUP
447
00:13:06,980 --> 00:13:10,525
OF YOUNG DUDES.
448
00:13:11,192 --> 00:13:12,152
>>MORE STORIES ABOUT YOUNG
449
00:13:12,736 --> 00:13:13,904
DUDES WHEN WE RETURN,
450
00:13:27,417 --> 00:13:28,543
[â– â– ]
451
00:13:29,252 --> 00:13:30,295
>>THIS NEXT STORY BEGINS WITH
452
00:13:31,046 --> 00:13:32,631
THREE YOUNG DUDES APPROACHING A
453
00:13:33,089 --> 00:13:33,506
HAUNTED HOUSE.
454
00:13:34,090 --> 00:13:34,591
>>ARE YOU KIDDING ME?
455
00:13:35,216 --> 00:13:35,550
>>THE HAUNTED HOUSE WAS
456
00:13:36,259 --> 00:13:36,927
TERRIFYING AND THEY NEEDED TO
457
00:13:37,886 --> 00:13:39,346
HAVE A MEANS TO DECIDE WHO GOES
458
00:13:41,431 --> 00:13:43,725
[â– â– ]
459
00:13:44,142 --> 00:13:45,435
>>HO-HO-HO!
460
00:13:46,144 --> 00:13:46,561
>>I GUESS WE'LL JUST HAVE TO
461
00:13:47,228 --> 00:13:48,021
INKY-PINKY-PONKY FOR IT.
462
00:13:48,772 --> 00:13:49,522
>>ALL RIGHT, DO IT UP, MATT.
463
00:13:49,981 --> 00:13:51,149
>>ALL RIGHT.
464
00:13:51,816 --> 00:13:53,985
>>INKY, PINKY, PONKY, DADDY
465
00:13:54,527 --> 00:13:56,154
BOUGHT A DONKEY...
466
00:13:56,613 --> 00:13:57,280
>>WHAT'S UP?
467
00:13:58,031 --> 00:13:58,365
>>DON'T YOU KNOW ABOUT BRAD'S
468
00:13:58,698 --> 00:13:59,783
DAD?
469
00:14:00,533 --> 00:14:01,534
>>WHAT HAPPENED TO YOUR DAD?
470
00:14:02,118 --> 00:14:02,702
>>I DON'T HAVE ONE.
471
00:14:03,453 --> 00:14:05,455
>>HIS DAD LEFT HIM AND HIS MOM.
472
00:14:06,081 --> 00:14:07,832
>>I'M SUPER-SORRY, MAN.
473
00:14:08,583 --> 00:14:09,709
>>THANKS, THAT MEANS A LOT.
474
00:14:10,460 --> 00:14:11,294
>>YOU KNOW, WHAT? JUST HAVE THE
475
00:14:11,670 --> 00:14:13,004
PIZZA.
476
00:14:13,755 --> 00:14:14,214
>>I DON'T WANT TO WIN THE PIZZA
477
00:14:14,631 --> 00:14:15,298
LIKE THAT.
478
00:14:15,924 --> 00:14:17,217
>>YEAH, FOR SURE. UM...
479
00:14:17,884 --> 00:14:18,593
I'LL CHANGE IT TO "MOMMY".
480
00:14:19,094 --> 00:14:19,803
>>I HAVE A MOMMY.
481
00:14:20,220 --> 00:14:21,304
>>OKAY.
482
00:14:21,846 --> 00:14:23,181
>>NO WORRIES, OKAY.
483
00:14:23,890 --> 00:14:25,976
>>INKY, PINKY, PONKY, MOMMY
484
00:14:26,726 --> 00:14:29,187
BOUGHT A DONKEY...
485
00:14:29,646 --> 00:14:32,816
>>OH, GOD...
486
00:14:33,483 --> 00:14:35,193
>>DONKEY? DID SOMETHING--
487
00:14:35,944 --> 00:14:36,736
>>I DON'T HAVE A DONKEY, THANK
488
00:14:37,195 --> 00:14:37,612
YOU VERY MUCH.
489
00:14:38,238 --> 00:14:38,571
>>MOST PEOPLE DON'T HAVE
490
00:14:38,947 --> 00:14:39,239
DONKEYS.
491
00:14:39,990 --> 00:14:40,323
>>HIS MOM CAN'T AFFORD TO BUY A
492
00:14:40,991 --> 00:14:42,826
DONKEY SINCE HIS DAD LEFT.
493
00:14:43,576 --> 00:14:44,327
>>WE CAN PLAY A DIFFERENT GAME.
494
00:14:44,619 --> 00:14:46,538
>>NO.
495
00:14:47,205 --> 00:14:48,206
>>WE'RE PLAYING THIS GAME.
496
00:14:48,957 --> 00:14:49,332
>>HE DOESN'T WANT YOUR PITY.
497
00:14:50,083 --> 00:14:50,542
OKAY, IF HE'S GOING TO WIN THIS
498
00:14:51,292 --> 00:14:55,588
PIZZA, HE'S GONNA WIN IT FAIRLY.
499
00:14:56,339 --> 00:14:57,882
>>OKAY, ALL RIGHT, I'LL MAKE IT
500
00:14:58,258 --> 00:14:59,551
"FORK".
501
00:14:59,884 --> 00:15:01,094
>>OKAY.
502
00:15:01,553 --> 00:15:03,138
>>OKAY, FORK.
503
00:15:03,513 --> 00:15:04,389
>>GOOD.
504
00:15:05,056 --> 00:15:08,143
>>INKY, PINKY, PONKY, MOMMY
505
00:15:08,643 --> 00:15:09,686
BOUGHT A FORK...
506
00:15:10,145 --> 00:15:11,187
>>THANK YOU.
507
00:15:11,646 --> 00:15:12,605
>>FORK DIED.
508
00:15:13,106 --> 00:15:14,024
>>JESUS CHRIST!
509
00:15:14,566 --> 00:15:15,525
>>MY GOD!
510
00:15:16,026 --> 00:15:16,109
>>WHAT? FORKS?
511
00:15:16,818 --> 00:15:18,570
>>WHEN HIS DAD LEFT, HE TOOK
512
00:15:19,320 --> 00:15:20,113
THEIR COLLECTION OF ANTIQUE DEAD
513
00:15:20,613 --> 00:15:21,865
FORKS. MATT, GOD!
514
00:15:22,532 --> 00:15:23,283
>>HE TOOK ALL OF THEM.
515
00:15:24,034 --> 00:15:25,035
>>THIS DOESN'T MAKE ANY SENSE!
516
00:15:25,952 --> 00:15:26,036
>>SOMETIMES LIFE DOESN'T MAKE
517
00:15:26,661 --> 00:15:26,786
ANY SENSE.
518
00:15:27,454 --> 00:15:27,787
>>NONE OF THIS MAKES SENSE.
519
00:15:28,538 --> 00:15:29,414
WE'RE IN AN INDUSTRIAL KITCHEN.
520
00:15:30,040 --> 00:15:30,498
WE'RE SUPPOSED TO GO TO A
521
00:15:30,999 --> 00:15:31,416
HAUNTED MANSION.
522
00:15:32,167 --> 00:15:32,500
>>WELL, WHEN HIS DAD LEFT, HE
523
00:15:33,168 --> 00:15:33,543
TOOK THE GHOSTS FROM THE
524
00:15:33,918 --> 00:15:34,210
MANSION.
525
00:15:34,961 --> 00:15:35,503
>>OH, SHUT UP! OKAY? AND WHY
526
00:15:36,254 --> 00:15:37,505
ARE WE DRESSED LIKE THIS? WHAT--
527
00:15:38,256 --> 00:15:39,174
WE LOOK LIKE 8-YEAR-OLDS. THIS
528
00:15:39,799 --> 00:15:40,717
IS WAY TOO SMALL FOR ME.
529
00:15:41,468 --> 00:15:41,843
>>YOU KNEW THE UNIFORM WHEN YOU
530
00:15:42,343 --> 00:15:42,886
SIGNED UP FOR THE
531
00:15:43,470 --> 00:15:44,262
"HOODIE CAP GANG".
532
00:15:45,013 --> 00:15:45,805
>>AND WHAT'S THIS GIRL DOING
533
00:15:46,556 --> 00:15:46,848
HERE? IT'S SUPPOSED TO BE YOU,
534
00:15:47,557 --> 00:15:49,059
ME AND A DUDE. THREE DUDES
535
00:15:50,018 --> 00:15:50,894
GOING TO A HAUNTED MANSION. AND
536
00:15:51,686 --> 00:15:52,187
WHY DID YOU BRING ONE PIECE OF
537
00:15:52,729 --> 00:15:54,189
PIZZA? I'M HUNGRY!
538
00:15:54,939 --> 00:15:56,357
>>NO, ENOUGH. I CAN'T DO THIS.
539
00:15:56,983 --> 00:15:57,901
>>WHAT IS IT THIS TIME?
540
00:15:58,485 --> 00:16:00,070
>>THAT STORY WAS...
541
00:16:00,737 --> 00:16:01,071
BARELY A STORY.
542
00:16:01,863 --> 00:16:02,739
>>IT'S A FINE STORY.
543
00:16:03,406 --> 00:16:03,865
>>OKAY, WHAT'S THE PREMISE?
544
00:16:04,616 --> 00:16:05,492
>>THE PREMISE IS, IS THAT IN
545
00:16:06,159 --> 00:16:07,452
ORDER TO MAKE A DECISION, 3
546
00:16:08,203 --> 00:16:09,454
DUDES HAVE TO EMPLOY A CLASSIC
547
00:16:10,205 --> 00:16:11,831
RHYMING GAME. YOU'RE LOOKIN' AT
548
00:16:12,582 --> 00:16:13,333
ME WITH THESE DEAD EYES AND I
549
00:16:14,000 --> 00:16:14,626
FEEL LIKE I'M TELLIN' A HOT
550
00:16:15,376 --> 00:16:16,336
STORY FROM A HOT TOME RIGHT NOW
551
00:16:17,087 --> 00:16:17,921
AND I'M NOT GETTING ANY GOD DAMN
552
00:16:18,671 --> 00:16:19,089
RESPECT OUT OF YOU TWO LITTLE
553
00:16:19,631 --> 00:16:19,839
TURDS.
554
00:16:20,507 --> 00:16:20,840
>>SEEMS LIKE YOU'RE REALLY
555
00:16:21,424 --> 00:16:21,674
GRABBING AT STRAWS.
556
00:16:22,425 --> 00:16:22,926
>>I AM NOT GRASPING AT STRAWS!
557
00:16:23,551 --> 00:16:24,803
THAT STORY WAS A HIT.
558
00:16:25,553 --> 00:16:25,804
>>EVEN I THOUGHT IT WAS KIND OF
559
00:16:26,137 --> 00:16:26,638
DUMB.
560
00:16:27,347 --> 00:16:27,847
>>EVEN HE THOUGHT IT WAS KIND
561
00:16:28,264 --> 00:16:28,389
OF DUMB.
562
00:16:29,057 --> 00:16:29,516
>>WELL, WHAT DOES HE KNOW?
563
00:16:30,141 --> 00:16:30,558
HE'S JUST A BIG FAT BOZO.
564
00:16:31,267 --> 00:16:32,811
>>YOU KNOW, GIVEN THE OPTION,
565
00:16:33,561 --> 00:16:33,770
I THINK I'D RATHER GO BACK AND
566
00:16:34,437 --> 00:16:34,729
LOOK AT SOME OF THE EARLIER
567
00:16:35,146 --> 00:16:35,605
STORIES.
568
00:16:36,272 --> 00:16:37,107
>>NO! YOU MUST NOT DO THAT,
569
00:16:37,982 --> 00:16:38,274
THAT IS THE ONE RULE OF THE
570
00:16:38,608 --> 00:16:38,942
TOME.
571
00:16:39,734 --> 00:16:39,943
>>BUT IT'S EASY, WE JUST HAVE
572
00:16:40,527 --> 00:16:40,777
TO FLIP THE PAGES.
573
00:16:41,486 --> 00:16:41,736
>>OH, PLEASE DON'T DO THAT!
574
00:16:42,445 --> 00:16:42,695
CHILDREN, CHILDREN, DO NOT DO
575
00:16:43,279 --> 00:16:45,782
THAT, CHILDREN, NO!
576
00:16:46,241 --> 00:16:49,160
>>AH, WELL...
577
00:16:49,661 --> 00:16:52,288
>>WHERE ARE WE?
578
00:16:52,872 --> 00:16:54,624
>>WE'RE IN THE STORY.
579
00:16:55,166 --> 00:16:55,667
>>HEY, YOU'RE ME!
580
00:16:56,417 --> 00:16:56,709
>>YEAH, I WAS JUST GOING TO GET
581
00:16:57,085 --> 00:16:57,377
SOME--
582
00:16:57,836 --> 00:16:58,169
>>NICK JAYS.
583
00:16:58,503 --> 00:16:59,129
>>YEAH.
584
00:16:59,629 --> 00:16:59,921
>>HERE YOU GO.
585
00:17:00,296 --> 00:17:00,964
>>THANKS!
586
00:17:01,756 --> 00:17:01,965
>>THAT'S-- WHOA, WHOA, WHOA,
587
00:17:02,632 --> 00:17:02,841
WHOA! BE CAREFUL WITH THAT,
588
00:17:03,299 --> 00:17:03,466
LITTLE GIRL.
589
00:17:03,925 --> 00:17:04,425
>>WHAT? WHY?
590
00:17:05,135 --> 00:17:09,597
>>JUST TELL US WHAT YOU WANT.
591
00:17:10,223 --> 00:17:11,683
>>I WANT THOSE BURGERS.
592
00:17:12,225 --> 00:17:15,603
>>THESE BURGERS?
593
00:17:15,937 --> 00:17:17,897
>>YEAH!
594
00:17:18,356 --> 00:17:19,190
>>I'M SO SORRY.
595
00:17:19,816 --> 00:17:20,483
>>THANKS FOR THE BURGERS.
596
00:17:20,817 --> 00:17:23,945
>>BYE.
597
00:17:24,696 --> 00:17:24,863
>>AND THEN, AFTER I BORROWED
598
00:17:25,613 --> 00:17:26,573
HER PANTS, I F---IN' DUMPED HER.
599
00:17:26,948 --> 00:17:27,532
>>YEAH!
600
00:17:27,949 --> 00:17:28,992
>>OH, YEAH!
601
00:17:29,492 --> 00:17:30,285
>>THAT'S MEAN.
602
00:17:30,869 --> 00:17:31,578
>>WHOA, WHO ARE YOU?
603
00:17:31,995 --> 00:17:33,246
>>WHO AM I?
604
00:17:33,830 --> 00:17:34,247
WHO THE F--- ARE YOU?
605
00:17:34,664 --> 00:17:35,331
(SCREAMING)
606
00:17:36,040 --> 00:17:36,833
>>WHOA, WHOA EVERYBODY, JUST
607
00:17:37,584 --> 00:17:37,876
CALM DOWN. LET'S JUST FIND OUT
608
00:17:38,459 --> 00:17:38,877
WHAT THIS GIRL WANTS.
609
00:17:39,294 --> 00:17:41,337
>>SANDY...
610
00:17:41,880 --> 00:17:44,174
NICE PANTS, BRO.
611
00:17:44,757 --> 00:17:45,341
>>YEAH, THANKS.
612
00:17:45,967 --> 00:17:48,636
OKAY, WHAT DO YOU WANT?
613
00:17:49,220 --> 00:17:54,475
>>I WANT YOUR PANTS.
614
00:17:54,809 --> 00:17:57,478
>>NO.
615
00:17:57,854 --> 00:18:04,569
>>NO...
616
00:18:04,903 --> 00:18:06,905
>>COOL.
617
00:18:07,572 --> 00:18:09,365
NOW LET'S GET OUT OF HERE.
618
00:18:10,033 --> 00:18:12,076
>>I'M REALLY SORRY. BYE.
619
00:18:12,660 --> 00:18:16,831
>>SEE YA, JERKS.
620
00:18:17,582 --> 00:18:18,917
>>I DON'T RECOGNIZE THIS STORY.
621
00:18:19,375 --> 00:18:20,084
>>ME NEITHER.
622
00:18:20,627 --> 00:18:21,294
>>WHERE ARE WE?
623
00:18:21,794 --> 00:18:22,503
>>I DON'T KNOW.
624
00:18:23,213 --> 00:18:24,047
>>ARE YOU GUYS BACKGROUND?
625
00:18:24,505 --> 00:18:25,673
>>WE'RE KIDS.
626
00:18:26,341 --> 00:18:28,384
>>SWEET, MUFFIN. HEH-HEH!
627
00:18:28,968 --> 00:18:29,677
HEY, NICE PANTS, KID.
628
00:18:30,386 --> 00:18:31,554
>>OH, THANKS, THEY'RE NEW.
629
00:18:32,055 --> 00:18:33,223
>>PRETTY AWESOME.
630
00:18:34,057 --> 00:18:36,351
OH, MAN, I NEEDED THIS.
631
00:18:37,018 --> 00:18:40,063
>>HEY, GIVE ME THAT MUFFIN.
632
00:18:40,647 --> 00:18:41,648
>>NO, I'M EATING IT.
633
00:18:42,398 --> 00:18:44,234
>>PLEASE GIVE HER THAT MUFFIN.
634
00:18:45,193 --> 00:18:46,110
>>THERE'S A BOWL FULL OF 'EM.
635
00:18:46,778 --> 00:18:47,570
>>BUT I WANT THAT ONE.
636
00:18:48,321 --> 00:18:48,780
>>BUT YOU CAN'T HAVE IT, 'CAUSE
637
00:18:49,280 --> 00:18:51,991
I'M EATING IT.
638
00:18:52,617 --> 00:18:53,034
>>GIVE ME YOUR MUFFIN.
639
00:18:53,701 --> 00:18:54,077
>>WHOA, WHOA, WHOA, WHOA!
640
00:18:54,535 --> 00:18:56,955
(GUNSHOT)
641
00:18:57,330 --> 00:18:58,873
(GASPING)
642
00:18:59,374 --> 00:19:01,125
>>YOU SHOT ME.
643
00:19:01,542 --> 00:19:02,710
>>COOL!
644
00:19:03,378 --> 00:19:04,921
>>OH, MY GOD, YOU SHOT HIM.
645
00:19:05,380 --> 00:19:08,424
>>BRIAN? BRIAN!
646
00:19:09,008 --> 00:19:10,260
WHAT DID YOU KIDS DO?
647
00:19:10,843 --> 00:19:12,845
>>HELLO?
648
00:19:13,429 --> 00:19:16,766
>>IS ANYBODY THERE?
649
00:19:17,475 --> 00:19:18,559
>>YOU HAVE REACHED THE END OF
650
00:19:19,310 --> 00:19:21,271
OF ALL STORIES. ALL THAT IS LEFT
651
00:19:22,146 --> 00:19:23,231
IS A TALE OF A GRANDFATHER
652
00:19:24,023 --> 00:19:25,608
READING TO HIS GRANDKIDS ABOUT
653
00:19:26,317 --> 00:19:27,277
THE ROOM OF THE YOUNG DUDES.
654
00:19:27,944 --> 00:19:29,112
(EVIL LAUGH)
655
00:19:44,085 --> 00:19:47,171
[â– â– ]
656
00:19:47,880 --> 00:19:48,131
>>DID YOU DO THE PREMIUM
657
00:19:48,673 --> 00:19:49,048
MEMBERSHIP THING?
658
00:19:49,590 --> 00:19:49,882
>>YEAH, I THINK SO.
659
00:19:50,300 --> 00:19:50,883
(GUNSHOT)
660
00:19:51,384 --> 00:19:51,843
>>WHAT WAS THAT?
661
00:19:52,302 --> 00:19:57,140
>>BRIAN? BRIAN!
662
00:19:57,765 --> 00:19:58,891
WHAT DID YOU KIDS DO?
663
00:19:59,642 --> 00:20:01,060
>>MARK, DID YOU SEE THOSE KIDS?
664
00:20:01,394 --> 00:20:02,020
>>NO.
665
00:20:02,770 --> 00:20:02,895
>>THEY JUST-- THEY WERE THERE
666
00:20:03,563 --> 00:20:03,980
AND THEY JUST DISAPPEARED!
667
00:20:04,522 --> 00:20:05,356
>>I DIDN'T SEE 'EM.
668
00:20:06,065 --> 00:20:06,733
>>I THINK THEY SHOT BRIAN.
669
00:20:07,400 --> 00:20:09,193
OH, MY GOD, BRIAN? BRIAN!
670
00:20:09,694 --> 00:20:11,029
>>IS HE OKAY?
671
00:20:11,487 --> 00:20:12,155
>>HE'S DEAD.
672
00:20:12,530 --> 00:20:14,574
>>OH...
673
00:20:15,116 --> 00:20:17,035
>>OH, MY GOD. OKAY.
674
00:20:17,785 --> 00:20:18,536
>>WELL, LET'S SHOOT MY WEEKEND
675
00:20:19,078 --> 00:20:21,622
AT BERNIE'S SKETCH.
676
00:20:22,248 --> 00:20:24,042
>>BRIAN IS DEAD, MARK.
677
00:20:24,751 --> 00:20:25,418
>>YEAH, AND WE'VE ONLY GOT
678
00:20:26,127 --> 00:20:26,502
LIKE, 20 MINUTES LEFT ON THIS
679
00:20:27,253 --> 00:20:28,129
GREEN SCREEN. CREW'S ALL HERE.
680
00:20:28,880 --> 00:20:30,173
LET'S SHOOT THE SKETCH. NOBODY
681
00:20:30,923 --> 00:20:31,424
CALLS 9-1-1 UNTIL WE'VE SHOT THE
682
00:20:32,175 --> 00:20:33,051
SKETCH, THEN WE CAN MAKE ALL THE
683
00:20:33,801 --> 00:20:36,721
CALLS WE WANT. OKAY, 20 MINUTES?
684
00:20:37,472 --> 00:20:39,515
>>OKAY, UH, FINE. UH, WHY DON'T
685
00:20:40,266 --> 00:20:40,641
YOU GUYS JUST SWITCH CHARACTERS?
686
00:20:41,267 --> 00:20:41,726
BRIAN CAN PLAY BERNIE--
687
00:20:42,435 --> 00:20:42,894
>>NO, NO, NO... I WROTE THIS
688
00:20:43,644 --> 00:20:44,729
SKETCH, I'M BERNIE. YOU TWO ARE
689
00:20:45,146 --> 00:20:45,730
THE TEENS.
690
00:20:46,397 --> 00:20:47,065
>>BRIAN IS DEAD. CAN WE AT
691
00:20:47,815 --> 00:20:48,399
LEAST MAYBE SWITCH HIM OUT WITH
692
00:20:49,150 --> 00:20:49,692
ANOTHER PICNICFACE MEMBER WHO'S
693
00:20:50,068 --> 00:20:50,443
ALIVE?
694
00:20:51,110 --> 00:20:51,652
>>NO! BRIAN WANTED TO BE IN
695
00:20:52,403 --> 00:20:53,780
THIS SKETCH, HE'S IN THE SKETCH!
696
00:20:54,405 --> 00:20:54,947
YOU TWO ARE THE TEENS,
697
00:20:58,868 --> 00:21:02,246
[â– â– ]
698
00:21:03,039 --> 00:21:04,415
>>AND SO, ANDY TRIED TO LIFT UP
699
00:21:05,166 --> 00:21:06,834
BRIAN AND BERNIE. BUT-- I DON'T
700
00:21:07,543 --> 00:21:08,252
EVEN KNOW WHO I'M TALKING TO
701
00:21:09,003 --> 00:21:10,380
ANYMORE. YOU KIDS ARE GONE,
702
00:21:10,963 --> 00:21:12,382
IT'S JUST ME HERE.
703
00:21:13,257 --> 00:21:14,384
I DON'T EVEN HAVE THE BOOK.
704
00:21:14,842 --> 00:21:17,178
DAMMIT...
705
00:21:17,845 --> 00:21:18,054
>>IS HE GOING TO BE OKAY,
706
00:21:18,429 --> 00:21:20,014
DOCTOR?
707
00:21:20,765 --> 00:21:21,849
>>ACTUALLY, WE GENERALLY DON'T
708
00:21:22,433 --> 00:21:23,393
TREAT DEAD PEOPLE.
709
00:21:24,352 --> 00:21:24,519
>>YEAH, HE'S DEAD. I TOLD YOU,
710
00:21:24,852 --> 00:21:25,478
MARK.
711
00:21:26,229 --> 00:21:26,562
>>FRANKLY, I'M SURPRISED YOU
712
00:21:27,271 --> 00:21:28,564
GOT HIM PAST THE FRONT DESK.
713
00:21:29,315 --> 00:21:30,983
I... HE'S BEEN DEAD FOR QUITE
714
00:21:31,734 --> 00:21:33,403
SOME TIME. THAT SMELL, THAT'S...
715
00:21:33,903 --> 00:21:34,404
THAT'S HIM.
716
00:21:35,029 --> 00:21:35,405
>>IT'S DEATH.
717
00:21:36,030 --> 00:21:36,406
>>YEAH, RIDICULOUS.
718
00:21:37,240 --> 00:21:37,407
>>I'M SORRY, WE WOULD HAVE
719
00:21:38,199 --> 00:21:38,408
ADMITTED HIM EARLIER, BUT WE HAD
720
00:21:39,117 --> 00:21:41,411
TO FINISH A SKETCH.
721
00:21:42,245 --> 00:21:44,747
>>WE'RE-- WE'RE NOT...
722
00:21:45,289 --> 00:21:45,415
TALKING ABOUT THAT.
723
00:21:46,165 --> 00:21:47,417
WE DON'T TALK ABOUT THAT.
724
00:21:48,126 --> 00:21:48,668
>>TALK ABOUT WHAT?
725
00:21:49,335 --> 00:21:51,003
>>THE-- I-I... I'M NOT IN
726
00:21:51,337 --> 00:21:52,338
THE...
727
00:21:53,005 --> 00:21:53,256
OH, WE'RE JUST TALKING
728
00:21:53,965 --> 00:21:55,425
ABOUT THAT THIS IS A SHOW. WE
729
00:21:56,384 --> 00:21:57,260
ALL READY DID THE META-THING.
730
00:21:58,010 --> 00:21:58,594
NOW, THIS IS LIKE, COME BACK
731
00:21:58,970 --> 00:21:59,554
OUT...
732
00:22:00,304 --> 00:22:01,097
>>WHAT LEVEL OF META ARE WE AT
733
00:22:01,514 --> 00:22:02,557
RIGHT NOW?
734
00:22:02,932 --> 00:22:03,433
>>THIRD?
735
00:22:04,350 --> 00:22:04,475
>>I DON'T KNOW. 'CAUSE WE DO
736
00:22:05,226 --> 00:22:05,685
THIS SKETCH INSIDE OF A SKETCH
737
00:22:06,436 --> 00:22:08,062
AND YOU'RE PLAYING A DOCTOR, BUT
738
00:22:08,771 --> 00:22:09,188
YOU'RE YOU, YOURSELF. I DON'T
739
00:22:09,939 --> 00:22:10,440
EVEN KNOW ANYMORE AND BRIAN'S...
740
00:22:10,940 --> 00:22:12,358
NOT DEAD?
741
00:22:12,859 --> 00:22:13,317
>>IS HE DEAD?
742
00:22:13,943 --> 00:22:14,235
>>NO, I'M NOT DEAD.
743
00:22:14,735 --> 00:22:15,069
>>HE'S NOT DEAD.
744
00:22:15,403 --> 00:22:15,570
>>WHAT?
745
00:22:16,320 --> 00:22:16,654
>>ALL RIGHT AND YOU'RE ACTUALLY
746
00:22:17,405 --> 00:22:18,197
PRETENDING TO BE REAL. AND I--
747
00:22:18,906 --> 00:22:19,449
ARE YOU REALLY FREAKED OUT BY
748
00:22:19,949 --> 00:22:20,450
IT?
749
00:22:21,033 --> 00:22:21,617
>>I-- YEAH.
750
00:22:22,326 --> 00:22:22,618
>>ARE YOU REALLY FREAKED OUT?
751
00:22:23,077 --> 00:22:23,536
>>YEAH, I AM.
752
00:22:24,245 --> 00:22:24,620
>>OR ARE YOU JUST BEING...
753
00:22:25,288 --> 00:22:25,621
>>I THOUGHT HE WAS DEAD.
754
00:22:26,122 --> 00:22:26,456
>>NO, YOU DIDN'T.
755
00:22:27,373 --> 00:22:27,457
>>WHAT ABOUT THOSE TWO KIDS?
756
00:22:28,082 --> 00:22:28,332
>>WHAT TWO KIDS?
757
00:22:29,041 --> 00:22:29,292
>>THE KIDS THAT SHOT HIM.
758
00:22:30,042 --> 00:22:30,376
>>YEAH, THE KIDS THAT SHOT HIM?
759
00:22:31,169 --> 00:22:32,545
BILL AND EVANY IN WIGS. THAT'S
760
00:22:32,962 --> 00:22:33,588
WHAT UH...
761
00:22:33,921 --> 00:22:34,505
>>WHAT?
762
00:22:35,173 --> 00:22:36,257
>>YEAH, DON'T-- DON'T EVEN.
763
00:22:37,008 --> 00:22:38,468
>>THAT'S A CAMERA, RIGHT THERE.
764
00:22:39,302 --> 00:22:40,470
THAT'S A CAMERA. THAT'S A BOOM
765
00:22:41,012 --> 00:22:41,471
MIC RIGHT THERE.
766
00:22:42,096 --> 00:22:42,472
>>THERE'S A BOOM.
767
00:22:43,222 --> 00:22:43,473
>>THOSE ARE SOME LIGHTS AND
768
00:22:44,223 --> 00:22:44,474
THAT'S UH, CREW RIGHT OVER
769
00:22:45,183 --> 00:22:45,475
THERE, MAN. AND THAT'S--
770
00:22:46,434 --> 00:22:46,476
>>YOU SHOULD BE MORE, BE MORE,
771
00:22:47,351 --> 00:22:47,602
BE MORE CONVINCING. BE MORE
772
00:22:48,352 --> 00:22:48,686
CONVINCING. LIKE YOU'RE REALLY
773
00:22:49,103 --> 00:22:49,562
CONFLICTED.
774
00:22:50,313 --> 00:22:50,563
>>JUST BE REALLY FREAKED OUT.
775
00:22:51,105 --> 00:22:51,481
REALLY FREAKED OUT.
776
00:22:52,398 --> 00:22:52,482
>>BRING IT BACK IT BACK IN.
777
00:22:53,274 --> 00:22:53,483
BRING IT BACK IN, I'M THE
778
00:22:53,858 --> 00:22:54,275
DOCTOR.
779
00:22:54,942 --> 00:22:55,318
>>REALLY FREAK OUT, REALLY
780
00:22:56,110 --> 00:22:56,319
FREAK OUT. YOU'RE EMOTIONAL,
781
00:22:56,819 --> 00:22:57,236
YOU'RE DEAD.
782
00:22:57,945 --> 00:23:42,322
>>MARK, NONE OF THIS IS REAL.
47906
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