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These are the user uploaded subtitles that are being translated: 1 00:00:00,500 --> 00:00:01,709 It's beautiful. 2 00:00:02,250 --> 00:00:03,250 So sweet. 3 00:00:03,750 --> 00:00:04,750 So innocent. 4 00:00:05,792 --> 00:00:06,917 So-- Trav, look out! 5 00:00:08,709 --> 00:00:09,875 Why do you keep doing that? 6 00:00:10,583 --> 00:00:11,875 Once you and Laurie have a kid, 7 00:00:11,959 --> 00:00:13,875 you have to be ready for anything. 8 00:00:13,959 --> 00:00:16,750 Now, if this were a real baby, it would be dead. 9 00:00:16,834 --> 00:00:18,500 I'd like to think, if it were a real baby, 10 00:00:18,583 --> 00:00:20,166 you wouldn't fire it across the room. 11 00:00:20,250 --> 00:00:21,625 Jules, relax. 12 00:00:21,709 --> 00:00:23,458 This baby is not coming anytime soon. 13 00:00:23,542 --> 00:00:25,750 I mean, you can't even tell that I'm pregnant yet. 14 00:00:25,834 --> 00:00:27,166 Mm. 15 00:00:27,250 --> 00:00:31,208 And the great news is... that's not gonna change. 16 00:00:33,208 --> 00:00:35,333 Oh, man, that's priceless. 17 00:00:35,417 --> 00:00:36,917 Every first-timer thinks 18 00:00:37,000 --> 00:00:39,750 that somehow she'll defy the odds and keep her figure. 19 00:00:39,834 --> 00:00:42,250 By the time month eight rolls around... 20 00:00:42,875 --> 00:00:45,667 Fe, fi, fo, fum. What? 21 00:00:45,750 --> 00:00:46,750 Fat. 22 00:00:47,291 --> 00:00:49,709 Even pregnant, the Keller girls always hang on to their bods. 23 00:00:49,792 --> 00:00:52,083 Okay, my cousin Tina kept it so tight, 24 00:00:52,166 --> 00:00:53,542 she didn't even know she was knocked up 25 00:00:53,625 --> 00:00:56,083 until she dropped a set of trips n the movie theater snack line, 26 00:00:56,166 --> 00:00:57,834 hence their names-- Mike, Ike, and Goobers. 27 00:00:58,500 --> 00:00:59,625 All right. 28 00:00:59,709 --> 00:01:01,917 Ten bucks a head says that, by month eight, 29 00:01:02,000 --> 00:01:04,083 I am still rocking these tight-ass dresses. 30 00:01:08,583 --> 00:01:10,333 I hate everything! 31 00:01:18,333 --> 00:01:20,208 Whatever. 32 00:01:20,291 --> 00:01:22,417 No way! I miss you more. 33 00:01:23,166 --> 00:01:24,166 Is he talking to Bobby? 34 00:01:24,667 --> 00:01:26,709 Blue polo, really cool shorts. 35 00:01:26,792 --> 00:01:27,917 What are you wearing? 36 00:01:28,000 --> 00:01:29,458 Either that, or he's having an affair. 37 00:01:29,542 --> 00:01:31,041 Please let it be an affair. 38 00:01:31,709 --> 00:01:33,000 Bobby says "hey" from Georgia. 39 00:01:33,625 --> 00:01:35,250 {\an8}He's doing really great in this golf tournament. 40 00:01:35,333 --> 00:01:37,166 {\an8}Yesterday, he hit three birdies. 41 00:01:38,709 --> 00:01:39,834 He meant the golf kind, right? 42 00:01:50,291 --> 00:01:52,166 Here comes the lovely mom-to-be. 43 00:01:52,250 --> 00:01:54,083 What the hell is that supposed to mean? 44 00:01:54,166 --> 00:01:56,166 You look beautiful. You have a radiant glow, 45 00:01:56,250 --> 00:01:57,291 almost an angelic-- 46 00:02:00,709 --> 00:02:03,125 Baby socks filled with nickels. 47 00:02:03,208 --> 00:02:05,417 {\an8}It's my go-to weapon from juvie. 48 00:02:05,500 --> 00:02:08,792 {\an8}These are gonna be hitting the faces of anyone who pisses me off. 49 00:02:09,959 --> 00:02:13,750 {\an8}Being pregnant sucks! 50 00:02:14,250 --> 00:02:16,917 {\an8}I'm gassy. I'm bloated. 51 00:02:17,000 --> 00:02:19,333 {\an8}Honey, you just got to focus on the finish. 52 00:02:19,458 --> 00:02:21,000 {\an8}You only have one more month. 53 00:02:21,083 --> 00:02:27,041 {\an8}Just four little weeks, 29 days, 696 hours, 41,000-- 54 00:02:31,000 --> 00:02:33,250 {\an8}I remember when you were just a wee scamp. 55 00:02:33,333 --> 00:02:35,667 {\an8}And soon you'll be a dad! 56 00:02:36,458 --> 00:02:38,000 Who's all grown up? 57 00:02:38,125 --> 00:02:40,417 {\an8}You're all grown up! Ooh! 58 00:02:40,500 --> 00:02:42,458 Grayson, I bet you look good in black. 59 00:02:42,959 --> 00:02:44,208 Feels like a safe bet. 60 00:02:44,792 --> 00:02:46,792 {\an8}Brand-new Italian leather. 61 00:02:46,875 --> 00:02:48,083 {\an8}- Oh. - Got it for me, but, uh, 62 00:02:48,166 --> 00:02:49,125 it's a little big. 63 00:02:49,208 --> 00:02:50,875 {\an8}Probably wondering why I bought that. 64 00:02:50,959 --> 00:02:52,542 {\an8}Allow me to explain. 65 00:02:52,625 --> 00:02:54,458 {\an8}Just tell your stupid story, Tom. 66 00:02:54,542 --> 00:02:55,750 {\an8}I was feeling stagnant. 67 00:02:55,834 --> 00:02:58,625 {\an8}Wanted a new twist on "classic" Tom. 68 00:02:58,709 --> 00:02:59,917 So I tried a couple new looks, 69 00:03:00,000 --> 00:03:02,208 {\an8}worked up a Scottish brogue. 70 00:03:02,709 --> 00:03:04,875 {\an8}Even briefly flirted with a Fu Manchu. 71 00:03:06,083 --> 00:03:07,959 Then I realized what new Tom really needed. 72 00:03:08,709 --> 00:03:09,709 Bacon? 73 00:03:09,792 --> 00:03:10,959 {\an8}A pet pig. 74 00:03:11,542 --> 00:03:12,834 {\an8}Got the idea from George Clooney. 75 00:03:12,917 --> 00:03:14,000 {\an8}I call him Sniglet. 76 00:03:14,083 --> 00:03:15,458 Sniglet the piglet. 77 00:03:16,500 --> 00:03:18,542 Don't act like it's not adorable. 78 00:03:18,625 --> 00:03:21,125 Plus, I-I remodeled my garage to this cool bar setup, 79 00:03:21,208 --> 00:03:23,291 {\an8}So I figure we'll hang out here all the time. 80 00:03:23,375 --> 00:03:25,083 {\an8}I'm leaving, and I'm never coming back. 81 00:03:26,250 --> 00:03:28,250 Whoa! 82 00:03:29,542 --> 00:03:30,500 Was that expensive? 83 00:03:30,625 --> 00:03:31,583 Uh, very. 84 00:03:32,583 --> 00:03:34,959 You're not very good with your hands, are you? 85 00:03:35,041 --> 00:03:36,709 {\an8}No, my tee-ball coach diagnosed me 86 00:03:36,792 --> 00:03:38,625 {\an8}with a terminal case of the dropsies. 87 00:03:38,709 --> 00:03:40,375 Why? 88 00:03:40,458 --> 00:03:42,417 {\an8}A month from now, you're gonna be holding 89 00:03:42,500 --> 00:03:44,875 {\an8}a fragile infant life in your hands. 90 00:03:45,458 --> 00:03:46,959 Do you think it's gonna be a problem? 91 00:03:47,041 --> 00:03:48,667 Babies' heads are soft. 92 00:03:53,041 --> 00:03:55,125 So hot, and there's nowhere to sit. 93 00:03:55,750 --> 00:03:57,000 Why'd you make me come here, Jules? 94 00:03:57,083 --> 00:03:58,208 {\an8}To show you something. 95 00:03:59,333 --> 00:04:01,458 {\an8}You know, Laurie, there are a thousand terrible things 96 00:04:01,542 --> 00:04:04,333 about being super pregnant, but there's also one amazing thing. 97 00:04:04,417 --> 00:04:07,875 Now, when a woman has this, she can do anything. 98 00:04:07,959 --> 00:04:09,000 Ellie! 99 00:04:09,500 --> 00:04:11,750 Show her how a pregnant woman gets a table. 100 00:04:12,500 --> 00:04:14,417 Oh, no. Ohh. 101 00:04:15,417 --> 00:04:16,709 Ohh. I'm sorry. I'm pregnant. 102 00:04:16,792 --> 00:04:18,375 Oh. 103 00:04:19,291 --> 00:04:22,792 {\an8}Oh, my gosh! That was amazing. 104 00:04:22,875 --> 00:04:24,875 {\an8}Ow. I can do stuff like that? 105 00:04:24,959 --> 00:04:26,542 When I was super pregnant, 106 00:04:26,625 --> 00:04:29,709 I used to just walk into strangers' houses and take stuff. 107 00:04:29,792 --> 00:04:32,792 I broke into a Little Debbie truck, ate my weight in Nutty Bars, 108 00:04:32,875 --> 00:04:34,709 and fell asleep on some Zebra Cakes. 109 00:04:34,792 --> 00:04:36,083 Oh, hi. 110 00:04:36,166 --> 00:04:38,917 Oh, I'm sorry. I-I'm really, really pregnant. 111 00:04:39,875 --> 00:04:40,959 Yeah. 112 00:04:41,041 --> 00:04:43,291 Oh! This is amazing! 113 00:04:43,375 --> 00:04:44,917 Imaginary hat. 114 00:04:45,000 --> 00:04:48,166 Imaginary maracas. 115 00:04:48,250 --> 00:04:49,542 W-what are we doing? 116 00:04:49,625 --> 00:04:50,667 So dumb. 117 00:04:54,583 --> 00:04:56,917 "The Hulk isn't strong enough to beat up Superman. 118 00:04:57,500 --> 00:04:59,583 But two Hulks? Perhaps." 119 00:05:00,959 --> 00:05:02,250 Those are your thoughts. 120 00:05:04,583 --> 00:05:05,667 'Cause you're a nerd. 121 00:05:07,208 --> 00:05:08,792 Hey, what is it? 122 00:05:09,500 --> 00:05:11,166 Can I be trusted with a kid? 123 00:05:11,667 --> 00:05:12,792 What are you talking about? 124 00:05:12,875 --> 00:05:14,375 I'm a total goof. 125 00:05:14,458 --> 00:05:17,166 Crap reflexes, clumsy hands, zero coordination. 126 00:05:18,125 --> 00:05:19,375 I'll clean that. 127 00:05:19,458 --> 00:05:20,959 I actually get it. 128 00:05:21,041 --> 00:05:23,000 I remember the first time I held my daughter. 129 00:05:24,375 --> 00:05:26,917 Yes, I have a daughter. I found out three years ago. 130 00:05:27,000 --> 00:05:28,834 Her name is Tampa. How come no one remembers that? 131 00:05:29,959 --> 00:05:31,625 I visit her every weekend. 132 00:05:31,709 --> 00:05:33,417 I have a phone filled with pictures. 133 00:05:34,375 --> 00:05:35,375 Of your own abs? 134 00:05:35,500 --> 00:05:37,709 Don't look at that. It's... 135 00:05:38,792 --> 00:05:41,375 The point is, I can help you. 136 00:05:41,959 --> 00:05:45,417 We just need to boost your confidence with a little baby practice. 137 00:05:46,583 --> 00:05:49,000 Congratulations, Dad. 138 00:05:49,083 --> 00:05:50,083 A word of caution. 139 00:05:50,166 --> 00:05:52,166 Her favorite food is fingers. 140 00:06:00,792 --> 00:06:02,166 Mmm. 141 00:06:05,875 --> 00:06:07,250 What do you think You're doing? 142 00:06:07,333 --> 00:06:09,250 Pretty much anything I want. 143 00:06:13,875 --> 00:06:15,083 Officer, ma'am. 144 00:06:19,000 --> 00:06:21,000 First, I get stripped of my pregnancy powers, 145 00:06:21,083 --> 00:06:23,458 and now I have to pay a citation. 146 00:06:23,542 --> 00:06:25,250 All right, I got this. It's fine. 147 00:06:25,333 --> 00:06:27,041 I am miserable. 148 00:06:27,125 --> 00:06:30,959 Okay, I can't sleep, I pee when I sneeze, 149 00:06:31,041 --> 00:06:33,625 I've got so many tiny little stretch marks on my ass 150 00:06:33,709 --> 00:06:34,750 that it's starting to look like 151 00:06:34,834 --> 00:06:36,500 A diagram of the Japanese alphabet. 152 00:06:36,583 --> 00:06:37,667 I have that, too. 153 00:06:38,458 --> 00:06:39,875 Honey, we're all here for you. 154 00:06:39,959 --> 00:06:42,875 No, you're not! And I'm suffering alone! 155 00:06:43,917 --> 00:06:45,959 And worst of all, I can't do that. 156 00:06:47,709 --> 00:06:49,083 I can't drink. 157 00:06:49,166 --> 00:06:51,166 And it just makes me so mad that I wanna... 158 00:06:51,250 --> 00:06:52,417 You know what? 159 00:06:52,959 --> 00:06:55,333 All right, wait. I can fix this. 160 00:06:55,417 --> 00:06:58,875 Until you have your baby, none of us will drink. 161 00:06:59,333 --> 00:07:01,000 You would do that for me? 162 00:07:01,083 --> 00:07:02,083 Yes? 163 00:07:02,875 --> 00:07:04,125 Jules! 164 00:07:04,208 --> 00:07:06,458 Aww! 165 00:07:09,667 --> 00:07:14,041 I just can't believe that you guys are giving up wine to support me. 166 00:07:14,125 --> 00:07:15,792 Well, Laurie, that's what friends do. 167 00:07:15,875 --> 00:07:16,875 They support each other. 168 00:07:16,959 --> 00:07:18,250 Oh... 169 00:07:19,125 --> 00:07:20,166 No matter what. 170 00:07:20,250 --> 00:07:22,291 Jules, I adore you, 171 00:07:22,375 --> 00:07:24,667 and I love how devoted you are to your friends. 172 00:07:24,750 --> 00:07:26,709 That being said, this idea is horse crap! 173 00:07:26,792 --> 00:07:28,625 - I'm with Tom. - "Things Ellie never says." 174 00:07:28,709 --> 00:07:30,083 Am I right? 175 00:07:31,083 --> 00:07:32,583 All right, guys, I know this is gonna suck. 176 00:07:32,667 --> 00:07:35,208 But we have to do this for her. She needs us. 177 00:07:35,291 --> 00:07:37,041 Rotten, stinking horse crap. 178 00:07:39,417 --> 00:07:42,458 All right, I repeat. We're doing this for our friend. 179 00:07:44,542 --> 00:07:46,542 How are we gonna go a whole month without wine? 180 00:07:46,625 --> 00:07:48,291 Cheating. 181 00:07:49,417 --> 00:07:52,458 Listen, we just need a place where we won't get caught, 182 00:07:52,542 --> 00:07:54,500 a place that no one will look for us, 183 00:07:54,583 --> 00:07:56,792 a place so utterly detestable 184 00:07:56,875 --> 00:07:59,750 that no sane person would ever consider going there. 185 00:08:00,625 --> 00:08:02,000 What brings you guys to my place? 186 00:08:05,250 --> 00:08:08,250 You know, instead of pouring it out, you could just not drink it. 187 00:08:09,125 --> 00:08:10,583 Are you wearing a baby Bjorn? 188 00:08:11,250 --> 00:08:13,709 Dad practice. Got to go. 189 00:08:14,583 --> 00:08:16,875 For a new dad, danger is everywhere. 190 00:08:16,959 --> 00:08:20,041 I'm gonna open your mind to that danger and teach you... 191 00:08:21,709 --> 00:08:22,750 ...to see. 192 00:08:27,792 --> 00:08:31,041 Gulfhaven is a system, Trav. 193 00:08:31,125 --> 00:08:32,583 Whoa. Hey! 194 00:08:32,667 --> 00:08:35,500 And that system is your enemy. 195 00:08:36,166 --> 00:08:38,291 Look around. What do you see? 196 00:08:38,375 --> 00:08:40,291 Teachers? Lawyers? 197 00:08:40,375 --> 00:08:42,291 People with so much on their minds 198 00:08:42,834 --> 00:08:44,458 that they are oblivious to you. 199 00:08:47,792 --> 00:08:49,500 You have to understand that these people 200 00:08:49,583 --> 00:08:53,500 are so hopelessly consumed with their own lives 201 00:08:53,542 --> 00:08:55,000 they will walk straight through you 202 00:08:55,083 --> 00:08:58,500 and never realize that you are holding a child. 203 00:09:06,625 --> 00:09:08,458 Were you listening to me, Trav? 204 00:09:08,542 --> 00:09:10,792 Or were you looking at the man in the red suit? 205 00:09:10,875 --> 00:09:12,792 - I was... - Look again. 206 00:09:13,792 --> 00:09:16,166 - Aah! - Free taco at Señor Casa. 207 00:09:18,542 --> 00:09:19,542 Thank you. 208 00:09:20,667 --> 00:09:21,917 Why'd you do that? 209 00:09:22,000 --> 00:09:23,083 I want a taco. 210 00:09:24,041 --> 00:09:26,792 Tom, if we're gonna drink here, we can't get caught. 211 00:09:27,792 --> 00:09:29,166 What are our defenses? 212 00:09:29,250 --> 00:09:32,125 Uh, well, my garage is completely soundproof. 213 00:09:32,208 --> 00:09:34,000 Terrifying. Continue. 214 00:09:34,083 --> 00:09:36,041 A-and over there, we could use a secret knock. 215 00:09:39,458 --> 00:09:40,583 Wakow! 216 00:09:41,291 --> 00:09:43,625 Um, it's just like a speakeasy. 217 00:09:43,709 --> 00:09:46,417 Which is why we should wear '20s gear. 218 00:09:47,041 --> 00:09:48,041 Tom. 219 00:09:49,083 --> 00:09:50,542 This is the coolest you've ever been. 220 00:09:50,625 --> 00:09:52,875 - Yeah! - Not necessarily a compliment. 221 00:09:53,750 --> 00:09:54,750 Okay. 222 00:09:56,458 --> 00:09:58,291 Is this place always this lame? 223 00:09:58,375 --> 00:10:00,208 I don't remember it sucking this much. 224 00:10:00,750 --> 00:10:02,917 Ugh. I'll tell you what I don't miss. 225 00:10:03,000 --> 00:10:04,125 Wine. 226 00:10:04,208 --> 00:10:06,041 Honey, are you holding an imaginary glass? 227 00:10:07,125 --> 00:10:08,166 No. 228 00:10:08,250 --> 00:10:09,625 These are just my, um... 229 00:10:09,709 --> 00:10:11,166 my Lego guy hands. 230 00:10:11,250 --> 00:10:12,583 - Oh! - You know? Yep. 231 00:10:12,667 --> 00:10:13,792 I love that. 232 00:10:13,875 --> 00:10:14,917 - Right? - Yeah. 233 00:10:15,000 --> 00:10:17,166 Look, the days do get long without the wine, 234 00:10:17,250 --> 00:10:19,208 but you find ways to pass the time. 235 00:10:19,834 --> 00:10:23,542 Rubber-band balls, you know, seeing how high you can count, 236 00:10:24,208 --> 00:10:25,834 following Tom on Twitter. 237 00:10:25,917 --> 00:10:29,333 It's just so amazing that you are doing this with me. 238 00:10:29,417 --> 00:10:31,709 Giving up wine for a whole month? 239 00:10:32,500 --> 00:10:33,583 Maybe more! 240 00:10:33,667 --> 00:10:37,083 I mean, if this baby is late, it could be, like, five weeks. 241 00:10:37,166 --> 00:10:39,500 One day over, and I will pull that baby out myself! 242 00:10:41,417 --> 00:10:44,250 I'm just kidding. God! 243 00:10:44,333 --> 00:10:46,375 Well, I better go to the bathroom. 244 00:10:46,458 --> 00:10:47,625 Silly. 245 00:10:48,250 --> 00:10:49,291 Okay. 246 00:10:53,625 --> 00:10:55,875 This is berries, and I'm on a toot. 247 00:10:55,959 --> 00:10:59,166 One more jorum, and-- and we're a half-seas over! 248 00:11:02,583 --> 00:11:04,250 Hello, Jules! 249 00:11:04,333 --> 00:11:06,041 Damn it, Tom. 250 00:11:07,458 --> 00:11:08,917 Jules, how'd you find us? 251 00:11:09,000 --> 00:11:10,709 Turns out that Bobby doesn't know how to text 252 00:11:10,792 --> 00:11:12,291 and think at the same time. 253 00:11:13,166 --> 00:11:16,250 "Hey, J-Bird. how's that secret bar in Tom's garage? 254 00:11:16,333 --> 00:11:18,959 Oh, wait. Jules doesn't know about that. 255 00:11:19,041 --> 00:11:21,667 Shoot. I better not press send." 256 00:11:21,750 --> 00:11:23,959 He tries so hard, bless his heart. 257 00:11:24,041 --> 00:11:25,083 You have a choice. 258 00:11:25,166 --> 00:11:28,792 You can either crush us, or... 259 00:11:28,875 --> 00:11:30,000 you can join us. 260 00:11:31,875 --> 00:11:33,166 Give in to the grape. 261 00:11:33,250 --> 00:11:34,250 Never. 262 00:11:34,333 --> 00:11:35,917 - Submit. - I made a promise. 263 00:11:36,000 --> 00:11:37,166 - Break it. - I won't. 264 00:11:37,250 --> 00:11:39,000 - You're weak. - I'm strong! 265 00:11:39,083 --> 00:11:40,250 Oh. 266 00:11:40,834 --> 00:11:42,458 No? 267 00:11:42,542 --> 00:11:43,750 Ohh. 268 00:11:43,834 --> 00:11:44,959 What was that? 269 00:11:50,250 --> 00:11:51,250 Wow. 270 00:11:54,083 --> 00:11:55,417 Gulfhaven Plaza. 271 00:11:55,500 --> 00:11:57,458 A normal day, a normal scene. 272 00:11:57,542 --> 00:12:00,083 Nothing to fear here, right? Wrong! 273 00:12:00,792 --> 00:12:03,083 Didn't let me answer. I was gonna say wrong. 274 00:12:03,667 --> 00:12:05,417 Oh, okay. Partial credit. 275 00:12:06,750 --> 00:12:09,542 Hidden baby danger is everywhere. 276 00:12:09,625 --> 00:12:12,125 A dad must be able to find it. 277 00:12:12,208 --> 00:12:13,917 So, tell me... 278 00:12:15,000 --> 00:12:17,542 what do you see? 279 00:12:17,625 --> 00:12:19,834 I don't know. Uh, people shopping. 280 00:12:19,917 --> 00:12:22,083 Shopping? Come on, man. 281 00:12:22,166 --> 00:12:24,959 You've got a child. You need to focus. 282 00:12:25,041 --> 00:12:28,083 Now, what do you see? 283 00:12:28,667 --> 00:12:30,166 I just see the plaza. I'm sorry. 284 00:12:30,250 --> 00:12:31,375 - I can't do this. - No, no, no. 285 00:12:31,458 --> 00:12:33,250 Just-- Trav, Trav, Trav. Listen to me, okay? 286 00:12:34,166 --> 00:12:36,000 Look, in a few weeks, this won't be a pig. 287 00:12:36,083 --> 00:12:37,750 It will be a child. 288 00:12:37,834 --> 00:12:39,917 And that child's gonna need you to keep it safe. 289 00:12:40,542 --> 00:12:43,667 Okay, so, now imagine you're holding your baby. 290 00:12:43,750 --> 00:12:45,417 And look out there now and tell me... 291 00:12:48,291 --> 00:12:52,041 ...what do you see? 292 00:12:55,333 --> 00:12:56,458 Texting jogger. 293 00:12:56,542 --> 00:12:57,542 Bad skater. 294 00:12:59,291 --> 00:13:00,333 Shaky ladder. 295 00:13:01,291 --> 00:13:02,291 Dog off a leash. 296 00:13:04,625 --> 00:13:07,125 And a waiter who misjudged his ability to handle too many glasses. 297 00:13:07,667 --> 00:13:09,375 Oh! 298 00:13:11,083 --> 00:13:12,083 I did it. 299 00:13:12,709 --> 00:13:13,709 I can see. 300 00:13:16,458 --> 00:13:18,000 Whoa. Where's your baby, Trav? 301 00:13:18,625 --> 00:13:19,625 My baby! 302 00:13:19,709 --> 00:13:21,208 My baby! I lost my baby! 303 00:13:21,792 --> 00:13:23,041 No, he's-- 304 00:13:23,125 --> 00:13:24,750 His baby is a pig. 305 00:13:26,083 --> 00:13:28,083 Uh, no. An actual pig. 306 00:13:28,166 --> 00:13:30,500 Not a child that's so ugly we don't need to find it. 307 00:13:30,583 --> 00:13:31,583 I didn't... 308 00:13:33,208 --> 00:13:34,583 Excuse me. 309 00:13:36,250 --> 00:13:39,208 I feel like I've completely betrayed someone I love. 310 00:13:40,208 --> 00:13:43,041 On the other hand, secret wine bar! 311 00:13:44,291 --> 00:13:45,333 Yeehee! 312 00:13:49,041 --> 00:13:50,458 G-man! 313 00:13:50,542 --> 00:13:52,583 You guys are running a speakeasy? 314 00:13:52,667 --> 00:13:55,083 You can be mad, or you can drink. 315 00:13:55,625 --> 00:13:56,792 Oh, okay. 316 00:13:56,875 --> 00:13:58,041 Mmm! 317 00:14:00,250 --> 00:14:01,959 Oh, so, Tom. 318 00:14:02,041 --> 00:14:05,083 What might a fella do, hypothetically, 319 00:14:05,166 --> 00:14:07,875 to track down a tiny, helpless, missing baby pig? 320 00:14:07,959 --> 00:14:09,333 You lost Sniglet? 321 00:14:09,417 --> 00:14:10,709 I can't believe it. 322 00:14:10,792 --> 00:14:11,917 A minute ago, everything was great. 323 00:14:12,000 --> 00:14:15,959 I was Mr. Popular, Dr. Fun, tweeting out bar pics. 324 00:14:16,041 --> 00:14:17,625 Everyone thought I was cool. 325 00:14:17,709 --> 00:14:19,041 - Mnh-mnh. - Wait a minute, Tom. 326 00:14:19,125 --> 00:14:21,208 You've been tweeting pictures of this? 327 00:14:21,291 --> 00:14:22,709 Yeah. So? 328 00:14:22,792 --> 00:14:25,458 Oh, hey, guys. 329 00:14:28,917 --> 00:14:31,417 - Nickel socks! - We're trapped! 330 00:14:31,500 --> 00:14:34,208 Laurie, let's talk about this. 331 00:14:34,291 --> 00:14:36,000 No more talking. 332 00:14:59,000 --> 00:14:59,834 Please! 333 00:14:59,917 --> 00:15:01,750 They made me do it! 334 00:15:02,417 --> 00:15:04,834 You wouldn't hurt old Tom, would you? 335 00:15:07,792 --> 00:15:09,417 I can't believe I lost my baby. 336 00:15:10,375 --> 00:15:12,166 What does that say about me as a dad? 337 00:15:12,250 --> 00:15:13,792 Should've worn a condom. 338 00:15:13,875 --> 00:15:14,917 I can get the pig back. 339 00:15:15,583 --> 00:15:16,792 What? 340 00:15:16,875 --> 00:15:21,333 But after I do this, we are never to speak of it. 341 00:15:26,125 --> 00:15:28,750 I grew up on a farm. It's something you pick up. 342 00:15:28,834 --> 00:15:30,625 - We know. - Fine. Who cares? 343 00:15:34,500 --> 00:15:36,667 Soo-o-o-ey! 344 00:15:45,834 --> 00:15:47,041 My baby! 345 00:15:52,500 --> 00:15:53,750 Looky! 346 00:15:55,250 --> 00:15:56,709 Not one word. 347 00:15:59,333 --> 00:16:00,375 Now for you. 348 00:16:01,542 --> 00:16:03,125 You have every right to be mad. 349 00:16:03,959 --> 00:16:05,959 The nickel assault felt a little excessive. 350 00:16:06,041 --> 00:16:07,417 You said that you could fix this. 351 00:16:07,500 --> 00:16:08,542 Well, I was wrong. 352 00:16:08,625 --> 00:16:11,417 I can't fix it, Laurie. Nobody can. 353 00:16:11,542 --> 00:16:14,000 You're eight months pregnant, and that just sucks. 354 00:16:14,083 --> 00:16:17,667 I'm sorry that you are suffering right now, but that's just the way it is. 355 00:16:18,291 --> 00:16:21,083 You're gonna have to put on a brave face and power through this 356 00:16:21,166 --> 00:16:23,083 because that's what it means to be a mom. 357 00:16:24,667 --> 00:16:26,875 Tough love from Jules. 358 00:16:26,959 --> 00:16:28,208 Maybe it's what I needed. 359 00:16:28,291 --> 00:16:31,834 I'm sorry I've been so whining and miserable. 360 00:16:33,417 --> 00:16:36,709 Jules to the rescue, as always. 361 00:16:37,375 --> 00:16:40,083 Mom, we'd be totally helpless without you. 362 00:16:40,667 --> 00:16:42,250 We're just so lucky that you're always there 363 00:16:42,375 --> 00:16:43,333 to fix everything. 364 00:16:43,417 --> 00:16:44,792 And, I mean, we know that if there's something 365 00:16:44,875 --> 00:16:48,834 that we can't handle with this kid, we can always lean on you. 366 00:16:54,917 --> 00:16:56,250 - Hey. - Hey. 367 00:16:56,333 --> 00:16:57,333 You okay? 368 00:16:58,125 --> 00:16:59,125 Yeah. 369 00:17:00,625 --> 00:17:02,000 I just... I need some air. 370 00:17:09,709 --> 00:17:11,917 Wine isn't as good without the fear of being caught. 371 00:17:12,000 --> 00:17:13,000 Where's the rush? 372 00:17:15,458 --> 00:17:16,667 Look at the little piggle. 373 00:17:16,750 --> 00:17:18,458 Hey, you found your pig baby. 374 00:17:18,542 --> 00:17:20,417 - So, how'd your training go? - Pretty good, actually. 375 00:17:20,500 --> 00:17:22,542 Grayson taught me to see like a dad, so... 376 00:17:22,625 --> 00:17:23,917 Dime eyes? What does he know? 377 00:17:24,709 --> 00:17:26,333 Oh, wait. He has a kid. 378 00:17:27,166 --> 00:17:29,542 Hey. You guys seen Jules? 379 00:17:29,625 --> 00:17:31,667 - No. - Where'd she go, and who's she with? 380 00:17:31,750 --> 00:17:34,166 I mean, we're all here, Laurie's gone home to rest, 381 00:17:34,250 --> 00:17:36,166 and, well, we don't like anybody else. 382 00:17:36,250 --> 00:17:37,917 Is she alone? 383 00:17:38,000 --> 00:17:40,417 No. Jules hates to be alone. 384 00:17:40,500 --> 00:17:41,750 Oh, unless... 385 00:17:43,166 --> 00:17:44,542 I totally forgot he had a kid. 386 00:17:44,625 --> 00:17:45,625 Mm-hmm. 387 00:17:46,417 --> 00:17:48,750 Hey, whatever happened to Barb? 388 00:17:56,125 --> 00:17:59,083 I figured that this was a good place to be alone. 389 00:17:59,166 --> 00:18:01,083 Wow, you look spooked. 390 00:18:02,458 --> 00:18:03,792 Is this about Trav and Laurie? 391 00:18:03,875 --> 00:18:06,417 Well, that, and I looked inside Bobby's cooler. 392 00:18:06,500 --> 00:18:09,250 - Spiders? - Fighting a scorpion. 393 00:18:09,333 --> 00:18:11,834 - Ooh. - Okay, go ahead. One peek. 394 00:18:14,709 --> 00:18:17,500 That's so awesome. 395 00:18:17,583 --> 00:18:18,959 Look at them. Like, "I'm gonna get you." 396 00:18:19,041 --> 00:18:20,667 "No, you're not. I--" 397 00:18:23,041 --> 00:18:25,000 Lay it on me. I'm totally here for you, babe. 398 00:18:26,583 --> 00:18:28,333 Those two lean on me for everything. 399 00:18:28,875 --> 00:18:31,417 And if they can't handle it, I'm gonna be the one raising the baby. 400 00:18:32,709 --> 00:18:35,542 It was really hard the first time, and I was younger then. 401 00:18:36,959 --> 00:18:39,125 I can't imagine being 40 and having an infant. 402 00:18:39,625 --> 00:18:40,959 You're not 40. 403 00:18:41,041 --> 00:18:42,250 Did that feel helpful? 404 00:18:42,333 --> 00:18:43,834 No. I have no idea why I said it. 405 00:18:44,959 --> 00:18:46,417 Look, Jules. 406 00:18:47,041 --> 00:18:49,792 Whatever happens here, you're not gonna be alone. 407 00:18:52,083 --> 00:18:53,375 Although I might not be an expert, 408 00:18:53,458 --> 00:18:56,625 I have picked up a few parenting tricks along the way and... 409 00:18:57,709 --> 00:18:59,417 Do not tell me you forgot I have a kid. 410 00:18:59,500 --> 00:19:00,959 No. 411 00:19:01,542 --> 00:19:03,542 No, I totally remember... 412 00:19:04,875 --> 00:19:05,875 Tampa. 413 00:19:05,959 --> 00:19:07,417 That she lives in Tampa, right. 414 00:19:09,875 --> 00:19:11,500 Look, Jules. 415 00:19:11,583 --> 00:19:13,625 There's a good chance you're right about Trav and Laurie, 416 00:19:13,709 --> 00:19:17,375 but there's also a chance that they step up and surprise all of us. 417 00:19:17,458 --> 00:19:18,458 I mean, think about it. 418 00:19:18,583 --> 00:19:20,709 Where you ready to be a mom when you got pregnant? 419 00:19:20,792 --> 00:19:23,417 I took my pregnancy test in the bathroom at WrestleMania. 420 00:19:23,959 --> 00:19:28,417 Right, but now you've moved on from your completely insane life, 421 00:19:28,500 --> 00:19:32,625 and, well, you've become the best mom I know. 422 00:19:33,542 --> 00:19:34,542 Okay? 423 00:19:35,083 --> 00:19:37,917 So whatever we have to do to make this work, 424 00:19:38,667 --> 00:19:41,417 I promise you... we will, Jules. 425 00:19:42,041 --> 00:19:43,125 Mm. 426 00:19:45,208 --> 00:19:46,208 I hope so. 427 00:19:48,291 --> 00:19:50,125 Is there anything that would cheer you up right now? 428 00:19:55,542 --> 00:19:57,750 Super-pregnant dance party. 429 00:19:57,834 --> 00:19:59,125 Whoo! 430 00:20:11,542 --> 00:20:14,166 ♪ Super-pregnant dance party ♪ 431 00:20:16,125 --> 00:20:17,625 I love you so much. 432 00:20:17,709 --> 00:20:20,041 Are you talking to me or Skyping with Bobby? 433 00:20:21,500 --> 00:20:22,583 - Uh-huh. - Mm-hmm. 434 00:20:29,041 --> 00:20:30,166 {\an8}It's ridiculous. 435 00:20:30,250 --> 00:20:32,959 {\an8}I'm down for a little PDA, but this is too much. 436 00:20:36,875 --> 00:20:39,166 {\an8}Okay, I think you're good on kisses for now. 437 00:20:39,250 --> 00:20:41,208 {\an8}You're gonna see her next weekend. 438 00:20:41,291 --> 00:20:42,667 {\an8}Okay. Bye-bye, sweetheart. 439 00:20:43,542 --> 00:20:44,542 {\an8}- Bye. - Say "bye." 440 00:20:44,625 --> 00:20:46,041 {\an8}- Bye. - Bye. 441 00:20:48,041 --> 00:20:49,166 {\an8}That's a cute kid. 442 00:20:49,250 --> 00:20:50,959 {\an8}Yeah. She really is. 443 00:20:51,583 --> 00:20:53,500 {\an8}How do you, uh, know her? 31098

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