Would you like to inspect the original subtitles? These are the user uploaded subtitles that are being translated:
1
00:00:04,872 --> 00:00:06,707
That is a very
sexy woman.
2
00:00:08,442 --> 00:00:09,477
Whose car is it?
3
00:00:09,543 --> 00:00:10,678
My psychiatrist's.
4
00:00:10,744 --> 00:00:12,012
( alarm blaring )
5
00:00:12,080 --> 00:00:13,547
Let's get
out of here, Charlie.
6
00:00:13,614 --> 00:00:15,683
You're not just going
to leave me here, are you?
7
00:00:15,749 --> 00:00:17,718
Here we are. Chez Charlie.
8
00:00:19,153 --> 00:00:20,688
She's taking her clothes off.
9
00:00:20,754 --> 00:00:22,190
Is this a great
country or what?
10
00:00:22,256 --> 00:00:23,757
You guys are so cute.
11
00:00:23,824 --> 00:00:25,025
Right back at you.
12
00:00:25,093 --> 00:00:26,227
Good, Charlie.
13
00:00:26,294 --> 00:00:27,495
Keep hitting on
the deranged woman.
14
00:00:27,561 --> 00:00:28,329
Hey, Charlie,
15
00:00:28,396 --> 00:00:30,464
you're a really
cool guy,
16
00:00:30,531 --> 00:00:32,733
but I'm not going
to have sex with you.
17
00:00:32,800 --> 00:00:35,803
Ever?
18
00:00:35,869 --> 00:00:37,771
Deep tissue massage,
pancakes...
19
00:00:37,838 --> 00:00:39,440
If you had a TV
on your forehead
20
00:00:39,507 --> 00:00:41,809
and could breathe through
your ears, you'd be perfect.
21
00:00:43,177 --> 00:00:44,278
So you just assume
22
00:00:44,345 --> 00:00:45,679
that if we were both
interested
23
00:00:45,746 --> 00:00:47,815
in the same woman,
you would come out on top.
24
00:00:47,881 --> 00:00:48,749
Of course I would.
25
00:00:48,816 --> 00:00:50,084
What are you afraid of?
26
00:00:50,151 --> 00:00:52,019
I'm afraid I'm going
to hit you so hard
27
00:00:52,086 --> 00:00:53,020
I'll be an only child.
28
00:00:53,087 --> 00:00:53,854
Are you sure?
29
00:00:53,921 --> 00:00:54,822
It's settled.
30
00:00:54,888 --> 00:00:55,923
You're staying with us.
31
00:00:55,989 --> 00:00:57,057
Of course, we still don't know
32
00:00:57,125 --> 00:00:58,058
a damn thing about her.
33
00:00:58,126 --> 00:00:59,760
I'm Joanie.
34
00:00:59,827 --> 00:01:01,395
Hello.
Hi.
35
00:01:01,462 --> 00:01:03,731
We're going to go
to Charlie and Alan's house.
36
00:01:03,797 --> 00:01:04,998
It's a wonderful place
37
00:01:05,065 --> 00:01:07,401
where those awful people
will never find us.
38
00:01:09,837 --> 00:01:12,106
So, Frankie...
39
00:01:12,173 --> 00:01:14,942
why didn't you tell us
you had a daughter?
40
00:01:15,008 --> 00:01:18,011
Okay, guys, here's the deal.
41
00:01:18,078 --> 00:01:20,814
I didn't want you to know.
42
00:01:22,350 --> 00:01:25,119
Okay. I feel better.
43
00:01:25,186 --> 00:01:26,987
I'm sorry.
It's a long story.
44
00:01:27,054 --> 00:01:28,922
We got time.
I'm not doing anything.
45
00:01:28,989 --> 00:01:29,990
Alan, doing anything?
46
00:01:30,057 --> 00:01:31,825
No, I'm free.
47
00:01:31,892 --> 00:01:35,028
I was staying with my
grandma and grandpa
who are really rich,
48
00:01:35,095 --> 00:01:38,566
and they don't want my
mom to have me, so they
said she's crazy.
49
00:01:40,301 --> 00:01:42,570
That wasn't so long.
50
00:01:42,636 --> 00:01:44,805
Could we please talk
about this later?
51
00:01:44,872 --> 00:01:47,941
Okay. What shall we talk about?
52
00:01:48,008 --> 00:01:50,278
Are you guys gay?
53
00:01:54,014 --> 00:01:57,151
Isn't she something?
54
00:01:57,218 --> 00:02:00,120
* Men, men, men, men,
manly men *
55
00:02:00,188 --> 00:02:03,157
* Men... *
56
00:02:05,859 --> 00:02:07,728
Okay, here we are.
57
00:02:07,795 --> 00:02:09,297
This is it, right?
58
00:02:09,363 --> 00:02:12,032
One kid, no pets?
59
00:02:12,099 --> 00:02:13,567
Far as I know.
60
00:02:14,568 --> 00:02:16,804
Can I go look
at the ocean?
61
00:02:16,870 --> 00:02:18,206
Sure, just stay on the deck.
62
00:02:22,676 --> 00:02:24,712
Okay, who has
the first question?
63
00:02:27,548 --> 00:02:28,516
Alan?
64
00:02:28,582 --> 00:02:31,385
Thank you, um...
65
00:02:31,452 --> 00:02:33,321
What the hell is going on?
66
00:02:33,387 --> 00:02:35,556
Ooh, good one.
Mm.
67
00:02:35,623 --> 00:02:38,025
Here it is. I married
a really rich guy,
68
00:02:38,091 --> 00:02:39,327
and his parents always hated me.
69
00:02:39,393 --> 00:02:40,961
I don't know, maybe
it was because
70
00:02:41,028 --> 00:02:43,797
when we met, he was on the road
to becoming a US Congressman,
71
00:02:43,864 --> 00:02:45,032
and I was just...
72
00:02:45,098 --> 00:02:47,501
you know, on the road.
73
00:02:47,568 --> 00:02:50,003
Joanie, get off
the rail, honey!
74
00:02:50,070 --> 00:02:53,241
Anyway, they were not happy
when we got married
75
00:02:53,307 --> 00:02:54,375
and they were even less happy
76
00:02:54,442 --> 00:02:56,244
when we used part
of his trust fund
77
00:02:56,310 --> 00:02:58,011
to finance
my recording career.
78
00:02:58,078 --> 00:02:59,380
You're a singer?
79
00:02:59,447 --> 00:03:01,515
Well, as it turns out, no,
but, um...
80
00:03:03,451 --> 00:03:05,152
...then two years ago,
Brad died, and ever since,
81
00:03:05,219 --> 00:03:07,988
his parents have been trying
to take Joanie away from me.
82
00:03:08,055 --> 00:03:09,290
So, the-the psychiatrist...?
83
00:03:09,357 --> 00:03:10,924
Court-ordered.
84
00:03:10,991 --> 00:03:13,994
They're suing me for custody,
saying I'm an unfit parent.
85
00:03:14,061 --> 00:03:15,062
Unfit how?
86
00:03:15,128 --> 00:03:17,365
You know...
( shrieks )
87
00:03:18,866 --> 00:03:20,334
I'm not a lawyer, uh...
88
00:03:20,401 --> 00:03:22,202
but taking a baseball bat
to the shrink's Beemer
89
00:03:22,270 --> 00:03:24,872
might not have helped your case.
90
00:03:24,938 --> 00:03:27,140
Yeah, they'll probably spin
that one in their favor...
91
00:03:27,207 --> 00:03:28,676
but I was screwed anyway
92
00:03:28,742 --> 00:03:31,111
'cause they were paying him
to make me look bad.
93
00:03:31,178 --> 00:03:32,112
That's horrible.
94
00:03:32,179 --> 00:03:33,347
So, what are your plans now?
95
00:03:33,414 --> 00:03:35,148
I don't know.
I didn't think past
96
00:03:35,215 --> 00:03:36,550
just getting her
out of there.
97
00:03:36,617 --> 00:03:37,718
Well, you know, you
don't have to know.
98
00:03:37,785 --> 00:03:39,152
You can stay here
for a while
99
00:03:39,219 --> 00:03:40,220
and figure it out,
right, Charlie?
100
00:03:40,288 --> 00:03:41,689
Absolutely.
101
00:03:41,755 --> 00:03:44,224
Thank you.
That'd be great.
102
00:03:44,292 --> 00:03:45,893
I'll go tell Joanie.
103
00:03:45,959 --> 00:03:48,228
Terrific.
104
00:03:48,296 --> 00:03:51,665
We're happy to have you.
105
00:03:51,732 --> 00:03:53,834
Okay, we got to get her
out of here.
106
00:03:55,269 --> 00:03:57,271
Charlie, she needs us.
107
00:03:57,338 --> 00:03:59,273
She doesn't need us;
she needs a lawyer...
108
00:03:59,340 --> 00:04:00,541
and probably a new shrink.
109
00:04:00,608 --> 00:04:03,311
Well, then,
we'll get her those.
110
00:04:03,377 --> 00:04:05,078
Okay, at this point,
I think I'd like to stop
111
00:04:05,145 --> 00:04:06,280
using the word "we."
112
00:04:06,347 --> 00:04:07,781
Oh, oh, you're going
to bail on her?
113
00:04:07,848 --> 00:04:09,917
Two days ago, you couldn't wait
to get her in bed.
114
00:04:09,983 --> 00:04:12,386
That's because two
days ago, she was
just a crazy stranger.
115
00:04:13,387 --> 00:04:14,655
And if I remember
correctly,
116
00:04:14,722 --> 00:04:15,856
you couldn't wait
to get rid of her.
117
00:04:15,923 --> 00:04:18,025
Yes, because she was
a crazy stranger,
118
00:04:18,091 --> 00:04:20,494
but now that I've gotten
to know her, I want her to stay.
119
00:04:20,561 --> 00:04:21,829
All right, Alan,
but I'm warning you:
120
00:04:21,895 --> 00:04:24,031
this girl's got
a lot of baggage,
121
00:04:24,097 --> 00:04:27,568
and I don't know if you
have enough skycaps
to get her to the curb.
122
00:04:29,303 --> 00:04:31,405
What?
123
00:04:34,274 --> 00:04:36,344
So, Joanie,
124
00:04:36,410 --> 00:04:37,311
what grade are you in?
125
00:04:37,378 --> 00:04:38,211
Second.
126
00:04:38,278 --> 00:04:39,313
Oh, really? Uh, I have
127
00:04:39,380 --> 00:04:40,581
a little boy who's in fourth.
128
00:04:40,648 --> 00:04:42,015
So?
129
00:04:43,283 --> 00:04:45,052
I, uh... I-I don't know.
130
00:04:45,118 --> 00:04:47,655
I thought it'd be germane
to the conversation.
131
00:04:49,189 --> 00:04:53,594
Wow, doesn't matter how old
they are, you still strike out.
132
00:04:56,129 --> 00:04:59,333
You know, you are
just as pretty as your mom.
133
00:04:59,400 --> 00:05:00,868
So?
134
00:05:02,269 --> 00:05:04,372
I bow to the master.
135
00:05:05,873 --> 00:05:08,476
Hold on. Let me finish...
( knocking )
136
00:05:08,542 --> 00:05:11,379
All right, I'm going to say this
one more time real slow
137
00:05:11,445 --> 00:05:13,246
so there's no confusion.
138
00:05:13,313 --> 00:05:14,815
You can take
your damn money
139
00:05:14,882 --> 00:05:17,317
and stick it up your
white bread, country club,
140
00:05:17,385 --> 00:05:20,421
Tournament of Roses,
liposuctioned ass.
141
00:05:21,389 --> 00:05:23,190
Hi.
142
00:05:23,256 --> 00:05:24,558
Hi...
143
00:05:26,460 --> 00:05:27,528
Really? I'm garbage.
144
00:05:27,595 --> 00:05:29,129
Uh, is Alan here?
145
00:05:29,196 --> 00:05:30,197
Yeah.
146
00:05:30,263 --> 00:05:32,032
Really? Oh, is that right?
147
00:05:32,099 --> 00:05:37,070
Well, I got news for you, lady:
the term is white trash.
148
00:05:37,137 --> 00:05:38,539
Do you know her?
149
00:05:38,606 --> 00:05:41,041
Nope, that's a new one.
150
00:05:41,108 --> 00:05:42,342
Hey, Dad.
151
00:05:42,410 --> 00:05:44,478
Jake, Judith, what
are you doing here?
152
00:05:44,545 --> 00:05:46,079
Alan, I told you yesterday
153
00:05:46,146 --> 00:05:47,381
I was going to visit my parents.
154
00:05:47,448 --> 00:05:49,016
Dad's having
another colonoscopy,
155
00:05:49,082 --> 00:05:51,985
and if I'm not there,
I'll have to watch the video.
156
00:05:52,052 --> 00:05:54,988
Oh, yeah, I'm sorry,
there's just been a
lot of stuff going on.
157
00:05:55,055 --> 00:05:57,658
Yeah. I just met
your brother's latest stuff.
158
00:05:57,725 --> 00:05:59,827
Why do you assume
it's his stuff?
159
00:05:59,893 --> 00:06:00,728
What, is it yours?
160
00:06:00,794 --> 00:06:02,295
No, but it's
not his, either.
161
00:06:02,362 --> 00:06:04,097
But it could be.
162
00:06:04,164 --> 00:06:05,265
Says who?
163
00:06:05,332 --> 00:06:06,400
Says your ex-wife.
164
00:06:06,467 --> 00:06:08,368
Okay, I don't need
to hear this.
165
00:06:08,436 --> 00:06:10,103
Jake, honey,
have a good time, hmm?
166
00:06:10,170 --> 00:06:12,706
Charlie... behave yourself.
167
00:06:13,541 --> 00:06:14,808
What about me?
168
00:06:14,875 --> 00:06:17,545
I am completely capable
of having my own stuff.
169
00:06:18,446 --> 00:06:20,213
Hi, I'm Joanie.
170
00:06:20,280 --> 00:06:22,950
Hey. I'm going to go
play in my room.
171
00:06:23,016 --> 00:06:23,817
Can I come with you?
172
00:06:23,884 --> 00:06:24,885
Whatever.
173
00:06:26,253 --> 00:06:29,089
If he can just keep that
attitude for another 30 years,
174
00:06:29,156 --> 00:06:31,124
he's gold.
175
00:06:32,626 --> 00:06:34,261
I'm not afraid of your lawyers
or your shrinks.
176
00:06:34,327 --> 00:06:36,430
Fine, bring 'em on,
177
00:06:36,497 --> 00:06:37,665
'cause you know what?
178
00:06:37,731 --> 00:06:40,033
We're going to run away
and hide.
179
00:06:40,100 --> 00:06:43,270
Okay, now they're
really unhappy with me.
180
00:06:43,336 --> 00:06:44,738
Is there anything we can do?
181
00:06:44,805 --> 00:06:47,441
No, thanks,
you've already done so much.
182
00:06:47,508 --> 00:06:48,809
I just hate to put you out
like this.
183
00:06:48,876 --> 00:06:50,043
Oh, oh, it is not a problem.
184
00:06:50,110 --> 00:06:51,178
We have plenty of space.
185
00:06:51,244 --> 00:06:53,246
Uh, you and Joanie can stay
in my room,
186
00:06:53,313 --> 00:06:55,415
and, uh, I'll bunk
with Charlie.
187
00:06:57,350 --> 00:07:00,454
You'll bunk
with Charlie?
188
00:07:00,521 --> 00:07:03,390
Hold on there, Pecos Bill.
189
00:07:03,457 --> 00:07:06,594
No, it'll be fun,
like when we were kids.
190
00:07:07,294 --> 00:07:08,496
Well, okay...
191
00:07:08,562 --> 00:07:10,063
but just remember,
192
00:07:10,130 --> 00:07:13,634
this time Mom won't be around
to hear you scream.
193
00:07:17,370 --> 00:07:18,906
Why are those people here?
194
00:07:18,972 --> 00:07:20,474
Well, they're going
through a tough time,
195
00:07:20,541 --> 00:07:21,675
and we're helping them out.
196
00:07:21,742 --> 00:07:23,644
That girl is really annoying.
197
00:07:23,711 --> 00:07:26,847
I think maybe
she has a crush on you.
198
00:07:26,914 --> 00:07:30,083
Well, yeah,
that's what's annoying.
199
00:07:30,150 --> 00:07:33,320
You don't really
like girls yet, huh?
200
00:07:33,386 --> 00:07:34,722
No, I like girls.
201
00:07:34,788 --> 00:07:37,758
I'm just not
into eight-year-olds.
202
00:07:43,296 --> 00:07:45,198
Is, uh, is Joanie okay?
203
00:07:45,265 --> 00:07:48,502
Yeah. She fell asleep as soon
as her head hit the pillow.
204
00:07:48,569 --> 00:07:50,370
Well, it was a long day for her.
205
00:07:50,437 --> 00:07:52,039
Yeah.
206
00:07:52,105 --> 00:07:54,274
Well, the good news is
I think my in-laws
207
00:07:54,341 --> 00:07:55,776
are going to back off.
208
00:07:55,843 --> 00:07:57,077
Oh.
209
00:07:57,144 --> 00:08:01,081
The bad news is
that wasn't my shrink's car.
210
00:08:01,148 --> 00:08:03,584
Yeah, well,
we all make mistakes...
211
00:08:05,185 --> 00:08:08,255
...but at least you
made this one for
the right reason.
212
00:08:08,321 --> 00:08:09,923
You love your daughter.
213
00:08:12,125 --> 00:08:14,895
I just wish I knew
where we go from here,
214
00:08:14,962 --> 00:08:17,565
'cause I know I seem
like I've got it all together,
215
00:08:17,631 --> 00:08:21,101
but this is...
216
00:08:21,168 --> 00:08:23,103
this is a little...
217
00:08:23,170 --> 00:08:24,237
Scary?
218
00:08:24,304 --> 00:08:25,272
Yeah.
Yeah.
219
00:08:25,338 --> 00:08:26,907
Well, I understand.
220
00:08:26,974 --> 00:08:31,078
I mean, uh, when
my marriage ended,
I was terrified.
221
00:08:32,312 --> 00:08:34,514
Um, it-it's the unknown.
222
00:08:34,582 --> 00:08:36,283
Yeah...
223
00:08:36,349 --> 00:08:39,252
Oh, no, don't, don't...
224
00:08:39,319 --> 00:08:40,888
Now, don't cry. Don't cry.
225
00:08:40,954 --> 00:08:44,692
Um... everything'll
work out, you'll see.
226
00:09:04,778 --> 00:09:07,948
( sniffles )
227
00:09:09,482 --> 00:09:11,585
What's the matter?
228
00:09:11,652 --> 00:09:13,887
I don't know.
229
00:09:13,954 --> 00:09:17,124
It's been so long since
anybody's touched me.
230
00:09:58,131 --> 00:10:00,567
Alan?
Yeah?
231
00:10:00,634 --> 00:10:04,938
It's been so long
since anybody's touched me.
232
00:10:11,011 --> 00:10:12,512
How much did you see?
233
00:10:12,579 --> 00:10:17,350
Just enough to make sleep
impossible.
234
00:10:17,417 --> 00:10:19,386
Okay, that's great.
235
00:10:19,452 --> 00:10:22,122
I am dying to
talk about this.
236
00:10:22,189 --> 00:10:25,158
All we did was kiss, but,
oh, Charlie, what a kiss.
237
00:10:25,225 --> 00:10:27,327
It-it-it was like our
souls were merging.
238
00:10:27,394 --> 00:10:30,130
That was saliva, Alan.
239
00:10:30,197 --> 00:10:31,865
No, no, seriously,
Frankie is incredible.
240
00:10:31,932 --> 00:10:33,867
I mean, think about it.
241
00:10:33,934 --> 00:10:37,170
First, she loses her
husband, then she has to
fight to keep her daughter,
242
00:10:37,237 --> 00:10:40,708
and yet still, she has
such incredible spirit,
such-such joie de vivre.
243
00:10:40,774 --> 00:10:43,243
Okay, would you like
to hear my take on this?
244
00:10:43,310 --> 00:10:46,714
Is it positive and
life-affirming?
245
00:10:46,780 --> 00:10:48,248
Good night, Alan.
246
00:10:49,382 --> 00:10:52,686
Okay, no... tell me
what you think.
247
00:10:52,753 --> 00:10:55,188
All right. I've known you
all your life,
248
00:10:55,255 --> 00:10:57,157
and if there's one thing
I've noticed,
249
00:10:57,224 --> 00:11:00,393
you are a stone sucker
for the damsel in distress.
250
00:11:00,460 --> 00:11:01,729
I am not.
251
00:11:01,795 --> 00:11:03,296
Oh, come on, Alan,
every woman
252
00:11:03,363 --> 00:11:06,133
you've ever been involved with
has been damaged and needy.
253
00:11:06,199 --> 00:11:09,336
Wait, wait, what
about, um, uh...
254
00:11:09,402 --> 00:11:11,238
Okay, go on.
255
00:11:11,304 --> 00:11:14,141
You devote all your time
and energy into fixing 'em up
256
00:11:14,207 --> 00:11:16,143
instead of doing
the humane thing,
257
00:11:16,209 --> 00:11:19,780
which is to have sex with 'em
and run away.
258
00:11:19,847 --> 00:11:22,515
Exactly how is that
the humane thing?
259
00:11:22,582 --> 00:11:24,184
My way, they have a good time;
260
00:11:24,251 --> 00:11:26,153
you have a good time;
nobody suffers.
261
00:11:26,219 --> 00:11:30,190
Your way, you get married;
you take over their lives;
262
00:11:30,257 --> 00:11:33,260
they start to hate you, and
you end up moving in with me.
263
00:11:34,361 --> 00:11:36,363
You know what, Charlie?
264
00:11:36,429 --> 00:11:38,131
I think you're jealous.
265
00:11:38,198 --> 00:11:39,399
Of who?
266
00:11:39,466 --> 00:11:41,468
Of me! For the first time
in our lives,
267
00:11:41,534 --> 00:11:44,404
a woman picked me over you,
and you can't deal with it.
268
00:11:44,471 --> 00:11:45,672
I can deal with it.
269
00:11:45,739 --> 00:11:48,341
I don't get it,
but I can deal with it.
270
00:11:48,408 --> 00:11:50,477
I feel sorry for you.
271
00:11:50,543 --> 00:11:54,647
I feel sorry that your heart
has become so hard and small
272
00:11:54,714 --> 00:11:58,151
that you've lost the capacity to
connect with another human being
273
00:11:58,218 --> 00:12:00,253
on any level any more meaningful
274
00:12:00,320 --> 00:12:03,356
than the inebriated exchange
of bodily fluids.
275
00:12:05,926 --> 00:12:08,661
Boy, leave it to you
to take a beautiful thing
276
00:12:08,728 --> 00:12:11,331
like drunken sex
and make it sound dirty.
277
00:12:13,200 --> 00:12:15,468
I don't know why I even
bother talking to you.
278
00:12:19,406 --> 00:12:21,842
Alan?
What?
279
00:12:21,909 --> 00:12:26,213
I thought we had a pact
to never go to bed mad.
280
00:12:28,281 --> 00:12:30,851
Leave me alone.
281
00:12:30,918 --> 00:12:35,488
Come on... don't you
want to spoon?
282
00:12:35,555 --> 00:12:40,360
I swear to God you're
going to lose that hand.
283
00:12:40,427 --> 00:12:42,429
That's not my hand.
284
00:12:42,495 --> 00:12:44,497
Mom!
285
00:12:51,071 --> 00:12:52,405
Do you know where Jake is?
286
00:12:52,472 --> 00:12:55,042
No, honey, I'm sorry.
287
00:12:55,108 --> 00:12:57,110
We're playing Hide and Seek.
288
00:12:57,177 --> 00:12:58,912
Well, I don't know
where he's hiding.
289
00:12:58,979 --> 00:13:03,083
No, I was hiding,
and he was supposed to find me.
290
00:13:04,051 --> 00:13:07,187
It's been over an hour.
291
00:13:07,254 --> 00:13:09,489
If I see him,
I'll let him know.
292
00:13:09,556 --> 00:13:10,690
Thank you.
293
00:13:10,757 --> 00:13:13,360
You're welcome.
294
00:13:15,728 --> 00:13:18,431
You're welcome.
295
00:13:20,400 --> 00:13:21,801
Mornin'.
296
00:13:21,869 --> 00:13:23,937
Morning.
297
00:13:47,494 --> 00:13:49,462
Coffee? Coffee.
298
00:13:49,529 --> 00:13:50,497
Thanks.
299
00:13:51,598 --> 00:13:53,200
So, uh... I thought
300
00:13:53,266 --> 00:13:54,834
maybe today, uh, you, me,
and the kids
301
00:13:54,902 --> 00:13:56,403
might go do something fun.
302
00:13:56,469 --> 00:13:57,504
What about Charlie?
303
00:13:57,570 --> 00:14:00,273
He's had his fun.
304
00:14:00,340 --> 00:14:03,543
Hey, I know! Uh, why don't
we go to Will Rogers State
Park and have a picnic?
305
00:14:03,610 --> 00:14:05,378
Oh, that sounds nice.
306
00:14:05,445 --> 00:14:07,981
Oh, great, great.
307
00:14:10,217 --> 00:14:12,085
Morning.
BOTH:
Morning.
308
00:14:21,594 --> 00:14:23,696
Oh, man.
309
00:14:23,763 --> 00:14:25,165
I'm the extra guy.
310
00:14:26,266 --> 00:14:29,369
No, don't call
yourself extra.
311
00:14:29,436 --> 00:14:31,071
Try superfluous.
312
00:14:32,272 --> 00:14:36,376
Fifth wheel, 11th toe,
third nipple.
313
00:14:36,443 --> 00:14:38,045
Alan!
314
00:14:38,111 --> 00:14:39,746
Interesting.
315
00:14:39,812 --> 00:14:40,914
What's interesting?
316
00:14:40,981 --> 00:14:42,382
This is new for me.
317
00:14:43,816 --> 00:14:45,652
Don't really like it.
318
00:14:47,220 --> 00:14:49,822
Charlie, you're
a great guy, but...
319
00:14:49,889 --> 00:14:51,024
No, no, no, please, stop.
320
00:14:51,091 --> 00:14:53,193
Do not call me a great guy.
321
00:14:53,260 --> 00:14:55,963
That's what you call
the schmuck loser friend
322
00:14:56,029 --> 00:14:59,132
who has to dance with
the hot chick's ugly cousin.
323
00:15:03,436 --> 00:15:05,138
What?
324
00:15:05,205 --> 00:15:09,943
Well... I'm just having
a really good day.
325
00:15:12,545 --> 00:15:15,215
Hey, you coming on the picnic,
Uncle Charlie?
326
00:15:15,282 --> 00:15:18,385
Nah, couldn't find a date.
327
00:15:19,953 --> 00:15:22,789
Mom wants to know if you want
egg salad or tuna for lunch.
328
00:15:22,855 --> 00:15:23,490
Tuna.
329
00:15:23,556 --> 00:15:25,592
Me, too.
330
00:15:28,528 --> 00:15:31,131
God, she's annoying.
331
00:15:31,198 --> 00:15:34,734
At least you're not
a third nipple.
332
00:15:34,801 --> 00:15:37,037
Jake, why don't you go
in the kitchen and help Joanie
333
00:15:37,104 --> 00:15:39,072
pick out some snacks
for the picnic basket.
334
00:15:45,645 --> 00:15:47,247
You sure you don't want to come
with us?
335
00:15:47,314 --> 00:15:49,316
Do you really want me
to come with you?
336
00:15:49,382 --> 00:15:51,484
No, I was just being polite.
337
00:15:52,585 --> 00:15:54,221
Listen, Frankie...
338
00:15:54,287 --> 00:15:56,623
we need to talk
about you and Alan.
339
00:15:56,689 --> 00:15:59,259
Oh, come on, stud,
340
00:15:59,326 --> 00:16:01,161
you're not jealous, are you?
341
00:16:01,228 --> 00:16:03,963
No, no. Dumbfounded, maybe.
342
00:16:04,031 --> 00:16:08,101
Mystified, astounded,
flabbergasted,
but not jealous.
343
00:16:09,269 --> 00:16:10,570
I just want to make sure
344
00:16:10,637 --> 00:16:12,239
that you understand
how vulnerable he is.
345
00:16:12,305 --> 00:16:14,874
You don't think
I'm vulnerable, too?
346
00:16:14,941 --> 00:16:16,509
Maybe you haven't noticed,
Charlie,
347
00:16:16,576 --> 00:16:20,013
but I-I'm wrapped tighter
than an airport sandwich.
348
00:16:20,080 --> 00:16:22,015
All right,
let me put it this way.
349
00:16:22,082 --> 00:16:24,151
My brother is crazy about you.
350
00:16:24,217 --> 00:16:27,487
Well, I'm crazy
about him, too.
351
00:16:27,554 --> 00:16:30,023
No, you don't understand.
Alan's a nester.
352
00:16:30,090 --> 00:16:32,092
He's already imagining
the two of you
353
00:16:32,159 --> 00:16:34,161
walking through IKEA
picking out flatware
354
00:16:34,227 --> 00:16:35,762
and throw pillows.
355
00:16:35,828 --> 00:16:37,197
Come on...
356
00:16:37,264 --> 00:16:40,200
He did it with me!
357
00:16:43,303 --> 00:16:45,538
You really care
about him, don't you?
358
00:16:47,307 --> 00:16:48,475
Yes.
359
00:16:49,542 --> 00:16:52,445
You're a great
guy, Charlie.
360
00:16:58,085 --> 00:17:01,088
"Great guy" and a kiss
on the cheek.
361
00:17:01,154 --> 00:17:06,059
Why doesn't she just kick me
in the balls?
362
00:17:08,761 --> 00:17:10,663
Want to play tag?
No.
363
00:17:10,730 --> 00:17:12,031
Hide and Seek?
No.
364
00:17:12,099 --> 00:17:14,301
Want to chase me?
No.
365
00:17:15,335 --> 00:17:17,337
Well, the kids are
having a great time.
366
00:17:17,404 --> 00:17:20,173
This was a wonderful idea, Alan.
Thank you.
367
00:17:20,240 --> 00:17:22,275
Hey, what makes it wonderful
is the company.
368
00:17:22,342 --> 00:17:25,578
Aw, do you always say
exactly the right thing?
369
00:17:26,713 --> 00:17:28,248
I don't know.
I, uh... I suppose
370
00:17:28,315 --> 00:17:31,318
I-I-I try to be, uh,
sensitive to the moment
371
00:17:31,384 --> 00:17:33,986
and, uh, weigh my words
372
00:17:34,053 --> 00:17:35,222
so that their, uh,
emotional imp...
373
00:17:35,288 --> 00:17:38,057
No, not always.
374
00:17:41,761 --> 00:17:43,029
Um...
375
00:17:43,096 --> 00:17:45,165
listen... uh, Frankie,
376
00:17:45,232 --> 00:17:47,700
I-I was... I was
thinking, um...
377
00:17:47,767 --> 00:17:52,672
we get along so well, and-and
our kids get along, and since
378
00:17:52,739 --> 00:17:54,874
n-neither one
of us really has
our own place...
379
00:17:54,941 --> 00:17:56,476
Oh, Alan...
380
00:18:00,947 --> 00:18:02,482
Absolutely not.
381
00:18:03,250 --> 00:18:05,017
But...
No, my life
382
00:18:05,084 --> 00:18:08,188
is such a mess, and I got to
straighten out a bunch of things
383
00:18:08,255 --> 00:18:11,391
before I can even think
about a relationship.
384
00:18:11,458 --> 00:18:14,161
Yes, yes, you-you've
got a lot of baggage,
385
00:18:14,227 --> 00:18:18,465
but it-it's nothing I
can't get to the curb.
386
00:18:19,566 --> 00:18:20,567
What?
387
00:18:20,633 --> 00:18:22,169
It's something
Charlie said.
388
00:18:22,235 --> 00:18:23,803
I was hoping you'd
know what it meant.
389
00:18:24,904 --> 00:18:27,207
Well, Alan, um...
390
00:18:27,274 --> 00:18:29,242
I talked to my brother
in Seattle today,
391
00:18:29,309 --> 00:18:33,045
and he and his wife
are going
392
00:18:33,112 --> 00:18:36,115
to put me and Joanie up
for a while.
393
00:18:37,016 --> 00:18:38,285
Oh, you're leaving.
394
00:18:38,351 --> 00:18:39,819
Tomorrow morning.
395
00:18:41,488 --> 00:18:43,823
'Cause, you know, I can
enroll her in school there,
396
00:18:43,890 --> 00:18:47,894
and get a job, and start putting
my life back together again.
397
00:18:47,960 --> 00:18:51,398
Yeah, no, um...
that-that makes sense. Sure.
398
00:18:52,499 --> 00:18:53,800
I'm sorry.
399
00:18:53,866 --> 00:18:57,470
Oh, no, uh-uh, you're doing
the right thing.
400
00:18:57,537 --> 00:18:59,339
Look on the bright side, Alan.
401
00:18:59,406 --> 00:19:01,241
What bright side?
402
00:19:02,242 --> 00:19:05,412
You're going to get laid
tonight.
403
00:19:18,558 --> 00:19:20,593
Okay, hon, the cab's waiting.
Say good-bye to Jake.
404
00:19:21,093 --> 00:19:23,863
Bye, Jake.
Bye.
405
00:19:26,098 --> 00:19:28,235
Aw, man!
406
00:19:28,301 --> 00:19:30,203
Charlie, what can I say?
407
00:19:30,270 --> 00:19:33,373
I know. I'm a great guy.
408
00:19:37,076 --> 00:19:40,012
Aw, man!
409
00:19:40,079 --> 00:19:43,049
You know, I-I would've
been happy to drive
you to the airport.
410
00:19:43,115 --> 00:19:45,184
No, it's better
to say good-bye here,
411
00:19:45,252 --> 00:19:47,854
'cause LAX is hectic
and crazy,
412
00:19:47,920 --> 00:19:49,489
and the underwire in my bra
413
00:19:49,556 --> 00:19:51,791
always sets off
the metal detectors.
414
00:19:53,693 --> 00:19:56,729
You know, this doesn't
have to be good-bye forever.
415
00:19:56,796 --> 00:19:59,198
Once we get all settled,
you can come visit us.
416
00:20:00,099 --> 00:20:01,334
Sure.
417
00:20:16,249 --> 00:20:17,517
Bye.
418
00:20:18,618 --> 00:20:20,219
Bye.
419
00:20:35,067 --> 00:20:38,871
( knocking )
420
00:20:38,938 --> 00:20:41,007
Here. I'm running late.
421
00:20:52,985 --> 00:20:55,388
It's tough seeing her go,
isn't it?
422
00:20:55,455 --> 00:20:57,023
Yeah, I'm really going
423
00:20:57,089 --> 00:20:58,958
to miss Joanie.
29586
Can't find what you're looking for?
Get subtitles in any language from opensubtitles.com, and translate them here.
Afrikaans
Akan
Albanian
Amharic
Arabic
Armenian
Azerbaijani
Basque
Belarusian
Bemba
Bengali
Bihari
Bosnian
Breton
Bulgarian
Cambodian
Catalan
Cebuano
Cherokee
Chichewa
Chinese (Simplified)
Chinese (Traditional)
Corsican
Croatian
Czech
Danish
Dutch
English
Esperanto
Estonian
Faroese
Finnish
Galician
Georgian
German
Greek
Guarani
Haitian Creole
Hausa
Hawaiian
Hebrew
Hmong
Hungarian
Icelandic
Indonesian
Irish
Italian
Japanese
Kazakh
Kinyarwanda
Kirundi
Kongo
Korean
Krio (Sierra Leone)
Kurdish
Kyrgyz
Laothian
Latin
Latvian
Lithuanian
Luganda
Luo
Luxembourgish
Macedonian
Malagasy
Malay
Maltese
Maori
Mauritian Creole
Moldavian
Mongolian
Myanmar (Burmese)
Montenegrin
Nepali
Norwegian
Pashto
Persian
Polish
Portuguese (Brazil)
Portuguese (Portugal)
Quechua
Romanian
Romansh
Russian
Samoan
Scots Gaelic
Serbian
Sesotho
Setswana
Seychellois Creole
Shona
Sindhi
Sinhalese
Slovak
Slovenian
Somali
Spanish
Tajik
Thai
Tigrinya
Tonga
Turkish
Turkmen
Ukrainian
Uzbek
Vietnamese
Welsh
Wolof