All language subtitles for The X-Files s05e05

You're floodin' it, Booger.

For God's sake, Izzy.

Here she comes. Let's go.

Come on, man. Come on.

- You gotta be kiddin'.
- What?

"What" me and you won't go
to no comic-book convention.

I'm 18. I can go anywhere I want.

Yeah, but where you gonna live
when you get back?

Mom, we gotta get goin'.

Drive careful, Booger.
He's the only son I've got.

OK, Mrs B.

I’ll introduce you
to a woman

who was delivered the surprise of her life.

After what seemed like a normal pregnancy,

doctors delivered to Delores
a very special child.

A mother of two beautiful children,

Delores held in her arms a boy with fur
like a dog and a hairline like Eddie Munster.

She's here with us today with her real-life,
but sleeping wolf baby.

Why not just give him
a razor and some shaving cream?

He'll be shaving in a few years, anyway.

Well, actually, he seems to be
quite allergic to shaving cream.

..seem to like it.
They like to come up and touch his hair.

- So they don't tease him?
- No, he's quite popular.

Dandruff a problem?

No, I wash his hair twice a day,
and brush a hundred strokes a night.

I can't believe this.

I think the question the audience
really wants answered is,

what does the father look like?

- The father is completely bald.
- Completely?

Loneliness

Hello?

Is the cloak you wear

Who's there?

A deep shade of blue

ls always there

The sun ain’t gonna shine any more

The moon ain‘t gonna rise in the sky

The tears are always clouding your eyes

When you’re without love

"Dear Special Agent Mulder,
I'm writing to you for help."

"Several years ago,
I had an experience I could not explain."

"I was lying in my bed
when I felt a presence in the room."

"Though I was awake, I felt that something
had taken control over my body.”

"I don't remember much else, but I woke up
three days later pregnant with my son Izzy."

"That was 18 years ago
but now it happened again."

"I was in bed,
and could swear I heard Cher singing."

"The one who was married to Sonny."

"Then the room got all smoky
and I saw some kind of monster."

"He had a really gross face
with lumps all over his head."

"I was too scared to scream. Then I got
all groggy and conked out for three days."

"Guess what happened when I woke up."

"I got your name off the TV."

"Some lady on the Jerry Springer Show
who had a werewolf baby

said you came to her house."

"I got her story beat by a mile,
so maybe you'll want to come see me, too."

"Sincerely, Shaineh Berkowitz."

Scully, do you think it's too soon
to get my own 1-900 number?

Did you actually see that werewolf baby
or was that just a story?

No, it had something
called hypertrichosis lanuginosa.

It's a rare hereditary condition,

most commonly found
in some South American families.

Uh-huh. But it was all hairy and stuff?

Uh, Mrs Berkowitz,
you said that you also had a son?

Mm-hm. Izzy. That's him there.

And Izzy is the product of
your union with some kind of intruder?

I don't know about no "union",
but I sure woke up in a condition.

- Did you report this to the police?
- Of course I did.

Was there an investigation?

Not really.
Nobody here ever locks their doors.

And it took me a month or two
to figure it out - that I was pregnant.

And now you're pregnant again?

Uh-huh. But as I told Agent Mulder
on the phone, that's what takes the cake.

Mrs Berkowitz had
a tubal ligation two years ago.

You can't plant a seed in a barren field.

They were cookin' somethin' on the range.

Took me two clays
of scrubbin' to clean the skillet.

I don't know how many
of 'em there were. I only saw one,

but they ate a whole jar of peanut butter.

You were gone three days,
but nobody missed you?

- I know what you're thinkin'.
- Do you drink, Mrs Berkowitz?

No. But I'm not so sure my intruders,
as you call 'em, didn't have a few.

Somebody set a tumbler here
and didn't use no coaster.

That's a family heirloom, too.

Is there no chance
your son could've put it there?

Izzy's got more brains than that.
Not much more, but he values his life.

That pigsty there's his room.

You know what this thing is,
don't you, Agent Mulder?

- Why do you say that?
- Because. You're all quiet and stuff.

And you know somethin'
you're not sayin' - about alien abductions.

They said on Jerry Springer
you're, like, an expert.

Well, I don't think this has
anything to do with alien abductions.

- I don't know if I believe in that any more.
- Oh, come on!

- Really?
- Mrs Berkowitz?

You gave a description of the intruder,

saying he had a gross face
and lumps on his head?

And two mouths.
I don't know if I mentioned that.

Funny. Sounds just like this.

Oh, that?

That's the Great Mutato.

That's a comic-book character
my kid Izzy created.

What's goin' on?

These are Agents Mulder
and Scully from the FBI.

The Federal Bureau of Investigation?

We were wondering how this suspect
in your mother's case looks exactly like this.

- The Great Mutato.
- Because I've seen him too.

You've seen the Great Mutato?

Yeah. A lot of people around here have.

Has it crossed neither of your minds
that what you say you saw

fits perfectly with
this creature that your son created?

Well, yeah, but...

that don't mean it didn't happen.

Don't ask me why, but it works.

Peanut butter sandwiches?

You think bologna would be more effective?

Why are you humouring them, Mulder?

I'm not, Scully. This is a very serious crime.

So is perjury. So is calling out
FBI agents under false pretenses.

- For the purpose of what?
- Isn't it obvious?

for whom daytime talk shows
and tabloid headlines

have become a reality
against which they measure their lives.

A culture so obsessed by the media
and a chance for self-dramatization

that they'll do anything
to gain a spotlight.

I am alarmed that you would reduce
these people to a cultural stereotype.

Not everybody's dream
is to get on Jerry Springer.

Psychologists often speak of
the denial of an unthinkable evil

or a misplacement of shared fears.

Anxieties taking the form
of a hideous monster

for whom the most horrific
human attributes can be ascribed.

What... what we can't
possibly imagine ourselves capable of,

we can blame on the ogre,
on the hunchback, on the lowly half-breed.

Common sense will tell you these legends,
these unverified rumours, are ridiculous.

But nonetheless, unverifiable,

and thus true in the sense
that they're believed to be true.

Is there anything you don't believe in?

Sh!

What's that sound?

It's the Great Mutato!

- Where'd it go?
- I don't know. I lost it.

There. Up there.

Turn that damn thing off!

You're on my property.

We're with the FBI.

- They're not.
- We were...

We were chasing
what they told us was a monster.

Monster? What did I tell you boys?

There ain't no monster.

I'll show you the monster you're lookin' for.

- Who sent you here?
- Your father.

My father is a simpleton farmer.

He understands nothing
of my scientific achievements.

- What achievements are those?
- What makes you think you'd understand?

Well, I'm a scientist, for one.

Then you probably know that once
in a generation, perhaps once in a lifetime,

a truth is uncovered which thrusts mankind
into a shocking new consciousness,

turning accepted notions
of our very existence on their head.

Consider relativity. The double helix.
And now the homeotic hox gene,

for which I will undoubtedly have my place
among the Columbus's of science

as a visionary leader of men, yes?

What do you want me
to do with these, Dr Polidori?

Never mind.

What is the homeotic hox gene?

She's a scientist. Ask her.

I, uh... I believe that it has something
to do with, um... growth and development.

If you two will excuse me,
I don't have time for this.

I have to travel to the University
of Ingolstadt to deliver an address.

Sir, unless you want
your scientific achievements

to end up as a footnote
on the Jerry Springer Show,

I suggest that you make the time.

Jerry Springer Show?

Witness the morphogenesis of drosophila.

The fruit fly.

What you are watching
has been going on for millennia -

since the Cambrian period
some 580 million short years ago,

when drosophila was first born.

See the elegant symmetry
with which the pupa grows

into a series of beautiful segments.

What we have found...

what I have found

is that these segments
represent a linear model

for the genetic development
of our friend the fly.

Each gene is responsible

for the development
of its corresponding segment -

the legs, the mouth,
the body, posterior and anterior -

but which I, through my genius,
can alter into a creation of my own.

Behold, proboscopedia.

This fly has legs...

Growing out of his mouth.

Why would you do that?

Because I can.

Could that be done in humans?

That would go against
every scientific convention.

But could it be done?

Theoretically.

Good night, Dr Frankenstein.

Despite what you might think, Mulder,

designer mutations like these
are virtually impossible on humans.

- That's not what I just heard.
- Mulder, even if they could,

no scientist would even dare to perform
these kind of experiments on a human.

- Well, then, why do them at all?
- To... unlock the mysteries of genetics.

To understand why,
even though we share the same genes,

we develop arms instead of wings,

we become humans instead of flies,
or monsters.

But given the power, who could resist the
temptation to create life in his own image?

We already have that ability, Mulder.
It's called procreation.

And first thing tomorrow morning,

I'm gonna verify the pregnancy
of Shaineh Berkowitz.

- When are you comin' home again?
- Huh?

- When are you comin' home again?
- What?

- We were gonna have that talk.
- Soon.

- Soon. We'll have our talk soon.
- That's what you always say.

Elizabeth, you know
how I feel about children.

- They're mewling little monsters.
- But I want children.

What happened to our dream?

Of getting out of this place,
getting away from this hick town?

I think that's your dream.

Elizabeth, what do you want?
A baby? Or a Nobel prize?

See you on Thursday.

Hot plates! Hot, hot, hot!

Biscuits, fritters, grits, flapjacks,
eggs - boiled, scrambled, poached and fried.

We got some monster grapefruits
on the way.

Bigger than your head, almost.

I'd... I'd just like some coffee, thanks.

On the house. Compliments of JJ.

That's with two Js.

Is it true Jerry Springer's comin' to town?

We've been had.

I'll save you the trouble of reading it.

It has everything that
we talked about last night. Word for word.

Izzy Berkowitz!

- Get your butt front and center!
- What did I do?

All I can say is, I hope
the answer to that question is nothin'.

We believe you or one of your friends
recorded our conversation last night

- and gave it to a newspaper reporter.
- Me?

In order to promote your
comic-book monster that you created.

- Do you own a tape recorder, Izzy?
- Uh...

Christmas 1993!

..of shared fears. Anxieties
taking the form of a hideous monster

for whom the most horrific human...

- That's for starters!
- ..what we can't possibly imagine...

- Hey. Hey, that's it!

Loneliness

That song was playing
when I got knocked up.

- Is the cloak you wear
- ..cloak you wear

- Who the hell is that?
- That's the voice we heard in the woods.

That's him. The Great Mutato.

- The sun ain't gonna shine any more
- The sun ain't gonna shine any more

- The moon ain‘t gonna rise in the sky
- The moon ain't gonna rise in the sky

- The tears are always clouding your eyes
- Tears are always clouding your eyes

The sun ain't gonna shine any more

When you're without love

- Where are we going now?
- Messenger this to the Bureau.

I want special audio
to separate out the voice.

- Then I wanna see the professor.
- Mulder, this is just a dopey hoax.

Something recorded its voice on this.

What, do you think that Dr Polidori
had something to do with it?

When Victor Frankenstein asks
"Whence did the principle of life proceed?"

and as the gratifying summit to his toils
creates a hideous phantasm of a man,

he prefigures the postmodern Prometheus,
the genetic engineer,

whose power to reanimate
matter, genes, into life, us,

is only as limited as his imagination is.

Mulder, I'm alarmed that you would
reduce this man to a literary stereotype.

A mad scientist.

Who else would go to such trouble
to impregnate Shaineh Berkowitz?

I mean, I have to admit, Mulder,
everything looks in order.

Mrs Berkowitz had a tubal ligation in 1993,

and two months ago she had two
pregnancy tests, both with positive results.

What are you doing?

Mrs Berkowitz said
that when she saw her intruder,

there was a gaseous white cloud.

Then, when she woke up three days later,
nobody knew that she'd been gone.

Yeah. So?

I was born in the wagon of a travelin' show

My mama used to dance
for the money they'd throw

Papa would do whatever he could

Preach a little gospel

Sell a couple bottles of Dr Good

Gypsies, tramps and thieves

We'd hear it from the people of the town

They'd call us gypsies, tramps and thieves

But every night
all the men would come around

And lay their money down

Come on. Get up.

Move!

Mulder?

I told you. There ain't no monster.

What are you doing in my house?

He had this awful face,
with these hideous tumours and...

and not one mouth, but two.

Oh, my God.

Dr Polidori?

Is there something you'd like to tell us?

Are you accusing me of knowing
something that I'm not telling you?

I'm accusing that your wife
may have been impregnated.

Impregnated? By whom?

Oh, I think you...

Sir, with all due respect,
I think this is all part of a hoax.

- A hoax?
- A shameless publicity stunt.

Scully.

What? What is that?

The other victims,
they had their frying pans... violated.

Do you know what that is?

No, I don't.

I think we found our smokin' gun.

Hey, Mom.

Hey, you look great. You look great.

Hey, Gar.

Mom, I got some great news.

- Me too.
- You first.

I quit. I'm clean as a whistle.

Brought you your favourite.
You finish your movie.

Don't stay up too late. OK, son?

- Well, that's a start.
- Well, what about your news?

Well, it's no big deal
I met a girl, We're goin' out.

Oh! Come on, tell us!

- Well, her name is Diana.
- Yeah?

- She's beautiful with long blonde hair.
- Yeah?

She rides horses,
and she's beautiful and she's smart,

and she loves me.

Oh, what's not to love, baby?

Tell me it isn't true.

You didn't.

You wouldn't.

Why?

Because I can.

- Excuse me.
- Not a problem.

Agh.

- What's this?
- Compliments of JJ.

- Coffee?
- Sure.

Whoa!

That's not a place you wanna burn a guy.

- Come on!
- What is it?

Come on! Hurry! Come on!

What's goin' on?

- You wanna see your monster?
- Yeah!

- You really wanna see your monster?
- Yeah!

Here's your monster.

His name... is Izzy Berkowitz!

- Let's get him!
- String him up!

Get your hands off him!

- You let him go.
- I intercepted a package.

How would you like your face
to intercept my fist, coconut-head?

Your kid's a monster!

That is my son you're talkin' about!

What if somebody talked about you
like that?

- Mulder?
- You may have been right, Scully.

What, that they
can be reduced to cultural stereotypes?

- They unmasked the monster.
- Don't start that with me.

I may have found
something saying otherwise.

The residue on the frying pan
was an agricultural product,

used to anaesthetise herds of animals.

- Used by who?
- Farmers,

who must register with the FDA
even to have it in their possession.

- Is there someone registered locally?
- Mm-hm.

Mulder?

We may be too late.

I think we are.

Who's that?

Show yourself!

If you're armed,
drop your weapon and walk out slowly.

Please don't... don't kill me.

- Who are you?
- I'm with the newspaper.

- What's your business here?
- The old man was murdered.

By whom?

- It's alive.
- I've seen it.

In the barn, burying the old man.

He's a killer!

Murderer!

Where's the monster?

Whatever you have in mind, I'm gonna
have to ask you to stop right there.

We have come for the murderer!

- What makes you think he's here?
- I've seen him with my own eyes.

- He is not a man. He is a monster!
- Yeah!

The fiend must be found,
and then we'll let justice take its course!

Yeah!

We'll search every crevice, every ravine!

- Get him alive if you can, but you get him!
- Yeah!

There's only one way Polidori
could have seen that monster.

If he was out here himself.

Mulder.

We're federal agents,
and we're armed! Come on out!

Scully, look at this.

Huh.

- Oh, my God.
- You're gonna have to come out of there.

We're not gonna hurt you.

- Think he understands?
- I hope not.

He looks frightened.

We're gonna have to get him out of here,
Scully. They're gonna kill him.

The barn's on fire!

There it is!

- Let him go!
- Where is he?

You let him go or we'll burn him out.

Where is he? Show the world
your horrid, lumpy face!

Yeah!

- That's him.
- Uck.

That repulsive physiognomy
is the vilest perversion of science.

- Created by whom?
- A pale student of my most hallowed arts,

whose life was taken
by that which he gave life.

By his own horrible creation, by that
monstrosity that you see before you.

Who's he talkin' about?

My father.

- No.
- He can talk.

Your ears deceive you.

It's a trick.

I'm sorry, my voice is damaged
by the gaseous chemical.

But I would like to explain myself.

Despite my appearance, which you see
is quite horrible to the human senses,

I... have never acted to harm another soul.

- These are fiendish lies.
- Quiet.

25 years ago,

my father, having only one son -

a spiteful, hateful man of science,
incapable of the deeper sentiments -

he came to realize that this son
had been conducting secret experiments,

of which I was the most
unfortunate product.

A simple man, he rescued me
and loved me in spite of my deformities.

But as time passed,
I grew restless for friends of my own.

Because I couldn't
go to school or play sports,

or even show my face outside this farm,

my father set out to learn his son's science,

so that before he died
he might create for me a mate.

Uh-oh.

Alas, my father was a simple man,

his heart close to the soil
he worked, the animals he tended.

The experiments he attempted,
too advanced.

The science, too complex
for his understanding.

The results of his experiments,
unsatisfactory.

I still... You mean Izzy...?

But who's the father?

Suffice to say, his experiments failed.

My father is dead.

I am alone and miserable.

But one as deformed and horrible as myself
would not deny herself to me.

If this being you can create,
then I will take blame as a murderer.

I don't know how to recreate you.

You were a mistake.

What we did was wrong.

But in our trespasses,
we gave you a loving son.

And in your homes,

I went places I'd never dreamed of.

With your books and your records and your
home media centers, I learned of the world,

and of a mother's love that I'll never know.

Cher loved that boy so much.

Hey. He's no monster.

Arrest me, then, as you will.

We should go, Mulder.

- The prisoner's in the car.
- This is all wrong, Scully.

This is not how the story's supposed to end.

What do you mean?

Dr Frankenstein pays
for his evil ambitions,

but the monster's supposed
to escape to go search for his bride.

There's not gonna be any bride, Mulder.
Not in this story.

Well, where is the writer?

I wanna speak to the writer.

Put on my blue suede shoes

And I boarded the plane

Touched down in the land of the Delta blues

In the middle of the pouring rain

WC Handy

Won't you look down over me?

Yeah, I got a first-class ticket

But I'm as blue as a girl can be

Then I'm walkin' in Memphis

I was walkin' with
my feet ten feet off of Beale

Walkin' in Memphis

But do I really feel the way I feel?

I saw the ghost of Elvis

On Union Avenue

Followed him up to the gates of Graceland

And watched him walk right through

Now security, they did not see him

They just hovered around his tomb

There's a pretty little thing

Waitin' for the King

Down in the Jungle Room

When I was walkin' in Memphis

I was walkin' with
my feet ten feet off of Beale

Walkin' in Memphis

But do I really feel the way I feel?

Tell me something. Is it...
is it hard to love these babies?

What's not to love?

- Walkin' in Memphis
- Walkin' in Memphis

I was walkin' with
my feet ten feet off of Beale

- Walkin' in Memphis
- Walkin' in Memphis

But do I really feel the way I feel?

Put on my blue suede shoes