All language subtitles for The Big Bang Theory.S11E23 - The Sibling Realignment.720p.HDTV.x264-AVS - mx

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Would you like to inspect the original subtitles? These are the user uploaded subtitles that are being translated: 1 00:00:01,472 --> 00:00:02,763 That's not right. 2 00:00:03,079 --> 00:00:05,373 That's so unreasonable. 3 00:00:05,477 --> 00:00:06,967 Yeah, well, if you're going to be like this, 4 00:00:07,044 --> 00:00:09,148 then I don't want to talk to you right now, either. 5 00:00:09,225 --> 00:00:11,429 Okay. I love you. Bye. 6 00:00:12,408 --> 00:00:14,312 Amazon customer support? 7 00:00:15,986 --> 00:00:17,276 No, my mother. 8 00:00:17,353 --> 00:00:20,374 Guess who she's insisting we invite to our wedding. 9 00:00:20,595 --> 00:00:21,978 Jesus? 10 00:00:22,572 --> 00:00:23,685 If only. 11 00:00:23,762 --> 00:00:25,429 My brother. 12 00:00:25,756 --> 00:00:28,071 Wait a minute. You didn't invite your brother 13 00:00:28,148 --> 00:00:29,446 to your own wedding? 14 00:00:29,523 --> 00:00:31,964 He tormented me my whole childhood. 15 00:00:32,041 --> 00:00:34,292 I don't think I should reward that type of behavior 16 00:00:34,369 --> 00:00:35,795 with a slice of wedding cake in the shape 17 00:00:35,872 --> 00:00:37,654 of the Millennium Falcon. 18 00:00:38,642 --> 00:00:39,674 Try again. 19 00:00:39,752 --> 00:00:42,437 A slice of wedding cake in the shape of a cake. 20 00:00:44,174 --> 00:00:46,459 Look, he may have been mean to you when you were kids, 21 00:00:46,536 --> 00:00:48,295 but you're both grown men now. 22 00:00:48,372 --> 00:00:50,500 That's right. I'm a grown-up, 23 00:00:50,577 --> 00:00:53,351 and if I don't want to invite him to my wedding, then I won't. 24 00:00:53,580 --> 00:00:54,607 Okay. 25 00:00:54,684 --> 00:00:57,265 Except I have to 'cause my mommy's making me. 26 00:00:58,276 --> 00:01:01,667 ♪ Our whole universe was in a hot, dense state ♪ 27 00:01:01,744 --> 00:01:05,503 ♪ Then nearly 14 billion years ago expansion started... Wait! ♪ 28 00:01:05,580 --> 00:01:06,893 ♪ The Earth began to cool ♪ 29 00:01:06,970 --> 00:01:09,532 ♪ The autotrophs began to drool, Neanderthals developed tools ♪ 30 00:01:09,609 --> 00:01:11,787 ♪ We built the Wall ♪ ♪ We built the pyramids ♪ 31 00:01:11,864 --> 00:01:14,714 ♪ Math, Science, History, unraveling the mystery ♪ 32 00:01:14,791 --> 00:01:16,852 ♪ That all started with a big bang ♪ 33 00:01:16,929 --> 00:01:18,748 ♪ Bang!*THE BIG BANG THEORY* Season 11 Episode 23 34 00:01:18,825 --> 00:01:21,030 *THE BIG BANG THEORY* Episode Title: "The Sibling Realignment" 35 00:01:22,868 --> 00:01:25,931 Okay, so each welcome bag gets a schedule of events, 36 00:01:26,008 --> 00:01:27,904 a map, and chocolate from me. 37 00:01:27,981 --> 00:01:30,858 And from Sheldon, a bottle of Purell... 38 00:01:31,911 --> 00:01:34,572 the number for Poison Control in case someone 39 00:01:34,649 --> 00:01:36,569 accidentally drinks the Purell, 40 00:01:37,032 --> 00:01:38,273 and a laminated 41 00:01:38,350 --> 00:01:40,579 table of elements because the American school system 42 00:01:40,616 --> 00:01:42,194 is a failure. 43 00:01:43,361 --> 00:01:45,333 How many out-of-town guests are there gonna be? 44 00:01:45,410 --> 00:01:46,554 I'm actually not sure. 45 00:01:46,631 --> 00:01:48,605 Turns out Sheldon didn't invite his brother. 46 00:01:48,682 --> 00:01:51,522 Mm. Now it's starting to sound like a wedding. 47 00:01:51,882 --> 00:01:54,560 And his mom said she won't come if his brother's not there. 48 00:01:54,637 --> 00:01:57,147 Ooh, now it's starting to sound like a good wedding. 49 00:01:57,985 --> 00:01:59,858 Hey, Bernie. Hey. 50 00:01:59,941 --> 00:02:02,640 How do you know if someone has pink eye? 51 00:02:02,717 --> 00:02:06,220 Um, their eye would be red, swollen and probably oozy. 52 00:02:06,297 --> 00:02:07,944 Okay, thanks. 53 00:02:08,089 --> 00:02:09,850 Both kids have pink eye. 54 00:02:09,981 --> 00:02:11,016 Oh, no. 55 00:02:11,093 --> 00:02:12,500 You stop right there. 56 00:02:12,577 --> 00:02:13,841 I'm getting married in a week; 57 00:02:13,918 --> 00:02:15,547 you are not giving me pink eye. 58 00:02:15,624 --> 00:02:18,944 - I don't have pink eye. - Hey! Hey. Hey. 59 00:02:19,196 --> 00:02:21,033 Step away from the bride. 60 00:02:21,165 --> 00:02:23,617 Okay. I'll go back upstairs. 61 00:02:23,694 --> 00:02:26,044 Get in the shower and then take those clothes and burn them. 62 00:02:26,121 --> 00:02:28,467 Yeah, and all the rest of your clothes! 63 00:02:29,829 --> 00:02:31,670 Ah, worth a shot. 64 00:02:35,289 --> 00:02:37,958 So am I gonna be, like, the only single guy at Sheldon's wedding? 65 00:02:38,035 --> 00:02:39,001 No. 66 00:02:39,082 --> 00:02:40,816 There-There'll be a lot of single people there. 67 00:02:40,893 --> 00:02:42,881 Stuart, Amy's great-aunt... 68 00:02:43,914 --> 00:02:46,652 Although, Stuart's already friended her on Facebook, 69 00:02:46,729 --> 00:02:48,772 so, better move quick. 70 00:02:49,751 --> 00:02:51,051 I got to find a date. 71 00:02:51,128 --> 00:02:52,843 I don't want to be that sad single friend 72 00:02:52,920 --> 00:02:54,232 that everyone looks at with pity. 73 00:02:54,309 --> 00:02:58,092 Uh, I'm-I'm afraid that ship may have sailed. 74 00:02:59,865 --> 00:03:01,056 Leonard, 75 00:03:01,618 --> 00:03:02,810 you have a brother, right? 76 00:03:02,887 --> 00:03:03,906 Yes. 77 00:03:03,983 --> 00:03:05,197 Is he the worst? Is he 78 00:03:05,274 --> 00:03:06,723 an unspeakable abomination? 79 00:03:06,800 --> 00:03:09,459 Does the very thought of him make your skin crawl? 80 00:03:10,539 --> 00:03:11,880 Well, he laughs at his own jokes, 81 00:03:11,957 --> 00:03:13,522 but otherwise he's okay. 82 00:03:13,879 --> 00:03:15,250 Sheldon, what's going on? 83 00:03:15,327 --> 00:03:18,118 I'm trying to invite my stupid brother to my wedding 84 00:03:18,195 --> 00:03:19,611 and he's avoiding my calls. 85 00:03:19,688 --> 00:03:21,600 You don't know he's avoiding your calls. 86 00:03:25,827 --> 00:03:27,310 Hey, you've reached George Cooper. 87 00:03:27,387 --> 00:03:29,825 Please leave a message, unless this is Sheldon again, 88 00:03:29,902 --> 00:03:32,251 in which case, please try me on my other number, 89 00:03:32,328 --> 00:03:34,951 1-800-suck-it. 90 00:03:37,734 --> 00:03:38,852 See? 91 00:03:39,026 --> 00:03:40,662 And I know that's not a real number 92 00:03:40,739 --> 00:03:42,897 because why would it be toll-free? 93 00:03:44,188 --> 00:03:45,392 Sheldon, you tried. 94 00:03:45,469 --> 00:03:46,687 What more could you have done? 95 00:03:46,764 --> 00:03:48,615 Hey, why didn't you invite him in the first place? 96 00:03:48,692 --> 00:03:50,924 You don't know what it was like growing up with him. 97 00:03:51,185 --> 00:03:53,953 I-I get it; I grew up with lots of brothers. 98 00:03:54,030 --> 00:03:55,820 My brother Adoot was especially mean. 99 00:03:55,897 --> 00:03:57,835 Really? I've never heard you mention Adoot. 100 00:03:57,912 --> 00:03:59,302 Yeah, sure I have. 101 00:03:59,379 --> 00:04:01,540 He's the one who left the door open when we were kids, 102 00:04:01,617 --> 00:04:03,592 and my pet mongoose ran away. 103 00:04:04,705 --> 00:04:06,608 Stupid Adoot. 104 00:04:07,900 --> 00:04:10,783 Look, uh, short of getting on a plane and flying there, 105 00:04:10,860 --> 00:04:12,569 what does your mother expect you to do? 106 00:04:16,041 --> 00:04:17,216 I kept saying no. 107 00:04:17,293 --> 00:04:19,365 H-H-How am I here? 108 00:04:21,376 --> 00:04:22,424 Hey, did I tell you? 109 00:04:22,501 --> 00:04:24,017 - I found a date. - To the wedding? 110 00:04:24,094 --> 00:04:25,109 Uh, to coffee. 111 00:04:25,186 --> 00:04:27,951 But if things go well, Sheldon and Amy's wedding. 112 00:04:28,387 --> 00:04:30,224 Aren't you worried it's a little intense 113 00:04:30,301 --> 00:04:32,983 to ask someone you just met to go to a wedding? 114 00:04:33,445 --> 00:04:35,093 I'm running out of time. 115 00:04:35,225 --> 00:04:37,230 Wh-Wh-Why can't there be a service where you can 116 00:04:37,307 --> 00:04:40,272 just pay someone to be your date for the evening? 117 00:04:42,727 --> 00:04:44,218 Like an escort service? 118 00:04:44,295 --> 00:04:46,848 No, no, no. Y-You wouldn't be paying for sex. 119 00:04:46,953 --> 00:04:48,442 I mean, obviously if things went well, 120 00:04:48,519 --> 00:04:51,132 it could lead to sex, but, but the money is for, 121 00:04:51,209 --> 00:04:53,186 like, you know, her time and companionship. 122 00:04:53,263 --> 00:04:57,006 Oh, I get it... an escort service. 123 00:04:57,469 --> 00:04:58,770 Stop saying that. 124 00:04:58,847 --> 00:05:00,451 Stop meaning it. 125 00:05:01,438 --> 00:05:03,591 Hey, Raj, remember when you borrowed 126 00:05:03,668 --> 00:05:05,623 my VR goggles the other day? 127 00:05:05,731 --> 00:05:06,935 Yeah. 128 00:05:07,669 --> 00:05:09,785 Probably shouldn't have done that. 129 00:05:15,825 --> 00:05:18,669 So, wait, y-your brother is Dr. Tire? 130 00:05:18,746 --> 00:05:20,128 Yes, and, apparently, 131 00:05:20,205 --> 00:05:22,488 it only takes half a semester of community college 132 00:05:22,565 --> 00:05:24,772 to get that particular doctorate. 133 00:05:24,880 --> 00:05:27,579 We passed three of these stores on the way here. 134 00:05:27,656 --> 00:05:30,623 Why did you say he's just "some loser who sells tires"? 135 00:05:30,988 --> 00:05:32,682 You're right, that was unfair. 136 00:05:32,759 --> 00:05:35,154 He's a loser who sells more tires 137 00:05:35,231 --> 00:05:37,139 than anyone in Texas. 138 00:05:39,860 --> 00:05:41,132 Oh, excuse me. 139 00:05:41,209 --> 00:05:43,123 Uh, we're looking for a Georgie Cooper. 140 00:05:43,231 --> 00:05:45,834 One second, I'll check to see if the doctor's in. 141 00:05:46,682 --> 00:05:48,860 He is not a doctor. 142 00:05:49,017 --> 00:05:52,451 There's only one doctor here and it's me. 143 00:05:53,213 --> 00:05:54,351 I'm also a doctor. 144 00:05:54,428 --> 00:05:56,256 Do you want to wait in the car? 145 00:05:56,758 --> 00:05:59,069 I wanted to wait in California. 146 00:06:00,689 --> 00:06:02,858 So, is this Georgie? 147 00:06:02,935 --> 00:06:04,188 Yes. 148 00:06:04,501 --> 00:06:06,273 And what is he even using 149 00:06:06,350 --> 00:06:08,444 that stethoscope to listen to? 150 00:06:08,545 --> 00:06:10,638 I don't know, small leak? 151 00:06:11,782 --> 00:06:14,076 All right, that makes sense. 152 00:06:15,543 --> 00:06:18,127 What the hell are you doing here? 153 00:06:18,204 --> 00:06:19,273 Hello, Georgie. 154 00:06:19,350 --> 00:06:20,997 It's just George now. 155 00:06:21,074 --> 00:06:22,649 Fine, George. 156 00:06:22,726 --> 00:06:25,154 No, I don't like it... Georgie. 157 00:06:25,596 --> 00:06:27,325 I see you haven't changed one bit. 158 00:06:27,402 --> 00:06:29,884 Thank you, that is a nice thing to say. 159 00:06:30,776 --> 00:06:31,869 Hey, I'm Leonard. 160 00:06:31,946 --> 00:06:34,498 I'm here for-for no reason. 161 00:06:35,571 --> 00:06:37,132 What do you want, Sheldon? 162 00:06:37,209 --> 00:06:39,060 Why aren't you returning my phone calls? 163 00:06:39,137 --> 00:06:41,093 You're supposed to be the smart one; 164 00:06:41,170 --> 00:06:42,849 you figure it out. 165 00:06:43,242 --> 00:06:44,591 He's not that kind of smart. 166 00:06:44,668 --> 00:06:46,449 You might want to give him a hint. 167 00:06:47,414 --> 00:06:48,553 We haven't talked 168 00:06:48,630 --> 00:06:51,070 in over ten years, and now that you need something, 169 00:06:51,147 --> 00:06:52,871 you think you can just show up at my store? 170 00:06:52,948 --> 00:06:54,224 Well, let's just drop everything 171 00:06:54,301 --> 00:06:55,948 to accommodate Sheldon. 172 00:06:56,107 --> 00:06:57,538 Nice try, 173 00:06:57,615 --> 00:06:59,786 but I am not a gullible little boy anymore. 174 00:06:59,863 --> 00:07:02,068 I can recognize sarcasm. 175 00:07:03,025 --> 00:07:04,280 Okay. You're right. 176 00:07:04,357 --> 00:07:05,539 I'm-I'm-I'm sorry. 177 00:07:05,616 --> 00:07:06,649 Tell me what you need. 178 00:07:06,726 --> 00:07:08,588 Your wish is my command. 179 00:07:08,665 --> 00:07:10,693 That's better, thank you. 180 00:07:17,744 --> 00:07:19,337 Oh, my God. 181 00:07:22,446 --> 00:07:24,185 Yeah, I got it, too. 182 00:07:24,291 --> 00:07:27,326 Wow. You really can't keep your hands off Howard, can you? 183 00:07:27,696 --> 00:07:29,857 I know, I have a problem. 184 00:07:30,518 --> 00:07:33,099 I just wanted to make sure you and Amy didn't get it. 185 00:07:33,189 --> 00:07:35,787 Well, I didn't get it. 186 00:07:36,938 --> 00:07:40,032 You infected me a week before my wedding. 187 00:07:41,500 --> 00:07:43,810 What am I supposed to do about this? 188 00:07:44,321 --> 00:07:46,279 Wear a veil? 189 00:07:48,835 --> 00:07:50,662 It's not funny. 190 00:07:51,723 --> 00:07:53,624 - Look at what you've done to me! - Ah, 191 00:07:53,701 --> 00:07:54,683 hey. 192 00:07:54,760 --> 00:07:57,092 Could you just, like, not touch my computer 193 00:07:58,328 --> 00:08:00,632 or... like, anything else. I just, ugh, 194 00:08:00,709 --> 00:08:03,326 I don't want to look like that in your wedding photos. 195 00:08:05,485 --> 00:08:07,239 There aren't gonna be any wedding photos. 196 00:08:07,316 --> 00:08:08,765 My fiancé's a germophobe. 197 00:08:08,842 --> 00:08:10,136 If he finds out I'm contagious, 198 00:08:10,213 --> 00:08:12,253 he'll never come back from Texas. 199 00:08:12,417 --> 00:08:15,255 What if we tell him the theme of the wedding is Walking Dead 200 00:08:15,332 --> 00:08:17,428 and this is our zombie makeup? 201 00:08:18,479 --> 00:08:19,559 That'll probably work. 202 00:08:19,636 --> 00:08:21,017 We'll call that plan B. 203 00:08:23,092 --> 00:08:24,513 Oh, well... 204 00:08:25,956 --> 00:08:28,517 Turns out this is gonna come in handy after all. 205 00:08:31,804 --> 00:08:33,718 Hold up. I-I'm confused. 206 00:08:33,795 --> 00:08:35,430 You didn't want me at your wedding, 207 00:08:35,507 --> 00:08:37,145 but now that Mom won't come, 208 00:08:37,222 --> 00:08:38,513 you want me there. 209 00:08:38,968 --> 00:08:40,923 I know you don't hear this a lot, 210 00:08:41,000 --> 00:08:42,419 but that is exactly right. 211 00:08:42,496 --> 00:08:43,750 Good job. 212 00:08:45,436 --> 00:08:47,063 Not helping, Sheldon. 213 00:08:47,407 --> 00:08:48,474 Listen here, 214 00:08:48,594 --> 00:08:50,377 you want me at your wedding, 215 00:08:50,454 --> 00:08:52,490 all you got to do is ask nicely. 216 00:08:55,321 --> 00:08:56,896 - Georgie. - George. 217 00:08:59,947 --> 00:09:03,646 I would like you at my wedding. 218 00:09:03,898 --> 00:09:05,476 Thank you, Sheldon. 219 00:09:05,553 --> 00:09:07,312 That is so nice to hear. 220 00:09:08,248 --> 00:09:10,946 But I would rather swallow a pregnant wildcat 221 00:09:11,023 --> 00:09:13,302 and crap out a litter of kittens. 222 00:09:16,196 --> 00:09:18,638 It is fitting that you got into tires, 223 00:09:18,715 --> 00:09:20,873 because you are tiresome. 224 00:09:22,085 --> 00:09:23,841 Sheldon, come on. 225 00:09:24,712 --> 00:09:25,911 Was that too mean? 226 00:09:25,988 --> 00:09:29,185 No, not too mean, not too good either. 227 00:09:32,698 --> 00:09:34,904 No, Mother. That's not fair. 228 00:09:35,302 --> 00:09:36,910 But he told... 229 00:09:37,136 --> 00:09:38,775 Yes, ma'am. 230 00:09:38,875 --> 00:09:40,472 But I said... 231 00:09:40,646 --> 00:09:42,300 Yes, ma'am. 232 00:09:43,048 --> 00:09:44,451 Good-bye. 233 00:09:45,162 --> 00:09:46,520 What'd she say? 234 00:09:46,597 --> 00:09:48,667 She's not getting in the middle of it because 235 00:09:48,744 --> 00:09:51,566 we "boys need to work it out ourselves." 236 00:09:51,823 --> 00:09:53,098 Oh, maybe it's fine if 237 00:09:53,175 --> 00:09:54,683 she doesn't come to the wedding. 238 00:09:54,797 --> 00:09:56,037 I've got Amy now, 239 00:09:56,114 --> 00:09:59,207 and she can do everything a mom can do and more. 240 00:10:00,631 --> 00:10:02,104 Say that to her on the wedding night. 241 00:10:02,181 --> 00:10:03,964 Really spice things up. 242 00:10:04,730 --> 00:10:06,750 This is all Georgie's fault. 243 00:10:06,827 --> 00:10:08,948 My whole childhood, he was mean to me. 244 00:10:09,025 --> 00:10:12,027 Sorry. I know what it's like to live with a bully. 245 00:10:12,732 --> 00:10:14,192 Your brother bullied you? 246 00:10:14,269 --> 00:10:16,886 Oh, I was talking about Penny, but sure, yeah. 247 00:10:17,436 --> 00:10:18,816 Once, when I was eight, 248 00:10:18,893 --> 00:10:20,760 I was going to dress as my favorite scientist 249 00:10:20,837 --> 00:10:23,653 for Halloween, and Georgie threw my costume away. 250 00:10:23,730 --> 00:10:24,800 I had to wear a sheet 251 00:10:24,877 --> 00:10:26,644 and go as a ghost. 252 00:10:26,852 --> 00:10:28,839 Scared myself all night long. 253 00:10:31,240 --> 00:10:33,268 Well, look, we don't fly out until the morning. 254 00:10:33,345 --> 00:10:36,194 Why don't I try and talk to him, give it one more shot? 255 00:10:37,592 --> 00:10:39,107 All right. 256 00:10:40,005 --> 00:10:41,773 But if he says, "Nerd says what, 257 00:10:41,850 --> 00:10:43,229 - don't answer him". - What? 258 00:10:43,306 --> 00:10:45,417 You are a lamb to the slaughter. 259 00:10:48,970 --> 00:10:50,761 So, how was your date? 260 00:10:53,716 --> 00:10:57,058 It was going well until my eye dripped in her latte. 261 00:10:59,370 --> 00:11:01,423 We're so sorry we ruined your date. 262 00:11:01,500 --> 00:11:03,699 Oh, boo-hoo. 263 00:11:04,388 --> 00:11:05,958 His date got ruined. 264 00:11:06,035 --> 00:11:08,980 I'm about to get married, and look at me. 265 00:11:09,974 --> 00:11:11,534 It looks like it's getting better. 266 00:11:11,611 --> 00:11:12,655 Oh, does it? 267 00:11:12,732 --> 00:11:16,207 Does it look like that with your two clear eyes? 268 00:11:17,629 --> 00:11:20,182 I'm sorry. Are you mad that I don't have pink eye? 269 00:11:20,259 --> 00:11:22,378 - What do you think? - Yes! - Yes! 270 00:11:25,365 --> 00:11:26,807 Uh-huh. Okay. 271 00:11:26,884 --> 00:11:29,757 Okay. Uh, uh, listen, I hear you. 272 00:11:29,834 --> 00:11:33,775 I know they're pricey, but these are the Dallas Cowboys 273 00:11:33,852 --> 00:11:35,335 of tires, okay? 274 00:11:35,412 --> 00:11:37,195 And we're talking the Troy Aikman Cowboys, 275 00:11:37,272 --> 00:11:39,771 not that pretty boy Tony Romo. 276 00:11:40,614 --> 00:11:42,460 All right. Good call. 277 00:11:42,594 --> 00:11:43,999 You won't regret it. 278 00:11:44,353 --> 00:11:45,375 Boom! 279 00:11:45,452 --> 00:11:47,446 - Wow. That was impressive. - Yeah. 280 00:11:47,523 --> 00:11:49,951 Well, it's easy when you love your product 281 00:11:50,028 --> 00:11:52,076 and hate Tony Romo. 282 00:11:53,448 --> 00:11:55,030 Yeah, that guy's the... 283 00:11:55,241 --> 00:11:58,022 Actually, I don't, I don't know who that guy is. 284 00:11:58,616 --> 00:12:01,728 If you are here about Sheldon's wedding, don't bother. 285 00:12:01,805 --> 00:12:04,741 Come on. I-I know you two have your differences. 286 00:12:04,818 --> 00:12:06,608 You mean pretty much everything about us? 287 00:12:06,685 --> 00:12:08,202 Well, not everything. 288 00:12:08,279 --> 00:12:11,976 You're both tall, you have the same last name. 289 00:12:12,616 --> 00:12:15,539 Maybe I shouldn't have started this like it was a list. 290 00:12:16,062 --> 00:12:18,514 You have no idea what you are talking about. 291 00:12:18,591 --> 00:12:21,679 Ooh, there... That-that was very Sheldon. 292 00:12:22,798 --> 00:12:26,657 Look, I-I'm sure he was not the easiest brother to have, 293 00:12:26,734 --> 00:12:28,790 but it wasn't easy for him either, 294 00:12:28,867 --> 00:12:30,373 with you picking on him all the time. 295 00:12:32,145 --> 00:12:35,064 Picking on him? Is that what he told you? 296 00:12:35,472 --> 00:12:36,624 Well, what about the time 297 00:12:36,701 --> 00:12:38,836 you threw away his Halloween costume? 298 00:12:39,047 --> 00:12:42,554 Well, yeah, 'cause he was gonna dress as some girl scientist. 299 00:12:45,080 --> 00:12:46,656 Madame Curie? 300 00:12:47,361 --> 00:12:50,046 Oh, I didn't know she was a madam. 301 00:12:51,873 --> 00:12:54,780 Come on. He was still gonna get beat up for wearing that dress. 302 00:12:54,857 --> 00:12:56,556 Well, didn't you sit on his head 303 00:12:56,633 --> 00:12:58,296 while he tried to watch Star Trek? 304 00:12:58,373 --> 00:13:00,968 Well, yeah, but that was hilarious. 305 00:13:02,238 --> 00:13:04,568 That is pretty hilarious, yeah. 306 00:13:05,174 --> 00:13:06,354 Look, I mean, 307 00:13:06,431 --> 00:13:08,155 I always looked out for him at school. 308 00:13:08,232 --> 00:13:09,296 I drove him everywhere. 309 00:13:09,373 --> 00:13:11,670 I apologized to people when he was rude. 310 00:13:11,747 --> 00:13:13,961 Yeah. I've done all that. 311 00:13:14,038 --> 00:13:15,337 I've also removed all 312 00:13:15,414 --> 00:13:17,290 the red balloons from his Lucky Charms 313 00:13:17,367 --> 00:13:19,783 - because they weren't "Irish enough." - All right. 314 00:13:19,860 --> 00:13:21,335 So you know what I'm talking about. 315 00:13:21,412 --> 00:13:23,382 And has he ever thanked you? 316 00:13:23,947 --> 00:13:25,882 Not in so many words, 317 00:13:26,188 --> 00:13:27,929 or any words. 318 00:13:28,170 --> 00:13:30,750 Would it kill him to actually say it? 319 00:13:31,845 --> 00:13:35,265 No. No, it wouldn't kill him. 320 00:13:37,658 --> 00:13:39,092 Leonard, 321 00:13:40,033 --> 00:13:41,593 you know how I got the money 322 00:13:41,670 --> 00:13:44,411 to open up my first store? 323 00:13:45,042 --> 00:13:46,828 I busted my ass for it, 324 00:13:47,069 --> 00:13:49,522 'cause all the extra money that we had had to go to Sheldon 325 00:13:49,599 --> 00:13:51,444 so he could go to college and he could go 326 00:13:51,521 --> 00:13:53,164 study in Germany. 327 00:13:54,052 --> 00:13:56,164 And do you know what he's never said to me? 328 00:13:56,618 --> 00:13:58,546 Danke schon? 329 00:14:00,674 --> 00:14:02,820 It's, uh, "thank you" in German. 330 00:14:03,101 --> 00:14:05,179 Do you need me to sit on your head? 331 00:14:06,533 --> 00:14:07,799 Nope. 332 00:14:07,994 --> 00:14:09,979 After all my sacrifices, 333 00:14:10,604 --> 00:14:13,296 guess which kid my mom is the most proud of. 334 00:14:15,510 --> 00:14:17,100 If it makes you feel any better, 335 00:14:17,177 --> 00:14:19,820 my mom's most proud of Sheldon, too, so... 336 00:14:21,152 --> 00:14:22,309 Leonard, 337 00:14:22,964 --> 00:14:24,482 you want a beer? 338 00:14:24,627 --> 00:14:26,117 Yeah, I would love a beer. 339 00:14:26,679 --> 00:14:27,946 - There you go. - Thanks. 340 00:14:28,023 --> 00:14:29,857 - Can you open it for me? - No, it's a twist-off. 341 00:14:29,934 --> 00:14:31,290 I know. 342 00:14:41,899 --> 00:14:43,125 Hey! 343 00:14:43,202 --> 00:14:45,850 I got all the beads to the other side. 344 00:14:47,333 --> 00:14:49,311 It's not a puzzle, Penny. 345 00:14:50,727 --> 00:14:52,592 Do you really want to be touching that? 346 00:14:52,669 --> 00:14:54,353 Do you know how many sick kids...? 347 00:14:54,430 --> 00:14:56,733 You know, never mind. Knock yourself out. 348 00:14:59,016 --> 00:15:01,076 Bernadette says they're checking the kids now. 349 00:15:01,153 --> 00:15:03,349 You know, maybe we didn't all need to come. 350 00:15:03,507 --> 00:15:06,926 Hey, whatever kind of pink eye their kids have, I have, 351 00:15:07,003 --> 00:15:08,203 and I need to know. 352 00:15:08,280 --> 00:15:10,039 And if it's viral, I'm screwed. 353 00:15:10,116 --> 00:15:13,666 Maybe not. You know, I know it's not traditional wedding attire, 354 00:15:13,743 --> 00:15:16,287 but how about a welder's mask? 355 00:15:16,735 --> 00:15:17,776 If you know 356 00:15:17,853 --> 00:15:20,475 a welder, that could be your "something borrowed." 357 00:15:22,684 --> 00:15:24,349 Great news! It's bacterial! 358 00:15:24,426 --> 00:15:26,064 - Yeah! - Yeah. - Yes! 359 00:15:26,141 --> 00:15:27,335 - Yeah. - Yes. 360 00:15:27,420 --> 00:15:28,896 What are you doing?! Wash your hands! 361 00:15:28,965 --> 00:15:30,779 Oh. Not you. 362 00:15:33,901 --> 00:15:35,410 Hello. Room service? 363 00:15:35,487 --> 00:15:38,600 I'm calling about the club sandwich on your menu. 364 00:15:39,099 --> 00:15:41,125 No, I-I don't want one. 365 00:15:41,202 --> 00:15:43,701 I just want you to spell it correctly. 366 00:15:44,756 --> 00:15:47,928 Unless the "club" is the Poor Typing Club. 367 00:15:48,805 --> 00:15:50,338 Okay. 368 00:15:50,415 --> 00:15:55,353 Now let's discuss this 15% "gratooty"? 369 00:15:56,090 --> 00:15:58,728 Yeah... well, that was rude. 370 00:15:59,239 --> 00:16:01,915 Someone just lost their gratooty. 371 00:16:03,863 --> 00:16:07,001 Sheldon, you need to apologize to your brother. 372 00:16:07,146 --> 00:16:08,524 - I'm sorry? - Yes. 373 00:16:08,601 --> 00:16:11,337 Like that, but nicer, and that way. 374 00:16:12,098 --> 00:16:14,417 I have nothing to apologize for. 375 00:16:14,894 --> 00:16:16,424 I told you this was a bad idea. 376 00:16:16,501 --> 00:16:18,159 Sometimes you can't patch a tire. 377 00:16:18,236 --> 00:16:19,526 You just got to buy a new one. 378 00:16:19,603 --> 00:16:20,970 Actually, that's always the case. 379 00:16:21,050 --> 00:16:23,493 Never patch, buy new. 380 00:16:23,745 --> 00:16:27,029 While I appreciate your folksy tire wisdom, 381 00:16:27,106 --> 00:16:29,723 I don't appreciate what you're putting Mom through. 382 00:16:29,800 --> 00:16:31,692 What would you know about what Mom's been through? 383 00:16:31,769 --> 00:16:32,791 You were never home. 384 00:16:32,868 --> 00:16:34,557 Yeah, this is good. Get it all out. 385 00:16:34,634 --> 00:16:36,157 - Not now! - Shut up! 386 00:16:36,372 --> 00:16:38,653 You went away to college after Dad died. 387 00:16:38,730 --> 00:16:40,490 Who do you think took care of everything? 388 00:16:40,616 --> 00:16:43,868 Mom did. Mom always took care of everything. 389 00:16:44,001 --> 00:16:47,103 Mom was a mess, Missy was a dumb teenager. 390 00:16:47,180 --> 00:16:48,779 I had to look after both of 'em. 391 00:16:48,856 --> 00:16:50,335 I talked to Mom all the time. 392 00:16:50,412 --> 00:16:52,439 If she was upset, she would have told me. 393 00:16:52,538 --> 00:16:54,615 She was protecting you, you idiot, 394 00:16:54,692 --> 00:16:56,967 just like everyone always does. 395 00:16:57,279 --> 00:16:58,734 If things were bad, 396 00:16:58,811 --> 00:16:59,999 then why didn't you tell me? 397 00:17:00,076 --> 00:17:02,557 Because I was protecting you, too. 398 00:17:05,497 --> 00:17:07,498 You're my baby brother, Sheldon. 399 00:17:08,053 --> 00:17:10,404 I know life has been hard for you, 400 00:17:11,633 --> 00:17:14,373 but that don't mean it's been easy for the rest of us. 401 00:17:16,251 --> 00:17:20,246 I suppose I didn't think about how it was for everyone else. 402 00:17:20,450 --> 00:17:22,232 No, that's all right. 403 00:17:22,561 --> 00:17:24,568 I know you didn't. 404 00:17:26,153 --> 00:17:27,727 I'm sorry. 405 00:17:29,797 --> 00:17:31,235 Thank you. 406 00:17:31,512 --> 00:17:34,485 And it would mean a lot to me 407 00:17:34,562 --> 00:17:36,945 to have my big brother at my wedding. 408 00:17:40,679 --> 00:17:42,343 I wouldn't miss it. 409 00:17:48,439 --> 00:17:51,467 Is it me, or did we just patch a tire? 410 00:17:55,180 --> 00:17:58,351 He said, "Never patch." Do you even listen? 411 00:18:06,300 --> 00:18:08,741 Hey, how's it going? 412 00:18:10,314 --> 00:18:11,740 Really good. 413 00:18:11,817 --> 00:18:14,145 Georgie's going to come to the wedding. 414 00:18:14,222 --> 00:18:15,905 Oh, that's great! 415 00:18:16,121 --> 00:18:18,107 Why aren't you looking at the camera? 416 00:18:18,184 --> 00:18:21,171 Oh, you know, I'm just working on my peripheral vision. 417 00:18:22,712 --> 00:18:24,429 Well, that is nonsense. 418 00:18:24,515 --> 00:18:26,858 Your peripheral vision is fine. 419 00:18:26,939 --> 00:18:29,202 Are those women's magazines making you feel bad 420 00:18:29,279 --> 00:18:30,881 about yourself again? 421 00:18:32,367 --> 00:18:35,068 Yup, that is what's happening. 422 00:18:35,788 --> 00:18:39,301 I have told you before, those women are airbrushed 423 00:18:39,378 --> 00:18:41,961 to make it look like they have good vision. 424 00:18:43,260 --> 00:18:45,058 Hey, I-I was thinking, 425 00:18:45,135 --> 00:18:47,078 now that you and your brother made up, 426 00:18:47,175 --> 00:18:49,001 there's no reason to rush home. 427 00:18:49,112 --> 00:18:50,789 Maybe you and Leonard could, 428 00:18:50,866 --> 00:18:53,102 could stay for, uh... 429 00:18:54,150 --> 00:18:57,108 two to three more fun-filled days there. 430 00:18:58,509 --> 00:19:00,274 That's a great idea! 431 00:19:00,351 --> 00:19:02,019 Hey, Leonard, good news. 432 00:19:02,096 --> 00:19:05,906 We do have time to visit the Museum of the American Railroad! 433 00:19:07,627 --> 00:19:10,070 I'd say no, but what's the point? 434 00:19:16,041 --> 00:19:17,863 Ooh. You might not want to get too close. 435 00:19:18,197 --> 00:19:19,839 Pink eye. 436 00:19:20,950 --> 00:19:23,286 Me, too! 437 00:19:24,059 --> 00:19:25,655 - Bacterial? - Yeah. 438 00:19:25,732 --> 00:19:27,302 Same! 439 00:19:28,458 --> 00:19:30,744 I-I know this is gonna sound crazy, but... 440 00:19:30,864 --> 00:19:33,799 would you be interested in going to a wedding with me? 31953

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