All language subtitles for Midsomer murders s12e02

Can I help you, madam?

Yes. Hello.
I'm so sorry to bother you,

but I was just clearing out my loft
when I found this.

I don't know how it got there,
but it's rather nice.

I don't generally look at paintings
found in people's lofts, madam.

There are several house clearance
firms locally,

if you'd like to try there.

Yes, I know. I'm so sorry,
but it is rather nice.

I've got no space on my walls,
but I thought someone might like it.

Er...no.

I'm sorry, this isn't something
I could help you with.

Oh, dear, but it's so pretty.

The frame's rather nice, I suppose.
I could give you something for that.

Shall we say, hmm, £50?

£50? How wonderful!

There's a bird bath
down at the garden centre

that I've had my eye on.
Now I can buy it. Excellent!

A bird bath! How lovely.

I'll just get you some money.

Thank you so much.

Thank you so much.

I'll just pop down to the Causton
Gallery and see what they think.

And if they're not interested,
we've got a deal!

I have to tell you that, sadly,
the gallery you mention

does not have an honest reputation
at all, sadly.

No, I couldn't recommend the place.

Look, how about I give you
£100 for the frame?

Look, how about I give you
£100 for the frame?

Now, how would that be?

One hundred pounds!

Oh. Are you sure?

Oh. Are you sure?

Yes, yes, absolutely.

You could buy two bird baths! Huh?

How generous. Thank you so much.

I don't believe the Causton Gallery
could better that.

The... He's a shark.
He'll trick you!

Surely not.

Look, erm, here's £200. Hm?

Take it.

Come on!

Here's £400.

Look!

I'll give you £1,000.

Mr Prideaux, is there something

about this painting
you're not telling me?

Yes, madam, at £600. £700?

Thank you, sir. Do I hear £800?

£725? No?

All done, then, at £700.

This is a very fine example

This is a very fine example
of a Henry Hogson,

the 18th-century landscape artist
who lived and worked in Midsomer.

the 18th-century landscape artist
who lived and worked in Midsomer.

The scene is of Bishop's Drift,
a local stretch of river.

The scene is of Bishop's Drift,
a local stretch of river.

The figure is almost certainly
Bishop John Fletcher.

The figure is almost certainly
Bishop John Fletcher.

As you can see...he's fly-fishing.

Look, mate,
don't believe what people tell you.

I'm a nice guy. Honest.

Ah, Tilly, come. Tell the man
I'm a reformed character.

Leave me alone, Graham.

Haven't you caused enough trouble?

Just go home.

Clear off!

Oh, dear. Oh, dear. Mr Spate.

Pleasant fellow.

Why is it called Bishop's Drift?

Good question.

Sorry I'm late.
You can see where the Bishop used

to drift his fly downstream,

hence the name still used
for the spot today.

Knows his stuff.
He certainly does.

When did you first realise that the
painting WAS by Hogson, Mr Prideaux?

Well, er...

Well, er...

When he first laid eyes upon it.
Yes.

Yes, it was obvious.

I bet.

I bet.
In fact...

Hogson developed arthritis
in his early 60s

and I have been able to date
this painting to 1792

because of the subtle changes
in his brushwork.

Yes, yes. And that date coincides

with a payment of £50 made
for 'an artistical work'

with a payment of £50 made
for 'an artistical work'

that I found
in Bishop Fletcher's papers,

along with a preparatory sketch
of that painting.

Ladies and Gentlemen -
this is Patricia Blackshaw,

President of the Hogson Society,

who will be bidding on behalf
of the society tonight.

And let us hope she is successful.

Thank you.

Let me assure you that, if we win,

Let me assure you that, if we win,

Bishop's Drift will go on public
display for all to enjoy.

Bishop's Drift will go on public
display for all to enjoy.

Yeah, and how much...
have you raised so far, Patricia?

Oh, I'm sure the Treasurer
of the Society

won't thank me for giving you
that information.

But I can tell you
that Joyce Barnaby and her team

have worked tirelessly
to fill the coffers.

Wahey!

Ah! The moment has arrived.

Ah! The moment has arrived.

Let us take our seats, ladies and
gentleman, in the bidding room.

Richard.

Hello, Matilda.
Hello.

Just wanted to say I'm sorry about
all that unfortunate business.

My hands were tied.
Yes, but by whom, Neville?

Doesn't she run the Simms' Art School
where they do the the art therapy?

Doesn't she run the Simms' Art School
where they do the the art therapy?

Yes. Matilda Simms.

One of her ex-students tried
to muscle his way in here just now.

Graham Spate. One man crime wave.

He was up six-
Shush!

Now, ladies and gentlemen,
shall we settle down?

Excuse me.

My name's Alan Best.

So who's going to get the painting,
then, eh?

Our frozen food man, he seems
very interested? Alan Best.

He's got money to burn.

How much have you got?

120,000.
(AUCTIONEER BANGS GAVEL)

Ladies and gentlemen,
we now come to the main lot,

the oil on canvas, Bishop's Drift,
by Henry Hogson.

It goes without saying,
this is a very rare opportunity

to acquire a work
by a master landscape artist.

Well, let's get going. Who will
start the bidding at £70,000?

Thank you, sir. I have £70,000.
Do I have 80? 80.

Ninety. One hundred.

£100,000 I'm bid.

Thank you, madam. Do I have 110?

Thank you, madam. Do I have 110?

One hundred and ten.

120, madam?

Thank you.

130 to Mr Best.

130 to Mr Best.

He's got it.

140 to the Hogson Society.

We haven't got that kind of money.

One hundred and fifty.

160!
Patricia, we haven't got £160,000.

That's £160,000 to the Hogson
Society. Sshh. Quiet.

Sir?

Hm? I am the treasurer
of the Hogson Society

and er...I am obliged to say

that the Society hasn't the funds
to cover those last two bids.

that the Society hasn't the funds
to cover those last two bids.

I shall continue the bidding
in a private capacity.

What on earth are you talking about?
I have to have it!

Very well.

I have £160,000
to Mrs Patricia Blackshaw.

Sir?

No.

No.

At £160,000...

..going once...

..going once...

going twice.

One hundred and seventy.
(GASPS)

Who's that?

It's George Arlington. He owns
half the Hogsons in the world.

200,000!
Stop this.

We'll end up living in a barn!
220.

You can live in a pigsty.
I don't care! 300,000.

At the back?

Sir? Are we all done?

£400,000.
(GASPS)

That's enough!

Selling at £400,000... Any more?

Just give him the painting!

At £400,000 for the last time...

..sold!

I don't believe it.

That smashes the record.

Felicity!

Congratulations.
I simply can't believe it!

Felicity, what are you going
to do with the money?

Felicity, what are you going
to do with the money?

You...money grubbing degenerate.

Damn you!
Patricia, please!

The gentleman asked
what I plan to do with my windfall,

and I will tell you.

I will take £2,000
for a short holiday.

The balance I will donate
to the Arnold Simms School of Art,

which is run
by my dear friend Matilda Simms.

As many of you know,

the Simms school does vital work
with delinquents and mentally ill,

but has recently lost its funding
from the Midsomer Council.

I have had a good life.

And my gift will allow Matilda
to continue with her important work,

And my gift will allow Matilda
to continue with her important work,

and I ask you all, please,
to support her.

Mr Arlington!

May I take this opportunity
to congratulate you?

My name is -
I know who you are.

Oh.

Oh.
Come to my hotel tomorrow. Ten.

We have some business to discuss.

Yes, of course, Mr Arlington.
I'll be there, not a minute late.

Well, better luck next time.

There won't be a next time.

George Arlington has pushed
the price

of Hogson's work through the roof.

At least Matilda will put the money
to good use. Does she need it, love?

I mean, I thought her daddy
left her a fortune?

Oh, that's all gone.

The last few years she's been
reliant on a grant from the council.

And with that gone,
she was in trouble.

Would I be right in thinking
it was Patricia Blackshaw's husband,

as chairman of the Arts Committee,
who removed her grant?

Yes.

But it's just so lovely that
it's finally worked out for Matilda.

Dear old Felicity,
what a wonderful present.

Nice work.

Daddy would be proud of you.

I think so.

Sleep tight.
Oh, I will.

(PHONE RINGS)

Genius.

Hello?

Hello?

Hello?

(PHONE RINGS)

Hello? Felicity Law.

'Felicity, The Black Book.'

It's missing.
Someone's got into the safe.

No!

'Shall we call the police?'
We can't.

You're in terrible danger.

'You must be very careful.'

I understand. Don't worry.

'I'll be fine.'

She died about eight hours ago.

And, Tom, signs of torture.
Hm?

I think someone held her hand
on the hotplate?

(DOOR OPENS)

No sign of a forced entry, sir.

I wouldn't be surprised
if she was the type

that left the back door open.

Or else she knew her killer.

(CAR TYRES SCREECH OUTSIDE)

Please let me through.

Let me through. What's happened?

I'm sorry. You can't come in.
This is a crime scene.

Miss Simms, I'm sorry to have to tell
you that Felicity Law is dead.

Miss Simms, I'm sorry to have to tell
you that Felicity Law is dead.

Oh, no! How?

We're looking at a murder
investigation here.

Miss Simms, I'm Detective Chief
Inspector Barnaby.

I'm in charge of this investigation.

Now, listen,
could you tell me, please,

when did you last speak
to Felicity Law?

Last night. I called her.

What time was that?
About 11:30.

W-Why did you call?

To thank her.

She sold a painting and she gave
the money to the school.

Oh, God!

Oh, God!

Who'd have done such a thing?

(SHOP DOORBELL RINGS)

Three, four, five...

Mr Barnaby!

Mrs Blackshaw.

I'm here in my official capacity,
I'm afraid.

I have to tell you that erm...

Felicity Law is dead.

She's been murdered.

Murdered?

I was at the auction yesterday and
you were very upset, weren't you?

You were very angry.

Yes, well, of course I was.

We'd all worked very hard
to raise that money.

Where did you go after the auction?

Home.

I may not have liked Felicity
and her degenerate friends,

but I would never wish - I'm sorry,
what do you mean by degenerate?

You must be aware of the rumours?

No, I'm not aware of the rumours.

Ah.

Back in the '70s,
there was a great deal of er...

liberty up at the art school.

Arnold Simms,
Matilda Simms's father, was known

to work on several canvasses
simultaneously.

Felicity Law was one of them.

And your point is what?

Merely that beneath that sweet
little old lady demeanour,

Felicity Law was erm...

Clearly she thought nothing of
carrying on with a married man.

That was 40 years ago.

I'm sure Matilda Simms remembers it
like yesterday.

Believe me,
this is not what it seems.

All that show about giving the money
to Matilda's school?

Do people really do things like that
out of the kindness of their heart?

Hm?

Miss Simms!

Erm...this is Detective Sergeant
Jones. Thank you for seeing us.

Not at all. Come in.

Thank you.

Oh, this is very splendid.

When did your father purchase
this place? '63.

It was virtually abandoned.

This is my father's work.

It's...it's...it's er...
very beautiful.

Who's the model?

One of my father's pupils.

It's very...intimate.

She was his lover at the time.

Oh, right

Nice rods.

Split cane.

They belonged to my father.
I'll show you round.

Excuse me!

Thank you.

This is our workshop.

Come to the office later on.

Ha! So, what inspired your father
to set up this therapeutic school?

Ha! So, what inspired your father
to set up this therapeutic school?

Arnold thought that life was cruel,
short and painful.

Criminal behaviour is often
a manifestation of mental illness,

a fear of life,
a withdrawal from pain.

My father's message was simple.

Make pain your teacher,
not your master,

and then you can become yourself.

The school has
a very high success rate.

Was er...Graham Spate a success?

Graham was one of only
a small number of students

who got nothing
from their time here.

How many students have you got here?

It varies. Around thirty, usually.

They live here?
Some of them.

A few come straight
from the streets.

A few come straight
from the streets.

The work they do helps them
sort out their problems.

Yeah.

Can I help you with anything else,
Mr Barnaby?

Erm...yes.

Could you tell me about Felicity Law?

She knew your father, didn't she?

Yes.

How well did she know your father?

Very well.

She was his lover.

She was in a menage
with my father and my mother.

How did your mother feel about that?

It's hard to explain.

It's hard to explain.

My father was
such a generous character.

The normal rules
didn't seem to apply.

He had so much love in him,
there was plenty to go around.

Yes, I can imagine that.

Yes, I can imagine that.

She does have
the most wonderful body...

doesn't she, Mr Jones?

What do you think, Mr Barnaby?

I think she's lovely, Miss Simms.

Isn't she?

I understand there's been
a lot of local opposition

to the work you do here
. Is that right?

Yes.

It all came to a head
over the Graham Spate episode

Oh, Graham Spate.

Caused a lot of trouble, that boy.

Graham came to the school
after being released from prison.

He showed great promise
as a painter,

but it was all too much for him.

He reverted to criminality.

He was the excuse the Arts Committee
were looking for

to cut off funding.

So the sale of Bishop's Drift comes
at a very opportune moment, then?

You could say that.

We were scraping along before,

but Felicity's gift
pulled us out of trouble.

Her death came as a terrible blow.

(FOOTSTEPS)

(DOOR SLAMS)

What's wrong?

Alan, don't do anything stupid.
Sshh. Be quiet.

(CAR DRIVES AWAY)

I want them caught.

Why, yes, we'll, er...
we'll do our best, sir.

You do that.

You got an alarm system?

Well, of course. I've got sensors
on the windows and on the doors.

They must've found some way
of bypassing it.

How did they manage to do that?
I don't know.

You're the detective, you tell me!
Oh, sir.

Sorry.

It's just all been a bit
of a terrible shock, actually.

The painting was here.

The painting was here.

Hm. I was at the auction
the other day. Well, so were you.

So you'll know that another Hogson
went for £400,000.

How much do you think
your painting would fetch?

I think in today's market it must
have been worth £500,000.

Maybe more.
Five hun -? Ooph.

What was it insured for?

200,000.
Ooph!

I was going to speak to my insurers
this week about upping the premium.

Mr Best?

Yep?

Your neighbours report
hearing gun shots last night.

Was it the thieves
who fired those shots?

No.

Who fired the shots?

Things are bad enough as they are.

Look, you have to understand about
Hogson. When you get into him,

he changes your life.

I loved that painting.

So, the price of Hogson's work
goes through the roof,

and Alan Best
has his painting stolen.

Coincidence?

Coincidence?
Hm...

Here's something for you.

I saw Graham Spate being thrown out

of the auction rooms
the day of the sale.

Now you're talking. Yeah.
I'd like you to pay him a visit.

Yes, sir.

And I...am going to do some research.

If we're going to get anywhere with
this case, I have to know my Hogson.

Yeah.

Bit of research.

Huh. Two centuries have passed,

and, look, it's pretty much the same,
isn't it?

This is where he placed his easel.

And this field here
is still used to raise pigs.

Different kind of pigs, but otherwise
it's just the same. It's remarkable.

That's why local people
love Hogson so much.

He ties the past to the present.

Well, it's a chocolate box.

Ah, now, that's where you're wrong.

Lush it may be.

Fecund.

But there's a social realism there,
too.

Take another look.

The man on the horse
is the land owner

surveying his magnificent estate.

He commissioned Hogson
to paint Midsomer Meadow

as a wedding gift for his wife.
But look here.

as a wedding gift for his wife.
But look here.

Children playing? Sweet.

Take another look.

They're not playing.

They're digging up roots to eat,
because they're starving.

You see?

They collected them in a basket.

They collected them in a basket.

Well, I have to say, I wouldn't have
seen that, not at first glance.

Never underestimate Hogson.

His work's full of it.

Look.

Look.

This picture's called
The Parson Preaching.

It hangs in the National Collection.

But notice
where his gaze is falling?

On the old woman's purse.

Exactly.

Silver tongued Parson James
retired in some style

after being left a fortune
by his parishioners.

It's nice work, if you can get it.

There's a lot to his stuff,
isn't there?

His oeuvre, Mr Barnaby, his oeuvre.

His oeuvre, Miss Simms.

Mr Arlington, isn't it?

George Arlington.
How do you do, sir?

I'm Detective Chief Inspector Barnaby
from Causton CID.

Now, don't you worry, sir. I'm just
here for a little art appreciation.

Congratulations on your purchase,
Mr Arlington.

Thank you, ma'am.

This is Matilda Simms.
She runs the local art school.

Yes, I know about your work.

So this is Bishop's Drift?

This is the spot
where he set up his easel.

River's changed course a little,

but otherwise that's about it.

Your father was a keen fisherman,
wasn't he?

He was, yes.

I heard what happened
to Felicity Law.

Is there any news
in the investigation?

Well, it's early days yet, sir, but,
as they say, we're working on it.

Hello, Graham.

Can I come in?

So you've been behaving yourself,
then, have you?

Absolutely.
I'm a reformed character.

And you don't know anything about
the theft of Alan Best's Hogson?

Alan who?

Did you do all these?

Yeah.

I don't know much about art,
but I reckon you've got talent.

You're right...

you don't know much about art.

Well, Matilda Simms thinks
you could have gone a long way

if you'd carried on.

What does she know?

She's just a spoilt
little daddy's girl.

Oh, I think she's quite interesting.

Got her hooks into you as well,
has she?

Ahh.

Is that why you stopped painting?

No.

So why did you stop?

Crime's more...

creative.

Well, I'm sorry you think that,
Graham.

I thought you'd turned
a bit of a corner with art.

It sort of shines a light
into the dark areas, doesn't it?

You never know what you're going
to find, do you?

I suggest you stick to plodding,
mate.

Because you'd make a useless shrink.

Mm. It is a nice picture.

I like it.

You can imagine er...Wordsworth

or Houseman coming over the brow
of that hill, can't you? Hm?

Yeah. You see, that's the secret
to understanding Hogson.

He was an early Romantic.

He was a contemporary

He was a contemporary
of George Crabbe, you know.

And very lush, he may be,
very fecund,

but with just a touch
of social realism.

Yeah, yeah, very...

fecund.

It's amazing what you pick up
in an afternoon with Matilda Simms.

You met up with her?
Yeah, I told you. Research.

I spoke to Graham Spate
about Matilda Simms.

He got very defensive.

I got the impression
they'd been close.

That's interesting.
Isn't it?

He's done the pigs really well.

My uncle had pigs.
Did he?

Yeah. They're Tamworths, I think.

Yeah. Good pig, the Tamworth.
Easy to rear and a nice eater.

Yeah. Good pig, the Tamworth.
Easy to rear and a nice eater.

Mmm! Quite the porcine expert,
aren't we, Jones, eh?

Do you know anything
about Anthony Prideaux?

He's got a gallery
in the high street.

Stephens, you check up to see
if he's got form? Yes, sir.

One, two, three, four, five, six.

Hello, again!

Good morning.

Good morning, to you.

How's business?
Brisk.

How's business?
Brisk.

The auction has stirred the waters.

Yes. We've sold several prints
of Bishop's Drift already.

Have you?

Oh! When I think of the pleasure
the local people would have got

out of seeing Bishop's Drift
on public display here,

it breaks my heart.

Still, life's full of tragedy.

Yes, indeed...

like the death of Felicity Law.

Though I shared little
with her in this life,

I abhor the manner of her passing.

If I remember rightly,
at the auction you mentioned a um...

a preparatory sketch
that Hogson made for Bishop's Drift?

Do you still have that?
Of course.

Come with me.

How did you come by this sketch?
Ah-ha!

I had a tip-off...

that Bishop Fletcher's descendents

had dumped his papers into a skip
outside their house.

I took the whole lot home and
I spent a summer going through them

and I found this among them.

The thought that out there there
might be an undiscovered Hogson?

I couldn't sleep a wink for a week!

Now, that was in 1979,

Now, that was in 1979,

and I've been searching
for Bishop's Drift ever since.

And there it was, all the time,
in Felicity Law's attic?

If only she'd have come to me first,

instead of that snake,
Anthony Prideaux.

(SHOP DOORBELL RINGS)

Excuse me.
Yes.

Can I help you?

WOMAN: (AMERICAN ACCENT)
Hi. Thank you.

Yes.

Oh, dear.

Well, I think I'm too late.

I was on my way over for the auction
when all hell broke loose.

And I got held up in New York and
missed the sale of Bishop's Drift.

I was hoping
to acquire a Hogson locally.

I thought this might be the place

to find out if other works were
coming to market?

Ideally, something, you know, big.

I wouldn't know, I'm afraid.

Oh. Sure.

Tell me, is it true Bishop's Drift
went for a song?

If you consider £400,000 a song,
then, yes, it did.

If you consider £400,000 a song,
then, yes, it did.

Perhaps you'd like to go and
see the exhibition in the gallery?

Oh, great!

Thanks!

Hello!

Hi.

I'm sorry I couldn't help
but overhear.

You're looking for a Hogson,
are you?

Yes.

I was on my way over
for the auction,

when all hell broke loose
on the markets.

But I'm here now.

I just had to see Hogson country.

Well, er...welcome.

Thank you.

Are you a Hogson buff?

Oh, I er...you know, I dabble.

Well, if you know of anyone
that wants to sell,

my name's Christine Miller and I'm
staying at the Golden Hind Hotel.

Well, I will certainly keep my ear
to the ground for you.

It was a pleasure to meet you Mr...?

I'm Detective Chief Inspector Barnaby
from Causton CID.

Well, like I said,
it was a pleasure to meet you.

Likewise.
Goodbye.

Goodbye.

And er...have a nice day.

Who's that?

That, Jones is Christine Miller,
newly arrived from New York.

Or so she says.

The car's owned by an insurance
company based in London...

..which specialises in fine art.

So she's not a fund manager
from New York;

she's an art insurer from Fulham.

And what is she up to?

So.

So...what?

You were snooping around Alan Best's
house taking photographs.

Why?

My company insured Alan Best's
painting, Midsomer Meadow.

Obviously we're not keen
to pay out the 200,000.

If you're trying to get the painting
back by offering thieves money,

may I point out to you

that paying for stolen property
is a criminal offence?

We call it a finders fee.

Do you, really?

It's no defence
if you're holed up in court.

We're exploring all options.

It's possible that Best is
in financial difficulties

and he arranged for the painting
to be stolen for the insurance.

Hm.

Now, look...a Hogson was recently
sold for a record fee - £400,000.

Now, look...a Hogson was recently
sold for a record fee - £400,000.

Why wouldn't he just put his painting
up for sale?

A gallery or auction house
could ask up to 40%.

40%!
Selling is risky.

What if nobody wanted the painting?

Miss Miller, you do know, don't you,

that the owner of a Hogson
has recently been murdered?

that the owner of a Hogson
has recently been murdered?

And we think whoever stole
Midsomer Meadow was involved.

You're dealing with killers here.

I know all about that,
but I have a job to do.

Miss Miller,
I'm prepared to offer you a deal.

Excuse me.
Ah, Mr Barnaby.

How can I help?

How can I help?

Could you let me have
everything you've got

on fly-fishing and pigs, please?

Fly-fishing and pigs.

Fly-fishing and pigs.

You can't take those.
They're reference books.

I'll bring them back!

Jones.

I have a result.

This, Jones...

this is a painting
of Midsomer Meadow.

Now, you correctly identified
the breed of pig in the painting

Now, you correctly identified
the breed of pig in the painting

as being Tamworths.

Now, these got their name
from the founding father

of the British police force,
Sir Robert Peel of Tamworth,

who brought some pigs over
from Ireland in 1809.

But the breed didn't fully establish
itself in England until 1865.

But the breed didn't fully establish
itself in England until 1865.

Hogson died in 1810,

Hogson died in 1810,

which means, does it not,
that the painting predates the pigs?

which means, does it not,
that the painting predates the pigs?

Which means...
BOTH: It's a forgery.

Exactly.

And if Alan Best did arrange
to have his Hogson stolen,

we now know the reason why.

He knew the thing was worthless.

(PHONE RINGS)

Morning, Stephens.
Oh, morning, Sir.

Susan.

Thanks for calling.

Christine Miller's just had
a phone call

from a man with a Hogson for sale.

She's meeting him in half an hour.

Did he say who he was?

Said his name's Toby Smith and that
he had got a Hogson for sale at,

quote 'a reduced rate'.

(KNOCK ON DOOR)

Keep him talking. Jones, come on.

(KNOCK ON DOOR)

(KNOCK ON DOOR)

Come in, Mr Smith. As you know,
I'm in the market for a Hogson.

You say you have one for sale?

First perhaps, we might establish
your credentials as a buyer.

(MOBILE PHONE RINGS)

(TURNS OFF PHONE)

Sorry.

The Keystone Cops, I presume.

Mr Prideaux.

Right, Jones, take a look around.

See if you can find any more
iffy Hogsons.

You'll need a search warrant.
Show me your warrant.

If you're going to carry on
like that, sir,

I'll take you down
to the station right now

and charge you
with receiving stolen goods.

Thank you. Carry on, Jones.
Sir.

So which Hogson were you planning

to sell Christine Miller, then,
Mr Prideaux?

I think there's been
a misunderstanding here.

It was merely erm
an exploratory meeting.

I was merely suggesting that if
she was in the market for a Hogson,

I could introduce her to someone,

who might, perhaps,
have a Hogson for sale.

It would help you and it would
certainly help me,

if you were to answer
my questions truthfully.

I am answering
your questions truthfully.

Because, as you know,
Felicity Law was murdered.

And this is a very serious matter.

So, own up or we have ways
and means...etcetera, etcetera.

Well, you've chosen the wrong man
this time, Barnaby,

because I am made of sterner stuff.

I know, Mr Prideaux.

What do you know?

I know that Midsomer Meadow...
is a forgery.

I know that Midsomer Meadow...
is a forgery.

No. Now, that is where you're wrong.
Completely wrong.

Might I suggest you leave art
to the experts

and concentrate instead on matters
within your intellectual grasp? Hm?

What makes you think Midsomer Meadow
is a forgery?

Graham Spate told us.

That name is unfamiliar to me.

He says it was your idea to steal
Midsomer Meadow from Alan Best.

I never knew it was stolen.

I know nothing about this Spate
or his crimes.

I'm a professional,
with an impeccable reputation.

And two previous convictions
for receiving stolen goods.

Where's the painting now?

Under his bed!

Graham?!

Graham Spate?!

He's in here!
Yep.

I'll organise a full search of the
house, sir.

OK.

Repeated blows to the skull with a
blunt instrument

and not so long ago. The body's
still warm to the touch.

And more signs of torture again?
Very nasty. Any ideas?

No. Except whoever did it must have
known that painting was a forgery

otherwise they would have taken it
with them, wouldn't they?

Mm.

Good news, Mr Best.

Good news, Mr Best.

Yeah?
Yes.

We've got it back! I don't believe
it!

Excellent.

Aren't you pleased?
I'm thrilled.

You don't look it.

What is that on it?

That's blood.
Blood?!

There's been an incident.

I'll get a Jay cloth.

Now, Mr Best, you must upgrade your

Now, Mr Best, you must upgrade your
alarm system.

I will. I'll talk to the insurers
about it next week.

Thank you so much.

Er, Mr Best, do you know a
Graham Spate at all?

The name's familiar. He's a local
tea leaf, isn't he?

That's the man. You ever spoken to
him?

No.

Cos Graham Spate has just been found
murdered, Mr Best.

And according to his phone records,

he spoke to you several times on the
night Midsomer Meadow was stolen.

Well, I get a lot of crank calls.
Yeah, I'm sure you do.

Curious thing, isn't it,

about the Tamworth pigs in your
painting there?

They weren't introduced into this
country

until years after old man Hogson had
died.

until years after old man Hogson had
died.

But I think you know that, don't
you?

But I think you know that, don't
you?

I bought this painting in good
faith.

Look, Mr Best, I think you should
tell me everything that happened.

Somehow, Spate discovered that
Midsomer Meadow was a fake.

And he was going to reveal it to the
world unless I paid him 50,000 quid.

He knew about the pigs

and some of the other errors the
forger had made.

Other errors?

Other errors?
Yeah.

Can you point them out to me?

The four swineherd. Look closely.

Yes?

They're The Beatles!

Oh, yes! George, Paul, John and
Ringo!

I knew he wasn't going to be happy
with 50,000 quid,

so I offered him a better deal.

If he stole the painting and
destroyed it,

he could have £100,000 of the
insurance money.

So what did he do - get greedy,

try to sell the painting on instead
of destroying it?

Yeah.

You do understand, Mr Best, that you
are now a suspect in this case?

When was he killed?
He was killed sometime this morning.

When was he killed?
He was killed sometime this morning.

Well, that's me in the clear, then,

because I've been in church all
morning with Yvonne.

We've been rehearsing our wedding.

Mr Best?

I heard the news. I'm really pleased
for you.

Where did you find it?

Oh that's a long story. But there it
is.

Mr Best, don't you think we should
up your premiums?

No, I don't think so.
Oh. Why not?

Cos this is junk!

Cos this is junk!

I found these.

What do you make of that?

What do you make of that?

Aww.

Wish she was my art teacher!

Forensics have found prints all over
the shop.

Have they?

He was murdered?

Oh, God.

Matilda, er, Miss Simms, if I were
to take your fingerprints,

would they match those we found all
over Graham Spate's cottage?

Yes.

Yes.

What were you doing there?
I still have a key.

I went there last night. It was
awful.

Why didn't you call us, Miss Simms?
I was looking for these pictures.

Well, by the look of it, you were
very keen on Mr Spate.

I was in love with him.

Beneath all the anger and violence,
there was something very tender.

Would it be fair to say that, er, he
hurt you

and he damaged the reputation of
your school?

Do you see where I'm going with
this?

Are you suggesting that I...

No! I didn't kill Graham.

I couldn't kill anyone.

OK.

What is a woman like that doing with
a prat like Graham Spate, eh?

I mean, come on!

Must know his way around the ladies,
sir.

Thank you, Jones.
Where are we going?

Felicity Law's cottage.

What do you notice about this
cottage, Jones?

I think you're about to tell me,
sir.

Yes, I am.

Felicity Law told Prideaux she found
her painting in her loft.

But there ain't no loft.

It's just an expression though,
isn't it? It's not evidence.

Oh, all right.

Now, Jones, you're the fisherman.

Look at the loop shape the Bishop
has made with his line there.

Yeah, it's a Spey cast.

Yeah, it's a Spey cast.
Yes, it is. And...?

Well, you're the expert now.

Well, I can tell you, Jones, as a
result of my research,

that that kind of casting - the Spey
cast -

that that kind of casting - the Spey
cast -

wasn't used or known about until
1850.

That's 40 years after old man Hogson
was dead. So...

Bishop's Driftis a forgery too?

Yes, and I think Felicity Law knew
that.

And I think she knew the identity of
the forger too.

Patricia Blackshaw?

No, I've seen Patricia Blackshaw's
paintings at the Hogson shop

and she's truly awful.

But whoever painted this is good.
Very good indeed.

We're looking at a sophisticated
proper artist here,

not a talentless amateur.

So, intimate local knowledge,
profound appreciation of Hogson

and a superb technique. Now, who
could that be?

Tell you what it is - painting is
hard.

Yeah.

Hello again.

You forged Bishop's Drift, didn't
you?

Matilda, the life drawing class is
waiting for you.

Tell them to start without me.

Come with me.

Where are we going?
To my father's studio.

My father forged Midsomer Meadow and
Bishop's Drift in this room.

He developed a deep respect for
Hogson.

He saw him as a fellow radical,

an artist struggling against
materialism.

Why turn to forgery?

It was an accident.

It was an accident.

He was particularly in awe of
Hogson's brushwork

and in order to understand it
better,

he made a copy of
The Parson Preaching.

A gallery owner from London happened
to see it,

mistook it for the original and he
offered my father £20,000.

So, you're telling us that he
couldn't resist the temptation?

But your father was a famous artist.
He had a considerable reputation

and he was earning lots of money.

His paintings sell for silly money
now but back then, we were broke.

He was desperate to keep the school
open,

so from time to time...

..he'd paint a new Hogson.

But what about the mistakes he put
in, like the Tamworth pigs

and the Spey casting - what was all
that about?

I think at first, he wanted to be
found out.

But when the so-called experts began
to lap them up,

But when the so-called experts began
to lap them up,

it became a game for him.

Yes, but on the other hand,

Yes, but on the other hand,

he was at great pains to cover up
his tracks, wasn't he?

I mean, the preparatory sketch for
Bishop's Drift -

did he deliberately put that into
the Bishop's papers?

Yes, so that when the work appeared
at a later date,

no-one questioned it.

My father left me several forgeries,
knowing I'd need the money.

Whenever we ran out, I'd sell a
painting.

And that's what happened

when Midsomer County Council cut off
your grant, is it?

Yes.

Felicity and I decided to sell the
final forgery in my possession -

Bishop's Drift. We'd pulled off the
same scam several times.

Until Mr Graham Spate discovered
your little secret.

How did he do that?

My father made a record of all the
errors

in a notebook - the Black Book.

What was that?

The Black Book. It was a sort of
insurance policy.

I kept it in my safe.

I kept it in my safe.

But on the night of the auction, it
was stolen.

By Spate?

He knew where I kept the key to the
safe.

Spate could have contacted
George Arlington

and told him he'd paid £400,000 for
a forgery.

Arlington could have murdered
Felicity in revenge.

And if there are forgeries in
Arlington's collection,

he could lose millions.

So, Spate was killed for the Black
Book and not the painting.

Whoever's got The Black Book now has
great power

Whoever's got The Black Book now has
great power

but could also get themselves
killed.

Mr Arlington, could we have a word,
please?

Mr Arlington, did you kill
Felicity Law?

That dog don't hunt. Why in heaven's
name would I do that?

That dog don't hunt. Why in heaven's
name would I do that?

Because you were angry, sir,

because she'd sold you a fake
painting.

Fake? What the hell are you talking
about?

Half your collection of Hogson
paintings are forgeries.

Did you know that?

My entire collection has been
examined

by the top art historians in the
world.

You really should check your facts
before making wild allegations.

May I see your book...please?

Thank you.

The Salmon Fly by George Kelson,
published in 1895.

I see you've taken the trouble to
find out

about the technique of Spey casting,
sir -

developed in Wales and Scotland
long, long after Mr Hogson was dead.

Unless I'm under arrest, I intend
to leave.

Good day, gentlemen.

The Black Book.

See, you know about the Black Book,
don't you?

That book has already killed two
people.

I think you better go home, sir,
before it kills you, too.

(MOBILE RINGS)

Arlington.

Mr Arlington, it's Anthony Prideaux
here.

What do you want?

What do you want?
You know what I want.

You have until midday tomorrow,
George, or I will ruin you.

Good day.

Ah. Paul, Ringo, John, George.

The cause of death seems pretty
obvious, don't you think?

Yes, indeed.

Yes, indeed.

No sign of a weapon, Tom.

Sir?

Sir?

The last call Prideaux made was to
George Arlington.

Now, there's a surprise (!)

Ah, and here he is.

Mr Arlington.

Mr Arlington.

Not a pleasant sight, is it?

I had nothing to do with this, I
swear to you.

I've been in the pub all afternoon.

Come on then, please.

You haven't been entirely honest
with me, have you?

Now, look, you can see what the
situation is.

Now, will you please tell me what
was going on

between you and Mr Prideaux?

He was blackmailing me.
He was blackmailing you?

That's right.

He had the Black Book.

He had the Black Book.

He'd identified every forgery in my
collection.

The forger had made a small error
in each painting.

You're an expert and you didn't
notice that?

We see what we want to see, don't
we?

Was he trying to sell you the Black
Book?

He wanted £1m.

Were you gonna pay it?
What choice do I have?

A great deal of my wealth is tied up
in my Hogson collection.

When was the exchange to take place?
Tomorrow.

You people sure know how to ruin a
vacation!

Oh, I do apologise, sir (!)

I'm heading home.
No, no, sir.

Again, I'm sorry, but you can't do
that.

And why not?

And why not?

Because whoever did that to Mr
Prideaux

almost certainly has got the Black
Book.

And it won't take them long to work
out that you're the best

because you're the richest blackmail
target.

Now, listen.

When they contact you, you get in
touch with me immediately.

I want you to say that you'll pay
them the money.

Arlington's alibi checks out - he
was at the pub.

Downed half a dozen whiskies,
apparently.

Yes, I bet.

Yes, I bet.

Forensics have got some interesting
fibres but don't hold your breath.

So...Graham Spate steals the Black
Book from Matilda's safe.

He realises Midsomer Meadow is a
fake,

so his first port of call is
Alan Best.

He steals the painting and offers it
to Prideaux.

Look, you go through Prideaux's
phone records.

See if he's made contact with any
other Hogson owners.

He might well have been blackmailing
other people, too, mightn't he?

And whoever killed him must know
about the Black Book.

Mr Arlington.
Thank you, ma'am.

'Collect £2m in used £50 notes.

Place the money in a shopping
trolley

and place a plastic bag of groceries
on top to hide the money.

Leave the trolley beside desk three

of the reading room in Causton
Library at exactly 11am tomorrow.

You'll find the Black Book on the
desk.

Take it, go home to America and
never come back here again.'

Can you raise that kind of money in
the time?

Two million is a lot.

What's happening?

An old lady sitting near desk three.

Whoa. He's on the move.

He's got the money. He's leaving the
bank.

He's got the money. He's leaving the
bank.

Roger that.

It's all quiet here. No...

Wait a minute. The book's there!

He's taken the book and he's left
the money.

Well done, you. Thank you.

What's happening?
Nothing.

I can still see the trolley by the
table.

Roger that. Come on, George. Come
on.

Tuck yourself in there.

The blackmailer's picked up the
money.

It's Neville Blackshaw.

He's heading your way.

Neville. Neville Blackshaw.

Mr Barnaby! How are you?

I'm very well. And you are under
arrest. Take your hands off that.

What...

Where's my money?
It's in there, sir.

What are you doing? That's my
shopping!

It's gone. My money's gone.

Mr Blackshaw, where is the money?

What money? I don't know what
you're talking about.

I just went into the library to pick

I just went into the library to pick
up some shopping.

What - did you forget it?

Or did someone ask you to go in
there and collect it for them?

Patricia rang half an hour ago.

She said she'd got home,

realised she'd left the shopping in
the library next to desk three.

Well, I work just round the corner,
so I popped out to pick it up.

Patricia Blackshaw must have
switched the trolleys.

How could you let her do that?

(CHURCH BELL)

Oh, no!
What?

She was in there.
Who?

The old woman at desk three.

You must be Mrs Blackshaw.
Yes.

My name's Melanie. I'm here to show
you aboard. May I take your bags?

No, thank you. That won't be
necessary.

No, thank you. That won't be
necessary.

Erm...what are you going to do with
your car?

Nothing.

Right.

The flight plan has been cleared for
your trip to Florence.

Here it is.

A little radio transponder in the
bag with the money.

Failed to spot it when your husband
walked out with his basket

but once you were on the move, we
could track you.

Patricia Blackshaw, let me put it
to you

you killed Felicity Law,
Graham Spate and Anthony Prideaux,

didn't you?
That's a ridiculous suggestion.

No, it's not.

How did the Black Book come into
your possession?

I don't know what you're talking
about!

All I'm prepared to say is that my
actions were entirely honourable.

I merely sought to expose little
Matilda Simms

for the criminal that she is and rid
the world of fake Hogsons,

thus ensuring his reputation for
posterity.

Now, if that is a crime, I'm guilty
as charged.

Ensuring his reputation for
posterity.

That is just not true, is it?

Your actions were driven entirely by
greed

and by a passionate hatred of
Arnold Simms.

and by a passionate hatred of
Arnold Simms.

You were his pupil and you were also
his lover.

It is you, isn't it? You in the
painting hanging in the hall?

This is the last painting. I've sold
all the rest.

You loved him but he rejected you.

Tell me about that.

That's no business of yours!

You did love him, didn't you?

It's all too long ago.

He was your teacher, you admired
him.

I did admire him, yes.

He was older but so brilliant, so
alive.

He was older but so brilliant, so
alive.

Yes, we became lovers.

I was so happy.

I wanted to paint, live a bohemian
life of adventure and daring.

Oh, I loved him so much.

But he rejected you. How could he do
that?

He said it was, er... because I had

He said it was, er... because I had
a bourgeois mind.

And Felicity Law took your place.

Mm-hm. That was the final
humiliation.

Despite my perfect beauty, he
preferred her!

And Felicity Law got a life of art,
laughter, sexual adventure.

And all I got was jam, Jerusalem and
bloody Neville Blackshaw!

Patricia, when did you first realise
that someone was forging Hogsons?

Oh, Felicity told me.

After the auction, I went round to
her cottage

to make my feelings plain...and...

..things got a little out of hand.

You greedy old witch!

You should have sold it to me!

Please Patricia, no more, I beg
you.

I was doing you a favour! It was a
forgery!

I'd long suspected there were
forgeries floating around.

Well, paintings kept popping up.

And it occurred to me that if I
could get Felicity to tell me

who the forger was, I could, well, I
could blackmail him or her.

You tortured her, didn't you?

No, no, no, no, argh!

She was so tough. She wouldn't tell
me a thing.

(SCREAMS)

So, you killed her.

What choice did I have?

The painting - Midsomer Meadow -
that was stolen from Alan Best -

did you suspect a connection then?

Well, it was very coincidental.

Why did you suspect Graham Spate?

Felicity told me enough for that.

He knew his art.

He could have been the forger.

So, I took him a bottle of wine.

And while he was looking for a
corkscrew, I hit him over the head.

By the time he came round, I'd got
him well tied up.

Argh!

Are you the forger?

No!

Then how do you know it's a forgery?

The Black Book. It lists all the
forgeries her father ever made.

Please, no more!

Where is it?

I don't know!

Argh!

Anthony Prideaux's got it! We're
working together.

Please!

I suspect that you've got no qualms
about killing Graham Spate.

Nope.

He was such an unpleasant young man.

But then all you had to do was find
the Black Book.

Paul, Ringo, John, George.

And write a little note to
Arlington.

Cos you knew he'd do anything in the
world to protect his collection

and his reputation.

Precisely.

I nearly got away with it, you know.

Well, Mrs Blackshaw, I hope when
you're in prison,

that will be of some comfort to you.

£2m, all there.

If you could just sign this receipt
for me please, sir.

Sure.

What are you gonna do with it?
You've missed the banks.

My hotel has a good safe.

You want one of my men to escort
you?

No. That's very kind of you. I'll
be fine.

You could call me a taxi.

Jones.

Sir.

Where's Arlington?
He left for the hotel, sir.

That's not the book. He switched it
at the library.

Cab company says he's not going to
the hotel.

He's heading for the art school.

And Matilda Simms is the only one
who can prove

that half his collection are
forgeries.

The students will have gone for the
weekend.

She's on her own. Come on.

Who is it?

Come on, come on. Answer.

(PHONE RINGS)

Matilda!

Try the studios.
Sir.

Matilda!

Miss Simms?

Miss Simms?

(RIPPING SOUND)

It's OK, sheriff. Miss Simms and I
are doing a little business.

You tricked me, sir. You stole the
Black Book.

Miss Simms and I have reached an
agreement.

Have you?

I will remove the remaining
forgeries in my collection

and destroy them.

and destroy them.

In return, she will destroy the
remaining forgeries her father left,

thus bringing an end...

..to this unhappy chapter.

You told me that Bishop's Drift was
the last one.

Did I?
Yes.

Sir, if you go on doing that, you'll
lose yourself millions.

Since the auction, the value of my

Since the auction, the value of my
collection has doubled.

And once the art world discovers

that half of my collection has been
lost,

well, I anticipate the value of my

well, I anticipate the value of my
collection may well double again.

You've got your murderer, Tom. Can't
we just leave it at that?

No! What about Patricia Blackshaw?

I mean, do you think she'll keep
quiet about all this?

She knows everything.

What about the other forgeries in
other people's collections?

Who would believe the rantings of a
deranged murderer

against the opinion of every art
critic in the country?

How about we all go downstairs and
have a drink?

Well, that's a very nice suggestion
but we're still on duty

and I've got a mountain of paperwork
to do.

I've got to be going too. I've a
flight to catch.

Would you be so kind as to take me
to my hotel, Barnaby?

Oh yes! Certainly. Glad to be of
service (!)

Oh yes! Certainly. Glad to be of
service (!)

Thank you, Tom.

Oh there's nothing to thank me for.

I shall be running a new course next
term on Henry Hogson.

Since you've acquired such an
interest, why don't you sign up?

You know, there's nothing in the
world I'd like better than that...

..but I can't.

Why not?

I mustn't. But I know someone who'd
enjoy that course very much.

Oh, good.

Thank you.

Oh Tom, what a lovely present! A
course on Hogson.

How thoughtful of you.

How thoughtful of you.
I knew you'd like it.

I shall look forward to it. That
Matilda Simms is so interesting.

Yes, she is.

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