All language subtitles for the_sensuous_detective_xxx

Get the ass off of me.

Easy.

Come on.

Come on, lick.

Suck on it.

Suck. Come on, get it.

Get in your fucking mouth and suck.

Can't you take any more of that?

Honey, get out of here.

Gotta stop drinking.

notice her and she's here. Kelly, I'll
just be a minute.

You told me you weren't married.

I lied.

Oh, I would have never was a married
man.

You're lucky to get anything new,
sweetheart. Come on. Anything. At this

come on.

In a minute.

Okay, okay, okay, okay.

Mate.

Morning, Kelly.

I didn't realize I had the chain on the
door.

You live like a pig, you die like a

rat. You know that, Mac?

You've got to stop sleeping here.

I know, but what can I do?

I mean, five years I've been in that
apartment, and this must be the 20th

she locked me out.

Just for being a little late with the
rent.

I mean, she's a bitch.

You think after five years that... I'm
only four months late anyway. What's

months? After five years, I should be
able to... Maybe you should start using

this instead of here.

You might think clearer.

You mean... You mean throw a little poop
on steak once in a while?

You should be a fucking detective.

I am a fucking detective. I mean
detective.

Not a bad idea.

She might even let me back in my
apartment.

Well something better happen. We haven't
had a job in months.

Maybe my prices are too high

We made an awful lot of noise.

Phillip must have been.

Detective Agency, please hold.

Thank you for holding.

No, he's on a long distance call from
the Bahamas.

Would you care to hold or should I take
a message?

Thank you.

Mr. Philip Morris.

Yes, thank you for holding.

I'll transfer you now.

Take the McGamro papers over to
Johnson's office and tell them I don't

see them again until they're filled out
properly.

And get Chief of Police Watterson on the
phone. Just get it done the way I want

it.

Hello, McDonald here. Make a brief. I'm
busy.

Oh, Mr. Morris. What a pleasant
surprise.

Oh, of course.

I'll check with my lame -brained
secretary to see if she has any idea

I'm free or not.

You want to see me?

Good deal.

Yes, yes, I'm free this morning.

Around noon?

Fine.

I'll see you then.

Bye -bye.

Oh, what did you do that for?

Lame -brained. Oh, lame -brained. Oh!

Oh.

No, it's on the floor. But did it hurt?

Come on. What? Come on. Show me where it
hurts.

I'll make you feel better. No.

Come on. No.

Come on.

You will? Give me that.

It'll make you feel better.

Come into the den.

I want you to help me with something.
It's very important.

Now, sir?

Yes, now. What do you want me to do?

RSVP you?

Rufus?

What the hell were you doing down there
anyway?

Looking for termites, sir.

Termites?

Oh.

Philip, you're spying on me again.

You're wet.

Water will do that sometimes.

I called that detective you recommended.

Good. When's he coming over?

He said in about an hour.

Are you sure, absolutely sure, he's the
finest detective in town?

That's what I was told.

Why?

No reason, really.

But he...

He seemed a bit unusual.

I mean, he just... Philip, you're being
paranoid again.

And why do you want to detect it anyway?

Oh, for a friend of mine. Well, who's in
trouble.

What friend?

Oh, you don't know him.

I'm making a mess.

What if you clean up?

We gotta get over to, what's his name,
Josh?

What's his name?

I'm Shane Morris.

Clean the fucking place up, would ya?

Does it feel better now, baby?

Don't remind me.

You sounded as if you were a very busy
man when I was speaking to you on the

phone.

He's a gorgeous male specimen.

What? Your boss, Mac.

He's, uh, very handsome.

Hmm. Yes. Yes, he is.

How should I put this more tactfully?

Is he, uh, a good buck?

A good buck.

Oh, no thanks. I just had one.

I think we should finish our discussion
in private.

Okay.

Excuse us, ladies.

We have some business to discuss.

Man talk. If it's one thing that
disgusts me more, it's man talk.

Well, I'm sure we're quite capable of
entertaining ourselves, Philip.

Aren't we, Kelly?

Two weeks from Monday to 10.

Put on that.

I'm having my legal counsel over for a
formal reading to the changes of my

Oh, no, not for me.

No, I'm feeling a bit lightheaded.

Oh, just a little more won't hurt.

Something to sniff?

It's a wonderful feeling.

I'm an infomaniac, you know.

Really? No, I didn't.

You know, when I was a little girl, I
had claustrophobia.

But I grew out of it.

Claustrophobia? That's a man's disease.

They're like small, damp places.

The smaller and damper, the better.

You're absolutely right.

A beautiful woman like you shouldn't be
wasted on a phobia.

But I like men.

I always have.

So do I.

Unless something better comes along.

Mrs. Morris.

Marcy. Oh, was that so bad?

Well, no, but I really shouldn't.

Are you afraid someone will walk in on
you and catch you doing something so

terrible?

considered making some very drastic
changes as to how much and to whom I'm

to leave my fortune.

Do you think I'm strange?

No. Should I?

Well, some would.

I guess it's when you're married to
someone as rich and old as Philip, you

afford to indulge in your fantasies.

Do you have any fantasies, Kelly?

Yeah.

Might one of them be me?

Well, yes.

We like it.

You see, Mac, as of this moment, not
even my attorney know of the chain.

In the last few days, I have been
receiving some letters and

pictures and the like.

Dear Daddy, coming to visit you the 8th
and 9th.

Joni. P .S. Daddy.

Watch out for Walter.

He's been saying terrible things about
you.

oh my goodness

My oldest daughter, Joni, she teaches
physical education in a high school in

Walnut Creek. She's got a job to prove
her independence.

Well, I know she hates me.

Here is Carol.

I have stipulated in my will that each
child gets $5 ,000 a month.

Hmm.

What worries me, Mac, is that they
should suddenly become wary of each

I mean, that doesn't surprise me.

God knows they're a neurotic
triumvirate.

But for all of them to show up for the
weekend

together... You'd like to avoid an
incestual bloodbath?

Oh, hey, at least on the premises.

My position is firm, Mac.

This is not an ordinary assignment.

My houseboy, Rufus, has a check made out
to you for $2 ,000 in your name.

If I'm alive on Tuesday morning, there's
a bonus of $25 ,000 for

you. Well, you can go to the bank with
that, Mr. Morris.

No.

I can live with that.

You can go to the bank with it.

When it's my turn to hit, I never miss.

All three of your children will be taken
care of properly.

Good. My life depends on it.

So, uh, what did you and Mrs. Morris
have to talk about?

Oh, this and that.

Marcy's a very fascinating woman.

Oh, Marcy, huh?

What do you mean by fascinating?

Well, you know, provocative, many
-faceted.

Sexy? You said it.

Kelly,

wait. This guy could be a real loony.

I mean, his father says... So you do
worry about me.

No, hey, not really.

Let me tell you something.

I just don't want to feel guilty, you
know, in case something does happen to

and I have to keep all the money myself.

Bama. I love you. I should have known.

I thought you did, too.

I just left Kelly off at Grant and
Wilcox in North Beach.

She'll learn all she can about Walter
Morris.

I'm a little disturbed, though.

It's her first solo assignment, and I
always consider detective work a little

like sexual intercourse. It's more fun
when you have someone to help you.

We're here.

Hi. I'll give you a blowjob if you can
take me up the intersection of 580.

You sure you won't bite?

Come on, are you kidding?

I won't bite.

No biting.

Not very far.

I'll hold it. So will I.

Okay.

I'll say thanks a lot. I really
appreciate this. What?

I said I really appreciate this. It's
hotter than... It's hotter than... I'm

phonia.

to find out what I can about Joan and
Carol, one during the day and the other

night.

This could present a problem, since they
live 50 miles apart.

Joanie jogs every day at Cherry Park.

I join her tomorrow without causing any
suspicion, but I won't try to show her

up since she's a member of the
Williamson's.

Oh, chauvinist.

Calm down and keep studying.

And Carol is a loner, doesn't like to
socialize. They brought her.

Probably a virgin.

Oh, yeah.

Well, that feels good.

Bastard.

Don't come in my mouth, okay?

I don't like that.

Well, I'm not going to come all over the
scene for Christ's sake. I've got to

drive this car all the way to Walnut
Creek.

I'll catch it, but I don't... Walnut
Creek?

Nice town. My sister and her family live
there.

What about parties?

I love parties.

You could stop by my place.

Good idea.

think of like you know hemingway and
faulkner and sinclair lewis and like the

whole lost generation like uh they're
really lost man heavy heavy i can

tell you're into the whole scene is
there anything else oh wow

all right

Oh. Oh.

Oh.

Oh.

Hi, honey.

Hi, how are you?

Who the fuck is this?

My old man.

Who, your old man? What is he, a faggot
who wants to fuck me in the ass? What's

going on?

He wants to watch. He wants? He wants to
watch.

Mr. What? Well, I'd like to watch, too.
Why don't you suck his dick?

How about it? Huh?

Is he a comedian?

Huh? He is a comedian.

Yeah, he is.

There's a smile. What is this shit?

Nice to watch, huh?

Yeah. He spoke.

I don't believe it. He spoke.

He spoke.

He's trying now.

He just fucked?

Watch it, get a blowjob, and say two
words a week.

What's your

name?

Oh, his name is O.

What's your name? Who was that again?

Tonya, right?

Nice to meet you.

Hey, I don't have to wait for you.

Is either guy not a faggot?

Answer my question.

He's not a faggot. Can't you tell?

I don't know.

Come on, tell me. What

is it? What is it?

I'm done!

Then I told him, I said, you see more
water, man, when the tide's in.

You see more land when the water's off
the sand.

Trippy. Yeah.

It was too heavy. I mean, the dude
started flipping out and acting crazy.

I'm looking for a friend of mine, Walter
Morris.

You know him?

Yeah.

Weird guy, your friend, lady.

Hangs around.

Strange. Hey, beware the duck that flies
in the Campbell's soup, huh? You know

what I mean?

Yeah, gotcha.

Do you know where he lives?

Hey, yeah, up on Temple Street
somewhere. I don't know exactly.

Whoa.

No.

Kurt. You're lucky I almost gave you too
much.

Who are you?

Oh, Mike.

That's beautiful, bitch. Real cute.

You come sneaking into this apartment,
my apartment, and you ask me who I am?

Look, I thought... I was looking for
George.

George Henderson.

Don't lie to me, cuz.

I know a hell of a lot more than you
might think.

My father sent you.

You're supposed to kill me.

What? You're crazy. Shut up!

That's very clever.

A lady assassin.

The last thing poor Walter might expect.

I don't... I don't know what you're
talking about.

You're driving me, bitch.

As soon as you realize I'm not fucking
around, the better it's going to be for

both of us. Do you understand that?

Now, how much is he paying you?

Paying me for what?

If you don't mind, I prefer to run
alone.

Not any competitive jogging, huh? I'm
into all forms of competition, buddy.

I'm not running a hundred -yard dash.
I'm exercising.

Which, by the way, it looks like you
could use plenty of. Oh, yeah?

Yeah. You fat -ass button pushers come
out here once every six months and think

you're class -A athletes.

Most of you just about drop dead after
half a lap.

You don't know how to warm up, and you
don't know how to run, either.

Is that a fact?

It's a professional opinion.

Jogging is more like physical
meditation.

But in your case, labor pain.

You're just not even competing because
I'm a man. Is that a fact?

You jerk. What did I tell you anyway?

If you'd have croaked, had a heart
attack or something, I would have just

you lying there. You know that?

I hurt my arm.

Well, you just rest there a while.

I'll fix you something cold to drink.

Good. That'd be great.

My special brew.

It's ground raw liver with chicken heart
in soybean milk.

Are you for real?

You know, you're not that bad looking.

You weren't such a typical male nitwit.
And a physical slut.

I'm a good fuck, though.

No kidding.

For how long? Twelve seconds?

I like long -distance runners.

No hundred -yard dashes.

How about a full Walter?

Here you go.

I wanted to meet you.

I've never even seen you before.

I'm a peeping Tom.

You are not.

Why did you want to meet me?

Well... You asked too many questions.

No, rest first.

What?

I wouldn't know where to dump your body
if you... You are a terrific lover.

Hmm.

Oh. Oh.

Too bad you won't get a chance to report
back to him.

And pretty soon, there ain't gonna be no
more heirs for my daddy's fortune.

You understand what I'm trying to say?

What do you mean, no heirs?

Take my word for it.

What do you want?

Joe sent me.

I'm just kidding. A joke. A joke. I'm
here to see Carol.

Carol? Who are you?

Mickey's fling. Oh, yeah?

I've heard of you.

Come on in.

Thanks.

Get an extra foot.

Take off your clothes.

What?

You're not my type.

I'm an encyclopedia salesman.

Oh.

Aww.

Lock him together.

You're not... No, you're not. You know
what, Carol?

Hmm.

Carol. Carol Morris.

Who are you?

Hey, I don't need you no more, pal. Hey,
man. Hello. You got a good head.

That's good. Go play with one of the
other girls.

Carol Morris. Who are you?

I'm the plumber.

Plumber? Yes.

Oh, my God.

you

Come on, that wasn't a fire. That was a
prank. He's making a joke. Come on,

let's have some fun.

What the fuck is this? It's exactly like
somebody said fire.

Fire,

huh? Get down.

Named what?

Encyclopedias. What the hell is an
encyclopedia? Pool toy.

Gee, I got one of those.

Everyone should.

You look kind of tired.

I feel a little tired.

Oh, really?

I'll tell you.

Same thing, day in, day out.

Trying to bust the old massage parlors.

Trying to close down the porno houses.

Oh.

You guys are lucky that you're in my
territory, you know.

These other cops, they're kind of closed
down to town practice.

I don't know about that, Frank. I think
you've been asking for a little bit too

much lately.

Well, the way I look at it, you know, I
treat you guys fairly, and, you know,

you guys treat me nice.

Oh.

Listen,

it could be the chief.

Oh, Frank. I got a job. I don't want to
lose my job.

Hello? Oh, Frank, it's Mac.

Mac?

Look, Mac, I'm busy right now.

Could you call me back later?

Hey, Dick Tracy, I need your help. It's
important.

Yeah, but I'm involved now. You know,
I've got some important things to take

care of.

I'll call you back later.

Remember the Mettler case, Frank? You
still owe me one.

It's Kelly.

Kelly?

I think she's with a guy named Walter
Morris, and I think she's in some real

trouble. I've got to find her fast.

Look, if I help you out this one time,
then we're going to be even.

All right.

Look, call me back later. Where?

Here.

Goodbye, Mac.

All right.

What was that all about?

Ah, shit.

Come on, Stan. It's important.

I owe this guy one favor. He helped me
out before.

Oh, no.

I've got to go down to the station. I've
got to.

Oh. Stay right here. This is a party,
Poop. Stay here. I'm going to take care

it. I'm coming back.

God, he just leaves us here.

Oh, I know.

Uh -huh.

See, you guys started without me.

I got a little catching up to do.

I'm afraid I'm going to need you a lot.

Why don't you join in?

I'm going to finish. I can keep the
clothes off. I'm coming right in. Oh.

Hurry. I have had a hard day, and

I deserve a good time.

Set away.

I'm going to do my best.

Well, I should think that after two
hours.

I want to go right back in the middle of
you.

You're

blowing

that ear.

Oh, damn.

Girls, I'm sorry.

This is the last phone call I'm going to
answer. I swear to God.

God, you're kidding.

Hello?

Yeah, Mac, I thought it was going to be
you.

Listen, it's the apartment building over
on Chestnut.

226.

And if you don't find him there, try the
Wild Side Coffee House. It's over on

Temple Street.

Boy, am I glad to see you.

You okay?

Yeah. Did you catch him?

Hell no.

Who was he anyway? Batman? I felt like I
was chasing a monkey.

I don't know who he was, but he shot
Walter.

Where is he?

He crawled off, and I didn't want to
yell or anything.

Oh, that feels good.

I thought we should talk first. I'm
scared to get involved.

Why?

I don't know. I'm just being cautious.

It's happening too much.

We're into bad trouble.

What about my car?

We can get it later. Right now, I've got
to see some people named Morris.

I'd rather pass.

Well, you have a chance to right now.

I want you to use your feline powers to
get Frankie to do us one more favor.

What can Frankie do that we can't?
Arrest people.

Like who?

Like Mr. Morris and his houseboy, Rufus,
who's been following us since we

started this thing.

Yeah, I didn't recognize him at first
because of that beard, but I got a close

look. I could tell.

I didn't even know there was a Rupert.
It's because you're a lousy detective.

When you were in screwing Mrs. Morris,
you should have been doing your job.

Well, you don't fuck around, do you?

I haven't stopped working since I
started on this thing.

Morris' own house boy.

Then Morris had his own kids killed.

And since you obviously can't kill
someone and then collect insurance on

we... He's been framed.

He should be a fucking detective.

Very clever.

How does Frank fit in?

Simple. I'll go on ahead and get the
ball rolling.

Now, I'm going to try to get Morris to
admit what he's done to me, which may

seem harmless enough. And by the time
you and Frank get there, we'll be ready

put the handcuffs on him. And even if
not, we'll be off the hook.

Which is the most important thing right
now.

But how are you going to make him
confess?

Well, I haven't figured that out yet,
but if Rufus is as stupid as I think he

is,

there just might be a way.

And what if Frank won't come?

He will.

You just tell him that he'll have a
collar big enough to earn him a big

promotion and a big commendation. If
that doesn't work, tell him to suck him

off.

Tell him you'll go to bed with him.

And if that doesn't work, I'll tell him
you'll go to bed with him.

Who's there?

Oh, shit. You guys aren't going to
believe this.

You're not getting up now, buddy. I've
got you pinned. You understand.

You understand. I just got to answer
that door. I got to.

What?

You're kidding.

I'm sorry. I got to.

You got to understand.

Oh, shit, man.

Just a second. I'll be right back.

For Christ's sake, who's there?

Frank, it's Kelly. Let me in.

Oh, Kelly.

Kelly, I have company.

Frank, this is important.

Kelly, I'm square with Mac. Yeah, but
not with me.

Look, Kelly, I'm busy. You can see.

Yeah, well, I'll wait and watch.

Well, don't you want to join us?

company can second lady oh is she gonna
join us good friend of mine

Thanks, but really, she should be going.

Oh, that was good.

Okay, Kelly, I'll be right there, ready
to go.

Oh, you really are a party pooper. Be
good and don't break the law.

The next time you have a friend over,
make sure she can join.

Yeah. Really.

Stick him with him.

Good morning.

Yes?

McDonald's, isn't it?

Yeah.

Is Mr. Morris expecting you?

No, but I think he'll see me.

I think you did it.

I beg your pardon, sir?

Aren't you some sort of butler or
something?

Yes, sir.

Well, isn't the butler always the one?

I'm not sure I know what you mean, sir.

Ah, never mind. Thanks anyway.

I appreciate the help, Rufus.

I think I'll keep all the money myself.

I didn't expect to see you for another
week or so. Come on, let's sit down. I

know I'm here a little early, but the
job's done, so I thought I'd come by and

get paid.

What do you mean the job's finished?

Look, it's the 11th until next week.

I know what day it is.

You were only concerned with safety from
your sibling monsters.

So?

So you don't have to worry about them no
more.

What are you saying, Lack?

Oh, come on.

You didn't offer me nearly $30 ,000 to
babysit.

I... I offered you that money to ensure
my safety, which I did.

May I ask how?

Don't be stupid. I did your dirty work.
Now give me my money.

I think he's trying to tell you that he
killed your children.

I swear, Mac, if this is true, I'll see
that you get the goddamn chair.

Well, you'll be right there with me,
sweetheart, because all I did was your

bidding.

Come on, Morris.

Pay me $25 ,000. All right, I'll pay,
but I'll tell you you'll never catch me.

I'll see if they fry your goddamn ass
first.

Calm down. $25 ,000.

Hey, what are you giving them all that
money for? Shut up, you idiot.

For killing Johnny, Carol, and Walter.

What do you think?

But $25 ,000.

That's right.

But... You see, Rufus...

Twenty -five grand for a couple days'
work. That's not bad.

How much do you make?

Come on, get it up.

You'll pay dearly for this.

Philip will see to it that you and your
secretary both hang.

In the meantime, take your money and get
out of our house.

Now!

Thank you, I'll take that.

But that's my money.

Shut up, you moron!

But I killed the children. It's my
money. What are you saying, you idiot?

told me to.

It's mine.