All language subtitles for BadAssDownloader - 720p HD_She Takes The Huge 13 Inch Dildo The Meat Tube Named Long John - EPORNER

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Would you like to inspect the original subtitles? These are the user uploaded subtitles that are being translated: 1 00:00:00,000 --> 00:00:04,019 Mm -mm, time for some Monday schlong madness. 2 00:00:05,280 --> 00:00:09,880 Finally taking an afternoon to fuck this toy I got from Hanky's Toys. 3 00:00:13,500 --> 00:00:16,600 The meat tube, the sausage man. 4 00:00:17,020 --> 00:00:21,480 I think it's actually called the Long John if I'm getting the model correct, 5 00:00:21,780 --> 00:00:22,780 modeling correct. 6 00:00:23,060 --> 00:00:28,440 I think this is the Long John from Hanky's Toys. Comes in one size. 7 00:00:31,110 --> 00:00:37,170 big Yeah It's just like a big fucking meat tube 8 00:00:37,170 --> 00:00:44,070 Cock situation it's like There's the 9 00:00:44,070 --> 00:00:49,850 The size up for you This 10 00:00:49,850 --> 00:00:55,690 is what we're working with today 11 00:00:55,690 --> 00:01:02,500 I'm not even sure how long the insertable length is on this from like 12 00:01:02,500 --> 00:01:03,500 balls to the tip. 13 00:01:03,820 --> 00:01:08,720 We're gonna have to pull up the measuring tape to take some measurements 14 00:01:08,720 --> 00:01:09,720 do you think? 15 00:01:10,720 --> 00:01:14,480 Yeah, it has this kind of weird curve, like you can see that. 16 00:01:15,540 --> 00:01:20,280 So I'm not sure which way I should ride it. I'll probably try both just to see 17 00:01:20,280 --> 00:01:21,820 which way is more stable. 18 00:01:22,980 --> 00:01:25,860 And we're gonna see how much of this I'm able to take. 19 00:01:26,800 --> 00:01:27,800 I don't know. 20 00:01:28,320 --> 00:01:31,080 I don't know if I'm able to help this to the balls. We'll have to measure it and 21 00:01:31,080 --> 00:01:32,280 see if the numbers add up. 22 00:01:33,100 --> 00:01:35,760 It's not particularly thick, so maybe. 23 00:01:36,460 --> 00:01:39,640 But yeah, it came out pretty soft. 24 00:01:40,560 --> 00:01:45,740 So I'm hoping that it doesn't like bend under me while I'm trying to ride it. 25 00:01:46,280 --> 00:01:51,220 And hopefully they will try to fuck it. We'll see. 26 00:01:52,740 --> 00:01:55,140 I feel like even though I got that fucking finger. 27 00:01:55,620 --> 00:02:01,400 dildo, the Midas touch, I feel like this is more cursed, like, it's just, it's 28 00:02:01,400 --> 00:02:04,840 really, like, straddling the uncanny valley, because it's, like, supposed to 29 00:02:04,840 --> 00:02:09,680 realistic, but it's not very realistic, like, it's, like, very, very veiny in 30 00:02:09,680 --> 00:02:14,480 texture, it's kind of like an alien cock, but, like, in the flesh tone with, 31 00:02:14,600 --> 00:02:18,700 like, the human aesthetic, I don't know, it's very creepy, like, look at the 32 00:02:18,700 --> 00:02:23,740 fucking balls, looks like a brain or something, yeah, anyway. 33 00:02:24,520 --> 00:02:28,280 I'm gonna get my ass down there, we'll get a nice seated size of this thing up 34 00:02:28,280 --> 00:02:32,880 against me, and then we'll see how much of it I'm able to take and how long I'm 35 00:02:32,880 --> 00:02:33,880 able to fuck it. 36 00:02:35,960 --> 00:02:36,960 Alright. 37 00:02:38,120 --> 00:02:40,720 Look at this fucking size up, oh my god. 38 00:02:41,080 --> 00:02:44,740 That's such a fucking tube steak of a cock, Jesus Christ. 39 00:02:46,700 --> 00:02:53,500 Um, upon strapping this thing up, Um, I am feeling like this isn't going to go 40 00:02:53,500 --> 00:03:00,420 very well because that's 41 00:03:00,420 --> 00:03:07,060 the curve on the shaft plus the fucking softness of the silicone. Like it just, 42 00:03:07,140 --> 00:03:13,780 it has zero to 10 stability, I would say. Um, so I 43 00:03:13,780 --> 00:03:18,580 feel like this is going to really be a real pain in the ass. 44 00:03:18,880 --> 00:03:19,880 to use. 45 00:03:21,280 --> 00:03:25,440 So I'm at least going to try to take it as deep as I can. 46 00:03:26,100 --> 00:03:30,540 I hope I should be able to at least like sit on it and get it in. 47 00:03:30,800 --> 00:03:37,000 I just feel like if I try to fuck it, like it's just going to be like folding 48 00:03:37,000 --> 00:03:43,740 me and shit. So I don't really think that's going to go well. I'm not feeling 49 00:03:43,740 --> 00:03:45,640 particularly optimistic about that. 50 00:03:46,560 --> 00:03:50,100 We'll see. Anyway, um, ah, my measuring tape's over there. Let me go get it. 51 00:03:52,040 --> 00:03:58,000 Meow, meow, meow, meow, meow, meow. Okay, let's see. So, I got the ring on 52 00:03:58,000 --> 00:04:03,020 here, so let's see how much length we're working with. 53 00:04:03,760 --> 00:04:08,080 From the tip here to that ring. 54 00:04:09,520 --> 00:04:10,520 There we go. 55 00:04:11,820 --> 00:04:13,480 What is that? I can't see. 56 00:04:14,640 --> 00:04:18,079 Looks like 13 inches to the ring. Is that correct? 57 00:04:18,820 --> 00:04:21,100 13? Okay, that's not so bad. 58 00:04:21,680 --> 00:04:26,200 I feel pretty confident that I should be able to help this thing. 59 00:04:27,700 --> 00:04:34,480 As long as the fucking curve in the shaft doesn't fight me too, too hard. 60 00:04:35,260 --> 00:04:36,280 Yeah, we'll see. 61 00:04:36,840 --> 00:04:42,580 Anyway, I just size up and let's just get this thing in me. See how this goes. 62 00:04:44,460 --> 00:04:47,960 Okay, there. You can see how droopy it is. 63 00:04:48,220 --> 00:04:53,280 It's just leaning towards the camera, completely folded over. What the fuck? 64 00:04:53,480 --> 00:04:55,140 Like, why? 65 00:04:56,100 --> 00:04:57,100 Boy. 66 00:04:59,160 --> 00:05:04,700 I didn't warm up with anything, and I feel like that might have been a bad 67 00:05:04,800 --> 00:05:10,240 because I don't think this thing is gonna be able to... 68 00:05:11,130 --> 00:05:17,850 withstand very much resistance from my pussy without fucking bending like you 69 00:05:17,850 --> 00:05:24,650 can see it's already kind of it's pretty bending you see that fuck me oh 70 00:05:24,650 --> 00:05:31,630 my god i gotta get this thing past my cervix dad oh my god this is 71 00:05:31,630 --> 00:05:37,330 so annoying already oh okay there's my cervix right there 72 00:05:38,990 --> 00:05:41,070 I just want to push it past. This should be no problem. 73 00:05:41,450 --> 00:05:45,650 See, it didn't warm up because it's not, like, a very thick toy, but... Oh, 74 00:05:45,690 --> 00:05:46,690 there it is. Okay. 75 00:05:46,990 --> 00:05:51,010 It's got a rounded head since it's realistic, so it should slip past my 76 00:05:51,010 --> 00:05:52,010 pretty easily. 77 00:05:52,550 --> 00:05:53,730 I'm just going to push it here. 78 00:05:54,150 --> 00:05:55,150 Okay. 79 00:05:55,550 --> 00:06:00,130 Oh, that's kind of tender, but... It's kind of tender, but I can't fuck with 80 00:06:00,130 --> 00:06:06,090 this thing, like... I'm laughing, and it's making it bend, like... 81 00:06:08,430 --> 00:06:13,170 you see that oh my god okay well that went past my cervix really easily 82 00:06:13,170 --> 00:06:18,830 i'm just chilling here though because i went for it really fast my body's like 83 00:06:18,830 --> 00:06:24,890 tf lily oh fuck okay okay 84 00:06:24,890 --> 00:06:29,230 now we're not getting as much folding because there's less 85 00:06:37,710 --> 00:06:44,050 of folding and also like the balls are like doing they're coming up i don't 86 00:06:44,050 --> 00:06:47,950 if you can see that on the camera yeah there you can probably see it they're 87 00:06:47,950 --> 00:06:52,390 coming up on them that's really annoying oh okay 88 00:06:52,390 --> 00:06:59,130 oh did you see that it's like so 89 00:06:59,130 --> 00:07:01,530 unstable 90 00:07:06,760 --> 00:07:10,940 I just want to get that depop so I can just have it locked in me and be done 91 00:07:10,940 --> 00:07:11,579 with it. 92 00:07:11,580 --> 00:07:16,660 I can't fuck this thing. 93 00:07:17,120 --> 00:07:18,120 Okay, 94 00:07:18,280 --> 00:07:20,260 there. I can kind of fuck it like this, I guess. 95 00:07:22,520 --> 00:07:23,920 It'll just randomly bend. 96 00:07:26,280 --> 00:07:27,280 Like that. 97 00:07:28,080 --> 00:07:29,960 It's just gone. Okay, great. 98 00:07:31,040 --> 00:07:32,040 Great, good. 99 00:07:34,700 --> 00:07:38,620 restrap it up, I guess, and try again without bouncing on it as much. 100 00:07:39,340 --> 00:07:40,340 Fuck. 101 00:07:40,900 --> 00:07:41,900 Unbelievable. 102 00:07:42,340 --> 00:07:44,780 Well, this is very quickly proving me right. 103 00:07:44,980 --> 00:07:48,960 Um, and it's definitely proving to be probably the most annoying new toy 104 00:07:48,960 --> 00:07:50,620 experience I've had in a very long time. 105 00:07:51,260 --> 00:07:52,260 Um, yeah. 106 00:07:52,680 --> 00:07:56,760 This is, like, extra large Serafina, but even more. 107 00:07:57,200 --> 00:08:01,300 Because this one doesn't have the excuse of being, like, so fucking as fucking 108 00:08:01,300 --> 00:08:03,020 huge as extra large Serafina either. 109 00:08:03,240 --> 00:08:04,240 Um, anyway. 110 00:08:04,910 --> 00:08:10,890 try this again i'm not gonna like try bouncing on it i'm just gonna try 111 00:08:10,890 --> 00:08:17,430 it i'm just gonna try fuck fuck fuck fuck oh try pushing down on it and 112 00:08:17,430 --> 00:08:24,150 hopefully that fucking curve in the shaft doesn't fight me at the 113 00:08:24,150 --> 00:08:29,730 bottom as much as it's been fighting me okay let's push that head past my cervix 114 00:08:29,730 --> 00:08:30,730 again here 115 00:08:36,079 --> 00:08:37,079 Oh. 116 00:08:38,320 --> 00:08:39,700 Oh, man. 117 00:08:39,919 --> 00:08:43,179 That's a little bit crampy. My body's a little tight because I'm annoyed. I can 118 00:08:43,179 --> 00:08:44,179 feel it. 119 00:08:45,060 --> 00:08:45,879 Don't laugh. 120 00:08:45,880 --> 00:08:49,460 If I laugh, I'm going to fucking contract my insides and push it out 121 00:08:50,140 --> 00:08:51,140 Okay. 122 00:08:51,920 --> 00:08:56,800 Just breathe here. I need the consolation prize of being able to help 123 00:08:56,800 --> 00:09:00,760 the only thing that's going to make me not completely lose my fucking mind 124 00:09:01,460 --> 00:09:02,460 Oh, my God. 125 00:09:04,000 --> 00:09:05,000 Slowly. 126 00:09:08,360 --> 00:09:09,360 Slowly. 127 00:09:10,200 --> 00:09:11,200 Okay, okay. 128 00:09:12,280 --> 00:09:13,880 So I'm trying to get that paw. 129 00:09:14,360 --> 00:09:16,600 I can feel that curve is fighting me. 130 00:09:17,160 --> 00:09:18,460 I think I'm going to have to, like, hold. 131 00:09:19,400 --> 00:09:20,900 Hold the ball and play it here. 132 00:09:21,960 --> 00:09:24,700 So it doesn't run away from me. I'm just going to push here. 133 00:09:26,200 --> 00:09:29,480 Push it in. Can I take it? Oh, I think it's going to go. 134 00:09:30,320 --> 00:09:33,940 Yeah. Oh, my God. Fuck. 135 00:09:46,380 --> 00:09:50,260 The fucking curve, the way it curves, like, towards the camera, I can feel it 136 00:09:50,260 --> 00:09:53,940 just, like, my insides are like, what the fuck is this? 137 00:09:54,460 --> 00:09:56,820 Oh, shit. 138 00:09:57,720 --> 00:09:59,540 There we go, fuck. 139 00:10:00,660 --> 00:10:01,660 Oh, my God. 140 00:10:04,460 --> 00:10:09,940 It just popped out. Oh, fuck. 141 00:10:10,260 --> 00:10:13,240 I gotta push it back in here. Let's hold down the balls again. 142 00:10:19,310 --> 00:10:21,810 The curve is fighting me even here with that final pop. 143 00:10:22,690 --> 00:10:26,390 It's in, but it doesn't feel like securely locked in. 144 00:10:27,810 --> 00:10:30,530 Like when I put all my weight on it. 145 00:12:22,250 --> 00:12:23,290 my insides 146 00:12:23,290 --> 00:12:29,810 that was 147 00:12:29,810 --> 00:12:36,170 a pretty good orgasm though I can't lie very intense 148 00:12:36,170 --> 00:12:43,090 and very long I feel like every time I'm coming from 149 00:12:43,090 --> 00:12:48,510 the depth penetration alone I think I've already described this but like the 150 00:12:48,510 --> 00:12:49,730 orgasm is just like 151 00:12:51,600 --> 00:12:57,660 it rides like the peak for so long right before kind of like and then 152 00:12:57,660 --> 00:13:04,560 like it feels like I'm like like time 153 00:13:04,560 --> 00:13:10,480 freezes in orgasm and I'm just like I'm like glitched out in the orgasm just 154 00:13:10,480 --> 00:13:17,240 like oh my god I'm really happy that 155 00:13:17,240 --> 00:13:20,540 happened though and I'm happy it didn't fucking fly out of me again 156 00:13:21,330 --> 00:13:22,330 Wow. 157 00:13:23,070 --> 00:13:28,850 Okay. Um, I'm just going to like take a break first and then turn around just to 158 00:13:28,850 --> 00:13:33,410 try squawk fucking it only to prove how terrible it's going to go. Cause I know 159 00:13:33,410 --> 00:13:37,950 it's going to go terribly, but, uh, well, yeah, just to prove it to you guys 160 00:13:37,950 --> 00:13:42,010 too. Cause I, I already know it's not going to fucking work at all. 161 00:13:43,530 --> 00:13:45,750 You made me come, but I'm not happy with you. 162 00:13:52,300 --> 00:13:59,280 you ready to see how annoyed i can be let's see let's see just how annoyed 163 00:13:59,280 --> 00:14:05,600 i can be oh my god i can't even like let go of it or it's just gonna fall oh 164 00:14:05,600 --> 00:14:10,740 yeah look at that it's already like look at that if 165 00:14:10,740 --> 00:14:16,740 i hold it maybe maybe it'll be doable if i hold it 166 00:14:21,550 --> 00:14:22,550 If I don't hold it, look. 167 00:14:23,730 --> 00:14:24,730 Yeah. 168 00:14:25,430 --> 00:14:26,450 That's what I'm dealing with. 169 00:14:27,170 --> 00:14:29,910 Let's hold it. I just need to push it, keep it straight. 170 00:14:30,550 --> 00:14:33,230 I don't know why it's designed to be so curved. 171 00:14:35,350 --> 00:14:37,730 Okay, I'm just going to push it past my cervix here. 172 00:14:38,830 --> 00:14:41,210 Oh, fuck, fuck, fuck. Oh, there it goes. Shit. 173 00:14:42,070 --> 00:14:43,070 Okay. 174 00:14:44,310 --> 00:14:46,650 Oh, don't laugh or I'm going to lose it again. 175 00:14:47,130 --> 00:14:48,310 Okay, I felt the hold it. 176 00:14:48,950 --> 00:14:50,550 Now let's see if we can push it in. 177 00:14:51,080 --> 00:14:57,600 to get that pot it's not fighting me this fucking curve is fighting me at the 178 00:14:57,600 --> 00:15:04,500 bottom here oh god it's so fighting 179 00:15:04,500 --> 00:15:11,300 me i can't even get it in oh there we go oh my god it 180 00:15:11,300 --> 00:15:15,320 went in but like it did not stay in it wouldn't stay it's just fighting me 181 00:15:15,320 --> 00:15:17,000 that's so annoying 182 00:15:23,920 --> 00:15:25,420 so curved and why are you so floppy? 183 00:15:26,720 --> 00:15:28,640 I'm so mad and annoyed. 184 00:15:29,040 --> 00:15:30,040 I hate you. 185 00:15:32,820 --> 00:15:37,880 Well, that was definitely very disappointing. 186 00:15:39,360 --> 00:15:43,440 I'm happy that I was able to bottom out on it. I'm happy that I got, like, a 187 00:15:43,440 --> 00:15:47,740 good orgasm. That was nice, but I'm probably, like, never going to use this 188 00:15:47,740 --> 00:15:49,840 again because, yeah, 189 00:15:51,160 --> 00:15:52,940 that didn't do anything that... 190 00:15:53,160 --> 00:15:58,500 Any of my other long toys can too, except actually be fuckable. 191 00:15:59,200 --> 00:16:01,200 And they locked in me properly. 192 00:16:01,580 --> 00:16:02,580 Um, yeah. 193 00:16:02,920 --> 00:16:08,280 Anyway. Very bummy. I think I'm just gonna, like, reach for something else 194 00:16:08,280 --> 00:16:13,080 because I'm feeling, like, very annoyed and very unsatisfied after this. So, uh, 195 00:16:13,140 --> 00:16:15,060 yeah. This video is definitely a flop. 196 00:16:15,740 --> 00:16:17,880 Flop! Floppy, just like you. 197 00:16:19,680 --> 00:16:20,680 Flop. 198 00:16:22,360 --> 00:16:26,120 Anyway, thanks for watching my annoyance and struggle. 15986

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