All language subtitles for Family.Reunion.S01E14.720p.NF.WEBRip.DDP5.1.x264-METCON

Family Reunion was filmed
in front of a live studio audience.

- Okay, okay. One last chemistry joke.
- Yeah.

M'kay.

Did you hear about oxygen's date
with potassium?

No.

It was O.K.

Oh!

Oh my God, I understood a chemistry joke.

Oh my God, I understood a chemistry joke!

Resist all you want, Jade.

But you like science.

And you're good at it.

Well, that's only
because you make chemistry so fun.

You're the best lab partner I've ever had.

Wait, how many lab partners have you had?

Just you.

- Oh, uh, hey, Mom and Dad.
- Hey.

This is my lab partner, Cody.

Oh!

- Yeah.
- It is so nice to meet you, Cody.

Okay, Jade.

You too, you too.

Mr. McKellan.

I am a huge fan.

Oh yeah, Dad,
Cody plays QB on the JV team.

Oh, okay!

All right, my man, Cody.

Come here.

- Ha ha. Do you want a beer?
- Oh, I don't drink.

Good answer.

Uh, we're actually running one
of your old plays, Mr. McKellan.

Oh, you must be talking
about my original quick trap.

- Then dap.
- Boop.

- Mm-mm-mm.
- Boom.

So, Cody, I hear you're the reason
Jade's actually focusing in class.

Oh, I mean, we help each other.

Yeah, Cody's helping me remember chemistry
with jokes.

- Hm!
- You wanna hear one?

Oh, I love a good chemistry joke.

Okay, perfect!

Since when?

Since our daughter brought a boy home
she has chemistry with.

Cody. Oh.

Oh!

Oh.

Okay, um, what do you call it

when somebody throws sodium chloride
at you?

I don't know.

What do you call it?

A-salt!

'Cause it's like the same...

They're throwing it.

Good thing they don't get graded on jokes.

Hi, everybody.

Oh, hi there!

I got your money right here.

Oh, uh, M'Dear, this is Cody.

Hi, Cody.

Could you make sure that the newspaper
makes it all the way up onto the porch?

Last few Sundays, it's been landing
in the middle of my azaleas.

Um... M'Dear, Cody's not the paperboy.

He's my lab partner.

This is Cody?

- Moz?
- Mm?

This is Cody?

Yeah.

I know.

Okay, me and Cody have a test
to study for, so we'll be in the parlor.

Okay, well,
you never know when I'll be in the parlor.

- I mean, I could pop up at any minute.
- Just...

See?

Have fun studying.

- Yes, yes.
- All right, man.

So...

are we gonna just ignore
the white elephant in the room?

Yeah. Hey, sweetie.

- You done studying?
- Yeah. Cody had to go home.

So, Jade, that's the crush you've been
having all those study sessions with, huh?

What happened to Drew
or that sweet Kurt boy?

You know, the black ones.

Uh, Drew ghosted and...

Ava and I friend-zoned Kurt
to save our friendship.

Oh, please, you and Ava
were not that close.

She'd get over it.

I'm sorry.

Are you seriously trying
to give my daughter

an anti-interracial dating talk?

How about we just give her
an anti-dating-until-she's-30 talk?

Not helpful. I got it.

I am with M'Dear on this one though.

What? Wh...

Why don't you like Cody?

Oh, I like him,
I just don't like him for you.

Just because he's white?

Have you forgotten that
I am a product of an interracial couple?

I did, until you made that pumpkin pie
and tried to pass it off as sweet potato.

We know the difference.

As long as Jade likes him
and he treats her well,

the race of the person
she's going out with shouldn't matter.

Cocoa...

you have to remember where you are.

Now there are some folk in these parts

who are not as open-minded
as they are on that west coast.

So what?

Do you want that kind of attention?

There are close-minded people
everywhere.

You're right.

There are plenty of people,
white and black,

who would start trouble with them
for dating outside of their race.

Wow.

I knew you two were old school,

but I didn't realize you were racist.

Wait, whoa, whoa, whoa, whoa. Wait.

We're not racist, Jade.
We're just looking out for you.

If you were really looking out for me,
you would just want me to be happy.

Ugh! Unbelievable!

Well, I'll tell you this, she didn't get
that bratty, stomping off-ness

from the black side of the family.

Woo!

I can't believe it.

She wants to be happy?

Un-be-lie-va-ble!

That's what that is!

Way to knock it down.

Yeah, this puts us
in the church league finals!

Congratulations, Christian Ballers.

Mazzi, you were on fire.
It reminds me of me back in the day.

But I was a little quicker.

- Really?
- Oh yeah, M'Dear could ball.

Oh! I'm still quick.

- See that?
- See what?

I ran to the door and back.

Oop! I did it again.

Laugh now, Mazzi.

'Cause when you face me and my dad
in the finals, you'll be crying.

Please.

I only cry when I watch This Is Us.

I'll be all over you like white on rice.

Hey, back off. Didn't your parents
teach you about manners?

Yeah, and that white rice is bad for you.
Go with the brown.

Whoa, whoa, whoa, whoa!

Cut it out, Braylan.

This is gonna be a nice, friendly game.

And Moz knows
all about nice, friendly games, don't you?

- What up, Gary?
- Mm!

You know him?

Oh, Moz knows me very well.

I was the only player in Columbus
better than your dad,

so he took me out.

Man, you know it was an accident.

You tripped me and I tore my Achilles.

That's the reason
I didn't make it to the NFL.

You were six foot eight and 100 pounds.

The only position you could play
was goal post.

Yeah, well, this goal post
was still better than you!

And my son is a chip off the old block!

- Oh!
- Ooh!

Oh, that's nothing.

Go ahead and throw up that brick.

Brick! Brick! Brick!

That's what I thought.

Well, I-I meant to do that.

Yeah, just like we planned.

That's why your pastor's going to jail.

Okay, Genevieve,

I see you.

Oh, your look is even cuter in person
than it is on the 'gram.

Not to be conceited,
but I can make a pillowcase look fierce.

A pillowcase?

Really?

Egyptian cotton,

made in China.

I love America.

Okay. Don't sleep on you, girl.

Well, if you wanted to, you could.

Right.

I see you're being bold with plaid
and paisley.

Oh. You like?

No, but I admire your courage.

Very brave.

Well...

it's hard to focus on looking cute

when M'Dear and my dad
are still living in the stone ages.

Segregation ended, like, 200 years ago.

Actually, it was only 55.

How do you know that?

I had to learn it for my citizenship exam.
I'm surprised you don't know that.

I was born in this country.
I don't have to learn about it.

If I were you, I'd tune them out

and date whomever I fancy.

If people want to stare, enjoy the show.

Speaking of,
what are you wearing to the dance?

Oh, I don't know yet. You?

Well, since the theme is fire and ice,

I'm wearing red-hot couture.

Homemade, of course.

What do you think?

I think I'm jelly that you have a date
and I don't.

Hopefully, that's about to change.
Here comes Cody!

Oh. Fingers crossed.

Hey, Jade.

Um, I have a question for you.

And the answer is yes!

So are you gonna give them to me, or what?

Wait, what?

I was asking if I could see your notes
from yesterday's class.

Oh.

- Oh!
- Yeah.

Yeah, sure.

Um...

- That's them.
- Thanks.

- Yup.
- See you later.

Yeah, you will.

I really thought he was going to ask you
to the Fire and Ice Dance.

Me too.

He will.

He's just being funny.

He's gonna turn around any second.

Any second.

It figures a sell-out like you would want
to be seen

with a glass of milk like Cody.

What goes better with milk than an Oreo?

You crawled out of your cave
just to say that?

Losers.

Whatever!

Oreos are America's favorite cookie.

Great line.

- Yes!
- Just ten seconds too late.

Oh.

- Uh, Dad.
- Mmm.

When we find a new house,
can we build a real basketball court?

Of course.
That's the only reason to get a new house.

I'm gonna be crossing over Braylan
and my jumper's gonna be...

- wet.
- Mm.

You know what? I hear you, son.
But that's the physical.

Today, we're working on the mental.

- Mental?
- Yep.

See, I played against Gary
and his game is all right,

but what he's really good at
is trash talk.

He gets all up in your face
and then he gets in your head.

Well, what does that have to do
with anything?

What?

Okay.

Here.

Take a shot.

- All right.
- Come on, man, take a shot.

You ain't nothing.

You couldn't hit the side of a barn
if you were leaning on it.

Shoot it. Shoot it!
Shoot, shoot, shoot, shoot, shoot!

Well, that's not fair.

That's the point.

I got inside your head

- and it threw you off your game.
- Oh.

- Oo, uh, your shoe's untied, son.
- Hm?

You've got to keep your head in the game.

Well, did you trash talk
when you played ball?

Man, I talked so much trash,

my nickname was "The Garbage Man."

Then a wise person told me

that the best players let their game
speak for them.

Okay.

And when we don't feed into
our opponents' trash talk,

they'll get so frustrated
that they'll start messing up.

- Got it.
- Mm.

Oh, uh, Dad, your shoes are untied.

What?

You've got to keep your head in the game.

Okay. All right.

I can definitely see that now.

So, uh, Jade...

Mm.

Would you go to the Fire and Ice Dance
with me?

- Good afternoon, party people!
- Yea...

The Fire and Ice Dance is coming up

and we are fundraising for the ice luge
with our fro-yo.

Chocolate and vanilla.

I bet you want the swirl.

Swirl. Swirl. Swirl. Swirl. Swirl...

Jade?

Jade?

Will you go to the dance with me?

I'm sorry, Cody. I can't.

Really?

I thought we were feeling each other.

No, we are.

Don't you see
how everybody's staring at us?

Judging us?

Probably because we look so good together.

I don't think that's why.

Wait, are you...
Are you trying to make this a...

black-white issue?

No, I'm not. It just...

It seems like everyone else is.

Hm.

I-I didn't realize that you cared
so much about what...

everybody else thinks.

Co... Cody...

You don't have game.
Why are your knees shaking?

Mazzi, I'm open.

Woo! Way to go, Mazzi!

Destroy those suckers!

In a Christian way, of course.

You've got soft since your playing days.

Oh!

That was a foul, referee!

I guess when Jesus made the blind man see,

he wasn't talking about you!

Big Moz.

It's a shame I'm embarrassing you
in front of your kid like this.

No. Gimme that.

It's 9 to 14.

You guys are toast.

Come on, Dad, keep your head in the game!

I am. I am.

You know, your wife is fine as wine.

Think she would go for a guy like me?

Hey, man, watch your mouth.
This can get real, real fast.

Hey, uh, ref, out of bounds.
Our ball.

Referee!

You've got a whistle, I got a whistle.
All God's children got whistles.

When you see a foul, blow yours!

Uh, no, you didn't!

You okay, Dad?

I'm fine.
That fool's just running his mouth.

But you're not ignoring him.

- We were supposed to keep our cool.
- I am keeping my cool.

That ball might disagree.

Moz, you've got to get yourself together.

You are better than this.

Don't backslide into your old ways.

He was talking about my wife.

So?

It's not like
he's talking about your momma.

- But, M'Dear, he said...
- No buts.

I told you, the best players
let their game do the talking.

She was the wise person you told me about?

Boy, I was born wise.

Now you only have a few minutes
to go out there

and show them who you are.

Unless you want me to go out there.

That's funny.

We got it, M'Dear.

Three kids have asked me
if I was a student here.

This new Japanese moisturizer works!

Uh...

Mom, they weren't actually
complimenting you.

They were distracting you so you wouldn't
see them sneak into the locker room.

What? Well, why would they go in there
when the party's out here?

- Oh.
- Yeah.

No!

Oh, no. Mom, Mom, Mom, Mom.
Please... Please don't be that chaperone.

Look, I'm not really having fun.
I'm just gonna go sit in the car.

What? Wait, you're my date!

Please don't say that out loud, okay?

Well, people know.

We're wearing matching corsages.

Still bummed about Cody?

I think I messed up.

Look, Jade, if you really like him,
tell him how you feel.

No. He probably hates me
like bleach hates ammonia.

- What?
- Oh.

It's a chemistry thing.
You wouldn't understand.

What I do understand

is telling Cody

is better than wondering what if.

Oh, Mom. You are so corny.

Look, maybe what you need
is a grand gesture.

- Okay.
- Like...

put a boombox on your shoulder, right...

- Mm-hmm.
- And stand outside his window.

What's a boombox?

Well, um...

it's like a... massive portable phone

that plays music, but doesn't text people.

What type of box is it?
And what makes it go boom?

Just forget about the boombox.

- Oh, okay.
- I think...

you should do something
so dramatic to grab his attention.

And, once you have it,

speak your truth.

Okay.

I can do that.

And the next time, don't let other people
decide who you go out with.

Except me.

Y'all need to get your fast behinds
out of this locker room right now!

I'm just a concerned student.

Your little lucky streak is about to end.

Not yet.

We're only down by one.

It was a nice comeback attempt,

but now all we have to do
is just run out the clock.

That's gonna be hard to do
without the ball.

Yes!

Tied game. Here we go.

Ah!

- I rolled my ankle.
- He tripped him on purpose!

Dad, are you okay?

I'm good. I'm good.

I'm not so good. Ah.

Ah.

Ah.

So, what are we gonna do?

What do you mean,
"What are we gonna do?"

It's the McKellans versus the Claymores
and I'm a McKellan. Come on!

Is this a joke?

Why don't you guys save yourselves
the embarrassment and quit now?

I thought about that.

Leave it to the pros, Grandma.

Come on, come on, come on!

It's Mrs. Grandma to you!

Whoa, M'Dear, that was awesome!

It was, wasn't it?

What up, ref?

That's not fair.

She's not even a real part of the team.

- Ref, I'm trying to tell you so I can...
- Oh!

- Dad.
- My bad.

Jesus is Lord.

My Achilles. You did it again!

It wasn't on purpose.

It wasn't on purpose then
and it wasn't on purpose now.

Yes, it was!

Son, you saw it, right?

Mom told me not to pick you for my team.

You know you've got weak ankles.

Great game, you two.
M'Dear, you still got it.

Yes, I do.

Now come on,
let's go get our trophy.

Okay.

Um, I'm sorry to interrupt your good time,
everyone.

You know what? I'm not sorry.

I recently hurt someone
I really like.

I was shallow

and I let other people's opinions
get in the way of my own feelings.

But that was a big mistake.

And an even bigger one
would be not telling you...

Cody...

that I like you.

I don't care who knows it.

I'm...

really sorry.

And I know it's late...

but we can still dance.

Oh, um, Jade...

I'm sorry, uh...

no.

I'm here with a date.

Thanks for your apology.

I'll see you around.

Wow, Jade.

- You should really think about...
- She should what?

Have a great night.

Mommy will dance with you!

I brought you some fro-yo.

So do you want the chocolate
or the vanilla?

They were all out of the swirl.

Not funny, Mom.

Aww.

I am so sorry my advice didn't work.

That's okay.

I know you were just trying to help.

And I am actually glad
I got it off my chest.

Even if I was rejected in front of
every human being I know!

I am proud of you, sweetie.

Ooh, you are so much braver
than I was at your age.

Hold up.

So you told me to do something
that you would never do?

Honey, that's called parenting.