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1
00:00:00,708 --> 00:00:02,460
Carey.
2
00:00:02,460 --> 00:00:04,713
I never had a chance to thank
you properly for liberating me
3
00:00:04,713 --> 00:00:05,963
from Mimi's apartment.
4
00:00:05,963 --> 00:00:07,549
Oh, you're welcome, sir.
5
00:00:07,549 --> 00:00:09,508
I just wish I could have got
there before she bathed you.
6
00:00:09,508 --> 00:00:10,635
Ah.
7
00:00:11,677 --> 00:00:13,846
The baths weren't so bad.
8
00:00:13,846 --> 00:00:16,599
It was the shaving
that bothered me.
9
00:00:16,599 --> 00:00:18,184
'Anyway, that's
all in the past.'
10
00:00:18,184 --> 00:00:20,061
I have to live my life
one day at a time now.
11
00:00:20,061 --> 00:00:21,980
The way God gave it to us.
12
00:00:21,980 --> 00:00:24,607
At least that's what the puppet
told me at the Crisis Center.
13
00:00:25,816 --> 00:00:27,610
Well, kudos to the puppet, sir.
14
00:00:27,610 --> 00:00:31,072
He also told me I should express
my feelings more openly.
15
00:00:31,072 --> 00:00:32,782
Beginning by
giving you a big hug.
16
00:00:33,908 --> 00:00:35,409
I suppose you should stand up.
17
00:00:35,409 --> 00:00:37,787
And, uh, we'll advance
on each other
18
00:00:37,787 --> 00:00:39,748
at a slow and steady pace.
19
00:00:41,499 --> 00:00:42,792
Until we make contact
20
00:00:42,792 --> 00:00:44,627
at which point
we'll close arms.
21
00:00:44,627 --> 00:00:46,129
- Alright.
- Alright.
22
00:00:49,423 --> 00:00:51,301
Mmm, you're softer
than the puppet.
23
00:00:54,095 --> 00:00:56,180
So, can I call you tomorrow?
24
00:00:56,180 --> 00:00:58,808
Oh, I'm sorry. I just had
a lot of dates end this way.
25
00:01:00,059 --> 00:01:01,560
Don't be embarrassed, Drew.
26
00:01:01,560 --> 00:01:03,980
We've turned a corner
now in our relationship.
27
00:01:03,980 --> 00:01:06,357
I feel comfortable
calling you "friend."
28
00:01:06,357 --> 00:01:08,150
Well, now that you feel that way
29
00:01:08,150 --> 00:01:10,195
there's a few things I wouldn't
mind getting off my chest.
30
00:01:10,195 --> 00:01:11,905
I'm here for you, pal.
31
00:01:11,905 --> 00:01:15,325
Well... first of all,
you're a strong boss.
32
00:01:15,325 --> 00:01:16,367
I mean, you're a good boss
33
00:01:16,367 --> 00:01:18,327
but, you know,
you can just
34
00:01:18,327 --> 00:01:19,996
you can just be
a little mean sometimes.
35
00:01:21,414 --> 00:01:23,457
Alright, that's fair.
36
00:01:23,457 --> 00:01:26,043
And when you're mean
to me like that...
37
00:01:26,043 --> 00:01:28,421
...you know, it just
makes me feel bad.
38
00:01:30,547 --> 00:01:32,174
So you're saying
I hurt your feelings?
39
00:01:32,174 --> 00:01:33,259
Yeah.
40
00:01:36,763 --> 00:01:39,599
I'm sorry, Drew.
Tell me more.
41
00:01:39,599 --> 00:01:42,059
Well, you know, it's just
hard being stuck in this job.
42
00:01:42,059 --> 00:01:45,146
I mean, I had such high
expectations from myself.
43
00:01:45,146 --> 00:01:47,023
When I was a kid
I imagined myself being a
44
00:01:47,023 --> 00:01:49,442
you know, captain
of a big ship or something.
45
00:01:52,445 --> 00:01:56,157
There's one more thing.
I never told anybody this.
46
00:01:56,157 --> 00:01:57,533
I can't even look at you
when I say it.
47
00:01:57,533 --> 00:01:59,076
That's alright.
48
00:01:59,076 --> 00:02:00,745
[sighs]
49
00:02:00,745 --> 00:02:03,122
Sometimes, I cry at night.
50
00:02:03,122 --> 00:02:04,790
And... you're
an insensitive bastard
51
00:02:04,790 --> 00:02:06,166
'cause you'd only
have people behind me.
52
00:02:06,166 --> 00:02:08,252
You haven't changed one bit.
53
00:02:08,252 --> 00:02:10,547
["Cleveland Rocks"]
54
00:02:15,051 --> 00:02:18,262
♪ All this energy callin' me ♪
55
00:02:18,262 --> 00:02:21,349
♪ Back where it comes from ♪
56
00:02:21,349 --> 00:02:24,519
♪ It's such a crude attitude ♪
57
00:02:24,519 --> 00:02:27,438
♪ It's back where it belongs ♪
58
00:02:27,438 --> 00:02:30,650
♪ All the little chicks
with the crimson lips go ♪
59
00:02:30,650 --> 00:02:33,778
♪ Cleveland rocks
Cleveland rocks ♪
60
00:02:33,778 --> 00:02:37,198
♪ Livin' in sin
with a safety pin goin' ♪
61
00:02:37,198 --> 00:02:49,002
♪ Cleveland rocks ♪
62
00:02:50,169 --> 00:02:51,337
Ohio!
63
00:02:57,634 --> 00:02:59,929
Hey, Drew. Ever wonder what
your life would be like
64
00:02:59,929 --> 00:03:01,556
if you're a woman?
65
00:03:04,058 --> 00:03:06,561
Every day, my friend.
Every day.
66
00:03:08,228 --> 00:03:09,688
Na, I'm serious.
67
00:03:09,688 --> 00:03:12,066
I had a dream last night
where I was a woman...
68
00:03:12,066 --> 00:03:13,901
Okay, go ahead and laugh.
69
00:03:13,901 --> 00:03:16,153
I'm not gonna laugh,
that took a lot of guts.
70
00:03:16,153 --> 00:03:17,697
So were you pretty?
71
00:03:19,073 --> 00:03:22,744
Uh, I was alright,
but you were a knockout.
72
00:03:24,203 --> 00:03:25,371
- I was a woman too?
- Oh...
73
00:03:25,371 --> 00:03:27,457
Long legs, blond hair
74
00:03:27,457 --> 00:03:29,750
and those come-hither eyes.
75
00:03:29,750 --> 00:03:33,338
So, uh, you think I would've
had a chance with me?
76
00:03:34,546 --> 00:03:35,632
None.
77
00:03:36,882 --> 00:03:38,217
- Hey, guys.
- Why so late?
78
00:03:38,217 --> 00:03:39,802
Uh, we were havin' sex.
79
00:03:39,802 --> 00:03:42,346
It just took a little longer
than we expected.
80
00:03:42,346 --> 00:03:44,015
We don't need to hear that.
What's next?
81
00:03:44,015 --> 00:03:46,142
Jumpin' up on the pool table
and doin' it?
82
00:03:49,437 --> 00:03:51,897
Come on, I eat pizza
off this thing.
83
00:03:51,897 --> 00:03:53,524
Drew, we're kidding.
84
00:03:56,068 --> 00:03:57,612
Hey, Drew, good news.
85
00:03:57,612 --> 00:04:00,114
What was the most fun
you had in high school?
86
00:04:00,114 --> 00:04:02,199
Oh, the time the lunch lady
threw out that Chi-cake
87
00:04:02,199 --> 00:04:04,535
at Mr. Trash
and landed face up.
88
00:04:06,204 --> 00:04:08,080
No, read this.
89
00:04:08,080 --> 00:04:10,457
Oh, battles of the bands
at the Warsaw.
90
00:04:10,457 --> 00:04:11,834
Yeah, that sounds like fun.
We should go.
91
00:04:11,834 --> 00:04:12,960
Keep reading.
92
00:04:12,960 --> 00:04:14,963
Free chicken wings?
93
00:04:15,796 --> 00:04:16,797
Keep goin'.
94
00:04:16,797 --> 00:04:18,841
First prize, 500 bucks.
95
00:04:18,841 --> 00:04:21,552
Wow. You could buy a lot of
chicken wings with 500 bucks.
96
00:04:23,137 --> 00:04:24,638
I just had a great idea.
97
00:04:24,638 --> 00:04:26,390
We should get
the old band back together.
98
00:04:26,390 --> 00:04:28,184
Yeah. Lot of people said
you couldn't play Zeppelin
99
00:04:28,184 --> 00:04:29,852
with a brass band.
We showed 'em.
100
00:04:31,603 --> 00:04:33,522
We could win 500 bucks.
101
00:04:33,522 --> 00:04:35,149
Yeah, so let's
start practicin'.
102
00:04:35,149 --> 00:04:36,483
Yeah, that sounds great.
103
00:04:36,483 --> 00:04:38,361
But first let's find out
why Kate said "we."
104
00:04:39,987 --> 00:04:43,157
I-I was thinking maybe
I could be in the band too.
105
00:04:43,157 --> 00:04:44,742
Remember when you
tried out for choir
106
00:04:44,742 --> 00:04:46,201
they made you get
your hearing checked.
107
00:04:46,201 --> 00:04:48,203
[laughs]
108
00:04:48,203 --> 00:04:50,456
Okay, okay, so I was
a little rough in high school.
109
00:04:50,456 --> 00:04:52,541
But then I joined
the church choir
110
00:04:52,541 --> 00:04:54,168
and they said
my voice was so strong
111
00:04:54,168 --> 00:04:57,171
I didn't even need a microphone.
112
00:04:57,171 --> 00:05:00,466
So, you were the only one in
the choir without a microphone?
113
00:05:01,801 --> 00:05:02,927
Yeah.
114
00:05:06,931 --> 00:05:08,016
Alright.
115
00:05:08,974 --> 00:05:12,353
Okay. I understand.
116
00:05:12,353 --> 00:05:15,272
Oh, Oswald honey, can I
talk to you for a minute
117
00:05:15,272 --> 00:05:16,273
in the kitchen?
118
00:05:16,273 --> 00:05:17,608
Oh, sure, Katie bear.
119
00:05:18,692 --> 00:05:20,028
Whipped man walkin'.
120
00:05:22,905 --> 00:05:26,951
Don't you worry about me.
I got it all under control.
121
00:05:26,951 --> 00:05:28,952
Hey, just 'cause you say "jump"
122
00:05:28,952 --> 00:05:30,913
doesn't mean I say "How high?"
123
00:05:33,499 --> 00:05:34,667
Gee, who do you think
he'll side with?
124
00:05:34,667 --> 00:05:36,794
Us, or the person
he just had sex with?
125
00:05:41,799 --> 00:05:42,800
Hey, hey, you guys...
126
00:05:42,800 --> 00:05:44,302
Uh, I-I was just thinkin'...
127
00:05:44,302 --> 00:05:47,596
...all on my own
and everything that, uh...
128
00:05:47,596 --> 00:05:52,684
...that Kate's-Kate's voice
has... gotten a lot better.
129
00:05:52,684 --> 00:05:54,395
Look, Oswald, it's not
that we don't want--
130
00:05:54,395 --> 00:05:56,480
Please! Please! Please
don't make me go back in there
131
00:05:56,480 --> 00:05:58,733
with a "no."
Have some compassion, man.
132
00:06:01,319 --> 00:06:02,903
Enough?
133
00:06:02,903 --> 00:06:04,781
Those don't look like
real tears to me.
134
00:06:06,574 --> 00:06:07,867
Help me.
135
00:06:10,411 --> 00:06:12,705
Oh, okay, man.
She gets to be in the band.
136
00:06:12,705 --> 00:06:15,249
Really?
Thank you.
137
00:06:17,918 --> 00:06:19,087
Katie bear!
138
00:06:20,504 --> 00:06:21,755
Yes?
139
00:06:21,755 --> 00:06:23,507
It's alright, you're
in the band. No problem.
140
00:06:23,507 --> 00:06:24,634
I'm in the band?
141
00:06:26,677 --> 00:06:28,596
- I'm in the band?
- Yeah.
142
00:06:28,596 --> 00:06:30,181
You really want me in the band?
143
00:06:33,392 --> 00:06:35,853
I'm in the band!
Whoo-hoo!
144
00:06:36,520 --> 00:06:37,563
[chuckles]
145
00:06:40,565 --> 00:06:42,109
[music playing]
146
00:06:42,109 --> 00:06:44,820
- Hey. Look what I found.
- Huh, what's that?
147
00:06:44,820 --> 00:06:46,197
I thought we'd give a listen
to what we used to sound like
148
00:06:46,197 --> 00:06:47,198
when we were in high school.
149
00:06:47,198 --> 00:06:48,408
Cool.
150
00:06:50,534 --> 00:06:52,536
[band music]
151
00:06:52,536 --> 00:06:56,498
(Lewis)
'Horndogs live. Take one. Check.
Check. Check. Check.'
152
00:06:56,498 --> 00:06:57,499
- 'Check. Checkmate.'
- 'In the mike, Lewis.'
153
00:06:57,499 --> 00:06:58,626
'Czechoslovakia.'
154
00:06:58,626 --> 00:07:01,795
'Chaka con. Check.. Ow!'
155
00:07:01,795 --> 00:07:04,381
(Drew)
'Give me the mike.
Oswald, you almost ready?'
156
00:07:04,381 --> 00:07:07,551
(Oswald)
'Just one second, I have to
clean my trombone first.'
157
00:07:07,551 --> 00:07:08,760
[laughing]
158
00:07:08,760 --> 00:07:10,220
(Oswald)
'Listen to my voice.'
159
00:07:10,220 --> 00:07:12,890
'I'd like a case of beer
and a woman please.'
160
00:07:14,225 --> 00:07:15,684
[fast-forwards]
161
00:07:15,684 --> 00:07:17,978
[band music]
162
00:07:17,978 --> 00:07:20,439
(male #1)
'Shut up! Your mother and I'
163
00:07:20,439 --> 00:07:23,067
'are trying to watch
Barnaby Jones up here.'
164
00:07:23,067 --> 00:07:24,652
(Drew)
'Oh, yeah? Make me.'
165
00:07:24,652 --> 00:07:26,696
(male #1)
'I don't bust my ass whole day'
166
00:07:26,696 --> 00:07:28,780
'to listen to you
and your loser friends'
167
00:07:28,780 --> 00:07:31,575
'beatin' on pans down there.'
168
00:07:31,575 --> 00:07:34,495
(Drew)
'I am so out of this house
when I turn 18.'
169
00:07:34,495 --> 00:07:36,079
'And we're not losers.'
170
00:07:36,079 --> 00:07:37,914
'Lewis is gonna be a doctor.'
171
00:07:37,914 --> 00:07:39,917
'Oswald's gonna be a lawyer.'
172
00:07:39,917 --> 00:07:41,460
'And I'm gonna
travel the world.'
173
00:07:41,460 --> 00:07:42,753
'I'm gonna lose weight'
174
00:07:42,753 --> 00:07:44,046
'and when I'm rich..'
175
00:07:49,635 --> 00:07:50,845
No more tapes.
176
00:07:52,179 --> 00:07:54,056
Okay, I'm here.
Where's my microphone?
177
00:07:54,056 --> 00:07:56,767
Promised that we wouldn't tell.
178
00:07:56,767 --> 00:07:58,102
Hey, I've been practicing.
179
00:07:58,102 --> 00:07:59,520
I know the lyrics and I can also
180
00:07:59,520 --> 00:08:01,731
sing harmony or melody.
181
00:08:01,731 --> 00:08:04,692
My best key is, uh, C Major.
182
00:08:04,692 --> 00:08:07,611
But I'm also good in D Minor F.
183
00:08:07,611 --> 00:08:10,489
- Wow. Let's try "we."
- Yeah.
184
00:08:10,489 --> 00:08:13,367
We'll do the intro and then
you come in on the break.
185
00:08:13,367 --> 00:08:14,702
(Kate)
'Got it.'
186
00:08:15,911 --> 00:08:17,830
[trumpet music]
187
00:08:25,504 --> 00:08:28,549
♪ Honey ♪
188
00:08:28,549 --> 00:08:30,218
[drum music]
189
00:08:32,928 --> 00:08:34,012
♪ Yours was ♪
190
00:08:34,012 --> 00:08:35,556
♪ The kiss ♪
191
00:08:35,556 --> 00:08:38,350
♪ That awoke my heart ♪
192
00:08:38,350 --> 00:08:41,395
♪ There lingers still ♪
193
00:08:41,395 --> 00:08:44,106
♪ Though we're far apart ♪
194
00:08:44,106 --> 00:08:47,151
♪ The taste of honey ♪
195
00:08:47,151 --> 00:08:51,197
♪ Tasting much sweeter
than wine ♪
196
00:08:52,448 --> 00:08:54,367
♪ I'll return ♪
197
00:08:58,954 --> 00:09:01,832
What's the matter, guys?
Can't keep up?
198
00:09:01,832 --> 00:09:03,209
You want me to start
from the top?
199
00:09:03,209 --> 00:09:04,502
- No.
- No!
200
00:09:06,128 --> 00:09:07,379
No, it's-it's our instruments.
201
00:09:07,379 --> 00:09:09,673
They're, uh,
badly out of tune.
202
00:09:09,673 --> 00:09:11,800
Badly out of tune.
203
00:09:11,800 --> 00:09:14,220
Horribly, hideously
out of tune.
204
00:09:15,137 --> 00:09:16,764
But they mean well.
205
00:09:18,431 --> 00:09:20,184
So tune 'em up.
206
00:09:20,184 --> 00:09:21,727
Uh, well, we can't.
207
00:09:21,727 --> 00:09:25,064
Um, because we're
all out of... tuning wax.
208
00:09:26,607 --> 00:09:29,360
- Uh, so we have to go to a--
- Tunesmith.
209
00:09:31,820 --> 00:09:33,697
So, we'll, uh, practice later?
210
00:09:33,697 --> 00:09:36,242
- Later'd be good.
- Yeah, much better.
211
00:09:36,242 --> 00:09:37,827
And remember, with me...
212
00:09:37,827 --> 00:09:40,162
...you not only get singin',
you get dancin' too.
213
00:09:40,162 --> 00:09:42,373
- Oh.
- Oh-ho!
214
00:09:43,832 --> 00:09:46,919
- Wow. That's somethin'.
- Mm-hmm.
215
00:09:50,756 --> 00:09:52,299
[indistinct]
216
00:09:52,299 --> 00:09:54,384
Wow. Is it me or
is that the worse sound
217
00:09:54,384 --> 00:09:56,595
you ever heard in your life?
218
00:09:56,595 --> 00:09:59,390
Ever start you car with a cat
sleepin' on the manifold?
219
00:10:07,356 --> 00:10:08,649
- No.
- Well, then, yeah.
220
00:10:08,649 --> 00:10:10,693
That's the worst sound
you've ever heard.
221
00:10:16,699 --> 00:10:18,700
[laughing]
222
00:10:18,700 --> 00:10:21,370
Alright, "C Magazine"
wants to thank all you kids
223
00:10:21,370 --> 00:10:23,706
for coming by to sign up
for our battle of the bands.
224
00:10:23,706 --> 00:10:26,375
[all cheering]
225
00:10:26,375 --> 00:10:29,420
We love to see the parents come
and support them. Thank you.
226
00:10:30,879 --> 00:10:33,340
We're not parents.
We're the Horndogs.
227
00:10:33,340 --> 00:10:34,758
Well, thank you, Corndogs.
228
00:10:34,758 --> 00:10:36,510
Horndogs.
229
00:10:36,510 --> 00:10:38,179
Oh, yeah, that helps it.
230
00:10:39,388 --> 00:10:40,431
Look, the battle starts at 8.
231
00:10:40,431 --> 00:10:41,891
Everybody shares amps and drums.
232
00:10:41,891 --> 00:10:43,142
You come late,
you gonna lose your spot.
233
00:10:43,142 --> 00:10:44,727
Any questions?
234
00:10:44,727 --> 00:10:46,520
The old guy.
235
00:10:46,520 --> 00:10:48,689
Are you ready to rock?
236
00:10:51,525 --> 00:10:52,777
Oh, yeah, no drinking.
237
00:10:54,987 --> 00:10:56,822
Well, good luck
to the rest of you.
238
00:10:58,699 --> 00:11:01,076
Hey, look.
It's high school reunion.
239
00:11:01,076 --> 00:11:02,369
There's "Gained the most weight"
240
00:11:02,369 --> 00:11:03,496
"Got the worst job"
241
00:11:03,496 --> 00:11:04,872
and "Still doesn't get it."
242
00:11:06,832 --> 00:11:08,668
What's that supposed to mean?
243
00:11:11,003 --> 00:11:12,046
Hey, Drew.
244
00:11:13,714 --> 00:11:15,966
- Get off me, Herbert.
- It's Herb now, blowhole.
245
00:11:15,966 --> 00:11:18,761
So, Herb, you still
stuck workin'
246
00:11:18,761 --> 00:11:20,011
down at the bottling plant?
247
00:11:20,011 --> 00:11:22,431
Yeah, we're stuck
makin' $20 an hour.
248
00:11:22,431 --> 00:11:25,559
Woah! Can you put in
a good word for me?
249
00:11:25,559 --> 00:11:27,812
Depends on where
you want me to put it.
250
00:11:29,062 --> 00:11:31,064
Besides that's just our day job.
251
00:11:31,064 --> 00:11:33,692
We still have a regular gig
down at the Holiday Inn.
252
00:11:33,692 --> 00:11:35,443
You guys are still
playing together?
253
00:11:35,443 --> 00:11:37,738
The Underprivileged are
celebrating 20 years as a band.
254
00:11:37,738 --> 00:11:39,114
- Yeah!
- Alright.
255
00:11:39,114 --> 00:11:41,324
Twenty years hanging out
with the same guys.
256
00:11:41,324 --> 00:11:42,326
Losers.
257
00:11:45,078 --> 00:11:47,373
Hey, Lewis, I saw your
ex-girlfriend last night.
258
00:11:47,373 --> 00:11:49,374
- In my bed.
- Yes, you do.
259
00:11:49,374 --> 00:11:52,586
You've been married
to her for 15 years.
260
00:11:52,586 --> 00:11:54,880
It still kills you than she
dumped you for me, doesn't it?
261
00:11:54,880 --> 00:11:56,465
She didn't dump me for you.
262
00:11:56,465 --> 00:11:58,758
She dumped me 'cause she thought
I was creepy and sad.
263
00:11:58,758 --> 00:12:00,010
- Yeah!
- Yeah.
264
00:12:03,221 --> 00:12:05,432
Just like we're gonna dump you
like in the battle of the bands.
265
00:12:05,432 --> 00:12:07,893
Ha-ha! We made a fool
out of you in high school
266
00:12:07,893 --> 00:12:09,353
and we'll do it again.
267
00:12:09,353 --> 00:12:11,396
This isn't high school, Herbert.
268
00:12:11,396 --> 00:12:13,064
There are laws.
269
00:12:13,064 --> 00:12:15,276
You just can't
drag a guy out of a gym
270
00:12:15,276 --> 00:12:17,278
and pull him naked
through the hall
271
00:12:17,278 --> 00:12:20,322
and throw him in the cafeteria...
272
00:12:20,322 --> 00:12:21,990
...during SATs.
273
00:12:21,990 --> 00:12:23,909
[laughing]
274
00:12:23,909 --> 00:12:26,537
- I forgot about that.
- Yeah, me too.
275
00:12:28,413 --> 00:12:29,748
Alright, here's something
that's been gnawing at me
276
00:12:29,748 --> 00:12:31,625
for the last 20 years.
Why didn't you help me?
277
00:12:31,625 --> 00:12:33,919
Well, those tests
are timed, Drew.
278
00:12:35,462 --> 00:12:37,381
Those days are over, man.
279
00:12:37,381 --> 00:12:38,715
Oh, by the way, Drew,
you wanna see something
280
00:12:38,715 --> 00:12:40,009
that'll burn your butt, huh?
281
00:12:41,552 --> 00:12:43,887
Eh!
282
00:12:43,887 --> 00:12:46,056
Oh, hope you like to
smoke while you drink.
283
00:12:46,056 --> 00:12:47,308
[laughs]
284
00:12:48,893 --> 00:12:50,936
Don't worry. When we beat them
tomorrow night
285
00:12:50,936 --> 00:12:52,687
we're gonna shove our butts
into their mugs.
286
00:12:52,687 --> 00:12:55,106
See how they like
the taste of that.
287
00:12:55,106 --> 00:12:56,733
- Uh... Drew, that sounds--
- I know.
288
00:12:56,733 --> 00:12:58,444
I regretted it
the minute I said it.
289
00:12:58,444 --> 00:13:01,697
Come on, come on. What's
our plan to beat these jerks?
290
00:13:01,697 --> 00:13:03,323
Well, first of all, we're gonna
practice day and night.
291
00:13:03,323 --> 00:13:05,367
We only have to be better
than them for one song.
292
00:13:05,367 --> 00:13:06,618
Yeah, and nothing
is gonna keep us
293
00:13:06,618 --> 00:13:07,911
from making
that song perfect.
294
00:13:07,911 --> 00:13:08,913
Yeah.
295
00:13:13,584 --> 00:13:15,628
Drew honey, can I talk
to you for a minute?
296
00:13:19,881 --> 00:13:23,635
Look, I love her, but we're dead
with froggy in the band.
297
00:13:23,635 --> 00:13:26,347
I know, but how can we tell her
without her hating us?
298
00:13:29,308 --> 00:13:32,102
Uh, Oswald honey, can we
talk to you for a minute?
299
00:13:35,188 --> 00:13:36,481
Yeah?
300
00:13:36,481 --> 00:13:37,983
- You wanna beat those jerks?
- Yeah.
301
00:13:37,983 --> 00:13:39,318
You wanna pay them back
making us look at Drew
302
00:13:39,318 --> 00:13:40,443
naked in high school?
303
00:13:40,443 --> 00:13:41,903
Yeah.
304
00:13:41,903 --> 00:13:43,071
You wanna tell Kate
she's out of the band?
305
00:13:43,071 --> 00:13:45,573
Yeah.
But I'm not gonna.
306
00:13:45,573 --> 00:13:47,910
Guess there's only one thing to
do. We gotta be honest with her.
307
00:13:49,411 --> 00:13:51,288
Hey, uh, Kate...
308
00:13:52,289 --> 00:13:54,666
We were talkin' and uh...
309
00:13:54,666 --> 00:13:56,668
You know, you're my friend
and I love you and everything
310
00:13:56,668 --> 00:13:58,962
but... you're the worst singer
in the history of the world.
311
00:13:58,962 --> 00:14:00,631
Man, you suck.
312
00:14:03,717 --> 00:14:06,136
Alright, but I'm better
than I was in high school.
313
00:14:10,098 --> 00:14:11,976
Well, I couldn't
have gotten worse.
314
00:14:16,772 --> 00:14:17,982
Oh, my God.
315
00:14:21,109 --> 00:14:22,527
Alright, if she's out, I'm out.
316
00:14:22,527 --> 00:14:24,654
- Kate, wait up.
- No, wait, you don't have--
317
00:14:24,654 --> 00:14:27,615
Oh, man. I should've known
it'd come to this.
318
00:14:27,615 --> 00:14:29,827
I guess we just gotta go get her
and tell her she's back in the...
319
00:14:29,827 --> 00:14:32,663
[Kate singing]
'Sweeter than wine.'
320
00:14:37,083 --> 00:14:38,544
["Now, Right Now"]
321
00:14:52,712 --> 00:14:55,632
[cheering and applause]
322
00:14:56,967 --> 00:14:58,843
Let's hear it
for The Underprivileged.
323
00:14:58,843 --> 00:15:00,637
Yeah! Whoo!
324
00:15:00,637 --> 00:15:02,222
I don't think
the crowd likes 'em.
325
00:15:02,222 --> 00:15:04,432
I can't hear you
over the applause.
326
00:15:04,432 --> 00:15:08,060
I said, I think we're screwed.
327
00:15:08,060 --> 00:15:10,062
Don't panic, Drew,
we still got a shot.
328
00:15:10,062 --> 00:15:12,398
We're getting a keyboard player
coming, wherever the hell he is.
329
00:15:12,398 --> 00:15:13,775
Hey, guys.
Sorry I'm late.
330
00:15:13,775 --> 00:15:16,194
Got hung up in surgery.
331
00:15:16,194 --> 00:15:18,905
You know, no matter how many
times you reach in and massage
332
00:15:18,905 --> 00:15:21,574
the life back into a human heart
it's always special.
333
00:15:21,574 --> 00:15:23,284
Yeah, well, I was up my elbow
in a vending machine
334
00:15:23,284 --> 00:15:26,162
I still got here on time.
335
00:15:26,162 --> 00:15:28,123
Hey, listen, I wanted to,
uh, thank you guys
336
00:15:28,123 --> 00:15:29,416
for letting me in the band.
337
00:15:29,416 --> 00:15:31,083
Hey, remember
back in high school
338
00:15:31,083 --> 00:15:33,461
when you said
I wasn't cool enough?
339
00:15:33,461 --> 00:15:34,921
We thought you
weren't cool enough?
340
00:15:34,921 --> 00:15:37,424
Holy crap! What kind of
geek were you?
341
00:15:39,842 --> 00:15:41,594
Alright. Here they are.
342
00:15:41,594 --> 00:15:42,971
The Horndogs.
343
00:15:42,971 --> 00:15:44,431
You suck!
344
00:15:46,599 --> 00:15:48,268
We haven't played a single note.
345
00:15:48,268 --> 00:15:51,062
It's not the music, I'm judging
you as a human being.
346
00:15:53,250 --> 00:15:54,500
Alright, everybody, hey.
347
00:15:54,570 --> 00:15:55,970
Thanks for coming out.
348
00:15:56,040 --> 00:15:58,770
Uh, we wanna do a song
first made famous by
349
00:15:58,840 --> 00:16:01,440
Herb Alpert
and the Tijuana Brass, 1963.
350
00:16:02,510 --> 00:16:02,780
[clears throat]
351
00:16:02,850 --> 00:16:05,930
One, two...
One, two, three, four.
352
00:16:06,000 --> 00:16:08,070
[keyboard music]
353
00:16:14,890 --> 00:16:15,590
♪ Honey ♪
354
00:16:15,660 --> 00:16:16,560
♪ Honey ♪
355
00:16:16,630 --> 00:16:18,520
♪ Honey ♪
356
00:16:20,277 --> 00:16:22,488
["A Taste Of Honey"
instrumental]
357
00:16:43,842 --> 00:16:46,470
Ladies and gentlemen,
The Unreliables!
358
00:16:46,470 --> 00:16:47,680
[applause]
359
00:16:54,811 --> 00:16:56,898
The Unreliables!
360
00:17:04,988 --> 00:17:06,489
Oswald, I wanna
ask you something.
361
00:17:06,489 --> 00:17:07,699
Sure.
362
00:17:07,699 --> 00:17:09,534
And I want you to be
completely honest.
363
00:17:09,534 --> 00:17:12,329
[sighs]
364
00:17:12,329 --> 00:17:14,248
Did you quit the band
'cause we're in a relationship?
365
00:17:14,248 --> 00:17:16,208
Or 'cause you think
I'm a good singer?
366
00:17:20,212 --> 00:17:22,048
Hey, you wanna go shoppin'?
367
00:17:25,134 --> 00:17:27,303
You don't think
I'm a good singer?
368
00:17:27,303 --> 00:17:31,098
Well, you know, what I really
think... is that--
369
00:17:31,098 --> 00:17:34,477
Are you getting ready
to jump out of the car?
370
00:17:36,270 --> 00:17:37,271
Maybe.
371
00:17:38,647 --> 00:17:39,982
Oh, my God.
I really do suck.
372
00:17:39,982 --> 00:17:41,525
And you're just
too nice to tell me.
373
00:17:41,525 --> 00:17:42,651
Well, you're nice too.
374
00:17:42,651 --> 00:17:43,860
I noticed that you slowed down
375
00:17:43,860 --> 00:17:46,489
when you thought
I was gonna jump out.
376
00:17:46,489 --> 00:17:49,450
- 'I'm sorry.'
- No, this is good.
377
00:17:49,450 --> 00:17:51,326
I think from now on
we should talk more
378
00:17:51,326 --> 00:17:52,453
and not be afraid
to be completely honest
379
00:17:52,453 --> 00:17:53,537
with each other.
380
00:17:53,537 --> 00:17:54,955
[laughs]
381
00:17:54,955 --> 00:17:56,874
That's a bad idea.
382
00:17:58,500 --> 00:18:00,085
You don't want me to be
completely honest?
383
00:18:00,085 --> 00:18:01,545
No.
384
00:18:01,545 --> 00:18:03,797
You wanna be completely
oblivious to how I feel?
385
00:18:03,797 --> 00:18:05,800
Hey, no news is good news.
386
00:18:12,681 --> 00:18:15,976
Here we go. The finalists,
in no particular order are...
387
00:18:15,976 --> 00:18:17,352
The Underprivileged.
388
00:18:17,352 --> 00:18:18,688
[cheering]
389
00:18:21,398 --> 00:18:23,191
Satan's Penis.
390
00:18:23,191 --> 00:18:24,527
[cheering]
391
00:18:27,237 --> 00:18:30,157
And... oh.
What is this ,a joke?
392
00:18:30,157 --> 00:18:31,199
The Horndogs.
393
00:18:31,199 --> 00:18:32,493
[cheering]
394
00:18:38,999 --> 00:18:41,544
What's the matter, boys?
Gettin' a little nervous?
395
00:18:41,544 --> 00:18:44,630
Not so cocky with us and
Satan's Penis right behind you.
396
00:18:48,342 --> 00:18:49,969
Oh, man.
397
00:18:49,969 --> 00:18:53,180
If they win, those 20 years
playing at the Holiday Inn
398
00:18:53,180 --> 00:18:55,182
will seem like a waste
of my life.
399
00:18:56,683 --> 00:18:59,686
Don't you worry
your pretty head about it.
400
00:18:59,686 --> 00:19:01,689
Mama's got it covered.
401
00:19:10,447 --> 00:19:11,406
Drew.
402
00:19:11,406 --> 00:19:13,325
[man groans]
403
00:19:13,325 --> 00:19:15,077
Sleep tight, pig.
404
00:19:18,038 --> 00:19:20,458
Great, it's the new guy.
405
00:19:33,345 --> 00:19:36,223
- What happened to you?
- I don't know.
406
00:19:36,223 --> 00:19:39,101
Last thing I remember was is the
overpowering smell of hatred.
407
00:19:40,977 --> 00:19:43,147
Mimi.
408
00:19:43,147 --> 00:19:45,482
Alright, first up,
the Horndogs.
409
00:19:45,482 --> 00:19:47,318
- Let's go.
- No, guys, I can't play.
410
00:19:47,318 --> 00:19:48,360
I gotta go to
the emergency room.
411
00:19:48,360 --> 00:19:49,611
Are you sure?
412
00:19:49,611 --> 00:19:51,530
I'm a doctor.
Yeah, I'm sure.
413
00:19:52,697 --> 00:19:54,491
Hey, last call, Horndogs.
414
00:19:54,491 --> 00:19:57,202
Oh, man. What're we gonna play
with just a trumpet and drum?
415
00:19:57,202 --> 00:19:58,329
Taps.
416
00:19:59,872 --> 00:20:02,875
That's it. Maybe
we'll just forfeit.
417
00:20:02,875 --> 00:20:05,335
Hey, uh, Mr. Emcee,
I got some bad news
418
00:20:05,335 --> 00:20:06,628
about the Horndogs.
419
00:20:06,628 --> 00:20:08,047
What do you got?
Two songs?
420
00:20:10,590 --> 00:20:12,592
[trombone music]
421
00:20:12,592 --> 00:20:13,761
Oswald!
422
00:20:16,263 --> 00:20:17,765
I knew you'd come back, man.
That's great.
423
00:20:17,765 --> 00:20:20,768
This is...
Oh, yeah. Lewis. hit it.
424
00:20:20,768 --> 00:20:23,771
[instrumental music]
425
00:20:32,612 --> 00:20:34,198
But, Drew, I suck.
426
00:20:49,588 --> 00:20:53,342
[all chanting]
First place!
First place! First place!
427
00:20:53,342 --> 00:20:55,219
We stole the First Place trophy
428
00:20:55,219 --> 00:20:57,388
out of Herbie's band.
429
00:21:01,000 --> 00:21:03,596
Ladies and gentlemen,
The Reverend Horton Heat!
430
00:21:05,000 --> 00:21:07,596
["Now, Right Now" by
The Reverend Horton Heat]
28900
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