Original subtitles

Don't be sick or your levels can get licked.

Just a couple of hours before you go.

Yeah, right.

Right.

Aren't you excited? It's flail.

Yeah, whatever.

I have to get home for dinner.

Please.

All right.

Some beer.

Yummy.

Thank you, poodle.

Thank you.

Dear Lord, please bless this food that we are about to eat.

We thank you for the abundance that you have provided.

Please help us to follow your path, the one you intended us all to follow.

And Lord, please help us to obey...

The roles in life you set for us.

For all that is natural and healthy and

sacred.

In your name we pray.

Amen. Amen.

See you later this week. I mean tonight.

Don't forget your library book's by the door.

Adam, bye.

So, are we ready?

I'll be here at three o 'clock.

Jesus, I hope we're doing the right thing.

Tinker Hill, here we come.

Hey, remember, 730 Doughnuts.

Kill the Rangers Me

outside

Don't

you hate it when they do that I think it's fun Maybe he just doesn't do it

Um, Jared, why are we going so slow?

Sorry.

Zoning, I guess.

Mike, thank you so much for coming all the way back out here again. Well,

what we're here for.

Thank you, Mike.

Now you watch the video.

Over and over.

Come in.

The important thing is to be clear and direct, but to do it lovingly.

We're not accusing.

We're supporting.

I think I hear the car.

Uh -oh. Here they come.

What happened? Somebody dead?

They're your favorite.

Now, why don't you just come on in and sit down, honey?

What's going on?

Hi, Megan.

My name is Mike.

Your parents and your friends want to have a conversation with you. And I'm

to help facilitate that dialogue.

So why don't we start by sitting down and making ourselves comfortable?

How would that be?

Now, Peter, would you like to start the conversation?

Megan, we love you.

We all love you. And lately we've become concerned about certain

behaviors.

We're afraid you're being influenced by a way of thinking and

unnatural.

Do you remember the woman on TV?

Honey, we think you're a lesbian.

I myself was once a gay.

Now I'm an ex -gay, Megan.

I work for a place called True Directions who help people like yourself

learn to understand the reasons behind homosexual tendencies and how to

heal them.

What tendencies?

Why would you think I'm a... You've been trying to make us eat the tofu.

In diet, watch for a switch to vegetarianism.

You don't have any pictures of guys in your locker? Just these?

Mm -hmm.

These.

Sexual. Even vaginal motifs in artwork and decorating.

Gay iconography.

You don't even like to kiss me.

It's true.

I can't believe it.

Denial is a normal part of the healing process that we'll explore at True

Directions.

Healing? Like rehab, honey. Uh, homosexuals anonymous.

Poodle. It's only for a few months.

There is no way I'm going.

la la la la

Welcome, welcome, welcome.

I'm Mary.

I'm the founder of Two Directions. And you must be Megan?

Yes.

This is my son, Rock.

Hi.

Pleasure to meet you, Megan.

Looks like we got you just in time.

What are you, about 17?

Yes. Almost lost her to college.

You know, it's so much harder once they've been through all that liberal

brainwashing. But we've saved a few.

I'll take her from here.

Well, come along. We have a little welcome video to start you in.

No one would have guessed what would happen to this sweet little girl.

By a young age, Kelly had a promising future.

Mommy's little helper and prom queen.

Kelly had hopes of being a model one day.

That is, until she was recruited into the homosexual lifestyle.

She made me do things with other women.

She drove me on the back of her Harley like I was some showpiece.

Even when she'd get high and push me off the back of her bike, I'd roll in the

gutter, broken ribs.

I just kept coming back for more.

Turn off the camera.

We never dreamed this could happen to our little girl.

But Kelly sought help.

After just two months in True Direction's easy five -step program,

rediscovered her femininity and embraced her true self.

On March 16, 1996,

Kelly was married.

The others arrived yesterday, so why don't I catch you up in a two -month

program based on five simple steps.

Why don't we concentrate on the first step?

You admitting your problem.

That when you see a woman in a tight skirt, and her long, beautiful legs,

or perhaps she's in the bathroom, putting lipstick over her full lips, or

in the locker room, soaping her body, rubbing her breasts, you don't have any

unnatural thoughts.

I don't think it's unnatural.

Aha!

You see?

You don't even think it's wrong.

Until you admit your sickness, you will wear these.

You will earn the right to wear civvies once you have admitted the first step.

It's a long path to righteousness, Megan.

And it's a battlefield of temptation out there, and you're going to have to

fight.

Until then, I'd like you to meet one of our other soldiers.

Hillary!

Megan, this is Hillary.

She will show you around.

Well, you'll get acquainted.

Okay. Rising sign at seven.

Breakfast at eight.

Group therapy until lunch.

Now in the afternoon, we have free time to do, um, yeah, whatever.

And then we move inside for reorientating exercises.

Family therapy on the weekend.

You didn't miss much, really.

This is where we sleep.

But there's no inappropriate behavior allowed.

Inappropriate?

Like swaying? No, inappropriate like fucking.

Oh. You get caught in the throes of sodomy and au revoir.

Well,

never

mind Graham.

He's a spoiled brat.

I read her chart.

Step one was easy.

Admitting you're a homosexual.

See, we all passed.

Yesterday.

I'm a homosexual.

See how easy it is?

Megan, meet the rest of our group.

Hi, Megan.

I'm Jan, and I'm a softball player, and I'm a homosexual.

I'm Sinead. I like pain.

I'm homosexual.

I'm Joel.

I'm a Jew.

And, uh... Homosexual.

We met.

Graham?

I'm Graham, and I like girls a lot.

And, um, I'm a homosexual.

Andre, actor, dancer, homosexual.

Dolph, homosexual varsity wrestler.

How you doing?

I'm Clayton Dunn. I work in retail.

I'm a homosexual.

It's time for your first disclosure.

Now, don't be intimidated.

Why don't you start by telling us about the first time that you realized that

you might be a lesbian?

I'm not.

Everyone just thinks I am.

I shouldn't even be here.

That's a perfectly normal place to start.

Why don't we discuss the issues in your intervention?

Well...

I'm a vegetarian.

Mm -hmm.

I have pictures of women around.

You think that's normal?

Sure.

I never really thought about it. Have you ever had a boyfriend?

Yes. For two years, we've been going steady.

I really love him.

He's smart and popular. He's got the biggest dick I've never seen.

Well, um, have you ever...

Had sex with him.

I'm a Christian.

It's really easy to be a prude when you're not attracted to him, isn't it?

He's very handsome.

But does he make you hot? I mean, do you think of him at night when you... I'm

not perverted.

I get good grades. I go to church.

I'm a cheerleader.

I'm not like all of you.

Everyone reads Cosmo. Everyone looks at other girls all the time.

But you only assume that they're thinking what you're thinking when they

But they're not.

Don't everybody have those thoughts?

I just want to be normal.

Then you admit you're not normal.

So why don't you admit you're a homosexual?

You hug us way too much.

Step one was easy. You don't even like to kiss me. You put your hand on my

finger. Homosexual. I think it's fun.

Homosexual. Homosexual.

Homosexual.

I'm a homosexual.

Congratulations, Megan. You have just taken your first step in your true

direction.

Okay.

Don't worry, Megan.

It's going to be okay.

Here, put these on.

Congratulations on your first step, Pom -Pom.

Don't listen to her.

She's just upset because the fish on her plate is the only kind she can eat.

I can't wait to be straight.

I've always wanted to be. It's cool to finally talk about it, you know. I mean,

I can't tell any of my friends on the team.

Maybe you have the wrong friends.

I think we should all be supporting each other.

Really, Princess, do you want to start the kumbayas?

Hi, Mom.

Flowers are pretty.

I know.

You know, I noticed that we found another leak in the ceiling. I'd like

to get to it tonight.

I'll get to it, Mom. Jesus.

Ow! I'm sorry. I didn't mean it. Look, not in my presence.

I have told you over and over again.

No more sipping.

Chug it like a man. Come on, chug.

Try and get to that tonight.

Sorry, it's just me.

What are you doing?

AV. What's it to you?

AV? What's that?

Aversion therapy. Stupid.

So what does that mean?

When you have inappropriate fantasies about girls, you shock yourself with the

shock.

So every time you think of them, you feel that pain.

That's sick.

No pain, no gain, baby. You want to like dick?

You better start training yourself.

Hey, isn't that Graham's sock?

Nothing but bad business.

Megan, you have a phone call.

Hello?

you so much we just wanted to know how our little poodle is doing i'm doing

you were right i am a homosexual but i'll be regular soon oh uh that

mary is pretty good then huh and mike and all the others i'm already starting

step two

You too, Daddy.

See you at family therapy. I love you.

In step two, we'll begin the process of everybody rediscovering their gender

identity. Now, we all know we're latent heterosexuals.

Now, what we must do is to relearn our masculinity and our femininity.

I know this might be a little confusing to some of you.

Graham.

Do you like being a pervert?

I heard you, okay? With your masculine, feminine, blah, blah, blah.

I think I have to advance the talc and chalice so I can follow this

psychobabble. This psychobabble, young lady, is the only healthy alternative to

the gay lifestyle other than guzzling a bottle of tranquilizers or clashing your

wrists.

Okay.

Now.

Who's ready to have some fun?

And forward.

Backward. And forward. And back.

In a very clean line.

Go in.

Go up.

Go down.

Girls, is everybody paying attention?

And you go in and out. And in and out. And in and out. Every

little crevice.

And out.

And you slip it in.

And out.

And you add a little more oil.

And shove it in. Take it out.

Get some muscle into it.

Shove it in.

And out.

And shove it in. Take it out.

Okay.

Who wants to go down with me?

We'll be right...

You're turning into a pretty young lady. Now, hold still.

Come on!

Die! Die! Die!

Okay,

then. Who's left to report out their route?

Andre? Shit, Miss Mary, I ain't the only one who got no route.

Andre. We don't use profanity or double negatives here at True Directions.

Okay, who's next?

Megan. Well, I've really been thinking, but I just can't think anything.

I think our little prom queen is too afraid to disclose.

Oh, really? What's your route, Graham?

We're working on your issue here, not mine. You're deflecting.

Actually, I think it might be a great idea for Megan to be reminded of your

route, Graham.

My mother got married in pants.

All right, let's see.

Dolph. Too many locker room showers in the varsity team.

Hillary.

Old girl boarding school.

Sinead. I was born in France.

Clayton. My mom let me play in her pumps.

I like balls.

Why, thank you for that, Dale.

Joel?

Traumatic breath.

So, yeah.

Now, Megan, do you see how easy it can be?

You just have to dig down into those painful memories, and you'll find it.

Now, Hillary, will you please come up here?

Today. we are going to learn one of the most wonderful things about being

heterosexual.

Friendship. So what I'd like you to all do is to start partnering off.

Find yourself a friend for the remainder of the program.

All right, everybody settle.

Now that we have all found someone, what I'd like you to do is practice sometime

tonight with these.

It's a woman. And what else? I don't know.

A mother.

Women have roles. After you learn that, you'll stop objectifying them.

Haven't you been listening to anything Mary said?

Well, have you?

Have I what?

Stopped objectifying them.

I'm still looking for my root.

Must be tough when you're such a priss.

Your turn.

You really have to be more prepared for temptation, Megan.

Don't you see how sad and pathetic you all are?

Always wanting something you can't have.

If I catch you looking at another man like that ever again, you'll be watching

sports.

The whole weekend.

The first thing we do is we pull these tabs out. And then we fold it over.

Right now, I've used food coloring. This way you can see it better.

And if it's a boy, well, it tinkles up.

That's the wrong tab, okay? Will you please hold it still while I'm doing

You're doing it all wrong. No, I'm not. If you would just give it to me to do,

it would be fine.

Girls, intervene.

Let's try that one more time.

And I realized that when we finished swimming lessons, we would change in

of each other.

And that's it.

Why I'm a homo.

Andre, that's what kids do after swimming lessons.

Change. Everybody does that. But I took one look at those boys and I got a...

You know what?

I can relate to that.

When I used to study with Jacob, we used to touch each other's legs and rub up

against each other. Blowing each other after your fucking bar mitzvah is a

little bit different than learning how to dog paddle. That is totally uncalled

for. Well, excuse me, but we're paying a lot of money here to get these kids

fixed, not sit around and listen to stories all day.

Graham, I hope you're getting a little more out of this program than that

over there.

Mr. Eaton, I don't find that appropriate.

With a stupid -ass root.

I'm never going to know why I am a... baguette.

I've heard enough of this crap.

When you get back from Switzerland, you better have this gay thing out of your

system. Got it?

I got it.

Fuck up.

No college, no car, no trust fund.

Megan, it's your turn to report out your route.

I think it might be my parents.

Okay, go with that.

You know, we've kind of been like this greeting card family.

And then there was that one year where... Well, Dad was unemployed and

to support us. Wait a minute, that was...

Only for nine months.

And then I was offered a much better job at the plant.

Well, maybe seeing Mom kind of being the dad, maybe I... Maybe I got kind of the

wrong idea about the roles of men and women.

Absolutely. You know, I can't believe that you didn't mention this earlier.

Your father was emasculated. Your mother was domineering.

Well, not exactly.

You wanted to emulate your mother. You have no respect... for men because you

don't respect your father it's really not like that megan you have found your

root in order to start healing this festering

wound i want you to write a song it's very therapeutic and it's good to put

feelings down

Up in 20!

That means inside.

What is it?

Nothing. What

am

I, contagious?

I'm stuck on five, six, seven, eight. God is good. God is straight.

Yeah, that's good.

It's not supposed to be intellectual.

Cheers are supposed to be simple, make people feel good.

Cheers make girls do stupid cartwheels, orgasms, make people feel good.

parents didn't stay very long well i imagine it gets uncomfortable sitting

long with a stick up your ass i'm sure they're just trying to do what's best

you i thought it was just an act but you really are sweet as fucking pie aren't

you this is bullshit megan it doesn't work you are who you are the only trick

not getting caught how'd you end up here

Doing what?

I had this friend. I guess we just spent a little too much time together.

What were you doing?

My stepmom called us in my room one day and sent me here.

Are you in love with her?

Does it matter?

Careful.

Drew brought you for that.

God is strange. One, two, three, four.

In birth we will be no more.

Five, six, seven, eight.

God is good.

God is strange.

Megan, thank you so much for that chair. It means so much to all of us.

Open the door, walk in behind her. Draw back your clothes,

let it remind her. No one's around,

no need to fake it.

She's not in love,

how can she fake it?

Oh, my God!

Help! Just a fucking stupid little bitch!

Ow!

Hey!

What's going on in here?

A little premature assimilation?

They were kissing! She's full of shit! Mike, we were just... Mike, we were

just... Dolph, I am really disappointed in you.

I thought you had what it took to get out of here clean.

It's time to wake Mary.

Come on. Come on!

Whoever started this is out of this house.

And the other is really in the doghouse. Not me. I can't go home.

They said they didn't list me in the name. I am not interested in anybody's

stories. I can only help those who are willing to help themselves.

Now, who started this?

Someone has got to start talking.

All right, lady, you little pervert. What? You've got one week of solitary.

And if I catch you again, you're out.

Come

on, Mary.

I just wish I could have seen those two words in action before Miss Thing over

there went Nancy Drew on us. If that little twink would have narked on me,

would have rolled.

What, would you tie her to your bed and zap her to death?

Or are you running low on batteries?

And here are our lovebirds taking a relaxing evening stroll together.

Now, notice how affectionate they are. This could be you.

And here is our happy couple at home.

Now, it's important to make your man feel at ease when he comes home from a

day at work.

Now. When it's time for lovemaking, Dan kisses Sue and touches her

breast. Women often find this sensation pleasurable.

So you miss your friends from home?

Yeah. I just can't decide who I miss more, the grunting apes in the letterman

jackets or the bulimic cheerleaders.

Go ahead, say it.

I didn't mean that.

I don't have any friends.

What about you?

I thought I did.

Did I know you were here?

Oh, yeah.

That's rough.

What's going on? It's almost lights out.

We're sneaking out. Get dressed.

But Mary.

Fuck Mary.

Oh, no way.

There's only four weeks left. There's no way I'm getting thrown out now.

Megan and I are never going to find out about this.

We haven't had fun in forever.

You could use a little fun.

What?

What if we get caught?

We're not going to get caught.

You're not coming with us, at least don't grab on us.

Let's go.

Come on, baby.

Group style. Get in.

Okay, that's your seatbelt. Wait! Oh, we have one more.

Well, it's about fucking... I can't believe I'm getting this.

Hi, I'm Lloyd Morgan Gordon. This is Larry Morgan Gordon. Glad to have you

us. You'll need one of these.

May not be an exact match, but...

First time you've all been AWOL?

Larry and Lloyd are ex -ex -gays.

From True Directions?

We were among Mary's ranks before we defected. We're just trying to provide

all with a balanced perspective to see that there are options.

In the end, it's up to you whether you choose to live a lie.

Whether you want to be who you are or keep it hidden is really more what we're

about. So you run like the Underground Homo Railroad?

Hmm.

Come on, girl.

You

didn't

tell me you were taking me to a gay bar.

Where else will we go?

I'm going to get you a drink. I don't drink.

I refuse to accept a false conclusion about my mom. I refuse to accept a false

conclusion.

What are you doing?

My interventions.

You know, you don't have to do that.

Just be yourself.

Would you like to dance?

Sure, she does.

Oh, sorry, I can't.

That's okay.

No problem.

You can't dance with a girl for one second? Go ahead.

Hi. Hi.

Sorry, I just don't dance much.

That's not what you think.

That's why we came here, right? So you could be yourself.

I don't like Sinead that way. Which way is that, close?

You weren't doing anything.

When you were going like this, you weren't doing anything. No, I wasn't,

wasn't doing that.

It doesn't matter.

Why are you freaking out?

It's none of my business.

Do what you want.

You want me to do what I want?

I could care less. What I really want?

Screw you!

I'm not supposed to like him.

I want to do that again.

what are you looking at

Night.

Night.

Come on, just throw out the first thing that comes to your head, okay? Just

think. I already did.

Mine is just as good as anybody else's.

I'm a heterosexual.

Uh, not yet, honey. You're almost there.

And don't speak out of turn.

No, I know. I've never been gay.

Jan,

remember, you were molested.

I mean, just take a look at yourself.

I mean, everybody thinks I'm this big dyke because I wear baggy pants, I play

softball, and I'm not as pretty as other girls, but that doesn't make me gay.

I mean, I like guys.

I can't help it.

I just want a big fat wiener of my... Amen, sister.

I quit.

Who in the hell is she trying to fool?

Hey, Jan!

Grew, I have found something very disturbing this morning.

I would like to know who has been sneaking out with those mud -peddling

recruiters.

I want names.

I want to know who is involved.

Find them, Grew.

What do you have to say for yourself?

Why are you looking at me?

Because I found these under your bed.

Do you have anything you'd like to confess?

I didn't sneak out.

But you know who did.

No, I don't, but, um... I did realize something about

myself last night that I was too scared to admit until now.

All right, out with it.

Come on, out with it.

I have a crush.

On Joel.

It was the first time I really felt something for a guy, you know? And it

it really proved to me that treatment's working.

Oh, great.

Now, let's... this show you what determination

has yielded.

Fruit!

Now I want you all to look at Graham's strength and how she worked her way

through this five -step program.

Oh, and by the way, I'm very disappointed in the rest of you, and I

scheduled a meeting with each of your parents.

You can't listen to me. And perhaps you'll listen to them.

No, I didn't go to the cocksucker. I've never been to the cocksucker. I won't.

My cocksucking days are over. I am normal.

Mom, Dad, you have to believe me. I swear I didn't go anywhere.

You're not going to tell your parents, are you?

No.

Now, honey, your mom and I both know that you didn't have anything to do with

that... that... Field trip to the cocksucker. Field trip to the...

But if you had gone... You have to know that you would be on your own.

What's that supposed to mean?

Well, you can't come home.

We can't allow you to live an unhealthy lifestyle under our roof.

So, Megan, if that is what you choose, you're choosing to cut us out of your

life.

Well, great.

Now,

what do you want to tell us?

Just that you don't have anything to worry about.

I've been missing Jared a lot and can't wait to see him again.

Oh, Megan, that's wonderful.

Now, you just keep up the good work and we'll be back to see you graduate.

You'll be home before you know it.

Bye -bye, sweetie.

You'll be a good girl.

Goodbye, dear.

This is Larry and Lloyd Morgan Gordon. Leave us a message.

I know you're there. Now pick it up.

Listen to me, you little inverts, okay? You want to play rough with my kids,

then I can... Play rough with you.

Time's up. Yeah, thank you.

You've got a little situation to deal with.

Adam and Eve, not Adam and Steve!

Adam and Eve, not Adam and Steve!

Adam and Eve, not Adam and Steve! Adam and Eve, not Adam and Steve! Adam and

Eve, not Adam and Steve!

Hey, I know you.

I saw you last night. Adam and Eve, not Adam and Steve!

What are you doing?

Excuse me. Oh, thanks.

You know, you were so good at being straight.

Wow. You have really big muscles.

I keep forgetting about, like, all these little things.

Get her cake.

Get her the cake.

Can I rub them?

Okay,

great, Dad.

You're really manly.

Thanks. I like that.

Manly is good.

I feel like the aggressor.

Yeah.

You will all be graded in each category.

And those of you who pass will move on to step five.

Simulated sexual...

Lifestyle. And those of you who fail will be sent home.

Boys with Mike, girls with me.

heterosexual love.

Now,

in

order to successfully navigate the treacherous sea of temptation, one must

enter a life out of homosexuality.

I've never seen such a determined girl.

And I am passing all.

But one of you.

Andre. You may pack your bags.

Now, there's cake in the kitchen.

You'll want to rest up for the simulation.

Michael, congratulations.

I just wasn't meant to be put.

You should be proud of who you are.

Hello?

I mean, you're more than just a sissy.

You're nice and clean and smart and sexy and firm

and luscious and... Excuse me.

The last thing I need right now is some fruit who just proved he's straight,

selling my ass how sexy I am.

Congratulations.

Liars, you know who you are and you know who you want ain't nobody gonna change

that shit

Breathe into my hands, I'll cut them like a blessed tree.

Are

you

still breathing?

Are you still?

Breathing, are you still breathing? Are you

still breathing?

I felt that way before.

Except... Except for what?

Don't laugh, okay?

Except for when I was cheerleading.

Really? I'm serious.

So it sounds stupid to you, but I really love it.

Cheering is the one thing that's kept me happy.

Good.

I would love to see you cheer.

Don't make fun of me. No, I'm not.

I'm not.

Do you ever think maybe I'm just jealous that you love something?

Get out of bed!

You hormonal hussy. I can't believe you did this. You were supposed to be the

role model. Now get up right now!

What did I do?

A little sleepover with Graham.

Get... Dressed right now!

You, of course, understand what your little adventure has cost you.

You will be removed from the program and the premises at once.

I understand.

And, of course, your parents have made it very clear that you are just not

welcome home anymore, so you will be left to your own devices.

I mean, there may be one thing that you can do where we could work out some kind

of a deal.

I'll let you stay and graduate with the rest of your class, but you must do me

one favor in return.

Partner in simulation with Rock.

Rock?

I don't think that'll work.

Oh,

for Pete's sake!

What?

Turn it off!

We've lost Megan. She just wasn't strong enough. But you still have a chance to

save yourself.

It's your choice.

You can run off with Megan and turn into a raging bull dyke, or you can do the

simulation and graduate and lead a normal life. There is no choice. You

here to graduate, and that is exactly what you're going to do.

Do you understand me, young lady?

That's exactly why your mother left.

Are you ready to lose your father?

Then it's settled.

Ram will partner with Rock in simulation.

Megan, you're out.

Let's get down to it.

What do you want? I need to talk to Lloyd and Larry.

But you're from True Direction.

Yeah.

Hey, not anymore!

All right, kid, get in here.

Come on, move your tush.

I can't go back.

I thought you could teach me how to be a lesbian.

What they wear, where they live, you know.

Megan, we can't help you with that.

There's not just one way to be a lesbian.

You just have to continue to be who you are.

Dolph? Megan!

Thank you so much for saving me from that place.

What are you doing here?

I live here.

Or at least until I find a way to make it on my own.

Way better than TD.

We all get our own rooms and curfew's midnight.

But we have to share bathrooms.

Well, not at the same time, of course.

Carter.

Come on, it's going to be okay.

No, it won't.

She was supposed to leave with me, and she didn't.

Whoa, slow down.

Who? Graham.

I knew it.

She was in here from the start.

Then why didn't she come with me?

Well, maybe she was scared.

Like I'm not?

Believe me.

You're better off here.

Graham, pay attention.

Action rock.

Now lean in and kiss her.

Nice, Rob.

Now feel how soft and vulnerable she is. Isn't it wonderful?

Now, Gramp.

Let him take the lead.

Little tongue.

He loves you. He wants to be with you the way God intended.

To be inside you.

His love muscle thrusting.

Megan, we thought that Dolph should take you out this week to celebrate your new

freedom. How would that be?

Sure. So, Megan, what do you want to do now?

Larry, Megan just made a very traumatic decision, and she's still moving through

that. Well, I just thought that we could check out some schools in the city, and

I could... She's not ready, sweetie.

You know, I am just asking a simple question.

I'm not interrogating her. We're going into that aggressive space again. Can I

even ask a question around here? Now I feel you moving into your victim stance.

I was not attacking.

I was verbalizing.

I just feel like you don't value my opinion anymore.

It seems like nothing I do pleases you, and I feel inadequate.

Oh.

I love my Larry Bear.

Lloyd, sorry.

Larry Bear, sorry, too.

Okay, then.

Dinner's ready.

Very good. Okay, who's next?

Okay, now remember that sex is fun.

We're making love. There's nothing dirty about it. Sex is beautiful when it's

between a man and a woman.

Mom.

Okay, now from this position, the woman will spread her legs, opening like a

flower. That's wonderful, Graham. Now at this point, the man will insert himself

into the woman.

Yes, that's it. Yes, look, that's it.

Mrs. Brown.

What is it, Joe?

What about board play? No, board play is for sissies. Real men go in, unload,

and pull out.

We

can

dance if you want.

Go ahead.

I think I need to go get some air.

I miss her.

She's scared and maybe she's making the wrong choice.

But it's her wrong choice to make.

You have to be willing to walk away.

What about you and Clayton?

Look, if he can't make a stand, he just can't make a stand.

Well, what about you?

What are you willing to do?

I am so proud of you.

Doesn't it feel great to be straight?

To be out of homosexuality?

It's not always going to be easy.

But at least we know what to do now.

Okay, girl.

Ready to go?

Give it to me.

I hope she's worth it.

Clayton? I'm doing it for you, not for Clayton.

Yeah, right.

Let's go.

Welcome to the graduating class of True Direction.

Ladies and gentlemen.

May I present our happy heterosexual!

Jesus! Bethany, why are you here?

I came to get you.

I can't go anywhere, Bethany.

That was fast.

Where's Graham?

I gotta try again.

We have all gathered on this special day to celebrate the wonderful true

direction.

And praise be.

to our higher power.

Will our graduates please stand again.

Graham Eden.

And now, I think that in closing, we should...

Graham One two three four I won't take no anymore five

six seven eight I want you to

You will wallow in the flow of your homosexual depravity with your wife.

My name is Peter and my daughter is a homosexual.

Hello, Peter.

Summer.

Open the door, walk in behind her. Draw back your pose, let it

remind her. No one's around,

no need to fake it. She's not alone,

how can she take it?

If you could love, you wouldn't do

Swish swish swish swish

We go by him.

Get up.

Get up. Get up.

And I'll push you.

That's right.

Get down.

Everybody push through. That's right.

Get down.

Everybody push through. That's right. Get down.

Everybody push through. That's right.

Get down.

Twist, twist, twist, twist.

Twist, twist, twist, twist.

Bye.

Bye.

Bye.

Bye.