Original subtitles

Are you ready, kids?

Aye, aye, Captain!

I can't hear you.

Aye, aye, Captain!

♪ Ooh!

♪ Who lives in a pineapple under the sea? ♪

♪ SpongeBob Squarepants! ♪

♪ Absorbent and yellow and porous is he ♪

♪ SpongeBob Squarepants! ♪

♪ If nautical nonsense be something you wish ♪

♪ SpongeBob Squarepants! ♪

♪ Then drop on the deck and flop like a fish ♪

♪ SpongeBob Squarepants!♪Ready?

♪ SpongeBob Squarepants!

♪ SpongeBob Squarepants!

♪ SpongeBob Squarepants!

♪ SpongeBob Squarepants!

Captioning sponsored by THE U.S. DEPARTMENT OF EDUCATION

and NICKELODEON

Ah...

I don't know how you do it, Gar Bear.

But that's the best cup of French toast I've ever had.

Well, time to punch that clock.

But not before checking

my motivational quote-a-day calendar.

"You are a winner."

And today's the first day of summer.

Happy first day of summer, Squidward.

Care to join me for solstice caroling?

♪ Walking in the grass, it's all fine ♪

♪ Don't need shoes in the summertime ♪

I'm not much of a summer person, SpongeBob.

Davy Jones on the jib!

Do my ears deceive me?

Is it really the first day of summer?

Is it?!

Yeah.

Oo-whee-hoo!

Gee, Mr. K, you sure have

a scorching case of summer fever.

What is it about summertime

that makes us so happy?

The firefly-lit nights?

The intoxicating aroma of a charcoal briquette?

The hypnotic sound of a lawn mower running over a flip-flop?

The money.

The money?

Er, uh, I mean, uh... the children.

Oh.

You see, boy, during the summer

the children are excused from their classes.

A recess commonly

referred to as summer break.

Tell me more about summer break.

Well, during the summer break

the children wander Bikini Bottom unsupervised

their pockets lined with allowance

free to spend their money

without any parental guidance whatsoever.

I guess that's what I like best.

Sure I suppose some would try

and take advantage of this situation

by selling them toys or candy.

But I sleep well at night with the knowledge

that I'm providing them with something they need...

A nutritious meal.

Come here, you little piggies!

I've been taught the true meaning of summer.

Almost closing time, Mr. K.

What?!

But that's impossible!

What about the money?!

I mean, uh... uh, what about the children?

I guess summer isn't coming this year.

Hey, maybe they're all at that new playground over there.

Playground?!

Luring away me young customers?

Warm up the boat, SpongeBob.

See anything, Mr. Krabs?

Oh, they're here all right.

Just look at them, SpongeBob.

So weak and malnourished

with nobody trying to sell them nothing.

Breaks me heart.

No!!

I got nothing to live for, SpongeBob.

The way you drove the boat

belying on the ground was kind of cool.

True.

But that's not going to get these munchkins

away from this playground.

Unless...

Hmm.

See you tomorrow, boy.

Got a lot of work to do.

You got it, Mr. Krabs.

Hey!

Another day, another dollar.

Gee, I wonder what Mr. Krabs has been up to since I saw him last

and then went home to do nothing of particular interest

till this very moment.

Huh?!

SpongeBob.

You're just in time for the grand unveiling of...

Krabby Land.

Krabby Land, sir?

Yes, Krabby Land.

Where a kid can have fun.

For the right price.

Welcome to the Krusty Krab, young man.

What's your name?

Monroe.

Nice to meet you, Monroe.

Whee!

Aha.

Okay, Money...

I mean, uh, children.

It's time for the grand unveiling of Money!

I mean, Krabby Land!

Yay!

Okay, kids, now promise Uncle Krabs

that if you get hungry while you're playing

you'll come inside for some delicious

nutritious Krabby Patties.

We promise.

All right, here we go.

I give you... Krabby Land!

Yay!

Whoa! Ooh!

Where am I?

Uh... that reminds me.

I forgot to give you these coloring books

slash liability waivers.

Everyone who hands theirs back

gets to meet the one and only Krabby the Clown.

Yay! Yay!

Have fun. And don't forget to eat plenty

of vitamin-enriched Krabby Patties...

Krabby the Clown's favorite meal.

We want Krabby! We want Krabby!

Where is Krabby, Mr. Krabs?

He'll be here after I count their money.

Just stall them.

Stall them? How do I do that?

I don't know, be entertaining.

Duh-uh... duh.

Hey, kids.

You're not Krabby the Clown.

No, I'm not. I'm, uh...

I'm Krabby's beloved sidekick

the Krabby Patty... Burglar.

Lame.

Krabby will be here soon.

He, uh, had to take the bus.

But in the meantime, let's have some fun!

You kids like bubbles?

No.

Well, you've never seen my bubbles.

Voila!

A bubble shaped like a jellyfish.

How about that?

Still lame.

Okay.

Prepare to be blown back on your tail fins.

Ta-dah!

Uh. Uh.

You stink!

Bring on the clown!

Okay.

Now for a finale.

Boo! Boo! Boo!

Boo!

Boo!

Boo!

Boo!

My eyes!

Whoa-oh-oh!

They seem to respond to me being in pain.

They enjoy other people's misery.

Hey, kids. Check this out.

I've got them right where I want them.

Aah!

Ow! Ow! Ow! Ow!

Ooh! Yow! Ow! Ooh! Yow!

Mr. Krabs

I can't take much more of this stalling stuff.

Always thinking about yourself.

Get out there and stall!

What happened to your arms and legs, boy?

The kids are using them as boomerangs.

Boomerangs?

Oh, no! They might break my windows.

What are we going to do?

Well, now that all their money's counted

tell them Krabby has just arrived.

Really? He's here?

Oh, boy, oh, boy, oh, boy, oh, boy, oh, boy...

Get out there and tell them!

Listen, everybody.

Krabby the Clown is in the building!

Who do you want?!

Krabby!

When do you want him?!

Now!

Krabby! Krabby!

Krabby! Krabby! Hooray!

Hey, kids.

Are you ready to meet Krabby the Clown?

Yay!

All right. Here you go!

Hey, kids.

Uh, thank you all for coming.

Thank you.

Eat plenty of Krabby Patties.

♪ Doo-doo, dee-doodly-doo

♪ Doo-doo, dee-doo.

Ah, Krabs, you'd done it again.

I'll say you have.

SpongeBob?

How could you, Mr. Krabs?

You promised these children Krabby the Clown.

But all I saw up there was...

Cheapy the Cheapskate.

Hey, I ain't cheap.

Now take this tomato back to the kitchen before it spoils.

But what about the true meaning of summer?

What about the children?

The children?

I don't care about the children.

I just care about their parents' money.

Ah, the fact that their feeble minds are easily manipulated

by cheap playgrounds and talentless clowns

is no skin off my nose.

Survival of the fittest, SpongeBob.

Survival of the fittest. Heh-heh.

Oh. Hey, kids.

Uh... Uncle Krabs has to go to the bank now.

Get him!

I suppose I'll never know the true meaning of summer.

I thought I knew it once

but that was a long, long time ago.

You mean this morning?

Yeah.

Come outside, Mr. Squarepants.

It's a summer miracle.

Hoorah!

Wow, thousands of dollars fluttering in the breeze.

I guess that's the true meaning of summer.

Where's Mr. Krabs?

He's missing out on all the summer fun.

Let me go!

I got to get some of that green stuff.

No!

Not that green stuff!

No!!

Ah, finally, the weekend is here

and this isn't just any old weekend.

This is the weekend SpongeBob and Patrick go camping.

Wouldn't it be great if they got lost in the woods

and never came back?

Patrick, I'm scared.

Ho-ho, that would be great.

You've waited a long time for this.

A soft bed...

Warm tea...

A good book...

And two whole days with no.

What the...?

SpongeBob... aren't you two

supposed to be camping?

We arecamping.

SpongeBob, it's not camping

if you're ten feet from your house.

It doesn't matter where you are

as long as you're outdoors.

While all those soft city folk are safe in their beds

reading books, we're out here pitting ourselves

against the formidable forces of nature.

You want to join us?

No.

Okay. Have fun inside.

What do you mean, have fun inside?

Just... have fun inside.

See you tomorrow.

Oh. Bye.

You little sneak.

I see what you're doing. What?

Don't think I can't see what you're doing.

What?

You're saying I can't take it.

But all I...

You're saying I'm soft.

You think your little "have fun inside" challenge

is going to make me come camping with you

but that is never going to happen.

There's no way I'm going to sit out here all night

with you two losers.

So get used to it.

Okay.

Have fun inside.

That's it! I'm in!

I'll show you camping.

Squidward's going to come camping with us.

Now you'll see how a real...

outdoorsman does it.

Here we are... My remote-controlled

self-assembling tent.

Watch and learn.

That was great, Squidward

but how do you get inside?

Yeah, it's all crushy-looking.

It isn't put up yet, you idiots.

Customization.

Genius.

He's tenderizing the ground.

Of course.

Write that down, write that down!

Huh?

Voila.

But what could compare to just lying out under the stars?

Well, Iworked up an appetite

as big as all outdoors.

Time for a little grub.

I suppose you two are going to stew up

some twigs and rocks, right?

No, we got something even better...

Marshmallows.

Mmm-mm.

Just like the astronauts eat.

Patrick to SpongeBob. Patrick to SpongeBob.

Do you read me? Over.

SpongeBob to Patrick.

I read you. Over.

Patrick to SpongeBob.

I like going.

Over.

SpongeBob to Patrick.

Me, too.

SpongeBob to Patrick, help yourself. Over.

Yummy.

Patrick to SpongeBob.

The deliciousness has landed.

Well, you two astronauts can eat marshmallows.

I'm going to have a can

of Swedish barnacle balls... just as soon

as I can get my can opener.

But, Squidward

didn't you take a can opener

when you hiked out here?

Why would I bother?

We're ten feet from my house.

But this is the wilderness.

It just doesn't seem to fit the camping spirit.

Pretty weenie.

All right, all right.

Give me a marshmallow.

Ha-ha-ha.

Ha-ha-ha.

Okay, besides spitting molten foodstuffs at me

what else do you do for fun?

Well... after a long day of camping

it's nice to unwind with a nice, relaxing campfire song.

I call this one "The Campfire Song Song."

♪ Let's gather round the campfire ♪

♪ And sing our campfire song ♪

♪ Our C-A-M-P-F-I-R-E S-O-N-G song ♪

♪ And if you don't think that we can sing it ♪

♪ Faster, then you're wrong

♪ But it'll help if you just sing along... ♪

♪ Bom, bom, bom

♪ C-A-M-P-F-I-R-E S-O-N-G song ♪

♪ C-A-M-P-F-I-R-E S-O-N-G song ♪

♪ And if you don't think that we ♪

♪ Can sing it faster, then you are wrong ♪

♪ But it'll help if you just sing along... ♪

♪ C-A-M-P-F-I-R-E S-O-N-G song ♪ Patrick!

♪ Song. C-A-M-P-F-I-R-E...

Squidward.

Good.

♪ It'll help...

♪ It'll help...

♪ If you just sing along...

♪ Oh, yeah!

Now, wasn't that relaxing?

No.

Thisis relaxing.

Oh, no!

I'll save you, Squidward.

Squidward, are you all right?

That's it.

Chew... chew... and swallow.

There. Better?

Better?!

I was just fine until you launched

that ballistic junk food into my windpipe!

But I had to. It's too dangerous

to play the clarinet badly out here in the wilderness.

It might attract...

a sea bear.

A sea bear?

You mean like the ones that... don't exist?!

What are you saying?

There's no such thing.

They're just a myth.

Oh, no, Squidward.

Sea bears are all too real.

It says so in the Bikini Bottom Inquirer.

"I married a Sea Bear"?

Yeah, and Fake Science Monthly.

"Sea Bears and Fairytales Are Real"?

That's the stupidest thing I've ever heard.

Well, maybe it isstupid

but it's also dumb.

Patrick's right, Squidward...

Sea Bears are no laughing matter.

Why, once I met this guy who knew this guy

who knew this guy who knew this guy

who knew this guy who knew this guy

who knew this guy

who knew this guy who knew this guy

who knew this guy who knew this guy

who knew this guy who knew this guy

who knew this guy who knew this guy

who knew this guy's cousin...

You're right!

I should be more careful.

In fact, why don't you tell me

all of the things I shouldn't do

if I want to keep the sea bears away.

Okay, that's easy.

First off, don't play the clarinet.

Okay, then what?

Never wave your flashlight back and forth really fast.

Flashlights are their natural prey.

You're kidding.

Don't stomp around... They take that

as a challenge. Yeah.

Go on.

Don't ever eat cheese.

Sliced or cubed?

Cubed. Sliced is fine.

Yeah, yeah. And?

Never wear a sombrero......in a goofy fashion.

Or clown shoes. Or a hoop skirt.

And never... Ever...

Ever! Duh!

Screech like a chimpanzee!

Wow. It's amazing

how many things can set a sea bear off.

They're horrible.

And... and suddenly, I have the sense

we're all in danger.

Why? Why?

I don't know...

Just a feeling!

No.

Yes.

No.

Squidward, please don't.

SpongeBob, what are we going to do?

A sea bear is sure to come and eat us.

Don't worry, Patrick.

I'll draw us an anti-sea bear circle in the dirt.

Good thinking.

All the experts say

it's the only defense against a sea bear attack.

Ha-ha-ha-ha. You guys are so gullible.

See? I did everything that attracts a sea bear

and nothing happened.

If sea bears really exist, why didn't one show up?

Maybe it's because you're not wearing

your sombrero in a goofy fashion.

Oh, pfft. Sorry.

How silly of me.

You mean like this?

No. Like that.

Squidward, are you okay?

No.

Quick. Jump inside our anti-sea bear circle

before he comes back.

Yeah. Sea bears often attack more than once.

Are you crazy?

A dirt circle won't stop that monster.

I'm running for my life.

No!

Don't run! Sea bears hate that.

Thanks for the tip.

I guess I'll just limp home, then.

No!

They hate limping more than running!

Well, I guess I'll just have...

I should have warned you about crawling.

What did I do that time?

I don't know. I guess he just doesn't like you.

Pretend to be somebody else.

Here, draw a circle.

Okay.

That was an oval!

It has to be a circle!

Move over!

Hey. It worked.

You guys saved my life.

Yeah. I'm glad it was just a sea bear.

This circle would never hold back a sea rhinoceros.

What attracts them?

The sound of a sea bear attack.

Huh. Good thing we're all wearing

our anti-sea rhinoceros undergarments.

Right, Squidward?

Uh-huh.

Captioning sponsored by THE U.S. DEPARTMENT OF EDUCATION

and NICKELODEON