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Oh, Lucy, isn't this exciting? In a little while, we'll land in Cuba and
meet Ricky's family.
Well, to tell you the truth, Ethel, I'm scared.
Scared? Well, weren't you when you met Fred's family for the first time? After
marrying Fred, nothing could scare me.
Oh, I sure hope they like me. Honey, they'll love you.
What if they don't? Well, so they don't. What are they going to do, start
another Spanish -American war?
Oh, honey, stop worrying. They'll love you.
Oh, just think.
You'll be visiting your relatives in a foreign land.
Sometimes I wish I'd married a Cuban.
That makes two of us.
Ricky,
what are you going to say when you meet your grandmother?
What is this, abuela?
Very good, very good.
What are you going to say, mommy?
What, dear? What are you going to say when you meet my mother?
Oh. Uh, Buenos Dias, May 3.
Buenos Dias, May 3?
Buenos Dias, Madre.
I don't think that's very nice, making fun of my Spanish.
Well, you've been making fun of my English for 15 years.
Well, that's different. Spanish is a foreign language.
Well, English is a foreign language to me.
Well, the way you speak it, it is to me, too.
I don't know why you're so worried. After all, Ricky's mother loved you when
visited you in New York. Well, I'm not worried about his mother. It's all those
other relatives. His aunts, his uncles, his nieces, his cousins, his great
-uncles, his great -aunts. Oh, now, honey, a big family's nice.
You don't know how big his family is.
Let's see. There's Uncle Pedro and Aunt Rosa.
And Uncle... Rafael. Rafael.
And Aunt Sylvia. And Aunt... Maria Peppa. Maria Peppa.
Uncle Jorge. That's Uncle George.
Mandy, Manuel, and Berta.
Guillermito Melendez. Who?
That's another uncle, Guillermo Melendez.
That's another one.
Amparo. Amparo. Eduardo.
Eduardo, he's the judge.
The twins.
The twins. If you ask me... you did not leave the island of Cuba voluntarily.
You were squeezed off.
Now, look, honey, I told you that the only one that you've got to worry about
and remember, the only one that is really important is Uncle Alberto.
Yeah, Uncle Alberto. He's the head of the family. I remember that.
That's right. He practically raised me.
You make a good impression on him and you're in.
Well, I shall certainly try. You know that.
Well, I just want to warn you it's not going to be easy.
Uncle Alberto is the one that wanted me to marry a Cuban.
What were you saying, dear?
Oh, I was saying that Uncle Alberto is the one that wanted me to marry a cute,
red -headed American.
You were not. You were saying that Uncle Alberto was the one who wanted you to
marry a Cuban girl.
I didn't say anything of the kind.
But you were going to say it. How do you know?
I might not be... able to understand what you say when you say it. But before
you say it, I can understand what you're going to say perfectly.
No wonder Uncle Albert wanted me to marry a Cuban girl.
Oh, you admit it.
But I didn't marry a Cuban girl. I married you.
Daddy, I thought you married Mommy.
Well, you and me both, partner.
And I'll bet that Uncle Albert will be glad, too, when he meets you. I hope so,
dear. Sure.
Our clipper will be landing in Havana in 15 minutes. Oh, dear, do we have to?
Honey?
Yes, there.
Honey, did we have to have this family reunion our first night in Havana?
Couldn't you have made it some other night?
And tomorrow night they've asked me to appear at the Casino Parisien here at
National. So what other night is there?
I was thinking about some night next year, maybe.
No, honey, you'll get along just fine.
Oh, I wish Fred and Ethel were going to be here.
Well, you know we invited them, but they felt it was a family reunion. They
didn't want to barge in.
Well, I feel the same way. I think I'll join Fred and Ethel. Now, Lucy, come
back here. Daddy, when is Abuela going to get here?
In a few minutes, son.
He means Grandma.
Oh.
Oh, I'm so nervous I can't remember my own name.
Thank you very much.
Oh, they're not going to understand me. I'm not going to be able to understand
them. Now, look, honey. They speak a few words of English. You speak a few words
of Spanish. Oh, I've forgotten my Spanish.
Well, you took it in high school, didn't you? Don't you remember anything?
I remember I flunked.
Well, look, all you have to remember is just a few words. If I help you, maybe
they'll come back to you. All right.
Say hello.
Hello.
Oh, in Spanish. How are you going to greet them when they get here?
Oh, buenos dias.
No, no, dear. It's not quite that. It's not buenos dias. It's buenos dias.
Oh, buenos dias. Buenos dias. Buenos dias.
That's it. Oh, but you can't use it now anyway because it's night outside.
You've got to say noches.
Noches. Buenas noches. Buenas noches. That's right. Good.
How are you?
Fine. I'm a little nervous.
¿Cómo está usted? ¿Cómo está usted?
Please, por favor.
Por favor.
Thank you, gracias.
Gracias. Thank you very much. Muchas gracias. Muchas gracias.
Now, listen. Por favor, adiós. Yeah, well, listen, honey.
Just make sure that you muchas gracias Uncle Alberto all over the place. He
likes it.
Come on, son.
Just go right there.
Honey!
This is my wife, Lucy.
They say they're very glad
to meet you and that they like you very much.
And this is my son.
This is Ricky.
I brought you. This is my drum when I was a little boy.
Muchas gracias, Uncle Alberto.
Ricardo, eh?
He looks like a Ricardo, eh?
Say, I got an idea.
Would you like to play the drums with me tomorrow night?
Oh, boy!
Okay, we'll practice tomorrow.
Alberto, quiero que conozcas a mi señora ahora, eh? Uh -huh.
Lucy?
This is Uncle Alberto.
How's that?
I was saying, you're a very pretty girl.
And where did you get that beautiful red hair?
Oh, I get it every two weeks.
I'll buy you a new one tomorrow.
Let's have some fun.
She was nervous, you know. She was nervous meeting you.
But I wasn't in love with a Cuban girl.
You'd love Lucy when you get to know her. You really would.
Very well, very well.
Oh, I'm so sorry. I was so nervous. I made a terrible impression on your
Why don't you tell him it's an old American custom?
Oh, now, what?
Well, when you like somebody, you break their hat.
Now, honey, I had us talk with him and everything's moved out. Now, you just go
over and talk with him. Oh, do I have to?
Por favor, please.
Well, what do I say?
Well, let him do the talking. Oh, okay.
Uncle Humberto?
Si, si, querida.
Would you care for some punch?
Si, macho grasa.
What? Si, macho grasa.
Oiga, que modo de tratar al tío? Son esas cosas.
What did I say? What did you say? Well, I already asked if I wanted some punch.
I said, sí, macho grasa.
Macho grasa?
There is muchas gracias. You just called him a big fat pig.
Come right off. Honey, please, honey. I'll be able to fix it for you. Sit
darling. I'll get a towel there.
My, my cigars! My cigars!
He
should
have married a Cuban girl.
Now, honey, it couldn't have been that bad.
Well, I ruined his straw hat, spilled punch on his clothes, crushed his
and called him a big fat... pig in Spanish.
Well, that's pretty bad even for you.
After what I did last night, Cuba may cut off America's sugar supply.
We're going to go to rehearse.
Hey, where'd you get that drum?
Uncle, Uncle gave it to me.
That's the drum I used to have when I was a little boy. Say,
shall we tell them the big news?
Ricky's going to appear with me tonight.
No.
anything in the world.
My whole family's coming.
I got a big table reserved.
Yeah, you better reserve one table for your family and one for me.
Oh, now, honey, what are you talking about?
After what happened last night, Uncle Alberto will never want to see me again,
much less sit at the same table with me.
No, that's not true.
Well, if the first time I met you, I said awful things, spilled stuff all
you, and acted like a first -class nincompoop, what would you have done?
Just what I did.
Wait for my clothes to come back from the cleaners and then marry you.
Boy, he's got a memory like an elephant.
Come on, partner. We've got to go to rehearsal.
Listen, after the rehearsal, I'm going to take him over to his grandma's house
and then I'm going to see Uncle Alberto. So I'll see you later.
Adios. Goodbye.
Adios.
Oh,
come on now, honey. Snap out of it.
Let's all go shopping.
Shopping again?
Yeah.
Yeah, let's go shopping. There's something I want to get. What?
A box of cigars for Uncle Alberto. I found out where he has his maid.
Maybe if I get some more for him, he'll get back in his good graces. Oh, sure
you will, Heinz. Come on.
Oh, look at me. Brown purse, blue shoes.
Heavens to Betsy.
I want to be a second. I want to get my other purse.
I'm going to get my other wallet. I left my money in this one.
This is the place, all right.
Oh, look. They make cigars by hand.
Isn't that interesting?
Yeah, how about that?
Honey, while you're buying the cigars, I think I'll go buy some more souvenirs.
Ethel, do you think I'm made of money?
Oh, I just want to buy a pair of those maracas.
Well, then we can mambo all the way to the poorhouse.
Buenos días, señora.
Buenos días.
What can I do for you? I'd like a box of Corona Grandi, please.
Por favor.
Aquí tiene sus tabacos. El mejor tabaco de La Habana. Ah, macho... I mean,
muchas gracias.
Quince pesos.
What's that?
Fifteen dollars.
Fifteen dollars?
Sí, señora.
Oh, my gosh.
¿Qué pasó?
I forgot to put my money in this purse.
I have some friends right down the street. I'll go get them and bring the
back to you.
No money? No, she can't. What do you mean, what I did, for heaven's sake?
If you hadn't grabbed a hold of my arm, I wouldn't have dropped the box. Now you
have to pay for this.
Well, how can I pay for them if you don't let me go get the money from my
friends? You stay here.
Your friends come back for you.
But they're not coming back for me.
Oh, then I call the police right now.
What are you talking about, for heaven's sake?
Why should you call the commissioner?
I need
some
more cigars.
Thank you. Thank you.
Esto lo hemos hecho en un tabaco selecto para gustos delicados de la distocancia
cubana. ¿Qué le parece? Ah, qué bien. ¿No es una cosa muy buena?
¡Eh! ¿Dónde está?
¿Dónde está? ¿Qué ha pasado?
¿Dónde está? La americana loca esa que ha venido aquí, la turista esa, hombre.
Sí, usted que ha venido, me ha comprado cigarros, se ha ido sin pagarme, y
además de eso, los ha roto y los ha pisoteado, señor.
No hay derecho.
Ángelo, ¿has visto a alguien salir por aquí?
Maybe she went out the store.
Don't worry.
I am waiting for my nephew right here.
Which one?
Ricky, the one that married the Americana.
If you think that Americana turista of yours is bad, you should meet my
nephew's wife.
No.
An American ruined a whole box of his best cigars. Sí, señor. Sí, señor
americano. Sí.
Una loca turista americana. Sí, imagínese que ha venido, los ha roto, se
pedido ir sin pagar. Sin pagar, señor.
Disappeared right before he died. No sé dónde se ha ido. Una loca turista
americana. Loquísima, loquísima.
I've got to be someplace in ten minutes.
takes great pleasure and pride in presenting a very special attraction.
Some years ago, a young boy left Cuba to go to America.
The only thing that he took with him was a drum full of rhythm and a heart full
of hope.
He's back home tonight.
Let's give him a real great welcome, Ricky Ricardo.
You see un hombre afortunado
Which means you're looking at a lucky guy
In Cuba, I'm a Cuban In the USA,
I'm a Yang Wherever I am, I'm home And I got you,
thanks You'll never see me homesick
From home I'm never away.
Wherever I am, I'm home. In Cuba or the USA.
I've got two places to hang my hat. Two barandas in which to snooze.
And in two languages they welcome me.
Good night, girls.
You don't know how wonderful it is to be back in Cuba.
And you know, I left here alone, but I didn't come back alone.
I'd like to meet my wife, a wonderful girl.
And
I'd
like to ask another member...
of the family to join me in the next number.
I'd like you to meet my son, Ricky Jr.
Hey, Cracky.
Cracky!
Now, uh, even though little Ricky was born in America,
I want to prove to you that there's a lot of Cuba in his heart.
Anyone who's a mother of a boy like that is all right with me.
And now a word from our alternate week sponsor, Instant Sanka, another fine
coffee from General Foods.
I Love Lucy, starring Lucille Ball and Desi Arnaz, was brought to you
by New Lilt, the only home permanent with squeeze bottle magic.
The fastest, easiest home permanent ever.
The part of Uncle Alberto was played by George Trevino. Mother Ricardo was Mary
Emery, and Nacho Galindo was the cigar store owner.
Eddie LeBaron played the nightclub emcee, and Barbara Logan was the
I Love Lucy is a Desilu production.
Lucille Ball and Desi Arnaz will be back next week at this same time.
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