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Would you like to inspect the original subtitles? These are the user uploaded subtitles that are being translated: 1 00:00:03,619 --> 00:00:06,160 Congratulations on your new satellite dish. 2 00:00:06,600 --> 00:00:09,580 For your safety, always blah, blah, blah. 3 00:00:10,280 --> 00:00:12,160 Never blah, blah, blah. 4 00:00:12,760 --> 00:00:14,480 How does the satellite dish work? 5 00:00:15,160 --> 00:00:18,780 Well, honey, you know when you look in the sky, you see stars? 6 00:00:19,220 --> 00:00:22,880 Mm -hmm. Well, those are the stars of your favorite TV shows. 7 00:00:23,460 --> 00:00:29,380 And the satellite dish sucks them out of the sky like a magic vacuum cleaner and 8 00:00:29,380 --> 00:00:30,380 puts them in our TV. 9 00:00:35,440 --> 00:00:38,420 You know, eventually she's going to get older and know you're just making stuff 10 00:00:38,420 --> 00:00:39,420 up. 11 00:00:39,580 --> 00:00:40,580 Am I? 12 00:00:42,280 --> 00:00:45,580 Yeah, you just told her that satellites suck TV shows out of the sky. 13 00:00:46,340 --> 00:00:47,340 Don't they? 14 00:00:48,600 --> 00:00:51,520 Dad, it doesn't make it true just because you say it like a question. 15 00:00:52,480 --> 00:00:53,480 Doesn't it? 16 00:01:08,940 --> 00:01:11,860 Grandfather will be here any minute. I can't wait to see Grandpa. 17 00:01:12,100 --> 00:01:13,540 I could really use the money. 18 00:01:15,700 --> 00:01:18,760 Hey, hey, what did I tell you about taking money from your grandfather? 19 00:01:19,520 --> 00:01:20,720 No, you could have. 20 00:01:22,480 --> 00:01:23,458 Damn right. 21 00:01:23,460 --> 00:01:26,920 Now go upstairs and put on that ugly reindeer sweater he sent you for 22 00:01:27,180 --> 00:01:28,079 Good idea. 23 00:01:28,080 --> 00:01:29,720 See, I earned my half. 24 00:01:31,380 --> 00:01:34,640 Hello, loved ones and tolerated one. 25 00:01:35,939 --> 00:01:39,660 Hello, lifelong consequence of my sister's attempt to make another man 26 00:01:40,920 --> 00:01:44,180 Bill, your father called from the expressway. He should be here any 27 00:01:44,440 --> 00:01:48,920 great. That gives me about five minutes to grow a backbone and become a man, for 28 00:01:48,920 --> 00:01:49,920 God's sake. 29 00:01:50,460 --> 00:01:52,940 To quote the last Christmas card he sent me. 30 00:01:53,560 --> 00:01:57,100 Try and make an effort. He drove all the way up from Florida to see us, and you 31 00:01:57,100 --> 00:01:58,660 can use this time to work on your relationship. 32 00:01:59,240 --> 00:02:03,100 We have worked on it. We got it down to 20 beautiful minutes once every few 33 00:02:03,100 --> 00:02:04,100 years. 34 00:02:04,620 --> 00:02:08,759 Beautiful, huh? You two sit on the couch barely talking while he eats a bag of 35 00:02:08,759 --> 00:02:10,440 nuts, and once they're gone, so is he. 36 00:02:10,780 --> 00:02:12,960 I don't get it. He's such a sweet guy. 37 00:02:13,220 --> 00:02:16,500 You only like him because he feeds you all those cheesy compliments. 38 00:02:16,880 --> 00:02:17,880 I do not. 39 00:02:18,700 --> 00:02:20,260 God, that's probably him. 40 00:02:22,340 --> 00:02:25,940 I do realize you're prettying yourself up for my dad, right? 41 00:02:27,760 --> 00:02:28,800 You think I look pretty? 42 00:02:29,070 --> 00:02:30,070 Pretty creepy. 43 00:02:31,810 --> 00:02:32,830 Hey, Grandpa. 44 00:02:33,790 --> 00:02:36,230 Oh, my God, look at the size of you, sport. 45 00:02:36,590 --> 00:02:38,950 Last time I was here, you were a little pipsqueak. 46 00:02:39,250 --> 00:02:41,050 Now it looks like this joint has a bouncer. 47 00:02:42,090 --> 00:02:43,290 Hey, Dad! Mommy! 48 00:02:44,550 --> 00:02:45,550 Grandpa! 49 00:02:45,730 --> 00:02:50,130 Look at you two, carrot -thumping, pudding -pop as beautiful as ever. 50 00:02:50,430 --> 00:02:52,450 I'm wearing that sweater that you sent me. 51 00:02:52,710 --> 00:02:54,690 Did you put that on just so I'd give you money? 52 00:02:55,130 --> 00:02:56,130 Because it's working. 53 00:02:58,440 --> 00:02:59,920 I want money, too. 54 00:03:00,340 --> 00:03:02,960 Tina, I want money, please. 55 00:03:05,480 --> 00:03:10,720 Please. As long as you can answer one question. How does your mother get 56 00:03:10,720 --> 00:03:11,720 every year? 57 00:03:12,480 --> 00:03:16,860 Did you just giggle? 58 00:03:17,500 --> 00:03:18,700 Well, look at this one. 59 00:03:19,380 --> 00:03:21,940 One sister just as pretty as the next. 60 00:03:25,560 --> 00:03:26,860 Oh, get out of here. 61 00:03:27,120 --> 00:03:28,120 Or stay. 62 00:03:29,200 --> 00:03:31,680 Okay, kids, go put half your money away. 63 00:03:33,700 --> 00:03:34,700 Hey, Dad. 64 00:03:34,960 --> 00:03:36,920 Hey, Bill, good to see you. Come here, son. 65 00:03:40,820 --> 00:03:41,820 Oh! 66 00:03:44,300 --> 00:03:46,880 So, Al, how's Juanita? She's fine. 67 00:03:47,680 --> 00:03:49,100 Let me tell you something, Bill. 68 00:03:49,660 --> 00:03:53,140 It takes a brave man to marry a woman 20 years his junior. 69 00:03:54,780 --> 00:03:56,340 They can be very demanding. 70 00:03:57,740 --> 00:03:58,740 At bedtime. 71 00:04:01,460 --> 00:04:04,220 Sexually. Dad, Dad, forget it. 72 00:04:04,440 --> 00:04:07,800 So how's it going at that department store? They promote you to the makeup 73 00:04:07,800 --> 00:04:08,800 counter yet? 74 00:04:09,560 --> 00:04:10,800 Hey, I'm kidding. 75 00:04:11,460 --> 00:04:12,800 Why are you so sensitive? 76 00:04:13,140 --> 00:04:14,140 I didn't say anything. 77 00:04:14,220 --> 00:04:15,640 Okay, okay, I'll back off. 78 00:04:17,200 --> 00:04:20,620 Okay, we'll let you two talk. I'm sure you have a lot to catch up on. 79 00:04:35,270 --> 00:04:36,270 So how was the drive? 80 00:04:37,110 --> 00:04:38,110 Good. 81 00:04:45,970 --> 00:04:46,869 How's work? 82 00:04:46,870 --> 00:04:47,870 Good. 83 00:04:53,690 --> 00:04:54,690 How's your mother? 84 00:04:55,210 --> 00:04:56,210 Good. 85 00:04:59,510 --> 00:05:01,990 Nut? Yeah, she, uh, oh. 86 00:05:07,690 --> 00:05:11,270 I just wish Bill would develop some sort of relationship with his father. I 87 00:05:11,270 --> 00:05:14,270 mean, he never comes by. The kids barely know their grandfather. 88 00:05:14,710 --> 00:05:15,970 Yeah, that's sad. 89 00:05:16,370 --> 00:05:18,490 But the important thing is, he said I was pretty. 90 00:05:20,230 --> 00:05:22,510 Honey, come say goodbye. My dad's leaving. 91 00:05:23,210 --> 00:05:24,210 Already? 92 00:05:24,350 --> 00:05:26,310 Al, we were hoping you'd stay for dinner. 93 00:05:26,590 --> 00:05:30,970 No, thanks, honey. I got to check into my motel, and then I'm getting together 94 00:05:30,970 --> 00:05:31,970 with some friends. 95 00:05:32,330 --> 00:05:34,150 Well, Bill, why don't you go with your dad? 96 00:05:34,430 --> 00:05:35,430 What? What? 97 00:05:38,800 --> 00:05:41,060 and you'd love to have him there, wouldn't you, Al? 98 00:05:44,820 --> 00:05:45,820 I guess. 99 00:05:46,820 --> 00:05:47,820 You want to go? 100 00:05:49,440 --> 00:05:50,440 I guess. 101 00:05:51,460 --> 00:05:53,360 Great! So where are you guys going to go? 102 00:05:53,640 --> 00:05:56,540 I'm meeting some buddies from the steel mill. You know, we're going to go to the 103 00:05:56,540 --> 00:05:59,400 Sears Tower and visit our old pal Ernie and have a drink. 104 00:05:59,680 --> 00:06:01,460 Oh, Ernie lives in the Sears Tower? 105 00:06:01,980 --> 00:06:05,560 Sort of. He fell into the blast furnace when we were making the beams. 106 00:06:06,940 --> 00:06:09,160 We're pretty sure he's holding up the 32nd floor. 107 00:06:10,040 --> 00:06:12,480 So you toasted him, now you're toasting him. 108 00:06:12,760 --> 00:06:14,740 Hey, a little respect for the dead. 109 00:06:15,000 --> 00:06:16,000 Sorry. 110 00:06:17,740 --> 00:06:22,280 So I'm punching the hell out of Ernie, but that dumb son of a bitch won't go 111 00:06:22,280 --> 00:06:23,280 down. 112 00:06:23,900 --> 00:06:28,100 There was no quit in that dumb son of a bitch. Yeah, and now I got a problem. 113 00:06:28,500 --> 00:06:32,860 Ernie's one of my best friends, but that dumb son of a bitch really holds a 114 00:06:32,860 --> 00:06:36,360 grudge. Oh, you ought to love that dumb son of a bitch. 115 00:06:37,800 --> 00:06:39,460 What were you guys fighting about? 116 00:06:40,960 --> 00:06:43,040 What the hell difference does that make? 117 00:06:44,400 --> 00:06:46,320 So now, I got a dilemma. 118 00:06:46,800 --> 00:06:51,080 I gotta give him enough of a beating so that he don't remember what happened, 119 00:06:51,120 --> 00:06:52,680 but not enough so that he dies! 120 00:06:53,760 --> 00:06:56,380 And Ernie's back at work the next day. 121 00:06:56,900 --> 00:06:59,840 That's how precise a beating your old man could lay on someone. 122 00:07:05,550 --> 00:07:07,890 Glass, you deaf bastard, with toasting Ernie. 123 00:07:08,550 --> 00:07:10,630 Oh, Ernie. 124 00:07:11,170 --> 00:07:15,870 Hey, Al, you ought to tell that story about how you beat him up. 125 00:07:19,570 --> 00:07:20,950 Grinds is a little hard of hearing. 126 00:07:21,210 --> 00:07:22,910 Too many shifts near the grinder. 127 00:07:23,630 --> 00:07:27,390 So, Al, how come you never got your boy a job at the mill? Well, he couldn't 128 00:07:27,390 --> 00:07:30,090 have cut it. He was always the clean fingernails, book -running type. 129 00:07:30,310 --> 00:07:33,070 Oh, then he's a college boy, huh? 130 00:07:33,630 --> 00:07:35,130 I only went for six weeks. 131 00:07:35,390 --> 00:07:37,170 Yeah, we're drinking with Walter Shakespeare over here. 132 00:07:37,650 --> 00:07:38,650 It's William. 133 00:07:38,790 --> 00:07:41,750 Oh, college boy wants us to call him William. 134 00:07:42,050 --> 00:07:46,930 No, no, no, that's not my name. That's Shakespeare's. Well, it is my name, too, 135 00:07:47,050 --> 00:07:49,610 but... Calm down, son. You're embarrassing yourself. 136 00:07:51,050 --> 00:07:54,730 Look, let's get out of here and find a place to watch the hockey game. You 137 00:07:54,750 --> 00:07:58,150 I just got a new satellite dish. We can watch it back at my place. Fine. 138 00:07:58,950 --> 00:08:00,650 Slim, Scully, and I will meet you there. 139 00:08:00,870 --> 00:08:03,070 See you there, college boy. I plunked out. 140 00:08:03,420 --> 00:08:05,320 What? I flunked out. 141 00:08:05,600 --> 00:08:08,760 Hey, hey, watch your mouth. This is a classy place. 142 00:08:20,820 --> 00:08:21,820 Grinds, that's mine. 143 00:08:22,660 --> 00:08:23,940 Grinds, that's my beer. 144 00:08:24,340 --> 00:08:25,340 Grind! 145 00:08:26,260 --> 00:08:27,260 Ah, keep it. 146 00:08:28,600 --> 00:08:30,520 Oh, look who's home from the bar early. 147 00:08:32,840 --> 00:08:35,280 You can say old geezer. He can't hear a word you're saying. 148 00:08:36,000 --> 00:08:36,959 Where's your dad? 149 00:08:36,960 --> 00:08:40,880 Well, he was supposed to meet us back here, but that was a couple hours ago, 150 00:08:40,880 --> 00:08:41,880 I'm guessing he ditched us. 151 00:08:42,100 --> 00:08:43,140 Why would he do that? 152 00:08:43,360 --> 00:08:46,480 Because he didn't want me to go in the first place, and I didn't want to go. 153 00:08:46,480 --> 00:08:48,420 only person who wants us to be together is you. 154 00:08:48,620 --> 00:08:53,440 You are being so stubborn. I am not being stubborn. I just decided a long 155 00:08:53,440 --> 00:08:56,000 ago it's just not worth it. Oh, yes. 156 00:08:56,320 --> 00:09:00,980 The famous bow hunting trip let it go. Three miserable days of him trying to 157 00:09:00,980 --> 00:09:03,040 make me into a man, for God's sake. 158 00:09:03,760 --> 00:09:07,040 What do you need a tent for? Shelter, Dad. How about shelter? 159 00:09:07,620 --> 00:09:11,160 Bears don't need tents. Yeah, because they have fur and a cave. 160 00:09:11,540 --> 00:09:13,060 Where's my cave, Dad? 161 00:09:13,680 --> 00:09:16,080 Oh, that's nice. You made it into a little play. 162 00:09:17,240 --> 00:09:21,280 He caps it all off by putting a fake arrow through his head and letting me 163 00:09:21,280 --> 00:09:23,500 I shot him. It was a little joke. 164 00:09:23,820 --> 00:09:25,100 Oh, yeah, real funny. 165 00:09:25,740 --> 00:09:27,760 Knock, knock. Who's there? You killed your father. 166 00:09:30,400 --> 00:09:31,580 I'm turning in. 167 00:09:35,720 --> 00:09:38,260 Grimes, Grimes, this isn't your house. 168 00:09:38,760 --> 00:09:40,160 You don't live here. 169 00:09:40,740 --> 00:09:41,740 Grimes! 170 00:09:45,360 --> 00:09:46,360 Hey. 171 00:09:49,940 --> 00:09:50,940 Hey, Grimes. 172 00:09:50,960 --> 00:09:53,880 Oh, Ronald's coming over. We're going to train for the Math Olympics. 173 00:09:54,120 --> 00:09:55,220 Math Olympics? 174 00:09:56,080 --> 00:09:57,580 What country are you competing for? 175 00:09:58,220 --> 00:09:59,220 Nerdlandia? 176 00:09:59,560 --> 00:10:03,100 Go ahead and joke, Dad, but these math competitions are fierce and grueling. 177 00:10:03,180 --> 00:10:07,280 Your father and I will be there Saturday to cheer you on. Oh, Saturday. 178 00:10:07,480 --> 00:10:09,440 Let me just check my day planner. 179 00:10:11,160 --> 00:10:14,500 Ah, that's the night of the WCW Slugfest. 180 00:10:16,260 --> 00:10:18,840 Dad, don't worry about it. It's just the regional finals. 181 00:10:19,060 --> 00:10:21,900 You know, most parents will have a video camera. Maybe I can get you a tape. 182 00:10:22,080 --> 00:10:23,400 Great. We'll put it with the others. 183 00:10:26,060 --> 00:10:27,120 What? He said it was okay. 184 00:10:27,420 --> 00:10:29,300 But he doesn't mean it, and it's not okay. 185 00:10:29,500 --> 00:10:31,540 Judy, it's a math meet. 186 00:10:31,960 --> 00:10:35,860 And math plus bill equals slumber. 187 00:10:40,080 --> 00:10:41,080 Hello? 188 00:10:41,720 --> 00:10:43,340 Yeah, Al Miller's my father. 189 00:10:45,040 --> 00:10:46,040 What? 190 00:10:46,800 --> 00:10:47,800 Where? 191 00:10:49,160 --> 00:10:52,720 Okay, okay, we'll be right there. That was Good Samaritan Hospital. Apparently 192 00:10:52,720 --> 00:10:54,300 my dad's in the cardiac ward. 193 00:10:54,600 --> 00:10:55,600 Oh, my God, Brian! 194 00:10:56,430 --> 00:10:59,190 You know, we'll be back in a little while. Don't tell the kids. You're 195 00:10:59,190 --> 00:11:00,190 don't want to panic them. 196 00:11:00,350 --> 00:11:01,350 Panic me about what? 197 00:11:01,710 --> 00:11:05,210 Nothing. Your mother and I just have to rush down to the hospital. The hospital? 198 00:11:05,490 --> 00:11:09,910 No big deal. If you need us, we'll be in the cardiac ward. The cardiac ward? 199 00:11:10,590 --> 00:11:14,150 Nice job not panicking him, Bill. I didn't tell him it was Grandpa. 200 00:11:14,690 --> 00:11:15,690 Grandpa? 201 00:11:20,330 --> 00:11:23,090 My God, he looks terrible. This can't be good. 202 00:11:23,310 --> 00:11:24,310 We don't know that. 203 00:11:24,450 --> 00:11:28,220 Judy, this has got... to be serious. My dad never goes to doctors. This is the 204 00:11:28,220 --> 00:11:30,860 guy who once told me a little gangrene never hurt anybody. 205 00:11:33,500 --> 00:11:35,760 That's his dad. Could you tell us what's wrong with him? 206 00:11:36,080 --> 00:11:37,080 Let's see. 207 00:11:38,200 --> 00:11:41,040 Well, you'll have to wait for the doctor, but if you want to say something 208 00:11:41,040 --> 00:11:42,500 him, I'd say it quick. 209 00:11:43,960 --> 00:11:45,040 Did you hear that? 210 00:11:45,360 --> 00:11:48,000 Okay, calm down. We don't have all the details. 211 00:11:48,240 --> 00:11:50,240 She said if I want to talk to him, I should do it quick. 212 00:11:50,480 --> 00:11:52,840 Stop assuming the worst. That could mean anything. 213 00:11:53,440 --> 00:11:54,600 Like what, Judy? What? 214 00:11:54,940 --> 00:11:57,760 What? I don't know. Your father's dying. I was trying to be nice. 215 00:11:58,840 --> 00:11:59,840 Bill. 216 00:12:00,340 --> 00:12:02,060 Bill. He's waking up. What should I do? 217 00:12:02,300 --> 00:12:03,860 Talk to him. This could be your last chance. 218 00:12:05,940 --> 00:12:06,940 Hey, Dad. 219 00:12:07,360 --> 00:12:08,620 Man, I don't know what happened. 220 00:12:09,480 --> 00:12:12,700 I was having this terrible pain, so I took a cab over here. 221 00:12:14,020 --> 00:12:16,260 And now they're doing all sorts of tests on my heart. 222 00:12:17,620 --> 00:12:23,260 Bill, in case I don't get a chance to say it, sorry for ditching you last 223 00:12:23,580 --> 00:12:24,429 No. 224 00:12:24,430 --> 00:12:25,430 Oh, it was funny. 225 00:12:25,890 --> 00:12:27,350 Grind state for breakfast. 226 00:12:29,690 --> 00:12:36,130 Phil, I'm glad you had fun. Sometimes I feel like... like you don't like 227 00:12:36,130 --> 00:12:41,170 spending time with me. No, I don't know where you got that. I love spending time 228 00:12:41,170 --> 00:12:42,009 with you. 229 00:12:42,010 --> 00:12:44,910 Really? Sure, we had some great times together. 230 00:12:45,330 --> 00:12:46,330 What was your favorite? 231 00:12:55,530 --> 00:12:57,090 Just pick one. Any one at all. 232 00:12:59,410 --> 00:13:05,730 Uh... Well, I guess that bow hunting trip we went on was fun. 233 00:13:06,210 --> 00:13:08,050 Oh, I thought you hated that trip. 234 00:13:08,310 --> 00:13:14,390 No, it really toughened me up. You know, being in the forest in the dead of 235 00:13:14,390 --> 00:13:16,850 winter. You pretending I killed you. 236 00:13:17,590 --> 00:13:19,990 Me crying till my face froze. 237 00:13:24,190 --> 00:13:27,330 Dick. That was a fun time. 238 00:13:28,090 --> 00:13:31,150 I hope we can do that again sometime. 239 00:13:31,990 --> 00:13:33,030 You think we can? 240 00:13:34,730 --> 00:13:35,730 Yeah. 241 00:13:40,290 --> 00:13:42,730 Sure. It'll be great to do that again. 242 00:13:43,650 --> 00:13:45,390 All right, Mr. Miller. 243 00:13:46,150 --> 00:13:48,010 Your tests were fine. You can go home. 244 00:13:49,710 --> 00:13:51,510 I'm okay, Doc? He's okay? 245 00:13:51,790 --> 00:13:53,330 Yeah, just a little acid reflux. 246 00:13:53,770 --> 00:13:56,590 You might be a little shaky for a couple of hours. That's why I called your son 247 00:13:56,590 --> 00:13:59,090 to drive you home. So my father's not dying? 248 00:13:59,730 --> 00:14:01,450 Dying, no. He'll bury us all. 249 00:14:02,010 --> 00:14:04,790 But the nurse said if we had something to say to him, we should say it quick. 250 00:14:05,290 --> 00:14:07,390 Yeah, she is a real stickler for her visiting hours. 251 00:14:09,590 --> 00:14:11,390 Tonight, take it easy. Tomorrow, back to normal. 252 00:14:11,690 --> 00:14:14,650 The big question is, when can I go bow hunting with my son? 253 00:14:15,070 --> 00:14:16,990 Anytime. You hear that, son? 254 00:14:17,270 --> 00:14:19,710 The Miller men have a date with the great outdoors. 255 00:14:21,570 --> 00:14:22,970 Okay, visiting hours are over. 256 00:14:23,480 --> 00:14:24,940 You couldn't have said that the first time? 257 00:14:30,880 --> 00:14:37,740 Bravo, C -SPAN, MTV, history, showtime, cooking, learning, QVC, Chinese, 258 00:14:38,040 --> 00:14:39,040 Chinese, Chinese. 259 00:14:40,940 --> 00:14:43,860 What are you doing? I thought you and your dad would be getting ready for the 260 00:14:43,860 --> 00:14:47,120 big bow hunting trip. I haven't heard from him. I'm just hoping he's forgotten 261 00:14:47,120 --> 00:14:48,120 all about it. 262 00:14:48,240 --> 00:14:51,080 You know, kind of like my birthdays, my graduation. 263 00:14:52,220 --> 00:14:53,660 My first name a couple of times. 264 00:14:54,940 --> 00:14:57,320 Oh, what a beautiful day out there. 265 00:14:58,020 --> 00:15:01,340 Billy, get your lazy butt off that sofa. Come and help me with this stuff. 266 00:15:01,520 --> 00:15:02,520 Where'd you get all this? 267 00:15:02,980 --> 00:15:05,620 I borrowed it from Slim for our trip tomorrow. 268 00:15:06,100 --> 00:15:07,100 Tomorrow? 269 00:15:07,260 --> 00:15:10,800 Yeah. I learned the other day that the future is now. 270 00:15:11,020 --> 00:15:13,040 Life is a very precious thing. 271 00:15:16,060 --> 00:15:18,160 Let's go out there and kill us some deer. 272 00:15:20,240 --> 00:15:21,920 Gee, Dad, I don't know. 273 00:15:22,300 --> 00:15:25,140 Bill's not really the hunting type of guy. 274 00:15:25,380 --> 00:15:29,780 Don't sell Bill short as a hunter. After all, he bagged the most beautiful girl 275 00:15:29,780 --> 00:15:30,779 in Chicago. 276 00:15:30,780 --> 00:15:31,980 Oh, go on, you! 277 00:15:34,000 --> 00:15:35,340 Have a good weekend. 278 00:15:37,100 --> 00:15:40,680 Thing is, Dad, I was planning to watch a fight tomorrow night. 279 00:15:40,900 --> 00:15:44,240 What fight? I ordered the WCW Slugfest on pay -per -view. 280 00:15:44,860 --> 00:15:48,360 What, that fake wrestling with the phony balonies and tights? That's not a 281 00:15:48,360 --> 00:15:50,140 fight. Come out on the lawn, I'll show you a fight. 282 00:15:51,920 --> 00:15:55,980 Dad, I'm not going out on the lawn with you. I'm only kidding. I know you have a 283 00:15:55,980 --> 00:15:56,859 sense of humor. 284 00:15:56,860 --> 00:15:58,220 I've seen you try and play football. 285 00:15:59,520 --> 00:16:00,520 Listen to me, son. 286 00:16:01,860 --> 00:16:04,320 I realized something in that hospital bed. 287 00:16:05,760 --> 00:16:09,900 I have made a lot of unfair remarks about you being a candy ass. 288 00:16:11,460 --> 00:16:13,840 And I just want to say I'm sorry. 289 00:16:15,010 --> 00:16:16,010 Thank you. 290 00:16:16,210 --> 00:16:18,590 It's all my fault that you're a candy ass. 291 00:16:20,350 --> 00:16:26,110 What? I raised you soft, but I gotta hand it to you. It took a lot of guts to 292 00:16:26,110 --> 00:16:29,450 come to that hospital and beg me to finally make a man out of you. 293 00:16:30,430 --> 00:16:33,110 Well, I just thank God we have the second chance. 294 00:16:34,230 --> 00:16:35,970 You promised me he was dying. 295 00:16:37,070 --> 00:16:40,630 He looked like he was. Well, you're supposed to know for sure. I count on 296 00:16:40,630 --> 00:16:41,630 medical expertise. 297 00:16:42,150 --> 00:16:46,590 I'm a dental assistant. I make appointments and tell people to bite 298 00:16:46,590 --> 00:16:47,590 this. 299 00:16:47,790 --> 00:16:51,370 Well, bite down on this, because of you, I'm stuck going to the woods with a 300 00:16:51,370 --> 00:16:55,370 maniac armed with steel -tipped arrows, which are probably made out of his old 301 00:16:55,370 --> 00:16:56,370 co -workers. 302 00:16:57,690 --> 00:17:01,110 I just wanted you to have some sort of relationship with your father, but 303 00:17:01,110 --> 00:17:04,050 clearly that is not going to happen. So if you don't want to go on this trip, 304 00:17:04,109 --> 00:17:06,390 why don't you just tell him? Because I can't. 305 00:17:06,800 --> 00:17:10,500 I look him in the eye and he gives me that scary dad glare. 306 00:17:11,180 --> 00:17:14,440 Well, then, fine. Be afraid of him for the rest of your life. But you know 307 00:17:14,540 --> 00:17:16,260 Bill? He's not that scary. 308 00:17:16,819 --> 00:17:20,960 Well, not to you, maybe. The girl with the angel eyes and the smile that can 309 00:17:20,960 --> 00:17:21,960 light up a room. 310 00:17:22,079 --> 00:17:25,780 He treats me differently to how he treats you. I just wish you'd understand 311 00:17:25,780 --> 00:17:26,780 that. 312 00:17:27,440 --> 00:17:28,620 Angel eyes? Really? 313 00:17:34,100 --> 00:17:35,240 Lantern. Check. 314 00:17:35,720 --> 00:17:36,720 Compass. 315 00:17:38,219 --> 00:17:39,219 Latrine. What? 316 00:17:43,920 --> 00:17:45,920 Okay, we are off to the Math Olympics. 317 00:17:46,240 --> 00:17:47,300 Yeah, have fun on your trip, Dad. 318 00:17:47,520 --> 00:17:50,480 You want a bow and arrow in case one of them refs makes a bad call? 319 00:17:51,580 --> 00:17:53,220 No, I've got my weapon right here. 320 00:17:53,500 --> 00:17:54,500 Corpus callosum? 321 00:17:54,700 --> 00:17:56,940 Tell the left brain what the right brain is thinking. 322 00:17:59,740 --> 00:18:00,740 Oh, good luck, then. 323 00:18:02,980 --> 00:18:05,300 Oh, you guys are getting ready for the big trip? 324 00:18:06,149 --> 00:18:09,810 Bill, isn't there something you want to get out of your system that's been 325 00:18:09,810 --> 00:18:13,630 bothering you? You know, something that's been weighing you down for a long 326 00:18:13,630 --> 00:18:15,850 time? Don't worry, Judy. We got this. 327 00:18:18,890 --> 00:18:19,990 Oh, good luck, honey. 328 00:18:23,170 --> 00:18:27,070 Hey, I told you to turn off that stupid wrestling. 329 00:18:27,330 --> 00:18:31,110 This is research. That sleeper hole might come in handy if I don't kill the 330 00:18:31,110 --> 00:18:32,110 all the way. 331 00:18:32,850 --> 00:18:33,850 Okay, that's it. 332 00:18:34,510 --> 00:18:35,510 What are you doing? 333 00:18:36,240 --> 00:18:39,000 Exactly what I did with your baby blanket 40 years ago. 334 00:18:40,040 --> 00:18:41,200 Why would you do that? 335 00:18:41,760 --> 00:18:42,760 I'm doing you a favor. 336 00:18:43,320 --> 00:18:44,320 Listen, son. 337 00:18:44,420 --> 00:18:48,640 You have to learn how to live life instead of just watching it. And when 338 00:18:48,640 --> 00:18:52,660 back from this trip, you will be able to set a better example for that boy of 339 00:18:52,660 --> 00:18:53,960 yours. Make him more of a man. 340 00:18:54,220 --> 00:18:55,580 What's that supposed to mean? 341 00:18:55,900 --> 00:18:56,900 Math Olympics. 342 00:18:58,400 --> 00:19:01,220 Since when is math a sport, for God's sake? 343 00:19:02,250 --> 00:19:03,149 Brian's fine. 344 00:19:03,150 --> 00:19:06,330 He doesn't need to change. And I'm not going to pull the same crap on him you 345 00:19:06,330 --> 00:19:07,329 pulled on me. 346 00:19:07,330 --> 00:19:08,350 What are you trying to say, Bill? 347 00:19:11,610 --> 00:19:18,270 I'm trying to say... I hated that bow -hunting trip. 348 00:19:18,730 --> 00:19:20,950 I didn't want to go then. I don't want to go now. 349 00:19:22,110 --> 00:19:25,590 I only said all those nice things at the hospital because I thought you were 350 00:19:25,590 --> 00:19:26,590 dying. 351 00:19:28,010 --> 00:19:29,750 And I don't know why I'd bother. 352 00:19:31,050 --> 00:19:32,330 You're never going to change. 353 00:19:34,110 --> 00:19:36,890 Oh, ha, ha, yeah, look who's dying again. 354 00:19:38,430 --> 00:19:40,490 That's not going to work this time, Dad. 355 00:19:40,810 --> 00:19:43,770 Oh, very funny, look who's turning blue. 356 00:19:44,550 --> 00:19:45,550 Oh, crap. 357 00:19:48,410 --> 00:19:53,010 Prove that the altitudes of a triangle are bisectors in the triangle formed by 358 00:19:53,010 --> 00:19:56,850 connecting the meeting points of the altitudes with the sides of the original 359 00:19:56,850 --> 00:19:57,850 triangle. 360 00:19:58,450 --> 00:19:59,710 What are you doing here? 361 00:20:00,240 --> 00:20:01,240 Hunting trip's off. 362 00:20:01,820 --> 00:20:02,820 Where's your dad? 363 00:20:02,940 --> 00:20:03,940 In the hospital. 364 00:20:03,980 --> 00:20:04,980 So how's it going? 365 00:20:05,900 --> 00:20:07,560 In the hospital? What happened? 366 00:20:08,060 --> 00:20:10,580 I broke his rib. I'm licking him. So what did I mention? 367 00:20:12,260 --> 00:20:17,780 Bill! He'll be fine. He was choking on a peanut. The important thing is, I 368 00:20:17,780 --> 00:20:19,100 finally told him what I thought. 369 00:20:19,860 --> 00:20:21,720 So you finally got through to him, huh? 370 00:20:22,340 --> 00:20:26,640 He'll never change. But since I put him in the hospital, he's a little scared of 371 00:20:26,640 --> 00:20:27,640 me. 372 00:20:29,870 --> 00:20:33,750 You came to see Brian. Yeah, well, I decided I should work on a relationship 373 00:20:33,750 --> 00:20:35,150 can actually do something about. 374 00:20:35,510 --> 00:20:36,510 Question 33. 375 00:20:37,050 --> 00:20:38,050 Mathletes on your mark. 376 00:20:39,390 --> 00:20:43,890 Let A, B, C, and D be integers of decreasing value greater than zero. 377 00:20:44,530 --> 00:20:50,830 Suppose that A times C plus B times D equals the product of B plus D plus A 378 00:20:50,830 --> 00:20:55,410 minus C times B plus D minus A plus C. 379 00:20:56,070 --> 00:20:57,730 Prove that A times B... 380 00:20:58,010 --> 00:20:59,590 Plus C times D is none. 381 00:21:01,130 --> 00:21:02,190 Is she dumb? 382 00:21:02,430 --> 00:21:03,430 I think so. 383 00:21:03,650 --> 00:21:04,650 Oh, Brian! 384 00:21:08,010 --> 00:21:09,010 That's my boy. 385 00:21:09,270 --> 00:21:10,450 Isn't that your dad? 386 00:21:11,790 --> 00:21:12,790 No. 387 00:21:16,950 --> 00:21:22,970 For never was a story of more woe than this of Juliet and her Romeo. 388 00:21:25,740 --> 00:21:27,660 You know, Al, your son is a nice boy. 389 00:21:28,980 --> 00:21:30,680 But he can't write worth crap. 390 00:21:45,160 --> 00:21:50,860 I wouldn't have it any other way Cause you make me happy You 391 00:21:50,860 --> 00:21:53,500 make me happy 29307

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