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1
00:00:56,478 --> 00:00:59,001
康熙十六年皇帝得怪病
2
00:00:59,212 --> 00:01:01,643
有神没气有心无力
3
00:01:01,811 --> 00:01:03,743
吃不安、睡不宁
4
00:01:03,945 --> 00:01:06,843
群医束手无策，命在旦夕
5
00:01:07,145 --> 00:01:08,838
皇帝意志消沉
6
00:01:09,045 --> 00:01:11,670
唯有靠吸食大蔴逃避痛苦
7
00:01:15,644 --> 00:01:17,042
皇上，爽不爽呀？
8
00:01:23,711 --> 00:01:25,007
传护国法师
9
00:01:25,245 --> 00:01:30,370
传护国法师…传护国法师
10
00:01:36,212 --> 00:01:38,473
阿弥陀佛
11
00:01:38,945 --> 00:01:39,968
如果你也救不到我
12
00:01:40,011 --> 00:01:41,533
那真是阿弥陀佛啊
13
00:01:45,311 --> 00:01:49,244
皇上乃天子贵体，必得上天庇佑
14
00:01:49,377 --> 00:01:52,037
现在神雀五十，良方百条
15
00:01:52,245 --> 00:01:54,506
求佛祖慈悲显灵
16
00:02:06,245 --> 00:02:07,972
有事就说吧
17
00:02:09,112 --> 00:02:11,339
皇上…
18
00:02:11,611 --> 00:02:13,474
探子有军机急事报告
19
00:02:16,478 --> 00:02:17,478
急报皇上
20
00:02:17,744 --> 00:02:21,233
截获吴三桂造反武器制造蓝图一本
21
00:02:23,678 --> 00:02:25,974
铁甲无敌时光穿梭轮
22
00:02:26,878 --> 00:02:28,776
皇上，佛祖显灵啊
23
00:02:30,845 --> 00:02:35,141
万岁万岁万万岁
24
00:02:35,711 --> 00:02:38,939
真龙天子临天下
25
00:02:39,478 --> 00:02:42,876
凤舞蓝天未归来
26
00:02:43,311 --> 00:02:46,334
若求无双龙凤配
27
00:02:46,611 --> 00:02:50,135
不在古时不在今
28
00:02:50,778 --> 00:02:55,472
不在古时不在今？这是什么意思呢？
29
00:02:55,744 --> 00:02:58,574
皇上请放心！我们可以利用
30
00:02:58,811 --> 00:03:02,538
吴三桂和罗刹人发明的穿梭轮
31
00:03:02,845 --> 00:03:04,868
到三百年后的地方
32
00:03:05,145 --> 00:03:09,237
去找真命皇后回来替皇上治病
33
00:03:09,511 --> 00:03:11,068
派那一个去办呢？
34
00:03:14,078 --> 00:03:17,441
有了，我记得皇上有一个好朋友
35
00:03:17,578 --> 00:03:21,806
他好色淫贱古惑多变，但福大命大
36
00:03:22,045 --> 00:03:24,102
他就是最佳的人选啊
37
00:03:36,245 --> 00:03:38,143
今天晚上的手风一定要顺啊
38
00:03:38,511 --> 00:03:40,534
千万不要是公主！不要是公主
39
00:03:42,911 --> 00:03:44,308
今天晚上一定是你
40
00:03:45,978 --> 00:03:48,001
曾柔…曾柔
41
00:03:48,278 --> 00:03:50,267
千万不要是公主啊
42
00:03:51,911 --> 00:03:54,308
如果是公主我就杀了你
43
00:03:54,878 --> 00:03:59,333
曾柔…曾柔
44
00:04:01,278 --> 00:04:04,300
今天晚上是公主夫人伺候韦爵爷
45
00:04:04,578 --> 00:04:06,476
怎会这样啊？
46
00:04:06,778 --> 00:04:07,937
明明是曾柔的啊
47
00:04:08,744 --> 00:04:10,267
今天晚上我吃定你了
48
00:04:16,011 --> 00:04:18,340
这次糟糕了！死定了
49
00:04:18,578 --> 00:04:19,578
看紧门口吧
50
00:04:22,911 --> 00:04:25,536
韦爵爷不在里面啊
51
00:04:25,811 --> 00:04:29,504
不要硬闯进来嘛
52
00:04:34,112 --> 00:04:36,543
不要这样！别催促我
53
00:04:36,845 --> 00:04:37,868
我还没穿好衣服啊
54
00:04:38,078 --> 00:04:39,475
你两个真是没用
55
00:04:39,678 --> 00:04:41,507
你拉我也没用，我的衣服很重的
56
00:04:41,744 --> 00:04:43,210
我是走得这么慢的！那又怎么样啊？
57
00:04:43,478 --> 00:04:44,876
我说过进去就会进去
58
00:04:50,811 --> 00:04:52,333
公主
59
00:04:52,611 --> 00:04:54,474
你穿成这样究竟是什么意思呢？
60
00:04:54,778 --> 00:04:57,210
没什么！因为要来见你
61
00:04:57,511 --> 00:04:59,068
所以穿得隆重一点
62
00:05:00,311 --> 00:05:02,244
干嘛不将盾牌也带来呢？
63
00:05:02,411 --> 00:05:05,377
是啊！你提醒了我
64
00:05:06,978 --> 00:05:08,967
看什么？这是闺房之乐
65
00:05:09,245 --> 00:05:10,040
你们长大了之后就自然会懂了
66
00:05:10,245 --> 00:05:10,903
出去…出去
67
00:05:11,145 --> 00:05:12,145
立刻上床
68
00:05:12,611 --> 00:05:13,611
自己去
69
00:05:16,911 --> 00:05:17,911
我帮你
70
00:05:20,145 --> 00:05:20,769
老婆
71
00:05:21,112 --> 00:05:22,577
先说清楚今天晚上我们搞什么花招？
72
00:05:22,845 --> 00:05:23,845
我一定会照顾你的
73
00:05:24,045 --> 00:05:25,806
你真的照顾我才好
74
00:05:26,711 --> 00:05:27,711
什么东西刺我？
75
00:05:29,845 --> 00:05:32,834
狼牙棒？很易会弄出人命啊，老婆
76
00:05:33,011 --> 00:05:34,738
你是我老公，我不跟你弄出人命
77
00:05:35,011 --> 00:05:36,704
还会跟谁去弄人命呢？
78
00:05:44,011 --> 00:05:45,408
公主
79
00:05:45,644 --> 00:05:48,202
韦爷，圣旨到
80
00:05:49,478 --> 00:05:52,138
韦爷有性事在身
81
00:05:52,377 --> 00:05:55,366
不能下床接旨也不相干
82
00:05:56,377 --> 00:05:58,502
奉天承运，皇帝诏曰
83
00:05:58,711 --> 00:06:01,541
传韦小宝火速入宫面圣，钦Al
84
00:06:02,045 --> 00:06:03,102
老婆，我也没有其他办法
85
00:06:03,344 --> 00:06:04,935
皇上传我入宫，我说什么也要去
86
00:06:05,178 --> 00:06:07,609
谢主龙恩才行，是吗？
87
00:06:07,845 --> 00:06:09,175
阿福，备轿
88
00:06:09,578 --> 00:06:11,737
等一等，先完事才去吧
89
00:06:13,878 --> 00:06:16,935
国家兴亡男子有责
90
00:06:17,145 --> 00:06:20,440
朝廷养我千日，可能就是用于今朝
91
00:06:20,678 --> 00:06:23,201
我们的儿女私情，暂时放在一边吧
92
00:06:23,544 --> 00:06:24,737
先完事嘛
93
00:06:25,278 --> 00:06:26,278
先入宫嘛
94
00:06:26,444 --> 00:06:27,103
先完事嘛
95
00:06:27,377 --> 00:06:28,570
先入宫嘛
96
00:06:28,878 --> 00:06:29,969
边做，一边去吧
97
00:06:34,778 --> 00:06:35,244
好的…好的
98
00:06:35,278 --> 00:06:36,278
来吧
99
00:06:36,544 --> 00:06:41,806
高一点…高一点，用力点…用力点
100
00:06:42,112 --> 00:06:43,600
我已尽力了
101
00:06:57,511 --> 00:07:01,876
老公，我还未满足啊！我等你回来吧
102
00:07:05,311 --> 00:07:08,039
微臣轻佻浮燥情场女杀手玉树临风
103
00:07:08,278 --> 00:07:10,607
大富大贵一等鹿鼎公sir韦小宝
104
00:07:10,644 --> 00:07:12,439
叩见皇上
105
00:07:13,178 --> 00:07:14,178
平身
106
00:07:14,212 --> 00:07:15,212
谢皇上
107
00:07:17,578 --> 00:07:18,874
皇上召微臣进宫
108
00:07:19,178 --> 00:07:20,666
不知有什么重要事情呢？
109
00:07:20,945 --> 00:07:23,207
当然有要事嘛！过来过量一下吧
110
00:07:31,078 --> 00:07:36,204
皇上，你这种大蔴的味道似乎不佳啊
111
00:07:36,511 --> 00:07:38,670
要不要试试我这种暹逻货呢？
112
00:07:38,911 --> 00:07:40,207
好吧，让我试试看
113
00:07:40,611 --> 00:07:42,043
是陈太监给微臣的
114
00:07:44,045 --> 00:07:45,806
皇上，不要抽太多
115
00:07:47,911 --> 00:07:49,433
皇上，请保重龙体
116
00:07:49,845 --> 00:07:51,072
很厉害啊
117
00:07:51,411 --> 00:07:52,968
抽一口就会很兴奋了
118
00:07:53,978 --> 00:07:55,671
这里很闷，我们到外面走一走吧
119
00:07:55,711 --> 00:07:56,711
好的
120
00:08:01,377 --> 00:08:03,570
微臣一时兴奋走在皇上前面一点点
121
00:08:03,845 --> 00:08:04,435
请求皇上恕罪
122
00:08:04,744 --> 00:08:05,744
别说这种话
123
00:08:06,444 --> 00:08:08,842
去你的！最近有些事情令我心烦
124
00:08:09,112 --> 00:08:10,338
皇上头痛小宝心痛
125
00:08:10,611 --> 00:08:12,009
有什么事皇上尽管吩咐吧
126
00:08:12,212 --> 00:08:13,575
我韦小宝一定会尽力而为
127
00:08:14,778 --> 00:08:17,972
废话少说！我当你是我最好的朋友
128
00:08:18,178 --> 00:08:20,201
我现在有件艰难之极的难题
129
00:08:20,444 --> 00:08:22,274
要你帮我去处理
130
00:08:22,544 --> 00:08:23,567
你抚心自问
131
00:08:24,078 --> 00:08:28,170
如果当我是你的朋友你才好答应
132
00:08:28,778 --> 00:08:30,801
我当皇上何止是朋友呢
133
00:08:30,911 --> 00:08:31,934
我当皇上简直是神明一样来参拜
134
00:08:31,978 --> 00:08:33,035
当真？
135
00:08:35,644 --> 00:08:37,701
尤其是国难当前
136
00:08:38,078 --> 00:08:40,509
我韦小宝就算是上刀山，下油镬
137
00:08:40,778 --> 00:08:41,778
保证眼睛动也不动
138
00:08:41,978 --> 00:08:43,001
去你的
139
00:08:45,945 --> 00:08:48,070
这个混蛋，老是在套交情
140
00:08:48,278 --> 00:08:49,538
总是要我推辞不得
141
00:08:51,178 --> 00:08:53,041
我刚才所说的那件艰苦任务
142
00:08:53,212 --> 00:08:54,643
就是跟我们从罗杀国抢回来的
143
00:08:54,678 --> 00:08:56,576
时空穿梭轮有关
144
00:08:56,845 --> 00:08:58,504
那个就是穿梭轮了吗？
145
00:08:58,878 --> 00:09:01,276
颜色很耀眼啊！是金子做的吗？
146
00:09:01,945 --> 00:09:04,138
但它的外形活像个茶壶一样啊
147
00:09:04,411 --> 00:09:05,411
皇上
148
00:09:05,544 --> 00:09:06,805
不知这个穿梭轮有什么功用呢？
149
00:09:07,078 --> 00:09:08,338
皇上可否给我解释一下
150
00:09:08,711 --> 00:09:10,506
它能带你到三百年之后
151
00:09:13,369 --> 00:09:14,834
干嘛要带我到三百年之后呢
152
00:09:15,102 --> 00:09:16,102
找老婆啊
153
00:09:17,127 --> 00:09:19,491
微臣已经有七个了，用不着再找？
154
00:09:20,726 --> 00:09:22,715
最可惜的是我一个也没有啊
155
00:09:23,194 --> 00:09:25,819
说得对！那关我什么事呢
156
00:09:26,129 --> 00:09:30,084
小宝，上前听封
157
00:09:31,329 --> 00:09:32,989
微臣接旨
158
00:09:37,123 --> 00:09:38,588
怎么搞的
159
00:09:38,789 --> 00:09:40,255
敌人杀到吗？是不是敌人杀到？
160
00:09:45,189 --> 00:09:46,916
怎能坐呢
161
00:09:47,622 --> 00:09:50,611
皇上，茶壶变了碳啊
162
00:09:51,089 --> 00:09:52,089
启奏皇上
163
00:09:52,189 --> 00:09:54,552
刚才试验穿梭轮时发生爆炸
164
00:09:54,755 --> 00:09:56,278
穿梭轮已化为灰烬
165
00:09:56,555 --> 00:09:57,555
用不着你说我也看得到
166
00:09:57,789 --> 00:10:00,278
但愿皇上体谅我们已尽全力
167
00:10:00,655 --> 00:10:01,746
既然尽了力还是办不来
168
00:10:02,022 --> 00:10:03,022
不如就此作罢
169
00:10:03,489 --> 00:10:05,546
微臣希望带罪立功
170
00:10:05,689 --> 00:10:07,655
最后一个一定可以成功
171
00:10:07,889 --> 00:10:09,185
后天照原定计划出发
172
00:10:09,422 --> 00:10:10,422
尽管试一试吧
173
00:10:12,602 --> 00:10:16,796
试一试？皇上，最近我的赌运很差啊
174
00:10:18,602 --> 00:10:23,092
如果你不想去，那我自己去好吗？
175
00:10:25,635 --> 00:10:27,295
那一定要我去了
176
00:10:30,236 --> 00:10:34,600
师父，弟子今次离去之后
177
00:10:34,869 --> 00:10:36,233
不知还有没有命回来
178
00:10:45,069 --> 00:10:47,399
这次喂得你饱饱的
179
00:10:47,669 --> 00:10:49,329
你自己省着点来吃吧
180
00:10:49,535 --> 00:10:52,501
万望你保佑弟子完整的去
181
00:10:52,769 --> 00:10:56,531
完整的回来，拜托
182
00:11:00,202 --> 00:11:05,430
师父的面色很红润
183
00:11:05,602 --> 00:11:06,602
定是吃喝玩乐吧
184
00:11:06,769 --> 00:11:10,361
爵爷，时辰到了，玩轮盘好吗？
185
00:11:12,222 --> 00:11:14,279
不玩了！我今日心情欠佳
186
00:11:14,589 --> 00:11:15,612
要玩就叫他们来玩我吧
187
00:11:15,656 --> 00:11:17,485
是
188
00:11:24,689 --> 00:11:26,746
我还是先试一试口诀灵不灵验
189
00:11:27,489 --> 00:11:29,512
床前明月眼长疮
190
00:11:32,622 --> 00:11:33,849
怎么没有人呢？
191
00:11:34,722 --> 00:11:36,813
不是说好我一念口他就现身的吗？
192
00:11:39,789 --> 00:11:41,516
师父一定是上了茅厕
193
00:11:41,956 --> 00:11:44,751
小宝，你找师父什么事？
194
00:11:47,355 --> 00:11:48,480
师父
195
00:11:49,155 --> 00:11:50,280
没什么！
196
00:11:50,522 --> 00:11:52,613
我试一试那口诀有没有效而已
197
00:11:52,856 --> 00:11:54,378
去你的！无缘无故叫我来干什么啊？
198
00:11:54,656 --> 00:11:55,952
我操你祖宗十八代
199
00:11:56,188 --> 00:11:57,677
没事的话我走了
200
00:11:57,956 --> 00:11:59,387
师父，告辞了
201
00:12:02,455 --> 00:12:04,683
时代变了，连师父也说粗话
202
00:12:05,722 --> 00:12:09,518
七灯齐升
203
00:12:14,055 --> 00:12:15,988
小心点…慢慢来，就放在这儿吧
204
00:12:16,023 --> 00:12:19,546
老公，你怎么样？很辛苦吗？
205
00:12:19,923 --> 00:12:22,650
宫娥，快拿补品进来啊
206
00:12:22,889 --> 00:12:25,650
你别装蒜啊！怎会有事呢
207
00:12:25,856 --> 00:12:28,447
我说不会有事就不会有事啊
208
00:12:29,556 --> 00:12:31,954
老公，我这件东西给你
209
00:12:32,188 --> 00:12:33,620
玉乳房啊
210
00:12:33,923 --> 00:12:36,684
我要你记着我，不准你碰其他女人
211
00:12:36,956 --> 00:12:37,956
我自有打算
212
00:12:38,188 --> 00:12:39,620
姐姐，老公的身体这么差
213
00:12:39,889 --> 00:12:42,252
不如运功替他打通经脉吧
214
00:12:42,289 --> 00:12:43,050
好的
215
00:12:43,289 --> 00:12:44,289
扶起他吧
216
00:12:49,522 --> 00:12:52,215
你运你们的功，但千万别
217
00:12:59,989 --> 00:13:01,045
有多位夫人照顾
218
00:13:01,355 --> 00:13:03,048
韦爵爷一定不有事的
219
00:13:03,289 --> 00:13:05,255
希望韦爵爷可以大补元气
220
00:13:10,389 --> 00:13:12,855
禀告皇上，时辰已到
221
00:13:14,088 --> 00:13:17,316
韦爵爷，你只要朝着东北方向
222
00:13:17,355 --> 00:13:19,651
经纬十八度
223
00:13:19,989 --> 00:13:20,989
少噜嗦
224
00:13:21,289 --> 00:13:23,448
你还是说说怎样可以找皇后好了
225
00:13:23,856 --> 00:13:25,651
韦爵爷，佛祖显灵
226
00:13:25,856 --> 00:13:29,845
皇后是在庚子木年，三月初九
227
00:13:30,088 --> 00:13:32,179
寅时出生的童女
228
00:13:32,956 --> 00:13:35,547
童女？很难从外表分辨啊
229
00:13:35,989 --> 00:13:39,182
所以，我给你准备了枝水晶棒
230
00:13:39,622 --> 00:13:40,815
只要是处女
231
00:13:41,023 --> 00:13:44,045
碰到它的就会闪出耀的金光
232
00:13:44,589 --> 00:13:48,248
真的？那么淫妇又会怎么样
233
00:13:48,522 --> 00:13:51,044
淫妇就会发出耀眼的红光
234
00:13:54,155 --> 00:13:55,155
小宝
235
00:13:56,522 --> 00:13:59,852
我赐给你一柄上方宝剑和三箱珠宝
236
00:14:00,255 --> 00:14:02,881
你看着办吧
237
00:14:03,289 --> 00:14:04,289
谢皇上
238
00:14:04,422 --> 00:14:05,718
韦爵爷，请
239
00:14:16,622 --> 00:14:17,622
关门吧
240
00:14:17,889 --> 00:14:18,889
等一等
241
00:14:20,188 --> 00:14:23,848
皇上，你要记着答应过我的事
242
00:14:28,255 --> 00:14:29,346
关门吧
243
00:14:29,689 --> 00:14:31,154
等一等，我要尿尿
244
00:14:31,322 --> 00:14:32,322
关门吧
245
00:14:33,989 --> 00:14:36,012
起程
246
00:16:09,556 --> 00:16:12,545
难道这儿就是三百年后的世界？
247
00:16:13,923 --> 00:16:15,047
真香啊
248
00:16:18,289 --> 00:16:19,812
这个样子的，究竟是什么狗呢？
249
00:16:20,255 --> 00:16:21,255
别追我
250
00:16:22,088 --> 00:16:25,521
臭狗，滚开！滚开
251
00:16:31,856 --> 00:16:34,981
我怎会在这儿呢？难道是他救了我
252
00:16:35,322 --> 00:16:37,379
幸好看样子他不像是坏人
253
00:16:37,656 --> 00:16:39,246
大陆人，抬起双脚
254
00:16:41,322 --> 00:16:42,515
先吃了它吧
255
00:16:42,956 --> 00:16:44,546
全赖我从厕所救了你
256
00:16:44,822 --> 00:16:46,219
不然你已浸死了
257
00:16:48,622 --> 00:16:49,679
请问这儿是什么地方
258
00:16:49,923 --> 00:16:50,923
你又是什么人呢？
259
00:16:50,989 --> 00:16:53,546
什么地方？这里是皇家香港警察
260
00:16:53,822 --> 00:16:55,720
新界北区指挥总部
261
00:16:55,956 --> 00:16:58,615
不会管到的麻耶忽村派出所
262
00:16:58,856 --> 00:17:01,549
我是所长！官阶是沙展
263
00:17:01,956 --> 00:17:04,251
认识我的人都叫我华叔
264
00:17:04,489 --> 00:17:07,546
不识我的人就叫我警察或阿s
265
00:17:07,789 --> 00:17:10,186
亦即是你们所谓的公安
266
00:17:11,055 --> 00:17:13,385
你说得太快我不能完全领悟
267
00:17:13,656 --> 00:17:15,349
你可不可以将刚才所说的话再说一遍
268
00:17:15,389 --> 00:17:16,116
不必了
269
00:17:16,355 --> 00:17:17,753
你还是解释一下什么叫做警察吧
270
00:17:17,956 --> 00:17:20,888
警察就是维持治安的人嘛
271
00:17:21,822 --> 00:17:23,287
你别再在我面前装蒜啦
272
00:17:23,522 --> 00:17:25,181
我知你是从那边偷渡来的
273
00:17:25,589 --> 00:17:29,351
你快吃完这面后，我就带你回去吧
274
00:17:29,923 --> 00:17:32,855
回去？回去那里呀？
275
00:17:34,522 --> 00:17:36,215
请问当今皇帝是谁呀？
276
00:17:36,455 --> 00:17:37,546
我有事要跟他商量
277
00:17:38,122 --> 00:17:42,714
皇帝？那个就是皇帝了
278
00:17:44,122 --> 00:17:45,486
不男不女的外族
279
00:17:45,689 --> 00:17:46,780
现在岂不是没有了清朝
280
00:17:46,989 --> 00:17:48,887
清朝？神经病
281
00:17:49,088 --> 00:17:50,611
江湖第一大帮会是不是天地会呢？
282
00:17:50,822 --> 00:17:53,151
香港第一大帮会是马会
283
00:17:53,422 --> 00:17:54,581
马会？
284
00:17:55,422 --> 00:17:57,718
我岂不是要亲自去拜访一下马会
285
00:17:58,055 --> 00:18:00,487
有志气！可惜你没有身份证
286
00:18:00,656 --> 00:18:01,314
什么身份证？
287
00:18:01,622 --> 00:18:02,622
别噜嗦了
288
00:18:03,489 --> 00:18:06,148
还是趁阿超还没回来就快点带你回去
289
00:18:06,956 --> 00:18:09,683
阿超没有我这么容易商量
290
00:18:09,822 --> 00:18:11,879
他见到大陆人就会发晦气
291
00:18:12,222 --> 00:18:13,779
什么叫发晦气？
292
00:18:14,088 --> 00:18:15,452
看我的样子就知道了
293
00:18:17,522 --> 00:18:18,818
师父？
294
00:18:19,155 --> 00:18:21,246
师父！这次师叔也救不到你啦
295
00:18:21,455 --> 00:18:22,478
大陆人
296
00:18:22,889 --> 00:18:25,480
师父，你在这儿就好了
297
00:18:26,989 --> 00:18:29,682
这套不就是我梦寐以求的僵尸装吗？
298
00:18:29,989 --> 00:18:32,284
怎么我到玩具反斗城也买不到呢？
299
00:18:32,889 --> 00:18:37,480
说！告诉我
300
00:18:37,822 --> 00:18:38,822
师父，说什么呢？
301
00:18:38,856 --> 00:18:40,253
告诉我…告诉我
302
00:18:40,289 --> 00:18:43,153
阿超，你别太冲动啊
303
00:18:43,923 --> 00:18:45,081
你要我告诉你什么？
304
00:18:45,789 --> 00:18:47,016
你究竟说不说？
305
00:18:47,355 --> 00:18:48,480
我究竟要说什么呢？
306
00:18:48,789 --> 00:18:49,812
你要发问我才知你要我告诉你什么
307
00:18:50,088 --> 00:18:51,611
说！为何在玩具反斗城找不到
308
00:18:51,889 --> 00:18:54,616
这套梦寐以求的僵尸装呢
309
00:18:54,889 --> 00:18:57,014
我每天都是穿着这件衣服的
310
00:18:58,422 --> 00:19:00,786
师父，怎么你的辫子不见了
311
00:19:01,889 --> 00:19:02,889
“鞭”当然是在下面啊
312
00:19:03,055 --> 00:19:04,715
大陆人，你是不是当我的枪是假的？
313
00:19:04,956 --> 00:19:05,614
你从那儿偷渡来的？
314
00:19:05,822 --> 00:19:06,344
我说过我不是大陆人嘛
315
00:19:06,389 --> 00:19:08,582
说！立刻说！信不信我开枪打死你？
316
00:19:08,923 --> 00:19:10,252
我真的会开枪打死你！我不是说笑的
317
00:19:10,289 --> 00:19:13,687
阿超，你这样做会连累我啊
318
00:19:13,889 --> 00:19:15,684
其实在沙头角有什么不好呢？
319
00:19:15,923 --> 00:19:18,445
空气又清新工作又游闲
320
00:19:18,689 --> 00:19:21,519
你别老想着调到市区立功升职吧
321
00:19:22,155 --> 00:19:23,746
你再不听我的话
322
00:19:24,255 --> 00:19:25,721
我就在你面前自杀
323
00:19:25,889 --> 00:19:26,889
好啊！我帮你吧
324
00:19:28,255 --> 00:19:29,346
这样也打不中？
325
00:19:31,822 --> 00:19:33,617
华叔，怎么大清早就开始放鞭炮啦？
326
00:19:33,656 --> 00:19:34,656
不是放鞭炮
327
00:19:34,822 --> 00:19:36,845
我们在放屁，看谁的放得晌嘛？
328
00:19:37,155 --> 00:19:38,155
但所有东西都烂了
329
00:19:38,188 --> 00:19:39,245
没事没事
330
00:19:40,355 --> 00:19:41,616
还不去办手续？
331
00:19:44,789 --> 00:19:46,846
你们不要争，我先说吧
332
00:19:47,155 --> 00:19:49,348
你的事怎及我的严重呢？
333
00:19:55,322 --> 00:19:57,117
华叔，你听我说
334
00:19:57,355 --> 00:19:59,344
不要吵！慢慢说，一个跟着一个吧
335
00:19:59,389 --> 00:20:02,412
华叔，我要跟我老公离婚啊
336
00:20:03,155 --> 00:20:05,348
阿超，来帮帮忙嘛
337
00:20:06,656 --> 00:20:07,747
你千万不能怪我
338
00:20:07,956 --> 00:20:09,683
我打你也只是为了帮你
339
00:20:10,188 --> 00:20:12,848
陈近南，你到底是不是我师父？
340
00:20:13,088 --> 00:20:13,747
现在只有我们二人
341
00:20:14,023 --> 00:20:15,023
你不妨老实跟我说啊
342
00:20:15,055 --> 00:20:15,646
说什么？
343
00:20:15,856 --> 00:20:16,856
我是小宝呀
344
00:20:17,122 --> 00:20:18,486
你是小露宝，我是小吱喳
345
00:20:18,722 --> 00:20:20,551
钢铁老师叫我打你呀
346
00:20:21,556 --> 00:20:22,886
你的手没事吧？
347
00:20:23,589 --> 00:20:25,578
我告诉你，我这辈子最憎恨大陆人啦
348
00:20:25,889 --> 00:20:26,889
为什么我这么恨大陆人
349
00:20:27,122 --> 00:20:28,179
说起原因就是
350
00:20:28,422 --> 00:20:29,786
没有原因的！我喜欢打就打
351
00:20:30,088 --> 00:20:31,315
不知道在什么地方会有花姑娘呢？
352
00:20:31,989 --> 00:20:34,716
这边呀！你不跟着我走不是问题
353
00:20:34,989 --> 00:20:36,614
但我这辈子最讨厌的就是我说话时
354
00:20:36,989 --> 00:20:38,012
你却在我面前走来走去
355
00:20:41,255 --> 00:20:43,619
吱吱歪歪的！吵得我烦燥不安
356
00:20:44,856 --> 00:20:46,685
怎会只有这些老太婆啊？
357
00:20:46,956 --> 00:20:48,080
难道找错了地方？
358
00:20:53,656 --> 00:20:59,145
你这语无伦次的…你用什么来刺我？
359
00:20:59,489 --> 00:21:00,489
刚才说起什么呢？
360
00:21:00,656 --> 00:21:02,519
是了！我生平时讨厌就是长三角虱
361
00:21:02,756 --> 00:21:03,278
痒也不是问题
362
00:21:03,522 --> 00:21:04,818
最不吉利的就是要将毛剃光
363
00:21:05,088 --> 00:21:06,748
今天海水温度是廿五度
364
00:21:07,287 --> 00:21:10,253
吹清劲的东南风，时速十五海里
365
00:21:10,686 --> 00:21:11,743
准备好了没有？
366
00:21:13,254 --> 00:21:15,378
废话少说！我总算对你不错
367
00:21:15,653 --> 00:21:16,346
放你一条生路吧
368
00:21:16,653 --> 00:21:17,676
你好自为之吧
369
00:21:20,553 --> 00:21:21,814
这儿那有路呢？
370
00:21:22,087 --> 00:21:23,643
下面是海啊
371
00:21:23,920 --> 00:21:24,920
游泳回去吧
372
00:21:24,953 --> 00:21:25,543
我不懂游泳
373
00:21:25,787 --> 00:21:26,445
那就飘回去吧
374
00:21:26,653 --> 00:21:27,676
我也不懂飘啊
375
00:21:28,120 --> 00:21:29,676
我这么容易就被赂贿的吗
376
00:21:30,353 --> 00:21:31,546
这么容易就想打发我？
377
00:21:33,553 --> 00:21:34,746
再见了！大陆人
378
00:21:35,419 --> 00:21:39,909
华叔，你知道吗？我真的很寂寞啊
379
00:21:39,953 --> 00:21:41,249
别靠着我啊
380
00:21:41,486 --> 00:21:42,850
这里有很多人进进出出的
381
00:21:43,120 --> 00:21:44,847
我和老公的性生活不协调
382
00:21:45,087 --> 00:21:47,315
我想跟他离婚，以后就跟着你
383
00:21:47,920 --> 00:21:49,749
不打扰你们！我要睡一会儿
384
00:21:50,020 --> 00:21:50,747
贵利雄找你呀
385
00:21:50,953 --> 00:21:51,953
糟糕了
386
00:21:52,320 --> 00:21:54,115
喂…你老公在到处找你啊
387
00:21:54,287 --> 00:21:54,877
你知道吗？
388
00:21:55,120 --> 00:21:56,211
是吗？
389
00:21:56,620 --> 00:21:57,916
那我先走了，华叔拜拜
390
00:21:57,953 --> 00:22:01,181
拜拜
391
00:22:01,686 --> 00:22:02,947
老兄，我得到情报
392
00:22:03,187 --> 00:22:04,516
西贡船厂匿藏了些偷渡客
393
00:22:04,553 --> 00:22:06,110
我今天晚上一定要去将他们抓光
394
00:22:06,453 --> 00:22:07,453
你立刻打电话给你老大
395
00:22:07,553 --> 00:22:08,780
叫他多派数名兄弟来协助我
396
00:22:08,820 --> 00:22:09,820
我一定会立大功的
397
00:22:10,087 --> 00:22:11,280
那里来些兄弟呢？
398
00:22:11,686 --> 00:22:13,811
牛可能还有商量，它们就在村口
399
00:22:13,853 --> 00:22:14,853
去你的
400
00:22:14,887 --> 00:22:18,876
阿超，你的情报全部都是假的
401
00:22:19,120 --> 00:22:20,120
如果你真的要立功
402
00:22:20,287 --> 00:22:21,684
就先替我料理这些档案吧
403
00:22:21,720 --> 00:22:22,720
去！
404
00:22:22,953 --> 00:22:25,510
阿超，这些档案是关于你的
405
00:22:25,720 --> 00:22:28,312
全部都是投诉你欠不还的
406
00:22:28,353 --> 00:22:29,353
去！
407
00:22:29,386 --> 00:22:29,943
阿超
408
00:22:29,987 --> 00:22:31,680
够了吧！你别再投诉我了
409
00:22:31,953 --> 00:22:33,078
真不知你怎么能当我的老大
410
00:22:33,353 --> 00:22:34,353
你又怎做我的手下呀？
411
00:22:34,586 --> 00:22:35,677
你去做你的妇女节目吧
412
00:22:35,920 --> 00:22:37,011
你去做你的爆牙苏吧
413
00:22:37,453 --> 00:22:39,817
老是这么好赌，真不知你怎么打算
414
00:22:40,353 --> 00:22:42,615
华叔，我想跟你去看戏呀
415
00:22:42,987 --> 00:22:44,112
票子都已经买了
416
00:22:44,386 --> 00:22:46,216
今天晚上七点在戏院门外见吧
417
00:22:50,120 --> 00:22:52,449
天生我这么俊俏真是拿他没法啊
418
00:23:13,154 --> 00:23:14,847
原来是基哥和水哥两位
419
00:23:15,120 --> 00:23:16,949
真对不起，情报错误了
420
00:23:17,187 --> 00:23:21,642
我找错了地方，真是打扰了
421
00:23:22,953 --> 00:23:24,646
还不请超哥上来？
422
00:23:25,053 --> 00:23:25,575
财哥
423
00:23:25,887 --> 00:23:27,876
最近很少见你到欢乐天地消遣啊
424
00:23:30,287 --> 00:23:32,912
我现在代表油尖旺三区的七个赌档
425
00:23:32,953 --> 00:23:35,919
九个妓寨，来跟你算账
426
00:23:36,187 --> 00:23:37,482
共是十五万
427
00:23:37,820 --> 00:23:39,945
没钱还的话就留下你的器官吧
428
00:23:40,220 --> 00:23:41,879
怎么说我是皇家香港警察
429
00:23:42,087 --> 00:23:43,950
最有前途新人和飞虎队型像设计
430
00:23:44,154 --> 00:23:45,154
给我卖个面子吧
431
00:23:45,320 --> 00:23:46,478
我给你妈卖面子
432
00:23:46,686 --> 00:23:47,777
我老妈也想问候你
433
00:23:49,853 --> 00:23:50,944
你别逼我
434
00:23:55,020 --> 00:23:58,282
这块冒牌货你是从那里骗来的？
435
00:23:58,586 --> 00:24:01,552
财哥，我不是耍你
436
00:24:01,820 --> 00:24:03,218
我任何东西你都可以取去
437
00:24:03,453 --> 00:24:05,749
唯独这件值四百多万人见人爱的
438
00:24:05,787 --> 00:24:08,219
家传之宝你万万不能取去
439
00:24:10,753 --> 00:24:12,151
玉在人在，玉亡人亡
440
00:24:12,353 --> 00:24:12,978
你要是取走的话
441
00:24:13,254 --> 00:24:14,446
怎么也要给我一些现金
442
00:24:14,753 --> 00:24:15,446
你不说出来
443
00:24:15,753 --> 00:24:17,651
我还不知这块玉对你这么重要
444
00:24:18,686 --> 00:24:20,584
玉亡人亡，是吗？
445
00:24:20,720 --> 00:24:21,743
那你去死吧
446
00:24:25,120 --> 00:24:26,847
很痛呀
447
00:24:31,386 --> 00:24:33,443
谁个用东西掷我？很痛呀
448
00:24:34,220 --> 00:24:35,378
是那个混蛋掷的
449
00:24:36,187 --> 00:24:37,948
雄哥，就是这混蛋了
450
00:24:38,686 --> 00:24:40,379
真对不起呀，雄哥
451
00:24:40,787 --> 00:24:41,787
雄哥，雄嫂
452
00:24:41,987 --> 00:24:43,044
雄嫂
453
00:24:44,920 --> 00:24:45,715
十万元吧
454
00:24:45,920 --> 00:24:46,578
十万元？
455
00:24:46,820 --> 00:24:48,376
我说十万元就是十万元
456
00:24:48,620 --> 00:24:49,245
用不着这么多吧？
457
00:24:49,520 --> 00:24:50,145
嫂子擦伤了一点点而已
458
00:24:50,419 --> 00:24:51,419
十万元隆胸也够啊
459
00:24:51,787 --> 00:24:53,310
是我给你钱呀
460
00:24:54,486 --> 00:24:57,748
你给我？这块玉不只值十万元啊
461
00:24:57,987 --> 00:24:58,987
财哥你是识货之人
462
00:24:59,220 --> 00:25:00,220
你叫雄哥加一点吧
463
00:25:00,254 --> 00:25:01,480
有钱给你还这么噜嗦？
464
00:25:01,686 --> 00:25:03,209
雄哥说多少就多少嘛
465
00:25:03,254 --> 00:25:04,480
那就一言为定吧
466
00:25:05,486 --> 00:25:07,577
多谢雄哥，怎么只有五万元
467
00:25:07,987 --> 00:25:09,418
我老婆的医药费你不用付吗？
468
00:25:09,520 --> 00:25:11,146
公道！真够公道
469
00:25:11,320 --> 00:25:12,410
认他做老大可没有吃亏啊
470
00:25:12,620 --> 00:25:13,813
江湖上已经很难再找得到啊
471
00:25:13,853 --> 00:25:15,114
你们要听教听话
472
00:25:15,154 --> 00:25:16,154
财哥
473
00:25:16,720 --> 00:25:17,720
闭嘴
474
00:25:17,920 --> 00:25:18,920
别再耍我啦，财哥
475
00:25:19,020 --> 00:25:20,020
这东西还给你
476
00:25:20,586 --> 00:25:22,381
雄哥，这是利息啊
477
00:25:23,686 --> 00:25:25,413
将来有什么古董，就立刻拿来给我
478
00:25:25,653 --> 00:25:26,176
不用等将来
479
00:25:26,419 --> 00:25:27,544
我立刻回家将我的婆婆拿来给你
480
00:25:27,820 --> 00:25:28,820
再见啦各位老大
481
00:25:33,953 --> 00:25:36,544
居然冒充我师父将我推下海
482
00:25:38,686 --> 00:25:40,312
幸亏海浪将我带回岸
483
00:25:40,820 --> 00:25:41,615
若果让我再碰到那瘦皮猴
484
00:25:41,653 --> 00:25:42,846
我一定会教他好看
485
00:25:47,187 --> 00:25:48,210
不在这儿？
486
00:25:54,887 --> 00:25:55,887
有人
487
00:26:08,254 --> 00:26:09,311
幸亏她看不到我
488
00:26:13,254 --> 00:26:14,685
让我看看那瘦皮猴在不在这儿
489
00:26:20,453 --> 00:26:21,544
很大啊
490
00:26:33,753 --> 00:26:34,980
脱衣服？
491
00:26:37,453 --> 00:26:38,453
裤子也脱了
492
00:26:42,920 --> 00:26:43,920
洗澡？
493
00:26:57,120 --> 00:26:58,517
好棒
494
00:27:04,386 --> 00:27:05,875
精彩
495
00:27:11,787 --> 00:27:15,981
转过来
496
00:27:43,453 --> 00:27:49,511
有贼呀，有贼入村呀，来人啊
497
00:27:49,953 --> 00:27:56,818
我卑鄙！我下流！我贱格
498
00:27:58,087 --> 00:28:02,678
我不会介意大家憎恨我，毒打我
499
00:28:03,419 --> 00:28:07,681
污辱我，阉割我
500
00:28:09,087 --> 00:28:12,450
甚至…轮奸我
501
00:28:12,653 --> 00:28:15,881
老兄，你大话西游嘛？
502
00:28:16,586 --> 00:28:18,109
你先放了我们吧
503
00:28:18,353 --> 00:28:19,944
你说怎样就怎么样好了
504
00:28:20,586 --> 00:28:22,314
你在说反话吗？
505
00:28:24,620 --> 00:28:28,109
我知我就算死也弥补不了
506
00:28:30,653 --> 00:28:32,051
真的很棒啊
507
00:28:32,753 --> 00:28:34,719
很白…很滑
508
00:28:35,853 --> 00:28:36,876
也弥补不了
509
00:28:37,486 --> 00:28:40,884
这位身材这么出众的姑娘的创伤
510
00:28:42,453 --> 00:28:44,079
所以我决定
511
00:28:47,419 --> 00:28:49,079
离开这个伤心地
512
00:28:50,520 --> 00:28:51,577
你且先别走
513
00:28:51,887 --> 00:28:53,682
就算走也要先放了我们才走啊
514
00:28:53,987 --> 00:28:55,953
回来啊…放了我们啊
515
00:28:56,220 --> 00:28:57,220
但是在我走之前
516
00:28:57,820 --> 00:29:00,048
我要公开这条村一个天大的秘密
517
00:29:00,220 --> 00:29:02,243
什么？我跟我老公离婚
518
00:29:02,520 --> 00:29:04,146
无非是想得到华叔而已
519
00:29:04,820 --> 00:29:05,979
不错！我是去过隆胸
520
00:29:06,254 --> 00:29:08,015
但这是十多年前的事啊
521
00:29:09,053 --> 00:29:13,917
静一静
522
00:29:15,453 --> 00:29:16,680
不要吵
523
00:29:18,120 --> 00:29:20,143
秘密就是这条村有一个
524
00:29:21,220 --> 00:29:22,583
宝藏
525
00:29:22,953 --> 00:29:23,884
真的？说来听听吧
526
00:29:23,920 --> 00:29:25,818
搞什么？这种谎话都相信
527
00:29:26,386 --> 00:29:30,443
宝藏就在这个山头周围附近
528
00:29:30,720 --> 00:29:31,913
你们自己发掘嘛
529
00:29:32,586 --> 00:29:34,109
要不要我掘了它出来再将它包装好
530
00:29:34,154 --> 00:29:35,154
然后送到你家呢？
531
00:29:35,187 --> 00:29:36,914
自己掘嘛！神经病
532
00:29:36,953 --> 00:29:38,112
分散呀
533
00:29:57,254 --> 00:29:58,549
珠宝呀
534
00:29:59,220 --> 00:30:00,480
珠宝？
535
00:30:01,087 --> 00:30:03,746
我老爸的儿子发财啦
536
00:30:04,087 --> 00:30:10,508
是真的！真的有宝藏呀！发财啊
537
00:30:10,620 --> 00:30:12,143
难道你以为我是卖鱼丸的小贩吗？
538
00:30:12,920 --> 00:30:14,647
分头去掘吧
539
00:30:14,953 --> 00:30:15,953
我们继续去掘吧
540
00:30:16,154 --> 00:30:18,585
快去吧…快去吧
541
00:30:21,987 --> 00:30:28,510
宝爷…宝爷
542
00:30:28,720 --> 00:30:29,344
超哥
543
00:30:29,386 --> 00:30:30,114
宝爷
544
00:30:30,353 --> 00:30:32,512
超哥，太早睡不着吗？
545
00:30:32,553 --> 00:30:35,417
宝爷…宝爷
546
00:30:35,653 --> 00:30:36,710
让条生路给我走是吗？
547
00:30:37,254 --> 00:30:38,344
推我下海是吗？
548
00:30:38,386 --> 00:30:40,682
宝爷…宝爷
549
00:30:42,453 --> 00:30:44,215
转身一百八十度旋风霹雳穿心腿
550
00:30:44,254 --> 00:30:46,446
不要嘛！宝爷
551
00:30:46,486 --> 00:30:47,077
阿超什么事啊？
552
00:30:47,120 --> 00:30:48,120
阿超丢了下海呀
553
00:30:48,320 --> 00:30:49,047
还以为我出掌？
554
00:30:49,287 --> 00:30:51,116
不要吵！阿超下海去找宝藏
555
00:30:51,386 --> 00:30:52,386
你们继续掘吧
556
00:30:54,686 --> 00:30:56,084
最恨别人从我背后推我下海
557
00:30:56,753 --> 00:30:57,878
看你这个德性
558
00:30:58,053 --> 00:30:59,916
全身湿透啊！冷得你在发抖
559
00:31:00,753 --> 00:31:02,742
你先将身体抹干吧
560
00:31:02,987 --> 00:31:03,987
谢谢
561
00:31:05,953 --> 00:31:09,078
宝哥，你面颊上有粒尘啊
562
00:31:09,586 --> 00:31:10,950
我已替你抹了
563
00:31:12,386 --> 00:31:15,443
宝哥，不知还有没有其他宝藏呢？
564
00:31:15,486 --> 00:31:16,486
你很穷吗？
565
00:31:16,853 --> 00:31:18,751
不是！我随便说说而已
566
00:31:19,053 --> 00:31:21,076
我去替你洗内裤吧
567
00:31:26,320 --> 00:31:29,342
宝爷…宝爷，阳春面好吃吗
568
00:31:30,453 --> 00:31:31,453
你是中国人
569
00:31:31,486 --> 00:31:33,009
我也是中国人，大家都是中国人
570
00:31:33,254 --> 00:31:34,254
迟些更可能是一家人
571
00:31:34,486 --> 00:31:35,747
我们先做个好朋友嘛
572
00:31:36,053 --> 00:31:37,314
大家都是大陆人啊
573
00:31:37,620 --> 00:31:38,813
你才是大陆人！我是中国人
574
00:31:39,653 --> 00:31:40,949
大陆人，中国人
575
00:31:41,287 --> 00:31:42,650
大家都是上等人嘛
576
00:31:43,353 --> 00:31:46,013
刚才你借给我们开眼界的那粒玉
577
00:31:46,320 --> 00:31:48,047
原来那玉很有来头
578
00:31:48,320 --> 00:31:48,978
我有位朋友一看见之后
579
00:31:49,287 --> 00:31:50,287
就立刻出价十万元
580
00:31:50,453 --> 00:31:51,453
看你的样子也知你很听教听话
581
00:31:51,653 --> 00:31:52,312
我收你做小弟吧
582
00:31:52,520 --> 00:31:53,520
好啊！多谢宝爷
583
00:31:53,987 --> 00:31:55,919
那我有什么甜头呢？
584
00:31:57,987 --> 00:31:59,180
真阔气啊
585
00:31:59,453 --> 00:32:00,476
不过你要答应我三个条件
586
00:32:00,686 --> 00:32:01,686
好的！没问题
587
00:32:01,920 --> 00:32:05,352
日后，你吃我的住我的，但我吃定你
588
00:32:05,386 --> 00:32:06,716
好的！没问题
589
00:32:06,987 --> 00:32:07,987
第二呢？
590
00:32:08,720 --> 00:32:10,084
第二，你要帮我找个处女
591
00:32:10,320 --> 00:32:12,945
处女比较难找啊，不过我会尽力而为
592
00:32:13,320 --> 00:32:14,444
处男却有一个，适不适合呢
593
00:32:14,486 --> 00:32:15,486
第三…
594
00:32:15,753 --> 00:32:17,219
第三，没问题没问题
595
00:32:17,453 --> 00:32:18,544
第三就是你不要这么烦呀
596
00:32:19,533 --> 00:32:20,533
好的
597
00:32:21,600 --> 00:32:22,065
喂！
598
00:32:22,333 --> 00:32:22,958
喂！
599
00:32:23,233 --> 00:32:23,927
你在那里呀？
600
00:32:24,199 --> 00:32:25,199
我在这儿啊！宝爷
601
00:32:26,166 --> 00:32:27,655
现今的女子最喜欢的是什么呢？
602
00:32:27,680 --> 00:32:29,646
钱！要不就是花
603
00:32:30,552 --> 00:32:32,108
要不要我替你松一松颈骨？宝爷
604
00:32:32,600 --> 00:32:34,498
好的！什么是松颈骨呀？
605
00:32:41,015 --> 00:32:44,879
花香…鸟语
606
00:32:45,115 --> 00:32:46,115
小姐早晨
607
00:32:46,281 --> 00:32:46,906
原来是你
608
00:32:47,149 --> 00:32:48,614
是啊
609
00:32:49,215 --> 00:32:49,874
你来干嘛？
610
00:32:50,182 --> 00:32:51,340
我想跟你交个朋友
611
00:32:51,848 --> 00:32:53,279
你快走啊，衰相
612
00:32:57,815 --> 00:32:59,474
银票
613
00:33:00,182 --> 00:33:01,408
走啊
614
00:33:01,815 --> 00:33:04,542
你要我走？你跟钱作对吗
615
00:33:04,882 --> 00:33:05,882
短路
616
00:33:09,215 --> 00:33:11,704
短路是什么意思呢？
617
00:33:14,949 --> 00:33:17,608
死狗超，干嘛随处撒尿？
618
00:33:17,882 --> 00:33:18,882
难道在此拉屎吗？
619
00:33:19,149 --> 00:33:21,444
宝爷，干嘛不跟我说话啊？
620
00:33:21,748 --> 00:33:23,475
干嘛大清早就玄坛般的嘴脸呢？
621
00:33:23,515 --> 00:33:24,674
走错路啊
622
00:33:25,149 --> 00:33:26,842
我今天替你安排了精彩的节目
623
00:33:27,082 --> 00:33:28,082
我们先去吃回转寿司
624
00:33:28,281 --> 00:33:30,543
再去打电动，然后去溜水
625
00:33:33,381 --> 00:33:34,075
师父
626
00:33:34,348 --> 00:33:35,939
不用太讲究，随便替他料理一下
627
00:33:36,281 --> 00:33:37,179
总之像个人的模样就是了
628
00:33:37,215 --> 00:33:38,215
好呀
629
00:33:38,949 --> 00:33:40,346
你干嘛？不能剪啊
630
00:33:40,682 --> 00:33:41,773
大清律例留发不留头
631
00:33:41,815 --> 00:33:43,042
如果被你剪了还了得？
632
00:33:43,281 --> 00:33:44,679
不要留啊！剪掉它吧
633
00:33:46,215 --> 00:33:48,045
警告过你还要剪，去死吧
634
00:33:49,215 --> 00:33:52,080
警告了你还要剪？结辫子好吗？宝:l
635
00:33:52,115 --> 00:33:53,705
好的
636
00:33:54,015 --> 00:33:55,015
只替他结辫子
637
00:33:55,315 --> 00:33:58,543
这儿就是香港最兴旺的地方尖沙嘴
638
00:33:58,782 --> 00:34:00,441
这里有特别多的购物中心
639
00:34:00,682 --> 00:34:02,580
特别多的行人，特别多斑马线
640
00:34:02,815 --> 00:34:04,610
特别多出租车，特别多警察
641
00:34:04,848 --> 00:34:07,007
特别多珠宝店，特别多电灯杆
642
00:34:07,281 --> 00:34:08,281
特别多栏杆
643
00:34:08,748 --> 00:34:10,304
再过一点点的尖东海傍
644
00:34:10,481 --> 00:34:12,845
不分昼夜总有很多人在顶嘴
645
00:34:14,782 --> 00:34:15,406
不分昼夜总有很多人在顶嘴
646
00:34:15,748 --> 00:34:16,748
接吻啊
647
00:34:16,848 --> 00:34:17,438
用不用花钱的？
648
00:34:17,682 --> 00:34:18,682
不用的话我们去试一试吧
649
00:34:18,848 --> 00:34:19,848
有些要付钱有的却不需要
650
00:34:20,548 --> 00:34:22,309
皇后不是一时三刻间就可以找得到
651
00:34:22,348 --> 00:34:23,974
在找到她之前你就住在我这里吧
652
00:34:24,281 --> 00:34:25,941
齐衣食住行全由你负担
653
00:34:26,182 --> 00:34:28,114
我是没有问题，我们是两兄弟嘛
654
00:34:28,949 --> 00:34:30,744
你家原来这么简陋
655
00:34:31,582 --> 00:34:32,878
没有人服侍我，我是睡不着的
656
00:34:33,082 --> 00:34:34,274
找寻皇后是要车马费的
657
00:34:34,515 --> 00:34:36,504
这块烂东西也值三两百元
658
00:34:36,782 --> 00:34:37,805
快些脚下来给我吧
659
00:34:41,348 --> 00:34:42,348
那就交给你吧
660
00:34:42,448 --> 00:34:43,641
出租车费十分昂费
661
00:34:43,882 --> 00:34:45,109
我想到九龙去找一找
662
00:34:45,415 --> 00:34:47,278
脱下来…脱下来吧
663
00:34:48,415 --> 00:34:49,438
全给你了
664
00:34:49,949 --> 00:34:52,040
行了！去深圳也行了
665
00:34:53,548 --> 00:34:54,548
劳烦你了
666
00:35:01,348 --> 00:35:02,371
真低能
667
00:35:03,715 --> 00:35:05,237
听说香港出租车是由九元开始算的
668
00:35:10,049 --> 00:35:11,049
真的假的
669
00:35:11,182 --> 00:35:12,272
真的
670
00:35:15,049 --> 00:35:17,038
这么高跌下一点儿也没有受伤？
671
00:35:17,481 --> 00:35:18,947
老兄，不要充英雄啊
672
00:35:20,082 --> 00:35:21,513
今天有什么好货色？
673
00:35:21,882 --> 00:35:23,438
没什么！普通货色而已
674
00:35:23,715 --> 00:35:25,908
明末清初，长平公主的胆石而已
675
00:35:26,182 --> 00:35:27,272
我替你量一量吧
676
00:35:27,515 --> 00:35:29,413
你这混蛋！又用曲尺来骗我？
677
00:35:29,648 --> 00:35:30,648
随便吧！数目对了
678
00:35:30,915 --> 00:35:32,881
明天我拿康熙的包皮来押
679
00:35:35,815 --> 00:35:38,303
行了！庆祝一下吧
680
00:35:43,348 --> 00:35:44,644
大眼鸡
681
00:35:44,982 --> 00:35:45,982
进来吧
682
00:35:48,682 --> 00:35:51,012
你要找的那个皇后我正替你找了
683
00:35:51,248 --> 00:35:53,407
你要喝的热柠檬水，我也买了给你
684
00:35:53,682 --> 00:35:55,272
我要工作啊！你先放下来吧
685
00:35:55,548 --> 00:35:56,571
你真勤力
686
00:35:58,415 --> 00:35:59,642
这么丑！不会是她吧
687
00:36:01,215 --> 00:36:02,306
这个我在夜总会见过
688
00:36:02,548 --> 00:36:03,707
这科要学多久呢？
689
00:36:03,982 --> 00:36:05,039
约两三年吧
690
00:36:05,248 --> 00:36:06,248
两三年？
691
00:36:06,481 --> 00:36:07,481
滚开啊
692
00:36:09,882 --> 00:36:10,882
没问题
693
00:36:11,715 --> 00:36:13,408
真香啊！你用什么肥皂？
694
00:36:13,448 --> 00:36:14,448
不告诉你
695
00:36:14,648 --> 00:36:15,272
滴露？
696
00:36:15,481 --> 00:36:16,072
滴露？
697
00:36:16,248 --> 00:36:17,248
洁厕粉
698
00:36:17,381 --> 00:36:18,381
去死吧
699
00:36:19,915 --> 00:36:21,040
糟糕
700
00:36:22,915 --> 00:36:23,938
你害死我啦
701
00:36:24,149 --> 00:36:25,409
镇定点！坏了一部机而已
702
00:36:25,615 --> 00:36:26,638
我很快就会修理好
703
00:36:27,682 --> 00:36:28,773
全部都坏了
704
00:36:29,082 --> 00:36:30,513
我去找师父来
705
00:36:36,915 --> 00:36:38,972
去你的…去你的
706
00:36:39,015 --> 00:36:40,537
你真聪明，知道我闯了祸
707
00:36:40,782 --> 00:36:42,509
你叫我查的那件事快查到了
708
00:36:42,648 --> 00:36:43,648
真的吗？
709
00:36:43,815 --> 00:36:44,815
半年之内
710
00:36:44,982 --> 00:36:47,971
我保管有消息！手到拿来啊
711
00:36:48,182 --> 00:36:49,182
这算是人话吗？
712
00:36:49,481 --> 00:36:51,107
半年你也不能等吗？
713
00:36:51,481 --> 00:36:53,344
去你的
714
00:36:54,182 --> 00:36:56,545
今次真是去你的！还是走为上着
715
00:36:59,548 --> 00:37:00,548
下一位
716
00:37:03,748 --> 00:37:05,771
钟小姐是吗？麻烦你将手伸出来
717
00:37:05,882 --> 00:37:06,882
右手
718
00:37:07,882 --> 00:37:09,245
你不介意拿着我那话儿吧
719
00:37:09,481 --> 00:37:10,481
那话儿
720
00:37:10,582 --> 00:37:11,639
是这个
721
00:37:19,182 --> 00:37:19,840
谢谢
722
00:37:20,082 --> 00:37:21,308
淫贱
723
00:37:21,615 --> 00:37:22,638
可以走了
724
00:37:23,248 --> 00:37:25,441
我今天晚上找你啊，淫娃
725
00:37:25,648 --> 00:37:27,238
今天晚上我要上班啊，不如我找你吧
726
00:37:27,281 --> 00:37:28,281
好的
727
00:37:29,381 --> 00:37:30,381
好的
728
00:37:34,281 --> 00:37:36,440
黄小姐是吗？你拿着吧
729
00:37:39,949 --> 00:37:41,040
怎会是绿色的？
730
00:37:41,348 --> 00:37:42,371
不红不金，究竟什么意思
731
00:37:42,415 --> 00:37:43,415
行了
732
00:37:44,848 --> 00:37:47,643
请问你最近有没有被人占了便宜？
733
00:37:48,448 --> 00:37:51,414
没有！不过我最近有一次喝醉了
734
00:37:51,715 --> 00:37:53,340
觉醒来就连贞操也不见了
735
00:37:53,582 --> 00:37:54,775
到现在还没有寻回
736
00:37:55,648 --> 00:37:56,648
那你有没有报警？
737
00:37:56,748 --> 00:37:57,475
没有啊
738
00:37:57,715 --> 00:37:59,079
你岂不是已不是处女了吗
739
00:37:59,315 --> 00:38:00,838
神经病！那有这么多处女呢
740
00:38:01,115 --> 00:38:02,115
去幼稚园找吧
741
00:38:02,348 --> 00:38:03,507
你们真是神经病
742
00:38:03,815 --> 00:38:04,974
她说得对啊
743
00:38:06,748 --> 00:38:07,748
下一位
744
00:38:39,748 --> 00:38:40,839
对不起
745
00:38:41,082 --> 00:38:42,105
不用道歉
746
00:38:46,682 --> 00:38:48,443
档案呢？…档案呢？
747
00:38:48,648 --> 00:38:51,171
档案呢？快去找一找吧
748
00:38:53,848 --> 00:38:54,871
用不着这么硬啊？
749
00:38:55,082 --> 00:38:56,274
你也很硬啊
750
00:39:01,682 --> 00:39:03,148
档案啊！档案在那里呢
751
00:39:03,381 --> 00:39:05,244
先别找档案吧！先料理小弟啊
752
00:39:08,215 --> 00:39:09,943
把档案给我吧！看什么呢
753
00:39:12,248 --> 00:39:13,305
台怎么会翘起呢？
754
00:39:13,515 --> 00:39:14,606
美女是从泰国来的
755
00:39:14,815 --> 00:39:16,111
泰国的肉松也很美啊
756
00:39:16,348 --> 00:39:18,576
泰国的榴挞更漂亮呀
757
00:39:19,481 --> 00:39:20,640
是的
758
00:39:22,548 --> 00:39:23,548
阿超，我出去一会儿
759
00:39:23,748 --> 00:39:25,941
宝爷…宝爷呀
760
00:39:27,381 --> 00:39:28,485
是不是有东西给我把玩？
761
00:39:28,510 --> 00:39:29,510
是啊
762
00:39:31,587 --> 00:39:34,417
小姐，我跟你真是有缘啊
763
00:39:34,853 --> 00:39:36,183
我们经常都碰见
764
00:39:36,819 --> 00:39:37,842
你准备去那儿呀？
765
00:39:40,053 --> 00:39:41,519
真香啊！你刚洗澡吗？
766
00:39:41,720 --> 00:39:42,720
你是用那种肥皂的？
767
00:39:42,819 --> 00:39:43,547
你还没有死吗？
768
00:39:43,754 --> 00:39:45,686
小霞，出城吗？
769
00:39:45,853 --> 00:39:46,853
是吗？
770
00:39:47,086 --> 00:39:49,950
死？不错！我每次见到你我就想死
771
00:39:50,253 --> 00:39:51,912
你真是口甜舌滑啊
772
00:39:52,353 --> 00:39:53,376
真的很滑啊
773
00:39:54,353 --> 00:39:56,581
你怎知我的口很甜呢？
774
00:39:57,553 --> 00:39:58,746
更感觉到滑吗？
775
00:39:59,120 --> 00:40:00,881
你去那里呀？载我一程吧
776
00:40:03,186 --> 00:40:04,277
你丢下了我？
777
00:40:04,853 --> 00:40:05,944
走得我要命
778
00:40:17,120 --> 00:40:18,484
你别跟着我吧
779
00:40:19,487 --> 00:40:20,487
我也不想跟着你
780
00:40:20,720 --> 00:40:21,878
但不知怎的我每次见到你时
781
00:40:22,153 --> 00:40:23,914
总是被你吸着似的
782
00:40:24,620 --> 00:40:26,313
我想，我对你产生了好感
783
00:40:27,186 --> 00:40:29,015
我对你不只没有好感
784
00:40:29,387 --> 00:40:30,580
而且更有反感啊
785
00:40:32,153 --> 00:40:33,346
这方面你可以放心
786
00:40:34,020 --> 00:40:36,077
我有信心令到你对我不单没有反感
787
00:40:36,320 --> 00:40:38,842
而且还会对我日久生情
788
00:40:39,353 --> 00:40:41,649
我不会跟你人狗生情的
789
00:40:42,320 --> 00:40:44,183
你干嘛无缘无故说自己是狗呢？
790
00:40:45,986 --> 00:40:47,009
那裤子很漂亮啊
791
00:40:49,986 --> 00:40:50,986
很香啊
792
00:40:51,220 --> 00:40:52,584
甜心呀，这个人是谁啊？
793
00:40:52,819 --> 00:40:54,944
这个就是我从前跟你提过的小霞啊
794
00:40:56,520 --> 00:40:58,042
原来是她
795
00:40:59,320 --> 00:41:01,979
你选我真算是英明的抉择啊
796
00:41:02,320 --> 00:41:03,445
你真可爱
797
00:41:04,919 --> 00:41:06,510
他就是你新男朋友吗？
798
00:41:07,186 --> 00:41:08,516
不是新男朋友
799
00:41:08,886 --> 00:41:10,546
是未来老公
800
00:41:13,587 --> 00:41:14,746
你找不到最好的
801
00:41:15,020 --> 00:41:17,043
也用不着找个最差的啊
802
00:41:17,819 --> 00:41:20,183
不是啊！很合衬啊
803
00:41:20,687 --> 00:41:21,687
说得对
804
00:41:21,720 --> 00:41:23,447
这位兄台，你别以为高我一点点
805
00:41:23,687 --> 00:41:25,482
就可以在公众场合侮辱我
806
00:41:25,720 --> 00:41:26,720
侮辱你又怎么样？
807
00:41:27,153 --> 00:41:29,585
兄台身边那位也不见得很出众啊
808
00:41:31,020 --> 00:41:32,281
她有口臭啊
809
00:41:32,553 --> 00:41:33,553
你说的是啊？
810
00:41:33,687 --> 00:41:34,687
我说你！三八
811
00:41:34,819 --> 00:41:35,410
有种的再说一遍
812
00:41:35,653 --> 00:41:36,744
你既然喜欢那我就再说一遍
813
00:41:37,053 --> 00:41:39,281
你不单只不出众，而且还有口臭
814
00:41:39,487 --> 00:41:40,510
你不单只不出众，而且还有口臭
815
00:41:41,520 --> 00:41:42,985
我们别再跟这种没文化的人说话
816
00:41:43,220 --> 00:41:44,447
我们到那边吧
817
00:41:45,253 --> 00:41:46,946
甜心，我们去楼上看衣服吧
818
00:41:47,153 --> 00:41:48,710
你去吧！我在这儿等你
819
00:41:53,886 --> 00:41:54,886
混蛋！
820
00:42:14,819 --> 00:42:16,615
怎么样？什么时间有空呢？
821
00:42:16,786 --> 00:42:17,786
我取你命
822
00:42:24,487 --> 00:42:29,146
甜心，我被人袭击呀
823
00:42:29,420 --> 00:42:33,750
甜心，没天理啊！打得你这么伤
824
00:42:34,420 --> 00:42:35,420
搞什么的？
825
00:42:35,520 --> 00:42:37,611
打得她这么严重！你有人性的吗？
826
00:42:37,853 --> 00:42:39,080
谁叫她看着我？
827
00:42:39,353 --> 00:42:41,615
你真是！竟然跟这种长发黑社会混
828
00:42:41,653 --> 00:42:42,948
还出手打人
829
00:42:43,220 --> 00:42:45,516
你早晚被他们卖到妓寨的
830
00:42:45,786 --> 00:42:47,979
你无耻！下流！贱格
831
00:42:48,186 --> 00:42:49,186
你干嘛打她呢？
832
00:42:49,520 --> 00:42:50,520
应该打他啊
833
00:42:52,520 --> 00:42:53,679
你连我也打？
834
00:42:53,986 --> 00:42:54,986
走吧！
835
00:42:55,420 --> 00:42:56,420
你干嘛拖着我的手？
836
00:42:56,520 --> 00:42:58,247
没什么！我很晕呀，你扶着我吧
837
00:42:58,754 --> 00:43:00,481
我一定要告你
838
00:43:02,452 --> 00:43:04,747
我们的一切从纽约开始
839
00:43:04,952 --> 00:43:05,952
洋鬼子的地方？
840
00:43:06,152 --> 00:43:07,209
是纽约戏院啊
841
00:43:07,952 --> 00:43:09,009
洋鬼子的戏院？
842
00:43:10,219 --> 00:43:14,481
我跟他去看戏，是一出爱情故事
843
00:43:14,952 --> 00:43:16,009
他说
844
00:43:16,252 --> 00:43:19,082
会像戏中男主角待女主角的一样待我
845
00:43:19,419 --> 00:43:22,408
至死不渝，永不分离
846
00:43:22,752 --> 00:43:27,151
兄台，这些是不是鱼呀？新鲜吗？
847
00:43:27,419 --> 00:43:28,419
当然新鲜啊
848
00:43:28,952 --> 00:43:30,179
给我清蒸吧
849
00:43:30,619 --> 00:43:32,585
给我切得薄一点，太厚了
850
00:43:34,152 --> 00:43:35,311
清蒸？
851
00:43:35,985 --> 00:43:37,281
什么？你太可怜啊
852
00:43:37,619 --> 00:43:40,346
这还不止啊！后来他找我
853
00:43:41,085 --> 00:43:42,574
说要跟我订婚
854
00:43:43,186 --> 00:43:44,152
怎知订婚前一晚才还未考虑清楚
855
00:43:44,186 --> 00:43:45,584
这是什么啊？
856
00:43:45,619 --> 00:43:46,811
拖罗
857
00:43:47,586 --> 00:43:48,983
放在水中灼一灼吧
858
00:43:49,252 --> 00:43:50,252
我不太喜欢吃生的
859
00:43:51,519 --> 00:43:52,644
神经病
860
00:43:53,186 --> 00:43:54,311
真过分啊
861
00:43:54,952 --> 00:43:57,544
是啊！他真是禽兽
862
00:43:57,885 --> 00:43:58,885
失陪了
863
00:44:06,286 --> 00:44:08,115
她的身世真是可怜
864
00:44:08,452 --> 00:44:09,815
但可怜也要上啊
865
00:44:11,752 --> 00:44:16,208
幸亏我随身携带着这半瓶“淫七日
866
00:44:18,186 --> 00:44:20,243
看你怎逃出我的手掌？
867
00:44:35,818 --> 00:44:40,807
反正都是淫，不如淫半个月吧
868
00:44:46,985 --> 00:44:48,542
先生，灼过的拖罗啊
869
00:44:48,586 --> 00:44:49,586
谢谢
870
00:44:49,952 --> 00:44:51,145
真的在这儿！你这混蛋
871
00:44:51,386 --> 00:44:52,010
我四处去帮你找皇后
872
00:44:52,286 --> 00:44:53,309
你竟然躲在这儿吃东西
873
00:44:53,519 --> 00:44:54,519
你白费了我的心血啊
874
00:44:54,586 --> 00:44:56,211
大不了我将心血还…不
875
00:44:56,252 --> 00:44:57,616
将钱还给你作补偿
876
00:44:58,019 --> 00:44:59,383
那好吧！给我吃一口
877
00:44:59,419 --> 00:45:00,544
不要吃
878
00:45:01,486 --> 00:45:02,577
小姐，你没事吧？
879
00:45:02,818 --> 00:45:06,910
原来你在泡妞！总算情有可原
880
00:45:07,219 --> 00:45:09,242
小霞，什么事？你不舒服吗？
881
00:45:10,619 --> 00:45:12,948
头晕吗？一定是想得太多了
882
00:45:13,186 --> 00:45:14,913
我扶你到那边休息一会吧
883
00:45:16,219 --> 00:45:18,082
你一定是伤心过度
884
00:45:19,752 --> 00:45:20,979
先喝点
885
00:45:22,852 --> 00:45:24,250
刚才有杯东西在此啊
886
00:45:31,818 --> 00:45:33,341
糟糕了
887
00:45:34,019 --> 00:45:36,008
你干嘛？喝了你的汽水而已
888
00:45:36,052 --> 00:45:40,007
没有了！总之是没有了
889
00:45:42,818 --> 00:45:43,841
你死定了
890
00:45:44,119 --> 00:45:46,108
我真的死定啊！又赚数十万啊
891
00:45:46,352 --> 00:45:47,545
你们先走吧，我来付账
892
00:45:47,752 --> 00:45:48,877
你必死无疑
893
00:45:49,752 --> 00:45:51,116
来个猪扒蛋饭
894
00:45:51,352 --> 00:45:52,977
要多猪扒，多蛋和多饭
895
00:45:53,186 --> 00:45:54,482
要两碟是吗？
896
00:45:54,752 --> 00:45:57,150
怎么样？到我家坐一会好吗
897
00:45:57,319 --> 00:45:58,478
太晚了！改天吧
898
00:45:58,685 --> 00:46:00,549
改天？霞妹
899
00:46:01,119 --> 00:46:04,381
其实我的遭遇跟你很相似
900
00:46:04,718 --> 00:46:06,309
所以我才会这么大胆向你
901
00:46:09,785 --> 00:46:11,251
糟糕了！你先回去吧
902
00:46:11,486 --> 00:46:12,486
我要去看看阿超
903
00:46:12,685 --> 00:46:13,878
你小心啊
904
00:46:14,952 --> 00:46:16,543
很想吻你的面颊
905
00:46:16,752 --> 00:46:21,242
味香滑如吃新鲜蛋挞
906
00:46:21,553 --> 00:46:23,143
我要呀
907
00:46:25,419 --> 00:46:26,510
阿超
908
00:46:26,535 --> 00:46:29,194
救命呀…
909
00:46:32,257 --> 00:46:34,882
别跑
910
00:46:35,724 --> 00:46:36,781
阿超，你干嘛？
911
00:46:37,224 --> 00:46:39,689
不要啊…我是男人啊
912
00:46:40,157 --> 00:46:47,079
阿超，不要啊…我给你找个姑娘吧
913
00:47:11,911 --> 00:47:13,968
救护车来了没有？
914
00:47:15,611 --> 00:47:18,736
我朋友快被人打死啊
915
00:47:20,784 --> 00:47:26,240
你打死我吧…再这样下去
916
00:47:26,284 --> 00:47:27,874
我宁愿不做人了
917
00:47:28,484 --> 00:47:30,507
你这个混蛋还说？闭嘴
918
00:47:31,384 --> 00:47:33,282
你竟用那东西插我屁股？
919
00:47:33,517 --> 00:47:34,710
你以为我故意的吗？
920
00:47:34,984 --> 00:47:35,984
你除了屁眼之外
921
00:47:36,017 --> 00:47:37,710
还有那地方有洞呢？
922
00:47:37,884 --> 00:47:38,884
去你的
923
00:47:44,118 --> 00:47:51,040
元振，这位是我从罗刹国请来的高手
924
00:47:52,084 --> 00:47:55,516
我有一个重要的任务
925
00:47:56,484 --> 00:47:58,144
就是派你们两个去
926
00:47:58,184 --> 00:48:01,809
百年后的地方追杀韦小宝
927
00:48:02,251 --> 00:48:06,546
这个任务，只许成功不许失败
928
00:48:06,717 --> 00:48:07,910
是
929
00:48:10,218 --> 00:48:12,446
我想清楚了，皇后是女人
930
00:48:12,650 --> 00:48:15,344
全香港最多女人的地方莫过于夜总会
931
00:48:15,617 --> 00:48:17,049
那就好了！你不要再骗我啊
932
00:48:17,284 --> 00:48:19,011
那里酒池肉林，肉体横陈
933
00:48:19,218 --> 00:48:21,013
稍一不留心，就会被乳浪臀花打啤
934
00:48:26,717 --> 00:48:29,240
宝爷，很疲倦吗？
935
00:48:29,684 --> 00:48:31,275
不是！我怕会吐啊
936
00:48:31,517 --> 00:48:32,517
说得对
937
00:48:32,817 --> 00:48:34,646
香港的美女不知到了那里去？
938
00:48:40,384 --> 00:48:42,407
宝爷…你怎么样？
939
00:48:42,984 --> 00:48:45,280
明白明白…知道了
940
00:48:45,517 --> 00:48:46,847
妈妈生
941
00:48:47,017 --> 00:48:49,574
什么事？老板，有什么吩咐？
942
00:48:50,517 --> 00:48:52,745
宝爷，你忍耐一点
943
00:48:52,917 --> 00:48:54,076
妈妈生，那些女郎
944
00:48:54,118 --> 00:48:54,674
没问题吧？
945
00:48:54,984 --> 00:48:56,540
大问题呀！完全不合水平
946
00:48:56,584 --> 00:48:57,346
那怎么办？
947
00:48:57,370 --> 00:48:59,336
是吗？我给你换过吧
948
00:49:00,012 --> 00:49:02,705
太好了！你也换掉更好
949
00:49:03,545 --> 00:49:04,704
女儿们，我们走吧
950
00:49:04,979 --> 00:49:07,410
各位，真对不起…对不起
951
00:49:08,112 --> 00:49:09,135
我快吐得没东西再吐了
952
00:49:09,178 --> 00:49:09,837
她们走了没有？
953
00:49:10,046 --> 00:49:11,046
差不多了
954
00:49:15,312 --> 00:49:17,335
老板，小姐们合意吗？
955
00:49:17,645 --> 00:49:20,611
死了…我快窒息了
956
00:49:23,012 --> 00:49:25,409
老板，你们好好享受吧，我走了
957
00:49:25,545 --> 00:49:26,875
妈妈生，你过一过来
958
00:49:27,178 --> 00:49:29,201
老板，有什么事？
959
00:49:29,612 --> 00:49:31,305
是不是小姐们不合你意？
960
00:49:31,545 --> 00:49:32,772
不合意的话可以换啊
961
00:49:33,812 --> 00:49:36,108
不是！我不是对她们不满意
962
00:49:36,712 --> 00:49:38,200
你替我叫那个臭男人出去吧
963
00:49:38,979 --> 00:49:42,070
那个臭男人？超哥是吗？
964
00:49:42,879 --> 00:49:43,879
是啊
965
00:49:44,079 --> 00:49:45,908
超哥…超哥
966
00:49:46,046 --> 00:49:47,636
什么事？
967
00:49:48,645 --> 00:49:51,304
宝哥说要叫那个臭男人出去啊
968
00:49:51,779 --> 00:49:52,870
那个臭男人呀？
969
00:49:53,100 --> 00:49:54,191
是你呀！超哥
970
00:49:54,434 --> 00:49:55,434
放聪明点吧
971
00:49:55,500 --> 00:49:58,057
他叫你出去可能有事要跟你商量啊
972
00:49:58,400 --> 00:49:59,661
好的
973
00:49:59,967 --> 00:50:01,489
宝爷，你好好享受吧
974
00:50:01,867 --> 00:50:03,230
快去招呼宝爷
975
00:50:04,067 --> 00:50:05,090
妈妈生，什么事？
976
00:50:05,434 --> 00:50:06,195
你真坏！这么久都不来看我
977
00:50:06,233 --> 00:50:07,233
你还说
978
00:50:08,600 --> 00:50:11,225
你讨厌！你那朋友也够风流啊
979
00:50:11,467 --> 00:50:12,797
是啊！一个带五个
980
00:50:13,067 --> 00:50:14,067
看他何时染上风流病
981
00:50:19,434 --> 00:50:20,457
财哥
982
00:50:20,701 --> 00:50:21,792
你是什么人？进来前竟然不敲门？
983
00:50:21,834 --> 00:50:22,857
我认识他的
984
00:50:24,300 --> 00:50:29,164
是我的朋友啊，我们好得要命啊
985
00:50:30,600 --> 00:50:32,896
不用说了，你的样子也快死了
986
00:50:33,367 --> 00:50:35,299
居然不招呼我？当我不存在吗？
987
00:50:35,600 --> 00:50:36,600
出来
988
00:50:39,067 --> 00:50:41,124
没钱的话就别跟我抢妞啊
989
00:50:41,934 --> 00:50:44,422
你打他我不介意
990
00:50:44,634 --> 00:50:47,532
但你将妞们带走，这可万万不能啊
991
00:50:47,667 --> 00:50:48,667
算了吧宝爷！生命诚可贵
992
00:50:48,867 --> 00:50:50,230
远离艾滋病啊
993
00:50:50,801 --> 00:50:51,824
你说得对
994
00:50:52,934 --> 00:50:57,832
我岂不是要远离你？你像个屁精啊
995
00:50:58,734 --> 00:51:00,632
你怎知我是屁精呢？
996
00:51:12,167 --> 00:51:13,690
看什么看？
997
00:51:15,200 --> 00:51:16,530
很大啊
998
00:51:16,901 --> 00:51:19,423
阿叔，你这辈子有没有见过
999
00:51:19,467 --> 00:51:20,626
这么大的一条毛啊？
1000
00:51:21,767 --> 00:51:23,824
看清楚一点又不像毛啊
1001
00:51:25,400 --> 00:51:27,764
没有毛是这个颜色的
1002
00:51:28,734 --> 00:51:31,632
但这么幼，决不会是
1003
00:51:33,434 --> 00:51:34,627
你娘的
1004
00:51:42,667 --> 00:51:44,599
我没封你穴道，干嘛眼定定的？
1005
00:51:53,167 --> 00:51:55,133
火烧小红肠
1006
00:51:59,367 --> 00:52:00,560
究竟放了在那儿呢？
1007
00:52:00,767 --> 00:52:02,494
原来在这！等一等
1008
00:52:03,534 --> 00:52:04,261
什么事
1009
00:52:04,534 --> 00:52:05,693
为了做福人群，为己为人
1010
00:52:05,934 --> 00:52:07,832
跟女人上床时必备的战场尡？
1011
00:52:08,033 --> 00:52:09,033
你收起它吧
1012
00:52:09,067 --> 00:52:10,328
你不想中镖吧？
1013
00:52:11,296 --> 00:52:12,319
这究竟是什么呢？
1014
00:52:22,349 --> 00:52:23,610
中镖
1015
00:52:26,678 --> 00:52:27,473
我帮你吧
1016
00:52:27,498 --> 00:52:29,225
不用了！我自己会应付
1017
00:52:36,210 --> 00:52:37,471
很淡啊
1018
00:52:37,778 --> 00:52:40,005
险些儿忘记了，你也要舐
1019
00:52:40,844 --> 00:52:43,105
不用了…不用了
1020
00:52:43,144 --> 00:52:44,474
不能不用啊
1021
00:52:44,711 --> 00:52:46,142
有什么事时我负担不来啊
1022
00:52:46,377 --> 00:52:50,309
来…照做吧，不舐不给你钱
1023
00:52:51,144 --> 00:52:52,804
有钱人真是变态
1024
00:53:00,023 --> 00:53:02,387
等一等！交换吧
1025
00:53:02,990 --> 00:53:04,047
干嘛？
1026
00:53:04,290 --> 00:53:04,983
你吃得这么津津有味
1027
00:53:05,223 --> 00:53:06,280
你的一定更美味
1028
00:53:06,890 --> 00:53:09,254
别再耍了，我们来吧
1029
00:53:10,190 --> 00:53:12,019
不能这样，如果你是皇后
1030
00:53:12,057 --> 00:53:13,489
我会被处死啊
1031
00:53:13,791 --> 00:53:15,051
你试试这个吧
1032
00:53:15,390 --> 00:53:17,686
不用试啊！保证你满意
1033
00:53:18,023 --> 00:53:19,989
定要试！你先拿着这东西吧
1034
00:53:21,457 --> 00:53:22,457
不是这枝呀
1035
00:53:22,691 --> 00:53:23,691
究竟是那一枝呢？
1036
00:53:23,757 --> 00:53:24,757
幼的那枝
1037
00:53:25,923 --> 00:53:26,923
干嘛？
1038
00:53:26,957 --> 00:53:32,584
红色？她岂不是个淫妇
1039
00:53:32,824 --> 00:53:34,653
跟你来这地方的，难道会是处女吗？
1040
00:53:34,691 --> 00:53:35,315
来吧
1041
00:53:35,657 --> 00:53:37,520
不是皇后，那就可以上啊
1042
00:53:54,057 --> 00:53:55,717
今天晚上冷清清的
1043
00:53:55,957 --> 00:53:56,957
看！他们是什么人呢？
1044
00:53:56,990 --> 00:53:57,990
过去盘问一下
1045
00:53:59,390 --> 00:54:01,151
老兄，在这儿干什么？
1046
00:54:01,957 --> 00:54:03,116
你们是从那里来的？
1047
00:54:03,990 --> 00:54:04,990
有没有身份证呀？
1048
00:54:05,190 --> 00:54:07,019
身份证呀？没身份证的话就抓你们
1049
00:54:18,857 --> 00:54:19,618
喂？
1050
00:54:19,857 --> 00:54:21,686
糟糕了
1051
00:54:22,257 --> 00:54:24,189
这儿没有人姓“糟”名“糕了”的
1052
00:54:24,390 --> 00:54:25,390
阿超呀
1053
00:54:26,090 --> 00:54:27,716
阿超？阿超外出了
1054
00:54:27,923 --> 00:54:28,946
你妈的
1055
00:54:29,190 --> 00:54:31,951
老兄，阿超外出了关我妈什么呢？
1056
00:54:32,257 --> 00:54:33,223
你要问候我老妈的话
1057
00:54:33,257 --> 00:54:34,257
你要回到三百年前
1058
00:54:34,390 --> 00:54:34,980
我来了
1059
00:54:35,257 --> 00:54:37,815
来了？我会怕你吗？
1060
00:54:38,090 --> 00:54:38,715
我现在在门口啊
1061
00:54:38,957 --> 00:54:41,150
现在？门口，这么快
1062
00:54:41,457 --> 00:54:42,150
开门吧
1063
00:54:42,357 --> 00:54:43,357
好的
1064
00:54:45,923 --> 00:54:48,321
阿超？来到了就按门铃嘛
1065
00:54:48,557 --> 00:54:49,648
你怎么说起话来不清不楚的？
1066
00:54:49,890 --> 00:54:51,447
如果被人硬要你吞下五个榴挞
1067
00:54:51,691 --> 00:54:53,623
你说话也会不清不楚啊
1068
00:54:54,757 --> 00:54:56,052
你要找的人就是他了
1069
00:54:57,957 --> 00:54:59,480
干嘛用这家伙指着我？
1070
00:54:59,890 --> 00:55:01,083
我们是不认识的啊
1071
00:55:02,557 --> 00:55:03,954
再推我的话我就动手
1072
00:55:05,990 --> 00:55:07,456
雄哥，你要找我
1073
00:55:07,724 --> 00:55:09,212
就打电话到我的传呼台就是了
1074
00:55:09,490 --> 00:55:11,319
用不着麻烦你这么多兄弟来请我呢？
1075
00:55:11,557 --> 00:55:14,546
你这混蛋！没钱时就晓得来向我借
1076
00:55:14,791 --> 00:55:16,450
有钱时不还却去鬼混
1077
00:55:16,591 --> 00:55:17,920
去鬼混也不打紧
1078
00:55:18,223 --> 00:55:19,553
竟然胆敢跟我的兄弟抢女人
1079
00:55:19,890 --> 00:55:24,152
抢输了却用邪门怪招来耍我的兄弟
1080
00:55:24,557 --> 00:55:26,318
差不多一星期了，没被蚂蚁吃了吗？
1081
00:55:26,557 --> 00:55:28,785
雄哥，我怎敢耍你的兄弟呢？
1082
00:55:29,057 --> 00:55:30,057
没有你那有我呢？
1083
00:55:30,657 --> 00:55:33,316
废话少说！快帮我的兄弟料理一下吧
1084
00:55:33,524 --> 00:55:34,524
好的
1085
00:55:34,791 --> 00:55:35,791
宝少
1086
00:55:35,857 --> 00:55:36,857
好的
1087
00:55:36,923 --> 00:55:37,923
解穴道啊
1088
00:55:43,591 --> 00:55:45,250
小心点…慢慢来
1089
00:55:49,524 --> 00:55:52,217
解穴呀
1090
00:55:53,557 --> 00:55:54,716
快动手
1091
00:55:56,757 --> 00:55:58,086
快些做完就走吧
1092
00:56:22,390 --> 00:56:25,879
快动手吧！不要看了，那个是嫂子啊
1093
00:56:26,123 --> 00:56:27,123
什么？
1094
00:56:27,490 --> 00:56:28,615
你在看什么？
1095
00:56:29,223 --> 00:56:31,212
我见到一只蟹钳着一只老鼠
1096
00:56:31,257 --> 00:56:32,348
十分有趣啊
1097
00:56:36,757 --> 00:56:38,347
那老鼠叫米奇啊
1098
00:56:38,591 --> 00:56:39,682
后面那只蟹叫什么蟹？
1099
00:56:40,023 --> 00:56:41,114
羔蟹
1100
00:56:42,557 --> 00:56:43,557
扁他
1101
00:56:57,657 --> 00:56:58,850
怎样称呼呢？
1102
00:56:59,724 --> 00:57:00,724
怎样称呼呢？
1103
00:57:02,557 --> 00:57:03,988
叫我小宝就行了
1104
00:57:04,223 --> 00:57:06,781
宝少，你以后跟着我吧…不
1105
00:57:07,023 --> 00:57:08,717
我跟你，我是你的门生
1106
00:57:09,023 --> 00:57:11,148
不是吧，小雄？
1107
00:57:11,657 --> 00:57:12,657
别说这种话
1108
00:57:12,824 --> 00:57:14,847
雄哥，我们同是洪门兄弟
1109
00:57:15,757 --> 00:57:16,882
你的事即是我的事
1110
00:57:16,923 --> 00:57:18,389
不是！不是
1111
00:57:18,657 --> 00:57:19,850
我说怎样就怎样啊
1112
00:57:20,223 --> 00:57:20,916
这位是嫂子吗？
1113
00:57:21,123 --> 00:57:22,180
是呀…!
1114
00:57:37,023 --> 00:57:39,148
喂？大吉利事
1115
00:57:39,234 --> 00:57:42,996
喂？我是小霞呀，你在做什么？
1116
00:57:43,268 --> 00:57:44,268
我在做爱啊
1117
00:57:44,401 --> 00:57:45,560
你说什么？
1118
00:57:46,234 --> 00:57:50,394
我说…阿超正看做爱的色情带
1119
00:57:50,635 --> 00:57:51,964
让我先去将电视机的音量调低
1120
00:57:52,234 --> 00:57:54,029
你将电视关上吧
1121
00:57:55,101 --> 00:57:58,261
他看了一半，我想他不肯关上啊
1122
00:57:59,134 --> 00:58:01,066
那么，你出来吗？
1123
00:58:01,901 --> 00:58:03,527
现在还不行啊
1124
00:58:05,401 --> 00:58:09,527
那什么时候才出呢？什么时候呀？
1125
00:58:09,834 --> 00:58:10,857
我想很快就可以出了
1126
00:58:15,768 --> 00:58:18,598
出来了…出来了
1127
00:58:18,801 --> 00:58:20,925
这么静，你把电视关上了吗？
1128
00:58:21,635 --> 00:58:23,362
出来是吗？
1129
00:58:24,268 --> 00:58:26,166
七夫人，你快点吧
1130
00:58:26,434 --> 00:58:27,764
你要想想办法啊
1131
00:58:29,067 --> 00:58:31,931
找得我们这么急，究竟什么事呢？
1132
00:58:32,768 --> 00:58:34,131
你们不要吵
1133
00:58:35,568 --> 00:58:38,557
吴三桂派了杀手去追杀我们的老公
1134
00:58:39,301 --> 00:58:42,358
糟糕了！老公岂不是很危险
1135
00:58:43,468 --> 00:58:44,899
快想办法吧
1136
00:58:45,268 --> 00:58:48,701
不要吵！双儿的武功最高
1137
00:58:49,001 --> 00:58:51,661
所以，我决定和双儿去保护老公
1138
00:59:20,067 --> 00:59:21,397
怎么这么久还没有滚呢？
1139
00:59:22,934 --> 00:59:27,264
让我看一看！你不要动嘛
1140
00:59:31,167 --> 00:59:32,928
我忘记了发功啊
1141
00:59:43,635 --> 00:59:44,828
你的餐巾歪了
1142
01:00:07,768 --> 01:00:09,734
功发得太尽啊
1143
01:00:10,401 --> 01:00:12,958
滚了，厉害吗？
1144
01:00:13,301 --> 01:00:14,790
你以为我真的看不见你用脚趾
1145
01:00:14,834 --> 01:00:16,357
偷偷的将电掣接上吗？
1146
01:00:17,535 --> 01:00:18,660
就算说了你也不会明白
1147
01:00:18,867 --> 01:00:19,867
来吧！吃东西吧
1148
01:00:20,268 --> 01:00:23,257
我买了你喜欢吃的鱿鱼和牛柏叶
1149
01:00:23,601 --> 01:00:24,760
你记不记得今天是什么日子呢？
1150
01:00:25,034 --> 01:00:26,863
什么日子？星期五嘛
1151
01:00:28,668 --> 01:00:29,827
是关于我的
1152
01:00:30,034 --> 01:00:31,034
真的这么凑巧吗？
1153
01:00:31,934 --> 01:00:37,561
月…经来了
1154
01:00:37,967 --> 01:00:39,194
你真坏
1155
01:00:39,735 --> 01:00:41,667
很舒服啊！再打我吧
1156
01:00:42,167 --> 01:00:43,894
你打死了我没人跟你祝寿啊
1157
01:00:44,535 --> 01:00:47,898
还说？你说过替我办一个意想不到的
1158
01:00:47,934 --> 01:00:49,230
生日会的
1159
01:00:49,501 --> 01:00:50,762
我什么也没有做过不算意想不到吗？
1160
01:00:51,134 --> 01:00:52,134
礼物也没有啊
1161
01:00:53,001 --> 01:00:54,001
你骗我
1162
01:00:54,535 --> 01:00:56,125
当然是骗你啊
1163
01:00:59,234 --> 01:01:04,257
皇帝送给我的！不是很名贵的
1164
01:01:07,768 --> 01:01:09,233
你今天真漂亮
1165
01:01:11,834 --> 01:01:13,391
我昨天很丑陋吗？
1166
01:01:14,401 --> 01:01:17,094
不用说，昨天固然也很漂亮啊
1167
01:01:17,901 --> 01:01:20,629
今天是你生日
1168
01:01:21,834 --> 01:01:24,062
无论如何都要亲你一口来庆贺
1169
01:01:26,368 --> 01:01:30,357
我意思是想向你借些高利贷
1170
01:01:30,501 --> 01:01:31,558
什么意思呢？
1171
01:01:32,501 --> 01:01:36,297
即是脷“利”上加脷“利
1172
01:01:36,834 --> 01:01:37,925
很恶心的
1173
01:01:38,167 --> 01:01:40,258
点也不恶心，还可以止渴呢
1174
01:01:40,501 --> 01:01:41,501
来吧
1175
01:01:48,301 --> 01:01:50,994
各位奇装异服，小如芝蔴
1176
01:01:51,201 --> 01:01:54,292
破门而入的人有何贵干？
1177
01:01:54,535 --> 01:01:57,126
你真斗胆，竟敢上我老婆
1178
01:01:59,001 --> 01:02:03,195
原来是雄哥，我那有上你老婆呢？
1179
01:02:03,934 --> 01:02:05,866
你以为穿成这个样子就会没事吗？
1180
01:02:10,934 --> 01:02:11,934
想封我穴道？
1181
01:02:12,001 --> 01:02:13,001
我想插你双眼
1182
01:02:19,034 --> 01:02:20,034
小宝
1183
01:02:20,801 --> 01:02:21,801
看管着她
1184
01:02:22,635 --> 01:02:23,895
不要动
1185
01:02:27,268 --> 01:02:28,598
我在我老婆的手袋中
1186
01:02:28,635 --> 01:02:30,498
找到了一条不属于我的内裤
1187
01:02:32,535 --> 01:02:33,398
那你为什么还在笑呢？
1188
01:02:33,434 --> 01:02:35,922
不，算是多一条内裤来穿吧
1189
01:02:36,167 --> 01:02:36,656
我找人监视我老婆
1190
01:02:36,967 --> 01:02:37,967
原来她真的背着我去偷汉
1191
01:02:38,234 --> 01:02:39,461
你还想抵赖？
1192
01:02:43,501 --> 01:02:46,331
不错！成年人不做暗事
1193
01:02:46,967 --> 01:02:51,161
内裤是我的，雄嫂也是我勾引的
1194
01:02:51,434 --> 01:02:53,400
雄嫂这么性感惹火
1195
01:02:53,568 --> 01:02:55,158
试问世间那有男人不想跟
1196
01:02:55,434 --> 01:02:58,491
这种性感女神做朋友呢？
1197
01:02:58,880 --> 01:02:59,880
你说
1198
01:03:00,401 --> 01:03:01,401
想不想上雄嫂？
1199
01:03:01,434 --> 01:03:02,798
想！…不
1200
01:03:03,201 --> 01:03:04,201
他也说想啊
1201
01:03:04,501 --> 01:03:07,864
老大，不是呀，他耍我而已
1202
01:03:08,201 --> 01:03:10,030
你想的话不妨直说啊
1203
01:03:10,201 --> 01:03:11,792
总之，勾二嫂的杀无赦
1204
01:03:12,034 --> 01:03:13,660
你说错了，你是老大
1205
01:03:13,701 --> 01:03:14,826
她是大嫂不是二嫂啊
1206
01:03:16,934 --> 01:03:19,127
情不自禁罢了！绝不会有下次的
1207
01:03:19,268 --> 01:03:21,461
傻瓜，我们是兄弟嘛
1208
01:03:21,701 --> 01:03:24,189
夫妇如衣服而己，是吗？
1209
01:03:24,434 --> 01:03:25,434
说得对啊
1210
01:03:25,501 --> 01:03:26,989
衣服不可以同穿的怎可称兄道弟呢？
1211
01:03:29,101 --> 01:03:31,624
这儿没房出租，你走吧
1212
01:03:34,034 --> 01:03:35,295
雄哥，不要误伤无辜呀
1213
01:03:35,568 --> 01:03:36,568
她是来租房子而己
1214
01:03:36,834 --> 01:03:37,425
小宝
1215
01:03:37,701 --> 01:03:39,962
带他进来，让他看看怎样做爱
1216
01:03:40,668 --> 01:03:42,156
不用了吧，我会很害怕啊
1217
01:03:42,662 --> 01:03:44,150
雄哥的女人他都敢动
1218
01:03:44,429 --> 01:03:45,918
不将他大卸八块才怪
1219
01:03:46,162 --> 01:03:47,458
大哥雄的手下？
1220
01:03:53,482 --> 01:03:55,380
你在这上上我的女人
1221
01:03:55,649 --> 01:03:57,239
我就在这床上报仇
1222
01:03:57,749 --> 01:03:59,408
雄哥，你无谓伤害她
1223
01:03:59,616 --> 01:04:00,775
不是她勾引你的女人，是我而己
1224
01:04:00,816 --> 01:04:02,247
不如我被你上…不…不
1225
01:04:02,282 --> 01:04:04,510
她只是贱货，无谓浪费你的时间啊
1226
01:04:07,883 --> 01:04:09,781
贱货？贱货的话就一枪打死她
1227
01:04:10,016 --> 01:04:13,846
不…不，她对着其他人就是贱货
1228
01:04:14,049 --> 01:04:16,480
但对着雄哥时，贱货也变骚货啊
1229
01:04:18,949 --> 01:04:21,177
脱衣服！快点脱
1230
01:04:22,315 --> 01:04:23,315
雄哥
1231
01:04:23,515 --> 01:04:24,640
脱呀，快点
1232
01:04:33,282 --> 01:04:34,282
脱呀，快点
1233
01:04:43,149 --> 01:04:44,205
脱呀，快点
1234
01:04:48,182 --> 01:04:49,910
快走呀…快走呀
1235
01:04:52,582 --> 01:04:53,673
跳！
1236
01:04:57,883 --> 01:04:58,348
想死吗？
1237
01:04:58,382 --> 01:04:59,712
对不起！撞坏了一点点而已
1238
01:04:59,916 --> 01:05:00,939
快走呀
1239
01:05:03,515 --> 01:05:04,515
雄哥
1240
01:05:13,415 --> 01:05:15,347
你们快走！不要管我
1241
01:05:15,749 --> 01:05:16,840
快跳下来
1242
01:05:23,382 --> 01:05:24,746
阿超
1243
01:05:26,816 --> 01:05:27,816
上车吧
1244
01:05:34,415 --> 01:05:35,415
追
1245
01:05:35,616 --> 01:05:36,741
华叔…华叔
1246
01:05:37,049 --> 01:05:38,275
干嘛大呼小叫的
1247
01:05:41,016 --> 01:05:42,379
究竟发生了什么事？
1248
01:05:42,616 --> 01:05:43,809
小霞，快拿些东西来让他咬着
1249
01:05:44,049 --> 01:05:45,275
华叔，帮我将他反转
1250
01:05:46,449 --> 01:05:48,745
竟敢开枪射警察，谁这么斗胆呢？
1251
01:05:49,149 --> 01:05:51,376
很痛呀
1252
01:05:51,649 --> 01:05:53,013
不用担心，没事的
1253
01:05:54,116 --> 01:05:55,274
咬着它
1254
01:05:56,883 --> 01:05:59,008
放心，我用内功将子弹逼出来
1255
01:05:59,916 --> 01:06:01,075
让我拿着些东西吧
1256
01:06:01,315 --> 01:06:03,145
不用了！拿不拿着都是一样的
1257
01:06:19,916 --> 01:06:21,609
他的屁真够劲啊
1258
01:06:21,849 --> 01:06:22,872
这是正常的
1259
01:06:27,349 --> 01:06:30,213
我有点不舒服，我要回去吃药
1260
01:06:30,382 --> 01:06:31,405
好的
1261
01:06:35,716 --> 01:06:36,716
你再逼他
1262
01:06:36,849 --> 01:06:38,314
会不会连粪便都逼了出来
1263
01:06:39,149 --> 01:06:40,239
可能会
1264
01:06:50,616 --> 01:06:51,980
有没有快感？
1265
01:06:52,682 --> 01:06:54,648
太快了，什么也感觉不到
1266
01:06:55,649 --> 01:06:56,649
第一次吗
1267
01:06:56,782 --> 01:06:58,179
是呀！你怎会知道？
1268
01:06:58,415 --> 01:07:00,041
看见你的屁股就知道了，红红的
1269
01:07:00,415 --> 01:07:01,472
真丢脸
1270
01:07:01,682 --> 01:07:02,682
不用感激我
1271
01:07:02,816 --> 01:07:03,816
我不会感激你
1272
01:07:04,016 --> 01:07:05,016
你不会生我的气吧？
1273
01:07:05,083 --> 01:07:06,673
傻瓜！我们是朋友嘛
1274
01:07:06,716 --> 01:07:07,716
去死吧
1275
01:07:08,083 --> 01:07:09,083
你干嘛
1276
01:07:09,182 --> 01:07:10,842
勾引雄嫂你竟然不叫我一同去？
1277
01:07:13,828 --> 01:07:15,317
我替你约她下星期二吧
1278
01:07:15,561 --> 01:07:16,652
恐怕到时我还未复原啊
1279
01:07:16,895 --> 01:07:18,156
你还未复原的话那我就代替你
1280
01:07:18,495 --> 01:07:20,757
华叔，小霞晕倒了
1281
01:07:21,162 --> 01:07:22,855
华叔，你代我照顾阿超
1282
01:07:23,162 --> 01:07:24,162
我去看看小霞
1283
01:07:24,528 --> 01:07:25,687
阿超
1284
01:07:26,828 --> 01:07:27,919
阿超，你怎么样？
1285
01:07:28,229 --> 01:07:29,694
让一让
1286
01:07:30,661 --> 01:07:33,889
双眼翻白，手又这么冷
1287
01:07:34,395 --> 01:07:36,884
你们让开呀！围着她她不能呼吸啊
1288
01:07:37,162 --> 01:07:39,719
你们出去…你们出去
1289
01:07:39,995 --> 01:07:41,688
再不走我就将你们强奸
1290
01:07:42,062 --> 01:07:43,255
你想得挺美啊
1291
01:07:48,295 --> 01:07:51,284
镇静点！我正用龟波气功替你疗伤
1292
01:07:51,528 --> 01:07:54,653
怎么你没作声我仍能听见你说话的？
1293
01:07:55,262 --> 01:07:57,659
因为我发功时会跟你心灵相通
1294
01:07:57,862 --> 01:07:59,828
互相可以听到对方心内的说话
1295
01:08:01,395 --> 01:08:02,918
你懂得特异功能？
1296
01:08:03,428 --> 01:08:05,485
不是功能！是武功
1297
01:08:05,795 --> 01:08:08,023
我告诉过你，我是古代人啊
1298
01:08:10,461 --> 01:08:12,825
不要用这种眼神看着我
1299
01:08:13,262 --> 01:08:15,160
否则很易令我走火入魔
1300
01:08:25,162 --> 01:08:28,322
很诱人的一双
1301
01:08:28,661 --> 01:08:30,854
不能看！会走火入魔的
1302
01:08:31,295 --> 01:08:32,760
就算入魔也要看啊
1303
01:08:33,162 --> 01:08:35,627
太刺激了
1304
01:08:41,395 --> 01:08:47,521
小宝…小宝，你没事吧？
1305
01:08:48,195 --> 01:08:52,321
没事！只是流一点儿血
1306
01:08:52,528 --> 01:08:55,892
算是新陈代谢吧
1307
01:08:56,162 --> 01:08:57,162
小宝…
1308
01:08:57,661 --> 01:08:59,456
怎么样？好了点没有？
1309
01:08:59,661 --> 01:09:01,093
很辛苦啊
1310
01:09:01,495 --> 01:09:02,586
你觉得那儿不舒服？
1311
01:09:02,828 --> 01:09:04,384
我全身都不舒服
1312
01:09:04,595 --> 01:09:09,584
这里…这里…这里
1313
01:09:09,862 --> 01:09:11,327
总之全身都不舒服
1314
01:09:11,561 --> 01:09:12,652
真的很不舒服吗？
1315
01:09:12,895 --> 01:09:15,827
是呀！不知怎的，很不舒服啊
1316
01:09:16,361 --> 01:09:17,918
你真的是古代人？
1317
01:09:18,862 --> 01:09:20,327
你不信的话我可以证明给你看
1318
01:09:22,361 --> 01:09:23,055
如果不是古代人又怎会
1319
01:09:23,095 --> 01:09:24,390
懂得封穴道呢？
1320
01:09:26,661 --> 01:09:29,093
我不管了，趁机抱她一抱
1321
01:09:32,328 --> 01:09:36,818
我喜欢你很久了，趁机亲一口吧
1322
01:09:37,129 --> 01:09:38,355
趁机摸
1323
01:09:40,262 --> 01:09:42,853
我告诉你，我现在就可以上了你
1324
01:09:43,895 --> 01:09:47,293
虽然我有轻薄你之心
1325
01:09:47,528 --> 01:09:50,290
但我却没有非礼你的胆量
1326
01:09:50,495 --> 01:09:54,757
因为…佣俗的说一句，我很敬重你
1327
01:09:55,095 --> 01:09:57,084
对你有一点点，ove（爱情）
1328
01:09:57,295 --> 01:09:58,351
你还不走？
1329
01:10:04,561 --> 01:10:07,425
干嘛要扮君子呢？应该上了再说嘛
1330
01:10:07,628 --> 01:10:08,628
干嘛要扮君子呢？应该上了再说嘛
1331
01:10:11,062 --> 01:10:13,823
不上她又怎对得起自己呢
1332
01:10:14,461 --> 01:10:15,461
你…
1333
01:10:15,795 --> 01:10:16,920
你想干什么？
1334
01:10:17,395 --> 01:10:19,623
我想
1335
01:10:23,262 --> 01:10:24,262
你想怎么样？
1336
01:10:24,461 --> 01:10:25,688
我想
1337
01:11:56,795 --> 01:11:58,624
早安！弄早点给我吃吗？
1338
01:11:59,095 --> 01:12:00,322
牙膏你吃不吃呢
1339
01:12:04,195 --> 01:12:06,786
为什么昨天晚上
1340
01:12:06,962 --> 01:12:09,427
你好像300年内没干过那件事似的
1341
01:12:10,395 --> 01:12:13,361
你千万不要误会，我一向都是这么
1342
01:12:13,595 --> 01:12:14,618
差劲的
1343
01:12:16,162 --> 01:12:17,388
你肚子饿吗？
1344
01:12:17,628 --> 01:12:18,628
我去买东西给你吃好吗
1345
01:12:19,195 --> 01:12:20,195
怎好意思呢？
1346
01:12:22,328 --> 01:12:23,328
还不去
1347
01:12:25,828 --> 01:12:26,828
什么？
1348
01:12:31,661 --> 01:12:32,854
你真坏
1349
01:12:36,295 --> 01:12:37,295
麻烦
1350
01:12:43,062 --> 01:12:46,119
女人真的痴缠，麻烦
1351
01:12:48,295 --> 01:12:50,726
门没有锁上，怎么自己都记不起呢？
1352
01:12:52,062 --> 01:12:53,459
是不是忘了带钱
1353
01:12:53,628 --> 01:12:54,855
老公
1354
01:12:58,528 --> 01:13:00,323
糟糕了
1355
01:13:07,095 --> 01:13:09,084
老公，有没有挂念着我呀
1356
01:13:09,528 --> 01:13:11,085
我每天都挂念着你
1357
01:13:11,295 --> 01:13:11,953
真的？
1358
01:13:12,162 --> 01:13:13,162
是啊
1359
01:13:13,461 --> 01:13:15,484
这种地方怎能住人呢？
1360
01:13:15,728 --> 01:13:16,728
是啊
1361
01:13:17,795 --> 01:13:18,920
有没有找女人？
1362
01:13:19,129 --> 01:13:20,129
不敢
1363
01:13:21,361 --> 01:13:24,260
那么有没有去青楼、妓寨呢？
1364
01:13:24,495 --> 01:13:27,427
没有！现代人不流行这玩意
1365
01:13:27,895 --> 01:13:28,895
累不累？
1366
01:13:32,328 --> 01:13:34,817
那你一个怎么解决呢？
1367
01:13:35,262 --> 01:13:36,352
个解决什么呢？
1368
01:13:39,795 --> 01:13:41,056
靠双手嘛
1369
01:13:41,862 --> 01:13:44,453
左手还是右手呢？
1370
01:13:45,695 --> 01:13:48,855
两只手轮流来用
1371
01:13:49,428 --> 01:13:51,951
真是难为了它们啊
1372
01:13:52,795 --> 01:13:54,193
它们是自愿的
1373
01:13:54,661 --> 01:13:55,854
那女人是谁？
1374
01:13:56,661 --> 01:13:57,888
谁呀？
1375
01:13:57,928 --> 01:13:59,484
那个呀
1376
01:13:59,795 --> 01:14:04,454
她？她是我同房间超的母亲啊
1377
01:14:04,795 --> 01:14:06,022
她已经去世了
1378
01:14:06,262 --> 01:14:07,727
她已经去世了
1379
01:14:12,495 --> 01:14:13,756
这是什么？
1380
01:14:15,828 --> 01:14:18,623
这是…罩啊
1381
01:14:18,795 --> 01:14:19,453
罩什么的
1382
01:14:19,695 --> 01:14:20,422
罩雨啊
1383
01:14:20,628 --> 01:14:21,355
罩雨？
1384
01:14:21,595 --> 01:14:23,390
你有所不知了，现代人很流行
1385
01:14:23,695 --> 01:14:25,661
每当下雨时就带这个罩上街
1386
01:14:25,962 --> 01:14:28,621
它的作用是用来载着雨
1387
01:14:29,262 --> 01:14:30,989
口渴时用来饮的
1388
01:14:31,995 --> 01:14:33,426
原来是罩雨的
1389
01:14:33,728 --> 01:14:36,126
大雨时用个人的，小雨时用个小的
1390
01:14:36,328 --> 01:14:38,419
没有下雨时就不用戴
1391
01:14:38,628 --> 01:14:41,492
老公，我们来了差不多一个月了
1392
01:14:42,162 --> 01:14:43,162
那又怎么样？
1393
01:14:43,328 --> 01:14:44,760
我们每天都看电视广告
1394
01:14:45,162 --> 01:14:47,060
我最初来时也很喜欢看电视广告
1395
01:14:48,795 --> 01:14:49,886
你以为我不知道吗？
1396
01:14:50,195 --> 01:14:51,320
他们真的叫这些做乳罩啊
1397
01:14:52,828 --> 01:14:53,317
老婆
1398
01:14:53,661 --> 01:14:55,127
用不着用大力鹰爪功手对付我吧
1399
01:14:57,528 --> 01:14:58,653
不要乱来啊
1400
01:15:04,595 --> 01:15:07,027
我死定了！老婆，不要乱来啊
1401
01:15:14,461 --> 01:15:16,052
收弗屎“图文传真”呀，帅哥
1402
01:15:16,262 --> 01:15:17,262
什么屎呀？
1403
01:15:17,361 --> 01:15:18,657
你想找的皇后呀
1404
01:15:19,328 --> 01:15:20,328
皇后？
1405
01:15:24,162 --> 01:15:25,162
看看漂不漂亮？
1406
01:15:25,695 --> 01:15:27,161
这么老怎会是皇后呢？
1407
01:15:27,428 --> 01:15:29,326
耍我
1408
01:15:29,595 --> 01:15:31,458
跟着来的才是真的
1409
01:15:35,795 --> 01:15:37,818
小霞…小霞
1410
01:15:37,928 --> 01:15:39,292
昨天晚上或是昨天下午
1411
01:15:39,528 --> 01:15:41,494
或是昨天早上你曾跟小宝上床呢
1412
01:15:42,695 --> 01:15:44,286
你干嘛问得这么直接？
1413
01:15:44,495 --> 01:15:45,620
糟糕了！你笑得这么骚
1414
01:15:45,661 --> 01:15:46,991
你们一定是搞上了
1415
01:15:47,328 --> 01:15:48,328
你一定会后悔
1416
01:15:48,361 --> 01:15:49,361
我不会后悔的
1417
01:15:49,461 --> 01:15:50,291
小宝会啊
1418
01:15:50,461 --> 01:15:52,620
小宝也不会啊！我对他这么好
1419
01:15:52,895 --> 01:15:53,918
你不可以喜欢小宝的
1420
01:15:54,361 --> 01:15:55,361
为什么？
1421
01:15:56,361 --> 01:15:57,452
难道你爱上了我？
1422
01:15:57,628 --> 01:15:58,821
不是啊
1423
01:15:59,428 --> 01:16:01,451
不会的！如果你爱的话
1424
01:16:01,695 --> 01:16:02,922
早就爱上我了
1425
01:16:03,328 --> 01:16:04,351
难道你是同性恋？
1426
01:16:04,561 --> 01:16:05,822
神经病！我是带枪的
1427
01:16:05,995 --> 01:16:07,188
警察不会同性恋吗？
1428
01:16:07,428 --> 01:16:07,951
你说得对
1429
01:16:08,229 --> 01:16:09,160
你也承认了
1430
01:16:09,195 --> 01:16:10,218
神经病
1431
01:16:10,561 --> 01:16:12,925
你看看，你走起路来两腿张开
1432
01:16:12,962 --> 01:16:14,053
还说不是同性恋？
1433
01:16:14,295 --> 01:16:15,851
最近我常到深圳骑马而已
1434
01:16:16,062 --> 01:16:17,891
还有，我看见你洗泡泡浴
1435
01:16:18,095 --> 01:16:19,583
洗泡泡浴就是同性恋了吗
1436
01:16:19,828 --> 01:16:20,851
我自小就洗泡泡浴啊
1437
01:16:23,029 --> 01:16:25,392
我的房子不准同性恋者进去的
1438
01:16:25,661 --> 01:16:26,752
我要进去找小宝啊
1439
01:16:27,862 --> 01:16:28,862
小宝
1440
01:16:28,895 --> 01:16:31,986
救命呀！杀人呀
1441
01:16:35,528 --> 01:16:37,619
幻觉！一定是幻觉
1442
01:16:37,862 --> 01:16:39,794
你太爱小宝了，所以产生幻觉
1443
01:16:40,129 --> 01:16:41,322
你也看见啊？
1444
01:16:42,262 --> 01:16:44,693
实不相瞒，我是同性恋者
1445
01:16:44,962 --> 01:16:46,951
我太爱小宝了，所以我也有幻觉
1446
01:16:47,428 --> 01:16:48,519
情况实在太复杂了
1447
01:16:48,762 --> 01:16:50,058
我们去按摩清醒一下吧
1448
01:16:54,229 --> 01:16:56,218
是了吧？我早说过是幻觉啊
1449
01:16:56,461 --> 01:16:57,484
这里怎会有狗男女呢？
1450
01:16:57,762 --> 01:16:59,728
爱一个人是没有罪的，但不要太沉迷
1451
01:16:59,962 --> 01:17:00,985
我们走吧
1452
01:17:01,395 --> 01:17:03,327
救命呀
1453
01:17:05,361 --> 01:17:06,918
大哥，你控制一点嘛
1454
01:17:07,229 --> 01:17:08,320
你这样会弄脏小霞的地方
1455
01:17:08,528 --> 01:17:10,154
我也想！但我控制不住她们啊
1456
01:17:10,229 --> 01:17:11,524
你真的这么厉害？
1457
01:17:15,735 --> 01:17:20,861
这位清装姑娘一定是宋城做知客的
1458
01:17:20,902 --> 01:17:21,664
关你屁事吗？
1459
01:17:21,902 --> 01:17:23,300
问价钱嘛
1460
01:17:23,935 --> 01:17:25,299
我要你给我解释
1461
01:17:25,436 --> 01:17:27,527
老公，我也要你解释
1462
01:17:31,102 --> 01:17:34,728
还未介绍啊！这位是
1463
01:17:36,768 --> 01:17:37,768
我太太
1464
01:17:39,868 --> 01:17:41,164
如果我告诉你她是妓女
1465
01:17:41,402 --> 01:17:42,402
你会相信吗？
1466
01:17:42,502 --> 01:17:44,263
妓女怎会有这样好的身材呢？
1467
01:17:47,002 --> 01:17:48,593
如果我告诉你她是妓女
1468
01:17:48,968 --> 01:17:50,264
你不会相信吧？
1469
01:17:50,536 --> 01:17:52,195
妓女怎会有这么好身材呢
1470
01:17:52,802 --> 01:17:54,166
你说得对啊
1471
01:17:55,369 --> 01:17:56,800
我老实告诉你们
1472
01:17:57,235 --> 01:17:59,133
你们两个跟我都有关系
1473
01:17:59,536 --> 01:18:01,297
至于什么关系
1474
01:18:02,868 --> 01:18:04,198
我暂时还没想得出来
1475
01:18:05,436 --> 01:18:07,231
老公，这个人是谁？
1476
01:18:07,935 --> 01:18:10,128
又多了一个，这个差得多了
1477
01:18:10,402 --> 01:18:11,402
既然我还未想得出来
1478
01:18:11,669 --> 01:18:13,259
趁这个时候我们一起去吃饭好？
1479
01:18:13,502 --> 01:18:15,695
算了吧！人不风流枉少年
1480
01:18:15,968 --> 01:18:17,195
你好色我是知道的
1481
01:18:19,235 --> 01:18:20,235
你干嘛打我老公？
1482
01:18:20,502 --> 01:18:21,229
双儿
1483
01:18:21,369 --> 01:18:22,834
小霞…
1484
01:18:23,202 --> 01:18:25,134
你干嘛？你打算杀了她吗
1485
01:18:25,369 --> 01:18:26,494
干嘛你不追呢？
1486
01:18:26,935 --> 01:18:29,595
当然不追啊！那儿一个这儿有两个
1487
01:18:29,902 --> 01:18:30,902
当然留在这儿啊
1488
01:18:31,002 --> 01:18:32,002
说得对
1489
01:18:32,335 --> 01:18:34,028
有件小事刚才不敢打扰你
1490
01:18:34,335 --> 01:18:38,028
就是你叫我去找的皇后，已经找到了
1491
01:18:39,035 --> 01:18:40,035
谢谢你
1492
01:18:46,302 --> 01:18:47,359
皇后
1493
01:18:54,269 --> 01:18:55,292
真似师父啊
1494
01:18:55,868 --> 01:18:58,096
两位金姐，小宝能做得到的
1495
01:18:58,402 --> 01:18:59,731
小弟一样能够做得到
1496
01:19:00,035 --> 01:19:01,762
而且可能比他做得更好
1497
01:19:02,102 --> 01:19:03,363
不妨试一试吧
1498
01:19:03,802 --> 01:19:04,859
试试他吧
1499
01:19:06,102 --> 01:19:07,693
两个一齐上我也应付得来啊
1500
01:19:15,602 --> 01:19:22,501
小霞…小霞
1501
01:19:24,402 --> 01:19:26,698
小霞
1502
01:19:28,502 --> 01:19:29,661
她究竟去了那儿呢？
1503
01:19:31,569 --> 01:19:33,898
小霞
1504
01:19:37,135 --> 01:19:40,158
糟糕了！皇后不见了怎能交差呢？
1505
01:19:40,469 --> 01:19:41,560
小霞
1506
01:19:42,735 --> 01:19:43,894
你怎会在这儿？
1507
01:19:44,235 --> 01:19:46,064
我要你老实告诉我
1508
01:19:46,702 --> 01:19:47,826
你是否已经结婚？
1509
01:19:50,569 --> 01:19:52,194
小霞，你走得很快啊
1510
01:19:53,002 --> 01:19:54,332
不错！我是已经结婚
1511
01:19:54,669 --> 01:19:57,157
但这不重要啊，傻瓜
1512
01:19:57,868 --> 01:19:59,528
你还不止结过一次婚
1513
01:19:59,702 --> 01:20:02,133
是！但这也不重要啊
1514
01:20:02,402 --> 01:20:03,561
你这就是欺骗我吧
1515
01:20:03,702 --> 01:20:06,634
不错！但骗你也不是很重要
1516
01:20:06,902 --> 01:20:09,334
最重要的是，皇上的命等着你去救啊
1517
01:20:09,536 --> 01:20:12,127
救命应该去找医生啊！干嘛找我呢？
1518
01:20:12,369 --> 01:20:13,630
找你去做皇后啊
1519
01:20:17,469 --> 01:20:18,832
我有点儿头晕啊
1520
01:20:25,768 --> 01:20:26,666
先生，你真有眼光
1521
01:20:26,702 --> 01:20:27,792
这件明朝佩玉保存得很好
1522
01:20:27,835 --> 01:20:28,858
一点儿瑕疵也没有
1523
01:20:29,169 --> 01:20:31,567
色泽又好，又通透
1524
01:20:32,536 --> 01:20:33,933
真的很通透啊
1525
01:20:35,868 --> 01:20:37,027
给我看一看那件吧
1526
01:20:42,602 --> 01:20:43,931
先生，你买古董而已
1527
01:20:44,202 --> 01:20:46,191
用不着穿古装啊
1528
01:20:47,002 --> 01:20:48,831
这件玉乳房是怎样得来的
1529
01:20:49,302 --> 01:20:51,165
先生，你真够眼光
1530
01:20:51,402 --> 01:20:53,698
这家伙是个年青人刚拿来卖的
1531
01:20:53,902 --> 01:20:55,698
肯定是清朝的物品
1532
01:20:59,102 --> 01:21:03,330
清朝人嘛，三妻四妾是很平常的
1533
01:21:03,602 --> 01:21:05,090
糟糕了！连皇后也被我上了
1534
01:21:05,235 --> 01:21:06,599
今次一定被处斩了
1535
01:21:07,768 --> 01:21:10,928
宝爷，其实你有多少个老婆呢？
1536
01:21:12,369 --> 01:21:14,232
你有两个老婆真令人羡慕啊
1537
01:21:16,202 --> 01:21:18,100
七个？真的吗？
1538
01:21:18,868 --> 01:21:20,061
加上她就是八个了
1539
01:21:20,768 --> 01:21:22,325
让一个给我行吗？
1540
01:21:25,802 --> 01:21:27,496
我不要拿剑的那个
1541
01:21:29,868 --> 01:21:33,960
我喜欢戴着帽的那个，她皮肤够幼滑
1542
01:21:34,135 --> 01:21:35,135
你去死吧
1543
01:21:36,636 --> 01:21:37,693
神经病
1544
01:21:39,002 --> 01:21:42,900
对不起…或者让小霞给我吧
1545
01:21:50,202 --> 01:21:51,895
老公多讨几个老婆也不错嘛
1546
01:21:52,102 --> 01:21:55,626
个女人服侍一个男人很辛苦的
1547
01:21:55,835 --> 01:21:58,199
而且，你没有到过清朝
1548
01:21:58,235 --> 01:21:59,860
去看一看也无妨啊
1549
01:22:00,068 --> 01:22:01,364
你看，我的衣服多漂亮啊
1550
01:22:01,602 --> 01:22:02,602
你看看你自己
1551
01:22:02,835 --> 01:22:05,597
老公，差不多了
1552
01:22:05,902 --> 01:22:07,334
这样呢
1553
01:22:08,235 --> 01:22:09,235
你是什么人？
1554
01:22:16,302 --> 01:22:17,393
你干什么？
1555
01:22:24,302 --> 01:22:26,029
老公，什么事呀？
1556
01:22:31,436 --> 01:22:32,663
你这是什么态度呀？
1557
01:22:32,935 --> 01:22:36,333
竟要我堂堂的大清公主哄你求你
1558
01:22:36,602 --> 01:22:38,295
你别太不识相啊
1559
01:22:38,536 --> 01:22:40,331
皇后你也不做，你想做什么呢？
1560
01:22:51,194 --> 01:22:52,194
保护皇后
1561
01:22:56,295 --> 01:22:57,295
双儿，你对付她
1562
01:23:44,795 --> 01:23:45,283
拦着她
1563
01:23:45,461 --> 01:23:46,461
是
1564
01:24:34,728 --> 01:24:35,988
不用怕！让我来
1565
01:24:38,662 --> 01:24:40,594
他是不怕子弹的！快保护皇后先走
1566
01:24:42,695 --> 01:24:43,752
上方宝剑
1567
01:24:46,395 --> 01:24:47,622
短短的也能要你的命
1568
01:25:31,961 --> 01:25:36,257
糟糕了！小宝好像应付不来啊
1569
01:25:36,461 --> 01:25:39,621
不用怕我老公应付不来的话还有我
1570
01:25:44,829 --> 01:25:45,886
老公小宝
1571
01:25:46,829 --> 01:25:48,294
看来他真的应付不来啊
1572
01:25:50,762 --> 01:25:51,762
先躲起来
1573
01:25:55,228 --> 01:25:57,057
我走了！他的头太硬啊
1574
01:26:01,128 --> 01:26:03,060
还好没踏到玻璃
1575
01:26:13,261 --> 01:26:14,261
压死你
1576
01:26:23,228 --> 01:26:24,228
去死吧
1577
01:26:31,762 --> 01:26:34,091
不要冲动！公主，不要冲动呀
1578
01:26:34,128 --> 01:26:35,287
不要接着我
1579
01:26:35,495 --> 01:26:38,393
你出去后谁来保护皇后…和我呢？
1580
01:27:05,695 --> 01:27:06,695
了不起
1581
01:27:11,261 --> 01:27:12,955
不要…不要走出来啊
1582
01:27:17,028 --> 01:27:18,028
蹲下
1583
01:27:18,562 --> 01:27:19,220
蹲下
1584
01:27:19,428 --> 01:27:20,758
怎么样？要不要拔出来？
1585
01:27:21,228 --> 01:27:22,956
应该拔出来还是再插深一点？
1586
01:27:23,261 --> 01:27:24,261
扶着她吧
1587
01:27:40,829 --> 01:27:41,829
你们还没有走吗？
1588
01:27:43,228 --> 01:27:44,626
你不能去啊
1589
01:27:45,261 --> 01:27:46,887
你打不过他们的，快走吧
1590
01:27:47,328 --> 01:27:48,419
像只箭猪一样
1591
01:27:48,729 --> 01:27:49,729
快保护皇后逃啊
1592
01:27:49,762 --> 01:27:50,762
好的
1593
01:27:52,428 --> 01:27:54,485
我叫她们逃而已，没有叫你啊
1594
01:27:54,795 --> 01:27:55,920
我留在这儿没有作为啊
1595
01:27:56,935 --> 01:27:58,128
快叫我师父附在你身吧
1596
01:27:58,401 --> 01:27:59,458
齐天大圣急急如律令
1597
01:27:59,501 --> 01:28:00,592
不是这样子啊，看着办吧
1598
01:28:00,635 --> 01:28:02,760
床前明月眼长疮呀
1599
01:28:02,969 --> 01:28:05,128
床前明月眼长疮
1600
01:28:05,468 --> 01:28:05,866
怎么样？
1601
01:28:05,902 --> 01:28:06,663
没有效啊
1602
01:28:06,702 --> 01:28:07,963
你一定是念少了一个字了
1603
01:28:08,268 --> 01:28:09,461
从前明月眼长疮呀
1604
01:28:09,501 --> 01:28:10,762
是！
1605
01:28:11,135 --> 01:28:13,828
从前明月眼长疮呀！
1606
01:28:24,102 --> 01:28:25,008
行了吗
1607
01:28:25,033 --> 01:28:26,975
我不能再叫了，我不够气啊
1608
01:28:30,069 --> 01:28:31,466
行了吗
1609
01:28:32,668 --> 01:28:33,759
师父
1610
01:28:35,768 --> 01:28:37,199
师父你干嘛向上升呢？
1611
01:28:37,935 --> 01:28:41,992
师父，不是上面，是那边啊
1612
01:28:49,702 --> 01:28:51,327
幸亏师父及时赶到
1613
01:29:10,235 --> 01:29:11,235
打他吧，师父
1614
01:29:11,535 --> 01:29:13,831
你不用怕他，他打不过你的
1615
01:29:23,869 --> 01:29:26,062
师父，小心他的头呀
1616
01:29:29,835 --> 01:29:33,164
师父，干什么？
1617
01:29:36,435 --> 01:29:39,061
师父，干什么？
1618
01:29:41,702 --> 01:29:43,497
老公，师父呢？
1619
01:29:43,802 --> 01:29:44,358
师父飞得太快
1620
01:29:44,668 --> 01:29:45,759
我不知他飞到那儿去了
1621
01:29:52,802 --> 01:29:57,166
救命呀…救命呀
1622
01:30:11,235 --> 01:30:11,963
宝爷
1623
01:30:12,201 --> 01:30:13,201
师父
1624
01:30:13,501 --> 01:30:16,093
你叫我吗？我怎会做了你的师父呢？
1625
01:30:16,401 --> 01:30:17,594
快救我下来吧
1626
01:30:18,135 --> 01:30:20,293
不能救你呀！他在你后面啊
1627
01:30:34,035 --> 01:30:35,035
师父
1628
01:30:42,235 --> 01:30:44,599
他怕电的，快帮手拿电线
1629
01:30:57,268 --> 01:30:58,894
绑着他！不要让他动弹
1630
01:30:59,135 --> 01:31:00,135
每人拉一边
1631
01:31:10,301 --> 01:31:11,927
拉紧一点
1632
01:31:19,835 --> 01:31:21,028
电死你
1633
01:31:42,935 --> 01:31:43,935
大家没有伤亡吧？
1634
01:31:43,969 --> 01:31:44,969
没有，那就好了
1635
01:31:47,201 --> 01:31:49,724
原来古代人是怕电的！真没用
1636
01:31:50,468 --> 01:31:52,263
你不怕吗？
1637
01:31:53,869 --> 01:31:54,926
老公…
1638
01:31:55,268 --> 01:31:56,291
我有打算
1639
01:32:04,401 --> 01:32:06,663
老公，我这件衣服漂亮吗
1640
01:32:07,002 --> 01:32:08,365
你不要搞新玩意来吓我
1641
01:32:08,535 --> 01:32:09,160
性感吗
1642
01:32:09,335 --> 01:32:10,460
真棒
1643
01:32:12,335 --> 01:32:14,597
干杯！喝这么少怎行呢？
1644
01:32:14,869 --> 01:32:15,869
如果有假期的话
1645
01:32:16,235 --> 01:32:18,497
定要来现代探我们啊
1646
01:32:18,802 --> 01:32:19,426
如果死不了的话
1647
01:32:19,702 --> 01:32:20,827
我一定再来探望你们
1648
01:32:41,268 --> 01:32:42,268
早安
1649
01:32:46,135 --> 01:32:47,259
耍我吗
1650
01:32:47,668 --> 01:32:48,759
我还要泡妞啊
1651
01:32:49,468 --> 01:32:50,525
早安！
1652
01:32:53,268 --> 01:32:54,825
华叔，我们去敬酒吧
1653
01:32:59,035 --> 01:33:01,523
还玩这种小学的游戏
1654
01:33:04,568 --> 01:33:05,568
保重了
1655
01:33:05,602 --> 01:33:06,602
彼此彼此
1656
01:33:09,135 --> 01:33:09,862
银？
1657
01:33:10,069 --> 01:33:11,591
是呀！电镀的
1658
01:33:25,869 --> 01:33:27,266
你真的愿意跟我回去？
1659
01:33:27,969 --> 01:33:30,162
我去加拿大探我姐姐
1660
01:33:34,102 --> 01:33:35,192
好的
1661
01:33:37,468 --> 01:33:38,900
你为什么不愿跟我走呢？
1662
01:33:43,568 --> 01:33:45,000
不如你留下来吧
1663
01:33:52,002 --> 01:33:55,434
小霞满眼泪光啊，似乎是谈不拢
1664
01:33:55,869 --> 01:33:56,960
你保重
1665
01:33:58,455 --> 01:34:01,546
先别走，我有办法
1666
01:34:02,555 --> 01:34:04,180
有什么办法呢？
1667
01:34:04,689 --> 01:34:06,154
凭我九年的当差经验
1668
01:34:06,422 --> 01:34:08,013
办法只有一个，就是
1669
01:34:08,188 --> 01:34:09,188
大家帮忙想一想吧
1670
01:34:10,589 --> 01:34:11,589
去！
1671
01:34:12,188 --> 01:34:16,120
皇上，韦小宝有负圣旨，理该万死
1672
01:34:18,956 --> 01:34:22,319
枉我是九五之尊，竟然迷信误国
1673
01:34:22,655 --> 01:34:25,052
差点儿断送了大清江山
1674
01:34:26,322 --> 01:34:28,254
这本是三百年后的历史书
1675
01:34:28,789 --> 01:34:30,448
记载着我有六十岁命
1676
01:34:30,956 --> 01:34:32,216
还可中兴满清
1677
01:34:32,489 --> 01:34:33,921
我怎会听你一派胡言呢？
1678
01:34:34,155 --> 01:34:35,917
来人，将国师收押天牢
1679
01:34:35,956 --> 01:34:37,047
是
1680
01:34:37,222 --> 01:34:42,587
皇上！皇上饶命呀
1681
01:34:46,856 --> 01:34:50,219
你千万不要误会，虽然我多老婆
1682
01:34:50,422 --> 01:34:51,820
但这并不代表我不够专
1683
01:34:52,088 --> 01:34:54,145
这只是代表我感情丰富而已
1684
01:34:55,789 --> 01:34:57,982
你看看他们
1685
01:34:58,789 --> 01:35:01,687
真的很…爽啊
1686
01:35:02,322 --> 01:35:05,254
你用不着不好意思，我已习惯了
1687
01:35:05,555 --> 01:35:07,418
宝爷，你众多老婆之牛
1688
01:35:07,655 --> 01:35:08,985
最漂亮的要算是公主了
1689
01:35:09,222 --> 01:35:10,279
不知我能不能跟他
1690
01:35:10,589 --> 01:35:11,589
你自己去问她吧
1691
01:35:11,722 --> 01:35:12,779
真的？
1692
01:35:13,288 --> 01:35:15,880
来…来，让叔叔带着你们
1693
01:35:16,188 --> 01:35:17,188
我们可以一起上路吗？
1694
01:35:17,355 --> 01:35:18,150
可以！
1695
01:35:18,355 --> 01:35:19,651
介不介意我的手放在你肩膊上呢？
1696
01:35:19,689 --> 01:35:20,689
不介意
1697
01:35:20,822 --> 01:35:21,446
喜欢我泡你吗？
1698
01:35:21,655 --> 01:35:22,655
喜欢
1699
01:35:23,222 --> 01:35:24,586
她叫我放马过去啊
1700
01:35:25,522 --> 01:35:26,078
真的？
1701
01:35:26,355 --> 01:35:27,514
去死吧
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