Would you like to inspect the original subtitles? These are the user uploaded subtitles that are being translated:
1
00:00:03,908 --> 00:00:04,910
Hank, what are you doing?
2
00:00:05,010 --> 00:00:05,812
Uh... getting open?
3
00:00:05,979 --> 00:00:07,883
Nah nah, Hank.
You're the 'Roll' man, okay?
4
00:00:07,983 --> 00:00:09,319
You set the screen and then you
5
00:00:09,352 --> 00:00:10,922
roll to the basket
for the easy two.
6
00:00:11,055 --> 00:00:12,424
Oh. Okay. Got it, yeah.
7
00:00:13,426 --> 00:00:15,164
- Sorry, Mark.
- Damnit, Hank!
8
00:00:15,297 --> 00:00:17,301
Uhh... I think this play's
a little too complicated.
9
00:00:17,334 --> 00:00:20,073
Dude, the pick and roll is like
Basketball 101.
10
00:00:20,207 --> 00:00:21,977
Our fundamentals
gotta be air tight if we
11
00:00:22,077 --> 00:00:23,915
wanna have any chance
at winning this thing.
12
00:00:23,948 --> 00:00:25,483
Yeah, but it's a
charity tournament.
13
00:00:25,518 --> 00:00:26,352
Everybody wins.
14
00:00:26,452 --> 00:00:28,156
Yeah, but there's
only one team that
15
00:00:28,190 --> 00:00:30,193
gets their names
inscribed on a plaque.
16
00:00:30,294 --> 00:00:33,200
Yeah, it's just I don't know if
we're that good at basketball.
17
00:00:33,233 --> 00:00:34,335
Speak for yourself, Hank.
18
00:00:34,468 --> 00:00:37,007
I've been waking up
every day at 9 a.m.
19
00:00:37,041 --> 00:00:38,309
to do plyometrics.
20
00:00:38,476 --> 00:00:40,614
Oh, man, that's pretty early to
be setting off fireworks.
21
00:00:40,614 --> 00:00:43,320
Nah nah, Hank. Box jumps
to increase my vertical leap.
22
00:00:43,353 --> 00:00:45,057
I've been getting
pretty close to dunking.
23
00:00:45,190 --> 00:00:46,392
Watch this.
24
00:00:48,029 --> 00:00:50,467
Ooh-- ah, damn dude,
just missed it.
25
00:00:50,569 --> 00:00:52,605
Yo, check it out.
26
00:00:52,672 --> 00:00:54,008
It's Ground Jordan!
27
00:00:54,142 --> 00:00:55,377
You almost touched
the net there.
28
00:00:55,477 --> 00:00:57,315
Oh, please. Closer
than you'll ever get.
29
00:00:57,381 --> 00:00:58,984
I'm not delusional, Hoagies.
30
00:00:59,018 --> 00:01:00,622
I'm a playmaker.
Watch this.
31
00:01:00,689 --> 00:01:02,959
Woah. Steve's looking
pretty jacked there.
32
00:01:02,992 --> 00:01:04,228
Ah, nah, that ain't
natural, dude.
33
00:01:04,328 --> 00:01:05,831
He's definitely on steroids.
34
00:01:09,338 --> 00:01:10,809
You like that, Hoagies?
35
00:01:10,976 --> 00:01:13,313
Meet my nephew, Andrew.
- Sup.
36
00:01:13,346 --> 00:01:15,083
Yeah, Andrew here
averaged 20 and 10
37
00:01:15,183 --> 00:01:16,954
last season at
Camden Catholic.
38
00:01:17,121 --> 00:01:19,091
Impressive.
He also on the gear?
39
00:01:19,191 --> 00:01:20,661
- Excuse me?
- Oh, c'mon, dude.
40
00:01:20,661 --> 00:01:22,999
Look at your back-ne.
You're obviously juicing.
41
00:01:23,099 --> 00:01:24,837
Well, if you must know,
I'm on prednisone
42
00:01:24,870 --> 00:01:26,741
for ulcerative colitis.
43
00:01:27,074 --> 00:01:28,844
I can't help it if
the side-effect's
44
00:01:28,944 --> 00:01:30,715
me getting yoked
out of my skull.
45
00:01:30,882 --> 00:01:33,186
Get off, the court's ours.
46
00:01:34,155 --> 00:01:37,896
Boom! Haha!
All day, baby, all day.
47
00:01:38,029 --> 00:01:39,064
- What the hell?
- Whoa.
48
00:01:39,165 --> 00:01:40,433
We're gonna win
this frickin' thing,
49
00:01:40,535 --> 00:01:42,338
get our names up
on that plaque and the
50
00:01:42,371 --> 00:01:44,275
whole town is gonna
know that we are the
51
00:01:44,375 --> 00:01:46,781
ones who care most
about autism awareness.
52
00:01:47,014 --> 00:01:49,318
- Think fast!
- Ooh!
53
00:01:53,527 --> 00:01:56,567
♪ Well, I used to work
in hot dog factory ♪
54
00:01:56,601 --> 00:01:58,537
♪ until them
robots came along, ♪
55
00:01:58,571 --> 00:02:00,474
♪ and now there is no
job for me, ♪
56
00:02:00,575 --> 00:02:02,979
♪ but I get three thousand
bucks a month. ♪
57
00:02:03,013 --> 00:02:07,287
♪ Thanks to UBI.
58
00:02:07,321 --> 00:02:10,662
♪ Now we're Universal
Basic Guys. ♪
59
00:02:10,695 --> 00:02:15,672
♪ It may not sound like much,
but we're still gonna try. ♪
60
00:02:15,705 --> 00:02:20,413
♪ We're just Universal
Basic Guys. ♪
61
00:02:24,122 --> 00:02:26,760
Can you believe that? Steve's
juice out of his frickin' mind.
62
00:02:26,860 --> 00:02:28,897
Last year he air-balled
every three. Couldn't
63
00:02:28,931 --> 00:02:30,266
even reach the net,
and now he's
64
00:02:30,300 --> 00:02:31,336
bombing 'em from
half-court.
65
00:02:31,537 --> 00:02:33,975
So what, you lookin' for
steroids or something?
66
00:02:34,075 --> 00:02:35,578
I mean uh... I'd consider it...
67
00:02:35,612 --> 00:02:37,448
I dunno, Mark, that's cheating
68
00:02:37,481 --> 00:02:39,452
Hey, it's not cheating if it's
for a good cause.
69
00:02:39,485 --> 00:02:40,755
Yo Mernft, you hook me up?
70
00:02:40,855 --> 00:02:43,326
Absolutely I can, but uh,
as your friend.
71
00:02:43,359 --> 00:02:44,529
I wouldn't recommend it.
72
00:02:44,629 --> 00:02:46,465
Yeah, Mark. Steriods
are dangerous.
73
00:02:46,499 --> 00:02:49,338
Well uh, more importantly,
they won't work fast enough.
74
00:02:49,439 --> 00:02:51,342
Plus you gotta y'know...
lift weights.
75
00:02:51,442 --> 00:02:53,446
Ugh, man. Well then how
the hell are we gonna
76
00:02:53,479 --> 00:02:56,352
beat Hulk DelVecchio
and that freak nephew his?
77
00:02:56,452 --> 00:02:58,925
Oh, my God. Oh, my God.
Mark! Help!
78
00:02:59,359 --> 00:03:01,195
Yo, you alright Tam?
What's going on?!
79
00:03:01,229 --> 00:03:02,330
Raccoon!
80
00:03:02,765 --> 00:03:04,468
- Oh, damn!
- Hey there, little guy.
81
00:03:04,570 --> 00:03:06,807
Careful, Hank.
I think it's got rabies.
82
00:03:07,007 --> 00:03:08,443
Whoa...
83
00:03:09,211 --> 00:03:10,347
Damnit!
84
00:03:10,380 --> 00:03:12,852
Uh-uh. No, no, no.
Nope.
85
00:03:13,988 --> 00:03:15,758
Wow. So brave, Mark.
86
00:03:15,858 --> 00:03:17,094
Yeah, just need a minute.
87
00:03:17,394 --> 00:03:18,864
Shoo, get outta here!
88
00:03:18,998 --> 00:03:21,503
Come here you stupid-
Ugh! Ahh!
89
00:03:21,537 --> 00:03:23,708
Mark! Would you help me here!
90
00:03:24,075 --> 00:03:25,945
Damn, dude. This
thing is fast as hell.
91
00:03:27,047 --> 00:03:28,718
Uh-oh.
92
00:03:29,285 --> 00:03:30,722
Yo, where is he?
Where'd he go?
93
00:03:30,755 --> 00:03:32,826
Hey, yo. There's a
raccoon in the garage.
94
00:03:32,926 --> 00:03:34,095
Oh, thanks, Mernft.
95
00:03:34,161 --> 00:03:35,698
Ay, get out of here, dude!
Get!
96
00:03:38,436 --> 00:03:40,841
Ah! Damn, dude.
Thing just broke my ankles.
97
00:03:42,378 --> 00:03:43,714
C'mon!
Oww!!!
98
00:03:44,281 --> 00:03:45,751
Yo, raccoon!
99
00:03:47,955 --> 00:03:51,229
Alright, that's it. No more
messing around, bud.
100
00:03:51,663 --> 00:03:53,901
- Oh, geez.
- Oh, crap.
101
00:03:56,039 --> 00:03:59,244
Ahhh!
Say hello to my arrows!
102
00:04:07,695 --> 00:04:10,033
Damn! You see that?!
Thing jump like ten feet.
103
00:04:10,133 --> 00:04:11,302
Oh yeah, that ain't natural.
104
00:04:11,570 --> 00:04:13,907
Apparently, there's some new
rabies variant going around.
105
00:04:14,041 --> 00:04:15,544
Animals go berserk for a couple
106
00:04:15,544 --> 00:04:17,180
weeks before to
get sick and die.
107
00:04:17,314 --> 00:04:18,750
Aw. That's sad.
108
00:04:19,285 --> 00:04:20,487
Hmm...
109
00:04:23,594 --> 00:04:26,466
Hey, Mark. What
am I looking at here?
110
00:04:26,567 --> 00:04:28,303
Shh, yo. Keep your voice
down Jinglebells,
111
00:04:28,303 --> 00:04:30,207
I'm trying to get rabies.
- I see.
112
00:04:30,274 --> 00:04:31,943
Uh, you know rabies is deadly.
113
00:04:31,977 --> 00:04:34,716
Yeah sometimes, okay. But that's
a risk I'm willing to take.
114
00:04:34,750 --> 00:04:36,419
May I ask... why?
115
00:04:36,520 --> 00:04:38,256
Ugh. I'm trying to win a
two-on-two charity
116
00:04:38,290 --> 00:04:39,593
basketball tournament, alright?
117
00:04:39,626 --> 00:04:41,496
Ooh, there's a charity
basketball tournament?
118
00:04:41,597 --> 00:04:43,601
Hey, can I get involved?
- You play basketball?
119
00:04:43,634 --> 00:04:45,638
Not since camp.
But I love associating
120
00:04:45,738 --> 00:04:48,376
with charities, especially when
I don't have to
121
00:04:48,476 --> 00:04:50,515
really do anything.
Do they give out t-shirts?
122
00:04:50,615 --> 00:04:52,450
- Uh, probably?
- Oh, sweet.
123
00:04:52,484 --> 00:04:53,286
Alright. I'm in.
124
00:04:53,486 --> 00:04:55,123
Do you know anyone who's looking
for a partner?
125
00:04:55,157 --> 00:04:57,361
No, but can you just get
out of here? Your dog's licking
126
00:04:57,461 --> 00:04:59,031
off all my peanut butter.
- Oh, sorry.
127
00:04:59,231 --> 00:05:00,066
Mimi, let's go.
C'mon.
128
00:05:00,333 --> 00:05:02,772
You could do PB finger-lickies
at home with daddy.
129
00:05:08,316 --> 00:05:10,420
Oh... Here we go.
130
00:05:16,933 --> 00:05:18,504
Yeah get it, dude.
131
00:05:19,205 --> 00:05:20,775
Ah! There you go.
Ow--ow. Ow, yo.
132
00:05:20,808 --> 00:05:24,983
A little too hard there, bud--
Ow! Ow! Owwww!!!
133
00:05:26,753 --> 00:05:28,857
♪ [alarm]
134
00:05:28,957 --> 00:05:31,128
Hmm.
Ugh.
135
00:05:32,197 --> 00:05:33,600
Wait, what?
136
00:05:33,700 --> 00:05:34,669
Yo...
137
00:05:34,936 --> 00:05:37,407
Mmm.
Mmm.
138
00:05:38,777 --> 00:05:40,714
Yooo....
139
00:05:41,517 --> 00:05:43,854
- Hey, hun.
- Yo, Tam.
140
00:05:46,626 --> 00:05:49,364
Uh... haha, how about
we use a glass?
141
00:05:49,833 --> 00:05:51,235
Ahh, c'mere you...
142
00:05:51,269 --> 00:05:52,572
I got ya, babe.
143
00:05:53,039 --> 00:05:54,408
Oh! Thanks, hun.
144
00:05:54,842 --> 00:05:58,984
Ooooh, Mark.
Down, boy. Relax.
145
00:05:59,051 --> 00:06:03,159
I'll relax when the whole world
is aware of autism, baby.
146
00:06:03,728 --> 00:06:04,762
Oh! Haha.
147
00:06:10,374 --> 00:06:12,912
Uhh, you okay, Mark? Uh.
Your eyes are kinda red.
148
00:06:13,013 --> 00:06:15,952
Hoho I'm more than okay, dude,
I feel great. I'm thriving!
149
00:06:16,085 --> 00:06:19,124
Getting rabies is the best
idea ever had. Watch this.
150
00:06:19,726 --> 00:06:20,661
Boom!
151
00:06:20,795 --> 00:06:22,532
Already doubled
my box jump record.
152
00:06:22,565 --> 00:06:23,634
You sure this is worth it?
153
00:06:23,700 --> 00:06:25,704
Yes, Hank.
Rabies is temporary,
154
00:06:25,804 --> 00:06:28,342
but plaques in the
gym, they hang forever.
155
00:06:28,677 --> 00:06:30,413
Oh, man. I can't
wait to see the look on
156
00:06:30,446 --> 00:06:32,418
Steve's face when I
dunk it right on his head.
157
00:06:32,552 --> 00:06:34,421
I'm gonna put that
dude on a poster.
158
00:06:34,589 --> 00:06:36,793
Oh, yeah.
Ooh, give me tho--
159
00:06:37,227 --> 00:06:38,798
Yo, want any of
these eggs, dude?
160
00:06:39,065 --> 00:06:40,167
Uh, I'm good.
161
00:06:40,300 --> 00:06:41,302
Ohh, yeah, dude. Hoo!
162
00:06:41,402 --> 00:06:42,939
I can feel those
eggs going right
163
00:06:42,973 --> 00:06:44,943
into my body,
right into my muscles,
164
00:06:44,977 --> 00:06:46,747
oh yeah, building strength
with each bite.
165
00:06:46,847 --> 00:06:49,085
I'm not so sure how I feel
about this whole rabies thing.
166
00:06:49,185 --> 00:06:51,590
Okay and how the hell else are
we gonna beat DelVecchio?
167
00:06:51,623 --> 00:06:53,426
I mean, um we could
always... practice.
168
00:06:53,459 --> 00:06:54,996
Hmm. Alright yeah,
that's a good point.
169
00:06:55,130 --> 00:06:57,602
Why don't you get out there
and start putting up some shots.
170
00:06:57,669 --> 00:06:58,837
I need you money
from downtown.
171
00:06:58,937 --> 00:07:00,173
I'm just not a great
shooter, though.
172
00:07:00,206 --> 00:07:03,514
Well not yet. But you just gotta
do the Malcolm Gladwell thing
173
00:07:03,581 --> 00:07:05,685
were you shoot like 10,000
three-pointers or whatever.
174
00:07:05,718 --> 00:07:07,788
Hmm. Okay yeah, sounds good.
175
00:07:11,395 --> 00:07:13,266
Hey, Hanky Panky,
there's my guy.
176
00:07:13,366 --> 00:07:14,736
You need a teammate
for the tournament?
177
00:07:14,869 --> 00:07:16,405
Nah. I'm actually
playing with Mark.
178
00:07:16,439 --> 00:07:17,875
Ah. Duh. Ugh.
179
00:07:17,909 --> 00:07:21,750
Alright, so how does one go
about finding a B-Ball partner?
180
00:07:21,850 --> 00:07:23,486
Is there like an
app or something?
181
00:07:23,621 --> 00:07:26,125
Mm uh, maybe
just ask around?
182
00:07:26,192 --> 00:07:27,662
Ugh. So awkward.
183
00:07:27,762 --> 00:07:29,799
I'm just gonna give up.
184
00:07:30,367 --> 00:07:32,004
Ooh, God. Look at that.
185
00:07:32,204 --> 00:07:34,074
Is that pre-shrunk cotton?
186
00:07:34,341 --> 00:07:36,513
Ooh, it's so boxy
and cheap looking.
187
00:07:36,613 --> 00:07:38,884
That's the perfect
charity shirt.
188
00:07:39,085 --> 00:07:40,219
Ah, you know what?
189
00:07:40,386 --> 00:07:42,090
Maybe I will ask around.
190
00:07:44,730 --> 00:07:47,367
Yo! You see that?
I'm getting close, baby.
191
00:07:47,400 --> 00:07:48,537
A few more of these
and I'm gonna be
192
00:07:48,570 --> 00:07:51,375
tomahawking on DelVecchio
like frickin' Anthony Edwards.
193
00:07:51,442 --> 00:07:53,279
Raaaagh!!!
- What gives, Hoagies?
194
00:07:53,313 --> 00:07:55,785
- You're looking awfully spry.
- Yeah, that's right, dude.
195
00:07:55,885 --> 00:07:58,056
- You scared?
- No. Suspicious.
196
00:07:58,089 --> 00:08:00,594
Yesterday you were loafing
around like a sack of garbage,
197
00:08:00,628 --> 00:08:02,665
now you're grabbing rim?
You're on somethin'.
198
00:08:02,799 --> 00:08:05,002
Pfft, what are you talking
about, dude. I'm 100% natty.
199
00:08:05,036 --> 00:08:06,506
The only one on
the juice is you.
200
00:08:06,673 --> 00:08:09,111
I already told you. I'm taking
doctor prescribed steroids
201
00:08:09,145 --> 00:08:10,548
for psoriasis.
202
00:08:10,581 --> 00:08:12,552
Oh yeah? I thought it was uh,
ulcerative colitis.
203
00:08:12,586 --> 00:08:13,621
Might wanna get
your story straight.
204
00:08:13,721 --> 00:08:16,259
Oh, cry more, Hoagies.
You wanna see a doctor's note?
205
00:08:16,359 --> 00:08:17,428
Oh, yeah, from who?
206
00:08:17,461 --> 00:08:18,964
Dr. uh, Barry Bonds?
207
00:08:19,064 --> 00:08:21,436
Oh okay, funny guy.
You know what?
208
00:08:21,570 --> 00:08:22,805
I am taking steroids.
209
00:08:22,905 --> 00:08:24,776
I'm stacking a
cocktail of full-on
210
00:08:24,876 --> 00:08:27,047
anabolic, Hulk Hogan
gym candies.
211
00:08:27,080 --> 00:08:29,284
And do you know why?
- 'Cause you're a cheater?
212
00:08:29,385 --> 00:08:31,422
No! Because I'm
willing to sacrifice
213
00:08:31,456 --> 00:08:33,426
my long term health for charity.
214
00:08:33,459 --> 00:08:35,197
That's why.
I'm gonna put on a show.
215
00:08:35,330 --> 00:08:38,002
- You're all talk, little man.
- Oh yeah? All talk?
216
00:08:38,102 --> 00:08:40,173
I'll knock that thumb head
off your shoulders.
217
00:08:40,273 --> 00:08:41,308
Pfft. You don't scare me.
218
00:08:41,342 --> 00:08:43,513
The only thing I'm afraid
of are those hair plugs
219
00:08:43,547 --> 00:08:45,183
scraping my boys when
I dunk on your head.
220
00:08:45,217 --> 00:08:47,922
Oh okay, guys. We're all just
here to have fun.
221
00:08:48,858 --> 00:08:51,295
Oh my God, I got a puppy
that's stronger than this.
222
00:08:51,328 --> 00:08:52,632
Alright, guys.
Take it easy.
223
00:08:52,732 --> 00:08:54,301
Kick his ass, Uncle Steve!
224
00:08:54,401 --> 00:08:55,537
Gah!
225
00:08:55,738 --> 00:08:58,276
Did you just bite me?
D- Did you see that?
226
00:08:58,309 --> 00:08:59,779
He's freakin' 'roid raging!
227
00:08:59,879 --> 00:09:01,014
Uh...
228
00:09:03,721 --> 00:09:05,089
The hell happened to you?
229
00:09:05,122 --> 00:09:08,262
Oh nothin', just uh...
ballin' out, hoopin' you know.
230
00:09:08,296 --> 00:09:11,201
Geez. Seems a little intense
for a charity game.
231
00:09:14,576 --> 00:09:16,880
Ugh. You're like an
animal right now.
232
00:09:18,449 --> 00:09:20,654
You look like you
wanna devour me.
233
00:09:21,222 --> 00:09:22,658
Maybe I do.
234
00:09:30,741 --> 00:09:33,312
H-Hey, how's the weather
up there? Heheheheh.
235
00:09:35,483 --> 00:09:37,622
So actually um,
I'm on the hunt for
236
00:09:37,722 --> 00:09:40,493
a teammate for the tournament.
What do you say?
237
00:09:40,527 --> 00:09:42,196
Uhh... What tournament?
238
00:09:42,497 --> 00:09:44,201
Basketball. Duh.
239
00:09:44,301 --> 00:09:47,307
Oh, just because I'm tall,
I must play basketball?
240
00:09:47,341 --> 00:09:50,614
Oh my gosh no, I'm so sorry.
I- I did not mean to insinuate--
241
00:09:50,714 --> 00:09:52,885
What? That because I
have a certain body type,
242
00:09:53,019 --> 00:09:54,722
I must have certain interests.
243
00:09:54,756 --> 00:09:57,261
No-- I wasn't-- Oh my gosh--
Are you tall?
244
00:09:57,361 --> 00:09:59,065
Hmm.
I didn't even realize.
245
00:09:59,198 --> 00:10:01,302
I'm just asking
everybody really... Heheh...
246
00:10:01,402 --> 00:10:02,471
Hey uh sir, hi.
247
00:10:02,505 --> 00:10:03,941
Would you be
interested in being my
248
00:10:04,041 --> 00:10:05,777
partner for the uh...
the basketball thing?
249
00:10:05,878 --> 00:10:07,615
- Hell yeah, bro.
- Okay, no problem.
250
00:10:07,682 --> 00:10:09,485
I just thought I'd ask-
-wait, what?
251
00:10:09,519 --> 00:10:11,022
Did you just... You do?
252
00:10:11,055 --> 00:10:13,627
Yeah, man. Let's do it.
I'm Ronnie.
253
00:10:13,794 --> 00:10:15,263
Alright. David.
254
00:10:19,138 --> 00:10:21,509
Uh... are you okay?
255
00:10:21,543 --> 00:10:22,645
Huh?
What?
256
00:10:22,678 --> 00:10:25,518
Uh... yeah... uh... maybe...
257
00:10:25,551 --> 00:10:27,120
Can I get another nurse?
258
00:10:27,922 --> 00:10:32,163
Sorry. Um... yeah. Let me uh...
excuse me for just one second.
259
00:10:33,667 --> 00:10:34,936
Jasmine!
260
00:10:35,069 --> 00:10:37,775
Tammy?! Uh... Didja
have a rough night?
261
00:10:37,909 --> 00:10:39,946
Yeah look-- I'm not
feeling so hot.
262
00:10:39,979 --> 00:10:42,551
Would you mind doing
an IV swap in 318?
263
00:10:42,918 --> 00:10:44,622
I'm gonna pop in
an ER for a bite...
264
00:10:44,656 --> 00:10:46,092
I mean uh... exam.
265
00:10:46,125 --> 00:10:48,262
- Uh- Of course.
- Thanks, hun.
266
00:10:51,169 --> 00:10:52,370
Oof. Damn!
267
00:10:52,705 --> 00:10:54,709
Whoops. Heh.
Forgot to uh...
268
00:10:54,742 --> 00:10:56,278
Heheheh...
269
00:10:56,613 --> 00:10:59,050
The hells is wrong with her?
Whoops?
270
00:11:02,090 --> 00:11:04,595
Hey Hank. Uh, mind if we
share the court with you?
271
00:11:04,695 --> 00:11:07,267
Oh hey there, David.
Did ya uh, find a partner?
272
00:11:07,300 --> 00:11:08,570
I did. Yes.
273
00:11:08,603 --> 00:11:10,674
Oh. Cool. Yeah. I love
wheels and chairs.
274
00:11:10,774 --> 00:11:12,410
Get off our court, bro.
275
00:11:12,443 --> 00:11:14,114
Uh... okay?
276
00:11:14,782 --> 00:11:18,055
Alright, J-Bells.
Let's see what you got.
277
00:11:18,557 --> 00:11:19,693
Oof!
278
00:11:19,860 --> 00:11:22,464
C'mon butterfingers.
Gotta catch that.
279
00:11:22,565 --> 00:11:24,569
What?
Was that even a pass?
280
00:11:24,602 --> 00:11:26,171
Yeah man.
You gotta move off-ball.
281
00:11:26,238 --> 00:11:29,311
I was trying to hit
you in stride
282
00:11:29,411 --> 00:11:30,247
Uh... right.
283
00:11:30,347 --> 00:11:34,220
Get the ball! Let's go.
Show some hustle.
284
00:11:34,321 --> 00:11:36,125
Oh uh. Here ya go.
285
00:11:36,325 --> 00:11:38,062
Kobe!
286
00:11:40,200 --> 00:11:42,136
Oh no.
287
00:11:46,947 --> 00:11:49,752
Hey Mark uh, I got up 900
shots today.
288
00:11:49,852 --> 00:11:52,056
I really think I'm starting
to find my rhythm.
289
00:11:53,326 --> 00:11:54,261
Uh, Mark?
290
00:11:54,529 --> 00:11:58,737
Yo. I was jjjjust-- practicing.
Iiii- make big jumps now.
291
00:11:58,770 --> 00:12:01,709
Oh... Uh... you're kinda
scaring me, Mark.
292
00:12:01,743 --> 00:12:03,146
Maybe it's time to get the cure.
293
00:12:03,179 --> 00:12:06,753
Can't... Uh basketballs...
it's t'game soons.
294
00:12:06,787 --> 00:12:08,022
Steve bad. I dunk.
295
00:12:08,055 --> 00:12:10,994
Yeah it's just... uh...
you seem pretty sick.
296
00:12:12,598 --> 00:12:14,267
Alright I'm sorry
you're worried.
297
00:12:14,936 --> 00:12:17,841
But I'm okay. I'm good.
Seriously.
298
00:12:18,911 --> 00:12:20,313
Okay, so here's the thing...
299
00:12:21,917 --> 00:12:23,921
I kinda bit Steve, uhh...
which means
300
00:12:24,021 --> 00:12:25,423
he's probably got rabies too.
301
00:12:25,457 --> 00:12:28,162
So now, y'know, they got rabies
plus steroids.
302
00:12:28,229 --> 00:12:31,168
So I was thinking... y'know...
you gotta get rabies too.
303
00:12:31,202 --> 00:12:33,039
Uh... I don't really
want rabies.
304
00:12:33,172 --> 00:12:36,412
Hank I'm telling you, okay,
it's awesome--
305
00:12:36,780 --> 00:12:38,550
You saw it dude,
I almost dunked!
306
00:12:38,584 --> 00:12:40,419
Come on, dude.
For charity.
307
00:12:41,289 --> 00:12:42,090
C'mere...
- Uh...
308
00:12:42,223 --> 00:12:43,927
C'mon, dude,
just one little bite,
309
00:12:43,960 --> 00:12:46,833
we kick Steve's ass, and then
we get the sssshot.
310
00:12:46,967 --> 00:12:48,002
Okay, no big deal.
311
00:12:48,102 --> 00:12:51,308
- Mark!
- Hey babe, how day?
312
00:12:51,509 --> 00:12:53,313
How day was?
How was your day?
313
00:12:53,379 --> 00:12:54,180
How was your day, babe?
314
00:12:54,314 --> 00:12:57,220
Oh, not great.
Apparently, I got rabies.
315
00:12:57,320 --> 00:13:00,159
Oh... um... wow...
That's... from a raccoon, um..?
316
00:13:00,192 --> 00:13:03,165
Um... don't think so.
Pretty sure I got it from you.
317
00:13:03,199 --> 00:13:06,438
Pfft, me. Nah, c'mon.
I'm totally normal health.
318
00:13:06,572 --> 00:13:08,142
You're foaming at the mouth.
319
00:13:08,175 --> 00:13:09,311
No no no--
320
00:13:09,445 --> 00:13:10,714
Hold still, Mark.
321
00:13:10,915 --> 00:13:13,018
What are you doing, Tam...
Nnnno. No.
322
00:13:19,965 --> 00:13:21,603
Mark. You're gonna need to take
323
00:13:21,703 --> 00:13:23,674
this shot now or
you're gonna die.
324
00:13:23,774 --> 00:13:25,811
Nah. What are you're
talking about? I'm good.
325
00:13:26,011 --> 00:13:27,715
Just like, uh... dehydrated.
326
00:13:27,815 --> 00:13:29,084
Oh, that's interesting.
327
00:13:29,117 --> 00:13:31,723
Because people with rabies
are afraid of water.
328
00:13:31,856 --> 00:13:33,259
Uhhhh wwwwhat are
you doing?
329
00:13:33,359 --> 00:13:36,398
Water. Y'know since you're
just dehydrated.
330
00:13:37,568 --> 00:13:39,304
Okay.
Hmmhmmhmmh sure.
331
00:13:39,405 --> 00:13:41,074
Sure. No problem.
332
00:13:50,426 --> 00:13:51,562
See, I knew it.
333
00:13:51,629 --> 00:13:54,869
Mark! Did you know you had
rabies when we... y'know?
334
00:13:54,903 --> 00:13:56,974
I dunno. Hnn- I didn't know
I even had it, yooo..?
335
00:13:57,007 --> 00:13:58,944
Wait, I thought you said you
got it on purpose
336
00:13:58,977 --> 00:14:01,348
so you could dunk on Steve.
- Damnit Hank, c'mon!
337
00:14:01,448 --> 00:14:02,283
You what?
338
00:14:02,317 --> 00:14:04,021
DelVecchio-- taking
steroids, okay?
339
00:14:04,121 --> 00:14:06,024
His nephew make
dddouble doubles.
340
00:14:06,058 --> 00:14:09,164
I need super power to bb-beat
him at basketball, okay?
341
00:14:09,264 --> 00:14:11,201
So you got frickin rabies?!
342
00:14:11,268 --> 00:14:14,141
Tam, just let me playthegame!
After that, I'll get the shot.
343
00:14:14,174 --> 00:14:16,278
Oh my God. Do you
have a death wish?
344
00:14:16,379 --> 00:14:19,819
This is bigger than me, Tam.
This is about autismm awareness.
345
00:14:19,919 --> 00:14:21,021
What are you talking about?
346
00:14:21,055 --> 00:14:21,857
Hnn-- Exactly.
347
00:14:21,990 --> 00:14:23,593
This is why we need
to spread awareness.
348
00:14:23,693 --> 00:14:25,931
Mark, uh, I really think you
should take the shot.
349
00:14:26,164 --> 00:14:27,400
N-n-n-
Stay back...
350
00:14:27,500 --> 00:14:28,469
- Now!
- Oof!
351
00:14:30,807 --> 00:14:32,544
- Uh oh.
352
00:14:36,385 --> 00:14:37,287
Look, we gotta act fast.
353
00:14:37,555 --> 00:14:39,692
I don't know how much time
he has before it's too late.
354
00:14:39,759 --> 00:14:41,361
Oh, geez.
Mark!
355
00:14:41,562 --> 00:14:43,065
Mark! Where are you?!
356
00:14:43,199 --> 00:14:44,736
I think we should
split up, Hank.
357
00:14:44,769 --> 00:14:46,539
I'll go this way.
You go that way.
358
00:14:46,539 --> 00:14:47,941
Uh... okay.
359
00:14:48,309 --> 00:14:49,210
Mark!
360
00:14:49,477 --> 00:14:51,983
Oh come on, idiot.
Where'd you go?
361
00:14:52,785 --> 00:14:53,987
Mark!
362
00:14:54,388 --> 00:14:55,422
Hey, Mark!
363
00:14:55,825 --> 00:14:57,293
Ma--
364
00:15:00,333 --> 00:15:01,301
Mark?
365
00:15:04,141 --> 00:15:05,242
[gasp]
366
00:15:08,650 --> 00:15:09,819
Oh. Geez...
367
00:15:09,919 --> 00:15:12,390
Wake up, man.
Let's go.
368
00:15:15,062 --> 00:15:16,533
Dude. Come on!
369
00:15:16,599 --> 00:15:19,839
I'm dropping dimes. And your
conditioning is pathetic.
370
00:15:20,039 --> 00:15:21,710
Have you ever done
cardio in your life?
371
00:15:21,710 --> 00:15:22,811
Are you kidding me?!
372
00:15:22,811 --> 00:15:24,281
I've been running
around all day while
373
00:15:24,381 --> 00:15:26,185
you've been sitting
in a frickin' chair.
374
00:15:26,318 --> 00:15:27,120
Wow, man.
375
00:15:27,220 --> 00:15:29,091
Listen, I don't
think this is working.
376
00:15:29,124 --> 00:15:30,259
What are you talking about?
377
00:15:30,293 --> 00:15:31,662
I don't want to play with you.
378
00:15:31,696 --> 00:15:33,232
Oh? Because I'm in a wheelchair?
379
00:15:33,465 --> 00:15:35,370
No, because you're
not a very nice person.
380
00:15:35,403 --> 00:15:37,875
Damn. You're
softer than you look.
381
00:15:38,075 --> 00:15:39,377
I knew you were a scrub.
382
00:15:39,410 --> 00:15:40,379
Excuse me?!
383
00:15:40,479 --> 00:15:42,751
You haven't made a
single decent pass and
384
00:15:42,852 --> 00:15:44,722
you're like 0 for 50
from the field.
385
00:15:44,822 --> 00:15:47,293
You're the scrub.
You suck!
386
00:15:47,528 --> 00:15:51,101
[silence]
387
00:15:53,106 --> 00:15:54,876
Uh... what was that about?
388
00:15:54,876 --> 00:15:55,678
I can't play with him.
389
00:15:55,778 --> 00:15:57,881
He's a jerk and he
sucks at basketball.
390
00:15:57,981 --> 00:16:00,420
Optics, David.
It's a charity tournament.
391
00:16:00,521 --> 00:16:03,493
Let's try to remember what
this is really about, okay?
392
00:16:03,727 --> 00:16:05,531
[sigh]
You're right.
393
00:16:06,031 --> 00:16:08,001
Hey uh, Ronnie, wait.
394
00:16:08,870 --> 00:16:10,674
- What do you want?
- I'm sorry.
395
00:16:10,707 --> 00:16:11,976
I shouldn't have said that.
396
00:16:12,010 --> 00:16:13,312
Nah, I do suck.
397
00:16:13,379 --> 00:16:15,985
It's just nobody has the
balls to say it to me.
398
00:16:16,018 --> 00:16:18,022
Respect.
You suck too.
399
00:16:18,122 --> 00:16:19,892
Alright, let's give
this another go.
400
00:16:19,926 --> 00:16:21,495
I think we can win this thing.
401
00:16:21,596 --> 00:16:22,631
You really think so?
402
00:16:22,765 --> 00:16:24,034
No, I don't. Haha.
403
00:16:24,034 --> 00:16:25,336
Let's do it.
404
00:16:27,040 --> 00:16:29,178
I gotta say, losing
by 60 points in a
405
00:16:29,244 --> 00:16:31,883
20 minute game is
genuinely impressive.
406
00:16:31,916 --> 00:16:34,655
Yeah, oh well.
T-shirt time!
407
00:16:35,189 --> 00:16:37,126
Oh, come on! XXL!
408
00:16:37,460 --> 00:16:39,198
What's the point
in giving out charity
409
00:16:39,298 --> 00:16:41,001
t-shirts if you can
only wear them to bed?
410
00:16:41,035 --> 00:16:42,303
That's ridiculous.
411
00:16:42,505 --> 00:16:45,376
Mark, can you please come down
so I can give you the medicine?
412
00:16:46,880 --> 00:16:48,650
Alright, I'm coming up.
413
00:16:52,323 --> 00:16:54,061
Okay, Mark. I'm not
gonna hurt you...
414
00:16:54,094 --> 00:16:56,097
I just-- I don't want
you to die and stuff.
415
00:16:56,198 --> 00:16:58,302
Hank, j-j-j-just hear
me out, okay?
416
00:16:58,435 --> 00:16:59,939
Don't-don't-don't
do this, okay?
417
00:16:59,973 --> 00:17:01,208
I know it seems
crazy how much I care
418
00:17:01,241 --> 00:17:04,181
about beating DelVecchio, b-b-
but it really means a lot to me.
419
00:17:04,281 --> 00:17:06,285
I'm asking you, uh p-p-
please, if you do me
420
00:17:06,318 --> 00:17:08,957
one favor for the rest
of our lives, let it be this.
421
00:17:08,991 --> 00:17:12,965
I j-j-just want to play in that
basketball game with rabies.
422
00:17:13,032 --> 00:17:15,637
Hokay, not just to
beat DelVecchio, but
423
00:17:15,671 --> 00:17:18,843
for me, it's my one
chance to dunk on him
424
00:17:18,910 --> 00:17:20,380
and it's n-n-never
gonna happen again.
425
00:17:20,480 --> 00:17:23,452
I promise as soon as the game's
over, I'll take the s-s-shot.
426
00:17:25,056 --> 00:17:27,493
From the Glantontown
Community Center
427
00:17:27,561 --> 00:17:30,333
in South Jersey,
it's time for the
428
00:17:30,366 --> 00:17:33,439
championship finals
of Spectrum...
429
00:17:33,540 --> 00:17:35,443
Slam!
430
00:17:35,476 --> 00:17:38,148
Tonight, the
much anticipated matchup
431
00:17:38,248 --> 00:17:41,121
between Team DelVecchio
and Team Hoagies.
432
00:17:41,221 --> 00:17:44,595
Alright everybody...
Let's play some basketball!
433
00:17:46,866 --> 00:17:48,536
- Hank!
- Here, Mark!
434
00:17:48,836 --> 00:17:49,839
Gimme that!
435
00:17:50,073 --> 00:17:51,676
Yep! There you go!
436
00:17:51,843 --> 00:17:53,746
Ha, ha, ha, ho!
437
00:17:54,682 --> 00:17:55,550
Woo!
438
00:17:55,650 --> 00:17:57,822
C'mon, baby,
show me what you got!
439
00:17:57,922 --> 00:18:00,928
♪ [action] ♪
440
00:18:00,961 --> 00:18:02,196
Hank!
441
00:18:05,804 --> 00:18:06,872
Nice one, dude.
442
00:18:15,423 --> 00:18:17,728
Check your eyes, ref! C'mon!
443
00:18:25,677 --> 00:18:27,213
We got this, Mark.
444
00:18:32,891 --> 00:18:36,364
♪ [tense]
445
00:18:37,000 --> 00:18:39,237
[crack]
446
00:18:46,485 --> 00:18:48,590
[buzz]
447
00:18:48,690 --> 00:18:50,994
Wow, Mark! That was the
best dunk I've ever seen!
448
00:18:51,028 --> 00:18:52,898
This couldn't get any worse...
449
00:18:54,468 --> 00:18:57,239
Are you not entertained?!
450
00:18:58,644 --> 00:19:01,849
Are you not aware?!
451
00:19:03,085 --> 00:19:08,930
Together let's foster a better
understanding and acceptance of
452
00:19:08,930 --> 00:19:12,337
autistic individuals in society.
453
00:19:12,437 --> 00:19:14,642
Hoa-gies, hoa-gies,
hoa-gies, hoa-gies...
454
00:19:14,742 --> 00:19:17,848
Hoa-gies, hoa-gies,
hoa-gies, hoa-gies...
455
00:19:17,914 --> 00:19:18,850
Hoa-gies...
456
00:19:21,890 --> 00:19:24,060
- Hey, Tammy! He's waking up.
- Oh, my God.
457
00:19:24,160 --> 00:19:26,031
Mark?! Honey!
Can you hear me?
458
00:19:26,197 --> 00:19:28,537
We did it, Hank.
We did it.
459
00:19:28,637 --> 00:19:30,907
You're a lucky man, Mr. Hoagies.
460
00:19:31,007 --> 00:19:33,079
Hn- Thanks, Doc.
You see the game?
461
00:19:33,212 --> 00:19:34,247
Uh... No.
462
00:19:34,447 --> 00:19:37,186
And don't thank me.
Thank your brother.
463
00:19:37,387 --> 00:19:39,091
You wouldn't be
alive right now if he
464
00:19:39,124 --> 00:19:41,094
hadn't given you
that shot in the woods.
465
00:19:41,194 --> 00:19:43,098
Wait... hold on.
In the woods?
466
00:19:43,198 --> 00:19:45,136
But we... I just won.
I dunked on Steve.
467
00:19:45,203 --> 00:19:46,806
Everybody cheered.
- Sorry, Mark.
468
00:19:46,806 --> 00:19:48,342
I just...uh, you know.
469
00:19:48,375 --> 00:19:51,214
Wait so... I didn't dunk on...
we didn't win?
470
00:19:51,983 --> 00:19:53,119
Ugh. Damnit, Hank!
471
00:19:53,152 --> 00:19:54,622
Hun, I think you
should get some rest.
472
00:19:54,655 --> 00:19:58,195
You got severe encephalitis and
permanent organ damage.
473
00:19:58,229 --> 00:19:59,898
Ugh. Please tell me
Steve didn't win?
474
00:19:59,998 --> 00:20:00,800
Nope.
475
00:20:01,234 --> 00:20:03,740
He uh, tried to eat some guy's
MCL and they had a forfeit.
476
00:20:03,840 --> 00:20:05,644
And then he had a
steroid-induced seizure
477
00:20:05,678 --> 00:20:07,514
and was airlifted to the
hospital where they
478
00:20:07,547 --> 00:20:09,685
stabilized him and
gave him the vaccine.
479
00:20:09,719 --> 00:20:11,087
So.. who... won?
480
00:20:11,121 --> 00:20:12,958
Oh actually uh,
DJ Swaggy Bangerz
481
00:20:13,058 --> 00:20:14,595
and Ed from Martin and Martin.
482
00:20:14,662 --> 00:20:16,298
I guess he used
to play in college.
483
00:20:16,365 --> 00:20:18,468
Oh wow, heh.
Good for them.
484
00:20:22,310 --> 00:20:23,846
Yo DelVecchio, you awake?
485
00:20:23,946 --> 00:20:25,416
Yeah Hoagies, I'm awake.
486
00:20:25,651 --> 00:20:27,119
This bed's making
my ass go numb.
487
00:20:27,153 --> 00:20:27,955
Yo listen, okay,
488
00:20:28,021 --> 00:20:29,525
I know I give you
a lotta crap, but
489
00:20:29,559 --> 00:20:31,595
I actually kinda respect
you taking steroids.
490
00:20:31,729 --> 00:20:32,964
Oh, do you now?
491
00:20:33,031 --> 00:20:35,737
Yeah, dude. Putting your body on
the line like that for charity?
492
00:20:35,838 --> 00:20:37,273
Not a lot of guys
will go that hard
493
00:20:37,373 --> 00:20:38,877
for a good cause,
let me tell you.
494
00:20:38,910 --> 00:20:40,146
I appreciate that, Hoagies.
495
00:20:40,246 --> 00:20:41,515
That's very nice of you to say.
496
00:20:41,582 --> 00:20:43,753
A lot of people think
steroids are cheating.
497
00:20:43,853 --> 00:20:44,788
I personally don't agree.
498
00:20:44,955 --> 00:20:47,628
I think not taking steroids
is cheating the fans.
499
00:20:47,728 --> 00:20:48,563
Dude, 100%. Yo,
500
00:20:48,763 --> 00:20:50,567
the steroids era was the best
era in baseball.
501
00:20:50,667 --> 00:20:53,038
Barry Bonds is a frickin' hero
for doing what he did,
502
00:20:53,138 --> 00:20:54,575
putting all those
chemicals in his body,
503
00:20:54,676 --> 00:20:56,311
blowing up his heart
and shrinking his
504
00:20:56,345 --> 00:20:57,682
jewels, just so fans
could watch him
505
00:20:57,715 --> 00:20:59,350
mash long balls
into the stratosphere.
506
00:20:59,451 --> 00:21:01,188
I mean, c'mon.
- I couldn't agree more.
507
00:21:01,288 --> 00:21:03,760
So, tell me. Who'd you get
your gear from?
508
00:21:03,893 --> 00:21:04,695
Your fat friend?
- What?
509
00:21:04,929 --> 00:21:06,699
Nah, I didn't do steroids.
I'm natural, dude.
510
00:21:06,732 --> 00:21:08,435
I'm clean.
- C'mon, Hoagies.
511
00:21:08,569 --> 00:21:10,841
You are definitely on something.
Why are you in here, then?
512
00:21:10,941 --> 00:21:12,677
- Oh, I got rabies.
- Wait-wait-wait-wait.
513
00:21:12,711 --> 00:21:16,017
I got rabies, too--
You bit me--
514
00:21:16,151 --> 00:21:18,055
Did you frickin' give me rabies,
Hoagies?
515
00:21:18,088 --> 00:21:19,257
You piece of human garbage!
516
00:21:19,290 --> 00:21:20,561
Get out of here!
Give me a break!
517
00:21:20,594 --> 00:21:22,597
You speared me.
I was just defending myself.
518
00:21:22,698 --> 00:21:24,467
I'm gonna break
your frickin' head--
519
00:21:24,568 --> 00:21:26,204
I'll split it right open
in like a cantaloupe.
520
00:21:26,304 --> 00:21:27,073
Get over here!
C'mere!
521
00:21:27,508 --> 00:21:28,576
I'll bite you again.
I swear to God, dude!
522
00:21:28,743 --> 00:21:30,045
I'll bite your ear off
like Tyson!
38133
Can't find what you're looking for?
Get subtitles in any language from opensubtitles.com, and translate them here.
Afrikaans
Akan
Albanian
Amharic
Arabic
Armenian
Azerbaijani
Basque
Belarusian
Bemba
Bengali
Bihari
Bosnian
Breton
Bulgarian
Cambodian
Catalan
Cebuano
Cherokee
Chichewa
Chinese (Simplified)
Chinese (Traditional)
Corsican
Croatian
Czech
Danish
Dutch
English
Esperanto
Estonian
Faroese
Finnish
Galician
Georgian
German
Guarani
Haitian Creole
Hausa
Hawaiian
Hebrew
Hmong
Hungarian
Icelandic
Indonesian
Irish
Italian
Japanese
Kazakh
Kinyarwanda
Kirundi
Kongo
Korean
Krio (Sierra Leone)
Kurdish
Kyrgyz
Laothian
Latin
Latvian
Lithuanian
Luganda
Luo
Luxembourgish
Macedonian
Malagasy
Malay
Maltese
Maori
Mauritian Creole
Moldavian
Mongolian
Myanmar (Burmese)
Montenegrin
Nepali
Norwegian
Pashto
Persian
Polish
Portuguese (Brazil)
Portuguese (Portugal)
Quechua
Romanian
Romansh
Russian
Samoan
Scots Gaelic
Serbian
Sesotho
Setswana
Seychellois Creole
Shona
Sindhi
Sinhalese
Slovak
Slovenian
Somali
Spanish
Swedish
Tajik
Thai
Tigrinya
Tonga
Turkish
Turkmen
Ukrainian
Uzbek
Vietnamese
Welsh
Wolof