Original subtitles

Downloaded from YTS.LT

[♪ somber music ♪]

Official YIFY movies site: YTS.LT

(Narrator) Manatees.

God's gift to the sea.

Aren't they hot?

As much as I love these buxom babes,

this is not their story.

This is the legend of Billy Bates and his Special Needs Revolt.

My name is Manatee Lover, and this is our story.

- (Nate) Well, guys, it's New Year's Eve.

And of course, we're going to be celebrating tonight with a big party.

It should be a blast.

Yeah.

I thought it'd be a good idea

to start out with our New Year's resolutions.

Billy Bates, you've just arrived,

and we're still getting to know you.

Would you like to start?

I don't have any resolutions.

Sorry, fella.

It comes with the territory.

Come on, let it out.

I didn’t sign on for group therapy.

Come on.

Come on.

Yeah. Come on, come on, Billy.

I shouldn't even be here.

You'll need as many allies as you can find in this group home.

Fine.

Ever since I was little,

I've been bullied about my disability.

Even by my own Grandma.

I lived with her since I was a kid.

Everyone called her Mrs. Bates.

And she was a lot like her namesake in Psycho.

[grunting and screaming]

Oh God, there’s something in my stomach!

I can’t get it out of my belly!

I told you not to watch this libtard crap.

Next thing I know, you'll be campaigning

for that Muslim Derek Osama.

Grandma was a real bitch.

No, grandma.

It's brand new.

Where did you get this?

Answer me when I ask you a question.

Who brought this piece of shit into our home?

It was Adrian.

He gave it to me for Christmas.

Adrian? This idiot?

Well, I'll fix his ass.

Oh!

I better not see you come near my grandson again.

Got it, commie pervert?

Adrian was my only friend and she drove him away.

Most other people are bullies.

Calling me Billy Bates,

Master Bates, all the time.

It's not fair.

[woman moaning]

Oh, yeah. Ha ha.

Later that day,

when I was trying to watch a Ken Burns documentary,

things took a turn for the worse.

[woman moaning]

I knew it.

You're in big trouble, Mister.

Get back here right now!

[horn honk]

Oh my God! Oh!

Son of a bitch!

Shit!

Not again!

Your grandmamma got ran over by a reindeer.

Fuck you, four wheels!

Gentlemen, be civil.

Billy, please continue.

Because my parents were dead and I had no other family,

the state had no choice but to put me in this group home.

Billy, this is Nate.

He and the rest of the staff are going to be taking care of you from now on.

Listen to them and behave yourself, okay?

I don’t see why I can’t live on my own?

I don't belong here,

Billy,

why don't you look around?

I'll grab your things and show you to your room.

I'm sure there won't be any problem.

Down’s people are so cute.

Just like little tiny Buddhas with slanty eyes.

Sure.

- This ain’t so bad.

This ain’t like every group home

you’ve ever seen.

I've never seen a group home before.

So no basis for comparison.

Dude.

Billy. Meet Will.

He's been here for a long time, and so have a lot of other residents.

We're only here to help you.

The sounds like being a prisoner to me.

Give it a try.

We have games, activities, life guidance.

I don't need any help.

I don't need to have play dates

with some cerebral palsy jerk.

Billy!

- Oh! - Will, not cool man.

- Son of a bitch! - That’s what you get.

Everyone was against me.

My dead Grandma,

the state,

Will and his stupid wheelchair.

But I'll get my revenge on Will later.

Wait, what?

When you least expect it, buddy.

There must be something positive you can say about being here, Billy.

I got to watch wrestling for, like, fifteen minutes yesterday.

I was watching a replay of the latest Spank Down.

Trying to perfect my moves.

- (commentator #1) I hate this guy. - (comentator #2) Who is this? It’s like a goon?

- It's one of rock star Robbie Vegas... - That’s not a goon.

That is one of his roadies.

Taking one for the team,

and Fartbomb is assaulting this man.

What is this? Oh shit.

Is that Fartbomb?

Oh. That's good.

You know it. He’s the best.

- No. The Fartbomb fights against injustice like the rockstar Robbie Vegas,

with a kick to the midsection right here. - That's how you fight!

- That is how you fight!

- That's a real champ there.

- He's a coward. He's backing away.

- He's a smart man. You should never put your hand.

Oh, disgusting behavior by our so-called superhero.

Get out of there, Robbie! Get out!

Oh, we know what's coming next.

- Oh, no. Is it going to be?

He's going to hit him with the gas! - Disgusting!

That's one move I can't do.

That’s because you haven't tried it long enough.

Don't try it on me.

- I think the Fartbomb was telling Robbie Vegas, he will be World Heavyweight Champion.

Oh. Oh!

Damn, you reek!

Silent but deadly, biatch.

You know you love me.

And that's when I knew I had an enemy for life.

But I'll get my revenge.

Stop saying that.

So my New Year's resolution is to be independent.

I don't need a residential home.

I don't need anybody.

Other people just let you down.

[doorbell]

Come on, y'all. Pizza's here.

Let's go.

Yay!

[♪ party music ♪]

♪ When I'm on patrol. ♪

♪ I'm looking for trolls. ♪

♪ Show ‘em who's boss. ♪

♪ Then I exact a cost. ♪

♪ I'm gonna troll the troll. ♪

♪ Gonna crush your soul, troll the trolls. ♪

[wet noises]

Come on, Billy, you can jerk off later.

Right now there is a party going on and you're not in it.

I'm not jerking off.

I'm moisturizing.

My hands are going to be so smooth and silky.

So soft.

Now I'm going to jerk off.

You sure you want to do that?

Because last I checked, there's some very sweet ass I hired for the party.

Not to mention a shitload of booze.

Oh,

I think what you meant to say

is there are a lot of smart, intelligent women at the party.

Sure, whatever.

♪ Gonna crush your soul, troll the troll ♪

♪ Troll the troll. ♪

♪ Ah! it’s never been sold. ♪

That was Troll the Troll by Drew Cole,

a song that people are dancing to across the nation.

Once again, this is Jerry Johnson.

And Kiwi Jackson.

And this is Jammin’ New Year's Eve in Times Square.

Welcome to Jammin’ New Year's Eve in Times Square.

We would like to welcome the ravaging wrestler Fartbomb.

Happy New Year's Eve, Fartbomb.

Thanks, Kiwi.

It's going to be a great new year.

Except for anybody facing me at this Saturday’s Spankdown.

I'm taking on all comers

for the most insane and hardcore match you ever imagine.

We’re looking for the best wrestling on the planet.

Tune in, only on streaming.

Oh man, I can't wait.

Unbelievable.

What keeps you motivated to keep coming back to the ring?

Actually, I do it all for my wife, Cindy.

She's the most beautiful girl

a melted-face wrestler like myself could have.

We'll be here with Fartbomb until the ball drops.

Thanks, Kiwi.

It gives me great pleasure to introduce the wealthy Manhattan real estate mogul

Donald J. Kruger,

who has just announced his candidacy for president of the United States.

Happy new year Jerry, and happy new year America.

Excuse me one moment

while my gorgeous assistant arranges my fabulous hair

into an equally fabulous ponytail.

Oh! Oh, oh.

Thank you baby.

I think we could all agree that no one has hair like mine.

We can also agree that no one has clothes like mine.

I, I only have this one suit because,

hey, you cannot do better than this.

I'm also a great job creator.

My wife, for instance, works overtime in our bedroom

to satisfy my astonishing sexual stamina.

I make her do all sorts of jobs.

I mean, first of all, there's the missionary.

That's boring, but it's there, etc.

and then there's...

And then there's...

plus a lot of other jobs that I'm not even going to mention

because, like, your heart might not be able to stand it.

I have the intellect of a college professor,

the erectile stamina of a teenager, and the hair...

The hair.

Let's look at it again.

Woo! Flaunt it, flaunt it, show it.

Show it.

Yes yes yes.

But enough about me.

Let's talk about our country.

The only one who can save our country is me.

We are being taken over and overrun by minorities and perverts.

I'm talking Mexicans, I'm talking Asians, I'm talking blacks.

I'm talking Syrians, Muslims, queers, weirdos, freaks.

And oh, let's not forget cripples,

and retards.

And when I am elected president, I will send them

all to concentration institutions.

This is my vow to America.

Vote for me and I will make America straight again.

- Not cool, Kruger.

Those people you're talking about are some of my biggest fans.

You tell ‘em, Fartbomb.

Hey, is that your wife?

She looks delicioso.

She can lay down on

one of my hotels whenever.

Ass munch.

Don't you dare say that about my Cindy.

I'll squash your ass like the shriveled prune you are!

Oh, my.

Looks like it's time for us to take a break.

More with Jammin’ New Year's Eve

after this.

That asshole wants to make America straight again?

I need a beer.

Here you go, pal.

-Thanks.

You want anything to eat?

Sure, a quesadilla.

Yo, give me one of them things too, man.

And now for my revenge.

[♪ heavy metal music ♪]

-Thank you, Billy.

This looks fantastic.

You too slow, bitch.

That's what you get for being Down’s,

because you’re slow. Too fucking slow.

I’ll show you who’s slow, motherfucker.

[crash and cat screech]

Wow, that was a great shot.

High five.

Your hands are so soft.

Thank you.

I was going to masturbate with them, but I'd rather let

you decide.

This looks like the beginning of a beautiful friendship.

Damn quesadilla!

Move it! Shit’s about to go down!

Ah! Fuck.

I've never done it with a person with Down's before.

It's just like doing with a norm.

But better.

We'll take it nice and slow.

My room is right around the corner.

What are we waiting for?

- (countdown on TV) 8... 7... 6...

- 5... 4... 3...

-2... 1...

[♪ “Auld Lang Syne” plays ♪]

[♪ dark synth theme ♪]

[radio static]

This is Debbie Meadows with LTNM news.

Thousands of anti-President Kruger protesters

who were peacefully gathered today in Washington, D.C.

have been beaten, shot or killed.

It is unclear what the death toll is at this time.

This just in.

President Kruger has declared a new law with the newly formed government,

making it illegal for minorities and political minorities

to protest in the street, violent or even nonviolent.

I'm told that we are being

forcibly taken off the air by the president's new government.

I'm sorry, everybody, but

this will be my last news broadcast.

Good night,

and may God be with us all.

[pounding on door]

[door breaking in]

[smashing glass]

Whoa whoa whoa.

Okay.

Don't you people believe in freedom of speech anymore?

[gunshot]

[radio static]

This is Piers Moore with the BBC.

Homophobic and racial hate crimes and attacks

have reached an all time high in the USA, Canada and here in the UK.

What is your name?

You want my license?

This says “Fuck you, nigger!”

Get out of this fucking world!

Get out of this fucking state!

Go back to whatever fucking Asian country you belong in.

Okay, racist.

You're not a woman. You're a dude.

You got cock and balls, okay?

You got man boobs. Your a fucking faggot.

I don’t want to work on your car.

Get the fuck out of my fucking shop!

[whoosh transition]

[pants unzipping]

Damn!

Niagara Falls up in here.

I’m a lumberjack!

[♪ ominous music ♪]

Come on, let's go.

Move it!

All right, get moving.

Come on!

Get in the car.

Bryant?

Get over here.

I refuse to go to the Institution!

Get in!

Wait! Stop!

It doesn't have to be like this.

Let them go.

You must be the one hiding all these retards.

Why are you doing this?

Because no lives matter, biatch.

[taser sound]

Stop!

That's enough.

Don't tell us how to do our job for President Kruger.

Okay, retard.

I don't know how you got out, but you’re coming with us.

Out of where?

Don't be a smart ass, retard.

Look, this will be a lot easier if we don't have to splatter

your brains all over the place. Just cooperate.

Yes officer.

Oh! Come here!

[taser noise]

Oh! Oh, God. Oh.

The fuck.

You're not going to get away that easy.

[gunshots]

[moaning]

Hello?

Billy?

Christ on a stick. It's a retard.

You didn't mention anything about a fucking tard, man.

The deal's off.

Cocksucker.

No offense, cocksucker.

Billy. You're awake.

Thank God.

What the Hell is going on in Donville?

Things have changed.

I was once the greatest staff worker in Donville.

Now I'm the greatest cocksucker in Donville.

You slipped on my puke, Billy,

and hit your noggin.

You've been in a coma for three years.

Holy ass crackers.

No wonder I had to piss so bad.

Yes. And while you were out,

Donald J. Kruger was elected president.

Kruger?

You mean that motherfucker with the long white hair

is President?

How the fuck did that happen?

The electoral college. Go figure.

Shit.

You can say that again.

He's turned our country into a brutal dictatorship

and put all the people with disabilities in C.I.s.

- What are those? - Concentration institutions.

Here, I'll show you a top secret video Kruger has shared

with his inner circle.

[♪ ”Hail to the Chief” plays ♪]

Hello, hello.

Hello, my loyal followers.

I am your president, your boss and your moral leader,

Donald J. Kruger.

I put together a video presentation just to show you

some of the wonderful things I'm doing for our country.

Ever since I took office, I've been following through

on all the promises I made during our campaign.

Promises that 33% of you loved.

The other 67% of you? Eh.

You know what?

You can all go to fucking Hell for all I care.

Because no matter what the politically correct elitists say,

I am the most incredible uniter you have ever seen or ever will see.

Believe me.

Here at the Donville Concentration Institution, or C.I. for short,

we see retards being forced to walk in a circle for ten hours a day

listening to nursery rhymes.

Because no matter what

the politically correct elite say, that's all retards are good for.

Just one more example of the marvelous strides

we are taking to make America straight again.

My good friend,

a great guy named John Blaine Gacy, really knows how to do his job as guard.

Watch, listen, and if possible, learn.

[♪ “Pop the Weasel” plays ♪]

Did you hear the music stop, 1138?

Man, I'm tired.

I need a poop.

Oh!

Listen up, retards!

Apparently 1138 is tired and he has to poop.

Would anyone have the courage in this room to explain to 1138

what the rules are?

I didn't think so.

Well, that leaves me and you.

I think I got a remedy for your problem.

It’ll help jog your memory regarding the rules.

Pop goes Gacy.

Would anybody else in the room like to use the bathroom?

Just one of the many

marvelous strides we're taking in the era of Kruger.

So this is your emperor, I mean your president.

Emperor later, president now,

signing off,

saying hair today, hair tomorrow.

Have you ever in your life

seen such an incredible fucking head of hair?

I mean, really, this is something else.

How'd you get this video, Nate?

Never mind how I got this video.

I think you know how I got this video.

But I've been out there.

The bigotry, the police.

How did the American people let all this happen?

There's a conspiracy theory supporting him.

The P-anon movement.

P-anon has convinced people

that your kind are dangerous and deserve to be locked away.

No!

They get their orders directly from the president.

I will show you.

P-anon’s are the greatest.

P-anon’s are the real Americans.

I just love words that start with P.

Just ask my wife.

Just ask my ex-wife.

Just as my other ex-wife.

They're not the sharpest tacks in the toolbox, but they all have pussies.

And pussy starts with P. Pussy, pussy, pussy starts with P.

I watch Sesame Street too, and P-anon starts with P,

and that's why I love P-anon.

Because it's just like a tight little pussy.

Well, this is your hair man saying goodbye,

because I think that's about all I got to say today.

Except I love you all.

Hugs.

Cocksucker must pay.

No offense, cocksucker.

Hey! What about Fartbomb?

Surely he can help us.

Yeah, about Fartbomb...

[♪ classical piano ♪]

Hello, I'm Lloyd Kaufman,

president of Troma Entertainment and creator of the Toxic Avenger.

I bet you folks out there are wondering exactly who or what is Fartbomb?

Well, wonder no more.

[♪ upbeat music ♪]

Eight years ago,

Dexter Kelp, a young man with a disability,

worked at the Donville Karate School as a janitor.

Hey, Dexter. Come upstairs right now.

I just took a huge dump in the bathroom, and there's poopy water all over the place.

Oh, I'll be up in a sec.

Oh, okay.

Okay, here we go.

Oh. That's secure. That's really good.

That's not going anywhere.

You ready for your ride, toxic waste?

One day,

while Dexter was dumping out poopy water,

a truck carrying toxic Moosanto bovine growth hormone

changed his life forever.

Delivering the toxic waste.

It's a good day out.

It's always a good day when you got

toxic waste in the back.

Whew!

Here we go. Here...

Whoa!

Aaaah!

Oh.

What’s happening to me?!

Aah!

Oh, I'm burning up! Ah!

Oh. That's not good.

Well, you know what?

I've seen worse. Let's go.

And that, folks, is when Dexter turned into Fartbomb.

At first, Fartbomb was

depressed about his appearance.

But when he discovered

that his flatulence could stop crime,

he began to embrace his new identity.

And before long, Fartbomb met a hot woman named Cindy.

It was love at first montage.

Pretty good story, huh?

Of course, it's a total rip off of the Toxic Avenger.

But it's certainly not the first time.

And now, back to our story.

Unfortunately, nobody has seen

or heard from Fartbomb since Kruger came into power.

Many, like me, have feared that he has abandoned Donville and America.

Fuck!

However, there is a group of rebels who are training to fight President Kruger

secretly on the Black Hawk Indian Reservation,

led by their leader, Chief Broken Arrow.

Awesome.

But why would the Native Americans want to help us?

Because of more broken treaties

and being given COVID-19 infected blankets.

Not to mention an oil pipeline built on their land.

- That's enough exposition!

- You are surrounded.

Now hand over the retard and nobody gets hurt.

Well, except the retard,

who will be put in a concentration institution

- and treated like an ignorant large child.

Here, take this DVD.

Nah, fuck DVD.

No one has a DVD player anymore.

Here's a digital copy.

Take it to the rebels at the Blackhawk Reservation.

They'll know what to do with it.

Go now before it's too late.

All right.

I'm going to count to three, and then we're coming in.

One.

Two.

Three!

Oh, shit.

Oh, shit.

[♪ rap music plays ♪]

♪ C’mon ♪

♪ Get up of yo ass ♪

♪ C’mon ♪

♪ Set pool, motherfucker ♪

♪ Battle anybody ♪

♪ That’s right ♪

♪ That’s right, I said it ♪

♪ Sittin’ here with a Coors Light ♪

♪ and the Northern Lights ♪

♪ light-headed ♪

♪ I said it, dead it, don’t forget it ♪

[cars breaking, doors slamming]

So, who ordered the deep fried retard?

That's a good one, Sherrif David.

All right.

Our job's done.

Let's go.

Don't worry, Nate.

Your death will not be in vain, I swear it!

Keep smiling while you can, Kruger.

I’m going to barbecue

your ass in molasses.

It only takes time.

[♪ news stinger ♪]

Breaking news.

We take you to a shopping mall in Wisconsin, where

President Kruger is addressing a crowd of two thousand people.

Let's listen in.

[crowd cheering]

What an incredible crowd we have here today.

This may be the largest crowd in the whole history of crowds.

I would say there's...

two million people here today.

Yeah. Two million.

And they all love me.

And why shouldn't they?

I am single handedly rescuing this country from the liberals, the bitches,

the faggots, the niggers, the gooks and the tards.

Oh. They say I lost the popular vote.

Who fucking cares?

That's why the electoral college was invented.

To correct the errors made by the left wing.

I am your president.

Your emperor.

Your god.

And whoever you are, as long as you voted for me, I am here for you.

Forever and ever and ever.

And together, we will

make America straight again.

[crowd noise]

[birds singing]

Who are you?

What do you want?

Billy Bates.

I've come to join the rebellion.

Paulus. It's a PWD, man.

We got to take him in before the fuzz gets him.

PWD? What the fuck?

Good afternoon, Chief Broken Arrow.

We found you this stray PWD.

Okay, what’s with this PWD shit?

Have a little more respect for your elders.

PWD is a code name for people with disabilities.

I guess badass was already taken.

So, young badass.

What makes you want to join the rebellion?

I promised my friend that I would avenge him.

That, and the fact that I'd rather eat a bucket of dog shit.

Then let that ass hair Kruger stay president.

Well, let me introduce you to your fellow soldiers.

This is Paulus.

He’ll teach you about automatics and weaponry.

This is Manatee Lover.

He’ll teach you about bombs and explosives.

You can save the training.

I know all I need to know about bullets and bombs.

And now what I don't know is...

Why is he called Manatee Lover?

Because I like to go to aquariums and see the manatees there,

smart ass.

Come on, ML, you can do better than that.

All right. Fine, chief.

Because when I go to the aquariums, sometimes

I like to get blowjobs from the manatees.

Like my girlfriend, Dana the Dugong.

Funny you should mention that.

It's how my friend got this.

It's a video

of the concentration institutions.

The time has come.

Take this video to John the Aspie.

He'll know what to do with it.

Till then, my soldiers will prepare you for battle.

We have some concentration institutions to liberate.

The revolution is now.

- Yes, sir. - Good luck PWD

You’ll need it.

It's Billy, sir.

Good luck, Billy Badass.

[♪ uplifting rock music ♪]

♪ What makes a man ♪

♪ an Up syndrome man? ♪

♪ Is it Trisomy 21? ♪

♪ Is it that you fight ♪

♪ goes on top? ♪

♪ so we can know your glory? ♪

♪ Now you’re a man, ♪

♪ an Up syndrome man. ♪

♪ Now you're a man, ♪

♪ manly manly man. ♪

♪ Up, up, up. ♪

♪ You are now an Up syndrome man. ♪

♪ Up syndrome man. ♪

♪ What makes an Up, ♪

♪ an Up syndrome man? ♪

♪ Is it the power in his hands? ♪

♪ Or is it the way ♪

♪ he fights every day ♪

♪ to bring down all the tyrants? ♪

♪ Now you’re a man, an Up syndrome man. ♪

♪ Now you're a man, manly manly man. ♪

♪ Up, up, up. ♪

♪ You are now an Up syndrome man. ♪

♪ Up syndrome man. ♪

[♪ “Hail to the Chief” plays ♪]

Thank you so much

for taking the time to speak with me, Ambassador Chan.

My pleasure, Mr. President.

It's about this Dic Doc thing.

It's this app that the kids are using.

I don't like it.

I see, why is that?

I want to see more videos from people who love me.

Can you make that happen?

Yes, of course I can make that change to the algorithm.

But may I ask for something?

Sure, what do you need?

We'd like more data on all American users.

Hmm. Hmm.

We'll make you the

number one best person on Dic Doc for all time.

Great. Let's do that.

And we'd like to send some spy balloons over your American states.

Terrific. Make it happen.

Excuse me, Mr. President. I'm so sorry, sir.

Sorry, I have to go now.

Take care of yourself and watch out for that kung flu.

(in Chinese) American Pig Asshole.

Caldwell, don't you know how to fucking knock?

Sir, although I am your chief of staff and should get a little bit more respect.

Just be grateful I haven't had you castrated

like I did the Secretary of the Interior

when he touched my hairbrush.

Yes, sir. Thank you sir.

Sir, we have a report that the rebel base

is on the Blackhawk Reservation outside of Donville.

Great. Soon those redskin and retard lovers

will know the meaning of the word euthanasia.

Get out of here and don't come back

until you have some great news about their defeat.

Yes, sir.

Would you like a little bit of a handy before I leave?

Hmm.

Thanks, Caldwell, but not today.

But, send one of those midget women in and tell her

I need a blowjob ASAP.

I'm on it, sir.

[♪ military drumbeat ♪]

Not bad, huh?

Sure, if you want to give him a haircut and a manicure.

What, you think you can do better?

What, you think you can do better?

No. I know I could do better.

[squeaking wheels]

Ah!

You two-wheeled son of a bitch!

It’s four wheels, you motherfucker.

Ya thought I forgot that shit you did at the group home.

Will, you're alive!

Absolutely in the flesh, biatch.

I can’t believe Kruger didn’t lock your perverted ass up.

Nate got me out.

Brought me to the reservation with the Chief.

So I'm here.

Motherfucking Nate!

Will, I got some bad news, man.

Nate is now the late Nate.

What? The fuck happened to Nate?!

The fuzz got him.

My God.

We gonna have to free our people to avenge Nate.

You know, that's right.

Well, since you two are reunited now,

it's time to find John the Aspie.

Who is this John the Aspie?

John the Aspie.

He's a war vet.

We've been doing business with since day one.

He has Asperger’s syndrome.

No shit.

You couldn’t come up with a better nickname than that?

Well, I wanted to call him Gas Burger

because he eats a lot of burgers and farts a lot.

Gas Burger.

I love it.

It works on so many levels.

Too much like Fartbomb, though.

He's also a computer hacker.

He knows how to get that video out where people will see it.

[distant gunfire]

Chief Broken Arrow.

What's wrong, Raven? What's going on?

The National Guard has come on to the Rez.

I thought this was a sovereign nation.

Nothing’s been sovereign since Kruger took office.

[cannon fire]

Run!

Come on, men.

Don't give them time to regroup.

Die, you rebel scum!

Oh, yeah.

Come get some.

Come on, you guys, let's go!

Move, move!

Get out of here!

What do we got here?

Die, you commie bastard!

You have to find John the Aspie.

He'll help you end Kruger's reign of terror.

What about you, chief?

I have to stay here and protect my people.

Now go.

Are you crazy? They’re going to slaughter you!

Man. You heard the chief.

We got to get the up Hell out of here.

He is the chief. Let's go!

Chief!

Shit!

They just killed everyone!

These assholes are going to pay.

Ladies!

I'm Billy.

You two hot mamas gonna just stand around,

not introducing yourselves?

Or you just here to give us boners?

The name's Raven.

It's Carmen,

and we're nobody's hot mamas.

Yeah, you sure about that?

Yeah, I'm sure.

Whoa! Oh.

Oh, I fucking deserved that.

I definitely deserved it.

That's definitely an understatement.

And if you ever talk to us or treat us that way again,

I'm gonna slice off your dick and wear it as a unicorn horn.

Do you fucking understand me?

Judging by the size of the bulge in his pants,

I'd say you'd have better luck using it as a toothpick.

And we're not even the type to penis shame.

By the way, I'm Alex.

I'm your typical transgender woman.

Well, check out our gang.

A Downy, a trans woman,

two ball-kicking bitches,

a deviant and a CP.

We are Kruger’s worst nightmare.

I got a prescription for El Presidente,

a foot up his ass.

Let's make a house call.

A White House call.

Well, wait a minute.

What are we going to do now that Chief Broken Arrow is dead?

Who's going to lead us?

It's gotta be you, Billy.

Why me?

It's got to be you. Because you got Down's syndrome.

You gotta show ‘em that people like you and me

can lead and kick ass.

That's too much responsibility.

What if I fuck up?

To be honest, man, you killed it on the range.

You learned so goddamn fast.

And if what you said about what happened with the cops is true,

My God, you're definitely ready for this.

You're the one.

Okay then.

I say we find Fartbomb.

What about John the Aspie?

Don't we gotta find him? We need more guns.

And we got to show people that video.

First things first.

Fartbomb is a superhero.

He'll be the greatest weapon of them all.

Witch hunt.

Disgusting. Obnoxious. Awful. Rotten.

Witch hunt. Witch hunt.

Excuse me, Mr. President. Miss Minton is here.

Okay, bring her in.

Yes, sir.

Good evening, Mallory.

So glad you could make it.

After losing the election to you, I find it somewhat disconcerting

to be invited to dinner with you.

And I have to admit,

I am struggling to address you as Mr. President

after the horrible campaign you ran

I was looking forward to never speaking to you ever again.

No problem. Just call me Donald. And...

let's try to put the past behind us.

First of all, I have to apologize to you

for some of the more outrageous things I said during our campaign.

Calling you a cunt on national television was perhaps going a bit too far.

Yes, perhaps.

And even though the networks bleeped you out, everyone can read your lips.

I think they thought I was calling you a cat.

Oh, no. Oh, no. Cunt!

They. They knew.

Loud and clear.

Well, maybe so, but that's in the past now.

Let's try to mend our fences.

And I was hoping you could even join my team.

Oh, well, that's a nonstarter.

But, hey, I would love to hear this out.

That's all I ask.

But first, let's have some dinner.

Would you like some wine to start?

Red or white?

Red, please.

My pleasure, Mallory.

My extreme pleasure.

[♪ ominous music ♪]

Donald.

Mallory.

Caldwell, get in here.

Yes, sir.

You know what to do.

Yes, sir. Consider it done, sir.

No extra funding for your next campaign, Mallory.

Bye bye.

Witch hunt. Disgusting.

Witch hunt. Witch hunt. Witch hunt. Witch hunt.

Nikolai, thanks for coming by on such short notice.

You have the money?

Of course I do.

Excellent.

I trust you.

I don't have to count it.

And the shipment is already underway.

Another slave for your labor camp?

Yes.

We have made good use of your

last shipment

of political rivals.

Like that Derek Osama.

We had fun reenacting that

scene from your American show,

Roots.

The one with the whip.

Ha Ha Ha!

Shit.

Fartbomb’s a prisoner.

Yeah, Kruger put him on house arrest for all the shit he was talking.

He was speaking out against him, and he sure didn't like it.

When the fuck were you gonna tell us that?

Sorry, I fucked up, I forgot,

I screwed the pooch on this one, I know.

Well, does anybody have a plan for this?

Actually, I do.

Hey, boys.

I'm gonna fuck you to death.

You're one dead faggot, asshole.

I think they got the point.

Ugggghh!

Ugggghh!

Tough crowd.

What do you want?

Open up, Fartbomb. We’re here to save you.

[prolonged farting]

(Manatee Lover) It smells like Bigfoot's fermented dick cheese.

You guys are supposed to save me?

A Downy, a transwoman,

two ball-kicking bitches...

A deviant and a CP.

We already covered that.

Now, where the fuck were you when we needed you?

So when President Kruger came to power,

I tried to speak up, but I couldn't.

We all know how the government controls the media.

You know he got rid of the free press.

[transition chime]

Mr. President, why haven't you taken

a stronger approach to the pandemic?

[coughing]

There is no pandemic.

[coughing]

The fake news media...

just wants to... muzzle me...

and make me wear a mask.

[crowd coughing]

Even if there was a pandemic

I would make sure...

I had the very best health care...

And that there was just enough vaccine...

...for me. Ha!

[transition chime]

Then President Kruger

took my wife Cindy away.

Stop calling him President Kruger.

He's not my president.

Call him shitface,

asshat, sleaze bucket,

dickwad,

cocksucker...

No offense, cocksucker.

Just not President.

Come on, Fartbomb.

You got to man up and grow a pair.

It's time to fight

and get your sweet little Cindy back.

Okay, okay.

No more President Kruger.

Where do we go from here?

America's gone.

Bite your tongue, boy.

America's right here.

Yeah, man.

Fuck Kruger! We are America.

Let's make this happen.

What he said.

What are we waiting for?

Let's make America weird again.

Yeah!

I wonder what Kruger even wanted with Cindy anyways.

[squealing]

Get Away! Dexter!

Oh Dexter! Where are you?

[knocking]

Oh, shit.

Oh thank God.

Just a second.

Sir.

I’ve got good news, and I've got bad news.

What is it?

[sigh]

I'm sorry, sir.

Well, the good news is we have successfully

crushed the rebellion at the Blackhawk Reservation.

And the bad news?

Some of them...

...might have gotten away.

Oh, fuck. That is just perfect.

I tell you, you cannot find good help these days.

Is there anything else, sir?

Hey, motherfucker, I ask the questions around here, not you.

Yes, sir. Sorry, sir.

No, there's nothing else.

Wait.

Get me a taco.

Yes, sir.

Tacos rule.

And blowjobs.

Your reign of terror will come to an end.

My Dexter will stop you. I can feel it.

“My Dexter will stop you, I can feel it.”

You've been recycling that line for the past three years.

There's only one thing you should be feeling.

Now, where were we?

Oh! Get away!

You dirty old man!

Oh. Oh.

Who's this guy we're looking for?

John the Aspie.

The chief never told us where to find him.

Why not?

He got blown up.

You know, sans that,

all I can think about back here is how, when we're done with all this,

I'm going to be fucking the brains

out of my manatee girlfriend, Dana the Dugong.

Oh, it's going to be so good.

Oh, my God.

Dana the fucking dugong!

[♪ somber music ♪]

These are the convicts of Stukes,

an island without women in the Gulf of Carpentaria.

They have captured one of those marine monsters

which biologists today call dugong.

Once they were called sirens.

Those mysterious creatures about whom Homer sang.

Half fish, half beautiful woman, the lure of which caused the death

of so many sailors in ancient times.

♪♪♪

The convicts watch her slow agony in stony silence.

They are waiting for nightfall, when they will perpetrate over her flesh

a rite of love,

tragic and ancient as the world itself.

[♪ triumphant music ♪]

No! Who would treat such a magnificent creature like this?!

What in the Holy Sea Cow?!

You're so beautiful, baby. Don’t worry, I got you!

I'm going to get you so wet, baby.

It's all going to be okay, I promise.

I ‘ll save you! I’m going to save you, baby!

[♪ love ballad ♪]

♪ I love you ♪

♪ My love is deep ♪

♪ as the ocean blue ♪

♪ I found another that I know ♪

♪ is true ♪

♪ And one ♪

♪ and one makes two ♪

[Dana snorts]

[slurping]

♪ All my love ♪

♪ my love is bright ♪

♪ as the stars above ♪

♪ The stars above that you’ll never see ♪

♪ cause you’re beneath the sea ♪

[slurping continues]

[Dana moans]

Hah!

Get your head out of the gutter.

Yeah, I deserved that.

So, when all this is over,

you think you and me can have sex?

We'll see.

Oh, it's a real Kruger!

[grunting]

You think there's even anybody in there?

Probably a fucking bear. Let’s keep moving.

No, let's see what's inside.

I mean, I've never fucked a bear before, but I'm down to try anything.

Yeah, if it doesn't bite our dick off first.

Hey. Excuse me.

I can take care of myself. Thank you very much.

Okay.

You want to be a bear's personal bitch?

Go for it.

Hello?

[animal roaring]

Ah! A bear!

Aaaarghh!

Who's there?

Fartbomb?!

Who are you?

I'm John the Aspie!

That was easy.

Wait up for me guys, I had to shit!

[gunshot]

Pop goes Gacy!

The people need to see this.

Chief Broken Arrow said you could help us.

How did you guys find me?

Honestly, this was the first place we looked.

Where have you been, man?

And what's your excuse for giving up the fight against Kruger

and waiting for the right dramatic moment to reappear?

Me and Jake, a friend of mine,

we created a website where we can

share memes and porn.

But it became a platform

for the P-anon movement.

More and more people believed in pedophile pizza parlors,

Jewish space lasers, and convinced themselves

that only Kruger could save them from all that made-up bullshit.

And then one day, my friend Jake just disappeared.

He's probably in one of those institutions,

if he's alive at all. His own creation destroyed him.

I don't want to be next.

But who’s spreading all that P-anon bullshit?

Where is it all coming from?

[computer beeps]

So that's what hacking really looks like.

I thought it only looked like that

in those terrible 90s movies. No shit.

The Donville Concentration Institution.

That's where the P-anon signal is emanating from.

It's a prison.

And a weapon.

We have to take it down.

Billy's right. We have to stop P-anon once and for all.

Yeah, let's get those cocksuckers.

Hey, I'm just reclaiming the word “cocksucker.”

We will.

And replace it with this, so everyone can see the truth.

It's what the chief would have wanted.

Chief Broken Arrow? Where is he?

He got fucked up by Kruger's army.

Chief Broken Arrow,

sleep well, my friend.

You shall not have died in vain.

[gong]

[♪ pursuit music ♪]

[♪ (We swear it’s not the Batman theme song) ♪]

- Hahahahahahahaha.

I am the great genie.

You have freed me from my prison.

So tell me.

What does your heart desire?

[♪ tense synthesizer tones ♪]

I don't want this!

[♪ heroic music ♪]

Yippie ki yay, motherfucker!

Oh, shit! Oh, shit!

Let's go.

Are you ready to accept my domination?

No! No!

What a stupid bitch!

Oh my God!

Sir! Excuse me.

A bunch of retards along with Fartbomb have broken into the compound.

This is obviously some feeble attempt at defiance, but they are attacking.

We'll take care of it.

I don't want any of them alive.

I want them dead.

Yes, sir.

[♪ heroic music ♪]

Oh, shit! Fartbomb and John the Aspie ran ahead of us.

We gotta split up.

I'm coming with you, Billy.

I'm coming with you too, man.

You need a lot of firepower.

Will. Don’t cockblock me, man.

Raven chose me, not you.

Nobody cockblocking you, man.

Let's go.

We all have to find that signal.

Let’s move out.

[Hissing]

- Elephants! Guards! Help us!

Stop! Meow meow...

For kids!

Not adults!

- Where is the panther? - Go away.

[alarm sounds]

Oh, shit!

What are we going to do now?

Well, well, well.

This is the end of the line, retards and retard lovers.

You thought you were going to lead a rebellion?

How foolish.

I'll take care of this.

That's right.

You go get ‘em, Fartbomb!

Awesome.

Front row seats.

[♪ thrash metal ♪]

You frigging freak!

Oh! Whoa!

Whoa!

Have a seat?

Oh, God.

Please, Fartbomb.

Listen, I was just following orders.

Honestly, I'm a good guy outside of work.

I'm a good guy.

Wait, wait, wait, wait. I have a chinchilla at home.

Her name's Sally. She kind of looks like you.

I'm sorry, but, like, she needs her papa.

Come on, you've got to understand.

Okay, wait. Listen, I'll tell you the truth.

I'll tell you the truth. I'll tell you.

I have OCD.

You don't understand.

Like, I need order. And I like control.

And also sometimes when I start getting nervous, I start stuttering.

And like, they woulda locked me up.

They would’ve institutionalized me like everyone else.

Obviously, you got to understand. Wait, wait.

Okay.

Thank you. Thank you.

Let's see what's really inside you.

[explosive fart]

[♪ thrash metal ♪]

Aaaarrrggghhh!

Fartbomb! Fartbomb!

Whoa!

Oh, shit.

Awesome.

More like ass-some.

We found it!

Good.

Let's take this sucker down, replace it with that video.

Is it really disturbing, that video?

Jake! You're alive.

Yeah, but you won't be if you take another step.

I thought you were captured by P-anon.

I am P-anon.

I've always been P-anon.

You’ve sold out your own people. Why?

Why does anyone sell out? Money.

Kruger pays me really well to write his speeches.

Plus, I hate being disabled

along with all the other retarded trash that’s in here.

You write all that P-anon bullshit for Kruger?

I write all Kruger's speeches, including the one he's giving in Donville tomorrow.

Kruger’s going to be in Donville tomorrow?

Yeah, but you'll be in an unmarked grave.

Ow!

[distant gunfire]

That's got to be John.

Get him!

You idiot!

You destroyed P-anon!

That was a practice shot.

The next one's going right between the eyes.

Motherfucker!

John!

You all right?

Guys, I don't think I'm going to make it.

Kruger's holding a rally at Donville tomorrow.

Fux News is covering it.

You gotta get this on the air.

I will.

Billy.

Keep up the good fight.

Don't worry.

We won't give up.

And tell Putin to go fuck himself.

He has no business being in the Asperger's community.

You’re in deep shit now, mister!

You retards think you're getting away with this?

President Kruger is going to make sure

that all of you pay for this dearly.

You stupid fucking moron!

Oh! Oh, Jesus.

I was only following orders.

Here's an order for you, asshole.

Enjoy yourself. Karma’s a bitch

and she's on the rag.

[♪ thrash metal ♪]

No!

Oh! Ah!

Ah!

[♪ hoedown music ♪]

I'm gonna show you guys a little something.

Show you guys a little something today. Okay.

All right.

Make my dad proud of me. That's right.

Yeah.

Oh. Oh!

Nice shot, Kyle.

Woo!

That was a clean kill, wasn't it, Dad?

It sure was, Junior.

Yes. Copy that.

Yes, I'll tell him.

Sir. I'm sorry to interrupt, sir.

Oh, great. What is it?

A bunch of retarded rebels and Fartbomb

have released all the tards from the Donville Concentration Institution, sir.

Well, that's just perfect.

You'll have to double the security for my speech in Donville.

Yes, sir. But there is some good news.

We found their vehicle. They must have abandoned it.

Abandoned it? Why?

They ran out of gas.

- Totally. I just... - Oh!

God damn it, Junior!

Watch where you aim that thing.

You almost got me.

Sorry, Dad.

Don't worry, son.

Just do better next time.

Yeah.

Oh, thank goodness we found this shelter when we did.

Hey, guys, while we have a few minutes

without fighting for the future

of our country, or killing bad people,

I realize I need to know a few things about you guys.

Well.

I don't have to go over my backstory.

Everybody knows about me and Cindy.

True that.

And all of you

are pretty aware of my history too.

And Manatee Lover’s.

But what about Carmen and Raven and Alex?

Yeah.

Oh, it's really a simple story.

We were strippers, and we were pretty good at it.

And then Kruger came and fucked everything up.

Pretty good? Speak for yourself, lady.

I was fucking great.

All right. Yeah, you were pretty great.

Well, you were too.

Hey, enough of this false modesty shit.

Okay, okay. I was great, too.

I got more money shoved in my crotch on an average Monday

than most dudes make in a week.

Anyway, we’d probably still be there,

except for two things.

Our boss, aka Dominic, the douche bag,

started pushing us to turn tricks.

He also started campaigning for Kruger.

The tricks we could have dealt with.

You, maybe.

Well, probably not.

But the Kruger part? No way.

And then one night, the asshole started putting the moves on us.

He wanted a three way, and he got super aggressive about it.

He wanted you and #MeToo.

Good one, girl.

Anyway, two powerful females can do quite a job on one asshole’s groin.

- Oh my groin!

He probably can't even function to this day.

And then we ran away, joined the resistance, and now...

...the only time we strip is for sex.

Now, if we could only find the right men to have sex with us.

Guess you better keep looking.

I'm sure the right guys

are out there somewhere.

Well, I guess I'm up next.

Believe it or not, I was married once,

to the greatest guy I've ever known.

Well, we weren't legally married, but we might as well have been.

His name was Rick.

We met in college, and it was love at first sight.

We moved into a really nice neighborhood in Donville.

For a while, things were great.

Rick was a baker, and a really good one.

The cakes were to die for.

Every birthday was a fiesta.

But things got nasty.

That nice neighborhood turned out to be a hotbed of transphobia.

And one day,

the neighbors descended on our house with clubs and told us to get out.

Or they would take permanent steps to make sure we vacated.

Rick argued and pleaded and oh my God, was he persuasive.

But they beat him to a pulp anyway.

And then they came at me.

I ran for our car and got out of there.

A few blocks away, I accidentally hit this old lady in another car,

crushed her head, so I had to stop.

Wait a minute, dude.

Coincidence alert!

That was my evil grandma you hit.

Wow. Small world.

Anyway, as I was saying...

I was put on trial even though it was an accident.

But President Osama pardoned me.

That was the good news.

The bad news was that Rick died of his injuries.

And more bad news...

When Kruger took office, he sent a warrant out for my arrest

for being a pet project of President Osama, and also just for being transgender.

So when I heard about the resistance, I was there.

So sorry about Rick.

But here we are.

And we’re all for one.

Hey, guys.

Kruger takes the stage in the town square tomorrow at 11 a.m.

Okay.

Look out, Kruger.

Tomorrow will be the day.

Yeah!

[♪ carnival music ♪]

Great.

Should have known security was going to be tight!

So how do we get in?

I think I found our solution, guys.

Great job, Manatee Lover.

I guess you're not just some sick, disgusting,

twisted pervert after all.

Can you all go ahead of me?

I really have to take a shit.

You gotta take a shit now?

Can't you hold it?

Forget her, Will. If she's gotta go, she's gotta go.

Hey, y'all, don't worry about me.

I'll meet up with y'all later.

- Hi. - Where do you think you're going?

Oh, I have, uh, clearance to serve food at Kruger's rally.

Let me see your papers.

Yeah, yeah. Hold on. Uh...

You know, I've, uh, I've been a supporter of Kruger's

for a long time, even before he became president.

Great guy.

Sure is. You know, in fact,

I've been a huge fan of his way back.

The TV show, all of it.

It's part of why I ended up getting permits so that I can serve,

you know, tacos here at the rally.

Not those terrible, gross, disgusting Mexican tacos, though.

You know what I'm talking about.

Good old fashioned American tacos.

Yeah. Mexicans are too spicy.

It's way too spicy, right?

Absolutely. So, we're good to go, right?

Heh heh heh.

No!

[♪ suspenseful synth music ♪]

Ah! Dugong dicks!

[jail door clangs]

Well, well, well.

You libtards thought you were going to get away with this.

Luckily,

we had a little help from someone you know.

Alex?!

That's right.

I've been working with the government this whole time.

How else do you think they found your secret resistance space?

And now, thanks to Alex, we have all six of you.

Why, Alex?

Why did you betray us?

Kruger doesn't care about transgender people!

Ha! Who cares if I'm transgender?

Kruger gives me money to throw the trans community under the bus.

I go on conservative talk shows, and I tell them that I'm de-transitioning.

I go on podcasts, and I tell people that transwomen are groomers.

I start absurd discourse online

with ludicrous hot takes

to sow chaos amongst leftists.

Have you checked my Twitler recently?

I have a million followers, and all of them with blue checkmarks

that they've paid for themselves.

I identify as a PSYOP.

Why would I ever give up the grift

of being conservatives’ token trans bitch?

But what about that story you shared with us

about getting run out of the neighborhood?

You mean how your grandma got run over?

That was a drug deal gone bad.

Luckily, Kruger pardoned me, and I've been in his service ever since.

You cocksucker!

I mean it this time.

Only you're the one who will be doing the cocksucking, in prison,

and carpet munching for you two.

Fuck you, you damn traitor!

Ha ha ha ha!

Sorry.

Not interested.

Well,

I think my work here is done.

Thanks for the tacos and the meatballs.

Wait, Caldwell.

What is it?

I'm sure this isn’t what you wanted.

Being the Mr. Smithers of the White House.

What are you talking about?

The party that you are a part of wasn’t always like this.

What President Kruger is doing is for the good of the nation.

All these immigrants and people of color,

they're not helping things.

And retards like you,

you're not helping anything.

You're gross.

But we are the nation.

People think pubic hair is gross.

But you don't see men shaving it off.

You're just being retarded because of your extra chromosome.

Am I retarded?

Because the last I checked,

Nazis and racism were supposed to be enemies of our country.

Like Hitler or Stalin.

Our country is not racist.

That's not true.

Really?

Then why are we being rounded up,

like Hitler did to the Jews?

Because that was President Kruger's orders.

Search your feelings.

You know it to be true.

You’ve been duped into doing something un-American.

I've heard enough.

Open the door.

[♪ suspenseful music ♪]

Go on, get out of here.

Thank you.

[♪ dark heroic music ♪]

Wait, Fartbomb! Have a heart!

Don't mind if I do.

[Howie scream!]

[Wilhelm scream!]

We've got to get to that Fux News truck.

And we gotta get that video on the air.

You're right.

Don't worry. Leave it to me.

I know what the Fux News people want.

I was wondering.

What's a girl got to do to get

sexually harassed around here?

We’ll help you.

[feminist punching]

My fellow Americans.

The retarded rebels have won a small victory here in Donville.

A very small victory, believe me.

But we will crush them, and we will win.

For this is America.

And in America, terrorism never wins.

At least not when they do it.

You suck, Kruger.

Boo!

Guard!

Well.

I guess punk really is dead after all.

Are there any other objections?

Not so fast, Kruger.

Oh, retard.

Did you get out of jail?

Your stooge set us free, after I gave him a good talking-to.

Ah, fuck!

You gave Caldwell one of those libtard speeches, didn't you?

Well, I'm getting rid of that motherfucker before the end of the day.

In the meantime, I brought someone along for protection.

Bring her out, Sergeant Massacre. - Yes, sir.

- Wait till you see who's here. - Come on, you stupid bimbo bitch!

- Cindy! - Dexter!

All right. Make any false moves,

and Fartbomb’s bitch gets her brain splattered all over the cement.

Drop your weapons now!

Very, very good.

Guard, give one of them a reward for their cooperation.

Yes, sir.

Oh!

Manatee Lover!

Tell... tell Dana I love her.

How could you?

You're so evil.

Eh. So what?

You're not going to kick me in the nuts this time?

Not this time.

Fuck you, King Kong Bundy.

(screams)

Oh, no.

Oh my God.

[computer beeping]

[modem connecting]

Here at the Donville Concentration Institution, or C.I. for short,

we see retards being forced to walk in a circle for ten hours a day,

listening to nursery rhymes.

Because no matter what the politically correct elite say,

that's all retards are good for.

Just one more example of the marvelous strides

we are taking to make America straight again.

[♪ “Pop Goes the Weasel” plays ♪]

Did you hear the music stop, 1138?

Now get back in line.

Man, I'm tired. I need a poop.

I think I got a remedy for your problem.

It’ll help jog your memory in regard to the rules.

Boo!

Shut up.

I am your emperor!

What’s happened to you people?!

I am your God! Shut up!

[♪ triumphant music ♪]

Chief! You're alive!

No shit.

Oh!

Oh, Dexter!

- Cindy! - Oh!

Out of my way, loser!

Shit!

That motherfucker's getting away.

What are you going to do about it, Billy?

Oh, I'm going to catch that big piece of shit and flush him down the toilet.

Go, we’ll handle it from here.

Take care of Cindy.

Dexter, hurry. I need you!

Let's see what this baby can do.

[engine sputters]

Shit!

Out of gas.

What are we going to do now?

[♪ angelic tones ♪]

[♪ pursuit music ♪]

[♪ (Once again, it’s not the Batman theme) ♪]

Aaaahhh!

Ha ha ha ha ha ha! Ha!

- He killed an elder. - Bastard!

I'm going to get you, fuzzy headed cock monger.

Ha ha ha ha!

[zapping whoosh]

Aaaah!

[♪ angelic choir ♪]

[car doors slam]

No, Fartbomb!

What?

We gotta bring him back to town so he can face justice.

[sigh]

All right, Kruger.

You've given this country red, white, and blue balls.

Now we're going to make sure you get a happy ending.

[♪ happy ending music ♪]

[crowd cheering]

- Yeah!

My fellow Americans.

Lend me your ears.

We the people should know

what a racist dictator

when we see one.

I have Down's syndrome.

And even I know this asshole is retarded,

not me.

We've made mistakes in this country.

Mistakes we can never make right.

But we have to learn from the past,

or there is no future.

Yeah, we've all been clown raped by this guy right here,

people with disabilities and regular people.

Fucking asshole.

That's right.

All of us have paid the price for electing this ass monkey.

We all got the right to get married, to fuck as people

to fuck as people with disabilities

chase ass, get drunk, and live our lives.

That’s what we all have the right to do.

So fuck trans- and homophobia,

anti-Semitism,

fascism, Islamophobia,

communism and racism.

We can make our world

a better place

if we learn from our own bullshit.

We must acknowledge our mistakes

and move forward into a bright future for everyone.

Way to go, Billy.

[crowd cheering]

But before I move forward,

we have some unfinished business to take care of.

So stick around, folks.

This is gonna be fun.

Are you ready?

Yeah. Oh, yeah.

Yeah.

You know what they say.

Hair today...

You wouldn't dare.

gone with the wind.

Hey...

What have we here?

It's your trusty old hairbrush.

You won’t be needing this anymore.

No more hair to brush.

But I have an idea.

You're long overdue for a good spanking.

What?

[crowd laughing]

Not so fast, mister.

Let's see what you're hiding.

[uproarious laughter]

That's gross.

It's like looking into a Ziploc bag

that's been crumpled a thousand times and thrown into the ocean.

Small, yet able to

kill baby squids and octopi.

Oh. It's like that.

Hey, look at that little guy.

What a teeny weeny wiener!

You motherfucker!

Watch your mouth, pal. Get over my knee.

You gotta be fucking kidding me.

(Kruger) Ow! Ow!

Come on.

Oh! Ow!

Ow! Oh!

Now I'm gonna barbecue your ass in molasses.

Now your butt is nice and hot.

Bring all the molasses.

Ah! Ah!

[hissing]

- Oh my God.

Oh my God!

Ah ah!

Now, you little rapscallion,

have you settled down?

Fuck you.

Such language.

Maybe I should put you over my knee again?

No no no no no no! No more spanking,

no more spanking,

please please please please.

Have you learned your lesson?

Yes.

Yes what?

Yes, sir.

What was that? I can't hear you.

Yes, sir.

What was that, soldier?

Sir! Yes, sir!

More, more, more, more!

More, more, more, more!

Well, folks,

he says he's learned his lesson.

Do you think he's had enough punishment?

No, more!

Fartbomb. Bring on the Nair.

No! No! No! No, not the Nair!

I’m gonna fuck your follicles, bitch!

Anything but the Nair!

Please!

This is for Cindy.

Aaaaah!

You fucking pricks!

Look what you've done.

More! More! More!

I’m melting!

Oh, what a world.

What a world.

Who thought a retard like you could destroy

my beautiful bigotry?

Look out! Look out.

I'm going. I'm going.

[hissing and sizzling]

Ooh, man. Wow.

I always knew he was full of shit,

but who guessed that much?

[♪ pensive music ♪]

Hi, Dana.

I knew you and Manatee Lover

had some chemistry going on,

but he won't be coming back.

He got blown up.

So me and the guys have decided

to give you the only thing

left of your lover.

[Dana snorts]

[grunting]

Oh, come on, Billy, let's get out of here, man.

This place is bullshit.

We gotta go.

[♪ news stinger ♪]

Breaking headline news.

President Donald J. Kruger was unceremoniously divested of his silver mane

and administered a sound spanking with his own hairbrush

by new national hero Billy Bates.

Yeah! Yeah!

Yes. Yes.

Kruger has left behind a legacy.

A legacy of the abuse of a nation,

the attempted ruination of an entire planet,

and the mistreatment of every single minority group known to man,

as well as being, in my personal opinion, a smelly pile of shit.

The famous Kruger hairbrush will be on display

at the Smithsonian Institute in Washington, D.C..

In related news,

all concentration institutions will be immediately closed

and their prisoners will be set free.

In more news, missing political adversaries

John McBain, Mallory Minton and Derek Osama have been located

close to starvation, but still alive in a slave labor camp in Russia.

Finally, a special video titled The Ignominious Demise of Donald J. Kruger

will be distributed free,

whether people voted against him or supported him, like the late Kanye West.

Wait, isn't Kanye West still alive?

Nigga, please.

So, Billy, what do you think you're going to do now?

I think I’ll fix up Nate’s house to live in.

He did a lot for me.

How about you, Will?

Well, you know,

me and Raven going to go steady.

Damn. For reals?

What can I tell you?

I have a thing for guys in wheelchairs.

Oh, it turns out they make me so hot.

You know,

once you go wheelchair, you never go back.

Oh, whoa!

Now, Cindy and I can return to my RV.

And I can go back to pro wrestling and crime fighting.

Not so fast, hot stuff.

I'm horny, and that's a crime you've got to start fighting right now.

I need the real thing.

Oh! Oh!

Fartbomb!

Carmen, how do you feel

about staying here with me?

Ooh. How do you feel about me taking you to bed

and riding you like a wild stallion all night long?

I feel like this

is the beginning of a beautiful friendship.

Oh, yeah, I know it is.

I know it is.

Bye.

[♪ “Chromosome Crusaders” by Keith Jones plays ♪]

♪ Look ♪

♪ they see my human existence ♪

♪ as a reminder ♪

♪ of what is insufficient ♪

♪ so they get clever ♪

♪ by defining better ♪

♪ by claiming I'm lesser ♪

♪ yeah I get it, it's an indignity ♪

♪ to actually greet wit no conclusion drawn ♪

♪ for just vibe me and mine got targets on us ♪

♪ plus bounties on our pelts ♪

♪ for standing up for us ♪

♪ and against what they got planning for us ♪

♪ yup da script don’t include downies and crips ♪

♪ 21 chromosome wit da extra drip yup ♪

♪ we want all to be free ♪

♪ especially my fam and ♪

♪ those thats gotta fight just like me ♪

♪ here comes da revolutionary ♪

♪ rollin squad deep in these streets ♪

♪ it’s quite necessary ♪

♪ peep we gotta watch each other sixes ♪

♪ cause all skin folk aint kin folk ♪

♪ some be snitches ♪

♪ Nothin' can save you ♪

♪ Nothin' can save you ♪

♪ Is it the chromosome crusaders ♪

♪♪♪

♪ Nothin' can save you ♪

♪ You ain't safe in these streets ♪

♪ The chromosome crusaders ♪

♪ How ya say we don’t belong in a place ♪

♪ dat you stole it from the nations first ♪

♪ dats millennium of generations ♪

♪ watching y’all actively erasing ♪

♪ heritage and culture ♪

♪ turned mascots at gas stops by ♪

♪ colonial vultures ♪

♪ giving praise to enslavers ♪

♪ wit confederate sculptures on a freedom premise ♪

♪ ugly laws and eugenics for us huh ♪

♪ how dat fit in da scheme ya pitch ♪

♪ at least we can smell da bull y’all talkin ♪

♪ hear da whistles to get da dogs barkin ♪

♪ gon leave ya stretched ♪

♪ when dem liberators start sparkin ♪

♪ but of course y’all fall back to ya tried and true ♪

♪ if they get their freedom ♪

♪ they’ll take yours from you ♪

♪ you da softest fake ♪

♪ tough guys I’ve ever seen ♪

♪ trying to gatekeep the dream ♪

♪ so dats why we here da most unlikely team ♪

♪♪♪

♪ Nothin' can save you ♪

♪ The chromosome crusaders ♪

♪♪♪

♪ Nothin' can save you ♪

♪ You ain't safe in these streets ♪

♪ The chromosome crusaders ♪

♪ We got lovers of da manatees ♪

♪ Fart Bomb's ♪

♪ superhero flex ♪

♪ Carmen and Raven on deck ♪

♪ Alex, Chief, John da Aspie ♪

♪ then last me Will and Billy Badass ♪

♪ comin' to whop dat ass ♪

♪ hatin' fuckers stuck on ya isms and ists ♪

♪ yet insist you embody the ♪

♪ perfect example of ♪

♪ how dem dat follow should strive to be ♪

♪ especially because it need y’all ♪

♪ to get rid of undesirables ♪

♪ dat ain’t like ya ♪

♪ supremacy addicts ponytails or tangerine man ♪

♪ ya just gotta have it ♪

♪ movin wit absolute malice but we da savage ♪

♪ ableism and racism ♪

♪ ya can’t seem to kick da habit ♪

♪ feel fo ya bruv ♪

♪ shit gotta go ♪

♪ wit drop kicks and shoves ♪

♪ revolution won’t be live streamed ♪

♪ will be live I mean ♪

♪ ya witnessing it live, na mean? ♪

♪♪♪

♪ Nothin' can save you ♪

♪♪♪

♪ Nothin' can save you ♪

♪ The chromosome crusaders ♪

♪ Nothin' can save you ♪

♪ You ain't safe in these streets ♪

♪ The chromosome crusaders ♪

♪ Nothin' can save you ♪

♪ Nothin' can save you ♪

♪ The chromosome crusaders ♪

♪ Nothin' can save you ♪

♪ You ain't safe in these streets ♪

♪ The chromosome crusaders ♪

[♪ “Down with the Down” by Sam Dyer plays ♪]

♪ Somebody got there ♪

♪ Somebody got a freakin hold of me ♪

♪ My heart is racing ♪

♪ I got my own aces ♪

♪ I got my own beat ♪

♪ You’d better watch your tone Smith ♪

♪ I will knock you out ♪

♪ This is my town ♪

♪ We are number one ♪

♪ Above all the sound ♪

♪ I'm Down with the Down ♪

♪ You are on the top of the top ♪

♪ You better shut the *uck up ♪

♪ Back side one side ♪

♪ This is my side ♪

♪ You are not better than me ♪

♪ Because upside is not down with the down ♪

♪ This is not south ♪

♪ I live in your street ♪

♪ In this side of town ♪

♪ He’s chasin' me the back alley ♪

♪ Because he’s born with ♪

♪ Down with the Down ♪

♪ You’re going upstairs with me ♪

♪ I’m calling all the girls over ♪

♪ I’m calling all the girls for a date ♪

♪ I will pick you up until eight ♪

♪ You call me an office man ♪

♪ I will put your face in the sand ♪

♪ So who you calling me, Smith? A rag? ♪

♪ Look whose cross, you look like a pork ♪

♪ I will trip you, trip you ♪

♪ I will throw you on the ground ♪

♪ I will put you Down with the Down ♪

♪ Please I’m begging you, don’t do this ♪

♪ I can’t see my own feet ♪

♪ I can’t see my own fleet ♪

♪ Real Down is Down ♪

♪ All welcome is Down ♪

♪ This is my town ♪

♪ I live with my friends, what this sound ♪

♪ This is my pad ♪

♪ I want to get my beat ♪

♪ Get outta here ♪

♪ I live with a beat ♪

♪ I’m not big ♪

♪ You wasn’t get a daddy ♪

♪ As we spoke I wouldn’t be a haddy ♪

♪ Get outta here ♪

♪ I love no smoke ♪

♪ Get outta here unless you get choked ♪

♪ It wasn’t a joke ♪

♪ I want to get a beat ♪

♪ Get outta here♪

♪ I’m Down with the Down ♪

♪ This is my beat ♪

♪ This is my self ♪

♪ This is my town ♪

♪ This is my Down ♪

♪ It’s what I got here ♪

♪ This is my rhymes ♪

♪ Get outta here ♪

♪ This is my time ♪

♪ I be Big Daddy smoke ♪

♪ I will catcha you later ♪

♪ Peace ♪