Original subtitles

This is an ABC color presentation.

"The Adventures of Ozzie and Harriet," starring

the entire Nelson family.

Here's Ozzie.

Here's Harriet.

Here's David.

Here's Rick.

Also starring in tonight's episode, here's June.

Oh. Hi, Dave.

Hi.

How did things go in court?

Oh, pretty good.

Did we win, or did you lose?

Neither.

They got it postponed until next week.

Mr. Harris dropped these out for you to check.

OK.

And Mrs. Peterson is going to call

a little later this afternoon.

Oh, and June called.

You're invited your folks out for dinner tonight.

What the heck is that?

Oh, the superintendent's in there with a couple of workmen.

A couple of workmen? What for?

I don't know. Something about the pipes.

They're looking for a leak in the fire sprinkler system.

Gee, I didn't even know we had one.

Can't they do that tonight or over the weekend or something?

I don't know.

He said it's liable to burst any minute.

Oh.

That's ridiculous.

Well, he was right.

- Oh, hi. - Hi, Pop.

Hey, I'm sorry I'm late.

I had to go home and change clothes.

Well, that's OK. You're not late.

Your mother and June are upstairs.

As long as you're here, give me your opinion on this.

Gee, it looks pretty horrible.

That was my reaction.

What is it?

I guess it's supposed to be a lamp of some sort.

Where did it come from?

I imagine your mother picked it up at an antique shop.

- Hi. - Hi.

- Hi. - Hi, honey.

How long have you been here?

Oh, just a couple of minutes.

Pop was showing me the new lamp.

Oh, well, not exactly.

I-- uh, where did you get it?

Well, June brought it over.

Oh.

It's very interesting.

Don't you think so, Dave? Yeah.

I guess it is that. It's all right.

You can relax, fellas.

It's for the rummage sale down at the Women's Club.

Why didn't you tell me that when I first came in?

Because you didn't ask me.

Where did you get it anyway?

Oh, from one of our neighbors in the apartment, Mrs. Davis.

She just lives down the hall.

In fact, I talked to just about everyone in the building.

They said if they found anything,

they'd leave it at our house. Well, look.

Why don't you just take it on down to the Woman's Club?

Oh, OK.

While you're at it, you might as well

take that suit I wore to work today.

Oh? What's the matter with it?

Well, something happened to the sprinkler system

down in the office, and I got drenched.

Well, did you get it fixed?

Not yet. Evidently, it's quite a job.

It's going to take a couple of days.

Oh, wonderful.

Then you can take tomorrow off.

I'm afraid not.

I've got an awful lot of work to do.

Well, then you'd better work at home.

It'd be fun. Yeah.

That'd really be something, wouldn't it?

Well, thanks a lot.

What do you mean by that?

Never mind.

Can I help you with anything, Mom?

No thanks, dear.

I think we're just about ready.

Uh, did I, uh, say something wrong?

Oh, don't ask me.

I've only been married for 30 years.

Are you feeling all right?

Well, sure.

I feel fine.

Why do you say that?

Oh, I just thought there might be something wrong.

Well, there is.

OK, then. What is it?

Well, why don't you want to work here tomorrow?

What?

Well, I thought it would be fun to have you at home,

and you just laughed at me.

I wasn't laughing at you.

I was laughing at the idea.

Well, it was my idea, and that's just the same

as laughing at me. No, it isn't.

Look, I'd love to stay home here and work,

but it just wouldn't be practical.

Well, that's not a very good argument,

especially for a lawyer.

Well, I usually have a little more time to prepare a case.

The thing is, you just don't have a case.

Give me one good reason why you can't work here tomorrow?

Well, first of all--

Miss Edwards could you relay all your important phone calls.

Your clients could go by the house if you wanted to.

I could fetch you coffee for your coffee break.

And I promise, I won't get in your way.

How about it? What do you say?

OK, OK.

- Did you have enough breakfast? - Oh, yeah.

It was fine, thanks.

Well, I better get going.

Where?

To the living room to work.

- Hey, wait a minute. - What's the matter?

You didn't kiss me goodbye.

Goodbye.

Goodbye.

Oh.

I'm sorry, honey.

I thought you were in the kitchen.

Oh, I just brought you some more coffee.

Oh. Thanks.

Can I get you anything else?

Oh, that's OK.

I think I got everything right here.

Just sit down now and be comfortable.

Here, let me put your feet up for you.

Oh, that's all right, honey, really.

Oh, would you like a pillow?

No, thanks.

I have to get up and phone Miss Edwards.

Well, what for?

Can I do whatever it is? No, that's OK.

I just have to call her and tell her

that I'm working at home here. Oh.

Well, I'll get the phone for you.

I'm sorry.

I'm not sick, you know, honey.

It's my office that's out of commission.

Oh, I know.

Hello?

Oh, hi, Joanne.

It's Dave.

Yeah, just a second.

She's right here.

I think it shook her up a little when a man answered.

Hello?

Yeah, he's working at home today.

They're doing some repairs down at the office.

Yeah.

In fact, I have to get right off the phone

because he has a call to make.

Oh, yeah.

Tuesday would be fine.

Well, why don't you just drop it off here?

OK.

Well, I'll talk to you later.

Oh, no nothing serious, just some water pipes broke

or something.

She did?

No kidding.

When did that happen?

Oh, really?

Oh.

Well, look, you can tell me about it later.

I can't just hang up on her.

Tell her there's somebody at the door.

Well, I can't tell her a lie.

Yes, I'm still here.

No kidding.

Oh, Joanne, there's somebody's at the door.

I'll call you back later.

- What are you doing? - Nothing.

I was just looking at you.

I don't get a chance to watch you work very often.

Oh.

Hey.

I'm just giving you a little kiss.

Watch it.

I'm not used to that while I'm working.

Better not be.

It was kind of nice, though.

I'll have to speak to my secretary about that.

Never mind.

Uh, look, honey.

Don't you have something to do, like go

to the market or something?

I guess I should run down to the market.

Dave?

Dave? Yeah?

What should I get?

What?

I mean, what would you like for lunch?

I don't care.

At the rate I'm going, I probably

won't have time for lunch anyway.

Well, of course you will.

I'll get something real nice.

How about a tuna fish salad?

- Fine. - Fine.

You weren't even listening.

What?

Never mind.

I'm sorry, honey.

I'm just trying to get some work done here.

I know, and I'm just leaving.

Oh, and don't worry about being grumpy.

I forgive you.

Oh.

Oh, hi, Mrs. Nelson.

I just stopped by to tell you you're

going to have some new neighbors, the Fergusons.

Oh, really?

How nice.

You wouldn't like to come in and have a cup of coffee,

would you?

Well, yes, but I can only stay a minute.

Oh, hi, Rick.

Come on in. What's the matter?

You're supposed to whisper while he's working?

He's not exactly working.

Sleeping Beauty.

Gee, I hate to wake him up.

Oh, do you have to?

Yeah.

I have a couple of papers he has to sign.

Oh, well go ahead then.

I'll get some coffee.

Dave?

Boss?

Hmm?

What?

Rick?

What are you doing here?

How come you're not working?

Are you kidding?

Look who's talking.

Yeah.

I guess I must dozed off for a couple of minutes.

Looks like this working at home really agrees with you.

Are you kidding?

I can't get any work done around here.

Well, why not?

Well, it's June.

She means well but just keeps interrupting me.

I can't get anything done.

It looked like you're doing pretty well when I came in.

I'll make up for it tomorrow.

Oh, that's kind of what I want to tell you.

What's that?

Well, it looks like they ran into a little more trouble

than they expected down at the office.

You're kidding.

No, it's going to take them at least an extra day to finish--

maybe two more.

Oh, great.

Yeah, they started in the outer office today.

The place is really a mess.

Look, maybe it would be a good idea if you and Connie come

over here and work tomorrow. OK.

Why don't you go back to the office

now and pick up any of the stuff we'll need?

Oh, do you need any extra blankets

or a couple of more pillows?

Dave?

Dave?

Dave?

Oh, I'm sorry, honey.

Did I wake you up?

Well, no, not exactly.

I just missed you.

What are you doing?

Oh, I wasn't very tired.

I guess I got too much sleep this afternoon.

It's awful late.

You better come to bed.

Oh, I will in a couple minutes.

I just have a few more things to finish up.

It's my fault you didn't get your work done today, isn't it?

No, it isn't.

Not any more than mine.

Well, I promise tomorrow will be different.

I won't even talk to you.

You won't even know I'm here.

Good.

Uh, I mean-- look, honey, why don't you go on into bed,

and I'll be in in a minute? OK.

I won't say another word.

Good.

Would you like some hot chocolate?

Sorry.

Forget I said that.

Yes, that's right.

OK, thank you.

- Who was that? - The exchange.

We'll be getting our calls here today.

Oh, good.

Morning.

Hi, Rick.

Hi, June.

Hi, Rick.

- Where do you want these? - Oh.

Why don't you put them right here.

Look at the boss.

It's 10:30, and he's still awake.

Haven't you got a class to go to or something?

OK, but I'll be back.

See you later.

Bye.

Were you able to contact Judge Willoughby?

Mm-mmm.

He'll be stopping by in about an hour.

Oh, good Hope he doesn't mind.

No, evidently not.

Mrs. Bradley's going to come by too.

Said it was no trouble at all. Good.

Have we got her papers ready? Yeah.

They're all right here.

I think we'd better get started on these letters first.

OK.

The first one goes to Charles Gordon.

Dear Mr. Gordon.

Let's see.

Where was I?

Dear Mr. crash, clatter, bang.

- Hello, Mrs. Bradley. - Hello, David.

- Won't you come in? - Thank you.

Hey, I'm sorry you had to come all the way over to the house

here. Perfectly all right.

I believe you know Miss Edwards.

Hello. Yes, indeed.

How are you, Mrs. Bradley?

Won't you sit down?

Thank you.

Here are the contracts.

I believe everything's in order.

There is a correction on page two there.

It needs to be initialed.

All right.

My goodness, something smells good.

I believe my wife's baking a cake.

Oh.

Smells like orange.

I wonder if she's using orange rind?

Gee, I really don't know.

Oh, smells so good.

I'd love to meet her.

Oh, sure.

June?

- Am I making too much noise? - Oh, no.

We just smelled the cake baking. Oh, gee.

I'm sorry. Oh, no.

That's OK.

Mrs. Bradley just wanted to meet you.

This is my wife. Well, how do you do?

How do you do?

I was just wondering what kind of a cake it is you're baking?

It smells so good.

Oh, well, thank you.

It's a spice cake.

I thought so.

I used to make those all the time.

What kind of a frosting are you going to put on it?

Well, I haven't decided yet.

I thought maybe a plain white frosting.

Yes, that's nice.

Actually, I've never made a spice cake before.

I usually try and stick to something simple,

like a chocolate layer cake.

Yes, but it is fun to experiment now and then.

I wonder if I might see your kitchen?

Oh, certainly.

- Hello there, Dave. - Morning, Judge.

Come on in. Thank you.

I hope this wasn't too inconvenient for you.

Oh, no, no, not at all.

In fact, I'm anxious to get this thing settled.

Well, I'm talking to a client, but I'll be right with you.

Or I was talking to a client.

Where did they go?

They're in the kitchen. Morning, Judge Willoughby.

- Miss Edwards. - Uh, sit down, Judge.

I'll be right with you. Certainly.

Oh, David, you're just in time.

Would you hand me the powdered sugar, please?

- Oh, sure. - Thank you.

Mrs. Bradley just insisted on helping me with the frosting.

Isn't that nice? Oh, yeah.

Sure is.

I'll sift the sugar, and you can squeeze the lemons.

That's all, David.

We'll call you if we need anything else.

I might as well go out and talk to the judge.

Oh, darn.

What's matter?

Well, the disposal won't work.

Well, just push that red button under the sink.

Gee, I'm sorry to keep you waiting.

Oh, that's OK.

David?

Well, hi, Judge Willoughby.

Mrs. Nelson.

David, the disposal still won't work.

Shall I call a plumber? Oh, gee.

I don't know, honey. Whatever you want to do.

I'm awful busy.

Well, let me take a look at it.

Disposals are my specialty.

Oh, that's OK. We can call the plumber.

Nonsense.

I fix ours all the time.

Do you have a broom handle?

Well, yes.

Oh, Mrs. Bradley.

It's Judge Willoughby.

Oh, how do you do?

How do you do, Mrs. Bradley?

Eh, now let me give this a couple of turns.

- Oh, let me do that, Judge. - What?

And spoil my fun?

Not on your life.

I'm sorry, dear, but I didn't seem

to find the vanilla extract. Oh, dear.

I guess it's not up there. Oh, dear.

Well, if it's not up there--

Let me give her another turn or two.

I guess we're out of it.

Hmm.

Well, let me look underneath here.

Oh, why don't I just call a plumber?

No, no.

I'll have this thing figured out in a minute.

Yeah.

It's a different make than ours.

Just wait till you taste this. You'll love it.

Yes ma'am.

Well, everybody's busy in there.

Why don't we finish that letter we started about two hours ago?

Oh, gee, Dave.

Would you mind holding it for a few minutes?

Mrs. Bradley asked me to run down to the store

and pick up a bottle of vanilla extract.

Oh, my goodness.

Now, don't worry.

I'll have it fixed in a jiffy.

Oh, thank you.

Let me--

Well, thanks a lot, Judge. Thanks for everything.

Hope the suit dries OK.

Oh, I'm sure it will.

I'll send you a bill for my services in the morning.

You do and I'll report to the plumber's union

for moonlighting.

Boy, this is rapidly developing into a lost day.

I feel like I haven't done anything.

You practically haven't.

Don't tell me Mrs. Bradley forgot to sign these contracts.

No, she said she signed them tomorrow.

She's bringing June back a couple of recipes.

Oh, darn.

I'm sorry.

I didn't mean to bother you. That's OK.

What is it?

Oh, well, I was just going to do a little ironing

in the bedroom.

In the bedroom?

So I wouldn't disturb you.

Look, honey.

I thought you were going out today.

Oh, I just thought I'd iron a few of these shirts.

Well, it's such a beautiful day.

Why don't you go someplace?

I'm not sure I know how to take that.

You don't have to push.

Would you like some more coffee?

Oh, no, thanks, Mom.

I guess I'd better be running along.

Well, where are you going?

Oh, I don't know.

I'm not going home, that's for sure.

Oh, come on, now.

It can't be that bad.

Well, you weren't there.

It was awful.

I tried to stay out of the, way but somehow I just couldn't.

Yeah, I know what you mean.

Well, I won't be any more trouble to him today.

I'm not going to go back home.

I'm not going to phone him.

I'm not even going to mention his name.

That's the spirit.

We'll be back in our office tomorrow,

so why don't you stop by sometime in the afternoon?

OK, Mr. Benson.

Thanks for calling.

Bye.

Would you like to sign this?

You mean we have a letter all ready to go?

Right.

Maybe I ought to just sign it, frame it, and hang it

on the wall. It's a shame to mail it out.

Oh, come on, now. It hasn't been that bad.

Oh, I'll get it.

Hi.

Does this mean me?

It's just for June.

Hey, what's all that stuff?

Don't ask me.

It was just out in the hall here.

It doesn't look too attractive sitting out

in front of our office.

It looks like we're having a rummage sale.

Hey, yeah.

That's it.

You mean we are having a rummage sale?

No, but the woman's club is.

June told all the neighbors to leave the stuff off here,

and she'd take it down to the woman's club for them.

She probably forgot all about it.

I think the sales tonight, isn't it?

Yeah, I think it is.

And it's a cinch she won't be back in time

to get it down there either.

You mean were elected?

We're elected.

See you at the regular office tomorrow?

OK.

We'll be there even if the whole office is gone.

OK. Good night.

- Night. - So long.

See you tomorrow.

Hi.

Oh, hi.

You timed that just right.

I've been hiding out in the hall for 10 minutes.

Oh, come on, now. You didn't have to do that.

Well, I didn't want to take any chances.

Aren't you proud of me, I mean, for staying out of your way

all afternoon? Yes, I am.

I didn't cause any trouble, did I?

No, I guess not. Not really.

Well, it wasn't easy.

Took a lot of willpower to stay away, you know?

Well, I guess it did it that.

There's only one catch, though.

What's that?

You have to take me out for dinner.

I should have brought something home, but I forgot my money.

If you recall, I left the house rather hurriedly.

I'm sorry about that.

There is something that you forgot, though.

Oh, what's that?

I'll give you a hint--

the rummage sale. Oh, no.

I didn't forget that.

I almost forgot, but then I remembered.

No, you didn't.

I mean, all that stuff you had the neighbors leave off

at the house here. Yes, I know.

I'm a lot better organized than you think.

See, I had all their names and phone numbers written down

here, and I phoned them from your mother's house.

And told them what?

And told them not disturb you, to take the things right on

down to the women's club.

Wasn't that thoughtful of me?

Oh, hi, Mrs. Lockwood.

Hi, Mrs. Nelson.

Oh, Mr. Nelson, I'm sorry to bother you,

but something awful has happened.

Oh, what's the matter?

You remember I told you the Fergusons were moving

into the next door apartment?

Well, some of their things were stolen right out of the hallway

here.

Don't you worry about a thing.

My husband's a lawyer, and he'll get you some fast action.

Goodness.

Don't you worry about a thing.

Well, thank you.

You're kind of loving is my kind of loving.

My kind of loving is your kind of loving.

Your kisses, they're so thrilling,

and when you hold me, you know I'm willing.

Give your love to me now.

I don't have to tell you what's on my mind.

Ba, da, da, ba.

Cause baby, you know we're two of a kind.

Ba, da, da, ba.

You got something I want, and I want it so bad.

Ba, da, da, ba.

Come on, come on, give me all the loving you have.

Yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah.

Your kind of loving is my kind of loving.

My kind of loving is your kind of loving.

Your kisses, they're so thrilling.

And when you hold me, you know I'm willing.

Give your love to me, now.

Girl, it's time that you stop shying away.

Ba, da, da, ba.

Yeah, yeah.

Stop listening to what the others all say.

Ba, da, da, ba.

Girl, you're out of sight.

Girl, you're out of sight.

We'll do it up right.

We'll do it up right.

Let me hold you tight.

Let me hold tight.

Ah, tonight's the night.

Yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah.

You're kind of loving is my kind of loving.

My kind of loving is your kind of loving.

Oh, I need your loving, baby, uh-huh, so bad.

Tonight's "Adventures of Ozzie and Harriet"

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