Original subtitles

Distributed by Herald Ace & Nippon Herald Films

A Fuji Television Production in cooperation with Melies

Executive Producer Koichi Murakami Produced by Shuji Miyajima & Shinya Kawai

Original Story by Toshihiko Tani Musical Score by Katsuo Ono

Starring Takeshi Kaga & Kaori Momoi

Directed by Yojiro Takita

A man came to Amsterdam, Holland.

He encountered a wonderful mansion.

"Whose home is this?" he asked a stranger.

With gestures, you know, because he couldn't speak Dutch.

The stranger answered,

"Iku-weto-nito."

The man started feeling miserable.

He thought, "compared to Mr. Iku-weto-nito,

I have no money, nor place to stay for tonight."

The man went to a canal and thought, "Why not kill myself?"

Then, passing along the canal, he saw a boat with a coffin.

He asked, “whose funeral is it?”

He was surprised by the answer.

Mr. Iku-weto-nito.

Correct.

He began to find it silly.

"Even if a man can live in a mansion, it has no meaning if he dies.

At the very least I'm alive and not dead."

So his life was saved.

Thanks to Mr. Iku-weto-nito.

Hey, how do you do that?!

Hey, how do you do that?!

Wait, here comes the story's punchline.

I don't care, Dad! Tell me how you do it!

You know what iku-weto-nito means?

Okay, got it, got it...

THE YEN FAMILY

Noriko!

Brother!

You look great!

Sorry to burden you.

Not at all.

Come on in.

How big have Taro and Terumi become? In elementary school yet?

What are you talking about? Years ago. Don't make me laugh...

Hajime, please do us the favor.

Don't be so formal.

We'd like to have Mother in the apartment...

but it's too small.

Our house should be finished next month.

It's just for a month.

So sorry for the trouble.

Don't be silly, Brother.

She's our mother, too.

She's very welcome.

It's a poor gift...

Thank you.

Let's drink it tonight.

That'd be great.

It's homegrown.

We picked the grapes

and made the juice ourselves.

Terrific, thank you.

Mother.

Noriko, you've grown.

Such a big girl.

I'm not Noriko!

Noriko is Mom!

You've certainly grown.

Mother.

I'm so thirsty.

Mother...

Mother!

Please don't, Mother.

I mentioned over the phone that she's lost a few marbles.

Thinks I'm her dead husband.

This is terrible...

Don't worry. It's perfectly alright.

Don't!

Control yourself!

Is it a bit high?

Mother seems so relaxed.

Noriko looks happy, too.

Excuse me.

No, don't get up.

You said you're staying 2 days?

Here's your bill for today.

Make yourselves at home.

Good night then.

Good night.

Invoice: dinner, coffee, gas, electricity, bath, restroom, etc

He's joking.

Excuse us.

Massage fee. Taro did 15 minutes.

I did 15 minutes plus a 10 minute extension.

It's all itemized.

Looking forward to tomorrow too. Good night.

Good night.

Good night.

I'm sorry.

Service charge?

What?

Good morning!

Sleep well?

I'll put the bedding away. Take your time.

Terumi, don't look.

No, you can't there...

It's a morning call.

We've had a big demand lately for some good squealing,

so we're also outsourcing jobs to the neighbors.

Oh yes, there!

Hey, don't expose your willy!

It's twice as much as a normal morning call.

It's booming and a great part-time job.

Yeah...

Slowly...

Don't worry. We get a 20% referral fee.

Referral fee?

There's lots of lonely men around.

Why the dog whining in the mornings?

Dummy.

She's working.

Come on.

Good morning.

Time's up, you awake? Thank you, see you tomorrow.

I missed one.

Hello.

It's me, Akemi.

No!

I couldn't!

Pink. The same ones all week.

Of course I am.

They're tight...

Just a minute.

My panties are so tight...

- Kimura, here you go. - Right.

Today's cut.

Thank you.

Great sound, eh?

Certainly is.

- See you then. - Bye.

Excuse me.

- Back already? - Yeah.

Sleep in, don't mind us.

- Alright, newspapers! - Yes.

In rank!

The Call!

- 1 yen! - 10 yen!

- 100 yen! - 1,000 yen!

10,000 yen!

We're late this morning.

Taro, we're short. Go get 15 from Mom.

Yes.

Wake up.

The Kimuras are at it again.

Greedy bastards.

Hey, Dad.

Who's next?

- Who is it? - Mr. Shozaburo.

Hey, Taro.

Excuse me,

but would you mind opening the blind?

Morning everyone!

Good morning.

Don't go dying on me today.

The same old sequence.

Line up, please.

Mr. Tsune.

No running, now.

That's 110 yen.

- Mr. Tokijiro. - Yes.

You've got 24.

That's 120 yen.

Mrs. Matsukichi.

It's so busy, Mother. You mustn't stay idle.

There's the knife.

Alright?

Since setting up the business we've had the local

seniors delivering newspapers.

It's a 50/50 split.

That's 200 yen. Off you go.

They'd do it for nothing.

Senility prevention. Keeps them active.

And puts a bit of money in their pockets.

Get it?

That's 200 yen. See you.

Here's today's tidbit.

Thank you!

Would you mind?

It's burdock for our catering business.

Burdock?

Newspapers and burdock at 630 yen.

Thank you.

That homemade taste is a big seller.

Catering business? Deliveries?

Darling!

Try this, Mother made it.

- Delicious. - Isn't it?

They'll love that.

- Noriko. - Yes?

Is Mother cooking?

Yes, we're just so busy. Here's 200 yen, Mother.

What the hell?

Mother's ill!

Excuse me.

Where are the wild lemons?

It goes perfectly with the stew.

That's right, lemons...

See her?

Look.

I did.

Noriko's mother.

Both are beautiful.

Good work!

Grannies and Grandpas!

You'll all be dead if you don't hurry it up!

Filthy!

See you there!

Late today.

Good morning!

What's for lunch?

Stew, croquettes and pork rolls. With burdock.

And sausage. Full of goodness.

Wait!

Thank you, have a good day.

20 yen short!

Mr. Komatsu!

You owe me 20 yen! Mr. Komatsu!

Hello.

Good morning.

Thank you.

Please.

Are you sure?

I insist. It's on special today.

Morning, Kimura here.

Mr. Yamada?

What is it?

Are you alright?

Mrs. Kimura!

Don't.

- I've always loved you... - Awake, were you?

What a strange way to sleep.

I can't get you out of my mind.

I get palpitations.

Half asleep, were you?

Is your alarm clock broken?

Why not try our morning call service?

5,000 yen per month.

Amen.

Good morning.

Good morning!

- Good morning. - Good morning.

- Thank you. - Thanks.

Morning, Takakura.

Has your wife decided to work?

We're overflowing with morning calls.

What do you think my wife is?

That's all I hear all damn morning.

Think of the children!

Here.

Thank you.

You're a money-grubber, but there are limits.

Once a man's enslaved by money, it's the end.

- Thank you so much. - Have a good day.

- Goodbye. - Take care.

See you tomorrow.

Hey, listen.

Still got that razor?

Yes.

30 yen a shot.

Here.

Would you like some hair tonic?

What do you have?

Gatsby, Auslese and Eroica.

I'll pass.

Mr. Kimura has some kind of sickness.

You had no idea?

Erotic phone calls.

The catering service, delivery service...

They'll do anything to pinch a penny.

They have the whole neighborhood involved.

I wonder how he keeps his job.

Good morning.

Morning.

Looks delicious.

I threw in a croquette and pork roll.

Are you in debt?

The other way around, actually.

We'd like to start money-lending but we're so busy.

Deliver this, please.

I've drawn a map, don't get lost again.

Yes.

Off you go.

At 65 they get a free bus pass.

You've been there before. Have a good day.

Same day, cut-rate deliveries.

It's booming.

Here, Grandpa.

What's with you all?

It's not normal!

Okay, this bigger one. It's fragile, so please...

What about the children?

They need a more human life.

We're quite human.

Only humans use money.

Ever seen a rich monkey? Or a penguin in debt?

Does your husband have a proper job?

For 16 years. Never late, not a day off.

They gave him an award.

Good morning.

Morning.

I made the copies.

Thanks.

They're exam notes for the student next door.

Here.

Thank you.

- Good morning. - Morning.

I've delivered the lunch boxes.

Good man.

The promotion list will be ready soon.

Mr. Yamashina from Sales ordered a copy.

Did he?

And Ms. Satomi wants the time-card service.

Here's her month in advance.

You're brilliant.

A born salesman.

I'm glad I met you.

- Morning. - Morning.

When they first transferred me here,

I thought I was being passed over,

but now, it's like heaven.

Exactly.

At least we can do what we want.

A guaranteed salary with social benefits.

Health insurance, check-ups,

office equipment use and free stationery.

Plus all these potential customers.

They even give out perfect attendance awards!

No complaints there!

It's too good to be true.

DATA ROOM

Mr. Yoshida and Ms. Muraki...

are lovers!

And I'm quite sure they've done it...

about 6 times.

Done it?

Slosh, slurp.

Oh, slosh, slurp.

The section chief?

A fortune in hush-money there.

B over 10 times C,

equals B over A times C.

Got that?

Yes.

You sure?

Yes.

I don't care if you don't.

Let's try it with numbers.

2 over 5 times 4 equals?

Hey, it's the junk man!

He's a goner!

Come on everybody!

Back to your seats! Where are you going?

Come back! Come ba...

Even you?

One for free.

I'll make it two, then. Two for free.

Two? You gave me three before.

I did? Gave you three?

Let's go! Let's go!

Double strength, super soft toilet paper.

Madam, don't go, don't go.

It's good stuff.

The junk man, Mr. Marutomi, is at the main gate.

Children's club, please gather there.

What the hell?

It's him alright!

Sneaky thief!

Cheap crook!

You can't operate here!

We get this whole area!

No trespassers allowed!

Patronize the children's club!

I've got a living to make. Think of that.

Not our business. Get out of here!

Shut up! Shut up!

You're just a bunch of kids!

I'll kick your little asses!

Come on then! Try me!

Get away!

Get away!

Everyone attack!

Don't cross us, mister!

Stop it! Please stop!

That's enough!

My leg's swelling!

Sorry for the hold up.

Should you have an old tire or two,

I'll swap for high quality toilet paper.

I know our flagging children's club was

revitalized by you, Terumi.

Your idea to divide the proceeds was a good one.

All the pupils are members now.

But...

What did you earn from the toilet paper exchange last month?

133,545 yen, sir.

And I gave out 1,283,875 to the others!

Isn't that enough?

That's pocket money for 2 to 3 years.

How would you like to,

using the brains you've got,

concentrate on something more academic?

More academic?

You see...

something pure and unsullied.

You're suggesting purity and innocence?

Purity and innocence attracts perverts.

They'd leave me in tatters,

then strangle me and dump me in the river.

It would be all over the papers.

Is that what you're recommending, teacher?

We'll quit together.

We promised.

I know.

What's wrong?

We want to quit the harmonica club.

Quit?

Both of you?

I'll never reach his skill and dedication.

I give up.

Give it your all, Kimura.

Excuse me.

Mr. Takakura, good evening.

You get the Mainichi paper, right?

Considered the swap-scam?

You switch newspaper subscriptions every month

and get a lifetime supply of TOP detergent.

In your case, suppose you die at 75,

that means you'll be saving 248,400 yen.

You're a lucky man!

No thanks.

Leave me alone.

Back already?

- Good evening. - Welcome back.

Oh, good job.

Anyway, it's enough.

You only care about coins, day and night.

It makes me also feel cheap.

What's money?

Where's your self respect?

A man is above such pettiness.

See you.

I thought so.

He likes you.

I've known since March.

That speech was for your benefit. Sickening.

He's kind of cute.

Let's go social dancing on Sunday.

- Social dancing? - A studio opened near the station.

Taro.

I danced when I was at school.

You want to learn?

We can't.

We're cleaning drains this weekend.

That's 12,000 yen in the bag.

No, I want to dance.

No, drains.

I'm so relieved.

To meet normal people.

We feel the same.

It's hard to believe you're related.

It's been such a relief for me.

Don't stand on ceremony.

Make yourself at home.

Please do.

No more talk of pennies.

Let's talk of life and enjoyment.

Right, something morally sound.

Ken, where are your manners?

Good evening.

Good evening.

How old are you?

I'm 10.

Same as Taro.

Sturdier kid, too.

In the mood for some shopping?

Another brilliant idea?

How about this?

We buy 1 million yen's worth of gift certificates

for shopping at a department store.

It'll get discounted down to about 940,000 yen.

And then?

The gift certificates are in the form of a hundred 10,000 yen vouchers.

Together we'll go to the department store and spend them.

All 100 vouchers.

But we won't buy anything over 50 yen.

What'll 50 yen buy?

Pencils, erasers... lots of things.

We can get the change in cash, even for just a 50 yen purchase.

That's 9,950 yen.

Right, and it's 100 vouchers, so...

In total, 995,000 yen.

- That's right. - Great!

We're spending 950,000 yen...

so that's a 55,000 yen profit!

Yes, plus we get our purchases!

Let's divide the profits by 4...

13,750 yen each!

For one day. What do you think?

Brilliant! That's my Noriko!

It's good that you're here, Mother.

I don't get it!

Noriko, who's this woman?

I'm not Noriko. Noriko is Mom.

Concentrate.

This is no good!

Darling.

Morning calls at night?

I'm ovulating...

Mother's here.

One month of waiting.

Our dream seems so faraway.

It's all a blessing, you know...

but not here...

You look pleased, don't you?

Noriko, how many thrusts this time?

Oh no, 43 times.

43?

Pay me back 4,300 yen.

I lost 300 yen...

Here, 10...

20...

Three more thrusts would've put me in the black.

- 300 more. - Okay, 300.

1, 2, 3. Always a pleasure.

I wonder why I can't be patient...

But it's quite a lot today, isn't it?

That's the way it goes.

I can't help moving when I feel it.

There weren't that many.

Listen,

it was 118 times when I had Terumi.

And Taro?

3 times?

I remember.

No foreplay. Maybe that's why he's the way he is.

What's the record?

The record? That'd be...

128 times. I guess so.

We did reach 135 once.

That record.

Want to break it?

Darling.

Darling!

I'll be in the black this time.

I'll do my best, too.

Darling.

Hey, Kimura. I'll have a pie.

Curried for me.

- Sorry about this. - And a drink?

You're so generous.

You have a lot.

Come on, guys.

Lend me your notes.

No!

I'll give them back.

I promise.

Senility is a blessing.

Mitsu looks as happy as a child.

Not for me.

What? You're halfway gone already.

There's me and Grandpa,

always racing to be first.

The senile one has it easy.

Not bragging, but I'll win.

Grandma!

Grandma!

Uncle's leaving!

We'll come as soon as the house is finished.

Don't overdo it.

Overdo what?

Forget it.

Mother's too old. Understand?

In the trunk?

I'll take that.

Taro, don't dwell on pennies.

You too, Terumi.

Our regards to Hajime.

- Thanks for everything. - Our pleasure.

- Bye. - Take care.

If only we could've got through to the kids.

From Taro Kimura.

It's from Taro.

Another damn invoice.

He's only 10.

I'm so sorry, Aunt and Uncle.

Please don't tell Mom, Dad and Sister I returned your money.

I'm truly sorry. - Taro

What's it mean?

A saint among sinners!

Don't you see?!

He's still unsullied!

They haven't corrupted him yet, I know it!

He's ashamed of them! He's the only one left with any morals!

However, he doesn't want to appear different.

When he gave his invoice...

I'm sorry.

How courageous.

Thanks for coming today.

- They're all leaving. - Don't worry.

We will close at 5 o'clock.

Please come again.

Dad!

Welcome, Master and Miss Kimura.

Today is... Kimura day!

Mom!

Thanks a lot.

How did you throw this together?

By using all our savings.

Never!

I had a day off today

and worked here as a cleaner.

- Outstanding. - They pay 6,500 per day.

I became friends with the engineer.

He does a test run every night.

- There's no harm in you having a ride. - Exactly.

Dad, you're wonderful!

I'm under stress with the club.

It's a great break.

Children's club, eh?

You're my girl, alright!

I forgot!

I turned a profit!

I showed Ken my notes for 100 yen.

And cleaned for 80 yen.

Fantastic, Taro.

That's right! Both mom and I agree

that you can look after yourself.

So from next month you pay board, too.

You're making 200 to 300 yen a day.

How's 1,500 yen a month sound?

Good idea.

Oh yes.

I'll take you both to a TV station.

Why?

I've registered as an extra.

Wanna go to the studio?

See the stars?

I want to register!

Why not?

Idiot. Why not tell the truth?

Ken took your book and 100 yen.

You cleaned and they robbed you.

Your fibs put you in this mess.

What'll you do?

Those kids take all your money.

I lent it to them.

Terumi! Taro!

Dad! Mom!

- Taro, count it. - Low this month, isn't it?

Not at all.

Don't shuffle it!

I'm not Noriko!

Start with the small stuff.

Look after the pennies. The pounds will look after themselves.

Alright.

From Uncle?

THE NEW TESTAMENT

Those who are eager to be rich fall into temptation,

and numerous thoughtless and hurtful cravings.

In striving for it they have wandered from the faith

and have pierced themselves with much sorrow.

O man of God, do not be a miser.

Uncle, thank you for the Bible.

It's difficult reading,

but I cried as I read it.

I was moved so many, many times.

I think I can get eternal life from God.

Because I hate money.

But I don't want to see Mom and Dad pierced.

My sister, too.

Uncle, what should I do?

On TV they said you can't buy love.

How can I get true love?

Please tell me.

- Taro

That's terrible!

It'll drive me senile.

Well, you know,

I used to be an elementary school music teacher.

Let me try.

Want to join in, Terumi?

You're kidding.

I'm going bottle hunting.

Bye.

Grandma.

Isn't that Noriko?

No, that's Terumi.

Noriko's your mother.

Listen.

Mitsu...

Thank you.

Excellent!

Music is like prayer.

Think of someone you love, and their happiness,

and your playing becomes a prayer.

That's the trick.

And if you don't love anyone?

But you have many.

Your father, mother and sister.

Don't you love them?

Too many possessions and the possessions become master;

the possessor becomes a slave.

That's from Nietzsche.

Taro,

tribulation is the crucible of purity.

I know from experience.

Reading your letter was like

getting one from my younger self.

Taro, are you corresponding with Uncle?

Kind of.

Did you like the show last night?

On TV?

Where the man was not his real father.

The Daiei Drama.

How about us?

I wonder?

Am I really Dad's child?

Silly.

Do you know what time it is?!

Grandma?

Yes, she's acting weird.

She finally got Noriko right.

And she isn't gulping down drinks.

That's not weird, it's normal.

Your mom said so, too.

Until recently she only ever talked of the past.

Now she's talking of tomorrow.

Wants to go traveling

and speaks of the future.

Has she recovered?

Perhaps.

That's great.

Yes, isn't it?

- Come on, let's wrestle! - Stop it!

The human collar!

I just love money.

Counting money made Grandma well.

No time for senility in the counting house.

I wonder.

She's in love.

That's why she got better.

I think money makes us ill.

Here's your order. I'll put it inside.

Thanks.

Your order.

Hello.

Here's your order.

For us?

- Hang on. - What is it?

What's this all about?

You're Mr. Kimura?

I've been paid.

We never ordered.

Asobaya noodle delivery.

What's happening?

Tell me!

I have no idea.

We never order out.

What's going on?

Who ordered all this?!

Hey...

I'm so happy.

I'm so fortunate.

Mitsu.

So much.

It looks delicious.

- Let's all eat. - Mother, tell me you didn't order all this.

You did?

She did.

My savings...

Yours, too.

Mine, too!

My 3,200's gone!

Mother!

It looks delicious.

Far too much to eat.

I'm so fortunate!

I'm so happy!

- How much there? - 100,000.

That's 80 plus...

170,000 total divided by...

How much?

We each owe 43,750 yen.

Why do I owe?!

No!

It can't be helped.

It's too much!

I didn't slave away to buy this slop!

I'll buy a Nintendo!

Might as well waste it myself!

Forget the saving!

Stop it.

I'm too tired to cope.

In striving for wealth they have wandered from the faith

and have pierced themselves with much sorrow.

They're pierced.

They're pierced!

Dad.

Mom.

Lend a hand, we're cutting our losses.

We'll serve soba noodles tomorrow.

It's a moneymaker.

We'll make them ourselves.

Mom.

I'm sorry I snapped before.

It was just as Father said.

This one's yours.

Shit... I'll earn it all back.

No doubt about it.

You shouldn't say shit.

It was all getting too repetitive, anyway.

Grandma gave us the spur we needed.

We have to earn the money back. Now we have a purpose.

Yes, that's right.

Dad...

Do you know about Timote's letter?

Timote?

You mean Timothy? Timote's a shampoo.

The Bible...

I read it as a boy.

Moved me terribly.

Biblically speaking, today was a trial.

You fail the trial and there's no heaven, eh Taro?

Try Jacob next.

Good for you.

Hey, Taro.

The phone.

The phone.

Kimura speaking.

Oh, Brother. What?

Thanks for everything.

Thanks for this.

Truly, thank you.

The renovations have all finished.

Mother can now rest in our fold.

There's no need for that.

Why are we here?

I have a request to make.

Would you let us adopt Taro?

Since we started writing to him,

we've fallen for the boy.

We want a child.

She's past 40.

I guess we can't have our own.

For Taro's sake too, I beg you.

Just a minute.

Adoption? It's all so sudden.

Corresponded?

Taro and Terumi are our beloved children.

Terumi aside, have you noticed Taro recently?

I'm sure he's not my real father.

I enjoy playing with him

but I hate the money-grubbing dad.

I hate him always talking about money.

I couldn't understand Nietzsche well

but I don't want Mom and Dad to be slaves.

My sister, too.

Every morning as I put on my money bag,

I detest being so mercenary.

I don't think Taro will object.

Should he want to, he's free to return.

Can't believe it.

Just a boy.

Silly little brat.

Hajime, please entrust him to us.

- Please. - Please.

Don't be stupid!

Piss off! Get out of here!

Who the hell...?!

Get out!

Please leave.

Would you please leave?

Go ahead.

Are we really happy?

I guess we are.

These soggy soba noodles are probably making Taro dreary.

He'll freeze to death.

He's getting heavy.

Dad, what's going on?

It's alright, don't cry.

Sit down.

Taro.

Fukushima's very cold.

They speak dialect, too.

Radio waves can't go that far.

No more TV.

And their name, Amamiya, is hard to write.

You won't be able to write it.

Kimura's nice and simple.

What are you on about?

Tell me?

Didn't Uncle... in his letters?

Forget it.

Back to bed. Go to sleep.

He'll find out sooner or later.

Better to deal with it now.

Taro.

Wake up.

I read your letters to Uncle.

He wants to adopt you.

He wants you as his boy.

What a fool. No wonder I hate Fukushima.

You too, eh Taro?

You're my boy.

Taro!

It's 7 o'clock!

7 o'clock?

What happened?

Why aren't they up?

Why no clattering around?

Why?

Why quit?

What about the morning calls?

The newspapers?

And breakfast deliveries?!

I fixed it all last night.

We did, it's alright.

Morning.

We've all given up chasing money.

Haven't really.

Just changed focus.

Starting today...

I'm collecting seals.

It's to send a vaulting horse to every school in Japan.

Isn't that great?

Have some salad. There you go.

Excuse me.

Collecting is collecting, no matter what it is.

But if it's wrong to collect money, and alright for seals,

I don't get it.

But you can find good bell-mark seals,

if that's how you want it...

Not that I understand...

Father.

What'll happen to me?

So thoughtless! So sneaky!

Hey, Terumi.

Relax, dear.

Taro, you eat up.

Thank you.

But you should take the money.

I said no!

Please take it. Take it.

Shut the door, it's freezing!

You won't regret it?

What's so bizarre about me buying ramen for lunch?

It's normal.

Any idiot can do it, right?

Chief, would you start?

Go ahead.

Kimura, sorry.

I forgot.

I'm after bell-mark seals.

Bell-mark seals?

Wanna play cards, Mom?

Hang on, I almost have my 100.

Dad, show me that iku-weto-nito magic trick.

Hey, Dad!

Yeah, sure.

Two, four...

Darling...

Darling.

I'm so fortunate...

Today again?

Have you heard?

Heard what?

There's a new coffee shop open.

When?

Today. And no newspaper subscription yet.

Really? Thank you.

You won't reconsider?

Hello, ladies.

She's cheating on him.

Exactly.

What do you expect?

He discards us, she dumps him.

He's a joke.

What? Excuse me.

What was that?

What are you talking about?

More...

Better than Takakura?

I saw you.

In the dance studio.

Into jealousy now, are you?

You're lifeless when you're not chasing pennies.

"Small Change Hajime."

- I was dancing with him. - I saw that.

After closing the business, I have no appetite.

I'm never horny.

I'm constipated, too.

You renounced money for love!

Darling...

And you cast out Small Change Hajime.

So I never thought of taking you to dance class...

Are you going to say that "you can't buy love"?!

It's so cliche.

Makes me laugh.

You're awake?

I was thinking.

Cold, eh?

Can I sleep with you?

Sorry.

Have you made up your mind?

I saw you today.

In front of a coffee shop.

Working again?

Taking a stroll.

You were going up and down on your bike.

So?

I was just wandering around.

You're really quitting?

No more newspapers or catering?

No.

I promise.

Never again.

Good morning, 5 o'clock call?

Fondle my breasts?

I couldn't...

Dad!

That's not us.

Nothing to do with Mom.

Takakura?

It's coming from Takakura's!

Noriko!

Who is it?

Noriko.

Noriko, wake up. Hear that?

What's happening?

They took over.

Took over?

Can't you hear?

They've taken over the business.

Morning calls, newspapers, catering, too.

You knew about it?

Why didn't you say anything?

That's our business!

Our business?

I thought we quit.

Didn't we, Small Change Hajime?!

It's all over.

A clean slate.

No way.

No way!

I thought so.

You can't.

It's in your blood. I said so.

You'll always be Small Change.

And I love you.

Liar.

What about you and Takakura?!

It's nothing!

Anyone would have.

I wanted to dance. Glide around the dance floor.

Liar. Ridiculous.

I counted every thrust.

Counted what?

Here.

Look.

Do you know my grand total?

More than 30,000 thrusts.

30,000?

You paid me more than 3 million yen?

That's taxable income.

But I have no regrets.

Not once.

Taxable income?

I don't care if you don't believe me.

But you're my only love.

Noriko...

Taxable income.

Yes, darling...

Schoolgirls?

Naughty boy.

Oozing out? Oh yes, yes...

Small Change, are you giving it all up?

I'm going to Fukushima!

To let Uncle adopt me.

I'll become Taro Amamiya!

Taro, your dad...

- Darling.. - There's no place here for me!

Taro.

I am...

Small Change Hajime.

Forget the seals.

Don't even pay interest.

Stupid damn vaulting horses!

Remember what you asked me?

Your real father...

is Oliver Hardy.

Einstein, if you want.

You're plain Taro Kimura.

And Noriko Kimura loves Taro Kimura.

We can go to Hawaii for vacation.

And buy video games. Lots of them!

Yes, we're starting up again.

They have a huge pressure cooker.

We've just begun to fight. We can't lose!

Morning.

How's Taro?

Okay, I think.

We need supplies!

Terumi, you go.

- Terumi! - Terumi!

You must be kidding.

Taro this, Taro that!

What about me?

Serves you right. I'm glad.

It's all over now!

A moneymaker.

Go to the store and buy 35 slices of salmon at 200 yen.

It can't lose. A sure-fire hit!

What is?

You know, like when you run out of soy sauce for breakfast,

or condoms at night.

We buy things for people and charge 100 yen.

Can't miss!

How about audio newspapers?

For the old and visually impaired.

We read them onto cassette tapes,

copy the tapes and sell them.

Make it 400 yen each.

500 yen.

Why not?

We could make a fortune.

Yes.

I was thinking...

Male telephone sex.

If men love Mom squealing,

wouldn't women go for Dad grunting?

Do I have it wrong?

Maybe... there's a lot of widows around.

You could be right. At 8,000 a month.

The break recharged our batteries!

10% to the originator. At 800 yen per sign up.

20.

15.

20.

18. Final offer.

That's the dad I love!

I'll make the calls. Noriko, you cook.

- Terumi, salmon. - Let's go!

Morning.

Kimura here.

What got into you?!

I am Japanese!

Sneaky bastard!

You're the sly bastard! You said you quit!

Once you're enslaved by money, it's the end!

Wait! Takakura!

You asshole!

It's morning. Call time.

Dirty one?

Yeah, a panter.

I'll have a try!

Come back!

You're crazy!

He says he has a Lolita complex.

That's lucky. Who?

Mr. Yamada.

Oh, Yamada. He's safe.

Hello?

11 years old.

They call me Teru at school.

Well, then...

Stretch your mouth with your finger.

Like this?

Right.

And then say,

"school books."

School poop.

Perfect.

Say it again, louder.

School poop.

Good morning!

I put my heart and soul into it!

I beg you!

You can't deliver. I have all the seniors.

How will you deliver?

Morning, Mr. Umekichi.

Good morning.

Good morning everyone.

It's been too long.

Good morning, Granny.

Morning everyone.

Good morning everyone.

Thanks for coming in this cold.

To warm your hearts and bodies,

I've prepared some steaming dango.

Don't fall for cakes!

Sneaky bastard!

It's bad for your health!

I'll go to 10%! 20!

Take your time.

Everyone got it?!

30%! How's that?

You're wasting your time.

Give me those papers!

That's Mitsu...

Mitsu!

Is she back?

Don't know. But I really fell for her.

I thought so! I suspected as much!

Aren't you in the harmonica club?

You can beat that.

Can't you play any better?

Mitsu's far better!

- Exactly. - Exactly.

True beauty shows through.

I miss Mitsu.

Let's be for Mitsu!

What about your quota?!

And the deliveries?!

Granny!

Taro!

Darling!

Noriko!

Terumi.

What are you thinking?

You made me do this.

She made me do it!

We danced every day.

You talked me into it.

You and your seductive wiles.

Dear, you were barely alive.

Sorry, we win.

Don't be hasty. You forgot the salty plums.

What a disaster...

Hurry up!

They're waiting!

Hurry up!

Cheer up, Terumi.

Is Taro really gone?

Do you remember that magic trick?

The iku-weto-nito one?

In Dutch that means, "I don't know."

He asked whose mansion it was

and whose funeral it was.

And they only said, "I don't know."

Not knowing Dutch saved his life.

That's the end of the story.

There's no more.

Dad.

I don't want to see them.

I'll bring Mom and Terumi for visits.

It's cold in Fukushima.

See you.

Miser!

Hypocrite!

Cheapskate!

Quitter! Idiot!

Money-grubber!

Imbecile.

Noodle head!

Clandestine Christian.

Brute!

Monkey!

Horse-face!

Octopus!

Pervert! Dirty phone-caller!

Amamiya.

Small Change Hajime!

Taro Amamiya!

Small Change Hajime!

Dummy!

Dad!

Dad!

Let's go home.

Taro.

How much did you throw away?

I counted but lost tally.

Come on!

Off to a bad start...

I'll leave you here!