All language subtitles for Superstore.S04E22.WEBRip.x264-ION10

.

- Does anybody know
what today is?

- [gasps]
Your birthday?

all: Oh.

- Happy birthday, Amy.

all: ♪ Happy birthday to you
- No.

- Happy birthday, Amy!
- May you live for another 45.

- I am not 45,
and it's not my birthday.

It's Employee Appreciation Day!

- Whoo!
Everybody get psyched!

- What is
Employee Appreciation Day?

- It's symbolic.

- I think it's a holiday
in Canada.

- Nope, it's our way
of saying thank you

for all the amazing work
you do every day.

- This store could not function
without you guys.

I mean, not you specifically,
obviously,

but labor of some sort.

- Aww.

- It's weird how
Employee Appreciation Day

always seems to fall
right around when people are

filling out their union cards.

- Mm.

Anyway, we're gonna have
little special surprises

all day long.

We've got ice cream...
all: Ooh.

- We've got a masseuse...
all: Ooh.

- And we've got Cloud 9
Frisbees for the kids.

- And for those of you
who wanna join the union,

we've got collective
bargaining rights,

higher wages,
and job security.

- Sorry, for the massages,
should we be in, like, a towel

or just totally buck naked?

- Neither, fully clothed.

- Clothed for the ice cream
too?

- Yes, everybody keep
their clothes on.

It's ridiculous how often
I have to say that.

- Speaking of clothes,
who wants a free T-shirt?

- Ooh.

[all yelping]

[glass shatters]

- You missed me.

[upbeat music]

♪

[laid-back music]

- Attention shoppers, today is
Employee Appreciation Day,

and all of our associates
are getting free ice cream.

So if you're wondering why
everything's sticky,

that's one of the reasons.

- Have you tried
the Cloud 9 Corporate sundae?

What it is, is they give you

a very, very tiny bit
of ice cream

with nothing on top and then
you just have to take it.

- No, actually, I tried
the Union Surprise.

It's every flavor you could
ever want

and every topping you could
ever dream of,

but then they shut down
the store and fire you,

and you get nothing.

- It's probably not
a popular flavor.

I can't believe you're siding
with corporate.

- Jonah, what do you want
me to do?

- I want you to say [bleep]
corporate and be on our side.

- They will shut down
the store.

You know that.

- So we'll get
other stores involved.

They can't shut us all down.

- Oh, okay, so now
you're leading

a nationwide movement?

- If not now, when?

- Literally any other time.

Just not right when I finally
have a job that pays well

and has a future.

- Okay, so this is about
you saving your job?

- Yeah, and everybody else's.

I mean, you might have nothing
to lose,

but a lot of us can't just
say "[bleep] corporate,"

and risk everything,
because Jonah needs

a cause to fight for.

- You guys fighting?

- No.
- We're fine.

- Guys, don't fight.

- Yeah, that definitely
looks infected.

- I have to sleep face down
with a wet towel on my back.

This massage is gonna
be torture.

- Maybe you shouldn't get
a massage.

- It's a free massage.

- I can't wait
for union health care.

Did you know if you tell them
you have "migraines,"

they cover Botox?

- My cousin went to Mexico,

and they injected cement
into her face.

Still in there.

You can hear it rattle
when she talks.

- So, you guys are all
thinking about joining, huh?

It's just that, like,
I don't a union giving out

free ice cream and Frisbees,
you know.

- Yeah, but they give out
other stuff.

- The teachers
at my high school unionized,

and now there's literally
nothing they can do

to get them fired.

Like, Mr. Lackman's
still there,

and he's married to
a sophomore.

- I dated a Teamster,
and he gets, like,

seven paid lunches a day.

- Seems pretty cool to me.

- If your skin was rotting,
you would smell it, right?

- ♪ You can't hurry love

♪ No, you'll just have
to wait ♪

♪ She said,
"Love don't come easy...♪

- Hey, the whole store is
signing union cards.

- What?
- Yeah.

The cleaning crew thought
they were

signing birthday cards,
but the signatures still count.

Then once Marcus went union,

all the warehouse guys
followed him.

They actually consider him
to be a leader,

which I think is the most
disturbing part of all of this.

- Well, we gotta do something.
What do we do?

- I don't know.
Show an anti-union video.

- No, those videos are so dumb.

- Yeah.
Okay, what else could we do?

- Cloud 9,
a great place to shop

and a great place to work.

Everybody wants to be here,
including unions.

- [scoffs]

So, when you were--
- Shh.

People are trying to watch.

- But before you decide,
there are...

.

- Studies show that employees

at a non-union facility are

more engaged and happier.

- Yeah! Don't try to come
between me and Cloud 9.

That's my bae.
- Well said.

- Not sure who I feel about
this new MC Cool Cloud.

- Yeah, there's something
profoundly disturbing about

seeing a two-dimensional
cartoon character

in three dimensions.

- Like with
"The Peanuts Movie."

I had no idea that
Charlie Brown was

a bald child with
a deformed head.

- It's like a bruised apple.
- I know.

- No union better mess
with my family.

- Oh, MC Cool Cloud,
you're gonna be the best dad.

- Whoa!
- What?!

[murmuring]

- I'm sorry, did MC Cool Cloud
just impregnate a human?

- I think he did.

- Okay, does anybody have
any thoughts about the video?

- I mean,
I'm a little disappointed.

I thought you were
showing us "Paddington."

- Uh, no, I never said--

- I also heard it was gonna
be "Paddington."

- I don't know where these

"Paddington" rumors
got started.

- I thought it was
a one-sided, fear-mongering

piece of corporate propaganda.

- Well, nobody asked
your opinion, so...

- Oh, I thought you did
when you said,

"Does anybody have
any thoughts on this video?"

- Well, I found it interesting
to learn that

unions actually limit
communication.

- Good point, Dina.

It's like when you have
a problem,

do you wanna be able
to come straight to me

or do you wanna have
to go through some shop steward

like in the video?

- Definitely you.
That guy was a dick.

- Where do I know him from?

- Oh, he's in that rheumatoid
arthritis commercial

where he can't pick up
his grandkids and he's sad.

- Oh, yeah, and then the dog
drops the ball at his feet,

and he just shakes his head
like, "Can't do it, buddy."

- Aww.

- So, if you can just help us
with our problems,

my hours keep getting cut,

and I don't make
a livable wage.

- Well, I do help you
with that,

because I pay the rent.

all: Oh!
- Oh, snap.

- This is definitely better
than "Paddington."

- ♪ I want you to love me

♪ When I feel down
[goat bleats]

♪ I want you to...

- All I'm saying is that
unions aren't always right,

and corporate isn't
always wrong.

- That's not what you said
when they made you come back

to work two days after
having a baby.

- Yeah, you were
livin' la vida pissed.

- I bet you get maternity leave
now, though.

- Oh, yeah, there's a really
great plan for managers.

- This isn't about me.

I'm never getting pregnant
again, so--

- Sure, but other people might
be--wait, never?

- I don't know.
- I mean, I don't know

where this is going, but--
- I just--I haven't

thought about it.
- Yeah, I haven't thought

about it either,
but it's a conversation

we should have at some point.

- At some point, Jonah,
not this point.

- Livin' la vida awkward.

- So you thought,
"That first one killed.

I'm gonna go back
to that well."

- I don't understand
the obsession with procreation.

The whole planet's got,
like, maybe ten years left.

Just enjoy it.

- Well, I care about
maternity leave.

I'm not pregnant,
but I am in a relationship

that's going very well,
and we don't use protection.

- Cut the crap, Sandra.

I know you're sleeping
with Jerry.

- What?
- Whoa.

- What?
- I--I--

- You broke the coin flip?

- Why do we even have laws?

- I guess Amy's not the only
hypocrite in the room.

- Me?
Why am I a hypocrite?

- Because you're siding
with the enemy.

- Corporate is not the enemy.

- Okay, and where are we
with the union stuff at 1217?

- Well, assuming they petition
the NLRB,

we'll get legal into it.

- Good, keep me in the loop
on that.

- Keep me in the loop on that
too.

- Okay, Jeff.

And then it's all about
slowing down their momentum.

We're running background
checks on all

the floor workers;
we've authorized ICE to do

a worksite enforcement.

We're trying to isolate
the agitators.

- ICE?
You're bringing in ICE?

Wow, that's, uh,
that's extreme.

- Yeah, Jeff,
that's why we're doing it.

It's extreme.

We're also starting a group

called Working Families
of Cloud 9 that I think--

- I have to go to the bathroom.

[clears throat]

- You can just go.
You don't have to announce it.

- Okay, it's diarrhea,

so I'm probably gonna
be gone for a while.

- He makes me uncomfortable.

- ♪ One, two, princes
kneel before you ♪

♪ That's what I said now

♪ Princes, Princes
who adore you ♪

♪ Just go ahead now

♪ One has diamonds...

- I don't understand how
Jerry is the man in the middle.

Am I picturing the right guy?

- He's not trying to be sexy,
and that's what makes him sexy.

[phone buzzes]

- [scoffs]
Jeff again.

It's, like, the fifth time
in a row.

- I honestly feel like calling
someone is

one of the worst things
you can do to them.

- I know, right?

[phone ringing]

- [sighs]

Hey, Jeff.
- Hey--oh, Amy.

Thank God.

- You know, you don't always
have to use video

when you call.

- I like video.
Is Mateo working today?

- Yep.

- Listen, you have to get him

out of the store right now.

- Mateo!
Mateo!

ICE is coming!
- Isn't it "winter is coming"?

- Did you guys see the finale?

- Nobody spoil it.
I've never watched the show.

- No, I mean ICE, Immigration.
They're coming right now.

- Oh, my God!
- You have to leave.

- Oh, my God.
- Wait, what?

You knew?
Why didn't you tell me?

- It's not my secret.
It's Mateo's secret.

- You told Jonah?
I thought that was between us.

- You told Marcus too?

- Wait, did you tell him
before you told me?

- You shouldn't tell
so many people.

- Is there anybody else
you didn't tell or just me?

- Hey, guys.

[intimidating music]

- Oh, my God.
Oh, my God.

I gotta go.

♪

- Ooh, do you want
your ice cream, Mateo?

.

- Attention Cloud 9 employees:

were you born
in a foreign country?

Have you overstayed a visa

or did you cross
the border illegally?

Well, today is not
your lucky day,

because ICE is here.

So stay tuned,
because you can't leave.

I like to add a little color
in the announcements.

Fun for everybody.

- There are two guards
on the loading dock.

- Yeah, same with
the side door.

- Oh, God, we're trapped.

- Guys, what about this?

You hide in here
with a bunch of mannequins.

Then if ICE looks in,
all they see is

a bunch of arms and legs.

- That's your brilliant plan,
me hiding in a trash compactor?

What if somebody pushes
the button?

- Oh, I could tape up a sign
that says,

"Please don't operate
trash compactor."

- No.
No, they'd notice that.

It's the fact that
only an idiot would hide

inside a working
trash compactor

that plays in our favor.

- Maybe we could hide you
up on the roof.

- And then what?

- Well, and then,
you know...phase two.

[alarm blaring]
- Whoa.

- Sorry, my fingers are
still greasy

from a salami rollup.

Don't worry.
I'll reset this, you'll get in.

It's gonna be fine.

- Here I have my refugee
identity certificate,

my social security card,
driver's license,

electric bills proving
my residence.

- That's fine.
That's fine.

- And here are pictures of me
at the block party

in my mostly white
neighborhood.

As you can see,
everybody's smiling.

The community is embracing me.

- So, uh, what's the process
here?

- Everyone should just go about
business as usual

while we run the socials
through the database.

If we spot any illegals,
we'll let you know.

- Well, I don't think we have
any illegals working here.

- Well, you never can tell.
They look just like you and me.

Well, you.

- Ha-ha.

- What happened?

- They're going through payroll
now.

I don't know how long it's
gonna take,

but we have to get Mateo out
now.

- Not sure how happy
corporate's gonna be about

you doing that.

- Well, [bleep] corporate.
I'm done.

- Welcome back.

- ♪ Keep me down

♪ I get knocked down,
but I get up again ♪

♪ You're never gonna
keep me down ♪

♪ I get knocked...

- Obviously, we're not gonna
just let them take Mateo,

so somebody come up
with something.

There are no bad ideas.

- What about if we get--
- Okay, Sandra.

Could you just stop it
with the wigs, please?

Thank you.
- Okay, guys--guys.

I actually think I have
something here.

"In the event
of an ICE enforcement action,

"anyone who may be in violation
of U.S. immigration law

"should immediately
present themselves

to an officer for evaluation."

This is from ICE.gov.

- Super helpful.

- Screw it.
You can live with me.

I've been living in a small
utility room

in the back of the store
for several months.

all: What?

- I bathe at night
in the employee bathroom,

and I pee in jars.

- Ew.

- Why wouldn't you just pee in
the bathroom?

- 'Cause I've been peeing
in jars.

- I would love to not spend
the rest of my life

living with you in a hole
in the back of the store,

but thank you.

- You're welcome.

- Okay, hiding Mateo
in the store won't work anyway.

They have sniffer dogs,
infrared scanners.

They bust through windows,
kick down doors,

come down through
the ceiling...

I mean, it's weird.

Their entire job is just
an exercise

in walls being useless.

- Okay, so what
are you suggesting, Dina?

That we just hand Mateo over
to ICE?

- I mean, no offense to Mateo,

but technically,
he did commit a crime.

[indistinct chatter]

I'm just saying,
if you get caught

sneaking into a movie,
they don't let you stay

for the rest of the movie.

- It depends how much
of the movie you've watched.

- Yeah, and what the movie is.

- It's the greatest movie
you'll ever see.

It's called America.

- Oh, "Ride Along 2" is
in my top ten, easy.

- What if your parents
brought you to the movie

through no fault of your own?

- Well, you'd still get
kicked out.

- I mean, yeah.
Okay.

- What if you were born
in the movie theater?

- All right, why don't we take
a break from this metaphor?

- Yes, please.

- Guys, let's not forget that

Jesus was an immigrant
from heaven.

- Oh, boy.
- Yeah.

And he had to go home too,
and it was not a fun trip.

Plus, it could not have been
easy being a white guy

in the Middle East.

- What if we let you get
deported and then you can just

come back legally like Sayid?

- Yeah, what was that
application process like?

- Well, my country was
in a civil war.

I applied for refugee status
and waited two years

for background checks
while all my friends

either died
or fled persecution.

- Sorry, I meant literally
what was the application like?

Did you do it online or was it
a snail mail situation?

- Snail mail.
- Oof, brutal.

- I know.

We can paint your vest
the same color as your sweater,

so it'd make you look like
you're a customer.

- Oh, we could just take off
his vest.

- That's basically what
I just pitched.

- Guys, that wouldn't work.

They're checking all
the customers' IDs

before they leave.

I mean, if the store
was more crowded,

we could try and slip him out,

but there are, like,
six customers here today.

- Wait, what if we made it
more crowded?

Just, like,
pack the store with people

and then slipped him out.

- You know what, if we hit up
everyone we know,

we could fill up the store
pretty quick.

- Some of those people could
wear wigs if they wanted to.

- Sandra!
- Shut up.

- Okay, well, this is
the best plan we've got.

So everybody call everyone
they've ever known.

Friends, family, whoever,
just get them here ASAP.

- Actually, most of my friends
live in Manhattan,

so I don't think
they'll make it on time.

- Yeah, okay.
That's fine.

- They're in fashion.
Mostly, they work in fashion.

- Guys, "ICE" on three.
One, two--

- Why would we cheer for ICE?

- I don't know, guys.

I'm sick of always
having to be the fun one.

Let's just--let's do this.

.

- Wow, when everyone
calls their friends,

this place really fills up.

- Yeah, I called Jerusha,
but she's busy.

She's doing a fundraiser
to buy Pastor Craig

a second airplane.

- Ugh, I wish all my friends
didn't live in Manhattan.

- Thank you for coming.
- Of course.

I'm always gonna
be here for you.

- You're the best.
- You're the best.

- No, you're the best.

- I hate to say this because
they're close friends of mine,

but they're both
human traffickers.

If you check her locker,
there's evidence.

- Okay, we have to spread out
the chaos.

Heather, if you could grab
all of your basketball friends

and go block the guy
in pharmacy.

And, um--oh, Marcus.
Take all your friends--

- My bro squad.

- Yeah, whatever,
and go swarm bedding.

Bro out.

And--oh, Kelly.
You--Kelly!

What are you doing here?

- Oh, Jonah called me.
- Oh.

- We said to call everyone.

- I brought a bunch of people
from the Fenton store.

- Oh, great.
Awesome.

Good.

Uh, I just--I guess
I didn't realize

you two were still in touch.

- I mean, you know,
we check in.

- We do too.
- No, we don't.

- 'Cause I don't have
your number.

- Okay, great.
Cool, very cool.

Glad to have you on the team.

If you could just grab
all your...

so were these, like, texts
or phone calls?

Doesn't matter.
Doesn't matter.

- Whoa.
[clicks tongue]

Nice piece, dog.

What is it,
like a Cougar Magnum?

- It's a Glock.
- Oh, nice.

Very nice.
Could I try shooting that?

- My gun?
No.

- Mm-mm.
Oh, watch out!

Whoa, whoa, whoa, whoa, whoa!
Whoop, whoop, whoop!

- We didn't have any
that said

"Make America Great Again."

The closest I could find was
"Fart Police."

- Ugh, I'm just gonna wear
this one.

How do I look?

- Great.

I'm gonna miss
working with you.

- Chey, relax.
I'm gonna get out.

- Yeah, but even if you do
make it out,

you can't come back
now that they know.

- Oh.
Uh...yeah, of course.

Obviously...that would
be the case.

- ♪ And the oh, oh, oh's
they haunt me ♪

♪ Like ghosts they want me
to make... ♪

- And then at one pageant,

we heard this girl gagging
in the bathroom.

And we're all like,
"Guess we know how

she stays so slim."

Turns out, an actual strangler
had broken into the building

and was straight up
trying to murder her.

Well, she managed to fight
him off

with a hot curling iron
and an eyebrow pencil.

[laughs]

She came in second.

- So, the guy
we're looking for is named

Mateo Fernando Aquino Liwanag.

- Liwanag?
- Yeah, it sounds Swedish.

- Or Latvian.

- Mateo could be Mexican.
- Hey, you know what?

There is a guy here named Mark.
Maybe you're looking for him.

- No, it's not Mark.

It's Mateo, and it says that
he has worked here

for four years.

- Well, I'm sorry.
I know everyone who has

ever worked here, and I have
never heard that name.

- [sighs]
Okay.

Thanks.

So, who's this?

- What the hell?

- Um, that--I...have never seen

that picture before.

- Feels like
I'm in a horror movie.

- Okay, just act natural.

- I'm trying to,
but I forgot how to walk.

- Oh, and now I forget.

I think we're doing it right.
- Okay.

You're doing it.
- There you are!

They know about you.

both: What?

- They saw your picture.
They know what you look like.

We have to go now.
- Okay, well, where do we go?

- I don't know.
- Oh, my God. Oh, my God.

Oh, my God.

- Okay, listen to me very
carefully.

I'll get you out of there.
- Uh...repeat.

- You've got agents
coming your way

from menswear and electronics.

Make a left at aisle nine,

and we'll lose them in grocery.

- Thank you, Dina.
- Go, now!

- You ever find yourself
in a situation

where you're dating a girl
and you realize she's, like,

an immigrant or whatever,
and you gotta choose between

your love and your country?

- Hasn't come up.
- Ah.

You'd choose love, though.
Yeah, I can tell.

I know your type.

- Okay, keep walking.
- Come on.

- All right, when you hit
the end of the aisle,

you're gonna need to head
due west.

- Where?
- Left or right, Dina?

- Left!

Due west runs diagonally
through the store

from camping
to customer service.

How do you not know that?

- Left.
- Okay.

[exciting percussive music]

- Oh.
- Hey!

- Oh!
- Oh, [bleep], there's someone.

Run!
- Come on, come on, come on,

come on, come on!
- Run!

- They're heading north
through housewares.

- Get out of there!
Go! Go now!

- So, everyone knows now?

- Everyone knows.

- Do you wanna get married?

- Okay.

[both laugh]

- Okay, you guys need to keep
going straight

through Bath & Beauty.

and we're gonna try and make it
all the way

to the end of
the garden section, all right?

Go, go, go!

♪

- Go, go, go!

- Did you know that the capital
of Panama is Panama?

I can rap the entire
Central American countries.

I did it once
for a talent competition.

♪ México D.F., México

♪ Guatemala, Guatemala

♪ Tegucigalpa, Honduras

♪ San Salvador, El Salvador

♪ San José, Costa Rica

♪ Panamá, Panamá

- Go!
- This way. Go, go, go!

Wait, wait, wait.
- No, wait, stop!

Stop!
Reverse course, turn around!

Okay, new plan.

Just make it to pharmacy.
You can hide out--

No, no, wait.
Turn around.

Turn around, go back.
Go back the other way.

You could lose them
in housewares, I think.

Just book it!

Okay?
Book it to the end!

- This one.
Go down here, down here.

- Stop, stop, stop!
No, wait, stop!

There's, like, 20 guys
coming that way.

- What?

- No, stop!
Stop, stop!

Now there's another one!
There's--hold on!

Hold on.
- Dina, just tell us

where to go.

- Okay, hang on.
Just wait.

Wait!
I don't... I don't know.

They're... they're everywhere.

- What?

- I'm sorry.

- No!
- It's okay.

- Okay, there's a vent
up there.

We can climb up
on the thing and--

- Or we can create a diversion
and take off our tops

while you go run.

- Yes, let's do that.
- Guys.

Stop, stop, guys!

[sighs]

It's okay.

It's over.

["Homegrown" by Haux]

- ♪ Into the dark

♪ I found it by the lake

♪

♪ We were so close

♪ I couldn't
bare to weight ♪

♪

♪ You were a shadow

♪ And I left you
in the shade ♪

♪

♪ I was still running

- What do we do now?

- I mean,
we have to fight this.

- How?

- No idea.

♪

- ♪ Cut to the fallout

♪ That silenced all
our words ♪

♪

♪ I was still fighting

- Wanna start a union?

♪