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1
00:00:03,937 --> 00:00:05,473
* *
2
00:00:05,539 --> 00:00:06,540
(phone chimes)
3
00:00:06,640 --> 00:00:07,541
(gasps)
4
00:00:07,641 --> 00:00:08,842
Ooh, look.
5
00:00:08,976 --> 00:00:10,911
The yearbook faculty pictures
just came in.
6
00:00:11,011 --> 00:00:12,213
Oh, don't show me.
7
00:00:12,313 --> 00:00:14,148
-I never like those.
-Okay.
8
00:00:14,215 --> 00:00:15,883
Okay, let me see.
Come on, come on, come on.
9
00:00:16,617 --> 00:00:19,187
Oh, God!
I told you not to show me.
10
00:00:19,287 --> 00:00:20,854
What are you talking about?
11
00:00:20,954 --> 00:00:22,223
You look cute.
12
00:00:22,356 --> 00:00:23,657
That's cute?
13
00:00:23,757 --> 00:00:25,559
That's what I look like?
So that's what you saying?
14
00:00:25,693 --> 00:00:27,261
You want to see awful?
15
00:00:27,361 --> 00:00:29,130
Huh. Look at mine.
16
00:00:29,197 --> 00:00:31,299
Aw. You look great.
17
00:00:31,365 --> 00:00:32,533
Great?
18
00:00:32,633 --> 00:00:35,669
I look like
Dog the Bounty Hunter.
19
00:00:35,769 --> 00:00:37,871
Well, I look like Shrek.
20
00:00:38,005 --> 00:00:39,740
Shrek the ogre?
21
00:00:39,840 --> 00:00:41,809
No, Shrek
the beautiful Black woman.
22
00:00:41,909 --> 00:00:43,711
Yes, the ogre!
23
00:00:46,046 --> 00:00:49,250
Calvin, would you sleep
with this hag?
24
00:00:50,050 --> 00:00:51,419
I don't see a hag.
25
00:00:51,552 --> 00:00:54,522
I would sleep with
that beautiful woman though.
26
00:00:54,622 --> 00:00:56,657
(chuckling)
27
00:00:56,757 --> 00:00:58,192
Nice.
28
00:00:58,259 --> 00:00:59,693
I should teach a class.
29
00:00:59,793 --> 00:01:00,961
(door opens)
30
00:01:01,061 --> 00:01:02,330
Ooh, good morning!
31
00:01:02,396 --> 00:01:04,432
Calvin, I brought you your mail.
32
00:01:04,565 --> 00:01:06,534
Yeah. Thank you. It's garbage.
33
00:01:06,600 --> 00:01:08,068
(protesting)
34
00:01:08,169 --> 00:01:09,303
-(grunts)
-Well,
35
00:01:09,403 --> 00:01:11,172
don't you want to see
what you got?
36
00:01:11,239 --> 00:01:14,041
Dave, I know what I got.
It's coupons, all right?
37
00:01:14,108 --> 00:01:15,543
Uh, I change my own oil,
38
00:01:15,609 --> 00:01:17,745
I don't need five dollars off
of a cheeseburger,
39
00:01:17,878 --> 00:01:22,015
and I... I don't want
a free consultation for Botox.
40
00:01:23,251 --> 00:01:25,286
It is a $30 value.
41
00:01:26,120 --> 00:01:27,521
But, Calvin, look at this.
42
00:01:27,621 --> 00:01:29,056
You got a letter from the city.
43
00:01:29,123 --> 00:01:32,293
(scoffs) Well, when was a letter
from the city ever good?
44
00:01:32,393 --> 00:01:33,627
Sometimes it's good.
45
00:01:33,727 --> 00:01:34,795
You know, I'm gonna read it.
46
00:01:34,895 --> 00:01:36,464
Here we go.
47
00:01:36,564 --> 00:01:38,532
"Congratulations, Mr. Butler."
48
00:01:38,632 --> 00:01:39,700
Ha.
49
00:01:39,767 --> 00:01:42,402
"You have been chosen
by your peers
50
00:01:42,503 --> 00:01:43,804
to be honored--"
51
00:01:43,904 --> 00:01:45,104
(stammering)
52
00:01:45,872 --> 00:01:47,875
You don't read
another man's mail.
53
00:01:49,109 --> 00:01:52,146
"...to be honored with a rose
54
00:01:52,280 --> 00:01:54,782
on the Pasadena Walk of Roses."
55
00:01:54,882 --> 00:01:56,517
Well, all right!
56
00:01:56,616 --> 00:01:58,386
Oh. Well, what's so great, baby?
57
00:01:58,452 --> 00:02:01,121
You know those plaques they put
in the sidewalks in downtown?
58
00:02:01,222 --> 00:02:03,824
Oh, with the names
of great Pasadenians?
59
00:02:03,957 --> 00:02:05,226
Pasadonas?
60
00:02:05,326 --> 00:02:06,827
-What are we?
-Uh,
61
00:02:06,960 --> 00:02:09,330
I believe the term
is, uh, "Pasadini."
62
00:02:09,463 --> 00:02:11,232
And they're giving one
63
00:02:11,332 --> 00:02:12,633
-to Calvin.
-Nice.
-Guys,
64
00:02:12,766 --> 00:02:14,735
it-it's not a big deal.
It's not a big deal.
65
00:02:14,802 --> 00:02:18,239
It's just a way for the city
to show their appreciation
66
00:02:18,339 --> 00:02:21,509
for my numerous
outstanding contributions
67
00:02:21,609 --> 00:02:23,411
and accomplishments.
68
00:02:23,477 --> 00:02:24,945
Okay.
69
00:02:25,012 --> 00:02:26,514
Ooh, look at this, Calvin.
You also got
70
00:02:26,614 --> 00:02:27,848
this big thick one.
Look at that.
71
00:02:27,981 --> 00:02:30,318
Ooh. You've been summoned
for jury duty.
72
00:02:30,451 --> 00:02:31,752
Mm.
73
00:02:31,852 --> 00:02:33,421
I believe I've done enough
for the city.
74
00:02:33,487 --> 00:02:35,055
You keep that one.
75
00:02:36,824 --> 00:02:38,559
That's so nice for Calvin,
76
00:02:38,659 --> 00:02:40,494
getting his name
on the Walk of Roses.
77
00:02:40,594 --> 00:02:42,363
Uh, yeah, was it, uh,
78
00:02:42,463 --> 00:02:45,031
divine intervention or was it...
79
00:02:45,165 --> 00:02:47,335
Dave-ine intervention?
80
00:02:51,339 --> 00:02:52,773
No reaction to what I just said?
81
00:02:52,873 --> 00:02:54,908
I'm sorry.
I was looking at my picture.
82
00:02:55,008 --> 00:02:56,210
What?
83
00:02:56,310 --> 00:02:57,778
No, if I repeat it, it ruins it.
84
00:02:57,878 --> 00:02:59,012
Okay.
85
00:03:00,681 --> 00:03:02,683
Okay, what I was saying is
86
00:03:02,783 --> 00:03:05,519
that I'm the one who nominated
Calvin for the rose.
87
00:03:05,619 --> 00:03:06,687
-You are?
-Yeah.
88
00:03:06,787 --> 00:03:08,289
Why didn't you tell anyone?
89
00:03:08,389 --> 00:03:09,757
Well, because it would
kind of cheapen it
90
00:03:09,857 --> 00:03:11,725
if Calvin knew
that his best friend
91
00:03:11,859 --> 00:03:13,126
had been pulling the strings.
92
00:03:13,227 --> 00:03:15,095
When did you have time
to do all this?
93
00:03:15,195 --> 00:03:16,630
It wasn't that big a deal.
94
00:03:16,697 --> 00:03:18,266
All I had to do was tell them
95
00:03:18,366 --> 00:03:20,634
about Calvin's numerous
contributions to the community,
96
00:03:20,701 --> 00:03:22,035
write up a ten-page proposal,
97
00:03:22,135 --> 00:03:24,171
put together a quick PowerPoint,
and then get
98
00:03:24,272 --> 00:03:26,440
400 signatures on a petition.
99
00:03:28,208 --> 00:03:29,543
Okay, one,
100
00:03:29,677 --> 00:03:31,779
-you're a really good friend.
-Aw.
101
00:03:31,879 --> 00:03:32,913
And, two,
102
00:03:33,046 --> 00:03:34,715
you gotta get a job.
103
00:03:37,251 --> 00:03:39,287
* Welcome to the block,
welcome to the neighborhood *
104
00:03:39,387 --> 00:03:40,888
* Welcome to the hood. *
105
00:03:45,626 --> 00:03:46,994
(singsongy):
Good morning!
106
00:03:47,094 --> 00:03:48,862
How's my favorite ghostwriter?
107
00:03:48,996 --> 00:03:50,898
Oh, damn. The pink box.
108
00:03:51,665 --> 00:03:53,966
Is that any way
to greet your agent?
109
00:03:54,067 --> 00:03:56,804
You always bring donuts
when you have bad news.
110
00:03:56,904 --> 00:03:58,472
(chuckles nervously)
You're so paranoid.
111
00:03:58,539 --> 00:03:59,406
(chuckles)
112
00:03:59,540 --> 00:04:00,708
What's in the box, Lisa?
113
00:04:00,808 --> 00:04:01,742
What's in the box?
114
00:04:01,875 --> 00:04:03,677
(chuckles)
115
00:04:03,777 --> 00:04:05,045
It's donuts.
116
00:04:05,178 --> 00:04:06,046
(groans, exhales)
117
00:04:06,146 --> 00:04:07,781
But it's fine. It's good.
118
00:04:07,881 --> 00:04:11,719
Mercedes read the first five
chapters of Brown Sugar Nights.
119
00:04:11,819 --> 00:04:12,886
And?
120
00:04:12,986 --> 00:04:14,988
-And her people sent some notes.
-Ah.
121
00:04:15,055 --> 00:04:16,757
And her other people
sent a few more.
122
00:04:16,890 --> 00:04:18,257
Oh. Great.
123
00:04:18,392 --> 00:04:20,861
-Man, look...
-Oh, don't get upset.
124
00:04:20,961 --> 00:04:23,364
These are just
a few little suggestions.
125
00:04:23,464 --> 00:04:25,366
Oh, so I don't have
to do this stuff?
126
00:04:25,466 --> 00:04:27,668
Of course you have to.
Are you insane?
127
00:04:29,570 --> 00:04:32,440
But these notes are
always such confusing nonsense.
128
00:04:32,540 --> 00:04:35,308
It would be so much easier
if I could talk to Mercedes.
129
00:04:35,409 --> 00:04:37,845
(gasps)
You can't just talk to her.
130
00:04:37,945 --> 00:04:39,212
What would her people do?
131
00:04:39,313 --> 00:04:41,248
I don't know
what her people do do.
132
00:04:41,349 --> 00:04:43,951
You know what?
I want to meet her.
133
00:04:44,084 --> 00:04:45,386
(groans)
If you insist.
134
00:04:45,486 --> 00:04:46,887
But I am warning you--
135
00:04:46,987 --> 00:04:48,756
Mercedes is a monster.
136
00:04:48,889 --> 00:04:51,024
She once pushed a Kardashian
over the edge
137
00:04:51,091 --> 00:04:52,760
of an infinity pool.
138
00:04:53,694 --> 00:04:54,895
* *
139
00:04:54,995 --> 00:04:57,531
(clearing throat loudly)
140
00:04:59,299 --> 00:05:00,901
TINA:
Ooh.
141
00:05:01,001 --> 00:05:03,804
-All right.
-I mean, what do you wear
142
00:05:03,904 --> 00:05:06,273
when you're being celebrated
as a local legend?
143
00:05:06,407 --> 00:05:09,076
-(chuckles)
-I mean, I want to look formal
144
00:05:09,176 --> 00:05:10,277
but humble.
145
00:05:10,411 --> 00:05:12,112
I want to look impressive
146
00:05:12,245 --> 00:05:13,647
yet approachable.
147
00:05:13,781 --> 00:05:15,749
You know, fly but not superfly.
148
00:05:15,849 --> 00:05:17,618
You know what I mean?
149
00:05:18,652 --> 00:05:19,787
So what do y'all think?
150
00:05:19,887 --> 00:05:21,054
It's great. Yeah, it's nice.
151
00:05:21,121 --> 00:05:22,856
-I love it. I love it.
-Yeah, it's...
152
00:05:22,956 --> 00:05:24,858
-Awesome.
-It's-it's good.
153
00:05:27,661 --> 00:05:28,662
But?
154
00:05:28,796 --> 00:05:30,263
(stammers)
155
00:05:30,364 --> 00:05:32,700
It looks a little like you're
the mayor of Emerald City.
156
00:05:34,902 --> 00:05:36,103
To be honest,
157
00:05:36,169 --> 00:05:37,971
it looks a little bit
like someone...
158
00:05:38,071 --> 00:05:39,973
stole your Lucky Charms.
159
00:05:41,609 --> 00:05:45,112
Which Batman villain has
all the question marks?
160
00:05:45,178 --> 00:05:46,447
-The Riddler.
-The Riddler.
161
00:05:46,514 --> 00:05:48,682
-(protesting)
-What? That's what it is.
162
00:05:48,782 --> 00:05:49,683
That's what it is.
163
00:05:49,783 --> 00:05:51,018
You got your nerve.
164
00:05:51,151 --> 00:05:53,086
You wear above-the-knee shorts.
165
00:05:54,988 --> 00:05:57,491
He-he didn't mean it, Marty.
166
00:05:57,625 --> 00:05:58,926
Marty.
167
00:05:59,026 --> 00:06:00,027
Aw.
168
00:06:00,127 --> 00:06:01,328
All right, well, never mind him.
169
00:06:01,429 --> 00:06:02,963
Baby, where's
your rose gonna be?
170
00:06:03,063 --> 00:06:06,734
Well, it says it's on the corner
of, uh, Azalea and Orange?
171
00:06:06,834 --> 00:06:08,335
-Azalea and Orange?
-Hmm.
172
00:06:08,436 --> 00:06:10,103
-I can't picture it.
-No, I'm sure
173
00:06:10,203 --> 00:06:13,173
it's gonna be near
all the other Pasadena giants.
174
00:06:13,306 --> 00:06:16,209
You know, like Jackie Robinson,
Oppenheimer,
175
00:06:16,343 --> 00:06:18,311
or the dad from Brady Bunch.
176
00:06:18,412 --> 00:06:21,882
You know, Calvin, we should
go down there and check it out.
177
00:06:22,015 --> 00:06:22,983
Definitely.
178
00:06:23,050 --> 00:06:24,217
But, first, I got to figure out
179
00:06:24,317 --> 00:06:25,719
what I'm gonna wear
to the ceremony.
180
00:06:25,853 --> 00:06:27,621
There's gonna be a million
photographers out there.
181
00:06:27,688 --> 00:06:28,856
Yeah, you're right.
182
00:06:28,956 --> 00:06:30,123
I'm gonna go make sure
183
00:06:30,190 --> 00:06:33,093
I still fit
into my wedding khakis.
184
00:06:34,528 --> 00:06:36,997
Oh, my God, Gemma,
we're gonna be photographed.
185
00:06:37,064 --> 00:06:38,231
I can't be.
186
00:06:38,331 --> 00:06:41,534
I look like Garth
from Wayne's World.
187
00:06:41,635 --> 00:06:43,003
You're beautiful.
188
00:06:43,070 --> 00:06:45,639
I look like somebody
just rescued me from a well.
189
00:06:46,907 --> 00:06:48,141
Wait a minute.
190
00:06:48,241 --> 00:06:50,310
Those coupons
Calvin got in the mail.
191
00:06:50,409 --> 00:06:53,413
There was a free consultation
for Botox.
192
00:06:53,514 --> 00:06:54,848
-Here it is.
-Oh.
193
00:06:54,915 --> 00:06:56,450
Well, I guess
it wouldn't hurt to get
194
00:06:56,550 --> 00:06:58,652
-a free consultation, right?
-Yeah.
195
00:06:58,719 --> 00:07:01,589
-Maybe we get a little glow-up
for the photos.
-Oh.
196
00:07:01,689 --> 00:07:03,557
-And it does have a $30 value.
-Yeah.
197
00:07:03,657 --> 00:07:06,894
We'd be stupid
not to at least hear them out.
198
00:07:06,994 --> 00:07:09,563
Okay, okay.
Well, party on, Wayne.
199
00:07:10,664 --> 00:07:12,065
That's mean.
200
00:07:12,766 --> 00:07:15,268
* *
201
00:07:17,170 --> 00:07:19,439
(gasps)
Malcolm Butler!
202
00:07:19,540 --> 00:07:21,441
We meet at last!
(chuckles)
203
00:07:21,575 --> 00:07:23,110
Am I late? Are we late?
204
00:07:23,243 --> 00:07:25,479
Only, uh, 45 minutes.
205
00:07:25,579 --> 00:07:26,714
Oh, great.
206
00:07:26,814 --> 00:07:28,415
I was afraid
I was keeping you waiting.
207
00:07:29,950 --> 00:07:31,885
I'm sorry.
Let me get you another chair.
208
00:07:31,985 --> 00:07:32,920
Oh. No, no.
209
00:07:33,020 --> 00:07:33,921
She's not hungry.
210
00:07:34,021 --> 00:07:35,255
She ate yesterday.
211
00:07:35,388 --> 00:07:36,590
Um...
212
00:07:36,690 --> 00:07:38,425
Bernard?
(chuckles softly)
213
00:07:38,526 --> 00:07:40,494
Why did you sit us
in the middle of the restaurant?
214
00:07:40,594 --> 00:07:42,596
Am I the owner
or the entertainment?
215
00:07:42,696 --> 00:07:44,064
Is this SeaWorld?
Do you expect me
216
00:07:44,164 --> 00:07:46,466
to clap my hands
and catch sardines in my mouth?
217
00:07:47,534 --> 00:07:49,537
My apologies, Ms. Selznick.
I, uh...
218
00:07:49,603 --> 00:07:50,904
I don't know
what I was thinking.
219
00:07:51,004 --> 00:07:52,940
No, no. Hey, look,
that-that's my bad.
220
00:07:53,040 --> 00:07:55,175
Bernard said
I could sit anywhere, so I...
221
00:07:55,275 --> 00:07:56,308
We can just move.
222
00:07:56,443 --> 00:07:57,545
-It's fine.
-Oh.
223
00:07:57,611 --> 00:08:00,480
We can move
in the restaurant I own?
224
00:08:00,581 --> 00:08:02,449
Thank you for mansplaining.
225
00:08:03,917 --> 00:08:05,285
(clears throat)
226
00:08:05,385 --> 00:08:07,120
Okay, um, I'm-I'm-I'm sorry.
227
00:08:07,254 --> 00:08:10,123
I know you are
a very busy woman.
228
00:08:10,223 --> 00:08:11,625
I just got, uh...
229
00:08:11,759 --> 00:08:13,794
I got turned around by the notes
on Brown Sugar Nights.
230
00:08:13,894 --> 00:08:17,364
Like when you say the book
should be "aspirational..."
231
00:08:17,464 --> 00:08:19,332
I never said "aspirational."
232
00:08:19,466 --> 00:08:20,634
Well, your people did.
233
00:08:20,768 --> 00:08:22,102
What did they mean by that?
234
00:08:22,202 --> 00:08:23,136
I don't know.
235
00:08:23,236 --> 00:08:24,672
That's why I'm here.
236
00:08:25,906 --> 00:08:27,307
Here you are, Ms. Selznick.
237
00:08:27,407 --> 00:08:28,909
Your usual.
238
00:08:29,743 --> 00:08:32,011
(groans)
Why are my mussels not open?
239
00:08:32,980 --> 00:08:34,682
Am I supposed to wrestle them?
240
00:08:35,482 --> 00:08:37,317
You're absolutely right.
It's totally unacceptable.
241
00:08:37,450 --> 00:08:39,753
Uh, no, hey, Bernard, Bernard,
it-it's fine, okay?
242
00:08:39,852 --> 00:08:40,921
I will open the mussels.
243
00:08:41,020 --> 00:08:42,422
Don't talk to Bernard.
244
00:08:42,489 --> 00:08:44,191
What?
245
00:08:44,324 --> 00:08:46,927
First you pick the worst seat
in the restaurant,
246
00:08:47,027 --> 00:08:48,796
and now you're ordering
my staff around?
247
00:08:48,862 --> 00:08:50,363
-No, but-but-but--
-And here?
248
00:08:50,497 --> 00:08:52,665
In the restaurant
that my ex-husband built
249
00:08:52,800 --> 00:08:54,534
from the ground up and lost
to me because his lawyers
250
00:08:54,668 --> 00:08:55,836
were idiots?
251
00:08:55,969 --> 00:08:59,272
-But-but, listen--
-Oh, but-but-but-but-but!
252
00:08:59,339 --> 00:09:01,174
(gasping)
253
00:09:01,274 --> 00:09:03,010
We're done here.
254
00:09:03,110 --> 00:09:04,244
Purse.
255
00:09:09,717 --> 00:09:11,184
Hey, Bernard?
256
00:09:11,284 --> 00:09:13,286
Can you box all this up?
(chuckles)
257
00:09:13,353 --> 00:09:15,022
I think I just lost my job.
258
00:09:15,155 --> 00:09:17,357
*
259
00:09:18,325 --> 00:09:20,027
(siren wailing)
260
00:09:20,928 --> 00:09:24,064
This is the place
where they plan on honoring me?
261
00:09:24,898 --> 00:09:26,834
It says the corner
of Azalea and Orange.
262
00:09:26,900 --> 00:09:28,001
(sniffs)
Oh, my God.
263
00:09:28,068 --> 00:09:29,803
-What-what is that smell?
-Hmm.
264
00:09:29,903 --> 00:09:31,138
It's not azalea.
265
00:09:31,238 --> 00:09:33,206
And it's definitely not orange.
266
00:09:33,306 --> 00:09:36,644
You know, I don't want my rose
on this terrible street, man.
267
00:09:36,744 --> 00:09:38,278
Okay, well, come on. Look.
268
00:09:38,378 --> 00:09:39,546
Calvin,
269
00:09:39,680 --> 00:09:41,514
there's a St. Patrick's Day
headquarters.
270
00:09:41,615 --> 00:09:44,317
You know, they don't even have
that on Rodeo Drive.
271
00:09:44,417 --> 00:09:47,387
You know what else
they don't have on Rodeo Drive?
272
00:09:47,487 --> 00:09:49,757
A random wheel
with a boot in it.
273
00:09:52,292 --> 00:09:53,426
Okay, look, I get it.
274
00:09:53,560 --> 00:09:56,063
This street is a bit
of a fixer-upper.
275
00:09:56,163 --> 00:09:59,399
But this place has
real potential.
276
00:09:59,499 --> 00:10:00,600
It's got character.
277
00:10:00,701 --> 00:10:02,736
(scoffs)
That's not what I would call it.
278
00:10:03,837 --> 00:10:05,338
Hey. What's up?
279
00:10:05,438 --> 00:10:07,007
We got a problem here?
280
00:10:09,009 --> 00:10:10,944
You guys want to buy
a TV remote?
281
00:10:12,112 --> 00:10:13,346
Where's the TV?
282
00:10:14,414 --> 00:10:15,916
Give me 15 minutes.
283
00:10:19,653 --> 00:10:22,122
A young entrepreneur.
284
00:10:22,222 --> 00:10:23,891
Now, that guy's going places.
285
00:10:23,991 --> 00:10:25,759
He's going to steal a TV, Dave.
286
00:10:25,893 --> 00:10:27,194
Oh, yeah? Oh.
287
00:10:27,260 --> 00:10:29,629
Then why is he over there
breaking into my car?
288
00:10:29,730 --> 00:10:31,264
-Why's he breaking into--
Hey, stop that!
-Hey! Hey!
289
00:10:31,364 --> 00:10:33,533
-Uh-uh! What are you doing?!
-Stop that, sir!
290
00:10:38,171 --> 00:10:39,639
TINA:
It looks good, right? I mean...
291
00:10:39,740 --> 00:10:41,709
we didn't overdo it with
the radiance package, did we?
292
00:10:41,809 --> 00:10:44,211
GEMMA:
No. I mean, we didn't do
the ultimate package.
293
00:10:44,311 --> 00:10:46,613
-That would have been crazy.
-Right?
294
00:10:57,357 --> 00:10:58,959
I mean, looking at you,
295
00:10:59,059 --> 00:11:01,995
I wouldn't even know
you'd done anything.
296
00:11:02,095 --> 00:11:03,663
Oh. You, too.
297
00:11:03,797 --> 00:11:05,398
You're just you, but...
298
00:11:05,498 --> 00:11:07,000
smoother.
299
00:11:07,100 --> 00:11:08,836
Mm.
300
00:11:08,969 --> 00:11:11,504
I mean, you look like
you got so much sleep.
301
00:11:11,604 --> 00:11:13,073
So refreshed.
302
00:11:13,173 --> 00:11:15,375
That's how I feel.
303
00:11:17,878 --> 00:11:18,779
-Oh!
-Mm!
304
00:11:18,879 --> 00:11:21,849
There's my grandbaby!
305
00:11:21,949 --> 00:11:23,083
Mommy.
306
00:11:24,151 --> 00:11:25,618
What happened?
307
00:11:25,719 --> 00:11:26,887
What do you mean?
308
00:11:27,654 --> 00:11:29,957
Well, you're...
(stammers)
309
00:11:30,023 --> 00:11:31,258
You're glowing.
310
00:11:33,560 --> 00:11:35,896
-We got facials.
-Mm-hmm.
311
00:11:35,996 --> 00:11:38,265
That's what facials
is doing now?
312
00:11:39,366 --> 00:11:41,234
Amazing, right?
313
00:11:41,334 --> 00:11:43,103
Mm-hmm.
314
00:11:43,804 --> 00:11:45,172
-Little coochi,
coochi, coochi...
-There she is.
315
00:11:45,272 --> 00:11:46,874
-There's my little baby...
-(babbling)
316
00:11:46,974 --> 00:11:48,308
-(Daphne crying)
-(Marty stammering)
317
00:11:48,408 --> 00:11:50,443
I'm sorry, Daphne.
I'm sorry. I'm sorry.
318
00:11:56,984 --> 00:11:59,519
Do we look weird?
319
00:11:59,586 --> 00:12:02,055
No, child. She just tired.
320
00:12:03,056 --> 00:12:05,258
* *
321
00:12:08,428 --> 00:12:10,898
Why do you hate money?
322
00:12:13,700 --> 00:12:16,103
-Fine. The meeting
was a disaster.
-(groans)
323
00:12:16,203 --> 00:12:18,105
But as my pops always says,
324
00:12:18,205 --> 00:12:19,339
"All money ain't good money."
325
00:12:19,406 --> 00:12:22,142
Your pops is wrong.
326
00:12:22,242 --> 00:12:25,445
The woman flipped over
a seafood tower.
327
00:12:25,578 --> 00:12:26,646
Oh, I know.
328
00:12:26,746 --> 00:12:28,348
It's all over TMZ.
329
00:12:28,448 --> 00:12:31,184
-(groans)
-The entire Bravo universe
is talking about it.
330
00:12:31,284 --> 00:12:35,956
See, this is what happens when
you don't go through the people.
331
00:12:37,757 --> 00:12:40,293
Lisa, I am not going
to take a job
332
00:12:40,427 --> 00:12:42,429
if it costs me my self-respect.
333
00:12:42,562 --> 00:12:44,497
Self-respect? Ha.
334
00:12:44,597 --> 00:12:46,633
You are a writer.
335
00:12:47,935 --> 00:12:51,939
You know the two most common
words in a writer's obituary?
336
00:12:52,039 --> 00:12:54,507
"Died penniless."
337
00:12:55,809 --> 00:12:57,144
Okay, fine.
338
00:12:57,277 --> 00:12:59,679
What do you want me to do,
go back and apologize?
339
00:12:59,779 --> 00:13:00,948
Apologize?
340
00:13:01,048 --> 00:13:02,315
No.
341
00:13:02,449 --> 00:13:04,384
I want you to grovel.
342
00:13:05,085 --> 00:13:06,686
*
343
00:13:06,786 --> 00:13:09,089
It still looks good, right?
344
00:13:09,156 --> 00:13:10,057
I can't tell.
345
00:13:10,157 --> 00:13:11,291
Your screen is frozen.
346
00:13:11,391 --> 00:13:13,793
I thought
your screen was frozen!
347
00:13:14,627 --> 00:13:16,663
Oh, damn.
348
00:13:18,131 --> 00:13:19,466
W-Well, don't worry.
349
00:13:19,566 --> 00:13:21,568
It'll all be back to normal
in a few weeks.
350
00:13:21,668 --> 00:13:23,837
A few weeks?
351
00:13:24,637 --> 00:13:26,406
Got to go.
352
00:13:26,473 --> 00:13:28,942
Well, the streak continues.
353
00:13:29,009 --> 00:13:32,679
What a banner year it is
for David Seymour Johnson.
354
00:13:33,780 --> 00:13:36,616
You know, Calvin hates
where they're putting his rose.
355
00:13:36,716 --> 00:13:39,019
GEMMA:
I'm sure
you're just overreacting.
356
00:13:39,152 --> 00:13:42,923
Overreact-- Gemma,
I am underreacting.
357
00:13:43,023 --> 00:13:45,425
Okay, I wanted
to honor my best friend
358
00:13:45,492 --> 00:13:46,860
and I've hurt him.
359
00:13:46,994 --> 00:13:49,662
Me and the 400 people
who signed my petition.
360
00:13:49,796 --> 00:13:51,464
And I was very aggressive.
361
00:13:51,531 --> 00:13:53,833
I'm banned
from Trader Joe's now, Gemma.
362
00:13:53,934 --> 00:13:56,169
Trader Joe's!
363
00:13:59,006 --> 00:14:00,407
And the worst part of all--
364
00:14:00,507 --> 00:14:02,842
my own wife
won't even look at me.
365
00:14:02,943 --> 00:14:05,712
Dave, of course
I'll look at you.
366
00:14:10,483 --> 00:14:13,921
The cold disdain on your face
says it all!
367
00:14:15,322 --> 00:14:17,490
*
368
00:14:21,128 --> 00:14:23,763
You know, I can't believe
369
00:14:23,863 --> 00:14:25,765
I have to go
to this stupid ceremony
370
00:14:25,865 --> 00:14:27,034
and act like it's an honor.
371
00:14:27,134 --> 00:14:28,335
I can't believe
372
00:14:28,401 --> 00:14:30,938
I have to show my weird-ass face
in public.
373
00:14:33,706 --> 00:14:37,477
Babe, you are still the most
beautiful woman in the world
374
00:14:37,577 --> 00:14:38,979
to me. Mmm.
375
00:14:39,046 --> 00:14:41,081
I can't move my lips, Calvin.
376
00:14:41,181 --> 00:14:42,215
(chuckles)
377
00:14:42,349 --> 00:14:44,717
And you don't have to.
(chuckling)
378
00:14:47,387 --> 00:14:50,023
Nice. Nice.
379
00:14:53,193 --> 00:14:55,662
Calvin, we need to talk.
380
00:14:55,728 --> 00:14:58,031
Dave is really hurt.
381
00:14:58,098 --> 00:15:00,567
Oh, no. Did he try
to open a jar again?
382
00:15:00,700 --> 00:15:02,102
No.
383
00:15:02,936 --> 00:15:06,039
Because he's the one
who went to all that trouble
384
00:15:06,139 --> 00:15:07,674
to get you that rose.
385
00:15:07,740 --> 00:15:08,942
He did?
386
00:15:09,042 --> 00:15:10,243
Why would he do that?
387
00:15:10,343 --> 00:15:13,746
Okay, don't tell Dave
I showed you this.
388
00:15:13,846 --> 00:15:16,149
But here's the letter
he wrote to the city.
389
00:15:17,017 --> 00:15:18,585
"Seven years ago,
390
00:15:18,685 --> 00:15:22,422
"my family moved
from a small town of 75,000
391
00:15:22,522 --> 00:15:23,890
"to Los Angeles,
392
00:15:23,957 --> 00:15:26,960
"a city so big
I couldn't comprehend it.
393
00:15:27,794 --> 00:15:29,762
"I was scared.
394
00:15:29,862 --> 00:15:32,332
"I didn't want my wife
and son to know it.
395
00:15:32,432 --> 00:15:35,602
"And then one man
changed everything,
396
00:15:35,702 --> 00:15:37,704
"not just for my family but...
397
00:15:37,804 --> 00:15:40,340
for everyone in Pasadena."
398
00:15:41,274 --> 00:15:42,209
Damn it.
399
00:15:42,309 --> 00:15:43,510
What?
400
00:15:43,610 --> 00:15:44,944
That son of a bitch
wrote the nicest letter
401
00:15:45,045 --> 00:15:46,279
I ever read in my life.
402
00:15:48,115 --> 00:15:49,949
* *
403
00:15:52,785 --> 00:15:54,954
Malcolm. I'm glad you're back.
404
00:15:55,055 --> 00:15:56,856
-You are?
-Yeah.
405
00:15:56,956 --> 00:15:59,092
You were great before,
by the way.
406
00:15:59,192 --> 00:16:01,094
Yeah, wait, uh, what was great?
407
00:16:01,161 --> 00:16:02,962
You acting all confused.
408
00:16:03,063 --> 00:16:04,297
"But-but-but."
(chuckles)
409
00:16:04,431 --> 00:16:05,932
And then when I flipped
the seafood tower,
410
00:16:06,033 --> 00:16:07,567
your face was priceless.
411
00:16:07,634 --> 00:16:08,835
My face was real.
412
00:16:08,935 --> 00:16:11,038
I have post-traumatic
shrimp disorder.
413
00:16:11,804 --> 00:16:14,541
Wait. Do you not know
what I was doing there?
414
00:16:14,641 --> 00:16:15,975
-(stammers, chuckles)
-Oh, my God.
415
00:16:16,109 --> 00:16:19,179
Malcolm, my restaurant
is my stage.
416
00:16:19,312 --> 00:16:20,613
People come here to see Mercedes
417
00:16:20,680 --> 00:16:22,182
from The Trophy Divas
of Brentwood.
418
00:16:22,315 --> 00:16:24,217
Once I saw some fans were
filming me, pfft,
419
00:16:24,317 --> 00:16:25,852
shrimp had to fly.
420
00:16:27,454 --> 00:16:30,457
(chuckles): Okay.
So, uh, that was all for show?
421
00:16:30,557 --> 00:16:31,824
Yes.
(scoffs)
422
00:16:31,924 --> 00:16:34,161
My fans expect
a certain level of drama.
423
00:16:34,261 --> 00:16:35,328
It's in my contract, actually.
424
00:16:35,462 --> 00:16:37,397
Two public outbursts
a week, minimum.
425
00:16:39,366 --> 00:16:40,800
Okay, so, uh...
426
00:16:40,867 --> 00:16:42,135
I'm not fired?
427
00:16:42,235 --> 00:16:43,503
Please.
(chuckles)
428
00:16:43,603 --> 00:16:46,039
I read your pages,
and I am very excited.
429
00:16:46,873 --> 00:16:48,241
One tiny thing.
430
00:16:48,341 --> 00:16:49,209
Okay.
431
00:16:49,342 --> 00:16:51,778
They're just a little smutty.
432
00:16:51,844 --> 00:16:53,880
Well, I can tone that down.
433
00:16:53,980 --> 00:16:54,881
No, no, no.
434
00:16:54,981 --> 00:16:56,015
They're just a little smutty.
435
00:16:56,116 --> 00:16:58,051
I want them a lot smutty.
436
00:16:58,185 --> 00:17:00,320
I'm talking smut city.
437
00:17:00,420 --> 00:17:01,388
Can you do that?
438
00:17:01,521 --> 00:17:02,622
Smut city?
439
00:17:02,689 --> 00:17:03,956
-I'm the mayor. Yeah.
-(chuckles)
440
00:17:04,057 --> 00:17:04,991
I can do that.
441
00:17:05,092 --> 00:17:06,659
Great. But keep it real.
442
00:17:06,759 --> 00:17:09,496
You know, just like your story
about the boxer and the teacher.
443
00:17:10,363 --> 00:17:12,132
Except filthy.
(chuckles)
444
00:17:12,199 --> 00:17:14,534
Wait a minute,
you read my story?
445
00:17:14,666 --> 00:17:16,903
Yes. What,
you think I don't read?
446
00:17:17,036 --> 00:17:18,271
Well, I-I...
447
00:17:18,371 --> 00:17:20,807
Okay, maybe I misjudged you.
448
00:17:20,873 --> 00:17:23,376
But, in fairness,
your tagline on your show is
449
00:17:23,476 --> 00:17:26,179
"I don't read books.
I read bitches."
450
00:17:26,945 --> 00:17:29,582
Well, between you and me,
451
00:17:29,716 --> 00:17:31,050
I read both.
452
00:17:32,385 --> 00:17:34,053
Okay.
453
00:17:34,821 --> 00:17:36,489
(siren wailing)
454
00:17:36,589 --> 00:17:38,725
Hoo-hoo! Dad.
455
00:17:38,858 --> 00:17:40,493
I got to say, man,
I'm really proud of you.
456
00:17:40,593 --> 00:17:42,495
Oh. Thank you, son.
(chuckles)
457
00:17:42,595 --> 00:17:45,432
I think this neighborhood
is kind of hip and funky.
458
00:17:45,565 --> 00:17:47,867
Look, that motel has...
459
00:17:47,967 --> 00:17:50,503
air conditioning and HBO.
460
00:17:50,603 --> 00:17:52,905
Great. Maybe after this,
we can go get a prostitute
461
00:17:53,005 --> 00:17:55,775
and watch the Entourage movie.
462
00:17:55,908 --> 00:17:58,077
(soft chatter)
463
00:17:59,579 --> 00:18:00,847
Where's Daphne?
464
00:18:00,947 --> 00:18:02,282
I left her home.
465
00:18:02,415 --> 00:18:04,617
Between the pack
of loose pit bulls and...
466
00:18:04,751 --> 00:18:06,085
Mom's face...
467
00:18:07,019 --> 00:18:08,921
(speaking inaudibly)
468
00:18:09,021 --> 00:18:11,158
Yeah, that's a good call.
469
00:18:13,260 --> 00:18:15,462
(applause)
470
00:18:16,596 --> 00:18:17,897
Thank you.
471
00:18:17,997 --> 00:18:20,533
Thank-Thanks, everybody,
for coming out here today.
472
00:18:20,633 --> 00:18:23,170
You know, I got to say,
when I first saw
473
00:18:23,270 --> 00:18:25,305
where I was getting my rose,
474
00:18:25,405 --> 00:18:27,140
I was like, "Nah."
475
00:18:28,141 --> 00:18:31,110
You know, this isn't the nicest
block in the neighborhood.
476
00:18:31,244 --> 00:18:34,614
And-and-and, in fact,
it may be the worst.
477
00:18:35,582 --> 00:18:37,817
But... then I read a letter.
478
00:18:37,950 --> 00:18:41,388
A letter written
by this man right here.
479
00:18:41,488 --> 00:18:42,755
Dave Johnson.
480
00:18:43,556 --> 00:18:44,991
(quietly):
You showed him my letter?
481
00:18:45,091 --> 00:18:46,226
(quietly): I know
you didn't want me to, but I--
482
00:18:46,326 --> 00:18:47,760
That's right. I'm Dave Johnson.
483
00:18:47,860 --> 00:18:49,262
I wrote the letter.
484
00:18:49,362 --> 00:18:51,598
Dave, Dave, Dave, Dave,
get up here, man. Come on.
485
00:18:51,698 --> 00:18:52,832
All right. Okay.
486
00:18:52,932 --> 00:18:54,934
-So--
-No, no. No, no, Dave. I got it.
487
00:18:55,034 --> 00:18:56,035
Please. Come on.
488
00:18:56,135 --> 00:18:57,237
Gotcha.
489
00:18:57,337 --> 00:18:59,172
You know, Dave's letter
490
00:18:59,272 --> 00:19:02,675
made me realize that,
even in a city this big,
491
00:19:02,809 --> 00:19:04,477
any one of us
can make a difference.
492
00:19:04,611 --> 00:19:05,845
(others agreeing)
493
00:19:05,978 --> 00:19:08,948
So it's not where your rose is--
494
00:19:09,048 --> 00:19:11,651
it's where your heart is.
495
00:19:11,751 --> 00:19:14,053
And my heart is here
in Pasadena.
496
00:19:14,153 --> 00:19:17,624
So, though this rose
may have my name on it,
497
00:19:17,690 --> 00:19:20,760
it also belongs
to this man right here
498
00:19:20,827 --> 00:19:22,862
who's become
one of my best friends.
499
00:19:22,962 --> 00:19:24,130
One of?
500
00:19:26,165 --> 00:19:27,400
Look, Dave,
501
00:19:27,500 --> 00:19:30,470
I just want to thank you
for helping me realize
502
00:19:30,537 --> 00:19:34,140
that it's not the neighborhood
who make the people.
503
00:19:34,941 --> 00:19:37,176
It's the people
who make the neighborhood.
504
00:19:37,277 --> 00:19:39,779
-Beautiful. Just beautiful.
-CALVIN: Am I right?
-(cheering)
505
00:19:39,846 --> 00:19:41,681
Am I right about it?
506
00:19:41,814 --> 00:19:43,650
All right, well, good.
Good news, 'cause--
507
00:19:43,750 --> 00:19:45,552
because I just want you to know
508
00:19:45,652 --> 00:19:48,255
I have a bunch of shovels, rakes
509
00:19:48,355 --> 00:19:50,557
and dustpans and trash bags
510
00:19:50,690 --> 00:19:51,958
and we're gonna clean this up
together.
511
00:19:52,058 --> 00:19:53,226
Who's with me?
512
00:19:56,829 --> 00:19:57,764
Anybody?
513
00:19:57,864 --> 00:19:59,366
-Yeah, I'm with you!
-Yeah!
514
00:19:59,466 --> 00:20:01,534
There you go. Come on.
Guys, come on. Who's with me?
515
00:20:01,634 --> 00:20:02,969
-Let's do it!
-Yeah.
516
00:20:03,035 --> 00:20:04,404
-Let's clean it up.
-Come on. Let's make this
517
00:20:04,537 --> 00:20:06,706
a block that all of us Pasadini
518
00:20:06,839 --> 00:20:08,140
-can be proud of!
-Yeah!
519
00:20:08,241 --> 00:20:10,577
-Let's do this!
-(applause)
520
00:20:11,478 --> 00:20:13,079
Good, good.
521
00:20:13,212 --> 00:20:15,982
Uh-uh, Marty Butler!
522
00:20:16,048 --> 00:20:17,149
Come back here.
523
00:20:17,216 --> 00:20:19,118
* *
524
00:20:23,723 --> 00:20:24,791
Okay, people.
525
00:20:24,924 --> 00:20:26,058
Smile.
526
00:20:27,927 --> 00:20:29,496
Okay, one more.
527
00:20:29,596 --> 00:20:31,331
Everybody smile.
528
00:20:36,303 --> 00:20:37,804
Okay, the two ladies,
can I get a--
529
00:20:37,904 --> 00:20:38,805
We can't smile!
530
00:20:38,905 --> 00:20:40,507
Just take the damn picture!
531
00:20:42,342 --> 00:20:43,743
I got your TV.
532
00:20:43,843 --> 00:20:45,412
Get your ass off my rose.
533
00:20:46,479 --> 00:20:48,681
* *
534
00:20:54,053 --> 00:20:58,090
Captioning sponsored by
CBS
535
00:20:58,157 --> 00:21:01,828
and TOYOTA.
536
00:21:01,961 --> 00:21:06,366
Captioned by
Media Access Group at WGBH
access.wgbh.org
36475
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