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You're watching C -SPAN.
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Thank you.
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We take you now to the White House Daily
Briefing, where Press Secretary
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Caroline Leavitt is about to have a day.
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Greetings, everyone.
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How's it going?
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I am just so excited to be here and
answer your friendly questions.
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As you all know, there was no news this
week.
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Nothing happening with the president. No
weird information was revealed.
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No one had any accusations that rhyme
with edophile.
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So I'll open the floor to questions,
starting with Caitlin Collins from CNN,
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I openly hate. Go ahead.
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Okay, well, I think we definitely need
to start with the 20 ,000 Epstein
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Why does President Trump's name appear
in so many of them?
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You know you suck, right?
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Trump has asked the DOJ to investigate
Democrats' ties to Epstein, but is
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investigating Trump?
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Look, the only thing these emails prove
is that President Trump did nothing
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wrong. If anything, his crime was loving
too much. And possibly too young.
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Now, let's get a relevant question, Fox
News.
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Unnamed black guy, Fox News.
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Is President Trump too healthy?
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Thank you.
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And yes, he got his 30th physical last
week and it went great.
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He took a cognitive test and did so
well, they said we'd like to see you
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as soon as possible.
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Yes, MSNBC, go ahead.
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Are you not worried about the objects of
Trump giving Epstein's partner in
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crime, Delaine Maxwell, a sweetheart
deal?
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Hey. Ghislaine Maxwell said in the sworn
deposition she gave to Trump's friend
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that Trump always acted like a
gentleman.
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And a little thing about me, I believe
women.
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Now seriously, can we please move off
the topic of Epstein?
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Sure. Is it true the administration
secretly sent $840 million to Argentina
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pay off their debts?
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We shall return to Epstein!
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I'm sorry, but even Trump's biggest
supporters think that he should release
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Epstein files. What does Trump have to
hide?
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I could answer that. I am hiding almost
nothing.
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Just enough to make it extremely
suspicious. But let me ask you a
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there was something incriminating about
me in the files, then why would I cover
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them up?
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Isn't that exactly why you would cover
them up?
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Okay, let me go again. If I was
innocent, wouldn't I just release all
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Yes.
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Again, I think you're agreeing with what
everyone is saying.
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Okay, third time's a charm.
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Jeffrey Epstein, I barely knew the guy,
okay, as evidenced by the thousands of
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pictures of us together dancing and
grinding our teeth at various parties.
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Always leering and pointing at something
just off camera. Probably a book we're
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excited to read.
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Okay, what about the specific email
where Epstein said that Trump was the
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that hasn't barked? Okay, okay, first of
all, all right, I'm not a dog.
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I'm not a dog. I'm more of a cub or
possibly an otter.
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Definitely not a twink. I think that's
clear. Not a twink, right? Maybe twunk.
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You know, gays have words for
everything, right? Geeky.
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We like to say geeky.
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It means talking. Second, I thought
Megyn Kelly made a terrific point this
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She said, Epstein's not a pedophile.
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Terrific thing to just say out of
nowhere. Great job, Megyn.
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We love Megyn. They should put her back
on TV.
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Legalize Megyn.
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So you said you kicked Epstein out of
Mar -a -Lago, but he said he was, quote,
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never a member.
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Yeah, I said I kicked Jeffrey out
because he was a pedophile. But then I
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said I didn't know he did anything
wrong. So it's kind of hard to square
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circle until you realize that Trump
exists across many timelines.
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It's the Trump multiverse theory.
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We just happen to be living in the worst
possible one. Now, if you'll excuse me,
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I'm going to release all of the Epstein
files. This is great. Each file will be.
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on sale for the low, low price of $800.
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Oh, she's pretty. Who's that? She's
beautiful.
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I like that. She's nice.
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You know, this is a beautiful one -of -a
-kind printed -out screenshot in very
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low res of one of the many files
mentioning President Trump. It makes
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stocking stuff. I just ordered the one
that says, Does Putin have the photo of
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Trump blowing Bubba? We love that.
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Whatever the hell that means.
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But I did do one very generous thing
today. I pardoned a turkey, okay, who,
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complete coincidence, is a convicted sex
criminal.
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So we're going to be looking into that
very shortly, I can assure you that. So
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Merry Thanksgiving. We're going to be
saying Merry Thanksgiving again. And
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from New York, it's...
7106
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