Original subtitles

Viv, I know there are only three shopping days left, but they called, and

want to see your house in an hour.

Uh -huh.

Mom, we've got to turn off the music. No problem.

Mom! Mom!

Hang on, Viv.

I should fix the rehearse. That'll help. Clean up the kitchen.

What? Now?

Here you go.

Okay, Viv, I'll see you in a bit.

I thought I told you to clean up the kitchen. I did. Can I go to the movies

tonight with some friends?

No. No.

No, no.

I'm showing a house and I need you to babysit Kevin. Why can't Megan do it?

Because she has to go to a rehearsal at the teen center and you don't have to go

to the movies.

I do if I want to life.

You're babysitting Kevin.

Hey, we're at the anyway.

Is it going to be any fun?

Well, of course it will.

Honey, we're going to do all the same things we've always done.

Win Christmas carols, be with family and friends, put cookies and milk out for

Santa.

It's going to be just the same.

Except this year.

No, Dad.

Right. That's the one thing that's different.

Why don't you just get back together?

Honey, we're just going to have to let that go.

That's a no, right?

I mean, some things are just out of our control.

I know you miss your dad.

And he loves me very much.

You both do.

And it has nothing to do with me.

Did he tell you that?

I'm nine years old. I watch a lot of TV.

Did he leave because of me?

No.

Of course not.

I knew it. It was Buzz and Megan.

Oh, it wasn't any one or any one thing.

Then what was it?

That's not easy to explain.

But sometimes when people are married for a long time, they get into kind of a

rut. You know what a rut is?

Yeah, like when people aren't having any fun and they're really bored.

Kind of like that.

And will you come downstairs when you're ready?

Get off your brother.

Shouldn't you be rehearsing?

Hey, how are you getting to the teen center? After mom's picking me up in a

hour.

Can I please go to the movies? No, I told you, you're watching Kevin.

Please let him go.

I'll stay home alone.

No.

I've done it before.

Don't remind me.

You laughed up my whole night.

And if I'm going to be miserable, you're going to be miserable.

Hey, Buzz.

Okay, gosh, the place is great. Really nice decorations.

Same as every year.

So, um, Dad, why'd you come tonight?

Actually, I want to talk to your mom about something.

Privately.

Do you think he wants to come home?

Aw, Kev.

Oh, I'm sorry. I have a business appointment, Peter. What do you want?

wasn't going to jump right into it, but... Well, you know, Natalie and I are

living together, and... Well, when our divorce is final, I'm going to marry

Really?

You're getting married again?

Wow, that's, uh...

Wow, we've only been separated eight months.

Yeah, it just happened real quickly.

Listen, Kate, I really want the kids to spend a little time with me over the

holidays.

You want the kids for Christmas?

Just a couple of days.

I want her to get to know Natalie better.

Oh, because she's going to be their stepmother.

Yeah.

Well, you're going to have to ask them.

I know.

How am I supposed to see my friends?

It's only for a few days.

Well, duh, but that's just long enough for me to fall out of the loop.

Yeah, you can't expect us to give up our vacation.

Well, Kevin, there's a royal family coming to visit.

They have a son around your age. Actually, you might have a chance to

a crown prince.

A crown prince?

Wouldn't that be cool?

Yeah. Way cool. Oh, and you guys wouldn't believe the room that Natalie

up for you.

What do you say?

I think I'm going to pass.

It just wouldn't be right leaving the family at Christmas.

I'm sure you understand.

Yeah, yeah, I do.

Well, it's an open invitation.

I won't be back too late.

And since you're staying home, it wouldn't hurt to do some of your chores.

Yes, ma 'am.

I'll make sure they get done.

Ow! My fault.

Hello, I'm home.

Hey, how'd it go?

Awful. I hate buds, and I never want to be stuck home alone with them as long as

I live.

Oh, honey, I know he picks on you.

Picks on me?

Humiliates me.

Tortures me. I'm sick of being everyone's favorite joke around here.

Yeah, yeah, it's hard to be the youngest.

Well, I hate buds.

I wish I didn't have a brother or a sister.

Well, you don't mean that.

Yes, I do. I wish I was an only child.

I'm sorry that you're so unhappy.

Maybe you should go to your room and think about what you have rather than

you don't have.

Only children don't know how good they have it.

Life would be perfect if Buzz and Meg and Marna were.

I mean, is it too much to ask if your family actually likes me?

I'd run away.

Find where to run to.

Hey, I do.

I have an open invitation.

Thanks, Alan.

Hey.

Oh, what an incredible evening.

And not a bad night's work.

We raised over two million for those children's charities.

Door open.

And I am on the verge of signing two of the biggest clients in Chicago.

That's because you're the best publicist in the world.

Door's closed.

Have I remembered to thank you for telling everyone that?

Firelight. Not tonight, you haven't. Perhaps I had to show my appreciation.

Music on.

Here you go.

Oh,

nuts. Just when things were getting... Good.

Nice house, huh, Pumpkin?

Sure is, Mom.

You sure you don't want to rob it?

No. No, I don't want to rob it. My robbery days are over.

Look, darling, we're moving up to the big money, all right? The easy money. No

middleman. You're a robber.

Strictly a class operation, huh? Three words, Vera.

Kid. Nat.

Thing.

I think there's only one more.

We're going to wait for the royals to arrive.

And then we're going to kidnap the prince.

Oh, don't kidnap me. I'm chanting.

You sure we can pull it off?

I mean, without Harry making the plans?

Look where Harry's plans kept landing me, huh? In jail.

Well, not this time.

Because this time, I'm the boss.

Who's boss?

You're the boss. I love being married, huh?

Looks like they got a visitor.

This where do you want to vote?

Yeah, this is the place.

Thank you very much.

Hip change.

It's all change.

Who are you?

Beg pardon, ma 'am.

Yes, Prescott?

Mr. McAllister has a visitor.

The young man claims to be his son.

Well, send him in.

Captain! Dad!

Hey! Oh, I thought you said you weren't coming.

Well, I started thinking, hey, it's not fair if Mom gets all the kids for

Christmas. What's Christmas without kids, right?

Right. Hello, Kevin.

Hi, Adelie. I hope you don't mind me just dropping in like this, but my dad

invite me. Yes, I know.

So is the invitation still open?

Of course it is.

Molly, would you come here, please?

I've been looking forward to spending time with you.

Your dad talks about you kids a lot.

Buzz is the troublemaker.

I'm the adorable one.

Oh, Molly.

This is Kevin McAllister, and he's going to be staying with us for a few days.

Would you make up the special guest room?

Ah, the special guest room.

Right away, ma 'am.

Oh, and Prescott, give Kevin a house key.

If you say so, ma 'am.

What kind of key is this?

It's the key to the whole house.

This is a smart house, Kevin. It does whatever you tell it to.

Fire out.

Curtains open.

Wow. I think I'm going to like it here.

Go ahead. You try.

Door open.

Oh,

yeah.

This is so cool.

Think you'll be comfortable here?

I'll see.

Thanks, Natalie. This is going to be the best Christmas ever.

Let's go, Kev.

Hey, Kevin.

Kevin.

How many times can I lose this child?

I want to let you know Kevin just got here.

Oh, thank God.

He got there safely.

I was going to call you right off. You okay?

Yeah.

Yes, I'm fine.

Well, thanks for letting him come.

Well, thanks for calling.

Merry Christmas.

Good morning, Kevin.

Good morning.

Who's there?

Over here, dear.

Hey.

Hi. Breakfast time. Anything special you'd like?

Anything? Anything.

Sometimes I can't wait for Santa to come, so I end up doing some shopping by

myself.

Would you like to open one? No, you're going to spoil him. Dad, it's her house.

If she wants to spoil me, she can spoil me.

All right, but just one. And not the biggest.

Does it really fly?

It really does, but only outside. We don't want to break anything.

The royal family's coming for one of Natalie's fundraisers, and it's my job

make sure the event's well covered by press and photographers.

Hey, it's not going to take that long.

And I won't have to work for the rest of your vacation, okay? And if you need

anything, ask Prescott.

He'll take care of you.

A cool plane, huh?

I think she's trying to buy my affection.

Kevin. What?

I'm not saying it's a bad thing.

I'm glad you're here.

you a question?

Yes.

Can you make a milkshake?

Just chocolate.

What? Natalie said anything I need.

And you need a milkshake deal. A chocolate one.

This is more of a white Christmas.

Highly unlikely, given the recent unseasonable temperatures.

What's this place?

Called a dumb waiter.

Why is it called a waiter? Because it carries food.

Why is it called dumb?

Because it doesn't speak or ask countless idiotic questions.

You read?

The door.

No entry?

What, does that mean me?

Especially you.

This is the control center from which I manage this entire household, as well as

my personal quarters.

Now, Miss Natalie may have granted you run of her own, but this is my domain,

and strictly off -limits, understood?

Any more questions?

Good.

Hey, Molly, what you doing?

Cleaning the house.

Gross. Oh, no, no. Not in this house.

Watch.

Vacuum on.

Back room, off.

Wow, the place is including itself.

Want to see something really cool?

Open sesame.

Wow, this place is awesome.

Yes, it is.

Wow, I feel good.

I knew that I wouldn't.

I knew that I would not.

So good.

So good.

I got you.

I feel nice.

The sugar is fine.

I feel nice.

The sugar is fine.

Look on that, dear child.

Door open.

She's out of the house.

All right.

Coast is clear. Let's go.

Wait. Are you sure it's safe?

Pumpkin, would I take you in there if it wasn't safe?

It's just if the prints don't arrive till tomorrow...

Why are we going in there now?

To get the lay of the land.

What do you think, Vera? We're just going to go in there tomorrow and start

grabbing kids?

Ooh, everybody get in the van.

No. We've got to figure out the where, the when, how to get them out of there.

You know the secret to criminal success.

Not getting caught.

Planning.

Preparation. Be prepared. Be a prepared preparator. Huh?

That's my motto, and that's why I'm... A Boy Scout.

No, the boss.

Huh? Who's the boss?

You're the boss. Where's the boss?

Right here. Hey, boss, party of one. Right there.

All right, let's go.

No, it can't be.

Alarm is on. Oh, no. What are we going to do?

Watch this, huh?

Alarm? Oh.

Door open.

That is one -handed gadget. Well, what's my motto?

You're the boss.

Be prepared.

Yeah.

I married a genius.

What do you think that is? Is that a turkey? Just put that down, okay?

Clepto here.

All right. The prince should be staying in one of these rooms.

That's enough.

Don't give me such a headache.

You're giving me a headache. You're giving me a headache. You are giving me

headache. Don't push me.

Door open.

Mom?

Door was shutting.

What's wrong with this thing? Door open!

I think there's someone in here.

Anybody in here?

Well, not now.

Hello, Marv. What?

Long time no see.

Is that the prince?

No, that's Kevin. Kevin Vera Vera Kevin.

Well, that ain't him. Let's get out of here before somebody sees us. Yeah, I

think we got to lay the land.

I'll be back.

tell him what happened?

Maybe he'll be okay with it.

Or maybe not.

Okay, I know it looks bad, but... Honey, what's up?

Kevin, what...

Kevin, what happened?

It wasn't me.

It was the burglars. The burglars? Yeah. And you recognize the one guy, Mark.

Did I ever tell you about him?

Well, that's another story. But the point is, they're going to rip off your

house. So you chose instead to trash it? No, I was trying to protect it. By

trashing it?

What in the name of... Hey, why didn't you come when I was calling you?

Prescott?

Were you aware of any burglars here today?

Burglars?

No, ma 'am.

All the alarms were on, as usual.

Well, maybe they turned them off. They had one of these, you know.

I saw no intruders, and except for, beg pardon, ma 'am, the briefest of bathroom

breaks, my eyes were on the monitors at all times.

How one child could do so much damage in the time it took me to... Oh, it's

quite beyond me.

It wasn't me.

Well, there was no one else here.

He's mine.

I'm not. Or two.

I'm not.

Or two.

With all due respect, sir.

I did see Master Kevin playing with the devices as if the house were a big toy.

The only hooligan here today was your son.

Give us a minute.

Kevin.

You know, I can forgive just about anything but lying.

Oh, right. So you wouldn't get mad if I wrecked the place, which I didn't, as

long as I admit that I did, which I didn't.

Well, I thought this over, and I understand that this is a difficult

for you.

And it's only natural that you'd be acting out. It's a need for attention.

it isn't. Kevin.

Anyway... Anyway...

Well, it's a little damage.

It's not as if I'm not insured.

Well, do you have something to say?

Thank you.

And?

I'm sorry for the damage of your house.

Security cameras must have got the whole thing on tape.

What?

Prescott must have turned off the cameras.

It's unbelievable.

It is not to be believed.

I can't believe this.

It's the lousy kid again.

Everywhere I break into.

It's like he's stalking me or something.

Come on, Mom. He's just a little boy.

Yeah, well, I got big scars from that little... Never mind.

I'll tell you one thing.

This time, he's not going to mess me up.

Uh -huh. This time, it's all going to go smooth as silk.

Because this time, I got an inside man.

Thank you.

What are you doing here?

Tell me.

I, uh, I... Nothing, I swear.

I just thought all this was kind of cool, so I wanted to take a look at it.

don't go to other people's homes uninvited, and you don't touch their

Didn't I warn you what would happen if I ever caught you in here again?

Not specifically.

Trust me, it won't be pleasant.

What do you want?

I thought I heard the boy.

Ah, and indeed I did.

I don't want him bothering you anymore, so I'll just get him out of your way.

Come along, Kevin.

He'll be my responsibility from now on.

Thank you for saving me, Molly.

Prescott is a good person to stay away from.

You're telling me. He's one of the bad guys.

The bad guys who broke into the house.

Although, technically, he didn't break in because they had their own remote.

And who do you think gave them that?

Prescott? Mm -hmm. That sounds a bit far -fetched to me. I know, and you

probably think I have an overactive imagination.

Most people do, but you have to believe me. Kevin, Prescott... He's a lonely

man. The only thing he has is this job. And between you and me, he hates working

here. But to do what you're suggesting... Then it all makes perfect

hates this job, so he tries to pull off a big high so he can afford to quit.

Ah, I don't know.

Listen, he told my dad I was lying when I wasn't. And he shut off the security

camera. So it can only mean one thing.

And that is?

Marv and his new friend have a new side...

I think you're right. I am?

Yeah. You do have an overactive imagination.

But that's what I love about children.

My own son was the same as you at your age. A real handful.

You must have been a great mom, Molly.

Why don't you just try to keep that imagination under control, okay?

You're very understanding about what happened.

Well, Kevin's going through a difficult time.

Not easy when your parents split up. Believe me, I know.

But we'll get through it.

You're gonna be a great stepmom.

I think we just need to figure out a way to make him feel more at home here.

Maybe do some of the Christmas things he's used to doing, like trimming the

tree. You do that yourself?

Yes, I do that myself.

It's fun.

But that's exactly what we're going to do. We're going to trim the tree. It'll

get us in the spirit of things united as a family.

Okay. Okay?

No friends, no fun, no snow.

This is definitely going to be the worst Christmas ever.

Hey, Kev, how you doing?

What do you say we just forget about today and start over, huh?

You mean it? Yeah.

You know, Natalie's really a great person. We've just got to get to know

better.

I think we should start having a little more fun around here.

I could go with that.

Yeah?

Why don't we start by trimming that tree?

Yeah? Sure, why not?

Tingle bells, tingles all the way.

Oh, what fun it is to ride in a one -horse open sleigh. Nothing you don't

in a one -horse open sleigh. Over the hills we go, oh, laughing all the

way. The lumbar fields we make.

We'll be there. We wouldn't miss it.

Let me call you back.

Evangelista's in town.

Margaret's just throwing together a little impromptu supper, but we

go, should we?

Well, why don't you just go ahead without me, and Kevin and I'll finish up

here. Really?

You wouldn't mind?

No.

They're your friends anyway.

You're an angel.

I won't be home late.

Okay.

Where were we?

You don't have to stay because of me.

No, I want to stay.

Really.

So, does Natalie go out every night?

Pretty much. She leads a very exciting life. More exciting than we're used to.

So, you'd say you're not in a rut?

I'm not in a rut.

Why?

I thought maybe that's why you left.

Kevin.

Kevin, you know, I didn't leave your mom to be with Natalie, okay? That just

kind of happened later.

You want to tell me about it?

Look, adult relationships are just complicated.

Sometimes when two people get married really young, like your mom and I did,

just end up feeling kind of... You miss out on some things.

Yeah. I mean, just because you grow up on the outside doesn't mean you want to

stop having fun and enjoying life.

I know all about the inner child, Dad.

You do, huh?

That's why old guys drive sports cars.

You're probably right.

But the trouble with sports cars?

No room for anybody else.

Maybe one other person, Max.

But if you want to take a real road trip, with luggage and all, you don't

have room for a friend.

I mean, they're cool and fast and all, but who wants to be in a nice car when

you're all alone?

Well, that looks just about perfect.

All that's left to do now is put on the star.

Do you have no interest on the star?

That's right, he does, doesn't he?

Yeah, I always hold him up.

Then I give him a wedgie.

He makes a fuss, we all laugh.

Well, I guess we're just going to have to use the ladder this year.

Great, we'll be down now.

it's pretty good i think it looks great i think it's our best

You're finally up.

What did you do to our tree?

Oh, that's my fault.

I have a standing appointment with the tree decorators every year, and in all

the excitement, I forgot to cancel.

Are you ever going to forgive me?

You undid our tree.

Well, it would have had to come down eventually anyway.

Yeah, come on, Kev. Look at all these presents, huh?

Oh, wait. Ooh, here's a big one. I believe it has... Yes, it has your name

it. Come on, why don't you open it up? It's for Natalie and me.

But shouldn't I open it tomorrow on Christmas?

You got plenty to open tomorrow.

Come on, one won't hurt. Go ahead.

Super spy bugging and listening device. Isn't that cool?

Yeah. Thanks, Dad.

Thanks, Natalie.

I'm glad you like it.

Hey, Mom, where are you going?

I'm going to take Kevin some things. Mom, where are you going? He doesn't

any clean clothes with him, and I'm sure he doesn't have any toys to play with.

Let's check out Dad's girlfriend.

Want to go?

May I help you?

Wow. I'm here for Kevin McAllister.

Wow. Buzz? Are you here to take him home?

No. I have something for him.

How do I sound?

Kids, stay close.

Mom!

Hey!

Hey,

you guys remember Natalie, right? It does, Megan.

Oh, and Kate, this is Natalie. Natalie, Kate.

Hello, Kate.

Hello.

So, are you guys going to stay?

No. No, I just brought some of your stuff.

You guys have got to see this house.

Is that okay, Natalie? Of course. Be my guest.

Awesome tree.

It used to look better. Wait, what is this thing on your head?

It's a spy kit that Natalie got me for an early Christmas present. Isn't that

cool?

That was nice of you.

Well, I'm very fond of your kid.

Guys, I've got to show you this airplane that she got me.

Oh, no, thank you.

I didn't know he would have all this stuff to play with.

Oh, God, hey, let me get that.

Well, I wasn't even sure he could even sleep without it. Gosh, you know what? I

cannot believe he hasn't even asked for it.

Well, we could buy him another stuffed animal.

Oh, no, no. No.

This is Teddy.

Ah, Teddy is a transitional object.

Yeah.

Transitional object.

It's like something very, very special.

Child care is with them everywhere.

Actually, you're supposed to have a spare in case something happens to it.

course, we only had one, remember?

Oh, how could I forget?

We were driving down the highway, like, really in a hurry going somewhere. Of

course, Kevin thinks, oh, possibly Teddy might want a little fresh air, right?

So he rolls down the window and out...

Hi, Teddy.

Yeah, he was ballistic. He was crying. He was so upset. It was, oh, my God. So,

Peter pulls over, and I get out to retrieve the bear.

I still can't believe you did that.

Well, it was the slow lane, and there wasn't much traffic.

Yeah, well, I don't know what he would have done if he'd lost him.

Well, I think Kevin's going to have so much fun playing with the prince that

he's not even going to miss the stuffed animal.

It's going to be so wonderful having a house full of children. I'm really

looking forward to it. Children, watch the garden sculpture.

Well, I better get going.

Before they break something.

Well, we're off to the airport to pick up the royal family. You all know how

important this is.

The caterers will be here momentarily. And the guests will arrive about an hour

before you and the royals make your grand entrance.

No need to worry, ma 'am. Everything will be taken care of.

It's just I want everything to go right.

Come on. Let's not be late. I don't want one single thing to go wrong. Door

open. And nothing will.

Oh, good. Finally arrived.

Mr. Prescott!

Mr. Prescott!

You! I'll get him out of your way. Thank you. It's the burglar!

I have just about had enough of you and your melodrama.

Now, this is a very important night, and if I have to lock you up to keep you

out of our way, don't think I won't do it. Look!

Don't trifle with me, you demon spawn!

That's a foolish place to hide.

Kevin, have you seen Prescott?

Not lately.

Ah, typical.

Always poking around when you don't want him and when you need him nowhere to be

found. Ah, guess already, whatever happened to Fashionably Late?

Well, I don't like to boast, but yes, it will be the party of the season.

Oh, I'm getting another call.

All right, see you there.

Hello?

It's been canceled.

Well, so am I.

Devastated.

Well, all right. We'll see you tomorrow.

Merry Christmas.

What are we going to do now?

It's going to be just an ordinary party.

Christmas Eve at your place sounds anything but ordinary to me.

It's hardly the party of Nathan.

Peter.

What if we announce our engagement tonight?

Tonight?

I know we were going to wait until after your divorce was final, but, well, it's

only a few weeks away, and your kids already know, and it'll make tonight so

special.

Well, if it makes you happy.

Where are those guys?

I'm off. I got a tinkle.

There you can tinkle next week.

Door open.

All right. Now, you remember the plan?

Which plan? Harry's plan?

What? No, not Harry's plan. The one involving rope and a bag.

Why are you yelling at me? I'm not yelling.

You remember the plan? Yeah.

Now, when the prince comes up the bed... Bag him. That's right.

We kidnap the kidnap.

You're a genius, Mark.

That's right.

Door open.

The prince goes in the back.

Bag goes out the window.

Uh -huh.

Weeks down the rope, door closed.

Right.

Everybody in the van.

And we're gone before they know what hit them. Beautiful plan, Marv.

Elegant in its simplicity.

All right.

Let's try it out.

Get in the bag.

Me? Why don't you get in the bag?

Because I'm the boss. Get in the bag, Vera.

I don't want to get in the bag.

Vera, just get in the bag, please.

You didn't tell me I was going to get in no bag.

I know. I was saving it. It's going to be fun.

open.

Okay. Get out and stay out.

I know what you're trying to do. Oh, yeah, wise guy?

What? Trying to kidnap the...

Maybe that'd be great. I sure could use him.

We got every word.

Welcome back.

Where's the royal family? They were snowed in.

Where's Prescott?

I can't find him anywhere.

Not? Well, Molly...

Make sure everyone has champagne.

We're going to make a special announcement.

How

are

you? Hi, how are you? Good to see you again.

Everyone may I have your attention?

Huh?

It's always a special night and tonight may be even more special.

It could not be going worse.

Marv, you're on fire.

Oh, thanks, baby. You're not so bad yourself.

No, sweetheart, you're really on fire.

Well, I try to work out. You know...

Kevin, I spoke to all the caterers and to Molly.

Nobody saw a thing but you.

How could that be?

I don't know.

But I heard they're going to kidnap the prince.

You heard them say that?

Yeah, with my super spy bugging device.

And Prescott's involved with the whole thing.

This is absurd.

I'm going to call and make sure the royal family's flight is okay for

Kevin, I know what's going on here. You do?

Yeah.

You're out to destroy my relationship with Natalie.

What? You knew how important tonight was to her, and you went and pulled a crazy

stunt like this. That's not the truth.

I've given you a lot of leeway because I know how tough this divorce has been on

you.

But tonight you went way too far.

Now I want you to go to your room and think about what you've done.

And when you're ready to apologize to Natalie, then we'll talk.

I'm so glad you called.

Are you okay?

Yeah.

I'm just watching It's a Wonderful Life.

You are?

You know how that gets to me.

What year are you on?

Eight.

Oh.

I guess I'm just a sucker for happy endings.

So how's your party? Are you having a good time?

I love you, Kevin.

Love you too, Mom.

Merry Christmas.

Merry Christmas.

Okay, bye.

Kevin, are you awake?

Yeah.

Your father and I were a little rough on you before. Are you okay?

Yeah.

Good.

Because if you ever do anything like that again, you'll be out of this house

fast your head will spin.

Say your father's getting divorced.

Boo -hoo.

Everyone's parents get divorced. That's life. You'll get over it.

But you're not going to come between your father and me.

He wants you in his life, and I think that's admirable.

But if you want him in your life You better not cross me Understood

I'll

have that window fixed first thing in the morning

I've just had a nice little chat with Kevin.

I think we're beginning to understand each other better.

What are you watching?

It's A Wonderful Life.

They've been running it all night. Come on, watch it with me.

I've seen it.

So? So.

I don't understand people who watch movies over and over again.

I thought I cried once was enough.

You've got to be kidding.

Kate and I watch this every year with the kids. It's a family tradition.

Now that you're going to have a new family, maybe it's time for some new

tradition.

They'll be back.

And if no one believes me, I'll have to catch them myself.

Okay, stop.

Then faster.

Get in the back.

Shut up, you bag!

Here's Mr. Morton.

Merry Christmas, Kevin.

Merry Christmas, Dad. Hey.

Peter, are you ready to go?

Go?

Go where?

Kevin, Natalie and I have got to go pick up the royal family right now.

Now? But aren't we going to open presents?

We're going to have to wait until we get back.

But it's Christmas.

And why do you both have to go?

You know how sometimes you've got to do things you don't want to do?

This is one of those times.

Hey, we'll be back before you know it, okay?

And I'm sure nothing will happen while we're gone, am I right?

Right. Good.

Hang in there.

It won't be long.

Hello. No, we're awake.

Go away.

Shh.

All right, we're on our way.

Boy, sure makes me nervous.

Let's go, Pookie.

I knew it.

First step, eliminate the inside man.

Oh, Mr. Prescott.

And what would that be? Another milkshake, perhaps?

No, a bottle of wine. Excuse me.

Natalie said we need to get some wine from the basement for the royal family.

If we must.

So I guess you're right.

We're not going to have any snow this Christmas. One can never go wrong with

expectations.

You know, Mr. Prescott, it's been great spending time with you these last few

days. Time flies when you're having fun.

I know we got off to a bad start.

But things can be better.

Much better.

As you're down there, now I'm up here.

Young man, open this door. Let me out of here.

Oh, boy, am I glad to see you. The kidnappers are coming. But this time I'm

step ahead of them. And I locked their accomplice in the basement.

Is this a perfect plan or what?

It would be, dear, except for one thing.

Prescott is not their accomplice.

You're the inside man?

I'm afraid so.

Hey, Mom.

We're here.

Oh, yeah.

Mom?

He's your son?

I told you he was a handful.

Hey, get off of me!

Isn't there a trap door or something?

No.

Not much demand for one in a wine cellar.

good ideas?

Not a one.

I do have a cell phone, though.

Perfect, man.

Sure.

Hello, boss?

Kevin, is that you? Yeah, I'm calling from a cell phone.

Oh, a cell phone. Good for you, Pupit.

Is that another present she gave you? What a show -off.

I'll try again.

Buzz, before you hang up, I need to tell you something. I need to talk to Mom.

Okay, you tell me.

I'll try again later.

Why do you think I was the inside man?

Well, if you hadn't acted so strange, I wouldn't have thought you were so

strange.

And what were you the first time these guys broke in? Why didn't you answer the

intercom? Why did you shut off the cameras?

I didn't. But if those thugs were using Molly's remote, they could have turned

off the whole security system. But why did you say I was lying?

Because I thought you were.

Besides, I didn't want Miss Natalie to know that I'd been...

Napping on the job.

That woman, if she could work me 24 hours a day, she would. It's downright

inhuman. So whenever she's not here, I, um... You take advantage.

I take a break.

A nice, well -deserved break.

And with all the cameras and intercoms turned off, I didn't notice anything, so

I... You were covering your... Precisely.

You want to try calling your mom again?

Sure.

It's probably because I'm locked in a wine cellar. No, honey, I can't hear

There's too much static.

Calvin resident.

Hi, this is Kate McAllister, Kevin's mom. May I speak to him, please?

Kevin's not here right now.

That's strange.

He just called.

Really?

Well, he's out with his father and Miss Natalie.

Oh. Oh, he must have called from his dad's cell phone. Well, that explains

line going dead.

Little rascal called his mother.

You want me to go show him who's boss?

Sit down, Marv. You're not the boss. I'm the boss.

Okay.

Your cell phone is dead.

I don't think you'll be any more trouble.

Hello? Peter, it's me. I'm calling Kevin back. We got disconnected?

Kevin? Kevin's not with me. He's back at Natalie's house.

Really? I was just told he's with you.

Well, don't worry, Kate. I mean, I'm sure everything's fine.

Okay.

Wow, that's weird.

Someone told Kate that Kevin's with us.

Hmm.

Maybe I better go back and check on him. No, that's exactly what I want.

Peter, he's manipulating you.

Can't you see the pattern? Every time we leave the house, he pulls something.

He's just trying to get your attention and sabotage me.

Hello? Anybody out there?

Hello?

There's got to be something that we can do to get out of here.

Help me move these boxes.

Okay.

But what's back there?

That's probably not a dumb question.

That's weird.

Bingo. Let's hope it still works.

I'm sorry I misjudged you, Mr. Prescott.

Likewise.

Oh, and I'll forget about Natalie's reaction when she came home and told you

enter the house.

I do love watching her hyperventilate.

It's one of the few pleasures of this job.

If you hate this job, why don't you quit?

Jobs aren't that easy to come by.

Besides, I could end up working for someone far worse.

You shouldn't stay someplace you hate just because you're scared.

Life's too short.

All right.

Voila.

Let's see if you pay.

You just take care of yourself, you hear?

I'm telling you, I... Stay

very alert here, Vera.

I tell you what, why don't you go down, check out the wine cellar. Yes, sir.

You go get the Royals.

I'm going to go back and check on Kevin.

What, now?

Yeah, something's up. I can sense it.

Maybe you have to be a parent.

That's not fair.

You know how much I care about kids.

How much do you care about my kid?

Taxi!

Mom, do you think you can slow down a little bit?

Kevin's probably fine.

You just keep an eye out for cops, okay?

All right, Merritt. Go check out the living room. See if he's in there, all

right? I can't believe this.

I should have gone to college.

Two years. I could have been a dental technician.

Two years.

Mom! He's in the bedroom!

Mom? Get him!

Hey, I'm just... I'm just trying to... Shut up, you moron.

Hey, I'm no moron, you jerk. Shut up, you bag.

Door open.

What's wrong with you? What's wrong with you? I'm no bag. And you know what? You

ain't no genius.

Vera, honey. No, don't Vera, honey me.

You're not even as smart as this kid, who, in case you hadn't noticed, is

totally kicking our butts.

Well, from now on, I am my own butt.

here in a few minutes.

Get a load of that.

Holy majority.

Come on, Vera.

All right, come on out, kid.

All right.

Open bar.

Open bookshelf. Open book bar.

Open book bar shelf. Open book bar thing.

Open sesame.

That's stupid. Whoa.

Stupid mouth. Hey, come on. Just get off me, all right? I'm going to take care

of everything.

Bar?

Revolve sesame.

Bar, stop.

Oh! I know it's going faster.

Getting faster sesame.

Faster sesame.

Merry Christmas to all, and to all a good night. Good night.

Mr.

Prescott!

At your service.

Boy, am I glad to see you.

Perhaps we should call the police.

Good idea, Mr.

Prescott. Just Prescott to you.

I thought you said you weren't worried. I don't know. I just had a feeling.

Kevin!

Dad!

Mom!

Mom? Who are they?

Uh -oh.

Let's get out of here.

Hold on. Let's go.

I'm so sorry I didn't believe you.

The police have been summoned.

I've got lots of fun planned for your stay.

Can we go to Wrigley Field and the aquarium?

Do you have any kids?

No.

But I promise we'll have a very exciting time.

You'll get Salisbury thick. Yeah, I know about prison. That's where I met you.

Calm down. Calm down. You calm down.

Women, eh? Yeah. Hey, don't touch me.

Peter, what's he done now?

Well, they saved the day, that's what.

You should be thanking him.

Molly, what in the world is going on? It seems they were going to kidnap the

prince. Best we can gather, she's the boss.

She's my maid.

I'm her boss.

Well, looks like you're going to have to find a new mate.

And a new butler, I'm afraid.

I resign.

Resign?

But why?

Because, as a wise young man once said, life's too short.

Peter, do something.

All right, you're good.

I think I mistook infatuation and excitement for love. Look, this is your

It's not mine.

The whole time I was here, all I did was miss my family.

I'm in love with my wife and kids.

And I belong with them.

And I want to come home.

I mean, I understand if you need time to think about it.

I love you. I love you.

Young man, how are we ever going to show you our gratitude?

Would your family like to spend Christmas with our family? That sounds

Is that okay?

Yes.

You're going to be with them?

Today?

Music on.

No fall.