Original subtitles

Who have we got today?

A staff from the ladies' and gentlemen's department.

Can you get the men in and they can undress behind there as usual?

I'm afraid the dressing gowns haven't come back from the laundry yet. I'm

that way. I'll see what's happened.

Come in, please.

Thank you.

Where's the doctor?

She'll be back in a jiffy.

There's a cupboard there. Take your clothes off. Oh, I'll go first.

Mr Goldberg, you're supposed to put your clothes in the cupboard, not yourself.

Why can't one dress in the open?

I didn't do that in front of Mrs Goldberg until we were married 25 years.

What did she say?

She said... Isn't it funny what things you see when you haven't got the gun?

If you're shy, you can go behind the screen.

We're shy.

When I was in the army, we had to strip off in the barracks all the time.

I expect that's where the expression came from, barrack naked.

My brother goes to one of those nudist colonies.

Nobody's allowed to wear a stitch except the chef.

And he wears a metal apron for when he's chopping parsley.

Right, now, just take all your clothes and put them in the cupboard.

Wait a minute.

Face the other way.

I'm not turning to face the other way.

Hurry up, hurry up. The nurse will be back in a minute.

Where's she gone?

She's gone to get us some hangers.

for the time of year.

I wish that nurse would hurry up with the dressing gowns.

Well, if you're embarrassed, we'll talk about something totally unconnected with

our present situation.

Yeah. The sooner the better.

Mrs.

Goldberg is cooking a hot pot for supper tonight.

That's very interesting.

Yes, well, I mentioned it because I promised to buy the vegetables in the

department.

What are you getting?

Frozen sprouts.

Two out of ten.

Is this where we see the doctor?

Yes, but she's not here yet.

I'm sure there are not supposed to be two sexes in the same room at once.

Why not? There were two sexes in the room before we come in.

at Marbridge, Captain Peacock.

Fine, Mr.

Disadvanted. She hasn't looked behind the screen yet.

Shall we have a tea?

Well, we're not likely to get another not -for -few -to -tea.

Keep away, Mrs. Rupert. Do you hear what he said? Keep away, that's an order!

Ah! You're all talk when you've got your trousers on, but now you're losing your

bottle.

Captain Peacock, I have less to lose than most of you, but I don't think we

should stand here and be insulted.

I quite agree, Mr. Harbridge. Right.

Squad, left, turn.

Left wheel, double, march.

Here's the medical report for the ladies' and gents' department, sir.

all be up in a moment to know the results.

Oh, and Mr Harmon will be there as well.

What's he want?

Well, he's got the report on your office furniture.

And you do have some lovely antiques there, don't you, sir? What do you mean,

antiques? They were all new when I first came here.

Is everybody here?

Right, line up in order of seniority.

Would you mind waiting out here? Mr Grace will see you in a moment or two.

Oh, shut up.

Thank you.