Would you like to inspect the original subtitles? These are the user uploaded subtitles that are being translated:
1
00:00:03,220 --> 00:00:05,179
Mr. Nick Kingston-Persons?
2
00:00:05,222 --> 00:00:06,658
Yeah? Can we come in?
3
00:00:07,224 --> 00:00:08,312
Sure. Come on in.
4
00:00:09,879 --> 00:00:12,664
Oh. Whoa. Wha... What is this?
5
00:00:12,708 --> 00:00:14,318
Hi, Nick. I'm Karen.
6
00:00:14,362 --> 00:00:16,929
And you have been
selected to compete
7
00:00:16,973 --> 00:00:18,496
in Hand on a House!
8
00:00:20,933 --> 00:00:23,284
Uh, what is Hand on a House?
9
00:00:23,327 --> 00:00:25,068
Wait, you guys
are from Hand on a House?
10
00:00:25,112 --> 00:00:26,417
Yes, we are.
11
00:00:26,461 --> 00:00:27,549
Whoo!
12
00:00:27,592 --> 00:00:29,725
That's what we want to see.
13
00:00:29,768 --> 00:00:32,554
Okay, wait, wait.
What is Hand on a House?
14
00:00:32,597 --> 00:00:34,817
It's this contest they do where
they give away a new house
15
00:00:34,860 --> 00:00:36,688
to whoever can keep their
hand on it the longest.
16
00:00:36,732 --> 00:00:39,517
And you could win. Whoo!
17
00:00:40,388 --> 00:00:41,867
Whoo-hoo.
18
00:00:41,911 --> 00:00:43,217
Yeah, Dad. We signed you up.
19
00:00:43,260 --> 00:00:45,088
They only pick, like, 30
people. This is awesome.
20
00:00:45,132 --> 00:00:46,176
We're gonna win a free house.
21
00:00:46,220 --> 00:00:47,438
Whoo!
22
00:00:47,482 --> 00:00:49,353
Okay, hey, hey.
Whoa, oh, oh, oh.
23
00:00:49,397 --> 00:00:51,138
Let's back up.
Back it up, all right?
24
00:00:51,181 --> 00:00:52,661
Look, look, what is the catch?
25
00:00:52,704 --> 00:00:54,663
All right, 'cause I know
you're not giving away houses
26
00:00:54,706 --> 00:00:56,360
just because you can
put your hand on them.
27
00:00:56,404 --> 00:00:57,840
Yes, we are.
28
00:00:59,537 --> 00:01:00,582
Really?
29
00:01:00,625 --> 00:01:01,974
Yes, we are.
30
00:01:02,018 --> 00:01:03,019
Hey, hey, hey.
31
00:01:04,151 --> 00:01:05,804
Really? Really.
32
00:01:08,459 --> 00:01:11,245
Right. Thanks, but no, thanks.
33
00:01:11,288 --> 00:01:13,247
But, Dad. Sir.
34
00:01:13,290 --> 00:01:16,641
No one has ever turned down
the chance to win a free house.
35
00:01:19,340 --> 00:01:21,037
Whatever, okay?
36
00:01:21,081 --> 00:01:22,995
Listen, all I know is,
37
00:01:23,039 --> 00:01:26,129
if they were giving away free
houses, I would've heard about it.
38
00:01:26,173 --> 00:01:28,218
You're hearing about it now.
39
00:01:28,262 --> 00:01:31,265
Guys, I know a scam
when I see one.
40
00:01:31,308 --> 00:01:33,397
Sir, Nick,
41
00:01:33,441 --> 00:01:35,530
I can understand
your hesitation,
42
00:01:35,573 --> 00:01:37,836
but I assure you, this is real.
43
00:01:37,880 --> 00:01:40,012
And the competition
isn't until next weekend.
44
00:01:40,056 --> 00:01:42,145
So, why don't you
take a day or two,
45
00:01:42,189 --> 00:01:44,365
check us out and then decide?
46
00:01:44,408 --> 00:01:46,410
Dad, please? Come on, it's a free house.
47
00:01:46,454 --> 00:01:47,585
I know. It'd be so cool.
48
00:01:49,631 --> 00:01:50,806
Fine. I'll think about it.
49
00:01:50,849 --> 00:01:51,894
Yes!
50
00:01:51,937 --> 00:01:53,809
Dude! Just...
51
00:01:53,852 --> 00:01:56,986
Great. Now, just in case
you do decide to do it,
52
00:01:57,029 --> 00:01:59,162
can we just re-film
our entrance?
53
00:01:59,206 --> 00:02:00,816
And this time,
can you act excited?
54
00:02:00,859 --> 00:02:02,644
Great. Back to one, people.
55
00:02:04,602 --> 00:02:06,126
♪ Are we there yet?
56
00:02:07,083 --> 00:02:10,173
♪ Tell me, tell me, tell me
57
00:02:10,217 --> 00:02:12,175
♪ Tell me, are we there yet?
58
00:02:12,219 --> 00:02:13,698
♪ Are we there yet?
59
00:02:15,178 --> 00:02:17,049
Come on, Dad.
You can't turn it down.
60
00:02:17,093 --> 00:02:18,355
And why not?
61
00:02:18,399 --> 00:02:20,270
Because it's a free house.
62
00:02:20,314 --> 00:02:22,925
Look, guys, I know
how this works, all right?
63
00:02:22,968 --> 00:02:24,144
You might win the house,
64
00:02:24,187 --> 00:02:25,754
but in order to get it,
65
00:02:25,797 --> 00:02:28,409
you have to buy two or
more houses of equal value.
66
00:02:28,452 --> 00:02:30,019
Or you might get the house,
67
00:02:30,062 --> 00:02:32,195
but first, you have to
purchase the land that it's on.
68
00:02:32,239 --> 00:02:33,892
Or you might win the house,
69
00:02:33,936 --> 00:02:36,068
but the house is in Montana.
70
00:02:36,112 --> 00:02:37,983
Now, I got to move to Montana.
71
00:02:38,027 --> 00:02:40,290
You guys want to live
in Montana? I don't.
72
00:02:40,334 --> 00:02:42,771
I don't know, honey.
It looks like the real deal.
73
00:02:42,814 --> 00:02:45,077
They get sponsored by a lot
of different companies,
74
00:02:45,121 --> 00:02:46,949
and the free publicity
pays for the house.
75
00:02:46,992 --> 00:02:48,385
Well, that's good for them.
76
00:02:48,429 --> 00:02:50,561
But I am not moving to Montana.
77
00:02:50,605 --> 00:02:52,346
Dad, it's a free house.
78
00:02:52,389 --> 00:02:54,478
Yeah, I mean, we could
have tons of parties.
79
00:02:54,522 --> 00:02:56,132
No, you can have parties.
80
00:02:56,176 --> 00:02:57,916
I'm not gonna have
time to party.
81
00:02:57,960 --> 00:03:01,093
I'll be too busy paying
for the upkeep of two houses.
82
00:03:01,137 --> 00:03:03,052
Okay, Dad, look. Think
about this, all right?
83
00:03:03,095 --> 00:03:05,228
We could have one house
for me and you
84
00:03:05,272 --> 00:03:06,838
and one house
for Mom and Lindsey.
85
00:03:06,882 --> 00:03:08,318
Doesn't that sound cool?
86
00:03:08,362 --> 00:03:09,841
That sounds like a divorce.
87
00:03:09,885 --> 00:03:11,539
Ooh, that does sound cool.
88
00:03:11,582 --> 00:03:14,803
Listen, what am I gonna
do with another house?
89
00:03:14,846 --> 00:03:16,848
What am I gonna do
with the one I have?
90
00:03:16,892 --> 00:03:19,764
Harbor fugitives. Make
it into an FBI safe house.
91
00:03:19,808 --> 00:03:21,940
Make it into a crack
house. Who cares, man?
92
00:03:21,984 --> 00:03:24,160
It's an extra house, and
it's free. Come on, now.
93
00:03:25,683 --> 00:03:26,728
I'm just saying.
94
00:03:30,297 --> 00:03:32,037
Are you kidding? It's a house.
95
00:03:32,081 --> 00:03:34,388
This is as close as you're ever
gonna come to winning the lotto.
96
00:03:34,431 --> 00:03:36,781
It's like your pot of gold
at the end of the rainbow.
97
00:03:36,825 --> 00:03:38,479
It's your 40 acres and a mule.
98
00:03:38,522 --> 00:03:41,177
But only better,
because it's a house.
99
00:03:41,221 --> 00:03:44,354
Wait, so I'm supposed to
just stand there like an idiot
100
00:03:44,398 --> 00:03:46,661
with my hand on a house,
hoping I win it?
101
00:03:46,704 --> 00:03:48,097
Yes.
102
00:03:48,140 --> 00:03:49,577
Think of it as Suzanne.
103
00:03:49,620 --> 00:03:50,665
How so?
104
00:03:50,708 --> 00:03:52,144
I see where you're
going with this.
105
00:03:52,188 --> 00:03:54,625
Imagine a bunch of guys
had their hands on Suzanne.
106
00:03:54,669 --> 00:03:55,757
Hey, man.
107
00:03:55,800 --> 00:03:57,324
Go with me on this.
108
00:03:57,367 --> 00:03:59,978
And the last man standing
gets to take her home.
109
00:04:00,022 --> 00:04:02,546
Are you telling me
you wouldn't be that guy?
110
00:04:02,590 --> 00:04:03,634
Yeah, I'd be that guy.
111
00:04:03,678 --> 00:04:05,636
See, well, then do this.
112
00:04:05,680 --> 00:04:08,857
This is better than
a wife. It's a house.
113
00:04:08,900 --> 00:04:11,599
And if you're not gonna do
it for yourself, do it for me.
114
00:04:11,642 --> 00:04:13,253
For you?
115
00:04:13,296 --> 00:04:16,299
Yes. Can you imagine what we
could do with a second house?
116
00:04:16,343 --> 00:04:18,519
Ooh, it could be our
Monday night football house.
117
00:04:18,562 --> 00:04:20,390
It could be our
Sunday night poker house.
118
00:04:20,434 --> 00:04:21,870
It can be my "Tuesday night,
119
00:04:21,913 --> 00:04:23,654
"my wife is mad at me, can I
stay at your house?" house.
120
00:04:23,698 --> 00:04:25,439
It could be my "Saturday night
121
00:04:25,482 --> 00:04:27,702
"I don't want this girl to know
where my real house is" house.
122
00:04:27,745 --> 00:04:29,443
Oh, so on Sunday night,
123
00:04:29,486 --> 00:04:31,009
she comes back looking for you,
124
00:04:31,053 --> 00:04:32,228
finds out you don't live there,
125
00:04:32,272 --> 00:04:34,361
and then burns the house down.
126
00:04:34,404 --> 00:04:36,754
I'd put a bag over
her head, like a rendition.
127
00:04:38,626 --> 00:04:40,802
Okay, look. Everybody's
acting like I already won.
128
00:04:40,845 --> 00:04:42,151
What if I don't win it?
129
00:04:42,194 --> 00:04:43,674
Then it's just
a big waste of time.
130
00:04:44,806 --> 00:04:45,807
Or...
131
00:04:46,895 --> 00:04:48,549
Or what?
132
00:04:48,592 --> 00:04:50,464
You could win a free house.
133
00:04:54,381 --> 00:04:56,034
Nick, what do you mean
you're not gonna do it?
134
00:04:56,078 --> 00:04:57,775
It's a free house.
135
00:04:57,819 --> 00:04:59,516
You know the only other way
to get a free house?
136
00:04:59,560 --> 00:05:01,170
You got to marry a dude.
137
00:05:01,213 --> 00:05:02,345
Then you got to wait
a couple years.
138
00:05:02,389 --> 00:05:03,738
You got to live with him
and all that.
139
00:05:03,781 --> 00:05:06,001
Then you divorce him
and then you take the house.
140
00:05:06,044 --> 00:05:07,219
If you're not gonna
do it, I'll do it.
141
00:05:07,263 --> 00:05:08,612
Look, it doesn't work that way.
142
00:05:08,656 --> 00:05:10,310
You have to be selected.
143
00:05:10,353 --> 00:05:12,355
Eh, it's probably for the best.
144
00:05:12,399 --> 00:05:15,315
I mean, really,
who needs five houses?
145
00:05:15,358 --> 00:05:16,707
You have four houses?
146
00:05:16,751 --> 00:05:18,579
Yeah, something like that.
I don't know.
147
00:05:18,622 --> 00:05:20,711
Maybe, maybe four. I don't know.
148
00:05:20,755 --> 00:05:22,191
The ex took a couple of them.
149
00:05:22,234 --> 00:05:24,193
You don't know how
many houses you have,
150
00:05:24,236 --> 00:05:26,369
and you don't know how
many houses you've lost?
151
00:05:26,413 --> 00:05:27,544
How white are you?
152
00:05:27,588 --> 00:05:30,504
Ha! It ain't white. It's rich.
153
00:05:30,547 --> 00:05:33,071
I know in my heart of hearts
154
00:05:33,115 --> 00:05:36,031
that Russell Simmons
has the same problem.
155
00:05:36,074 --> 00:05:37,380
Nick, you have to do this.
156
00:05:37,424 --> 00:05:38,903
Even if you don't win,
157
00:05:38,947 --> 00:05:40,905
you're gonna get
some great publicity. That's right.
158
00:05:40,949 --> 00:05:42,298
You're gonna get more famous.
159
00:05:42,342 --> 00:05:44,169
You're gonna make more money.
160
00:05:44,213 --> 00:05:46,433
You'll buy another house.
Same difference.
161
00:05:46,476 --> 00:05:50,393
Even if I wanted to, you
know, I just don't have time.
162
00:05:50,437 --> 00:05:52,526
I mean, this contest takes days.
163
00:05:52,569 --> 00:05:54,615
Nick, what do you
think sick days are for?
164
00:05:54,658 --> 00:05:55,703
For when you're sick.
165
00:05:56,443 --> 00:05:58,401
You're kidding, right?
166
00:05:58,445 --> 00:06:01,709
Nick, besides, do you know
what your wife's gonna do
167
00:06:01,752 --> 00:06:04,189
if you told her you had
a chance to win a free house
168
00:06:04,233 --> 00:06:06,496
and you didn't take it? No, what?
169
00:06:06,540 --> 00:06:08,106
Nick, she's gonna divorce you.
170
00:06:08,150 --> 00:06:09,978
Then she's gonna take the house.
171
00:06:10,021 --> 00:06:12,981
Then you go from having
two houses to no houses.
172
00:06:13,024 --> 00:06:15,636
All right. All right.
Fine. Fine.
173
00:06:15,679 --> 00:06:17,289
I'll do it, if for nothing else,
174
00:06:17,333 --> 00:06:18,813
to get everybody off my back.
175
00:06:18,856 --> 00:06:21,163
Or you could win a free
house. What don't you get?
176
00:06:21,206 --> 00:06:22,730
Right, Jennifer? Yeah.
177
00:06:22,773 --> 00:06:24,384
It's free, Nick. JENNIFER: Free.
178
00:06:24,427 --> 00:06:26,168
Something for nothing.
It don't get better than that.
179
00:06:29,737 --> 00:06:30,868
Action.
180
00:06:32,304 --> 00:06:34,437
The best part about
this competition is,
181
00:06:34,481 --> 00:06:36,396
if I win, I'll get a house,
182
00:06:36,439 --> 00:06:38,876
and I'll never, ever date
a guy with an apartment again,
183
00:06:38,920 --> 00:06:41,270
unless it's a penthouse
in a major city, not Detroit.
184
00:06:41,313 --> 00:06:43,925
Raising the stakes, people.
Raising the stakes.
185
00:06:43,968 --> 00:06:45,970
Okay, so this
is for a documentary?
186
00:06:46,014 --> 00:06:47,189
Yeah, we're trying
to sell it on TV.
187
00:06:47,232 --> 00:06:48,756
Ooh, that's good.
That's very good.
188
00:06:48,799 --> 00:06:50,018
Uh, Gigi? Yeah.
189
00:06:50,061 --> 00:06:51,715
What's wrong with a guy
with an apartment?
190
00:06:51,759 --> 00:06:53,413
I had an apartment
when I met Suzanne.
191
00:06:53,456 --> 00:06:55,284
And now you have a house,
don't you, Nick?
192
00:06:55,327 --> 00:06:57,025
I mean, come on. Just, look,
193
00:06:57,068 --> 00:06:59,462
if I married a guy
with an apartment
194
00:06:59,506 --> 00:07:01,203
and I divorced him,
which I would,
195
00:07:01,246 --> 00:07:02,509
because he has an apartment,
196
00:07:02,552 --> 00:07:03,901
what am I left with, Nick?
197
00:07:03,945 --> 00:07:06,121
An apartment.
198
00:07:06,164 --> 00:07:09,820
I cannot believe you and Gigi
both got picked to be in this contest.
199
00:07:09,864 --> 00:07:11,431
I know, right?
What are the odds?
200
00:07:11,474 --> 00:07:13,128
Zero. I used... No.
201
00:07:13,171 --> 00:07:15,696
I used to date the guy
who put together the list.
202
00:07:16,653 --> 00:07:18,568
He owed me a favor.
203
00:07:18,612 --> 00:07:21,528
Wait, wait, wait, wait. What kind
of favor is worth a free house?
204
00:07:23,834 --> 00:07:25,270
So innocent.
205
00:07:28,535 --> 00:07:30,972
Hey, Ma, you came
to cheer me on.
206
00:07:31,015 --> 00:07:34,236
Cheer you on? No, baby. I
came here to take you out.
207
00:07:34,279 --> 00:07:35,890
I need to win this house for me.
208
00:07:35,933 --> 00:07:37,674
How did you get in this contest?
209
00:07:37,718 --> 00:07:39,807
Just a couple days ago,
you didn't even know about it.
210
00:07:39,850 --> 00:07:42,374
Oh, I used to play poker
with some guys
211
00:07:42,418 --> 00:07:44,638
from the real estate office
who sponsor this thing.
212
00:07:44,681 --> 00:07:46,857
It was his way of getting
me back what he owes me.
213
00:07:49,381 --> 00:07:50,687
You guys are in this, too?
214
00:07:50,731 --> 00:07:52,602
That's right, baby.
You know what?
215
00:07:52,646 --> 00:07:56,084
You could just go home right
now. I'm winning this house.
216
00:07:56,127 --> 00:07:58,129
I don't mean
to be disrespectful,
217
00:07:58,173 --> 00:08:01,742
but you have a better chance of
growing to be 5'6" than winning this house.
218
00:08:01,785 --> 00:08:03,657
I'm already 5'6".
219
00:08:03,700 --> 00:08:06,834
Oh. Well, at my height,
everything sounds tall.
220
00:08:07,878 --> 00:08:09,314
How'd you get in this?
221
00:08:09,358 --> 00:08:11,665
My uncle bribed somebody.
222
00:08:11,708 --> 00:08:15,582
And by "bribed somebody,"
I mean "gave them money."
223
00:08:15,625 --> 00:08:18,846
Troy, aren't you a little young
to be in this contest, man?
224
00:08:18,889 --> 00:08:20,500
Actually, Mr. Kingston-Persons,
225
00:08:20,543 --> 00:08:22,763
a kid could totally
be in this contest.
226
00:08:22,806 --> 00:08:25,374
They just have to have their
parents sign a consent form.
227
00:08:26,418 --> 00:08:27,594
Kevin, Lindsey.
228
00:08:29,596 --> 00:08:32,555
Why aren't you guys in
this contest instead of me?
229
00:08:34,601 --> 00:08:36,385
Are you crazy?
230
00:08:36,428 --> 00:08:38,343
I mean, seriously, who wants to
be around a bunch of smelly people
231
00:08:38,387 --> 00:08:40,128
with their hand
on a wall for two days?
232
00:08:45,133 --> 00:08:46,134
Ooh.
233
00:08:47,788 --> 00:08:48,963
Who's that?
234
00:08:50,486 --> 00:08:52,575
That's Luke Bonnie.
235
00:08:52,619 --> 00:08:54,795
Uh-oh. "Uh-oh" what?
236
00:08:54,838 --> 00:08:57,580
I read about him when I was
doing research for the contest.
237
00:08:57,624 --> 00:09:00,235
He has won every
hand-on-something competition
238
00:09:00,278 --> 00:09:02,411
they've had
for four years running.
239
00:09:02,454 --> 00:09:04,761
Yeah. He's won Hand on a Horse,
240
00:09:04,805 --> 00:09:06,110
Hand on a Helicopter,
241
00:09:06,154 --> 00:09:08,025
Hand on a Holiday,
and Hand on a Ham.
242
00:09:09,418 --> 00:09:10,724
How does he win so much?
243
00:09:10,767 --> 00:09:11,986
He has a prosthetic arm,
244
00:09:12,029 --> 00:09:14,597
so he can go on for days.
245
00:09:14,641 --> 00:09:18,470
In fact, he won it in a competition
called Stump on an Arm.
246
00:09:18,514 --> 00:09:20,647
Well, how are we supposed
to compete against that?
247
00:09:21,561 --> 00:09:23,563
You're not.
248
00:09:23,606 --> 00:09:26,740
And, by the way, I do hope you wiped
your feet good before you came in here.
249
00:09:26,783 --> 00:09:29,133
I don't need you tracking
no mud in my new house.
250
00:09:29,177 --> 00:09:30,613
He did not go there, did he?
251
00:09:30,657 --> 00:09:33,050
Whoa, whoa, man. No, no,
these 14s are clean, player.
252
00:09:33,094 --> 00:09:34,138
I don't know what
you're talking about.
253
00:09:34,182 --> 00:09:36,227
Okay, everyone... Oh, Luke!
254
00:09:36,271 --> 00:09:37,620
Oh, my goodness. You're here.
255
00:09:37,664 --> 00:09:38,969
Annie. What an honor.
256
00:09:39,013 --> 00:09:40,536
So good to see you.
257
00:09:40,580 --> 00:09:43,017
My goodness.
This is so wonderful.
258
00:09:43,060 --> 00:09:47,891
Okay, anyway, it's almost time
for the contest to begin.
259
00:09:47,935 --> 00:09:52,243
So, everyone take a spot
near the wall, all right?
260
00:09:52,287 --> 00:09:55,769
Okay, now, here are the rules:
261
00:09:55,812 --> 00:10:00,164
Everyone put a hand on a
part of the wall in the house,
262
00:10:00,208 --> 00:10:02,340
any part, okay.
263
00:10:02,384 --> 00:10:03,385
No sitting.
264
00:10:04,168 --> 00:10:05,605
Now, if at any moment,
265
00:10:05,648 --> 00:10:08,520
your hand loses
touch with the wall,
266
00:10:08,564 --> 00:10:10,174
you're out of the competition.
267
00:10:10,218 --> 00:10:11,741
We're gonna take
a 15-minute break
268
00:10:11,785 --> 00:10:14,004
in groups every six hours.
269
00:10:14,048 --> 00:10:15,310
Does everyone understand?
270
00:10:15,353 --> 00:10:16,398
Yeah, yeah. NICK: Yeah.
271
00:10:16,441 --> 00:10:17,921
Y'all might as well quit.
272
00:10:17,965 --> 00:10:19,270
What's that supposed to mean?
273
00:10:19,314 --> 00:10:21,925
Listen, don't mind him.
274
00:10:21,969 --> 00:10:23,579
He's just trying to
psych you out. Relax.
275
00:10:23,623 --> 00:10:26,930
I'm not relaxing, Nick.
I'm winning. I'm winning.
276
00:10:26,974 --> 00:10:29,890
So, let's get this
party started, Annie.
277
00:10:29,933 --> 00:10:34,764
All right, it's gonna be Hands
on a House in three, two, one.
278
00:10:36,113 --> 00:10:39,726
Whoo! You're all
going down, suckers! Ha-ha!
279
00:10:39,769 --> 00:10:41,728
Hello?
280
00:10:43,033 --> 00:10:45,296
And you're out. I can't hear.
281
00:10:45,340 --> 00:10:47,777
What? I just lost a house
because of you. What is it?
282
00:10:51,302 --> 00:10:53,174
So...
283
00:10:53,217 --> 00:10:55,872
I hear you've won a bunch
of these competitions.
284
00:10:56,743 --> 00:10:57,700
You heard right.
285
00:10:58,962 --> 00:11:00,703
And just so you know,
286
00:11:00,747 --> 00:11:02,096
I'm gonna win this one, too.
287
00:11:03,097 --> 00:11:04,925
Sorry.
288
00:11:04,968 --> 00:11:08,537
I don't need your "sorry," okay?
289
00:11:08,580 --> 00:11:10,452
All right, you're gonna need it.
290
00:11:10,495 --> 00:11:14,978
Sure. And I don't have
to do it with some fake hand.
291
00:11:15,022 --> 00:11:18,025
It's not a fake hand.
It's prosthetic.
292
00:11:18,068 --> 00:11:19,940
What's the difference, man?
293
00:11:19,983 --> 00:11:22,943
A fake hand can't do the
things this hand can do.
294
00:11:22,986 --> 00:11:24,640
This thing's like a super hand.
295
00:11:25,859 --> 00:11:27,121
As a matter of fact,
296
00:11:27,164 --> 00:11:30,037
my prosthetic arm
has done way more
297
00:11:30,080 --> 00:11:32,953
than my other arm has
ever done in my whole life.
298
00:11:32,996 --> 00:11:35,695
And I thank it every day.
299
00:11:35,738 --> 00:11:39,437
And I'm gonna thank it again
after I win this house.
300
00:11:39,481 --> 00:11:40,961
How'd you lose
that hand, anyway?
301
00:11:41,396 --> 00:11:42,876
Pit bull.
302
00:11:42,919 --> 00:11:45,792
A pit bull bit off
your whole arm?
303
00:11:45,835 --> 00:11:46,880
Just the hand.
304
00:11:46,923 --> 00:11:48,620
Pit bull clamped down on it.
305
00:11:48,664 --> 00:11:51,406
Two hundred and fifty pounds
of pressure per square inch.
306
00:11:51,449 --> 00:11:54,714
Had to cut it off. But I
learned something that day.
307
00:11:54,757 --> 00:11:58,108
Mmm. I didn't know pit
bull bites were that serious.
308
00:11:58,152 --> 00:11:59,762
They're not.
309
00:11:59,806 --> 00:12:01,198
That's what I learned.
310
00:12:01,242 --> 00:12:02,634
If I would've just stayed calm
311
00:12:02,678 --> 00:12:05,246
and quit yanking on it,
it would've let go.
312
00:12:05,289 --> 00:12:07,465
Instead, cut my
hand off for nothing.
313
00:12:08,423 --> 00:12:10,642
Well, so that's the hand, man.
314
00:12:10,686 --> 00:12:12,819
I mean, what happened
to the rest of your arm?
315
00:12:12,862 --> 00:12:15,865
About a month later,
working on a ventilation duct,
316
00:12:15,909 --> 00:12:18,476
got my forearm stuck in there
317
00:12:18,520 --> 00:12:19,564
and had to cut it off.
318
00:12:19,608 --> 00:12:22,176
I learned something
then, too, though.
319
00:12:22,219 --> 00:12:25,440
Oh, don't tell me
your forearm wasn't stuck.
320
00:12:25,483 --> 00:12:27,834
Oh, it was stuck,
just not this one.
321
00:12:27,877 --> 00:12:29,531
It was my other arm.
322
00:12:29,574 --> 00:12:31,141
But what I learned was,
323
00:12:31,185 --> 00:12:32,664
stay calm in emergencies.
324
00:12:33,535 --> 00:12:35,667
Well, that explains the arm
325
00:12:35,711 --> 00:12:37,060
from the shoulder to the elbow,
326
00:12:37,104 --> 00:12:38,758
but what about the rest?
327
00:12:38,801 --> 00:12:40,411
About a month and a half
after that,
328
00:12:40,455 --> 00:12:42,892
I was out in the forest,
chopping down some wood.
329
00:12:42,936 --> 00:12:44,415
A big tree fell on it.
330
00:12:44,459 --> 00:12:46,156
And you cut it off?
331
00:12:46,200 --> 00:12:48,811
No, it actually came
right out of there.
332
00:12:48,855 --> 00:12:51,074
It was just nudged
in there a little bit.
333
00:12:51,118 --> 00:12:53,468
But then this big bear
came up on me.
334
00:12:53,511 --> 00:12:55,252
I was standing there going,
335
00:12:55,296 --> 00:12:59,387
"Stay calm. Don't
panic. Don't run."
336
00:13:00,605 --> 00:13:02,956
I did the wrong thing.
I should've run.
337
00:13:05,523 --> 00:13:10,137
Well, as good as you've
been doing in these contests,
338
00:13:10,180 --> 00:13:11,965
looks like all you
need is one arm.
339
00:13:12,008 --> 00:13:13,314
That's a good one.
340
00:13:13,357 --> 00:13:16,143
I have two arms. One
of them's prosthetic.
341
00:13:18,362 --> 00:13:21,322
Well, how many houses have
you won with that thing, anyway?
342
00:13:21,365 --> 00:13:23,193
Well, thank you for
calling my arm a thing.
343
00:13:23,237 --> 00:13:26,501
And it's seven,
not counting this one.
344
00:13:26,544 --> 00:13:29,765
Wait, wait. Well, what are you
gonna do with another house, man?
345
00:13:29,809 --> 00:13:31,811
I mean, why don't you give
somebody else a chance?
346
00:13:31,854 --> 00:13:33,160
That's easy for you to say.
347
00:13:33,203 --> 00:13:34,770
Why don't you let a bear
eat your arm off,
348
00:13:34,814 --> 00:13:36,206
and then you tell
me why I don't.
349
00:13:39,296 --> 00:13:40,994
Are you feeling run-down at all?
350
00:13:41,037 --> 00:13:42,386
Run-down?
351
00:13:42,430 --> 00:13:44,388
Just because I've been
standing here for 12 hours
352
00:13:44,432 --> 00:13:47,261
with my hand on a wall
with no food, no water,
353
00:13:47,304 --> 00:13:48,784
not being able to go
to the bathroom,
354
00:13:48,828 --> 00:13:50,873
a crook in my neck, a sore back,
355
00:13:50,917 --> 00:13:53,136
tendinitis in my knee
and blisters on my feet?
356
00:13:53,180 --> 00:13:54,529
Hell, yeah, I'm run-down.
357
00:13:54,572 --> 00:13:55,922
Girl, give me that ice pack.
358
00:13:55,965 --> 00:13:57,401
Here you go.
359
00:13:58,228 --> 00:13:59,490
Get out of my face, boy.
360
00:14:00,752 --> 00:14:02,145
Okay, everyone,
361
00:14:02,189 --> 00:14:04,669
we're approaching our
12th-hour 15-minute break
362
00:14:04,713 --> 00:14:06,758
in three, two, one.
363
00:14:07,934 --> 00:14:08,935
Move your hands.
364
00:14:10,719 --> 00:14:12,895
I can barely feel my arm.
365
00:14:12,939 --> 00:14:15,332
The last time I felt my arm,
a bear had it in his mouth.
366
00:14:18,988 --> 00:14:20,598
This is harder than I thought.
367
00:14:20,642 --> 00:14:21,991
Tell me about it.
368
00:14:22,035 --> 00:14:24,602
I'd take being tied up in
a trunk over this any day.
369
00:14:26,343 --> 00:14:27,605
Well, I'll tell you what.
370
00:14:27,649 --> 00:14:29,259
Some of these people are nasty.
371
00:14:29,303 --> 00:14:31,087
I mean, you'd think if you
knew you were gonna be
372
00:14:31,131 --> 00:14:33,263
standing around with your
arm up for who knows how long,
373
00:14:33,307 --> 00:14:34,917
you'd wash under it.
374
00:14:34,961 --> 00:14:36,876
You sure it's not just a tactic?
375
00:14:36,919 --> 00:14:41,141
Well, if the woman didn't smell
like funk uncut, I'd say yeah.
376
00:14:41,184 --> 00:14:42,707
All right, everybody,
377
00:14:42,751 --> 00:14:44,274
I've got some refreshments,
378
00:14:44,318 --> 00:14:46,711
got some pick-me-ups,
and of course,
379
00:14:46,755 --> 00:14:48,800
a nice fresh change of clothing.
380
00:14:48,844 --> 00:14:51,412
Ooh, thank goodness.
Let me have that.
381
00:14:51,455 --> 00:14:54,067
My shirt is covered
with secondhand funk.
382
00:14:54,110 --> 00:14:55,372
Here, buddy, put this on.
383
00:14:55,416 --> 00:14:57,200
No, thanks. It's not my style.
384
00:14:57,244 --> 00:14:59,072
You have a style? Yeah.
385
00:14:59,115 --> 00:15:00,290
Put the shirt on.
386
00:15:00,334 --> 00:15:02,423
Those are women's clothes.
387
00:15:02,466 --> 00:15:04,729
What are you talking about? What would
make you think this is a woman's shirt?
388
00:15:04,773 --> 00:15:06,079
It's fashion forward, Nick.
389
00:15:06,122 --> 00:15:08,908
Yeah, if, in the future,
everyone's wearing pink.
390
00:15:08,951 --> 00:15:11,127
Come on, man. It's
a shirt. And after all,
391
00:15:11,171 --> 00:15:13,564
pink is the new... Pink.
392
00:15:13,608 --> 00:15:15,175
Come on, man.
If you win this house
393
00:15:15,218 --> 00:15:17,481
and you're wearing this
shirt, it's like a win-win.
394
00:15:17,525 --> 00:15:18,961
No, it's more like a win-lose,
395
00:15:19,005 --> 00:15:20,876
because you win the house
but you lose self-respect
396
00:15:20,920 --> 00:15:22,573
because you're wearing
women's clothes.
397
00:15:23,487 --> 00:15:25,272
Oh, hey, Martin.
398
00:15:25,315 --> 00:15:26,926
Gigi, would you put on this shirt?
I'm looking for some free publicity.
399
00:15:26,969 --> 00:15:28,057
Sure.
400
00:15:28,101 --> 00:15:29,189
Thank you.
401
00:15:29,232 --> 00:15:31,408
But I'll need
free drinks for a month.
402
00:15:31,452 --> 00:15:32,844
You're serious?
403
00:15:32,888 --> 00:15:35,978
You do want me
to wear this T-shirt, right?
404
00:15:36,022 --> 00:15:38,633
Fine. Bottom shelf,
just like your outfit.
405
00:15:43,986 --> 00:15:45,553
Hey, guys.
406
00:15:45,596 --> 00:15:47,990
You know, as much
as I want a free house,
407
00:15:48,034 --> 00:15:49,687
I don't know how much
longer I can keep this up.
408
00:15:49,731 --> 00:15:51,776
My arms feel like
they're gonna fall off.
409
00:15:51,820 --> 00:15:54,127
Come on, guys. We can do this.
410
00:15:54,170 --> 00:15:56,433
We can't let Luke win
this house, all right?
411
00:15:56,477 --> 00:15:57,957
Come on. Bring it in right here.
412
00:15:58,000 --> 00:16:01,177
Ah, ow. Ooh. Bring
it in. Bring it in.
413
00:16:01,221 --> 00:16:03,614
Come on. One, two, three.
414
00:16:07,401 --> 00:16:08,750
I'm winning this house.
415
00:16:13,885 --> 00:16:15,278
How you holding up there, hoss?
416
00:16:15,322 --> 00:16:18,151
Don't worry about me,
man. I'm fine.
417
00:16:19,239 --> 00:16:20,936
Believe me, I'm not
worried about you.
418
00:16:21,981 --> 00:16:23,721
Okay, people,
419
00:16:23,765 --> 00:16:25,941
we're approaching
our hour-30 break.
420
00:16:25,985 --> 00:16:29,727
So, everyone can remove
their hands in three, two, one.
421
00:16:31,512 --> 00:16:32,687
That's it. I'm done.
422
00:16:32,730 --> 00:16:35,559
Ma, don't go. We had
a pact. What's wrong?
423
00:16:35,603 --> 00:16:37,387
The woman
with the funky underarms,
424
00:16:37,431 --> 00:16:39,911
she had a big glass of milk
during the last break,
425
00:16:39,955 --> 00:16:41,870
and I was wondering why.
Then I found out.
426
00:16:41,913 --> 00:16:44,003
The woman is lactose intolerant.
427
00:16:44,046 --> 00:16:45,874
But, Ma, it's a free house.
428
00:16:45,917 --> 00:16:48,050
Well, good luck
getting the smell out.
429
00:16:48,094 --> 00:16:49,486
Ma, don't go.
430
00:16:49,530 --> 00:16:50,792
Let her go, son.
431
00:16:50,835 --> 00:16:52,794
That way, she won't
have to see you crying
432
00:16:52,837 --> 00:16:54,230
when I win this house.
433
00:16:56,928 --> 00:16:58,104
Get that thing away from me.
434
00:17:00,106 --> 00:17:03,718
Ugh, Nick, I'm slipping, man.
435
00:17:03,761 --> 00:17:06,460
No, Mike. Just a little
while longer, man.
436
00:17:06,503 --> 00:17:08,766
You're in pain, Mike. It hurts.
437
00:17:08,810 --> 00:17:10,377
No, it doesn't.Come on.
438
00:17:10,420 --> 00:17:12,161
It feels like your shoulder's
about to pop out the socket.
439
00:17:12,205 --> 00:17:15,643
It's easier that way.
Just let go of the wall.
440
00:17:15,686 --> 00:17:17,732
Nick, man, forget
about me, man. Don't you quit.
441
00:17:17,775 --> 00:17:19,995
Let go of the wall.
You'll be out of pain.
442
00:17:20,039 --> 00:17:21,170
No, you won't.MIKE: I got to hold on.
443
00:17:21,214 --> 00:17:22,824
Let's face it.
You're a natural born loser.
444
00:17:22,867 --> 00:17:24,565
Let go of the wall. Don't let go, man.
445
00:17:24,608 --> 00:17:25,653
Sorry, Nick.
446
00:17:25,696 --> 00:17:26,828
No!
447
00:17:26,871 --> 00:17:28,525
And you're out. You're next, buddy.
448
00:17:30,049 --> 00:17:31,137
Sorry, man.
449
00:17:33,052 --> 00:17:34,705
Okay, everyone,
450
00:17:34,749 --> 00:17:39,145
we're approaching our
36th-hour break in three, two, one.
451
00:17:42,235 --> 00:17:44,106
You'd better shake
that hand good, son,
452
00:17:44,150 --> 00:17:45,455
'cause you're going down next.
453
00:17:45,890 --> 00:17:47,675
Bring it.
454
00:17:47,718 --> 00:17:50,156
It's already brought.
Funny you should mention it.
455
00:17:53,115 --> 00:17:54,899
Uh, what are you doing?
456
00:17:54,943 --> 00:17:57,554
I'm about to play
my winning hand.
457
00:18:02,037 --> 00:18:03,908
We're down to the 42nd hour.
458
00:18:03,952 --> 00:18:05,823
Let's hear it
for the final contestants.
459
00:18:07,173 --> 00:18:08,522
Dude. Dude.
460
00:18:08,565 --> 00:18:09,740
You're out.
461
00:18:13,092 --> 00:18:14,876
Looks like it's just you and me.
462
00:18:14,919 --> 00:18:16,573
Looks like it is.
463
00:18:16,617 --> 00:18:19,054
Too bad you're gonna
disappoint your kids.
464
00:18:19,098 --> 00:18:20,838
Seems like they look up to you.
465
00:18:20,882 --> 00:18:22,144
They do.
466
00:18:22,188 --> 00:18:24,103
And you know
what's really a shame?
467
00:18:24,146 --> 00:18:26,627
That that arm
is gonna disappoint you.
468
00:18:27,410 --> 00:18:29,325
You had a good run.
469
00:18:29,369 --> 00:18:31,153
Too bad it's getting cut short.
470
00:18:31,197 --> 00:18:32,285
That supposed to be funny?
471
00:18:33,460 --> 00:18:35,201
Only if you think
losing is funny.
472
00:18:36,027 --> 00:18:37,551
You're getting weak, Nick.
473
00:18:37,594 --> 00:18:38,900
I can see it in your eyes.
474
00:18:38,943 --> 00:18:40,815
No, you don't see... Your arm is on fire.
475
00:18:40,858 --> 00:18:42,164
No, my... I just had...
476
00:18:42,208 --> 00:18:44,471
Come on, let's face reality.
Your arm is on fire.
477
00:18:44,514 --> 00:18:46,342
Your shoulder
is coming out the socket. No, I'm cool.
478
00:18:46,386 --> 00:18:48,823
And you're ready to quit. I'm cool as a cucumber.
479
00:18:48,866 --> 00:18:51,130
You know what?
Quitting, for you, is normal.
480
00:18:51,173 --> 00:18:53,175
You've quit everything
you've ever started in your life.
481
00:18:53,219 --> 00:18:55,090
I've... You don't know me, man.
482
00:18:55,134 --> 00:18:57,571
Do you know how much it costs
to heat a house like this, Nick?
483
00:18:57,614 --> 00:19:00,530
Do you know how hard you're gonna
have to work to pay the electric bill?
484
00:19:00,574 --> 00:19:02,576
How you gonna call me a quitter?
485
00:19:02,619 --> 00:19:04,926
You're gonna have to work the rest of
your life just to pay for the heating bill.
486
00:19:04,969 --> 00:19:08,147
Hey, man, this is my house.
I can pay the bills...
487
00:19:09,452 --> 00:19:11,280
Take your hand off the wall.
488
00:19:11,324 --> 00:19:14,065
The pain will go away.
You'll be fine.
489
00:19:14,109 --> 00:19:17,373
I'm not gonna be fine.
I'll be a loser if I do that.
490
00:19:17,417 --> 00:19:19,245
Lower and lower to the ground,
491
00:19:19,288 --> 00:19:20,594
which is natural for you, Nick.
492
00:19:20,637 --> 00:19:21,682
Go ahead and let go of it.
493
00:19:21,725 --> 00:19:23,249
I got no place else to go.
494
00:19:23,292 --> 00:19:24,554
Nick, go ahead. It's
burning. You're on fire, Nick.
495
00:19:24,598 --> 00:19:26,426
You're on fire, son.
496
00:19:26,469 --> 00:19:27,949
Go ahead and let go of it.
497
00:19:27,992 --> 00:19:30,125
Nick, you'll always
have second place.
498
00:19:30,169 --> 00:19:32,823
And it's gonna be
all over your shirt.
499
00:19:32,867 --> 00:19:34,303
You need to go ahead
and let it go, Nick.
500
00:19:34,347 --> 00:19:36,610
Come on down. Go on down.
501
00:19:36,653 --> 00:19:38,525
You fought a good fight.
You went the distance. I'm not gonna give up.
502
00:19:38,568 --> 00:19:39,917
Now, go ahead
and let it go, Nick.
503
00:19:39,961 --> 00:19:41,223
I'm never gonna let go.
504
00:19:41,267 --> 00:19:44,400
You're almost there.
You are halfway to hell.
505
00:19:44,444 --> 00:19:45,488
Let it go, Nick.
506
00:19:45,532 --> 00:19:46,881
It hurts. Nick, let it go.
507
00:19:46,924 --> 00:19:48,665
It's slipping away.
508
00:19:48,709 --> 00:19:49,753
Come on. Let go.
509
00:19:49,797 --> 00:19:50,885
I can't hold on.
510
00:19:50,928 --> 00:19:52,321
You got it, Nick. Let it go.
511
00:19:52,365 --> 00:19:53,453
Oh, God. Roll it down.
512
00:19:53,888 --> 00:19:54,976
Oh!
513
00:19:55,019 --> 00:19:56,107
Oh, man! You're out.
514
00:19:57,935 --> 00:19:59,633
Another hand, another house.
515
00:19:59,676 --> 00:20:02,636
Whoo-ee, doggies.
516
00:20:02,679 --> 00:20:05,682
And you're out.
517
00:20:05,726 --> 00:20:07,641
What are you talking about?
518
00:20:07,684 --> 00:20:09,382
I'm sorry, Luke.
519
00:20:10,557 --> 00:20:11,601
Troy?
520
00:20:14,604 --> 00:20:16,519
Is it over?
521
00:20:16,563 --> 00:20:20,044
You are the winner of this
year's Hand on a House!
522
00:20:21,002 --> 00:20:23,222
This is your house, now.
523
00:20:23,265 --> 00:20:24,397
Cool.
524
00:20:25,789 --> 00:20:26,834
Look at you.
525
00:20:26,877 --> 00:20:27,965
You've got to be kidding me.
526
00:20:28,009 --> 00:20:29,663
It ain't no joke, player.
527
00:20:34,537 --> 00:20:36,235
Nice job, Troy.
528
00:20:36,278 --> 00:20:39,455
I can't believe a little white boy's
gonna be a homeowner before me.
529
00:20:39,499 --> 00:20:41,457
Welcome to America.
530
00:20:41,501 --> 00:20:43,111
How does all your footage look?
531
00:20:43,154 --> 00:20:45,244
Stupid Kevin forgot
to get the release forms.
532
00:20:45,287 --> 00:20:46,636
And after the contest was over,
533
00:20:46,680 --> 00:20:48,421
none of the losers
wanted to sign them.
534
00:20:48,464 --> 00:20:49,726
Don't worry, guys.
535
00:20:49,770 --> 00:20:51,728
Once I sell this house,
I'll be able to buy you
536
00:20:51,772 --> 00:20:54,296
your own movie theater.
We can show it there.
537
00:20:55,210 --> 00:20:56,994
You really have no concept
538
00:20:57,038 --> 00:20:58,779
of how much things cost, do you?
539
00:20:58,822 --> 00:21:00,520
Not really.
39650
Can't find what you're looking for?
Get subtitles in any language from opensubtitles.com, and translate them here.
Afrikaans
Akan
Albanian
Amharic
Arabic
Armenian
Azerbaijani
Basque
Belarusian
Bemba
Bengali
Bihari
Bosnian
Breton
Bulgarian
Cambodian
Catalan
Cebuano
Cherokee
Chichewa
Chinese (Simplified)
Chinese (Traditional)
Corsican
Croatian
Czech
Danish
Dutch
English
Esperanto
Estonian
Faroese
Finnish
Galician
Georgian
German
Guarani
Haitian Creole
Hausa
Hawaiian
Hebrew
Hmong
Hungarian
Icelandic
Indonesian
Irish
Italian
Japanese
Kazakh
Kinyarwanda
Kirundi
Kongo
Korean
Krio (Sierra Leone)
Kurdish
Kyrgyz
Laothian
Latin
Latvian
Lithuanian
Luganda
Luo
Luxembourgish
Macedonian
Malagasy
Malay
Maltese
Maori
Mauritian Creole
Moldavian
Mongolian
Myanmar (Burmese)
Montenegrin
Nepali
Norwegian
Pashto
Persian
Polish
Portuguese (Brazil)
Portuguese (Portugal)
Quechua
Romanian
Romansh
Russian
Samoan
Scots Gaelic
Serbian
Sesotho
Setswana
Seychellois Creole
Shona
Sindhi
Sinhalese
Slovak
Slovenian
Somali
Spanish
Swedish
Tajik
Thai
Tigrinya
Tonga
Turkish
Turkmen
Ukrainian
Uzbek
Vietnamese
Welsh
Wolof