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1
00:00:03,046 --> 00:00:05,048
Turn that off, boy. Your
father's about to come on.
2
00:00:05,092 --> 00:00:07,137
I know, I'm watching
the streaming broadcast.
3
00:00:07,181 --> 00:00:09,357
Why don't you just watch it
on the giant TV?
4
00:00:09,400 --> 00:00:11,141
Because the Internet
is streaming live.
5
00:00:11,185 --> 00:00:14,057
The TV has a delay. I wanna
see things as they happen.
6
00:00:14,101 --> 00:00:16,407
Wait a minute. So you mean,
what I'm seeing here
7
00:00:16,451 --> 00:00:18,192
and what you're seeing there...
8
00:00:18,235 --> 00:00:19,367
Are a few seconds apart.
9
00:00:19,410 --> 00:00:20,455
Huh.
10
00:00:20,498 --> 00:00:22,935
Okay, here we go.
11
00:00:22,979 --> 00:00:24,198
Right now... Right now...
12
00:00:24,241 --> 00:00:25,460
...we're gonna head out
to the streets...
13
00:00:25,503 --> 00:00:26,722
...we're gonna head out
to the streets...
14
00:00:26,765 --> 00:00:28,158
...with our very own...with our very own...
15
00:00:28,202 --> 00:00:30,769
...Nick Kingston-Persons...Nick Kingston-Persons.
16
00:00:30,813 --> 00:00:32,945
Nick? Ah! Ah! All right, I got it.
17
00:00:32,989 --> 00:00:34,904
I love the NFL.
18
00:00:34,947 --> 00:00:36,645
And if you've ever
watched a game
19
00:00:36,688 --> 00:00:38,908
and wondered what it was like
to be a quarterback,
20
00:00:38,951 --> 00:00:40,388
with only split seconds
21
00:00:40,431 --> 00:00:42,390
to make a decision
that makes the difference
22
00:00:42,433 --> 00:00:44,522
between getting first downs
23
00:00:44,566 --> 00:00:46,002
or getting knocked down,
24
00:00:46,046 --> 00:00:49,658
well, we are about to find out.
25
00:00:49,701 --> 00:00:53,140
'cause these guys are gonna
try to sack the quarterback.
26
00:00:53,183 --> 00:00:54,228
That's me.
27
00:00:56,534 --> 00:00:58,058
Omaha 36!
28
00:00:59,146 --> 00:01:00,843
Red 13!
29
00:01:01,626 --> 00:01:03,063
Hut. Hut!
30
00:01:03,889 --> 00:01:05,804
Oh! Whoa!
31
00:01:05,848 --> 00:01:07,110
What are you screaming about?
32
00:01:07,154 --> 00:01:08,459
Ah!
33
00:01:08,807 --> 00:01:10,287
Ow!
34
00:01:10,331 --> 00:01:12,072
Oh, my God. Is he okay?
35
00:01:12,115 --> 00:01:13,160
I think Dad just got
knocked out.
36
00:01:13,203 --> 00:01:14,726
I think Nick just got
knocked out.
37
00:01:14,770 --> 00:01:16,250
What? Are you sure?
38
00:01:16,293 --> 00:01:18,339
Yeah, I mean, why would he
wish we weren't watching?
39
00:01:18,382 --> 00:01:19,557
Nick... What?
40
00:01:19,601 --> 00:01:21,472
It's times like these
when you just hope
41
00:01:21,516 --> 00:01:24,040
a guy's family
isn't watching at home.
42
00:01:24,084 --> 00:01:25,520
What are they gonna do about it?
43
00:01:25,563 --> 00:01:27,696
I mean, they can't just
leave him lying there.
44
00:01:27,739 --> 00:01:29,959
I don't know, but they'll be
back after these messages.
45
00:01:30,002 --> 00:01:32,309
All right, we're gonna
figure out what's going on
46
00:01:32,353 --> 00:01:35,965
and we're gonna be right back
after these messages.
47
00:01:36,008 --> 00:01:38,010
I don't believe this.
48
00:01:38,054 --> 00:01:40,926
I know. That delay's crazy,
right?
49
00:01:42,841 --> 00:01:45,235
♪ Are we there yet?
50
00:01:45,279 --> 00:01:48,499
♪ Tell me, tell me, tell me
51
00:01:48,543 --> 00:01:50,284
♪ Tell me, are we there yet?
52
00:01:50,327 --> 00:01:51,981
♪ Are we there yet?
53
00:01:54,114 --> 00:01:55,724
Oh!
54
00:01:56,681 --> 00:01:58,814
Boy, what were you thinkin'?
55
00:01:58,857 --> 00:02:01,077
I was thinkin' I'm a TV guy
56
00:02:01,121 --> 00:02:03,427
and they were supposed
to go easy on me.
57
00:02:03,471 --> 00:02:05,777
That guy took you out
like a truck hitting a puppy.
58
00:02:05,821 --> 00:02:07,431
It wasn't that bad.
59
00:02:07,475 --> 00:02:10,173
Dad, excuse my French, but
you got knocked the hell out.
60
00:02:10,217 --> 00:02:12,175
Hey! Sorry.
61
00:02:12,219 --> 00:02:14,351
Lehell out.
62
00:02:14,395 --> 00:02:17,615
Man, he hit you so hard
it almost knocked me out.
63
00:02:17,659 --> 00:02:20,662
You know your football days
were over three concussions ago.
64
00:02:20,705 --> 00:02:22,272
Two. Just checking.
65
00:02:22,316 --> 00:02:24,318
They were supposed
to go easy on me.
66
00:02:24,361 --> 00:02:26,015
Somebody should've told
the dude who hit you.
67
00:02:26,058 --> 00:02:28,539
Child, he hit you like
there was a scholarship in it.
68
00:02:28,583 --> 00:02:31,281
That dude hit you like he was
auditioning for The Blind Side 2.
69
00:02:31,325 --> 00:02:34,066
He hit you like they were gonna
hit him like he hit you
70
00:02:34,110 --> 00:02:37,505
if he didn't hit you like
it was either you or him.
71
00:02:37,548 --> 00:02:39,115
Boy, your Daddy got
a concussion.
72
00:02:39,159 --> 00:02:41,509
How's he supposed to
understand all that?
73
00:02:41,552 --> 00:02:43,206
Somebody better call Suzanne
74
00:02:43,250 --> 00:02:44,512
and tell her I'm okay.
75
00:02:44,555 --> 00:02:46,383
I'll call her. That is not calling,
76
00:02:46,427 --> 00:02:48,124
that's texting. Call her.
77
00:02:50,431 --> 00:02:52,172
Figures she would leave town
78
00:02:52,215 --> 00:02:54,478
just when you're trying the
stupidest thing you can think of.
79
00:02:54,522 --> 00:02:57,481
Now, get out of that uniform
before I hit you. You need to lie down.
80
00:02:57,525 --> 00:02:58,787
No, no.
81
00:02:58,830 --> 00:03:00,615
You heard what the doctor said.
82
00:03:00,658 --> 00:03:02,617
I'm not taking any chances.
83
00:03:02,660 --> 00:03:05,228
Yeah, he said I was supposed
to stay awake for a few hours
84
00:03:05,272 --> 00:03:07,317
to make sure
there are no complications
85
00:03:07,361 --> 00:03:09,319
from this concussion. Oh!
86
00:03:09,363 --> 00:03:11,365
You know what? Your doctor said
you were fine. If you weren't,
87
00:03:11,408 --> 00:03:13,105
they would've kept you there
for observation,
88
00:03:13,149 --> 00:03:15,151
so they could see
what an idiot looks like.
89
00:03:15,195 --> 00:03:17,066
I spoke to Mom. Oh, what'd she say?
90
00:03:17,109 --> 00:03:18,981
She said she doesn't really
wanna talk to you right now
91
00:03:19,024 --> 00:03:20,591
because you nearly scared her
half to death.
92
00:03:20,635 --> 00:03:22,332
Oh, and she said she loves you.
93
00:03:22,376 --> 00:03:24,247
Dad, how many fingers
am I holding up?
94
00:03:24,291 --> 00:03:26,423
Uh, three more than
you're gonna have
95
00:03:26,467 --> 00:03:28,643
if you don't get your hand
out of my face, man.
96
00:03:28,686 --> 00:03:30,340
Don't get mad at me.
97
00:03:30,384 --> 00:03:32,690
You're the one who got
knocked out, I'm just trying to help.
98
00:03:32,734 --> 00:03:35,780
Look, you wanna help? Just hand
me that Jell-O I got from the hospital.
99
00:03:37,478 --> 00:03:38,914
And the spoon too.
100
00:03:44,224 --> 00:03:45,660
I'll be upstairs.
101
00:03:45,703 --> 00:03:47,227
Speaking of help,
102
00:03:47,270 --> 00:03:49,577
Marilyn, would you mind
driving me to Kelly's house?
103
00:03:49,620 --> 00:03:50,926
Mom said it was okay.
104
00:03:50,969 --> 00:03:52,319
Really? Mm-hmm.
105
00:03:52,362 --> 00:03:53,755
When did she say that?
106
00:03:53,798 --> 00:03:55,844
On the phone just about
a minute ago.
107
00:03:55,887 --> 00:03:58,281
Girl, he got the
concussion, not me.
108
00:03:58,325 --> 00:04:00,327
Now, your mama left a list
of do's and don'ts,
109
00:04:00,370 --> 00:04:02,590
and letting Lindsey go
to a party at Kelly's house
110
00:04:02,633 --> 00:04:03,895
is in the "don't" column.
111
00:04:05,114 --> 00:04:06,376
Oh!
112
00:04:06,420 --> 00:04:07,812
And the next time
you want to do somethin',
113
00:04:07,856 --> 00:04:09,336
don't try to trick people.
114
00:04:09,379 --> 00:04:11,773
Teachable moment, Lindsey.
Teachable moment.
115
00:04:13,427 --> 00:04:15,342
That was good, Ma.
116
00:04:15,385 --> 00:04:16,908
I know it.
117
00:04:16,952 --> 00:04:19,215
And here's a teachable moment
for you.
118
00:04:19,259 --> 00:04:21,304
The next time you plan
something this stupid,
119
00:04:21,348 --> 00:04:23,263
Mama gonna knock you out.
120
00:04:25,700 --> 00:04:27,049
Honey,
121
00:04:27,092 --> 00:04:28,659
as long as you're gonna be up,
122
00:04:28,703 --> 00:04:30,835
would you mind keeping an eye
on this eBay auction for me?
123
00:04:30,879 --> 00:04:32,315
It ends around 2:00 a.m.
124
00:04:32,359 --> 00:04:33,534
Sure. What is it?
125
00:04:33,577 --> 00:04:35,275
A vintage Chanel bag.
126
00:04:35,318 --> 00:04:36,972
I've had my eye on it
all weekend.
127
00:04:37,015 --> 00:04:39,496
Nobody's made a bid, so I don't
wanna miss it when they close out.
128
00:04:39,540 --> 00:04:41,324
It is as good as mine.
129
00:04:41,368 --> 00:04:42,586
I got it. Don't worry.
130
00:04:42,630 --> 00:04:44,240
Okay. Now, wait, baby.
131
00:04:44,284 --> 00:04:46,460
Look, now if you get tired
or sleepy,
132
00:04:46,503 --> 00:04:49,419
you feel like you're gonna faint
or anything like that, you call me.
133
00:04:49,463 --> 00:04:50,725
'Cause I want that bag.
134
00:04:50,768 --> 00:04:52,857
I'll get your bag. All right, you better.
135
00:04:52,901 --> 00:04:54,772
Unless you want
your fourth concussion.
136
00:04:54,816 --> 00:04:57,079
Third. Just checking.
137
00:04:58,254 --> 00:04:59,647
Hey, Dad.
138
00:05:06,262 --> 00:05:08,003
What are you doin' up?
139
00:05:08,046 --> 00:05:10,440
You think I'm up? Oh, man,
it's worse than I thought.
140
00:05:10,484 --> 00:05:12,529
Man... Ah!
141
00:05:12,573 --> 00:05:14,444
No, but, Dad I was doing
some research,
142
00:05:14,488 --> 00:05:16,838
and, um, if you do have
any complications,
143
00:05:16,881 --> 00:05:19,188
nobody's gonna know
if nobody's up to watch you.
144
00:05:19,231 --> 00:05:22,060
Plus, there's a football
game on tonight from Spain.
145
00:05:22,104 --> 00:05:24,498
You just wanna stay up and
watch that soccer game, don't you?
146
00:05:24,541 --> 00:05:26,064
No. Okay, Dad, look.
147
00:05:26,108 --> 00:05:28,632
I just wanna stay up to make
sure you don't go into a coma.
148
00:05:28,676 --> 00:05:30,808
I mean, look, missing
the game would suck,
149
00:05:30,852 --> 00:05:33,245
but you going into a coma
would suck way more.
150
00:05:33,289 --> 00:05:34,551
Man, bring that in here.
151
00:05:38,120 --> 00:05:39,513
Whoo!
152
00:05:39,556 --> 00:05:42,516
I wanna thank you
for all your concern.
153
00:05:42,559 --> 00:05:44,082
Okay?
154
00:05:44,126 --> 00:05:47,521
But you do realize that you
are not going to make it, okay?
155
00:05:47,564 --> 00:05:50,480
That game doesn't come on
until 2:00 in the morning.
156
00:05:50,524 --> 00:05:52,177
I'll make it.
157
00:05:52,221 --> 00:05:53,614
Right, right.
158
00:05:53,657 --> 00:05:54,702
Okay, you know what?
159
00:05:54,745 --> 00:05:56,312
You know what?
Instead of arguing,
160
00:05:56,356 --> 00:05:58,793
I'll just carry you upstairs
when you pass out,
161
00:05:58,836 --> 00:06:00,490
just like I was on that field.
162
00:06:03,580 --> 00:06:05,408
Hey, hey, hey, hey!
163
00:06:05,452 --> 00:06:06,583
Hey!
164
00:06:06,627 --> 00:06:08,585
Who's been messing with my DVR?
165
00:06:08,629 --> 00:06:10,152
I don't know what
you're talkin' about.
166
00:06:10,195 --> 00:06:11,588
Oh, you don't know
what I'm talkin' about?
167
00:06:11,632 --> 00:06:12,981
Look, I have reruns
168
00:06:13,024 --> 00:06:14,765
of the best NFL playoff games
169
00:06:14,809 --> 00:06:16,332
ever played, all right?
170
00:06:16,376 --> 00:06:18,726
Tonight was the
perfect night to watch,
171
00:06:18,769 --> 00:06:20,075
and they're all gone.
172
00:06:20,118 --> 00:06:22,207
There's nothing on here
but Storage Wars.
173
00:06:22,251 --> 00:06:23,731
It could be worse.
174
00:06:23,774 --> 00:06:25,515
Oh, how can it be
worse man, huh?
175
00:06:25,559 --> 00:06:26,603
How could it be worse?
176
00:06:26,647 --> 00:06:28,475
Listen, I got knocked out on TV.
177
00:06:28,518 --> 00:06:29,780
I got a concussion,
178
00:06:29,824 --> 00:06:31,695
my wife's not here
to give me sympathy,
179
00:06:31,739 --> 00:06:32,914
and I gotta stay up all night.
180
00:06:32,957 --> 00:06:34,568
How could it be worse than that?
181
00:06:34,611 --> 00:06:36,700
You could've peed yourself
when that guy knocked you out.
182
00:06:38,833 --> 00:06:40,791
Yeah, that's worse. Yes.
183
00:06:47,058 --> 00:06:50,410
All right, a few hours left
and still no bids.
184
00:06:55,327 --> 00:06:56,546
Good night.
185
00:06:56,590 --> 00:06:57,852
Good night.
186
00:06:57,895 --> 00:06:59,462
Thanks for hanging with me.
187
00:07:01,377 --> 00:07:04,249
Sleep tight. I'll record
the game for you.
188
00:07:10,865 --> 00:07:13,824
Hey, hey, hey.
Coma Squad in the house. Yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah.
189
00:07:13,868 --> 00:07:16,479
Shh.Sorry. Don't wanna wake up
the whole house.
190
00:07:16,523 --> 00:07:19,482
But just so you know, The
Coma Squad is in full effect.
191
00:07:19,526 --> 00:07:21,223
That's funny.
192
00:07:21,266 --> 00:07:22,572
That is funny.
193
00:07:22,616 --> 00:07:24,182
The Coma Squad?
194
00:07:24,226 --> 00:07:26,315
Yeah, that's the name we
came up with on the way over.
195
00:07:26,358 --> 00:07:28,230
Were you drinking
those beers at the time?
196
00:07:28,273 --> 00:07:29,492
It's a good name.
197
00:07:29,536 --> 00:07:30,754
The name doesn't matter.
198
00:07:30,798 --> 00:07:32,495
You called, we showed up
199
00:07:32,539 --> 00:07:34,802
with food and beer... Mm-hmm.
200
00:07:34,845 --> 00:07:37,631
...to keep you company while
you try not to fall into a coma.
201
00:07:37,674 --> 00:07:40,155
It's true. Even if we had
called ourselves
202
00:07:40,198 --> 00:07:43,027
"The Super Action Boy
Fantastic Dream Team"...
203
00:07:43,071 --> 00:07:45,508
The real important thing
is we're here.
204
00:07:45,552 --> 00:07:47,510
Okay, please tell me
205
00:07:47,554 --> 00:07:50,339
you are not thinking of actually
calling yourselves that.
206
00:07:50,382 --> 00:07:52,167
Look, we made him change it.
207
00:07:53,255 --> 00:07:54,822
Want a beer?
208
00:07:54,865 --> 00:07:57,912
Dude, you do not treat
a concussion with beer.
209
00:07:57,955 --> 00:07:59,696
He wasn't really gonna
give it to you.
210
00:07:59,740 --> 00:08:02,699
We just wanted to know if you
were brain-damaged enough to take it.
211
00:08:02,743 --> 00:08:04,832
I'm not brain-damaged,
all right?
212
00:08:04,875 --> 00:08:06,181
It's just a concussion.
213
00:08:06,224 --> 00:08:08,183
You're lucky that's all it was.
214
00:08:08,226 --> 00:08:10,402
What were you thinking going out
there with professional football players?
215
00:08:10,446 --> 00:08:11,578
I don't know.
216
00:08:11,621 --> 00:08:13,101
I know what you
weren't thinking.
217
00:08:13,144 --> 00:08:15,146
That you was gonna get
knocked out like a front tooth.
218
00:08:15,190 --> 00:08:16,626
That dude hit you
219
00:08:16,670 --> 00:08:17,801
like he hit his mama
220
00:08:17,845 --> 00:08:19,194
like he hit you.
221
00:08:19,237 --> 00:08:20,500
What?
222
00:08:20,543 --> 00:08:21,849
It's circular logic.
223
00:08:21,892 --> 00:08:23,459
Don't try to figure it out.
224
00:08:23,503 --> 00:08:26,027
Well, guys, I just want
to say thanks.
225
00:08:26,070 --> 00:08:28,116
You know, not a lot of people
would come over
226
00:08:28,159 --> 00:08:29,683
and stay up all night
with me like this.
227
00:08:29,726 --> 00:08:31,641
Uh, try until midnight,
228
00:08:31,685 --> 00:08:34,122
unless you want my wife calling
over here every five minutes
229
00:08:34,165 --> 00:08:35,863
to find out if this
is where I actually am.
230
00:08:37,604 --> 00:08:39,214
What'd you do that your wife
has to call you every five minutes?
231
00:08:39,257 --> 00:08:41,129
Something that took six minutes.
232
00:08:41,172 --> 00:08:42,565
Did anybody ask you?
233
00:08:42,609 --> 00:08:43,958
Okay, okay.
234
00:08:44,001 --> 00:08:46,656
You gotta leave at midnight.
I get it.
235
00:08:46,700 --> 00:08:48,353
I got to go at midnight too.
236
00:08:48,397 --> 00:08:49,703
Oh, where you going?
237
00:08:49,746 --> 00:08:51,879
You don't ask a grown man
about his business.
238
00:08:51,922 --> 00:08:53,794
I know. I'm asking you.
239
00:08:55,143 --> 00:08:57,319
Well, Nick, unlike these losers,
240
00:08:57,362 --> 00:08:58,712
I'm not going anywhere.
241
00:08:58,755 --> 00:09:00,496
My man.
242
00:09:01,279 --> 00:09:02,933
Ooh! I have to go.
243
00:09:02,977 --> 00:09:04,413
Oh, come... No.
244
00:09:04,456 --> 00:09:05,893
You're kidding. Come on.
245
00:09:05,936 --> 00:09:07,982
- Sorry, fellas.
- Loser.
246
00:09:09,287 --> 00:09:10,419
Represent, brother.
247
00:09:10,462 --> 00:09:12,421
Ah, man. All right,
248
00:09:12,464 --> 00:09:13,944
we got about an hour.
249
00:09:13,988 --> 00:09:17,513
That's just enough time
for some seven-card stud.
250
00:09:17,557 --> 00:09:20,995
Hmm, I don't think I'm thinking
clearly enough for that, man.
251
00:09:21,038 --> 00:09:22,649
All right how about draw poker?
252
00:09:22,692 --> 00:09:24,215
There's not a lot
of calculating in that.
253
00:09:24,259 --> 00:09:25,521
I don't know.
254
00:09:26,609 --> 00:09:28,785
Fine. Uh, blackjack.
255
00:09:28,829 --> 00:09:30,526
You can still
count to 21, right?
256
00:09:32,136 --> 00:09:34,791
Um, that's a lot
of card countin'.
257
00:09:34,835 --> 00:09:36,358
So, what do you wanna play?
258
00:09:41,668 --> 00:09:42,973
Go fish.
259
00:09:44,061 --> 00:09:46,194
You got any... Jacks?
260
00:09:46,237 --> 00:09:47,412
Ah!
261
00:09:47,456 --> 00:09:48,500
Ah!
262
00:09:48,544 --> 00:09:51,155
And, bam!
263
00:09:51,199 --> 00:09:55,116
Ah, you fools owe me $75.
264
00:09:56,552 --> 00:09:57,814
What the hell?
265
00:10:00,469 --> 00:10:02,340
Hello? MIKE: I always win.
266
00:10:02,384 --> 00:10:03,690
Oh, okay, yeah,
267
00:10:03,733 --> 00:10:05,256
yeah, all right, all right.
268
00:10:05,300 --> 00:10:06,693
Malcolm? It's for you man. MALCOLM: Yo.
269
00:10:06,736 --> 00:10:08,433
Oh, damn.
270
00:10:08,477 --> 00:10:09,739
I'm leaving now.
271
00:10:10,610 --> 00:10:11,828
I got to get going.
272
00:10:11,872 --> 00:10:13,221
You gonna be okay?
273
00:10:13,264 --> 00:10:14,352
Yeah.
274
00:10:14,396 --> 00:10:16,224
Listen, if you fall into a coma,
275
00:10:16,267 --> 00:10:17,704
call somebody, all right?
276
00:10:18,661 --> 00:10:20,489
Now, how exactly
would I do that?
277
00:10:20,532 --> 00:10:23,274
Look, man, I'm just trying
to care for you, here.
278
00:10:23,318 --> 00:10:25,494
Don't kill me on technicalities.
279
00:10:25,537 --> 00:10:26,756
Okay, I'm leaving now.
280
00:10:26,800 --> 00:10:28,323
Listen, I gotta be home
in six minutes
281
00:10:28,366 --> 00:10:29,498
or I'm gonna have a concussion.
282
00:10:29,541 --> 00:10:30,717
All right, go, go.
283
00:10:30,760 --> 00:10:32,632
I do not want that woman
calling here again.
284
00:10:32,675 --> 00:10:34,329
Oh, man.
285
00:10:34,372 --> 00:10:35,983
Oh, man, will you
get out of here? Go, go.
286
00:10:36,026 --> 00:10:37,985
Hey, yes. Oh, okay, all right.
287
00:10:38,028 --> 00:10:39,421
Yes. No, no, he's not here.
288
00:10:39,464 --> 00:10:41,553
No, he's not acting
like he's not here.
289
00:10:41,597 --> 00:10:43,207
Yeah, I know. Okay, all right.
290
00:10:43,251 --> 00:10:45,296
I got to go. I got to go.
I got to go.
291
00:11:48,795 --> 00:11:50,448
Troy!
292
00:11:50,492 --> 00:11:51,972
Mr. Kingston-Persons,
293
00:11:52,015 --> 00:11:53,495
you scared the heck out of me.
294
00:11:53,538 --> 00:11:54,801
I scared you?
295
00:11:54,844 --> 00:11:56,324
You scared me.
296
00:11:56,367 --> 00:11:58,152
Man, I already got a concussion.
297
00:11:58,195 --> 00:12:00,067
What you trying to do,
give me a heart attack too?
298
00:12:00,110 --> 00:12:01,764
What are you doing here?
299
00:12:01,808 --> 00:12:02,983
It's 1:00 a.m.
300
00:12:03,505 --> 00:12:05,333
Exactly.
301
00:12:05,376 --> 00:12:08,771
Yeah, I always come over here
at 1:00 a.m. to get a snack.
302
00:12:08,815 --> 00:12:11,556
Hey, who erased
all my Storage Wars?
303
00:12:11,600 --> 00:12:14,385
Okay. You're the one that
erased all my playoff games?
304
00:12:14,429 --> 00:12:16,866
Those things were all
ten or 15 years old.
305
00:12:16,910 --> 00:12:18,389
If you don't know who
won those by now,
306
00:12:18,433 --> 00:12:20,000
that's on you.
307
00:12:20,043 --> 00:12:22,263
Man, take your sandwich and go.
308
00:12:22,306 --> 00:12:25,092
And quit coming over here
in the middle of the night.
309
00:12:25,135 --> 00:12:27,529
Man, somebody's gonna get hurt.
310
00:12:27,572 --> 00:12:29,270
Hey, speaking of hurt,
311
00:12:29,313 --> 00:12:32,447
why would you go in there with
all those pro football players?
312
00:12:32,490 --> 00:12:35,711
They knocked you out like the
Foreman Grill knocks out the fat.
313
00:12:35,755 --> 00:12:37,800
Man, get out of here.
314
00:12:37,844 --> 00:12:39,933
I ain't having no little white
boy running around here
315
00:12:39,976 --> 00:12:41,935
in the middle of the night. Out!
316
00:12:42,805 --> 00:12:44,372
You're out of pumpernickel.
317
00:12:44,415 --> 00:12:45,677
What'd you call me?
318
00:12:50,987 --> 00:12:52,423
Knock, knock.Terrence.
319
00:12:52,467 --> 00:12:53,816
Look what I found.
320
00:12:53,860 --> 00:12:54,904
Lindsey!
321
00:12:55,557 --> 00:12:56,993
What's going on?
322
00:12:57,037 --> 00:12:58,821
Now, Suzanne asked me
to watch the place
323
00:12:58,865 --> 00:13:00,475
while she was gone, all right?
324
00:13:00,518 --> 00:13:02,259
I'm staked out
across the street,
325
00:13:02,303 --> 00:13:04,653
that's when I see little
Miss Thang sneak by,
326
00:13:04,696 --> 00:13:07,743
all dressed up like she
on the last train to Paris.
327
00:13:07,787 --> 00:13:09,223
Are you crazy?
328
00:13:09,266 --> 00:13:11,312
Sneaking out in the middle
of the night?
329
00:13:11,355 --> 00:13:13,053
Okay, I went over to Kelly's,
330
00:13:13,096 --> 00:13:15,185
and then Uncle Terrence
burst in,
331
00:13:15,229 --> 00:13:16,796
embarrassed me,
332
00:13:16,839 --> 00:13:18,710
and then brought me here.
333
00:13:18,754 --> 00:13:20,451
No money, no phone,
334
00:13:20,495 --> 00:13:22,714
no parties for four days.
335
00:13:22,758 --> 00:13:24,847
Dad! Five. Give me the phone.
336
00:13:26,153 --> 00:13:27,502
Six!
337
00:13:27,545 --> 00:13:28,590
Come on.
338
00:13:28,633 --> 00:13:30,374
Seven!
339
00:13:30,418 --> 00:13:32,246
Wh... Oh. Eight, for the look.
340
00:13:32,289 --> 00:13:34,291
Now, what? Look at me
like that again.
341
00:13:35,815 --> 00:13:37,338
Nine, for the way you stompin'.
342
00:13:39,906 --> 00:13:41,342
Ten, for the breathing.
343
00:13:42,865 --> 00:13:44,432
You got to be hard on them, man.
344
00:13:45,520 --> 00:13:46,826
Thanks a lot, man.
345
00:13:46,869 --> 00:13:48,784
Don't worry about it.
346
00:13:48,828 --> 00:13:50,873
How long you been
out there, anyway?
347
00:13:50,917 --> 00:13:53,397
Long enough to hear you scream
like a little girl
348
00:13:53,441 --> 00:13:55,835
when Troy snuck in here
to watch Storage Wars.
349
00:13:55,878 --> 00:13:57,880
I'm trying to deal
with this concussion, man
350
00:13:57,924 --> 00:13:59,099
So... What's that?
351
00:14:00,665 --> 00:14:02,450
It don't work
like that, dum-dum.
352
00:14:02,493 --> 00:14:04,234
You got to have
all your marbles.
353
00:14:04,278 --> 00:14:06,280
You obviously don't, all right?
354
00:14:06,323 --> 00:14:07,585
So, keep your head up
355
00:14:07,629 --> 00:14:09,849
and your little
girly screams down.
356
00:14:09,892 --> 00:14:12,895
I'm trying to get
some sleep out here.
357
00:14:12,939 --> 00:14:14,897
I wasn't screaming.
Nobody's screaming...
358
00:14:14,941 --> 00:14:16,507
Door slam.
359
00:14:18,945 --> 00:14:21,817
All right. Chanel purse,
360
00:14:21,861 --> 00:14:23,906
60 seconds left.
361
00:14:23,950 --> 00:14:30,260
Here we go. $275,
362
00:14:30,304 --> 00:14:33,046
and... submit.
363
00:14:35,352 --> 00:14:37,746
Whoa, whoa, whoa! Outbid?
364
00:14:37,789 --> 00:14:39,400
Outbid?
365
00:14:39,443 --> 00:14:40,792
Oh, okay.
366
00:14:40,836 --> 00:14:42,185
Oh, no, no, player.
367
00:14:42,229 --> 00:14:43,752
I see what you tryin' to do.
368
00:14:43,795 --> 00:14:45,058
I see what you tryin' to do.
369
00:14:45,101 --> 00:14:46,755
Okay, okay. Uh-huh.
370
00:14:46,798 --> 00:14:49,192
Here we go. You gonna try
to snipe me, huh?
371
00:14:49,236 --> 00:14:50,498
You gonna try to snipe me?
372
00:14:50,541 --> 00:14:52,500
I'm gonna do this to you
right here.
373
00:14:52,979 --> 00:14:56,721
$758, huh?
374
00:14:56,765 --> 00:14:58,636
How 'bout I put that
in there for you?
375
00:14:58,680 --> 00:15:00,203
Put that in there for you.
376
00:15:00,247 --> 00:15:03,119
Bam! Huh?
377
00:15:03,163 --> 00:15:05,513
And what we got?
What we got? What we got?
378
00:15:05,556 --> 00:15:07,341
Oh, yeah!
379
00:15:07,384 --> 00:15:09,082
What? Huh? What?
380
00:15:09,125 --> 00:15:11,301
How you gonna try
to snipe me, player?
381
00:15:11,345 --> 00:15:12,912
That's what I do, dawg.
382
00:15:12,955 --> 00:15:15,479
That is what I do.
That's how I play it, man.
383
00:15:15,523 --> 00:15:18,395
Ain't nothin' coming between
me and a bag for my mama.
384
00:15:18,439 --> 00:15:19,614
Nothin'!
385
00:15:19,657 --> 00:15:21,659
♪ Ah, I got a bag for my mama
386
00:15:21,703 --> 00:15:23,661
♪ I got a bag for my mama
387
00:15:23,705 --> 00:15:25,402
♪ Hey, I got a bag for my mama
388
00:15:25,446 --> 00:15:26,577
♪ Uh, I got a bag for my mama
389
00:15:26,621 --> 00:15:28,231
Dad? Dad!
390
00:15:28,275 --> 00:15:30,886
Hey, oh, oh, whoa, whoa, dude!
391
00:15:30,930 --> 00:15:33,671
Don't sneak up on me
like that, man.
392
00:15:33,715 --> 00:15:35,630
I just came down
to watch the game.
393
00:15:35,673 --> 00:15:36,718
What are you doing?
394
00:15:37,327 --> 00:15:38,676
I was...
395
00:15:38,720 --> 00:15:41,244
bidding on a purse on eBay
for your grandmother.
396
00:15:41,288 --> 00:15:42,898
Did you get it?
397
00:15:42,942 --> 00:15:44,552
What's my name?
398
00:15:44,595 --> 00:15:46,032
What's my name? Huh?
399
00:15:46,075 --> 00:15:48,686
What is my name? Oh, man!
I gotta call the doctor!
400
00:15:48,730 --> 00:15:51,733
Hey, hey, why? No! No, no,
what are you talking about?
401
00:15:51,776 --> 00:15:53,343
Dad, sit down, okay?
402
00:15:53,387 --> 00:15:55,563
You're having complications!
403
00:15:55,606 --> 00:15:58,783
No, no, no,
this is not complications.
404
00:15:58,827 --> 00:16:02,265
Yes, just a second ago, you couldn't
even remember your own name.
405
00:16:02,309 --> 00:16:04,964
No, Kevin. Kevin, stop. Stop.
It's not complications,
406
00:16:05,007 --> 00:16:06,400
I was bragging.
407
00:16:06,443 --> 00:16:08,315
I'm bragging, okay?
408
00:16:08,358 --> 00:16:10,012
About getting the purse,
all right?
409
00:16:10,056 --> 00:16:11,187
I'm the purse master.
410
00:16:11,840 --> 00:16:13,407
I'm Nick, right?
411
00:16:13,450 --> 00:16:15,017
I'm good. Oh!
412
00:16:15,061 --> 00:16:17,498
Oh, you scared me.
413
00:16:17,541 --> 00:16:19,456
Well, in that case, let me
get some for that purse.
414
00:16:22,677 --> 00:16:24,026
And, Dad... Hmm?
415
00:16:24,070 --> 00:16:25,332
Don't brag.
416
00:16:32,992 --> 00:16:34,036
I'm like,
417
00:16:34,080 --> 00:16:35,385
"I know."
418
00:16:35,429 --> 00:16:37,518
I know, right?
I mean, seriously.
419
00:16:37,561 --> 00:16:39,955
Lindsey. Off the phone.
420
00:16:39,999 --> 00:16:42,044
But, Dad, I have to talk
to my friends.
421
00:16:42,088 --> 00:16:44,133
Are these the same friends
leading you on a life of crime?
422
00:16:44,177 --> 00:16:45,613
That's 12 days.
423
00:16:45,656 --> 00:16:48,181
But, Dad! That's 13 days.
Give me the phone.
424
00:16:49,138 --> 00:16:50,966
Two weeks.
425
00:16:51,923 --> 00:16:53,316
What?
426
00:16:55,927 --> 00:16:57,407
Whoo!
427
00:16:57,451 --> 00:16:59,018
Good morning, sweetie.
428
00:16:59,061 --> 00:17:00,628
Oh, good morning.
429
00:17:00,671 --> 00:17:03,022
It's good to see Captain
Coldcocked is out of the woods.
430
00:17:03,544 --> 00:17:04,849
Ma,
431
00:17:04,893 --> 00:17:07,069
how can you make fun
of your own son like that?
432
00:17:07,113 --> 00:17:08,940
Easy, watch.
433
00:17:08,984 --> 00:17:11,987
How many football players does it
take to knock out a news anchor?
434
00:17:12,031 --> 00:17:13,423
How many?
435
00:17:13,467 --> 00:17:15,904
When it's you, just one.
436
00:17:18,950 --> 00:17:21,083
Aah! Ha, ha.
437
00:17:21,127 --> 00:17:23,129
Aah!
438
00:17:23,172 --> 00:17:25,827
Aah! Aah, aah, aah, aah!
439
00:17:25,870 --> 00:17:27,307
Aah!
440
00:17:27,350 --> 00:17:29,178
Aah! Ha, ha, ha.
441
00:17:29,222 --> 00:17:31,093
Aah, aah, aah.
442
00:17:31,137 --> 00:17:32,921
Ha!
443
00:17:32,964 --> 00:17:35,315
Now, if you are through
making fun of me,
444
00:17:35,358 --> 00:17:37,186
I got some good news.
445
00:17:37,230 --> 00:17:40,146
What? That guy knocked some
sense into you and you want a divorce?
446
00:17:40,189 --> 00:17:43,062
Aah! Aah!
447
00:17:43,105 --> 00:17:45,542
Aah! Aah!
448
00:17:45,586 --> 00:17:47,240
Aah!
449
00:17:47,283 --> 00:17:50,025
Aah! Aah!
450
00:17:50,069 --> 00:17:51,940
Aah, aah!
451
00:17:51,983 --> 00:17:53,463
Are you through?
452
00:17:53,507 --> 00:17:55,944
Oh, boy, where's your sense
of humor? What's the news?
453
00:17:55,987 --> 00:17:57,641
I got your bag.
454
00:17:57,685 --> 00:17:59,556
Shut up! You did?
455
00:17:59,600 --> 00:18:01,819
Oh, you know, with you
scaring me half to death,
456
00:18:01,863 --> 00:18:04,387
I forgot all about...
Oh, this is fantastic!
457
00:18:04,431 --> 00:18:07,086
I've had my eye on
that bag since it went up.
458
00:18:07,129 --> 00:18:08,435
Oh, baby!
459
00:18:08,478 --> 00:18:10,132
Well, it will be off the web
460
00:18:10,176 --> 00:18:11,481
and in your hot little hands
461
00:18:11,525 --> 00:18:12,961
as soon as you make the payment.
462
00:18:13,004 --> 00:18:15,485
Oh, that's my baby!
Oh, I can't wait.
463
00:18:15,529 --> 00:18:17,357
So, how much did you
end up paying for it?
464
00:18:17,400 --> 00:18:19,924
Well, it was a little more
than I expected.
465
00:18:19,968 --> 00:18:22,405
Oh, that's all right. But it went right down
to the wire.
466
00:18:22,449 --> 00:18:24,581
Now, look somebody
tried to snipe me.
467
00:18:24,625 --> 00:18:26,540
I almost didn't get it,
468
00:18:26,583 --> 00:18:29,195
but, boy, he came through
for you, Mama.
469
00:18:29,238 --> 00:18:30,674
♪ I got the bag for my mama
470
00:18:30,718 --> 00:18:31,762
♪ I got the bag for my mama
471
00:18:34,200 --> 00:18:37,072
$800?
472
00:18:37,116 --> 00:18:39,640
For a used bag?
Man, what were you thinkin'?
473
00:18:39,683 --> 00:18:42,599
Did somebody come up here and
knock you upside your head again?
474
00:18:42,643 --> 00:18:44,645
You didn't give me
a spending cap.
475
00:18:44,688 --> 00:18:47,300
I should've given you
a dunce cap.
476
00:18:48,214 --> 00:18:50,129
What were you thinkin'? Ah...
477
00:18:54,350 --> 00:18:56,787
I'll get it. I got the door. Oh, oh, yeah, I thought
you were asleep.
478
00:18:57,440 --> 00:19:00,008
Boy! $800.
479
00:19:02,532 --> 00:19:04,360
There he is.
480
00:19:04,404 --> 00:19:06,884
The Master of Disaster,
481
00:19:06,928 --> 00:19:08,843
King of Out Cold,
482
00:19:08,886 --> 00:19:10,888
Lieutenant Loopy,
483
00:19:10,932 --> 00:19:12,890
Doctor Got Clocked.
484
00:19:12,934 --> 00:19:15,197
Ladies and gentlemen, the man who's
not afraid to get himself damn near killed
485
00:19:15,241 --> 00:19:17,199
for a public who couldn't
care less,
486
00:19:17,243 --> 00:19:19,854
Nick Kingston-Persons.
487
00:19:19,897 --> 00:19:22,073
Okay, okay. Yes, sir.
488
00:19:22,117 --> 00:19:23,510
How are you, buddy?
489
00:19:23,553 --> 00:19:25,686
Well, you know, I'm good.
I got a little headache.
490
00:19:25,729 --> 00:19:26,904
A little headache? Nick,
491
00:19:26,948 --> 00:19:28,819
you got hit so hard,
I got a concussion,
492
00:19:28,863 --> 00:19:30,821
All right? I just got back
from the ER.
493
00:19:31,735 --> 00:19:33,084
Just got back.
494
00:19:33,128 --> 00:19:35,130
Okay, did you just
come here to mock me
495
00:19:35,174 --> 00:19:36,218
or did you want anything else?
496
00:19:36,262 --> 00:19:37,480
I came here to mock you,
497
00:19:37,524 --> 00:19:40,309
and I got some presents for you.
498
00:19:40,353 --> 00:19:43,617
This stuff is so good.
499
00:19:44,357 --> 00:19:45,662
DVD of the hit.
500
00:19:45,706 --> 00:19:46,750
Okay?
501
00:19:46,794 --> 00:19:48,317
On a loop, all right?
502
00:19:48,839 --> 00:19:50,189
Wait.
503
00:19:50,232 --> 00:19:52,669
The guys from the team
504
00:19:52,713 --> 00:19:55,281
autographed your helmet.
505
00:19:55,977 --> 00:19:57,065
Huh?
506
00:19:58,109 --> 00:19:59,241
I got something
better than that.
507
00:19:59,285 --> 00:20:00,242
What is that?
508
00:20:01,287 --> 00:20:04,290
Here's a photo of all the tweets
509
00:20:04,333 --> 00:20:05,639
that went up
510
00:20:05,682 --> 00:20:07,075
the second you got hit.
511
00:20:08,381 --> 00:20:09,730
Okay.
512
00:20:11,340 --> 00:20:14,474
"Nick Kingston-Persons
is straight baby thighs,
513
00:20:14,517 --> 00:20:15,736
"hashtag soft."
514
00:20:15,779 --> 00:20:17,346
Yeah, that was me.
515
00:20:17,955 --> 00:20:19,653
All right, now...
516
00:20:20,436 --> 00:20:21,916
My favorite.
517
00:20:22,525 --> 00:20:23,874
The DVD...
518
00:20:24,832 --> 00:20:25,920
of you
519
00:20:25,963 --> 00:20:28,270
right after you got hit, okay?
520
00:20:28,314 --> 00:20:29,837
We just released it
this morning.
521
00:20:29,880 --> 00:20:31,142
It's already viral.
522
00:20:31,186 --> 00:20:33,667
It's a huge deal
on the Internet.
523
00:20:33,710 --> 00:20:35,930
You filmed me after I got hit?
524
00:20:35,973 --> 00:20:37,714
We were trying to
keep you lucid, Nick.
525
00:20:37,758 --> 00:20:39,716
We did it for you, all right?
526
00:20:39,760 --> 00:20:41,370
Now, watch this
527
00:20:41,414 --> 00:20:44,330
because it does not get old.
528
00:20:46,723 --> 00:20:48,290
Hey, Mama.
529
00:20:48,334 --> 00:20:49,552
Hey.
530
00:20:49,596 --> 00:20:51,511
Is this how Daddy died?
531
00:20:51,554 --> 00:20:54,165
Boy, you just got knocked
the hell out.
532
00:20:59,083 --> 00:21:00,607
Hey, Daddy.
533
00:21:00,650 --> 00:21:01,999
Hi, Dad.
37132
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