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1
00:00:02,698 --> 00:00:06,136
So, uh, how long are
your parents staying, again?
2
00:00:07,616 --> 00:00:09,705
Nick, they're my parents.
3
00:00:09,748 --> 00:00:11,402
They can stay
as long as they'd like.
4
00:00:11,446 --> 00:00:14,927
Look, baby, you know I like
your father, but your mom...
5
00:00:14,971 --> 00:00:16,581
Oh, what?
6
00:00:16,625 --> 00:00:18,714
Baby doesn't like it when my
mother gives him a hard time?
7
00:00:19,758 --> 00:00:21,325
Hard time?
8
00:00:21,369 --> 00:00:23,849
The border patrol
gives Mexicans a hard time.
9
00:00:23,893 --> 00:00:26,156
The Tea Party
gives Obama a hard time.
10
00:00:26,200 --> 00:00:28,289
The Palestinians give the... Hey!
11
00:00:28,332 --> 00:00:29,768
You remember
what happened to Arsenio?
12
00:00:32,119 --> 00:00:34,947
You know what I'm saying.
Your mother doesn't like me.
13
00:00:34,991 --> 00:00:36,862
Look, I can take her
talking about me,
14
00:00:36,906 --> 00:00:40,257
but I just wish she'd actually
call me by my name for once.
15
00:00:40,301 --> 00:00:42,477
Nick, she calls you
by your name all the time.
16
00:00:42,520 --> 00:00:44,870
No, she calls me
names all the time,
17
00:00:44,914 --> 00:00:46,176
but none of them are mine.
18
00:00:47,830 --> 00:00:49,614
Hey, Mama. Hi, sweetie.
19
00:00:49,658 --> 00:00:52,704
Suzanne, would you put this
in your freezer for me?
20
00:00:53,618 --> 00:00:54,793
Oh, sure.
21
00:00:55,707 --> 00:00:58,188
Ooh, top shelf.
22
00:00:58,232 --> 00:01:01,626
Marilyn, did you bring
a gift for my mother?
23
00:01:01,670 --> 00:01:04,151
- Your mother?
- That's for me.
24
00:01:04,194 --> 00:01:06,327
How do you think I'm
supposed to deal with her?
25
00:01:06,370 --> 00:01:08,764
Fine. Then you can
put it in the freezer yourself.
26
00:01:10,331 --> 00:01:11,810
I got it, Mom.
27
00:01:12,637 --> 00:01:14,857
I mean, really...
28
00:01:14,900 --> 00:01:17,294
My baby is taking care
of her grandkids,
29
00:01:17,338 --> 00:01:19,905
and she got the nerve
to criticize him.
30
00:01:19,949 --> 00:01:23,039
Fine. You both
hate my parents. Got it.
31
00:01:23,083 --> 00:01:24,432
We like your father.
32
00:01:24,475 --> 00:01:25,998
Yeah, we just like
your mother a lot less.
33
00:01:26,782 --> 00:01:28,262
She said that.
34
00:01:28,305 --> 00:01:30,046
Hey, Mom. Check it out.Hey.
35
00:01:30,090 --> 00:01:32,309
Oh, what's in the bag?
36
00:01:32,353 --> 00:01:35,138
Okay, so we got presents
for Grandma and Granddad.Mmm-hmm.
37
00:01:35,182 --> 00:01:37,836
This is for Granddad.Mmm-hmm.
38
00:01:37,880 --> 00:01:41,101
And this is for Grandma.
It's a necklace.
39
00:01:41,144 --> 00:01:43,494
Aw, that's sweet.
40
00:01:43,538 --> 00:01:44,930
And then we got Grandma
41
00:01:44,974 --> 00:01:47,585
a "World's
Greatest Grandma" T-shirt.
42
00:01:47,629 --> 00:01:50,153
Well, if you ever buy me
anything with "Grandma" on it,
43
00:01:50,197 --> 00:01:51,850
I'll tell you what... We know. We know.
44
00:01:51,894 --> 00:01:53,374
You'll hit us
upside the head with it.
45
00:01:53,417 --> 00:01:54,679
And it'll be your own fault.
46
00:01:58,205 --> 00:01:59,554
What's up, everybody?
47
00:01:59,597 --> 00:02:02,034
Whoa, nice!
48
00:02:02,078 --> 00:02:03,775
What did you do?
Give up black ops?
49
00:02:03,819 --> 00:02:05,516
Yeah, and I took up white ops.
50
00:02:06,038 --> 00:02:07,214
What?
51
00:02:07,257 --> 00:02:09,172
Mama don't know
what I do for a living.
52
00:02:09,216 --> 00:02:11,261
And I don't want her
to be all worried about me,
53
00:02:11,305 --> 00:02:13,829
so I told her I was an
accountant for the IRS.
54
00:02:15,483 --> 00:02:17,180
What do you know about
being an accountant?
55
00:02:17,224 --> 00:02:18,964
I know they wear nice suits,
56
00:02:19,008 --> 00:02:20,879
and I also know
if you snitch on me,
57
00:02:20,923 --> 00:02:22,142
you're gonna come up missing.
58
00:02:23,230 --> 00:02:24,796
That is my child.
59
00:02:24,840 --> 00:02:27,234
You can get another
one. I know people.
60
00:02:29,018 --> 00:02:31,151
♪ Are we there yet?
61
00:02:31,194 --> 00:02:34,980
♪ Tell me, tell me, tell me
62
00:02:35,024 --> 00:02:36,286
♪ Tell me, are we there yet?
63
00:02:36,330 --> 00:02:37,983
♪ Are we there yet?
64
00:02:44,599 --> 00:02:47,645
Well, if it isn't Mr. Big Stuff.
65
00:02:47,689 --> 00:02:49,604
Hey, Pam, how you doing?
66
00:02:49,647 --> 00:02:50,996
Grandma!
67
00:02:51,040 --> 00:02:53,085
Look at you!
68
00:02:53,129 --> 00:02:54,652
Hey!
69
00:02:54,696 --> 00:02:56,437
You lookin' so pretty.
You know what? Thank you.
70
00:02:56,480 --> 00:02:58,352
I have something
special for you.
71
00:02:58,395 --> 00:02:59,875
Cool!
72
00:02:59,918 --> 00:03:02,182
And for you. Thank you.
This is for you.
73
00:03:02,225 --> 00:03:04,096
Thank you, baby.
74
00:03:04,140 --> 00:03:05,185
Hey, Mom.
75
00:03:05,228 --> 00:03:06,838
Come here.
76
00:03:06,882 --> 00:03:09,624
Come here.
You look so beautiful.
77
00:03:09,667 --> 00:03:11,713
Thank you. I get
it from my mama.
78
00:03:12,931 --> 00:03:14,150
Come on in. Have a seat.
79
00:03:14,194 --> 00:03:15,847
Look at my... Pam?
80
00:03:19,199 --> 00:03:21,679
Marilyn, I didn't see you.
81
00:03:21,723 --> 00:03:24,160
Well, at your age, the
vision does start to go.
82
00:03:26,336 --> 00:03:27,729
Boochy.
83
00:03:27,772 --> 00:03:29,339
Boochy?
84
00:03:29,383 --> 00:03:32,864
What? "Boochy" is not a
good enough nickname for you?
85
00:03:34,039 --> 00:03:35,302
No, no, it's cool.
86
00:03:35,345 --> 00:03:37,956
It's just that,
you know, Boochy?
87
00:03:38,000 --> 00:03:40,872
When I think of a guy
who does what he does,
88
00:03:40,916 --> 00:03:42,265
I don't think "Boochy."
89
00:03:42,309 --> 00:03:43,962
Well, start thinking it.
90
00:03:44,006 --> 00:03:45,268
Man, you lucky my mama here...
91
00:03:45,312 --> 00:03:46,704
Ah-ah-ah. I'm thinking "Boochy."
92
00:03:47,966 --> 00:03:49,272
Uh, Mom?
93
00:03:49,316 --> 00:03:50,882
Hmm? Where's Dad?
94
00:03:50,926 --> 00:03:53,102
Oh, sweetie, I'm sorry.
95
00:03:53,145 --> 00:03:55,017
I told him to call you.
96
00:03:55,060 --> 00:03:56,323
Call us?
97
00:03:56,366 --> 00:03:58,890
Mom, you know Daddy
hates talking on the phone.
98
00:03:58,934 --> 00:04:00,501
Well, yes, well,
99
00:04:00,544 --> 00:04:04,026
he ended up going on a
hunting trip with some friends.
100
00:04:04,069 --> 00:04:05,767
Hunting? Mmm.
101
00:04:05,810 --> 00:04:07,769
Since when did
Daddy start hunting?
102
00:04:07,812 --> 00:04:09,858
Well, that's what I asked.
103
00:04:09,901 --> 00:04:11,425
And he'd never been,
104
00:04:11,468 --> 00:04:13,209
so he wanted to give it a try.
105
00:04:13,253 --> 00:04:15,733
He usually doesn't miss an
opportunity to visit with the kids.
106
00:04:15,777 --> 00:04:17,909
Well, I guess I'll take
your bag upstairs.
107
00:04:17,953 --> 00:04:19,563
Thank you, Mr. Tibbs.
108
00:04:22,914 --> 00:04:23,959
What you laughing at, Boochy?
109
00:04:28,442 --> 00:04:29,921
Good morning, Boochy.
110
00:04:29,965 --> 00:04:31,793
Good morning, honey. Good morning.
111
00:04:31,836 --> 00:04:34,317
Can you button these little buttons
for me? I can never get these.
112
00:04:34,361 --> 00:04:36,101
Mmm-hmm. Baby...
113
00:04:36,145 --> 00:04:38,626
Hmm? Can you do something
for me today?
114
00:04:38,669 --> 00:04:40,541
You want me to take
your mother to the airport?
115
00:04:40,584 --> 00:04:42,325
Hey! No.
116
00:04:42,369 --> 00:04:45,197
I was thinking maybe you could
spend some time with my mother.
117
00:04:45,241 --> 00:04:46,808
Where? At the airport?
118
00:04:46,851 --> 00:04:49,114
Okay, that's two.
119
00:04:49,158 --> 00:04:51,465
Yeah, but I'm taking
my mother to lunch today.
120
00:04:51,508 --> 00:04:53,118
Perfect. So take
my mother with you.
121
00:04:53,815 --> 00:04:55,556
I don't wanna!
122
00:04:55,599 --> 00:04:57,514
Go.I don't wanna!
123
00:04:57,558 --> 00:04:59,081
Go! Ooh!
124
00:04:59,734 --> 00:05:01,039
Go.
125
00:05:01,083 --> 00:05:03,128
Don't forget your pah-pah
and your sippy cup.
126
00:05:06,784 --> 00:05:08,351
Hey, Suzanne. Hmm?
127
00:05:08,395 --> 00:05:11,789
There's something real fishy
about Mama's hunting story.
128
00:05:11,833 --> 00:05:13,443
What do you mean? Let me get
one of them strawberries.
129
00:05:13,487 --> 00:05:14,966
No, get out of my plate.
130
00:05:15,010 --> 00:05:17,621
Well, I called his cell
phone several times,
131
00:05:17,665 --> 00:05:19,362
and it went
straight to voice mail.
132
00:05:19,406 --> 00:05:21,146
So, what, then? I left a message.
133
00:05:22,060 --> 00:05:23,323
After that?
134
00:05:23,366 --> 00:05:24,628
You know me.
135
00:05:24,672 --> 00:05:26,761
I pulled the Nevada
hunting and fishing records,
136
00:05:26,804 --> 00:05:28,502
and he wasn't there.
137
00:05:28,545 --> 00:05:30,852
So, what? You think she's lying?
138
00:05:30,895 --> 00:05:33,202
I don't know,
but I'm gonna find out.
139
00:05:33,245 --> 00:05:35,465
'Cause you're not
supposed to lie to family.
140
00:05:35,509 --> 00:05:36,858
Really?
141
00:05:36,901 --> 00:05:39,643
Is that what you tell your
friends down at the IRS?
142
00:05:53,701 --> 00:05:56,007
You didn't tell me
she was gonna be here.
143
00:05:56,051 --> 00:05:59,446
And he didn't tell me
you were going to be here.
144
00:05:59,489 --> 00:06:01,012
All right, stop it, you two.
145
00:06:01,056 --> 00:06:02,318
You can't fight forever.
146
00:06:03,406 --> 00:06:05,713
You don't know that.
147
00:06:05,756 --> 00:06:07,845
Well, Suzanne thought
it would be a good idea
148
00:06:07,889 --> 00:06:09,369
if we all went
to lunch together.
149
00:06:09,412 --> 00:06:11,458
And you know what I
think about what she thinks.
150
00:06:11,501 --> 00:06:13,764
And what might that be?
151
00:06:13,808 --> 00:06:15,070
How about some buffalo wings?
152
00:06:15,113 --> 00:06:17,855
Uh, mozzarella sticks,
jalapeno poppers?
153
00:06:17,899 --> 00:06:21,990
You know, Frank used to bring
me to this place all the time.
154
00:06:22,033 --> 00:06:24,035
And why are we
talking about Frank?
155
00:06:24,079 --> 00:06:26,124
You see, the
thing with Frank is,
156
00:06:26,168 --> 00:06:28,431
I understood
what his flaws were.
157
00:06:28,475 --> 00:06:30,477
He made some big mistakes.
158
00:06:30,520 --> 00:06:32,566
I got that.
But nobody's perfect.
159
00:06:32,609 --> 00:06:35,003
I knew what I was dealing with.
160
00:06:35,046 --> 00:06:38,833
Now, Captain Too-good -to-be-true
here is a ticking time bomb,
161
00:06:38,876 --> 00:06:40,269
and I don't know
when he's gonna go off.
162
00:06:40,312 --> 00:06:41,662
Edamame?
163
00:06:41,705 --> 00:06:44,186
Are you really gonna sit
here and side with the man
164
00:06:44,229 --> 00:06:47,363
who kicked your daughter
and grandkids to the curb?
165
00:06:47,407 --> 00:06:48,669
Can we get
a pitcher here, please?
166
00:06:48,712 --> 00:06:51,280
You know what? You are right.
167
00:06:51,323 --> 00:06:53,543
I'm gonna get
the mayor on the phone,
168
00:06:53,587 --> 00:06:55,937
and I'm gonna get him
the key to the city.
169
00:06:55,980 --> 00:06:58,461
And by the way, what
size cape do you wear?
170
00:06:58,505 --> 00:07:00,420
A 44 long?
171
00:07:00,463 --> 00:07:03,379
And then we're
gonna call you Supernick.
172
00:07:03,771 --> 00:07:05,033
Shoo!
173
00:07:06,208 --> 00:07:08,950
Fried ice cream. Wow.
This is some good stuff.
174
00:07:08,993 --> 00:07:10,430
I haven't had that
in a long time.
175
00:07:10,473 --> 00:07:11,735
Boy, they got apple pies...
176
00:07:11,779 --> 00:07:14,390
I think we need to
cut to the cocktail.
177
00:07:14,434 --> 00:07:16,566
Hey, whatever you want.
Cocktails, here we go.
178
00:07:16,610 --> 00:07:17,698
Get me a double.
179
00:07:27,142 --> 00:07:28,491
Hey, Mom.Hi.
180
00:07:28,535 --> 00:07:29,753
How did it go?
181
00:07:29,797 --> 00:07:31,581
You didn't tell me his
mom was gonna be there.
182
00:07:32,060 --> 00:07:34,323
Ah, yes.
183
00:07:34,366 --> 00:07:36,499
If I had told you that,
you wouldn't have gone.
184
00:07:36,543 --> 00:07:37,805
Exactly.
185
00:07:39,110 --> 00:07:41,156
Jim, Jim, come on.
186
00:07:41,199 --> 00:07:44,072
I'm gonna have those quarterly
reports on your desk in the morning.
187
00:07:45,856 --> 00:07:47,292
We need to talk.
188
00:07:47,336 --> 00:07:48,816
Mom. Hmm?
189
00:07:48,859 --> 00:07:49,991
Where's Daddy?
190
00:07:51,383 --> 00:07:53,647
Look, I told you
he was on a hunting trip.
191
00:07:54,604 --> 00:07:56,388
That's what you told us,
192
00:07:56,432 --> 00:07:57,781
but that's not the truth.
193
00:07:57,825 --> 00:07:59,043
Are you calling
your mother a liar?
194
00:07:59,435 --> 00:08:00,610
No.
195
00:08:01,785 --> 00:08:04,832
We're just asking
why he didn't come.
196
00:08:07,051 --> 00:08:09,793
He didn't come
because we're breaking up.
197
00:08:09,837 --> 00:08:11,882
Breaking up?
You can't be breaking up!
198
00:08:11,926 --> 00:08:13,536
Yes, we can.
199
00:08:13,580 --> 00:08:16,017
But, Ma,
what's gonna happen to us?
200
00:08:17,671 --> 00:08:18,846
Why don't you ask him?
201
00:08:19,803 --> 00:08:20,935
We'll be good.
202
00:08:23,198 --> 00:08:24,765
"What's gonna happen to us?"
203
00:08:24,808 --> 00:08:26,114
Boy, we grown!
204
00:08:30,292 --> 00:08:31,511
Sweetheart,
205
00:08:32,816 --> 00:08:35,036
I need to tell you
something about my mom.
206
00:08:35,079 --> 00:08:37,299
No, let me tell you
something about your mother.
207
00:08:37,342 --> 00:08:39,519
Honey, it'll just
take a second. No, no, just one second.
208
00:08:39,562 --> 00:08:42,652
I mean, really, what is
her problem with me?
209
00:08:42,696 --> 00:08:45,350
All right, I'm spending
my money taking her out,
210
00:08:45,394 --> 00:08:47,527
and all she can
talk about is Frank.
211
00:08:47,570 --> 00:08:50,007
Frank this and Frank that. Nick, listen...
212
00:08:50,051 --> 00:08:51,748
No, just one second, all right?
213
00:08:51,792 --> 00:08:54,969
I may not be perfect,
but I'm better than him.
214
00:08:55,012 --> 00:08:57,014
How can she be mad
that we're together?
215
00:08:57,058 --> 00:08:58,233
Shoot.
216
00:08:58,276 --> 00:08:59,713
You're the one that's winning.
217
00:08:59,756 --> 00:09:02,324
What is that supposed to mean?
218
00:09:02,367 --> 00:09:04,979
Well, I'm just saying... Oh, I know
what you're saying.
219
00:09:05,022 --> 00:09:07,764
You're saying that you
think I'm lucky to have you.
220
00:09:07,808 --> 00:09:09,461
I didn't say that.
221
00:09:09,505 --> 00:09:12,464
So, what? You're saying that
you think you did me a favor?
222
00:09:12,508 --> 00:09:13,814
I did not say that.
223
00:09:13,857 --> 00:09:15,380
Oh, but you may as well have,
224
00:09:15,424 --> 00:09:17,382
because it's obvious you
think you're better than me!
225
00:09:17,426 --> 00:09:19,950
Those are not the words
that came out of my mouth.
226
00:09:19,994 --> 00:09:21,517
Well, you may not have said it,
227
00:09:21,561 --> 00:09:23,650
but clearly, Nick,
that's what you're thinking.
228
00:09:23,693 --> 00:09:26,043
Oh, babe, come... here, honey?
229
00:09:27,697 --> 00:09:28,829
Oh!
230
00:09:28,872 --> 00:09:29,917
Oh, come on!
231
00:09:33,573 --> 00:09:34,704
Good morning!
232
00:09:35,618 --> 00:09:37,141
Hey.
233
00:09:37,185 --> 00:09:38,534
You want to talk about it?
234
00:09:38,578 --> 00:09:40,405
No.You sure?
235
00:09:40,449 --> 00:09:41,842
I'm sure. You sure?
236
00:09:41,885 --> 00:09:43,626
Yeah. Last chance.
237
00:09:43,670 --> 00:09:45,323
I'm fine.Cool.
238
00:09:45,367 --> 00:09:47,412
It's just, Nick and I... Okay, you need to
make up your mind,
239
00:09:47,456 --> 00:09:48,936
because it's not like
I didn't give you choices.
240
00:09:48,979 --> 00:09:50,198
I said, "You wanna talk
about it?" You said, "No."
241
00:09:50,241 --> 00:09:51,460
I said, "You sure?"
You said you're sure.
242
00:09:51,503 --> 00:09:52,983
I said, "You sure?"
You said you're sure.
243
00:09:53,027 --> 00:09:54,158
Gigi! What?
244
00:09:55,682 --> 00:09:56,900
I need to ask you something.
245
00:09:57,597 --> 00:09:58,641
Okay.
246
00:10:01,165 --> 00:10:03,733
Have you ever felt like you
weren't good enough for somebody?
247
00:10:05,126 --> 00:10:06,910
No.
248
00:10:06,954 --> 00:10:10,348
I think I'm perfect, but other
people seem to disagree.
249
00:10:10,392 --> 00:10:12,089
Who are we talking about?
250
00:10:12,133 --> 00:10:14,657
I think Nick thinks
that he's better than me.
251
00:10:14,701 --> 00:10:16,224
Did he say that?
252
00:10:16,267 --> 00:10:18,095
No, but that's what
he was thinking.
253
00:10:18,139 --> 00:10:20,097
Since when do you know what
people are thinking, Suzanne?
254
00:10:20,141 --> 00:10:21,969
I knew what he meant.
255
00:10:22,012 --> 00:10:24,232
What am I thinking, now?
256
00:10:24,275 --> 00:10:25,668
Gigi, this is serious.
257
00:10:25,712 --> 00:10:28,062
That's not what I'm thinking.
258
00:10:28,105 --> 00:10:30,194
You're thinking, I don't
know what you're thinking.
259
00:10:30,238 --> 00:10:31,805
That's what I was
thinking a second ago.
260
00:10:31,848 --> 00:10:33,197
Gigi! Pickles!
261
00:10:33,241 --> 00:10:35,286
What? That's what
I was thinking. Pickles.
262
00:10:35,330 --> 00:10:38,159
See, 'cause I knew you would
never think I was thinking pickles.
263
00:10:38,202 --> 00:10:39,595
Are you through?
264
00:10:39,639 --> 00:10:41,118
I don't know.
265
00:10:41,162 --> 00:10:43,077
You're the one who knows
what people are thinking.
266
00:10:44,731 --> 00:10:46,123
Okay.
267
00:10:46,167 --> 00:10:49,561
Okay, maybe you and
Nick are just stressed out.
268
00:10:49,605 --> 00:10:51,172
I mean,
your parents are visiting,
269
00:10:51,215 --> 00:10:52,652
so why don't you guys talk
about it after they leave?
270
00:10:54,436 --> 00:10:56,394
Actually, it's just my mother.
271
00:10:56,438 --> 00:10:58,658
What? Your dad didn't come?
272
00:10:58,701 --> 00:11:00,050
They're always together.
273
00:11:01,573 --> 00:11:02,792
They're breaking up.
274
00:11:03,924 --> 00:11:07,579
No... Suzanne. Breaking up?
275
00:11:07,623 --> 00:11:09,973
I mean, they've been
together for over 40 years.
276
00:11:11,758 --> 00:11:14,804
If they break up, I mean,
what's gonna happen to me?
277
00:11:18,982 --> 00:11:21,550
You see, this is why I
didn't want to talk about this.
278
00:11:21,593 --> 00:11:23,160
Then you should have said that.
279
00:11:23,204 --> 00:11:25,859
It's not like I know what
people are thinking, Suzanne.
280
00:11:25,902 --> 00:11:27,512
I don't have your gift!
281
00:11:36,347 --> 00:11:39,089
Mom, we need to talk about this.
282
00:11:39,133 --> 00:11:40,874
Why?
283
00:11:40,917 --> 00:11:42,310
What are you gonna do about it?
284
00:11:43,398 --> 00:11:44,921
All right, look, back up.
285
00:11:44,965 --> 00:11:46,096
What happened?
286
00:11:48,838 --> 00:11:51,014
Your father is cheating on me.
287
00:11:51,058 --> 00:11:52,537
What? What?
288
00:11:52,581 --> 00:11:53,625
I know.
289
00:11:54,365 --> 00:11:55,627
It's hard to believe.
290
00:11:55,671 --> 00:11:57,064
I didn't believe it
either, but it's true.
291
00:11:57,107 --> 00:11:59,588
Oh, no, it ain't
going down like that.
292
00:11:59,631 --> 00:12:00,763
I'm going out there.
293
00:12:00,807 --> 00:12:02,286
And what you gonna do?
Raise his taxes?
294
00:12:02,809 --> 00:12:04,114
Maybe.
295
00:12:04,158 --> 00:12:06,073
Mom, are you sure about this?
296
00:12:06,116 --> 00:12:07,814
It doesn't even
sound like Daddy.
297
00:12:07,857 --> 00:12:10,642
Plus, you guys
do everything together.
298
00:12:10,686 --> 00:12:11,774
Until now.
299
00:12:12,688 --> 00:12:14,211
Okay, so who is she?
300
00:12:14,255 --> 00:12:15,560
Do you know how he met her?
301
00:12:17,258 --> 00:12:18,694
On Facebook.
302
00:12:18,738 --> 00:12:20,261
Face what?
303
00:12:20,304 --> 00:12:24,134
Yes, he's got all these
women writing on his wall,
304
00:12:24,178 --> 00:12:25,745
liking his status,
305
00:12:26,615 --> 00:12:27,747
poking him!
306
00:12:27,790 --> 00:12:29,052
Okay, wait a minute.
Wait a minute.
307
00:12:29,096 --> 00:12:31,489
Is he actually going out
and meeting these women?
308
00:12:31,533 --> 00:12:32,795
Well, he says he isn't.
309
00:12:33,927 --> 00:12:36,799
But, look,
the man is 60 years old.
310
00:12:36,843 --> 00:12:40,847
What is he doing with
375 new female friends?
311
00:12:42,849 --> 00:12:44,502
Daddy ain't cheating on you.
312
00:12:44,546 --> 00:12:46,069
Mmm-mmm. Well, how do you know?
313
00:12:46,113 --> 00:12:48,419
He better not be.
That's how I know.
314
00:12:48,463 --> 00:12:50,204
Okay.
315
00:12:50,247 --> 00:12:54,208
Just because he's on Facebook
doesn't mean that he's cheating on you.
316
00:12:54,251 --> 00:12:56,776
Mmm-hmm. Well, I'm no fool.
317
00:12:57,864 --> 00:12:59,474
It starts with poking,
318
00:12:59,517 --> 00:13:00,562
and it ends that way.
319
00:13:01,911 --> 00:13:03,347
Daddy loves you.
320
00:13:03,391 --> 00:13:04,522
Okay, you don't throw away
321
00:13:04,566 --> 00:13:07,482
a 40-year relationship
over a website.
322
00:13:07,525 --> 00:13:10,137
At least, not that website.
323
00:13:10,180 --> 00:13:11,268
Well, tell him that.
324
00:13:14,881 --> 00:13:16,360
Excuse me.
325
00:13:17,231 --> 00:13:19,015
Pam, can I have a word with you?
326
00:13:19,842 --> 00:13:21,583
Is the word "bounce"?
327
00:13:21,626 --> 00:13:22,845
Chill, Boochy.
328
00:13:22,889 --> 00:13:24,368
Baby, not now.
329
00:13:24,891 --> 00:13:26,457
Yes, now.
330
00:13:26,501 --> 00:13:29,852
No, if Mr. Goodbar wants
to talk, let Mr. Goodbar talk.
331
00:13:30,984 --> 00:13:33,769
First of all, my name is Nick,
332
00:13:33,813 --> 00:13:35,336
not Mr. Goodbar,
333
00:13:35,379 --> 00:13:37,468
not Captain Too-
good-to-be-true,
334
00:13:37,512 --> 00:13:40,297
not Boy Wonder,
not Action Jackson,
335
00:13:40,341 --> 00:13:42,647
not Dr. Feelgood,
not Dudley Do-Right...
336
00:13:42,691 --> 00:13:44,127
Honey!
337
00:13:44,171 --> 00:13:46,216
We're family, now.
338
00:13:46,260 --> 00:13:50,090
So, I think you need to know that I
don't appreciate you coming into my house
339
00:13:50,133 --> 00:13:52,788
and stirring up trouble
between me and my wife.
340
00:13:52,832 --> 00:13:54,572
Sweetheart!
341
00:13:54,616 --> 00:13:56,313
You know what, I'm not surprised
your man didn't come with you.
342
00:13:56,357 --> 00:13:58,098
I wouldn't, either!
You know what?
343
00:13:58,141 --> 00:14:00,230
He's probably happy you gone.
344
00:14:00,274 --> 00:14:03,712
Just sitting around the house,
just having a good time,
345
00:14:03,755 --> 00:14:05,496
loving every minute of it. Darling!
346
00:14:05,540 --> 00:14:08,108
He's smiling
and enjoying his day,
347
00:14:08,151 --> 00:14:09,892
while you're over here
messing up mine.
348
00:14:09,936 --> 00:14:12,025
All right, that's it, man.
I'm about to knock...
349
00:14:12,068 --> 00:14:13,243
Please.
350
00:14:13,287 --> 00:14:15,289
Oh, what you gonna
do, huh? Audit me?
351
00:14:18,945 --> 00:14:20,860
You want to mess up
somebody's marriage?
352
00:14:20,903 --> 00:14:23,732
Go home and
mess up your own, okay?
353
00:14:34,612 --> 00:14:37,311
Nick! My mom and dad
just broke up!
354
00:14:38,312 --> 00:14:39,400
Today? Yes!
355
00:14:40,575 --> 00:14:41,881
Oh, my bad!
356
00:14:45,188 --> 00:14:49,062
So, you tell your wife you
think you're better than her.
357
00:14:49,105 --> 00:14:53,240
And then you made Terrence's
mother cry in front of Terrence? Hmm.
358
00:14:53,283 --> 00:14:55,546
While you're at it, why don't
you just punch her kids in the face
359
00:14:55,590 --> 00:14:58,375
and tell them you had a
baby with the housekeeper.
360
00:14:58,419 --> 00:15:00,464
I didn't say
I was better than her.
361
00:15:00,508 --> 00:15:02,118
I just said, as far
as the relationship goes,
362
00:15:02,162 --> 00:15:04,077
she's the one that's winning.
363
00:15:04,120 --> 00:15:05,600
Well, of course she is.
364
00:15:05,643 --> 00:15:08,168
Show me a culture where
a woman has five husbands.
365
00:15:08,211 --> 00:15:09,430
What are you talking about?
366
00:15:09,996 --> 00:15:11,519
All I'm saying is,
367
00:15:11,562 --> 00:15:13,956
women know that women have
a harder time finding a husband
368
00:15:14,000 --> 00:15:15,958
than a man does finding a wife.
369
00:15:16,002 --> 00:15:18,787
If you and Suzanne both went out
and asked 100 people to marry you,
370
00:15:18,830 --> 00:15:21,442
you would get a lot more women
saying yes than she would get men.
371
00:15:21,485 --> 00:15:22,965
It's just the way it is.
372
00:15:23,009 --> 00:15:25,446
So, to balance things out, we
put women up on a pedestal.
373
00:15:25,489 --> 00:15:27,622
The problem is, once they
get up there, they're like,
374
00:15:27,665 --> 00:15:29,885
"Oh, look at me.
I'm up on a pedestal."
375
00:15:29,929 --> 00:15:33,062
So, inevitably, a man feels
the need to knock them down.
376
00:15:33,106 --> 00:15:34,846
It's really quite cruel.
377
00:15:34,890 --> 00:15:37,545
Well, is there anything else you
got to tell me that's not gonna help?
378
00:15:38,589 --> 00:15:40,113
So, she's not
talking to you at all?
379
00:15:40,548 --> 00:15:41,723
No.
380
00:15:41,766 --> 00:15:43,246
Then you truly are winning.
381
00:15:47,294 --> 00:15:49,165
Hey. Mind a little company?
382
00:15:49,209 --> 00:15:50,732
If you've come to beat up on me,
383
00:15:50,775 --> 00:15:52,560
don't bother.
I'm down for the count.
384
00:15:53,474 --> 00:15:54,779
That's not why I'm here.
385
00:15:59,959 --> 00:16:01,003
Thank you.
386
00:16:01,047 --> 00:16:02,874
Now, just so we're clear,
387
00:16:02,918 --> 00:16:05,268
you know I don't like you,
and you don't like me.
388
00:16:05,312 --> 00:16:07,488
No, it's not as simple
as that, now, is it?
389
00:16:07,531 --> 00:16:09,446
Oh, isn't it? No.
390
00:16:09,490 --> 00:16:11,840
I don't trust your son,
and you don't like that.
391
00:16:11,883 --> 00:16:13,494
So, subsequently,
you don't like me,
392
00:16:13,537 --> 00:16:15,235
and because of that,
I don't like you.
393
00:16:16,584 --> 00:16:18,238
That kind of thinking,
394
00:16:18,281 --> 00:16:20,196
that's what's
messing up your marriage.
395
00:16:20,240 --> 00:16:21,545
Well, how do you know?
396
00:16:21,589 --> 00:16:23,460
Because you tell people
what they're thinking,
397
00:16:23,504 --> 00:16:25,027
instead of asking them.
398
00:16:25,071 --> 00:16:27,421
Well... Look, Pam.
399
00:16:27,464 --> 00:16:30,163
I know this is
none of my business.
400
00:16:30,206 --> 00:16:33,688
But you need to go back
home and talk to your husband.
401
00:16:33,731 --> 00:16:35,168
And why would I do that?
402
00:16:35,211 --> 00:16:37,170
Girl, you don't
want to be single again.
403
00:16:37,213 --> 00:16:39,955
Mmm? Honey, it is crazy out here.
404
00:16:39,999 --> 00:16:42,784
I mean, they made the
problems bigger and stronger.
405
00:16:43,437 --> 00:16:45,613
Men are crazier.
406
00:16:45,656 --> 00:16:48,007
Facebook would be the
least of your problems.
407
00:16:48,050 --> 00:16:49,225
Let me tell you something.
408
00:16:49,269 --> 00:16:51,271
I dated a guy,
had four identities,
409
00:16:51,314 --> 00:16:52,837
and none of them were his.
410
00:16:54,839 --> 00:16:57,886
Why does he have to sit
there on that stupid computer
411
00:16:57,929 --> 00:16:59,148
playing games with strangers?
412
00:16:59,192 --> 00:17:00,628
I mean, if he's not
looking for somebody,
413
00:17:00,671 --> 00:17:01,933
then what is he doing?
414
00:17:01,977 --> 00:17:03,805
Did you ask? That's not the point.
415
00:17:03,848 --> 00:17:05,067
Yeah, it kind of is.
416
00:17:06,242 --> 00:17:08,505
Pam, there are
a lot worse things
417
00:17:08,549 --> 00:17:10,377
he could be looking up
on the Internet.
418
00:17:10,420 --> 00:17:11,421
Trust me on that.
419
00:17:15,295 --> 00:17:16,513
Oh.
420
00:17:17,123 --> 00:17:18,254
Maybe I, um...
421
00:17:19,734 --> 00:17:21,257
overreacted a little bit.
422
00:17:21,997 --> 00:17:23,216
Just a little bit.
423
00:17:27,611 --> 00:17:28,830
Here's to going home.
424
00:17:35,010 --> 00:17:36,316
Honey, can I talk
to you, please?
425
00:17:36,359 --> 00:17:39,145
Well, honey,
hold on for a second.
426
00:17:41,843 --> 00:17:43,323
I have something I want to say.
427
00:17:47,675 --> 00:17:49,416
I'm sorry.
428
00:17:49,459 --> 00:17:51,157
You know, I overreacted.
429
00:17:51,200 --> 00:17:52,680
Baby... No.
430
00:17:52,723 --> 00:17:54,899
When I found out that my
parents were breaking up,
431
00:17:55,683 --> 00:17:57,467
I got really scared.
432
00:17:57,511 --> 00:17:59,252
Well, honey... Well, hold on a second.
433
00:17:59,295 --> 00:18:00,818
It's just...
434
00:18:00,862 --> 00:18:02,951
I don't know what
the future holds for us.
435
00:18:03,908 --> 00:18:05,693
But what I do know
436
00:18:05,736 --> 00:18:08,957
is that I am so lucky
to have you by my side.
437
00:18:10,176 --> 00:18:12,352
Baby, you don't
have to say that.
438
00:18:12,395 --> 00:18:15,355
Well, Nick, I don't
know if you realize
439
00:18:15,398 --> 00:18:17,052
what you've done for me.
440
00:18:17,096 --> 00:18:19,881
I don't think I could have
found somebody better than you.
441
00:18:24,059 --> 00:18:25,626
So, what are you saying?
442
00:18:25,669 --> 00:18:28,194
That maybe you could have
found somebody better than me?
443
00:18:29,020 --> 00:18:30,631
I didn't say that.
444
00:18:30,674 --> 00:18:31,806
What do you mean?
445
00:18:31,849 --> 00:18:32,981
I'm just saying...
446
00:18:33,024 --> 00:18:34,591
No, I know what
you're saying, all right?
447
00:18:34,635 --> 00:18:36,202
You're saying you think
you better than me.
448
00:18:36,245 --> 00:18:37,986
That's what you saying.
449
00:18:38,029 --> 00:18:41,207
Nick, honey! Those are not the
words that came out of my mouth!
450
00:18:43,426 --> 00:18:45,124
Honey! No, please!
451
00:18:45,167 --> 00:18:46,734
No, you're... You see this?
452
00:18:46,777 --> 00:18:48,388
Oh, you're giving me
the gas face.
453
00:18:48,431 --> 00:18:49,606
Honey, please.
454
00:18:49,650 --> 00:18:50,694
Aw.
455
00:18:53,393 --> 00:18:54,524
I love you.
456
00:18:56,918 --> 00:18:59,094
Cheese! Pepperoni!
457
00:19:01,227 --> 00:19:02,706
Marilyn...
458
00:19:02,750 --> 00:19:04,273
Come on, Grandma!
459
00:19:04,317 --> 00:19:06,101
Say it again and see
what happens to you.
460
00:19:07,668 --> 00:19:09,974
All right. You guys squeeze in.
461
00:19:10,018 --> 00:19:11,193
Big smiles.
462
00:19:11,237 --> 00:19:13,804
Pepperoni! Love it! Ah, perfect!
463
00:19:13,848 --> 00:19:15,763
I love you! Bye, Grandma.
464
00:19:15,806 --> 00:19:17,547
Oh, bye. Love you, Grandma.
465
00:19:17,591 --> 00:19:18,635
And thank you for my gifts.
466
00:19:18,679 --> 00:19:19,810
Remember...
467
00:19:22,900 --> 00:19:24,032
Leaving already?
468
00:19:24,075 --> 00:19:25,381
I mean, you just got here.
469
00:19:25,425 --> 00:19:27,862
Okay, you keep this up
and I'm not leaving, Nick.
470
00:19:29,603 --> 00:19:31,344
Did you hear that? Mmm-hmm!
471
00:19:31,387 --> 00:19:32,823
You called me Nick.
472
00:19:32,867 --> 00:19:33,911
Don't get used to it.
473
00:19:35,913 --> 00:19:37,045
Aw, yay.
474
00:19:38,655 --> 00:19:40,527
Goodbye, Mom. Bye, sweetheart.
475
00:19:40,570 --> 00:19:42,355
I love you. I love you, too.
476
00:19:42,398 --> 00:19:44,661
Thank you so much for coming.
And next time, bring Dad.
477
00:19:44,705 --> 00:19:46,489
I will. I will.Okay.
478
00:19:47,925 --> 00:19:49,231
Marilyn...
479
00:19:49,275 --> 00:19:50,537
Pam.
480
00:19:50,580 --> 00:19:52,278
Good luck. Thank you.
481
00:19:53,061 --> 00:19:54,149
Mom.
482
00:19:55,281 --> 00:19:58,632
Before you go,
I have a confession to make.
483
00:19:58,675 --> 00:20:00,373
Now, don't nobody
try to stop me.
484
00:20:02,853 --> 00:20:04,638
I haven't been
completely honest with you.
485
00:20:05,465 --> 00:20:07,467
Even though I look good,
486
00:20:07,510 --> 00:20:09,208
I'm not an accountant
for the IRS.
487
00:20:10,034 --> 00:20:11,862
I know. What?
488
00:20:11,906 --> 00:20:13,995
How? But, I mean,
I got my briefcase.
489
00:20:14,038 --> 00:20:16,389
Sweetheart, I'm your mother.
490
00:20:16,432 --> 00:20:18,739
Don't worry about how.
Just know that I know.
491
00:20:19,653 --> 00:20:21,176
And besides,
492
00:20:21,220 --> 00:20:23,004
you never got better
than a "C" in math,
493
00:20:23,047 --> 00:20:25,702
so, all of a sudden, you gonna
be an accountant? Child, please.
494
00:20:27,400 --> 00:20:29,793
Well, I want to tell you
what I actually do for...
495
00:20:29,837 --> 00:20:31,099
Ah, is it illegal?
496
00:20:32,187 --> 00:20:33,232
Technically, no.
497
00:20:34,276 --> 00:20:35,756
Good.
498
00:20:35,799 --> 00:20:38,062
So, as long as you don't
technically call me from jail,
499
00:20:38,106 --> 00:20:39,238
I don't need to know.
500
00:20:40,630 --> 00:20:42,328
Just be careful, please.
501
00:20:43,024 --> 00:20:44,460
I'll try.
502
00:20:44,504 --> 00:20:46,462
But if I call you from a
Cambodian death camp...
503
00:20:46,506 --> 00:20:48,159
Oh, Lord, please
don't scare me like that.
504
00:20:48,203 --> 00:20:49,422
Please, pick up.
505
00:20:52,729 --> 00:20:54,122
Oh, look.
506
00:20:56,516 --> 00:20:57,734
That's my mama.
35890
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